02x02 - The Treasure of t*rd

[bunniefuu]

Hey, look. The Dungeons and Dragons

ride.

[Music]

Wow. Neat. Give me a break. I don't like

this.

What's happening?

[Applause]

Where are

we? Look

out. Fear not, Ranger.

[Applause]

[Music]

Barbarian, magician,

[Applause]

thief, cavalier, and acrobat.

[Music]

Who was that? That was Venger, the force

of evil. I am Dungeon Master, your guide

in the realm of Dungeons and

[Music]

Dragons. Come on, Uni. Hold still. This

is for your own good. Yeah, nobody likes

a dirty unicorn.

[Music]

This is a riot. You guys should take

this act on the road. A dry up,

Eric. Hey, I'm I'm all wet now. There's

a bulletin from the newsroom. Well,

since I'm wet anyway, maybe I'll just go

for a

swim.

[Music]

Then again, maybe not.

[Music]

That thing wasn't attacking. It was

running scared.

Oh, it's only you, dungeon master.

You are wise to be cautious, my young

friends. There is great danger ahead.

What this time, oh, terrible tour guide?

A danger so great that its very

existence might keep you from ever

finding your way home. What do you mean?

If this world is destroyed, you will

have no chance of returning from it to

your own. Who or what could do such a

thing? Demo dragon. A terrible creature,

half demon, half dragon, whose power

could devastate the realm. What can we

do? Seek out the city called t*rd's

Keep. This will aid you in finding it.

But how do we stop Demo Dragon? By

helping the one who stands against you.

What's that supposed to mean? Why can't

we ever get a straight answer from

[Music]

Dungeon Master Wheat? He's gone. Hey,

it's a map. There's t*rd's keep beyond

the dust lands.

Okay g*ng, let's hit the road.

Wrong road, Cavalier. The Deathlands are

this way. Oh. Oh, yeah. I knew

[Music]

that. According to the map, this is

supposed to be the wondrous wood.

Doesn't look too wondrous to me. Well,

the map says this is Alicorn River, but

it doesn't say anything about it being

frozen. Wait, I get it. Something's

burned down the woods and frozen the

river. Yeah, but what?

[Music]

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

[Applause]

I can see why they call these the dust

lands. Uh-huh. Hey, Presto, can't you

squeeze some water out of that hat? I

can try. Don't bother. Remember what

happened the last time? I got water,

didn't I? Yeah. In a bowl full of

goldfish. Yeah.

Look, that must be t*rd Keep.

Looks like we're not the only ones

interested in this place. orc soldiers.

Ah, terrific. That means Vender's

probably not far away.

[Applause]

[Music]

Go for it.

After that,

I've got you. You little alien. Who you

calling an

alien? Good going, Uni.

[Music]

It looks as though the bold young ones

will reach the gates, Queen Solinara.

Yes. And if they do, let them in. That

way, we may learn what Vger's plan

is.

Abracadabra and all those other magic

words.

Who says losing your marbles is bad?

That'll hold him for a while.

[Music]

I guess we better knock.

Oh, brother. I hope somebody's home.

Avenger.

[Music]

Not so fast, my young enemies.

Get inside quick.

Now I have you.

[Music]

Welcome to t*rd. I am Sulinara, Queen

of t*rd. Who are you? And what does

Venger want with you? He wants our

weapons. Ah, I see. He wants something

from us as well. The treasure of t*rd.

For years, he has tried to trick his way

into this keep.

Speak truthfully and quickly if you

would survive. Why are you here? Hey

lady, it's not our idea. I mean, Dungeon

Master told us to come here. Dungeon

Master, you know Dungeon Master? Well,

we don't we don't really know him. I

mean, not on a firstname basis or

anything like that, but Quiet, Eric?

Yes, we know Dungeon Master, and he did

send us here. Ah, this is good. Dungeon

Master is our friend. Oh, yeah. He's a

great guy, isn't he? Old DM and I are

just like that, right?

[Music]

Avenger, come with me.

[Music]

Sara, yield to me your treasure or face

the ultimate consequences.

Not even you can break Taro's keep

venture. These walls have been

strengthened by stone and spell for a

thousand years. You may control the rest

of the realm, but you will never control

us. Sara, let me show you what I am

capable of controlling.

[Music]

Team Dragon attack.

[Music]

[Music]

The gates are beginning to crack.

Impossible. No, it's not. Look, the heat

and cold are making them brittle. Come

on. We've got to stop Venture from

getting in here.

[Music]

[Music]

Now for Verger.

You are overconfident,

Ranger and a fool.

[Music]

One, let's not make him any madder than

he already is.

Wa! Huh? Hey.

Oh, great. Demo dragons got our weapons.

Yeah. Avengers got us.

Looks like the game is over.

[Music]

Give me the weapons, Steam Dragon.

[Music]

Without our weapons, we don't stand a

chance. Hey, you're the leader. What do

we do now? The only thing we can do,

run. I could have thought of that.

the weapons creature now.

I don't get it. What's that big lizard

trying to do? Your weapons have broken

Venge's spell of control. I created you.

You cannot defy me.

[Music]

We are safe for the moment. Maybe the

game's not over. Maybe not. But I'm

sitting out this inning. I need

something to eat. How can you think of

food at a time like this? Hey, I can't

save the world on an empty stomach.

Let's go, shrimp. Who you calling a

shrimp?

You have won some time for us, my

friends. How much I don't know. Perhaps

we will yet find a way to keep our

treasure from Venger's grasp. Just what

is this treasure, your highness, if I

may ask? Something Venger must never

possess. The only known crop of a rare

herb that can render the mightiest

dragon

helpless. Dragon Bane. So that's what

Verger's after. He wants the dragon Bane

to use against Tiiamat.

Tiiamat? An evil dragon and the only

creature Vvenger fears. Hey, wait a

minute. How come you didn't just dump

some of that stuff on Demo Dragon? No,

my friends. Ver created Demo Dragon,

hoping to trick us into doing just that.

And the Dragon Bane would have fallen

into his hands. But if Demo Dragon comes

back, you know he can break down those

doors. Sheesh. You risk your people,

your city, us just to protect some. You

do not understand.

[Music]

Our people are hiding in a land far

away. We who remain are volunteers. We

stay to guard the dragon bane. And if

the gates fall to destroy it. But but

then wouldn't you? Indeed. Then Venger

would surely destroy us.

Nice. Hi, Eric.

It's okay if you're into smells.

[Music]

I am pleased you like my garden. Here,

please accept this garand. It will bring

luck. Gee, thanks.

It's probably poison ivy. Eric,

come on. We better get back to the

others.

Vinger will regroup his orcs and attack

again soon.

One way or another, we've got to get our

weapons back. You're out of your mind.

How are we going to get them away from

Godzilla? Wait, remember what Dungeon

Master said? By helping the one who

stands against you. You mean who? I

think you mean Diana's right. I never

thought I'd say it, but Avengers our

only hope.

[Music]

Make friends with Verger. Oh, sure. How

are we supposed to do that? Buy him

another horn for his helmet. How are we

even going to find him or Deem Dragon?

That's how Teemo

[Music]

Dragon is

uncontrollable. More powerful than I

planned. He will destroy the realm

unless something is done. Together, we

could do that something. What? You want

to defeat Demo Dragon? And so do we.

Let's join forces.

You are a fool. Without your weapons,

you offer me nothing. Oh, yeah. You've

taken our weapons before, and we've

still whipped you.

Enough.

I agree to your proposal. Ranger,

approach

me. Hold out your hands.

afraid.

[Music]

Hank.

[Music]

Wow.

Aim the magic talisman at evil dragon

and call his name aloud. Now go and seek

me no more.

The trusting fools. Shadow demon, take

the orcs and how should I say, assist

our dragon slayers. With pleasure,

master.

[Music]

At least we don't have to worry about

demo dragon sneaking up on us.

[Music]

Let's hope Avengers gadget works.

Demo

Dragon. Nothing's happening. Veger

ripped us off. Come on, let's get out of

[Music]

here. Get down and cover your eyes.

[Music]

The light's blinding

him. Now's our chance to do what? That

thing's bigger than my dad's bank

account. Diana, where are you going? To

get our weapons.

[Music]

Diana,

look out. Here he comes. Run.

Oh no. Whoa. I hope we at least give him

a stomach ache.

Eric, you need

[Music]

[Music]

[Applause]

Did Did you guys see that? Uh-huh.

Presto, how'd you do that without your

magic hat? You kidding? I couldn't have

done that with 10 hats. You didn't do

it. This did. The treasure of t*rd.

So that's what Dragon Bane looks like.

Hey, the old gardener said it would

bring luck. Hey, I knew it all along.

That's why I risked my life to get Uni

that close to Demo Dragon. Eric, you

expect us to believe that? It doesn't

matter what he expects, Barbarian.

Surrender your weapons now. Shadow

demon, that is the worst idea I've ever

heard. Right, guys? Fools, you are

outnumbered. Oh. Oh, yeah. There might

be a zillion of you, but we've got one

of him. Me? What are you saying? Who do

you think zapped old Demo Dragon? The

tooth fairy. It was Presto. Listen,

Shadow Demon. Don't get him mad or he'll

turn you into uh he'll turn you into

cream spinach. Yeah, cream spinach.

[Applause]

Shadow demon, take the orcs and retreat.

Beware what you say when you speak a

magic wizard, for you shall see who has

the greater power.

As for you, Ranger, you have destroyed

that which I created. How I am not yet

certain, but you have restored the

balance. Now we are

even. The next time we meet, expect no

favors.

Likewise, Verger.

So be it.

Now I've seen everything. Wow. Verger's

letting us go. Keep your voices down

till we get out of here. We got to get

the you know what back to Queen

Solinara. Will she be glad to see us? I

hope she's glad enough to give us some

real food.

What do you know? You eat grass.

Hey, you think maybe Avengers is not all

bad? Sure. And Genghaskhan was a

stand-up comic.

You are wrong,

Cavalier. There was good in Venger once,

a long time ago. Everyone makes

mistakes. Venger was mine.

[Music]