05x50 - Steamroller

[bunniefuu]

Howdy, Tom. Doing a little paving?

Yeah, I'm doing it myself this time. Look

like you got a little project going

there, Bill. Yeah, I'm putting in a new

hedge. Whoa, it's pretty

warm out here on the old tarmac. Boy, it

sure as hell is. I could use a tall, cold

one right about now. What do you say?

Sounds good to me. Aren't you going to

turn it off?No, sir. I

had a b*tch of a time starting her up

this morning.

You get her down at Morgan Rentals like I

told you?Yep, sure as hell did. She's

due back before noon, and I don't want to

get stuck paying for the weekend.

Well, fake bugs. This

is a Bjork chick.

I mean, I heard she, um, she has a, you

know, like a schlongWhere'd you

hear that?This

This guy told me. Uh, what guy?

Um, this guy in the bathroom.

You mean the bathroom at school?No, No

the bathroom right here. Right here in

this house. What are you talking about,

Beavis?There's this dude who's in there

sometimes. I'm serious. He's probably

still there. He was there this morning.

Damn it, Beavis. There's no one in

there. Yeah, there is. Go ahead. Go check

it out. Beavis.

You're a bunghole

Uh.. Beavis,

flush the toilet next time.

There wasn't anybody in there. Well

Usually he's in the mirror. Uh..

Does he look like a butt munch?Um, yeah.

Does he have, like, blonde hair?

Yeah, yeah, that's him, yeah. Yeah

And does he kind of talk like this?Oh,

yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah

Yeah, kind of like that. It kind of goes

like, Yeah, yeahBjork has a dog.

Dumb a*s

Hey, Bilas, did you do your homework?

Umm

Hey, you freakish punks. Did you miss the

school bus?

Rock on.

Todd kicks a*s

Someday we're going to have wheels just

like Todd. Yeah.

Then we can like, drive chicks to school.

You dumb assIf we ever get a car and

chicks, we're not going anywhere near a

school. Hey, hey buddy, check it

out!

Cool. Let's catch up with Todd

and those chicks. Yeah, yeah

Cool.

I'll tell you what, after some of the

problems I've had around here... I ain't

going to let no one touch my yard no

more. Yeah, I know what you mean.

I know a shortcut.

Now, the Earth's substrata are

continually shifting, creating fault

lines and occasional shock waves.

Hey, Butthead, how are we going to find

Todd?Uh, I think he's in

here.

When this happens, I can't believe this.

I think we're experiencing a slight

tremor right now.

Now, the magnitude of these tremors we're

feeling right now will be measured using

a device called the Richter

Yeah, Yep.

Thank God for the faculty lounge,

our only refuge from those little b*stards

Yeah, I know that's right. What

the hell?

Sorry about that.

What are you guys doing?You guys could

get in big trouble. Uh, we're looking

for Todd. You guys could go to jail for

this. Todd's in

jail?I don't know, but he

dropped out of school two years ago. Uh,

really?Oh, yeah. Oh,

yeah. Hey, we forgot.

Oh boy. Hey, look at that. He's trying to

be Forrest Gump. Yeah.

Life is like a little box of chocolate.

That

would be cool to like, try to pick up a

chick by giving her a box of chocolate.

'Cause unlike when you strike out, you

can at least eat the chocolate. Oh yeah,

that's not a bad idea. I think I'm gonna

go get me some NMMs and spice my monkey.

Uh, you know what they say about short

dudes?They got like, you know,

really big, uh.. You

knowYeah, yeah, I know, but you knowI

tried telling a chick that once, and she

said, I don't care how big your turdsare.

You dumbassYeah, no, I'm

serious, buddy. You know, I was going, I

got really long turds. I wanna see 'em.

Beavis. You were telling a chick

you have long turds?Yeah, yeah, and

it didn't work. I said, You know, they

call me Mr. Poop-a-Lot.

Beavis, you're making me sick. Shut up. I

was talking about wieners.

Ohh Oh, I see.

This thing's be too damn slow. We're

never gonna find Todd. Yeah, hey, really.

Well, I guess it's about that time.

Oh!

Ah, damn it, the damn thing quit on me. I

don't have time for this. What the hell

happened to my hedge?Boy, I'll tell you

what, I'm gonna give a piece of my mind

to them b*stards down at Morgan's. You

and your damn steamroller ruined my

hedge! To hell with your hedge, look at

my driveway. You're gonna pee for this,

Anderson! Like hell I am. You're the one

who told me to rent for Morgan's. Now get

the hell off my property, you son of a

b*tch

And if I ever see that damn dog of yours

peeing on my yard again, I'm gonna sh**t

both of ya. Got

a box full of

letters Wow. Something's

on. Something's different about this.

Yeah, it's like it sounds different and

looks different than like most other

videos you see lately. Yeah, yeah, yeah

Kind of cool. Yeah.

I'm hungry, Beavis. Go make some

pancakes. Come on, buddy. I want to watch

this. You can watch it later. It's

going to be on about 50 times.

Really. Oh, OK. I

guess I could eat some pancakes.

OK, where's the syrup?

Got to make the pancakes first, dumbass

Hey, where's the spatula?

I think it's in my bedroom. Oh, OK,

look under the bed. Oh,

here's a pan too. Hey, cool. Hey,

how's it going?Hey. Pretty

good. Um, hey.

OK.

How's that video?It's pretty cool. Now

shut up and get cooking. How

much mayonnaise do I put in?None.

One. What?Okay, I'll just put one

cup, then.

Hey, Butthead! There's supposed to

be smoke?Uh,

I think so.