What do you think, Theodore?
He looks like a real live one.
Come on.
All right!
Get him with the rope!
- Huh?
- Rope him!
Well, throw it!
Maybe, we can
head him off at the pass.
Mm-hm.
Maybe, we'll do
a little better this time.
Two of diamonds.
- Jack of diamonds.
- How about this?
- Three of diamonds.
- Oh.
Queen of diamonds.
Ace of diamonds.
Ten of hearts.
Well, how proud are you
of that ace, Leonard?
- Ace bets a dollar.
- A dollar.
There was a time around here...
when a jack high was
worth a poke of gold.
- I'm in.
- Me too.
- I'm in.
- I'm folding.
Well, I'm in.
What's matter?
Did the mines dry up?
Quake of '65 pinched off the veins.
But, the quake we had two years ago
finished us off for good.
Hasn't been 10 cents worth of gold
taken out of Quake City since.
- Ace, ten is still you, Leonard.
- Bet a dollar.
I was wondering about
that name, "Quake City"?
When you build a town
on top of the Calaveras Fault,
you can figure to get
shook up once in a while.
- Ten.
- Me too. How's that?
Ain't that bad, Homer.
We've still got two fine saloons,
our own theater,
and the only hook and ladder
this side of Chicago.
Come on...
You planning to settle
down here, Mr. Donavan?
No, no, no. I'm working
my way to New Orleans.
As soon as I get a big enough stake,
I'm gonna open up my own place.
First class, too.
Red carpets,
crystal chandeliers from Europe,
two roulette tables.
- No, no.
- Good evening, gents.
- Oh.
- Homer.
If you need a haircut, Wintle,
my barbershop's closed.
If you're looking to sue somebody,
my court's open every second Tuesday.
If you want the sheriff,
I'm playing' poker.
Deuces bet a dollar.
No, judge.
It's just that I'm leaving
for San Francisco tonight.
San Francisco's loss
is Quake City's gain.
Leonard?
The trouble is that I'm expecting
some valuables on tomorrow's stage,
and I can't be here
to pick them up.
Me neither.
Oh. Yes.
Mm.
Mayor Sharpe?
Got a council meeting tomorrow.
- I'm in.
- What kind of valuables, John?
Well, bless my suspender buttons.
Donavan!
I haven't seen you since, uh--
- Santa Fe?
- Right.
When you sold me
the marshal's horse?
Right.
I was just funning, Donavan.
The marshal wasn't amused.
Well, now, old friend, uh...
maybe, I can make it up to you.
Two pairs bets two dollars.
Hey, like I say.
I'm expecting valuables on the stage.
- I'm in.
- Like what?
Oh, things a person wouldn't
leave lying around...
without somebody responsible,
like yourself,
to keep an eye on.
There's a game going on, Wintle.
There's your two,
and raise you five.
Oh, now, you couldn't have hit
an inside straight again.
- I'll call you.
- I'm out.
If you'll claim them for me,
I'll make it worth your while.
Besides repaying what I charged you
for the marshal's horse.
The mayor raised five.
It's just till I come back, Donavan.
- Well, you in or not?
- Um...
Here's five on account
if you can use it.
I don't know how
you came by five dollars,
but I'll apply it to
your loan at the bank.
- It's a deal?
- It's a deal.
I'm in.
Thanks, Donavan.
Thanks!
- You won't forget?
- I won't forget.
- Thanks!
- All right, let's see them.
- Hit it again!
- Oh.
I don't believe that.
Welcome to Quake City,
Mr. Donavan.
Looks like luck's against you.
Well, there's one
good thing about luck,
it always changes.
And I've got a feeling that
mine is just around the corner.
Again?
Whoa!
Whoa!
♪ Well, they saddled up in Boston ♪
♪ Still wet behind the ears ♪
♪ And made their way
across the wild frontier ♪
♪ Hee-Haw ♪
♪ As they sought their fame and fortune ♪
♪ The legend of them sprang ♪
♪ And they soon became
the Apple Dumpling g*ng ♪
♪ And they called them
the Apple Dumpling g*ng ♪
♪ Hee-Haw ♪
♪ Hee-Haw ♪
♪ It wasn't long they'd been gone ♪
♪ From the eastern shore ♪
♪ And people knew their names
from far and near ♪
♪ Far, near ♪
♪ Well, they sure shook up Quake City ♪
♪ Some folks was out to hang ♪
♪ All the riders of
the Apple Dumpling g*ng ♪
♪ And they called them
the Apple Dumpling g*ng ♪
♪ It wasn't Jesse James
or old Black Bart ♪
♪ For whom the posses rode ♪
♪ Even though there was
a price upon their heads ♪
♪ It was Celia, Bobby and Clovis ♪
♪ The town folks up and sang ♪
♪ About the threesome called
the Apple Dumpling g*ng ♪
♪ And they called them
the Apple Dumpling g*ng ♪
♪ And they called them
the Apple Dumpling g*ng ♪
Well, here it is, folks,
Quake City.
Much obliged, Ralph.
Hotel's across the street.
You can get something
to eat there,
or at the Hard Times Café.
And take your stuff with you.
There's two bits charged
for packages stored overnight.
You got anything broken in transit,
report it to the ticket office
tomorrow morning at 5:00.
Uh, excuse me.
Morning, Dusty.
My weeklies come?
Morning, Sheriff.
Yeah, they're in the mail pouch.
Excuse me, but do you have
something for John Wintle?
- Right in front of you.
- Oh, thank you.
Not there "in front of you".
There "in front of you".
- Sign here.
- For what?
- Ain't you claiming them for wintle?
- I am not.
Last night, you said you was.
Took five dollars
in advance as I recall.
Yes, but, uh,
but I was to pick up
some valuables.
But, uh,
not a bunch of
runny-nosed kids.
They're in good shape, mister,
just as good as when I got them.
- Now, sign here.
- Uh, pardon me.
May I speak to anyone in authority?
How about the founder
and president of the line?
Perfect.
Pa? You wanna hear
this fellow out?
Colonel T.R. Clydesdale,
at your service, sir.
Well, uh, Colonel Clydesdale, sir.
Uh,
there appears to be...
uh, well, an unfortunate
misunderstanding about the children.
- You see, I, I didn't know--
- To cut through the fat,
this saddle blanket tinhorn agreed
to pick up these kids for John Wintle,
and now he's trying
to weasel out of it.
Magnolia!
Magnolia?
And where are the legal
guardians of these, uh, waifs?
Their folks passed away back East,
it's what I get from them.
They've been shipped
out here to John Wintle.
He's their second uncle,
or something.
And where is John Wintle?
Halfway to San Francisco,
I'd say.
All I know is, the stage made
delivery to the consignee...
or his agent, and that
seems to be you, mister.
What you do with them
is your business.
That argument wouldn't
hold up in any court of law,
- and you know it.
- It would in my court.
And I'm the law around here.
But, but, Sheriff, look.
Sheriff,
I didn't know
they were children.
Now, I'm not a family man.
Mister, I gotta go.
Yeah, just, just, just as soon as
we get this straightened out.
Now, uh, Sheriff, I, uh...
I have no, I have
no place to keep them.
Wintle's got a shack
on the edge of town.
Mister, I gotta go bad!
She can't wait too long,
mister.
Take my word for that.
It might be, uh,
prudent to, uh resolve......
resolve the more imminent
problem, uh, forthwith.
All right. Fine.
Come on. Okay, let's go.
Oh, where, where, where
did you say Wintle's shack was?
Well, you go to the edge of town,
turn left, and just beyond
that old pile of shoring timbers--
Well, I'll, I'll show you.
Hey!
Oh, uh, I'll be right back.
Just hold on.
- What?
- Right here.
Oh.
Magnolia?
Uh, meanwhile,
rest assured that the Butterfly
Stage and Freight Company...
will make every endeavor...
to satisfy...
uh, the problem
to the ultimate, uh,
satisfaction of all
concerned parties.
Uh--
"Unfortunately, Mr. Bradley's
lingering illness left him destitute,
"and there are no monies
left in the estate.
"However, Mr. Bradley felt...
"that revenues from his share
of the Commodore Mine...
"would more than provide for the care
and well-being of his children."
I guess when Wintle got this,
he didn't want to be
saddled with the kids,
so he decided on
a change of scenery.
Anything would be an improvement.
Yeah, well, now,
the way that I see it,
until we know,
one way or the other,
uh, exactly what
Wintle had in mind,
the children are wards
of this town, right?
Wrong.
There is no funds nor facilities
for orphans in Quake City.
Well, you don't expect me...
- to be able to take care--
- Donavan!
This is just a half-portion of a town,
but we do have certain
what you might call rules to live by.
- Well, I--
- You don't jump another man's claim.
You don't steal his wife,
woman, or whiskey.
You don't strike
a bargain and then,
entertain second thoughts
about the matter.
Any one of these offenses
can make you...
the exalted guest of honor
at a hemp party.
- Uh, hemp--
- No, I'd say you'd...
best keep these youngsters...
or provide for their safekeeping.
Well,
it's time I was getting back
to my barbershop.
Oh, and, uh, Donavan,
I wouldn't go on no long rides
if I was you.
No. No.
- When are we gonna eat?
- Uh, just, just a little while now.
Oh!
Clovis don't like to be touched.
- Don't he?
- Nope.
- Now what?
- Clovis, now, put it back!
- Come on, you two!
- Clovis, give it to me.
I mean it. No more
playing around the fire.
- Give me it!
- Will you stop?
Now, listen to me.
I don't want any more trou--
Oh! Ow! Oh oh oh!
- Clovis don't like to be--
- I know.
Clovis don't like to be touched.
Give me it, Clovis.
Will you stop?
Give me that.
Let me see what the fuss is about.
"Oh, Commodore Mine,
December 3rd, 1871."
Commodore's our mine now.
Well, it's just an old ore sample.
Is it valuable?
If it was,
it wouldn't be here.
Our dad said, there's gold
in the Commodore Mine.
Everyone says,
there's gold in their mine.
- What's that?
- It's salt pork.
- I think.
- It looks like fat.
Well, whatever it is,
it's dinner.
That's dinner?
That's dinner.
Couldn't you make us
apple dumplings instead?
- No.
- Why not?
Because even if I could
make apple dumplings,
I wouldn't make them
for you or anybody else.
Bobby?
- It's raining on Celia again.
- Then move Celia again!
There's no more
dry places to move her.
Bobby, will you, oh--
No, no, not my salt pork.
What have I done to deserve this?
Who are you talking to?
It doesn't matter.
I don't think he's
listening to me anyway.
Evening.
Had some extra son-of-a-g*n stew.
It was either throw it out
or bring it up here.
Well, it stopped raining.
You know,
it's really amazing.
What is?
The way those kids
settled right down for you.
Well, when you're dead on your feet,
you get your belly full,
you get sleepy.
What's amazing about that?
Oh, you underestimate yourself.
I think I can say
without hesitation...
that was the best son-of-a-g*n
stew that I've ever had.
Really?
Yeah, and you saw the way
the kids polished off their plates.
You know,
I think it's a crime...
that, that someone
with your culinary talent,
well, well, I guess you'd
really have to call it magic,
hasn't a family to share it with.
You trying' to dump
those kids on me,
or you working on something else?
I am merely trying
to point out...
that you have a natural
way with children.
You're barking up
the wrong tree, mister.
My advice to you is,
get yourself a job
and look after your kids.
They're not my kids!
Yes, they are.
Till you find somebody else
to take them off your hands.
Night.
It's dripping on me again.
Oh. Um.
I, uh, I'm very attached
to the little fellas,
but I'm, uh,
I'm a bachelor, you see?
And I'm really in no position
to care for them,
not like you and
your attractive wife could.
I'm sure there must be room here
for three small children.
It would just be until
Mr. Wintle gets back.
Jesus!
Oh, look at that.
- And you...
- Hey! Hey!
- Hey!
- Hey, you!
- Quick! You get out of there!
- Hey!
Get out! Get out!
- Uh, ma'am, I can--
- Oh, get out of the way!
Come on! Come on!
Now, get out of there!
Now, get out!
Why?
Don't get your feet wet.
I'm really very attached
to the little fellas, you see?
But, I'm in no position
to care for them.
Howdy, ma'am.
Good morning.
But they're all healthy specimens,
sound of wind and limb.
They don't eat much.
They'd be a lot
of help around here.
They could-- No!
Ow!
Uh, I can explain about that.
It's, uh, he's the only one
that does that.
You see, he's just
a little sensitive, that's all.
Uh, no, really!
- No, the other ones--
- Come on!
- Ma'am!
- Get out!
Ma'am, that little girl could
help you in the kitchen.
She could wash your dishes and
scrub your personal clothes!
Come on.
Good day, sir. I can see
that you're a man of substance.
I have an interesting proposition
I thought that might--
Ah, the lady of the house.
Kids. Yuck!
The children are
marvelous about parties.
- They love parties themselves.
- Come on.
If you could just--
one small look at them.
Who's that, Mr. Donavan?
President of the garden club.
All right. Come on.
Mr. Donavan!
Look!
Celia, get out of there!
Celia!
Being a family man's
quite a responsibility.
I'm hungry.
Naturally.
Hard Times Café serves a nice lunch.
Thanks!
Come on, kids, come on.
Pair of tens wants the money.
Doggone. I guess
that sure beats ace, queen high.
Well, I'm on my last card too.
Create a lot of places--
All right, you kids find something
to do, and stay out of trouble.
- Where are you going?
- I have a few sheep to fleece.
Ace bets a dollar.
- I'm in.
- Two, deuce.
Jack.
Oh, king.
What's a "millstone"?
I don't know. Why?
Mr. Donavan said,
he doesn't want three millstones...
hanging around
his neck.
I gotta show you where
we're gonna put it inside,
then we won't have
to move it again.
You don't want to move something
as delicate as this twice.
What is it, Bobby?
I don't know.
Ow!
Hey, hey,
get away from there!
Why, this thing's come
halfway across the country,
and I don't want anything
happening to it now!
Get! Get! Get!
All right, let's, let's
move it in now, fellas.
Be real careful now.
Move it in.
Boy! Hey!
Buddy, buddy, hey!
Buddy, buddy, hey!
Child, hey!
What did he say?
I think he's afraid
we'll get his laundry dirty.
What's that up there?
Looks like a mine.
A mine? Is it ours?
Could be.
Let's go see.
Pair of jacks.
No improvement.
Three of hearts.
Five of clubs.
Ace of hearts.
And king of spades.
Kings bet.
- Kings bet ten dollars.
- I'm in for ten.
- I'm in.
- I'm in.
Now, there's your ten,
and I'll raise you twenty.
- Twenty?
- Oh.
- I don't believe you got them.
- Cost you 20 to find out.
- That's kills me.
- I'm in.
- Now, there's a man from Missouri.
- I'm out.
- I fold.
- All right, let's see them.
Well, three jacks.
- Three jacks?
- Three jacks?
Uh, another round
for the gentlemen, please.
I believe I've also
won the, uh, the deal.
- Sure did.
- All right, Donavan.
- Just deal.
- Wow!
How much money you figure
that dude's got in front of him?
- About 500.
- 500?
Wow!
You know, that'd be, uh...
- that's 200 apiece.
- Mm-hm.
I told you he was
a real live one, didn't I?
Right.
All right, now,
as soon as he leaves,
we jump him, right?
In broad daylight?
We get him when the time is right.
Let's get out of here before
he starts getting suspicious.
Two dollars.
Okay, I'm in for two dollars.
- Okay.
- And the pot is right.
So, a pair of sixes,
four to the deuce,
a pair of ladies,
jack to the three,
ten to the four,
and a jack to the six.
Look, it's a little train.
It's not a train, Celia.
What is it?
It's a cart to haul dirt.
This isn't our mine at all.
It's the Moonridge Number 2.
- Hey!
- All aboard!
Come on, now.
Get out of there!
Come on, Clovis.
You and Celia,
get out of there!
Put the brake on!
It's stuck!
Whoa!
Whoa!
Duck!
Ow!
- Look out, Bobby!
- I can't steer it.
Oh-oh!
- Stop the train, Bobby!
- I can't. Hang on, Celia!
Uh-oh!
- Oh, whoa!
- Whoa!
We're coming to a fence.
Get down!
Whoa!
Move it, move it, move it!
Get the sheriff!
♪ It's so much fun ♪
♪ It's no pity ♪
♪ Taking suckers in Quake City ♪
♪ Doo-dah ♪
♪ Doo-dah ♪
That's him!
They're his kids!
- Don't bother putting that away, mister.
- Now, just one minute!
Now, one mirror, $300.
What are you talking about?
- I was in there, play--
- One melodeon.
- I don't own a melodeon.
- You do now.
- How about my chickens?
- How many were there?
Why do we have
to go to bed so early?
Because if you're asleep,
you just might
stay out of trouble.
- What's that?
- That...
is a cherished token
of a lady's affection.
I'm sure you'll understand, Belle.
You're gonna sell it?
I might raise a little
investment capital on it,
should the need arise.
If you'd go get the gold
in the commodore mine,
you could keep the cherished
token of a lady's affection.
There is no gold
in that hole in the ground.
If there was, someone would
have found it years ago.
And I don't have to answer
to three whelps...
who aren't even dry
behind the ears yet.
Mr. Donavan!
- What?
- I gotta go.
- You just went.
- I gotta go again.
That's impossible.
Go to sleep.
I'm gonna have an accident.
All right. Come on.
I like you, Mr. Donavan.
Psst! Hey!
What makes you think that gambler's
gonna come by this way?
Well, he come this way
the last time, didn't he?
Well, that don't mean
he's gonna come by--
Amos, will you stop trying to think?
Now, come on.
Get up on top of that roof.
You know something?
Why do I have to go through this foofaraw
of dropping a bucket on him?
Why don't I just throw down
on him and say, "hand it over"?
And if he just keeps on walking,
then what?
Well then, I'll call to him,
and then I'll start throwing lead.
You know something, Amos?
The lord poured your brains in
with a teaspoon,
and somebody joggled his arm!
I keep trying to tell you,
we ain't got no lead to throw
and no powder to throw it with!
Oh, that's right.
I keep forgetting.
Come on.
This is gonna be easier
than robbing a bird's nest.
- Right.
- Now, you get up on that roof and wait.
I'll give you a hoot-owl call
when he comes.
Hoo-hoo.
That's good.
I'll tell you what.
I'll answer with a whippoorwill.
That's good.
That, that's good!
All right, I got it.
Here it is. I got it.
The hash knife g*ng rides again!
I should have heard
from Jay Gould...
regarding my amalgamation proposal.
Look into that first thing
in the morning, Magnolia.
Yes, Pa.
We'll be needing new equipment,
of course.
Yes, Pa.
Don't you worry about finances,
little lady.
- Leave all that to me.
- Yes, Pa.
Now, I have to stop in here
and see some people, Magnolia.
Yes, Pa.
Good night, Pa.
Where are you off to?
Well, after I drop this
at the harness shop,
I'll head back to the barn and
fix the brake pedal on the stage.
And then, when I'm through with that,
I've got Diablo's teeth to file.
He's not getting much
out of his food lately.
And then, when I'm through with Diablo,
there's that cracked singletree to fix.
Aside from that,
I got a free evening.
Uh-huh. Well, run along
and enjoy yourself, my dear.
Remember, these are
the best years of your life.
Hoo-hoo.
Hoo-hoo!
Achoo!
Huh?
Hoo-hoo!
Yeah, I'm coming.
Hoo-hoo!
Hoo-hoo!
Hoo-hoo.
Hoo-hoo!
Amos!
Uh.
- Evening.
- Evening.
Well,
that's what I call solid comfort.
Yeah, it's very pretty.
- Where are the children?
- Fed and in bed.
You know, I'm not sure,
but I think two men
tried to waylay me.
- What?
- Yeah, back there.
Probably, just Theodore and Amos.
Who are Theodore and Amos?
Used to ride with the Stillwell g*ng.
The Stillwell g*ng? Really?
Till Amos accidentally shot
Stillwell in the leg.
They call themselves
the Hash Knife Outfit now.
Mm.
They're pretty harmless
for the most part.
Mm-hm.
Hey, buy you a drink?
I'm sorry. I, uh--
I just wasn't thinking of you as a wo--
I'm sorry.
Mr. Donavan!
We're going to the mine
to get some gold!
You want to come with us?
Uh, not, not so loud,
and just a little, little bit slower.
- Where are you going?
- To dig some gold out of our mine.
Then, we don't have to eat
biscuits and greens all the time.
Mr. Purvis, in the assay office,
says, it's on Bald Hill.
Will you come with us,
Mr. Donavan, huh?
- No.
- But why?
Because my head hurts,
and because there is no gold
in that hole in the ground.
Our pa said there was.
Then, you go get it.
And I'm going to go
get some sleep.
Sure everything's with
the tail paddle this time.
You know, Leonard,
with the kind of luck you have,
you ought to play
poker for a living...
and have banking as a hobby,
instead of the other way around.
Thank you, friend.
Thank you very much.
Hey, Mr. Donavan,
why does he got your cherished
token of a lady's affection?
Because three deuces beats
aces over eights, that's why.
Don't get in trouble.
Theodore!
Theodore! Theodore!
Go on, Clarice, go hide.
Quick, go on.
- Douse that fire!
- Ah! What?
What's the matter with you?
What are you doing?
- Did you lose your bit of paint?
- There's a posse after us here!
Ah!
- Come on!
- A posse?
- I don't see anybody.
- They're down there, all right.
I saw them.
They're all hiding in the bushes.
- How many?
- I don't know. It was five, six.
Maybe, 20.
And they're all loaded for bear, too.
Got those big, long buffalo r*fles.
- You know something, Amos?
- Hm?
We gotta make a decision.
What?
Does the Hash Knife Outfit
throw in its hand,
- or do we go out in a blaze of glory?
- Right.
Uh, just what do you mean,
"blaze of glory"?
Fighting till the last man's k*lled.
What's it gonna be, partner?
Uh...
You know that jail in Santa Fe
wasn't all that bad, remember?
I say, we go out
clawing and fighting.
Make them pay for our hideout.
What do you say?
Uh,
all right. I'm with you.
You know something, Theodore?
This could be the end
of the trail for us.
Looks that way, Amos.
You know something?
You and me been through
a lot together,
and although I...
climbed your hump,
once in a while, I...
I just couldn't have asked
for a better partner.
If we meet again in that...
big roundup in the sky sometime,
I'm gonna spread
my blanket aside of yours,
just the same as always.
Mister?
We're looking for the Commodore Mine.
Uh, mm, it's, uh, it's, uh,
it's right up the hill there.
Just follow the trail,
it'll take you right to it.
Thanks.
Bye.
Bye.
Amos, that is the most humiliating
thing that's ever happened to me.
I know.
Three bitty kids with shovels
walk right into our hideout,
- get the drop on us.
- I know. I, uh,
- And you burnt my hand, Amos.
- I'm sorry about that.
And you scorched a hole
in my best shirt!
- Well, I can fix that. I--
- No, don't.
Why did you tell me those
three bitty kids was a posse?
Well, I thought I saw them
down there in the bushes.
Oh, you couldn't see through
a barbed wired fence.
- Theodore?
- That head of yours wouldn't hold straw.
- Theodore?
- You couldn't sell hacksaws in a jail.
- What about that big roundup in the sky?
- I don't want to talk about it!
I said I--
I said I--
You said you were gonna
spread your blanket next to mine.
Why don't we dig here?
Because somebody
already did dig here.
You scared?
No. No more than you are.
- I'm not scared.
- Neither am I.
I am.
Bobby?
Come on, a little mouse can't hurt you.
It's just an owl.
This looks like
a pretty good place to dig.
You start over there,
and I'll dig here.
Find any gold yet?
Nope. Did you?
No.
Maybe, there ain't any gold,
like Mr. Donavan said.
Pa said there was.
- Stop shaking it, Celia!
- I'm not shaking it!
It won't stand still!
It's an earthquake!
Let's get out of here!
Follow me!
Bobby?
I gotta go.
Are we trapped?
There must be another way out.
Come on.
Bobby, what's that?
Well, we base our evaluation...
on what the price
of the gold was...
when we checked last.
But the price may have
gone up in the meantime,
in which case, the nugget
could be worth more.
- But, we can--
- The San Francisco Mint...
will give us a receipt
for the nugget.
The cash deposit will remain
in the children's name...
in the Quake City Bank.
Well, I'll leave that end of it to you.
I just want to make sure...
that the children's interests
are well protected.
Ah, Donavan,
don't worry about a thing.
We'll see that that nugget
is well taken care of.
- Can we touch it?
- I'm sorry, ma'am.
That's as close as
we can let you get to it.
It's a piece of cake.
You mean, it ain't gold?
Of course it's gold, stupid.
I mean getting that nugget out
of that bank's gonna be easier...
than falling off a log.
- Oh, boy!
- Act natural.
Don't do nothing to attract attention.
Hey, uh, Theodore.
How are we gonna--
Theodore?
How, uh,
how are we gonna get it
out of that bank?
All right, first we gotta
get ourselves a long ladder,
and we're gonna go in through
the skylight, through the roof.
Then, we gotta get
that nugget out of town.
And I figure if it's worth $87,000,
it ought to, oh, I'd say,
weigh close to--
Let's see,
gold is $15 an ounce.
How many ounces in a pound?
- Uh.
- Are you listening to me, Amos?
- Yeah, uh, yeah, but, uh--
- Yeah, but what?
- Your rear end's on fire, Theodore.
- Oh, thank you.
Ah! Ow!
Why didn't you tell me
my rear end was on fire?
Well, you told me not to do
anything to attract attention.
- You got a match?
- I've got--
Excuse me.
Hello.
Nice day.
Mabel, Stanley, Donavan.
- Hello.
- Hi, Sheriff.
Well, now, this is what I call
"having a party".
Mr. Donavan said,
we can have all
the apple dumplings we want.
Did he? Did he?
Well, that's very generous
of Mr. Donavan.
And he bought me
a new dress, see?
Oh, I think that's the most
beautiful dress I ever saw.
Awful nice kids.
Yes, they are.
You still bound for New Orleans?
Oh, yes. yes.
Well, nothing's
happened to change that.
Of course, uh,
I have a few things I have
to clear up here in town,
and I've gotta make
arrangements for the kids.
Seems a lot of people are anxious...
to take the youngsters
to their bosoms.
They're saying the kids ought
to be made wards of the court,
and for me to give them to some
respectable family around here,
people of substance.
Of course, that'd fit
right into your plans.
You'd be free to go on your way.
Unencumbered.
Unfettered.
Yeah. Yeah.
Fine, fine.
- Who wants them?
- Oh, there's no shortage of applicants.
- There's the little darling.
- Here, let me have the sweet little thing.
- What do you know about children?
- You don't know nothing about the child.
- Let go!
- All right. Are you all right?
All right, ladies.
Ladies, this is a private party!
But, he said I could have her!
Out! Out! Out!
You're all gonna wind up
in the calaboose...
if you don't get out of here.
That'll all be decided
later on at the hearing.
Out! Out!
See what I mean?
They ripped my beautiful dress.
I know.
But, we'll fix it.
Hey.
We'll fix it.
There's got to be
better people in this town.
There's always Miss Clydesdale.
Who's Miss Clydesdale?
- Dusty?
- Mm-hm.
But, she's not married.
That's easy to fix.
Well, who can you get?
- You're not suggesting--
- I'm only suggesting it for the kids.
- I know, but Dusty's--
- Dusty's a fine specimen of womanhood!
I'd seen her get caught
in a cloudburst once,
and I wanna tell you!
Yes, Mr. Donavan.
Please, marry Dusty.
No two people ever got married...
for a more honorable
or worthy cause, Donavan.
Think that over.
Hearing is not till
the day after tomorrow.
Marry Dusty?
If they give us to Mrs. Stockley,
she won't hit us with a stick,
will she?
Why would she
hit you with a stick?
She hits Mr. Stockley with a stick.
And she might get mad if we track
mud in the house or something.
Or forget to comb our hair.
Well, I’m sure
she wouldn't do that.
When Mr. Stockley gets mad,
he uses words
I never heard before.
He's not as mean as Mr. Leach.
Mr. Leach will put you in a sack
and throw you in the river...
if you even talk too much.
Nobody's gonna throw you in the river.
If rowdy Joe Dover got us,
I bet we'd have to sleep in his shed.
Don't worry, Clovis.
If Celia gets pneumonia,
I can take care of her.
We picked these for you,
Mr. Donavan.
So, you won't forget us
when you get to New Orleans.
You can press them in a book,
and they'll keep forever.
Then every time you see one,
you'll remember us
three "widdle" kids.
That you gave away.
Come on, Clovis.
We better do the dishes,
and not bother
Mr. Donavan anymore.
All right!
I'll ask her.
"Three widdle kids"?
Three little swindlers,
you mean.
- Bobby?
- What?
What's "swindlers"?
I don't know.
Okay, come on.
Come on!
As soon as we get
the ladder out of here,
we head straight for the bank.
Amos!
Amos!
- Yeah?
- Ah!
This one's too small.
Get the one on the other side.
I'll go open the door.
It's too long.
We can't get it out this way.
Push it together.
Ah!
You idiot!
You get on that end,
and I'll get on the other.
And then, we'll push it together.
On the count of three.
Get in there and get it out!
It went through the other window.
I'm gonna pull it
all the way through.
Someone's coming.
Howdy.
Evening.
Don't worry.
As soon as
we get across here,
it's gonna be all downhill.
Get back, you cabbage head.
You're gonna bust it.
Sorry.
Mm! Ah!
It's a long way down there,
Theodore.
Well, don't look down!
It's starting to shake!
Don't do that!
Theodore! Theodore!
Don't do that.
- Move it!
- My spur's caught.
- Get up there!
- I am. I'd--
Get off! Get off!
If I didn't think you'd freeze
to death come this winter,
I'd rob this bank myself
and leave you here.
Coming through.
Watch it!
Maybe, you ought to check and
see if the front door's open.
Will you shut up?
Perfect!
It's a great scheme.
Only when it's over,
I'm the deserted wife
left with three kids to mother,
while I watch your south end
disappearing over a hill.
But, you'll be compensated
for any inconvenience,
- any embarrassment.
- I don't want their money.
It's theirs.
They found it.
Agreed.
The only reason
I suggested it...
is that I knew that you...
would provide them
with a good home.
What do you get out of this...
"arrangement"?
A chance to get to New Orleans
before winter sets in.
That all?
Well, I would appreciate it...
if you'd square up a few
of my debts here in town,
but I will repay you
in due time.
And that's all?
Yes.
Oh, now, wait a minute.
Uh,
do you mean...
might I exercise
my husbandly prerogatives?
That's exactly what I mean.
Miss Clydesdale, nothing
could be further from my mind.
This marriage would ensure
a good home for those children.
Nothing more.
I give my word as a gentleman.
It's not the best guarantee
I've ever had.
Well, maybe not.
But, it's the best I have to offer.
So what's it gonna be, Miss Clydesdale?
Are you calling or folding?
All right, I'll,
I'll go along with it.
But, it's not for you.
It's for the kids.
And the sooner you light a shuck
out of this town, the better.
It's gonna be daylight before
we even get in that bank.
Boy, once we get
our hands on that gold,
we're gonna be living like kings.
We'll be shooing those
senoritas off like flies.
Yeah. Well, you just
never mind about that now.
Just make sure this mule
of yours don't get frisky.
Don't you worry about Clarice.
She'll get you up there all right.
- Now you wait for my signal.
- All right.
Are you gonna use
that hooty-owl again?
Now, I answer with a whippoorwill.
No, no. Don't you
remember nothing?
When I give that rope a tug,
then you haul me up.
That's a new one.
Right.
Tug and haul.
Right. Okay.
- Okay.
- No hooty-owl.
Now this time, it's just gonna be
a tug and haul, you got that?
Well, that's it.
Come on, Clarice.
Uh, come on!
Hold it.
Stay right there.
Shh! You're gonna
wake somebody up!
Come over here!
Uh!
I'll help you.
Stay right there.
You all right?
- I told you to wait for my signal!
- Right.
Shh-shh.
- Shh-shh.
- Yeah.
- Shh-shh.
- Go ahead!
Shh-shh.
Yeah. Uh, come on, Clarice.
Come on!
Come on. Get up, Clarice.
Come on, you--
Come on. Get up, Clarice.
Come on. Come on.
You can rest on your patio
when we get to Mexico.
Come on.
Gotta get up now.
Come on. Come on!
Come on!
Mr. Donavan said,
he doesn't want us
wandering around after dark.
- Somebody's coming!
- We're not wandering around.
- We're looking for him.
- Maybe, we should stay home...
- till he gets back.
- He should've been back by now.
Unless, he forgot.
Hi.
Who are you talking to?
Oh.
Hey, you're the man that showed us
how to get to the mine, aren't you?
That's right.
You kids run along now.
We're looking for Mr. Donavan.
Well, I think he went that way.
Why are you standing
on your toes like that?
'Cause I wanna stand on my toes.
Now, get out of here.
Well, you kids go ahead now.
I'm real busy.
Where's your friend?
He'd better be
in another county.
How'd you get up there?
Never mind how I got up here.
You kids should be in bed now.
Get outta here.
Ah!
Bite me!
You ungrateful fleabag you.
How'd you do that?
Anyway, I got here
early this morning...
to draw up the certification papers...
for the nugget
for the San Francisco Mint,
and when I opened up the place,
when I opened up the place,
I got the shock of my life!
- Morning.
- Morning.
You two couldn't take candy
away from a baby...
without coming out
on the short end.
Well, it's not gonna go
so easy on you this time.
Get out of that silly rope,
and stand up.
This court is now in session.
The Honorable Homer McCoy presiding.
Theodore Ogelvie,
Amos Tucker,
you're charged with
attempted bank robbery.
How do you plead?
Guilty or not guilty?
Not guilty?
Guilty!
The wrong one.
This court sentences you
to be hung by the neck until dead.
And I'm fining you an extra
ten bucks for perjury.
Let them out, Leonard.
- Nice going.
- Uh.
Be down to the oak tree
near boot hill...
at 12:00 sharp
for your hanging.
Uh, thank you, Your Honor.
12:00 sharp on that.
You don't thank a man for hanging you,
you leather-brained ignoramus.
And bring your own rope.
- Right. I'll get it.
- Where you going?
- Well, that's the only rope we got.
- Get out of here.
- Well, the hardware's closed.
- Come on, come on, you dummy.
Well, how are you gonna
hang yourself without a rope?
You know, those dummies
are liable to show up.
Well, if they do,
they deserve to be hung.
I just want to get them
out of this town once and for all.
Sooner that gold's out of this bank
and in the San Francisco Mint, the better.
A lot of people are out
to get that nugget.
Stillwell, we've been sitting on
this mountain for two days now.
Staring at a bank through a spyglass
ain't gonna get us no richer.
You worried about that sheriff?
Any time you got one of them
down-home sheriffs,
you always got
a town full of vigilantes.
We could be walking into
a real hornet's nest.
We got to get
the gold sometime.
Oh, we're gonna get it.
I never rode no 200 miles
just to look at the scenery.
Dang!
Your leg cutting up again?
Yeah, it always acts up on me...
every time the weather changes.
I'll tell you one thing sure.
If I ever get in sh**ting distance
of that doggone Amos Tucker,
he's gonna have windows
where his ears was.
Uh, Homer?
Can we, uh, talk with you?
As barber, sheriff,
or Justice of the peace?
Justice of the peace.
That's two bits.
But, I only got half a shave!
A whole shave's four bits.
Now, git before
I fine you for loitering.
- Git, git, git, git.
- All right, all right.
I'll see you next Tuesday.
Dusty?
You're a willing party to this union?
Just wanna make sure they get
a square deal and a good home.
I never teamed two more
unlikely prospects.
You go together like
ice cream and whiskey.
But, I guess
you'd be man and wife,
same as regular people,
and nobody could say different.
Now, you kids just make
yourselves comfortable.
Did you want it complete
with the trimmings,
love, honor, and cherish,
and all that?
- Kind of like to hear it anyway.
- Well, fine.
Uh, well, let's
just get it over with.
You got a ring?
No.
More legal with a ring.
You hold this till I tell you.
Was you gonna keep your hats on?
You take her, Donavan?
Yes!
Do you take him, Dusty?
I do.
Uh, the ring.
Give it to Mr. Donavan.
Powers invested in me,
the state of California,
county of Tulare,
I pronounce you hitched.
It ain't necessary for you to kiss
if you don't want to,
but you ought to,
at least, shake on it.
Well, that's it. I generally get
two dollars about this point.
Pay you back.
Uh, since you two don't seem
to have no immediate plans,
- I'm buying.
- Oh, good, good.
Oh, Dusty, would you mind, uh,
just keeping an eye
on the kids for awhile?
Might as well get used to it.
Come on, let's have
our own celebration.
How come Mr. Donavan's going that way,
and we're going this way?
Kind of hard to explain.
That all then, Miss Cole?
All right. $4.62.
I'll put it right here on your bill.
You can each have a licorice whip
and one jelly bean.
But, just one.
- Morning, Dusty.
- Mr. Purvey.
Uh, if you're here for those grain bags,
they didn't come in yet.
I have to get boots
and jackets for the kids.
Oh, well, here, we'll look
them up in the catalogue.
I see somebody bought the bed.
Yep.
Sure is pretty.
Yeah, sure is.
- Who'd you sell it to?
- Donavan.
Who?
Mr. Donavan.
He picked it out this morning.
Did he really?
Did he really?
Donavan!
Yes, you, you snake oil salesman.
Are you coming out here,
or am I coming in there?
What's the matter?
Is there some trouble?
Yes, there's trouble all right,
and you're in it.
"All I want is a chance
to be on my way,
"unencumbered and unfettered."
That's right.
That's all I wanted.
Don't slick-talk me,
you fourflusher!
Dusty!
Wait a minute, Dusty.
Wait, wait a minute, Dusty.
Hold it, please.
Wait a minute!
Wait.
Dusty! Wait, wait, Dusty.
Wait, now, wait, Dusty.
Now, wait a minute!
Dusty, will you just
let me say one word?
One.
- Dusty.
- That's it.
No!
"Nothing could be further
from my mind, Miss Clydesdale.
"You have my word as a gentleman."
I meant it. I--
- Gentleman?
- Yeah!
Ah!
No!
Get off of him.
And you coward.
Aha!
No, no, Dusty.
- Back! Back!
- Give me that!
- Don't!
- "That's true!"
Now, wait a minute, Dusty.
Now, wait.
Dusty.
No, no, no! Wait!
Now, this is ridiculous.
When you, uh, get rational,
we'll discuss this.
Oh!
We'll discuss it right now.
Oh!
Sorry, Ralph.
Dusty, you're being hysterical.
We can't accomplish anything this way!
What happened with them two?
They got married.
- Dusty, be reasonable.
- Shut up, you liar.
I don't know what's happened,
but I can explain.
You're not getting out of it that easy,
you pasteboard slinger.
Pay you back, Homer.
Oh! What? Dusty! Dusty!
Now look,
what's bothering you?
That bed!
That great, big brass bed!
If you had no intention of exercising
your husbandly prerogatives,
why'd you buy that bed?
That's it?
The bed?
Yes!
The bed...
happens to be...
for the kids, Dusty.
With the nights getting colder,
they need a warmer place to sleep.
So, the brass bed is for the boys,
and the smaller bed is for Celia!
Well, why didn't you
say so in the first place?
And we could have avoided
this little misunderstanding.
Pardon me.
Excuse me, please.
Come along, Celia.
This is no place for a lady.
Come on, let's go!
All right, all right.
Quiet down now.
Order! Order in the court!
Order, order!
Quiet now!
Everybody, sit down and shut up.
Edgar, you get back in your seat.
I think we've heard
about all the testimony...
this building can take.
Now, I'm gonna decide
who gets these sprouts of Wintle's,
and that decision
is gonna be final.
This court appreciates...
the generosity...
and the kindness...
of all you good people...
who have offered to provide
homes for these kids...
and to safeguard their assets.
Proves this town's got
a heart after all.
But after due deliberation...
and a consideration of all the facts,
and the merits of the applicants,
this court awards...
Bobby, Clovis,
and Celia Bradley...
to Mr. and Mrs. Russel Donavan.
Well, that's the order of this court.
I don't want to hear
a lot of argument about it.
And I don't want a half
a dozen people coming up here--
Homer.
I heard you were about
to gavel off my kin.
Hold it. Pretty good
to be back in town.
That won't be necessary now
since I'm here to claim them.
Donavan, thank you for
taking such good care of them.
My lawyer.
He will explain all the "whereases"
and "wherefores."
Tell them.
Tell them, uh,
why the kids are mine,
with no "maybes".
May it please the court,
I have an order.
What would please
this court is to see...
both of you rode out
of this town on a rail!
Your Honor, the law--
I don't need no checkered-pants
lawyer to tell me the law.
Give me that.
All right,
they're yours, Wintle.
Get yourself and
that jackleg out of here...
before I show you how
contemptuous this court can be.
Guess so, Reverend.
That gold's the most
valuable shipment...
ever entrusted
to the Butterfly Line.
Oh, my goodness gracious.
The most valuable shipment?
My word!
And exactly, how much
does this nugget weigh?
356 pounds,
without the crating.
Now, uh, that's not quite
as large as the one...
they found in Breckenridge.
Still, that's a whole lot
of gold all in one piece.
Oh, I assume you have a goodly
portion of men protecting it.
We're bringing in extra guards
from Marysville tomorrow.
I see.
Then you won't be making
your regular noon passenger run.
Well, now.
Oh, fear not, dear brother.
You're speaking to
a servant of the Lord.
Well, being a man of the cloth,
it can do no harm.
Ahem.
They're taking it out
as soon as the, uh,
bank closes at 4:00 tomorrow.
But, they won't be going
by the regular route.
They'll be going over China Grade.
Splendid.
Splendid idea.
Why,
I shouldn't imagine that
they would encounter...
so much as a horned frog
on that old slag road.
My thinking precisely.
Uh, Reverend,
could I buy you a drink?
Oh, thank you, no, sir.
I never imbibe.
However, I would be
happy to accept this...
as a contribution for the poor.
Bless you, brother.
Bless you.
Well, Charlie.
Charlie, I seem to have, uh,
left my purse at the office.
I was, uh--
Ah!
Would you set them up
for Charlie and me there?
Hi, Dusty.
Howdy.
Annulment papers.
Homer says you can drop them off
at the Marysville courthouse,
but it'll take two, three days.
We must have set
some kind of record.
Yes.
Well, you're finally rid of them.
What now?
Well, I guess
I'll work my way East.
Change of scenery,
change of luck, you know.
Uh, Dusty?
Thanks for what you did.
We tried something.
It didn't work, that's all.
Well,
- Good-bye.
- Bye.
Donavan?
You were...
a good father to those kids.
They couldn't have asked for better.
We got along.
Mm-hm.
Well.
And, Donavan?
Yeah?
I'm sorry I hit you in the head
with the spittoon.
A perfectly logical
misunderstanding.
And I'm sorry that I...
offered you a drink
in the saloon too.
Well, it's a perfectly
logical misunderstanding.
Well, I wouldn't make
that mistake again.
You wouldn't?
Good luck, Dusty.
How you expect to get warm,
sitting in front of a fire
that's been out for two days?
Aw, I don't know.
I always used to sit here
for breakfast.
Couldn't we build just
one little itty-bitty fire?
It don't seem like home no more.
No!
Amos, I tell you,
we got big trouble.
We go in town to get food,
we get strung up.
If we stay here,
we'll starve to death.
If we don't freeze to death first.
So, what's it gonna be?
Well.
Well, what if we went down
and told Sheriff McCoy that...
that we was real sorry,
and, and we wasn't gonna
rob banks anymore?
- Ever.
- Right.
And we'd even cross our heart.
Well, that's worth thinking about.
We wouldn't want to take
any ropes with us, would we?
Hey, mister!
What do you kids want now?
You tell them, Bobby.
We want you to have
our gold nugget.
What gold nugget?
The one you tried to steal.
Oh, that gold nugget.
All you gotta do is
take it out of the bank.
You kids come all the way
up here just to tell us...
to rob the bank again?
We're already sentenced to be hung
for robbing it the first time.
Say, uh,
maybe, it's a fix
to smoke us out, Theodore.
This isn't any trick.
Judge McCoy said Mr. Wintle
really doesn't want us.
He just wants the gold.
So, if you take the gold,
then Mr. Wintle
will go away again.
And Mr. Donavan will be
stuck with us again.
Mr. Donavan buys us all
the apple dumplings we can eat.
It ain't like it's really stealing.
It's our gold,
and we're giving it to you.
And all you have to do
is pick it up.
We'll help you.
Pardon me just a minute, ma'am.
What do you think,
Theodore?
Oh, I don't know about...
the Hash Knife throwing in
with a bunch of kids.
How's that gonna look
in the history books?
Well, we wouldn't have
to call it "Hash Knife".
We could call them
the "Apple Dumpling g*ng".
Who's gonna know the difference?
It's like the kid says.
It ain't actually stealing.
And you better hurry...
because we're leaving at 4:00,
when the bank closes.
Theodore?
All right.
All right! Come on.
Now, here's the bank.
Now, we're gonna need
some dynamite to blow the safe.
And we gotta get some kind
of a wagon to haul off the gold.
You got that, g*ng?
Now, I think we'll go in the side door.
You remember that side door.
Yeah. Now, we were
hanging in there,
let's see, that would be
just off to the right. Yeah.
Well, you told me
to get you a wagon, didn't ya?
Not that wagon.
Well, what's wrong with it.
I, uh--
Look.
These are the fastest horses in town.
We'll be halfway to Mexico
before they find out.
All right.
It's too late to change now.
Let's get the thing headed
in the other direction.
Right.
You kids keep a lookout
for the sheriff.
I'm sorry. We're closed.
- Eh?
- I say we're--
I'm sorry, Reverend.
We're, we're closed for the day.
You'll--
Open that safe.
Now, get over here.
Quick.
Clovis!
Somebody else is already
robbing the bank.
Come on.
Oh, no.
- Come on, get on in there.
- Get on in there.
Hurry up!
Where'd they come from?
They was outside looking in.
Well, get them over yonder
out of the way.
And you keep quiet, you hear?
Ox, keep an eye on them.
Get out of the room.
Ain't that the most
beautiful sight you ever saw?
Boy, oh, boy.
Ay ay ay.
- Mm.
- It's heavy.
- Where's the wagon?
- It's right outside.
Easy, boys.
Let me catch up with you.
This blasted thing weighs a ton.
- Dang it.
- Sure does.
My leg don't work too good
going round this turn.
Now, that's got it.
Now, we got her.
Hey, don't nobody move!
This is a holdup!
All right, we're gonna
rob the bank, and...
we mean business.
You're a day late
and a dollar short.
Well, sure like
he said right here.
Did you say it? But--
Ah!
Who in blazes are you?
Well?
Uh, Mr. Stillwell asked you
a question, Theodore.
Uh, uh--
- Theodore.
- Hi, Frank.
- Amos.
- Uh.
You still aren't mad 'cause I shot you
in the leg, are you, Frank?
I guess you are.
Please, gentlemen,
no sh**ting.
That dynamite is old
and is sweating.
If he drops it, there won't be
a bit of this bank left.
That makes sense.
All right, you two,
get over here and out of the way.
All right. Move.
All right, move!
Get these kids out of here
where we can watch them.
All right, you.
Come on!
You're gonna walk right
out of here ahead of us,
straight to the wagon.
One peep out of you and
I'll blow a hole in you...
that you can throw
a mule through.
You understand?
All right, get to walking,
and keep smiling.
Hurry up!
Hooks, get ahold of this.
Come on. Easy does it.
All right.
That's our gold!
We said they could have it!
Out of my way. All right,
now we're gonna walk--
Ow!
- All right! All right!
- Ay!
Hold on. Right here.
Ah!
Watch out for that dynamite!
Whoa, whoa.
It's the law!
Looks like we're gonna have
to blast our way out of here.
You idiot!
What's all the firing?
They're trying to get the nugget.
Get this thing off of me!
Hold this.
We need to delate.
Must be 50 of them in there.
I'll go get old Betsy.
Somebody get him a drink.
Take more than that
to get the sting out of him.
Get down!
- My knees!
- Get down!
Don't do that anymore.
And get down!
Ah! Ah, I'm sitting on my spurs!
Dusty!
Are you trying
to get yourself k*lled?
I am trying to stop
a bank robbery.
Well, do it from a safe place,
not the middle of the street!
Hurry up!
Get it inside!
Come on!
Hey, it's coming.
Yes! Whoa!
Ah!
Does anyone know where
Alvin keeps his corkscrew?
Where is it?
Where is it?
Grab these kids,
and let's get out of here.
What about the gold?
Forget about the gold.
We'll be lucky to escape
with our hides.
Hurry up.
Frank, are, are you sure
you don't want your gold?
It's all yours, partner.
Don't spend it all in one place.
I'm gonna buy some new toes.
You can't take those children.
- Let's go this way.
- Frank, our horses are around front.
Well, so is half the town!
Come on.
I ain't never gonna rob no bank,
ever, ever, ever.
- That's it!
- Ah!
- I can't move!
- I can walk. I can walk.
- My back!
- Come on, let's go.
- Let's go!
- My back!
I can't move!
- We got to get out of here.
- I can't move! My back!
- All right. Let's go.
- Ah!
The dynamite!
I can't move.
Just cover me, Mildred.
Mr. Donavan!
- Mr. Donavan!
- They got Celia.
Hyah!
Ow!
Oh!
Hyah! Hyah, hyah!
Hyah!
Clyde!
Howdy.
Shh! Listen.
- They stopped firing.
- Ah!
There's still two more in there.
Get this team to moving!
Hurry! Hurry!
Knock your head off!
Hyah! Hyah!
Ay ay ay!
Celia!
Dusty!
Hey!
Oh, God!
Donavan!
What? Whoa!
You always kiss like that?
- I've been saving up.
- Oh, yeah?
Get Stillwell, wring him out,
and lock him up.
Donavan?
Dusty?
You're gonna drown in there.
I guess, they don't mind.
Well, we better get back to town,
and see what's happened
to that nugget.
Gold!
It's a gold nugget, Lily!
- Gold!
- Gold!
Gold!
- Gold!
- Real gold!
- Gold! Yeah.
- Gold!
- Gold!
- Gold!
- Gold!
- Gold!
- Gold!
- Gold!
Get out of here.
This is my claim.
Anyone who looks for gold
around here is gonna fight me.
♪ I wandered today to the hill, Maggie ♪
♪ To watch the scenes below ♪
♪ The brook and the creaking
old mill, Maggie ♪
Yikes!
My bank.
My beautiful bank.
Oh, a man that can fill
an inside straight like you can...
don't need a bank.
Leonard,
you can work out
of my barbershop...
till you rebuild at no charge.
I want you to know...
that I hold your bank
and this town responsible...
for the loss of my gold.
And you!
You can be jolly well responsible
for those three brats too.
Mr. Donavan!
Mr. Donavan!
Theodore and Amos,
they were in the bank.
There you are, Donavan.
5,000 for the capture
of Frank Stillwell.
It's no more than you deserve,
Donavan.
And here is the deed
of the Benson place.
There it is.
The roulette tables,
crystal chandeliers,
the red carpets,
everything.
Well, you don't have to go through
with it if you don't want to, Donavan.
Someone else will buy
the Benson place.
It's in fine shape.
It shouldn't be so bad.
I'll be going into town one or
two nights a week to play poker.
Wanna bet?
Look, it's a holdup.
Whoa.
Hi.
I thought you promised Sheriff McCoy
you were gonna stop that.
Oh, we are stopping,
Mr. Donavan.
Fact, me and Amos talked it over,
and we've decided we've been
the scourge of the west long enough...
and we're hanging
our firearms up for good.
And, uh,
well, we was just
wondering if, uh, uh--
Climb on.
You mean I'll be living
under the same roof...
with these two lawless profligates?
Just till you hear from Mr. Gould, Pa.
That horse got a name?
- Lucius.
- Oh, yeah?
Lucius, Clarice.
Clarice, Lucius.
♪ So they settled down together ♪
♪ Their troubles all behind ♪
♪ Now that Donavan and
Dusty tied the knot ♪
♪ And their friends wished them happiness ♪
♪ As all the church bells rang ♪
♪ For that family called
the Apple Dumpling g*ng ♪
Mr. Donavan?
I gotta go.
♪ And they called them ♪
♪ the Apple Dumpling g*ng ♪
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