06x17 - Choosin' for a Bruisin

[bunniefuu]

[Chris]: Last time
on Total Drama Island...

Things got a little sticky
as teams tried to cross
the island while covered in sap.

And while some did
surprisingly well...

...others got Glued-eus
to the Maximus.

Millie apologized to Damien
for sending him down
the wrong slide

and the two became
friends again!

But thanks to a mouthful
of sap,

Damien couldn't tell anyone
it happened,

and Millie
was voted off.

Which sap will be
going home today?

You'll only find out
here on

Total...

Drama...

Island!

♪ Hey what's up
I'm here to slay ♪

♪ Don't know why the rest
even bother to stay ♪

♪ I know the game
And I brought the skill ♪

♪ Crushing players' dreams
Yeah, you know the drill ♪

♪ I wanna be
I wanna be ♪

♪ I wanna be famous ♪♪

- Look, I'm sorry, okay?

I didn't know MK and Julia
were gonna cheat like that.

- M'kay.

- Raj, I know you wanna
"play the right way".

But! If MK didn't spray you,
you'd still be stuck to Wayne.

[sighing]
- I guess... Just...

Promise we'll play
fair from now on.

- Hey, cool guys.

Headin' to the Intern Meeting
for some more cheatin'! Heh.

Catch ya later!
- Nice!

Bring us back
an easy win!

Sorry.
That was reflex.

[grunting]

- Hey! No off days, huh?

- Ha. Nope.

But more importantly,
you doin' okay?

I know I'm not Millie, but...

I'm here if you need me.

Straight up?
I'm glad Millie's gone.

Yeah, we're down a player,
but with her outta the picture,

Priya will need a new alliance

and I'll do what I gotta do
to make sure that alliance...

is me.

[laughing nervously]

- Big arms, big hug.

[grunting]

- Hey, Axe--

Owww...

- Oh crud.
Don't sneak up on me, man.

At survival camp, I was voted
"most likely to make you
regret stuff".

- Yep.
Clearly my fault.

- Let me help you with that.

[bones cracking]
- Ow! Thanks.

Okay, listen...
I just--

See, the thing is--
I'm like, way into you...
or whatever.

- Oh. Awkward.
I don't think you're my type.

Sorry.

[emotional music]

- Feels like my heart
just barfed inside my chest.

- Well? What's the challenge?!

I got... nothing.

Chris just sent the interns
to town to buy a cordless
hairdryer.

That was the whole meeting!
Total waste of a mustache.

- Nice.
We'll play it fair n' square.

- We don't wanna play fair,
we wanna win.

- But...
can't we do both?

[Chris]: Campers, report to
your next painful challenge.

- Ppp...painful?

- Welcome to "Know Your Enemy"!

Each team has a bridge with an
orange A-side and a blue B-side.

To make it across,
teams must correctly answer
questions with an A OR B answer.

- What kinds of questions
are they?

- So glad you asked.

Maybe you recall answering
a series of "Would You Rather"
questions last season.

[all]: Oh, yeah...

- Well, we turned those
pointless, invasive,
embarrassing questions

into a challenge!

So, you'll see a video of
an opposing team member

being asked a question,
you guess their answer

and step forward carefully.

First team to get a member
to the other side wins immunity.

- Boom! Perfect.

I was worried because everyone
but me seems to be
in alliances,

so I needed a challenge
I could crush,

and this is it!

Cause I know people.

- I know I'm gonna regret
askin', but what happens
if we guess wrong?

- You just stop crossing
the bridge.
- Oh!

[laughing nervously]
- Because a trap door opens
beneath you.

And you plummet 40 feet!

Into a pool full of wolverines.

- Why are they wearing
life jackets?

- Um, for safety?

And the lifeguard on duty
is completely unqualified.

- Zero chance I'm goin'
in that tank.

- But you've got
the skimmer, right?

[groans]

Skunk Butt! You won last time,
so you're up first!

- Woo! Playin'
the right way today!

Let's get it!

[beep]

- Where should I be looking?
At you or at the camera?

[Chris]: Don't be weird,
just look at me.
Here we go.

Damien, would you rather...

A] camp in a grave yard for
a month,

or B] go without toilet paper
for a week.

Raj: Orange for A,
or Blue for B.

- A! Damien won't go
a week without toilet paper;

he's not Ripper!

[groaning in disgust]

- Gotta go B.
[buzzer]

- What?!

[screaming]

[both]: Raj!

[screaming in pain]

- Hold on! You'd rather go
wipe free for a week?

Why?!
- I can wash my butt,

there's nothing I can do
about a haunting!

- Legit. Grossest. Thing. Ever.

[coughing]

- Rat Face, you're up!

- Zee! I'm a total
people person!

So just step where I tell you
and don't think, okay?

- Not thinking is my superpower.

- You heard her, Zee!
Step where Emma says!

[Chris]: Bowie,
would you rather...

A] Have to wear clown makeup
for a year,

or B] have your entire
Direct Message history
made public?

- It's B! There is no way Bowie
would dress like a clown!

- I'll go with A.
[buzzer]

- Whoa.
[screaming]

It's better for us all
if my DMs stay private.

[screaming in pain]

- Argh.
I messed that one up...

But don't worry!
I got this.

- Skunk Butt!

You're up next.

Priya, would you rather...

A] lose the passwords to
all your devices every day

or B] spend the entire
next school year
in a hot dog costume?

- I think A.

- B!
[buzzer]

[screaming]

- Hot dog is 100%
the right call.

I hate resetting passwords.

- Right? Thank you.

- Rat Faces, next question.

Wayne, would you rather be...

A] hockey superstar
Gord LaFleur

or B] the puck that scored
the game-winning goal
in the 1988 Cup Finals?

- A! Michelle, it's for sure A!

- That's a tap in bro!
B all day!

[buzzer]
- Ugh.

Take that, Hollywood!
- Whoa.

- Hey, I bet the path across
is already locked in.

I'll go next and when I fall,

I'll sneak off
to the production trailer

and get the answers.
- Do it.

- Wait! Chris will know
something's up

if you're just shouting out
all the right answers.

- Oh! We'll use hot sign!

- What's that?

- Ignore the answers I shout,

just listen to how many times
I shout it.

Odd number of shouts means
the answer is A.

Even number means B.

- That's... brilliant.

- I know.
I said it.

- Awww! If MK's brain
drove a cool car, I'd date it.

- I'm next!

[Chris]: Michelle,
would you rather...

A] slide naked down a ski hill,

or B] spend a day at a wave
pool that uses barf
instead of water?

- B.

[ding!]

- That is disgusting.

And correct!
Which means MK,
you're still up.

Zee, would you rather eat...

A] popcorn that tastes
like poop,

or B] poop that tastes
like popcorn?

- Umm... A?

- Okay... B?

[buzzer]

[screaming]

[screaming]

- Yeah, it's poop,
but it tastes like popcorn.

So, close your eyes, dudes.

- Rat Face, you're up.

- Don't worry, I've got this!

No seriously, just i,
listen to me! I know people!

I am a people person!

- Is she, though?

- She seems super confident.

Let's give her another shot.

Okay, Emma.
I hate wolverines...

So you better not mess this up.

[gulping]

- Rat Faces, get ready
for your next question.

Scary Girl, would you rather...

A] take truth serum and
be questioned by Chef

or
B] only be able to eat Chef's
cooking for a whole year?

- Okay.
Nobody likes Chef's cooking,

but I can't imagine Scary Girl
wants anyone knowing

what's going on in her head.
It's B! 100 percent.

B, Axel, B!

- You better be right.

- I pick A.
[buzzer]

[screaming]

No skeletons in my closet.
I mean, there are.

But only cause I live
at a funeral home.

[sighing]
S- I miss that weirdo.

Speaking of...
anybody know where MK is?

[heavy music]

- Oh, yeah! MK has
expl*sive diarrhea.

- EW! TMI! You coulda just said
"she's gone to the bathroom".

Skunk Butt's, next question.

Emma, would you rather...

A] eat a bowl
of toenail clippings,

or B] not shower
for a month?

- I got a good feeling
that it's A.

- Uh, I think I'd do A.
[ding!]

[cheering]

- Toenails? Toenails?!

- What? I already eat
my finger nails.
Toes are just feet fingers...

- Moving on!

Millie, would you rather...

A] Eat two hundred lemons,

or B] Wrestle your
best friends grandpa?

- Millie and me are smart.
Gramps is going down! B!

- For sure B.
[ding!]

[cheering]

- Correct! Skunk Butt grows
their lead! Next question!

Caleb, would you rather...

A] eat pudding from
an angry gorilla's arm pit,

or B] jump from a plane
with a parachute packed
by your ex?

- Guys like me and Caleb leave
a lot of angry ex-girlfriends...

A!

- B.
[buzzer]

- Whoa!
[screaming]

- That's a lot of trust
for an ex.

- Well I've dated, but I've only
ever had one girlfriend.

- For real?
- Yup. Andrea Willis.

We were both five years old.

She broke up with me cause
I wouldn't let her try
my skipping rope.

- But how've you had
one girlfriend?

I'm not saying I've had
a lot of boyfriends!

I! Have! Not!

So...

We have something in common.

- I bet once we start spending
more time together,

we'll find out
we have a lot of things
in common.

- "Once we start spending
more time together"?

That was flirting, right?
That had to be flirting.

- Strongest alliance ev-ah!

- Okay, I'm gonna go next!

I'm due!
- What?

Priya no! I think Emma's proven

that she clearly isn't
a "people person".

She can't stop making out
with a guy

who cut her brakes
and we think she's a good judge
of character!?

- Okay, cool it, you two!

We're going all in on Emma!

She's our key to victory!
But not on the bridge.

We need you to stand over here.

In fact, I want you covering
your ears after the question
too.

That way, you can stay
totally focused!

[gasping]
- You're right! Focused.

- Priya must have a plan.
- She better.

- Okay. Whatever Emma says,
pick the opposite.

- Alright Chris, let's do this.

- Next question
for team Rat Face.

Raj, would you rather...

A] fight 1 bear,
or B] 100 rabid kittens?

- Raj would fight the bear! A!

It's A!

- B.

- I gotta go B.
[ding!]

[sighing in relief]

- Sure, fighting bears is cool,

but if I fought
a hundred kittens,

I could finally try the...

[both]: ...Cyclone Spin Cycle!

[motor sound]

- Emma! You did it!

- I did it? We got one right?

- Yeah! And now we roll!

- I'm comin', guys...

Just hope I'm not too late.

Ugh, I hate running.

[ding!]

- Correct again!

- Yes!

[cheering]

- Ugh! Where is MK?

[gasping]
- Look!

- Only two more to go
for immunity!

- You're crushing it,
Emma, dude!

Keep yelling out
the wrong answers

so Caleb
knows where to step.

- Haha! Thanks, Zee! Wait--

What?!
- Zee!

[gasping]
- Are you serious?

Of all of the rotten--

Okay, that's it! i am done!

- What do you mean, "done"?

- Arh! I am not answering
any more questions!

Good luck, jerks!

- Ohhh boy.

- Okay, Rat Face! Next question!

MK, would you rather...

A] give up texting
for five years,

or B] lose your bathing suit
at a crowded wave pool.

- Emma, please...?

- Nope!

- I guess I'll go with A.

- Walking outta the water naked
would bite,

but having to call people?

Like a caveman?
Ha! No thanks.

B.
[buzzer]

[screaming]
- Nooo!

[splash!]

- Remember, odd number of shouts
means A,

even means B.
So go win it for us.

- Next question
for team Skunk Butt.

Axel, would you rather be...

A] dirt poor but celebrated
as a great poet,

or B] a filthy rich lawyer
who puts guilty criminals
back on the street?

- I'd rob a bank for sure
if it meant I'd be debriefed
by that lawyer.

- Bowie! It's B! Pick B!

It's gotta be B!

- I'm actually super
into poetry.

- Poetry?

A.
[ding!]

- Yeah!
[cheering]

- I was worried Bowie
and the girls

might be cheating,
but MK told him to pick B
and he picked A.

So they can't be cheating.
Heh. Phew!

[groaning]
- I promised Raj
I wouldn't cheat,

but Rat Face is almost across!
I have no choice!

Okay, keep 'em comin', Chris!

I could do this all day!

- Next.

[rhythmic music]

[ding!]

[ding!]

[ding!]

- One more correct answer
and Skunk Butt wins,

and Bowie is on a seemingly
impossible hot streak.

[chuckling]
- Just lucky, I guess.

[Chris]: Priya,
would you rather...

A] be genetically merged
with a warthog

or B] have Chris McLean
as your dad?

- A, Bowie! Pick A!

- Thanks, MK, but I think
I'm gonna go with my gut
on this one...

- Definitely A.
[buzzer]

[screaming]

[groaning]

- I had to give him
the wrong answer.

- Yeah, Chris was getting
suspicious.

- And Julia really wanted
to see Bowie fall.

- Um! I really did.

- Priya, now that you know me
better, would your answer be--

- I'd still pick the warthog.

- Fair enough. Okay!

Skunk Butt has
no trap doors left,

so they automatically
win immunity if team Rat Face

gets another answer wrong.

Last chance Rat Faces,
let's do this.

- Well? You heard him.

Last chance.

- Whatever.

- I'm serious, Emma.
- What gives?!

- This is your one shot left
to save the team.

So swallow your pride,
trust your terrible,

terrible instincts,
and win us immunity.

- But... you want me
to pick the opposite
of what I think!

- Exactly.

- Okay.
Let's win this challenge.

- Priya, no!

What are you doing?

- It's okay!
Emma's gonna go
against her gut!

- Ohh!
- Yes! Your gut is terrible!

- Your instincts stink!

[gasping]

- No.
- Chase, would you rather...

A] apologize for something you
aren't sorry for,

or B] go bald by the time
you're 23?

- Oh...
Tough one.

- Okay, yes,
Chase has great hair.

He did just apologize for--

- Emma! Don't think!
Listen to your gut

and then pick the opposite!

- Priya, please!
I know this one is B!

Fight it, Emma!
Trust that your gut is wrong!

- But-- Okay...

I'll pick A.

- This could be it.
Let's see.

[groaning]
Oh man...if I were bald...

I'd be just as awesome!
B, baby!

[buzzer, screaming]

- Nooo!

- Not the face! Chef, help!

- Skunk butt wins immunity!

[cheering]

- You were awesome
up there!

Like, you almost went
coast-to-coast!

And best of all,
you played fair,

just like you said
you would!

- Ugh. Life was so much easier
when lying was profitable
and fun.

[intriguing music]

- Rat Face.
Back again, huh?
Chef, let 'em have it.

- Emma.
First you trusted
your gut, and that was bad.

Then it was good.
Then you didn't trust
your gut and it was bad again.

- Yeah.

- Axel.
- What?

- I find it weird
that you like poetry.

That's all.
And finally, Priya.

- What? Me?!

- You messed with Emma's head
and ignored her

when she told you
she knew that last answer.

That was your call.

- A marshmallow means
you are safe.

Michelle.

Axel.

Damien.

Zee.

Caleb.

- Please, not Priya.

I'm just getting this alliance
off the ground!

- No, this can't be
how I go out!

- And the final marshmallow
goes to...

[dramatic music]

...Priya!

[sighing in relief]

Emma, you've been eliminated.

Please follow me
to the dock of shame.

- Aw! I really thought
I had a chance this season.

Guess I'll have to go back
to earning millions of dollars

recording ten second
dance routines on my phone.

- Take her away!

Well, that ends another episode

and surprisingly, no one died.

[speaker screeching]
- Testing.

Testing.
- Is that... Ripper?

- I'd like to read an original
poem of love

to one lucky
lady-person.

- Oh, this is gonna be good.

- On eagle wings,
in zombie brains;

a pool of tears,
that never drains.

Even cheeks squeezed tight,

could not contain;
a sweet smell of love...

my heart's methane.

So I ask you, Axel,

honest, true and plain,

can I rock your world...

like a hurricane?

- This is gonna be bad.

- Yeah, can we show
a decapitation,

or is that gonna be
a problem?

[dramatic music]

[joyful music]

- Oh! That is an image
that'll haunt my dreams.

But I'll still
see you next time on

Total

Drama

Island!