05x37 - Another Friday Night

[bunniefuu]

Give me a pack of menthol 100s and a

lottery ticket. Hey, Beavis.

There's a chick. Yeah. Go talk

to her, buddy. Come on. Uh.. You can

have this one, dude. I'm gonna wait

for something better. I think she wants

me anyways.

Go talk to her.

Okay. Yeah. Talk to her.

Yeah, I should do that, huhThat would be

cool.

We're gonna score. Shawnette,

would you hurry up and get your funky

butt out of the bed?Oh, did you hear that?

She just called her monkey buttYeah.

That was pretty cool. Yeah.

I'm getting kind of sick of Janet

Jackson. Yeah. She always has a

bunch of chicks sitting around talking

before the video. That's

a pretty nice hotel. Yeah. When you're

like rich and famous, you can stay in

those really nice hotels where they have

like adult videos and hourly rates

and stuff like that. How come hotels have

hourly rates anyway?Huh, dumbass

It only takes, like, an hour to do it.

Wow. A whole hour?

A whole whoreA

whole whoreYou can get on the phone

and be like, uh, room service?I'd

like some bacon and a couple

Cokes and a bunch of wh*res

Yeah, yeah

And a side order of poop. What did

you say, Beavis?Ohh I was just saying,

um, a tight order of

boop. Oh ohh boy.

Beavis, you just sent my b*ner into

the ground. Sorry about

that. I don't know, I thought it was

pretty cool.

To go with the horse, you knowShut up,

Biva!

Excuse me. Are those bunghole boys you're

wearing?Yes.

Bunghole boys. You want this?

Can you handle this?Could you handle

this, Biva?Um, yes, since

I can handle this!probably in the

lab.

Ohh What are you doing, Beaver?I'm doing

my monkey boy.

Damn it, Beaver, get down. I am getting

down.

Rat-a-tat-tat, fat a*s

Hey, you boneheads. You come in here

every Friday night, you stand there for

six hours scaring off my customers, and

all you ever buy is 1 damn soda. Uh,

yeah. You little turds will never get

near a woman. Now finish your sodas and

get out. Uh,

maybe that guy is right, Beavis. Yeah.

We probably should buy something else,

like something to eat. Uh,

how much money you got?

Uh, never enough damn dimes.

Uh..

Hello?Hey!

We want, like, some service or something.

We want some service, damn it. Is

anyone going to ring us up?What's goingon?

Don't worry, dude. I know how to work one

of these. Check this out.

Evening, ladies. Well, that be all for

you?Come on, buddy, I was here first!

Damn it, Beavis, can't you see I'm

working?So, uh..

Would you like anything else with that,

ladies?

What in the hell?

Police, this is Maximart. I got a robbery

in progress. Sir, are they armed?Armed?

Uh.. yeah, they're armed. Aren't all kids

armed?OK, where are you now?I'm in the

back room. OK, well, just stay there.

We'll send some men right over. I got

them now.

Let's see.

Damn it, I've done this before at Burger

World. Uh,

I'll be with you ladies in a minute. I

was first, you knowBut you can go.

That's the kind of guy I am.

Attention! We have the place surrounded.

Whoa, check it out. Maybe they're gonna,

like, sh**t someone. Cool!

Steady, steady, boys. I don't want a lot

of bloodshed.

I'll get it. Uh,

hello?Maximart, may I help you?

Listen, this is police Captain Finelli.

We don't want anyone to get hurt. You

tell us your demands, and we'll work this

thing out together.

Uh.. Hello?Just tell us what you want.

Anything. Really?

Hey, Beavis. He says we can have anything

we want. And he's a

cop. Get

nachos. Yeah, get some nachos. Uh,

could we have some nachos?Nachos?Uh,

okay. That would be

cool. And, uh, like,

uh, some burritos and corn nuts.

Yeah, yeah, and some string cheese. Yeah.

Can we, like, give some stuff to these

two chicks?

What do you care for, a wiener?

Where the hell are the cops?What are they

waiting for?

You sons of b*tches get out of my store!

I got a g*n back there. You come in here

again, I'm gonna use it.

Freeze!

Uh.. Hey, buddy. How are you thinking of

him?Shut up, Beavis. Oh, my God. You may

be about to see the coolest video you

have ever seen in your life. Ohh Now,

Beavis... Uh..

I'm it. Beavis.

Ohh Beavis.

Ohh

This guy's probably just like a stuntman

or something. I bet he's not even in the

band, huh

Like, what's this song supposed to be

about anyway?

Whoa! Uh, look at that dude

back there.

OhhBeavis!

Ohh Beavis, are you there?

Beavis, what's your problem?

Ohh

Beavis, it's not even real, it's just

like specially set.

Ohh This is cool. This

is a damn good video.

It's like... Bevus, are you gonna say

anything?No. Damn it, Bevus.

Snap out of it, dumbassI'm gonna change a

channel. Butthead, I'm only gonna tell

you this once. If you touch that remote,

I'm gonna kick your assYeah, right.

Ohh Damn it, Bevus. Snap out of it right

now. Oh,

what happened?Where am I?Uh,

you're right here, Beavis. What's

your problem?Whoa, I just like,

I just like blacked out or something.

What's going on?We just saw a dude

running around on fire. No way, really?

And I missed it?Uh, no, you saw the whole

thing, you dumbassWow.

I don't know, I wasn't here.

Captain, they're clean. No

g*ns?Uh, that guy inside,

like, threatened us with a g*n. Really?

Yeah, he said he was gonna sh**t us.

That's how this whole thing started.

Well, I think we've been had, boys. Let's

go in and get 'em.

Wait, what are you doing?

Well, you boys made it through a rough

ordeal and you managed to keep your cool.

You should be proud. Yeah,

we're pretty cool.