02x06 - Nightmare on Chett Street

[bunniefuu]

Excuse me.

How could Miss Graham
call that a quiz?

It took the whole period.

She called it a quest--

A combination quiz and test.

So if Miss Graham is a
combination teacher

and w*nk*r does that make
her a tanker or a weacher?

I can't believe I blanked
on number three.

Shh! Shh! Shh!

- Which Gary.
- What?

I heard my name. She said, "Gary".

Paula Sparks?

I guarantee she wasn't
talking about you.

Which Gary? The geeky
blond guy with the B.O.?

No way.

Yeah. He's in this dream
I keep having.

She had a dream about me?

A beautiful babe
had a dream about me?

It's always the same.
We studying in Ms. Bouvier's

french class but no one
else in there

and it starts to get warm.
So I take off my sweater.

Oh, my God. Yes, yes, yes.

- Then he goes to kiss me...
- Yes, yes, yes.

- ...and it's, like, so amazing.
- The Monroe Doctrine!

Idiot! I could have
gotten a hundred.

- Shh. I can't hear.
- Wow! That last part is so hot.

I can't believe you dreamt
that about Gary. Wallace.

- Is that shirt a J. Crew?
- No!

I score with Paula Sparks.

And I don't even
know what I did.

- It was just her dream, Gary.
- But I was in that dream

doing things, unspeakable things--

Things I could be replaying
over and over in my mind.

What are Dad and
Chett doing here?

LISA: Maybe they came
by to share a mocha-chino.

Dad and Chett? Yeah, right.

I wish I could hear
what they were saying.

- I'll turn it up.
- There's no way I'm working here--

Toasting low-fat muffins for a
bunch of frasier taping cold heads?

I pulled a lot of strings
to get you this job

- so you're taking it.
- You had to pull springs

to get me a four-dollars-an-hour job?

You've had six months
to do better.

That's plenty of time
to get your life on track.

- I've been fine-tuning my resume.
- Look, Chett...

perhaps it's time we set
some limits for your own good.

- Define "limits."
- Okay.

If you fail to keep this job
I'm afraid we're going

to have to reassess
your living situations.

Meaning if I get fired

you're going to kick me
out of the house?

- That's one way to look at it, yes.
- Harsh.

Well, let's go talk
to Mr. Brinkman, shall we?

- Hey! Do you mind?
- So Chett has to get a job.

Big deal.

- How about two out of three.
- Sure.

This is unbearable.

I need to know
how Paula's dream ended.

Is there any way
you can help me?

I've got it.

I'll give you a machine that
will let you go inside her dreams.

- You could do that?
- I could go inside her dream?

Sure. Paula's bound to
dream about you again tonight

and when she does, you
will be there in person.

Can I come along?

You want to watch
Paula's sexy dream about me?

- What else am I going to do?
- Melrose place is a rerun.

The dream chair hold two.

Sweet! Let's do it.

Cozy.

A little frankensteinish,
but if it does the job...

- What do these buttons do?
- The top one sends you

through the dimensional wall
and into the dreams of whoever

you program the chair for.

The other's for
lower-back massage.

- Ah.
- Ah.

There's one rule
about dream space.

You have to get back
through the dream door

before the person wakes up,
or else.

- Or else what?
- Your astral self will be forced

out of the dreamscape and
deposited in the conious mind.

- Is that bad?
- Just get out in time, okay?

Gary?

- Did you hear what I just said?
- Yeah.

Something about leaving
a deposit. Let's blow.

I don't want to miss
any good parts.

Did you bring the camera?

- Ready?
- Punch it.

[ Both Yelling ]

Are we in?
Is this Paula Spark's dream?

It's got to be. This is
Ms. Bouvier's classroom.

Get pictures.

- My camera just turned into a cove.
- The fun's just beginning.

I had my birthday party
pictures in there.

Ooh, ooh, ooh.
There's Paula and me.

Just like she said.

[ Seductive Jazz Fusion Music ]

Now she's going to
take off her sweater...

...and now I kiss her.

[ Gasps ]

- Ms. Bouvier!
- Gary, what is going in here?

- You said you loved me.
- Oh, baby.

He did? He said he loved me.

In France, when two women
love the same man there is

only one course action
which is truly satisfying.

- Tongue bath!
- Death by fire.

- Burn him.
- ALL: Burn him! Burn him!

- No!
- Burn him! Burn him!

- No!
- Burn him! Burn him!

- I guess this is the part is missed.
- This bites.

Let's get out of here. Unless
you'd rather watch me fry.

Um...

- So, how was Paula's dream?
- It sucked, thank you so much.

I'm starving.
How long we been gone?

- Five hours. It's 4:00 a.m.
- What?

- It only felt like a few minutes.
- That's dream time.

Well, now it's snack time.
You up for a fridge raid?

Hey, what's he doing up?

He must be stressed about
starting work tomorrow.

- He probably feels nervous.
- And vulnerable.

Hey, let's go rub it on.

Hiya, big brother.

Well, if it isn't Captain Colon
and his sidekick butt boy.

You girls run out
of slumber party games?

You're very clever
with words, Chett.

I bet that'll help you
tomorrow at your new job.

You really think I'm worried
about some stupid, little job?

You're talking to a man
who can field-strip an m-16

wearing a blindfold
and handcuffs.

Question is, can you do it

wearing a hairnet
and a name tag?

- You're dead!
- [ Both Yelling ]

Hey, hey, hey!
The Truck City Triplets.

[ To "The Lone Ranger" ]:

# Get a truck, get a truck,
get a truck, truck, truck #

# Get a truck, get a truck,
get a truck, truck, truck #

# Get a truck, get a truck,
get a truck, truck, truck... #

- # Low down-payment terms. #
- They make me happy.

I'm not wasting any more
time on you skid marks.

I'm going to go
get some shut-eye.

You know, the fun
doesn't have to stop.

Have fun in Chett's head.

We'll bring you some...

- What's that?
- Your camcorder.

Sorry.

Why are we in Java Man?

Chett must be dreaming
about work.

[ Shattering ]

[ Echoing ]: Drop another
cup you lose your job.

You lose your job,
you're out of the house.

Yes, sir. Trying my best, sir.
Sorry, sir.

[ Echoing ]: Waiter,
if you can't make me

a decent cafe au lait
you're out of the house.

Coming right up, sir.

[ Echoing ]:
If you can't make

these dishes shine
you're out of the house!

# Do the job, do the job #
# Do the job, do the job #

# Do the job, do the job,
do the job, do the job #

# Do the job, do the job,
do the job, do the job #

# Or you're out of the house. #

So, what do you think's
bugging Chett?

I can't work any faster.

I was trained to serve
my country, not cappuccinos.

[ Echoing ]: You were
born to serve cappuccino.

[ Alarm Blaring ]

Gary, something's wrong.
We'd better get out of here.

- Gary?
- I'll be with you in a sec, Wy.

Cream or sugar, ladies?

Gary, it's closing. Come on!

Uh-oh.

I don't even drink coffee.

- Where's Gary?
- The dream door closed.

- He didn't get out in time.
- Chett woke up?

So, what's that mean?

Oh, no.

[ Army Cadence: ] # I don't
know but I've been told #

# This loaf of bread
seems mighty old. #

- Occupado, Mr. Roboto.
- Right.

I just wanted to say...
good luck on the new job.

You feeling okay?

You know, I'm getting
a little sick and tired

of everybody thinking
I can't handle the job.

I've handled worse than
this stupid little tea party.

[ Chuckling ]

- Any sign of Gary?
- Kind of.

Poor Chett. Gary's trapped
inside his head

- and he doesn't even have a clue.
- Poor Chett?

Poor Gary. How'd this happen?

Gary was in Chett's dream
but when Chett woke up,

no more dream so Gary got
dumped into Chett's conscious mind.

So what do we do?

Our only shot is to
modify the dream chair.

Then we'll rescue Gary.
I'll start on the chair.

See if you can make
contact with Gary.

Tell him to hang tight.
I'll have him out soon.

Hey, Chett,
ready for the big day?

[ Belching ]

Good one.
Caught me with my mouth open.

- Have you seen... Gary.
- No...

I haven't but I have
seen the future

and you're in for some pain.

Ah!

Oh! Hey. What the...?

- Never mind.
- Gary? Is that you?

Are you in there?

Don't worry. Lisa has a plan.

We'll have you out soon.

If you understand,
give me a sign.

What are you looking at?

May I... clear your soiled
cups and plates?

That's right.
Don't make eye contact with me.

I'm just the dirty little busboy
doing his dirty little job.

- Donnelly, table seven needs water.
- Right, Mr. Brinkman. Table seven.

- Uh, what's the joke, Chett?
- No joke.

Just equalizing the
pressure in my sinuses.

- And my ears.
- You making fun of me?

No, sir. Absolutely not, sir.

Excuse me, sir.

Oh! What the devil's
happening to me?

It's just a job.
Don't let it stress you out.

You're strong enough,
you're tough enough...

GARY: ...and doggone it,
people like you.

Huh?

Huh?!

- Hiya, Chett.
- [ Gasps ]

Yeah. How do you think I feel?

This is... no way.
You got to be kidding me.

- You're not real.
- Relax.

I'll be gone soon but first,
since I'm stuck here

we're going to have a little fun.

- It's payback time, Chett.
- Payback?

Remember when you
dunked me in paint?

It was a joke!

Who could forget
all those pink bellies?

[ Yelling ]

And your favorite Wyatt t*rture--

The nipple twister.

[ Yelling ]

You're the devil, aren't you?

The devil in the form
of Gary Wallace!

- Nope. Just Gary Wallace.
- [ Yelling ]

[ Loud Hissing ]

Lisa, what's taking so long?

She's not ready. I need more time.

Or what? The dilithium
crystals are going to blow?

Hand me the
triangulating bore probe.

- Huh?
- The red thing.

And don't drop it or
you'll trigger an ice age.

Donnelly, where have you been?

I need you out there
bussing tables.

I'm on it.

- Get going.
- I'm trying.

I can't seem to move my feet.

I need to move my feet.

Make it stop!

Chett. Chett.

- Chett, are you on medication?
- Nope.

Just keeping the
customers happy.

I swear, as soon as I finish
my dance I'm bussing tables.

Oh. Whoa-oh!

Mr. Brinkman, please
don't fire me

for what I'm about to do.
I want my job.

I need my job.
Oh, this isn't me!

Well, whoever you are,
you're fired.

GARY: Going on a road trip?

- Come on, Chett, talk to me.
- I'm lonely.

You don't exist. You're
just some freak figment

of my imagination brought on
by all this pressure I'm under.

"Get a job, get a life."
Is it any wonder I've snapped?

You hated that job.
I did you a favor.

Yeah. You're probably right.

Sooner or later I would have
gotten fired on my own.

- I'm no good. I'm a loser.
- You're pathetic.

Yeah. That too.

So... you just going
to leave home?

I have no choice.

It's either leave
or be thrown out.

Okay, it worked. I've suspended
Chett's conscious mind.

We should be able
to speak to Gary now.

Gary? Can you hear me? Gary?!

Whoa. I'm stuck
in his head, not deaf.

We fixed the dream chair.

We should be able
to get you out now.

No. Not yet.

- What?
- I'm not ready.

What are you doing,
looking for shrapnel?

Gary, you have to come out.
If you stay much longer

you'll become part of
Chett's brain-- permanently.

Why didn't you say
something earlier?

If I told you every time
your lives were in danger

- we'd never get out.
- I just need a few more minutes.

There's something
I got to do for Chett.

Hurry. You don't have much time.

Chett. We need to talk.

I'm not talking to you.

Good. Then shut up and listen.

You can't leave. Your dad
doesn't care than you lost your job.

He just wants to
see you do something.

Like what? Be a busboy?

Nah. Dad's right.
I'm a waste case.

Talking to a toaster.

Chett?
Why aren't you at work?

I got fired. Guess I'm not
cut out to steam milk.

Thought we had
an agreement, Chett.

Do you have anything
to say to me?

Yeah.

I'll send you a check
for the wheat thins.

Let... me... go.

It's a test, man.

He just wants to know
you have to plan.

You know--
goals, ambitions.

Son, is there... something
else you want to say?

- No.
- Get back there.

Maybe.

Got a plan?

- He's never go for it anyway.
- Just give it a chance.

Dad, I don't want to
work in a coffeehouse.

All right, great.

What do you propose
to do with your life?

Well, back in the corps
I scored perfect on

infiltration and annihilation
and I've been thinking.

There's this group in Bolivia
called the america force.

It hunts down troublemakers
and neutralizes them.

It's fully funded
by the C.I.A.

they've got really cool
uniforms and a full dental plan.

- I want to join up.
- Bolivia?

They only ask for
a 12-year commitment.

But there's more.

After you've done your time

there's a career
placement program.

Most wind up in the
U.S. postal service.

Great. B-b-but...

there may be other options
that you can explore

but you need to
take you time.

Uh, why rush into things?
Bolivia will always be there.

Then... I can stay?

As long as I know
you're exploring your options.

[ Nervous Chuckle ]

You can let go now, Chett.

Uh... no, I can't.

All right, operation resuce
Gary is underway.

This time, I'm coming back
with my best friend

or I'm not coming back at all.

Gary, you made it.
Where's Wyatt?

Hey, the chair only seat four.

[ Giggling ]