01x03 - Tangled Web

[bunniefuu]

you know this is a showdown right Kimiko

you know those boots make you look like

a dweeb right Jack so not the case

these Shen Gong Wu the Jetbootsu

allow me to defy gravity you might as

well say bye-bye to the monkey staff cuz

that one's as good as mine - you wish

Fist of Tebigong

like that's going to work I'm defying

gravity remember classic miscalculation

your hospital head is
insured your defeat

hey check it baby

the Fist of Tebigong is mine
the Jetbootsu are mine hey

what's this the monkey staff is mine

I have the agility and
the balance of a monkey

hey and a really cool tail

this waters cold

I'm telling you I don't know how my
cousin Nessie stands living here

Course if he asked me she
likes all the attention

hey look it's the
Loch Ness monster

hey look it's the
Loch Ness monster

see

Oh Kimiko Pease

do not feel sad

I don't I don't need your

pity either

I was really going to point

out that you could not expect to do

better as you're a girl

Pardon me?

Since we met I have been studying all
about girls from the 7th century poem

the ancient guide to female

yes

it tells us that your talents lies

elsewhere in the
kitchen for example

don't be so hard on Kimiko
she was just trying

to do a level best which was
pretty good considering

considering what?

considering you're
such a hothead

I believe her failure was due to her

lack of upper-body strength

I'll show you upper-body strength

look out she might use her
slip and fall move on you

Shen Gong Wu alert

what do we got?

The Tangle Web Comb

cool what does it do?

oh man that's hairy

let's quit dilly-dallying
and go get it

nowhere to go it's here baby

here?

As in right here?

that's what here traditionally means

right here

This ones all mine

Kim's right.
it should definitely be hers

she has to replace the one she just lost

sorry

I mean the two she just lost

it's a... comb

cute

I think it's great you
found a comb Kimiko

oh yes accessorizing is
within your talents as a female

stand back and prepare
to be impressed

Tangle Web Comb

Oh yeah.

I am so...

in trouble

hey

I don't think she's using it right

you guys want to go look
through clinical stuff?

I have never look through a girl stuff before

This shall be enlightening

hey.

Touch my stuff and I'll...

Kimiko?
Are you in need of assistance?

no.

I just need to practice.

the Tangle Web Comb is a
difficult Shen Gong Wu to master

it requires absolute focus

I am so all about absolute focus

I never met an accessory I couldn't handle

I see

Thanks

But there's something
wrong with that

stupid comb I was
totally focused

is that so

then please demonstrate
your tremendous focus

How?

pour some tea

is this a joke?

it requires absolute focus to
successfully pour tea from

that pot into those cups
without spilling a single drop

alright this is a
serious waste of time

See? Totally focus.

these candy most unpleasant

that's cause it's lipsticks

oops I think
I deleted something

Hey. That's my
lipstick and my PDA.

keep pouring Kimiko

Look guy,s Kimiko serving up Tea

The traditional female role

tea sure would hit the
spot right about now

are you making cookies we could
use cookies or something

oh yes something
tastier than this

Master Fung

- keep pouring
- But,

you must drown out all
distractions quiet the storm of

your mind only then will
you achieve absolute focus

the next one will be perfect

I'm very surprised
Kimiko can lift such a

heavy pot with her
delicate female arms

What?

wanna bet chores on when Kimiko will

find her focus this century or next

I'm loving this I have a tail

see I'm happy

look at me

I'm a monkey in a tree

we have world domination to plan

what's the point of world

domination if you can't
have a little fun

Keep it down up there

I hate when my
parents have parties

Drop the Monkey Staff.

the longer you hold it the more
monkey-like you will become

I don't see it.

Intruder alert

Excuse me.

sorry I don't know
anybody was down here

what do you want?

trying to get away from the party

boring

standard for my folks parties

stop fest to go go

so are you Jack?

they're all talking about upstairs

they're talking about me?

what are they saying are
they calling me a genius?

More like weirdo

weirdo?

What so weird about me?

My monkey strength.

hey stop touching

you know this screams
evil lair of a

supervillain intent on
taking over the world

really

yeah I like

Indeed.

what an intriguing young woman

out.

All right

You don't haveto shriek.

monkey-face freak

a monkey-face freak who
takes care of business

if only you could deal with the

Xiaolin warriors as effectively

I am sensing a new Shen Gong Wu

- the Golden Tiger Claws
- Golden Tiger Claws

Golden Tiger Claws

what are the Golden Tiger Claws?

Tiger Claws made of gold...

Spill it woman

whoever wields them can transport

themselves to any location they choose

we must retrieve them with the Tiger

claws in our arsenal we shall be

invincible

you think I could get a
tire swing install in here?

Golden Tiger Claws are
inside that palace?

that's what this rash is telling me

Wonder if there's an
ointment for this

how do we get in there?

maybe if we knockon the
door and ask real nice like

that's the Emperor's Palace they don't

just let anybody in there

we need connections

oh no worries I'll

call my dad

Moshi Moshi Papa, Kimiko, yeah I

needed a few invites to
the Emperor's Palace

no way, not going to happen

not in this lifetime

really?

Do I have to?

all right

well?

We're in,
but there's a catch

Shut it.

I think Kimiko clothing
is most appropriate

she at last resembles a girl

where your formal duds Omi?

these are my formal robes Clay

thread count is slightly higher

notice the exquisite sheen

let's find these
Tiger claws and bail

Are you planning on walking
three steps behind us

no I'm planning on
leaving you in my dust

be careful or you'll fall

need a hand?

what I need is for you
to get out of my way

Stupid kimono

you can do this. Focus.

Kim's looking wobbly anybody
want to double our bet?

say two weeks of chores

Focus

any sign of the claws?

these are lion's claws
very similar

but no dice

Oh dice are we

looking for dice too?

nothing here but
dust bunnies

I know it's down here

somewhere but but but
more down then here

there's a door

a staircase into the darkness

- how very...
- creepy?

- yes
- after you Kimiko

unless you're scared

oh yes females are easily frightened

you're lucky you're cute Omi

can anyone see anything?

what's that moaning?

Quit your incesive moaning
and get the Tiger Claws

you fool

can't help it I'm
banana nauseated

Its Jack and he's headed towards

the Tiger claws

so don't need this right now

jackbots get rid of them now and give me

some ginger ale

Yes sir.

Thanks.
you could crush them now

Water

Earth.

thanks for dropping by or just dropping

Wind.

why do you build these stupid machines?

they are useless

My mom said I needed a hobby

that's better now for the claws

Fire.

sweet I challenge you to a
xiaolin showdown

name your game Jack

raced across the bridges
first one all the wins

what do you say Kimiko?

I say let's go Xiaolin Showdown

Gong Yi Tanpai

might be better if I was wearing high-tops

Get in the game girl

Anyone want to double our
little wager again Omi?

Clay?

Okay

this is too easy

that's a good look for you

stupid showdown

hey what's keeping you

it helps if you don't fall on your butt

tangle web comb

Uh-oh.

No.
Let me go you stupid...

you must drown out all distractions

quiet the storm of your mind only then

will you achieve absolute focus

The Tiger Claws are mi...

Hey.

It work.

big deal you got the monkey staff

She has achieve absolute focus

Too bad i I'm only...

one

small

step

No.

told you she would

looks like you win
the bet partner

I never doubted her for a second

we shall do all your chores for

the next week

for the next four weeks

we doubled twice remember?

actually I was

hoping you would forget

How'd you like me now?

good job

You whipped Jack butt good

Kimiko you have taught
me much about the

strength of women I now completely

understand modern females

let's just say you've
made a step in the right

direction which is good I'm hoping to

get a little more respect around here

you got it monkey-butt

Girls have tails?

I cannot believe
your incompetence

you lost another
Xiaolin Showdown

couldn't help it I had bananas
and tire swings on my mind

more importantly you

underestimated your opponent

there must be other compitent human
in this realm I could work with

I'm your girl

crush her

call me Katnappe

meow

Evil diva

She is evil

My dear girl

Have you ever heard
of the Shen Gong Wu?