02x03 - H is for Human

[bunniefuu]

[♪ OLIVIA RODRIGO SINGS "BRUTAL"]

♪ ♪

♪ I'm so insecure, I think ♪

♪ That I'll die before I drink ♪

♪ And I'm so caught up in the news ♪

♪ Of who likes me, and who hates you ♪

♪ And I'm so tired that I might
quit my job, start a new life ♪

♪ And they'd all be so disappointed ♪

♪ 'Cause who am I, if not exploited? ♪

♪ ♪

♪ And I'm so sick of 17 ♪

♪ Where's my f*cking teenage dream? ♪

♪ If someone tells me one more time ♪

♪ "Enjoy your youth", I'm gonna cry ♪

♪ And I don't stick up for myself ♪

♪ I'm anxious and nothing can help ♪

♪ And I wish I'd done this before ♪

♪ And I wish people liked me more ♪

♪ All I did was try my best... ♪

[SMACKS LIPS]

♪ Unrelentlessly upset ♪

♪ Ah, ah, ah ♪

♪ They say these are the golden years ♪

♪ But I wish I could disappear ♪

♪ Ego crush is so severe ♪

♪ God, it's brutal out here ♪

[CHIMES]

[SIGHS]

[EERIE MUSIC PLAYING]

[SIGHS]

[BREATH QUIVERING]

[PANTING]

Hi. Welcome to Jitter Bean,
what can I get for you today?

You think that's f*cking funny?

[SIGHS]

[GROANS]

- I'm sorry...
- [SNORTS]

[SIZZLING]

I'm taking this orange
cranberry scone, b*tch.

[BREATHING SHAKILY]

f*ck.

[MARIE] I don't know
what any of this means.

I'm not Odessa.

Every single one of these birth records

except Marie's says they're dead.

But no cause of death
is listed on any of them.

Maybe all 25 of you were
in a cage fight till death

and you just m*rder*d
some sweet baby a*s.

I didn't get my powers
till I was a teenager.

How does that even make sense?

[POLARITY] Well, whatever Odessa is,

you're the only survivor.

- That could be good for us.
- No. It is not good.

Starlight said Odessa is a weapon.

You are Odessa. The math
is pretty clear here.

- Maybe we can use you as a weapon.
- I'm not a weapon.

Okay?

I'm not anything.

Why the f*ck should we trust
anything Starlight says, anyway?

Why wouldn't we trust Starlight?

She tells Marie to go back to school
to find something called Odessa.

And then you're Odessa.

What are the f*cking odds of that?

I mean, she had to have known, right?

She said we had to stop it,
though, so if she knew it was me,

why'd she save me from Dogknott?

- Just a big f*cking coincidence, okay?
- [EMMA] Okay, either way, this is massive.

So, what do we do?

[MARIE] I guess I could...

try and ask Pam.

- Who's Pam?
- Here.

In the photo.

- My Aunt Pam.
- You have an aunt?

Uh, not by blood. She
was my mom's best friend.

Like family to us.

I might have her number
from, like, ten years ago.

I can ask around Vought. There's
folks there that are still friends.

You guys should get back to campus
before they notice that you're gone.

Just be careful.

I was gonna skip.

Mental health day.

Let me put it another
way. Get the f*ck out.

Oh, actually, Emma, if you could, uh,

hold on for a second. Um, I, uh...

I just have to ask you about yesterday.

Oh! Oh, oh. Right. In the archives.

- Yeah.
- [QUIETLY] When I grew, and got naked,

and you saw my knockers and dockers

all big on display, like... [WHOOSHES]

It's okay. No, really, I'm...
it's... that's really sweet.

God, no, no. No, no. I just mean
what happened after you grew.

Oh. You mean... ?

Yeah. When you got small again.

When I filled up three
shredder bins with puke, yeah.

It's an emergency situation.

I'm fine. Really.

I don't normally have
to do that anymore.

These days I can just shrink
with crushing self-hatred.

[STAMMERS] I know it
doesn't sound like progress,

but it is, so...

Yay.

[MARIE] I'm not Odessa.

I'm not any f*cking chosen one, okay?

- Chosen ones are like...
- Harry Potter.

- Neo.
- f*cking Frodo.

f*cking Frodo, exactly.

Baby-faced white dudes, not
someone who looks like me.

Maybe Pam can explain what the f*ck.

When was the last
time you talked to her?

I tried a few years
back, after my parents.

She wouldn't even talk to me.

She let me suffer at Red River
while she tried to adopt Annabeth.

It's shitty,

but I was almost happy when I
found out they wouldn't let her.

So, yeah, me and Pam?

Won't be awkward or horrible at all.

Should we talk about what I
said to you the other night?

Uh...

Yeah, I just, uh...

I don't know if-if now is,
uh, the right time, you know?

[CAR DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]

[PHONE CLICKS]

_

You are not going to believe this.

The Queen herself has returned.

Excuse me, excuse me.

Hi, Cate! Oh, wow, I love the beanie.

Stop by tomorrow for a
special "Get Ready With Me."

Styling a beanie can be tricky.

Lick the like button if you think
I should shed my skin in solidarity.

[CROWD CLAMORING]

- We love you, Cate. God bless you.
- You kick a*s!

- [MUFFLED SHOUTING]
- [HIGH-PITCHED RINGING]

[INHALES SHARPLY]

Welcome back, little miss popular.

Look how much they love you. [CHUCKLES]

Oh, this arm feels so weird,
it's like a rubber baseball bat.

Cate, Cate, Cate!

Oh! Watch the stinger.
Watch the stinger. Hey!

Do you want to die? Neither do I.

[HIGH-PITCHED RINGING]

I can't hear anything.

- I can't hear anything.
- Well, now hear this:

Vought has commissioned a new wig
for you, fashioned with virgin hair.

Taken off the same Norwegian
twins they use for Beyoncé's wigs.

It's nice to know the Norwegians
are good for something, am I right?

Hey, Cate!

- What's all this?
- It's Thomas Godolkin Day.

The new dean thought reviving the

celebration would
lift spirits on campus.

History, music, barbecue,

and for some, the night they
let the Deep deflower them.

Right on that bench.

Hmm?

Oh, sh*t.

[EMMA] We're f*cked.

- We're f*cked, we're so f*cked.
- Just stay cool.

Wow, a reunion! Heart
emoji, crying emoji.

Guys, isn't it wonderful
to have Cate back?

Right after getting Marie back?

Ugh, I'm in the presence
of so much greatness,

I-I can't even stand it.

Oh, and Little Cricket's here, too.

- Hmm.
- Cate. How are you?

[SIGHS] It is so terrible what happened,

but at least the perpetrators who
did this were brought to justice.

Yeah.

They were f*cking animals.

I'm taking Cate to class,

but hey, you're all in Hero
Optimization so we can all go together.

Uh, ooh, I'm actually not in
that weird gladiator m*rder class,

but, like, you guys... enjoy.

Great. This way, Guardians.

You don't want to keep the dean waiting.

[TENSE MUSIC PLAYING]

[THUDDING]

f*ck!

[PANTING]

[BUZZING]

[CIPHER] Well done, Marie.

We have work to do.

[GROANS]

Fiona, disappointing.

See yourself out.

Here in this class,

we have some of the most powerful
superheroes ever to walk these halls.

It really boggles the mind,
and yet, Cate Dunlap...

welcome back... was overrun

by a mere handful of Starlighter th*gs.

Not all of us are bulletproof.

Supes are outnumbered, what?
Ten million to one worldwide?

If humans ever get their sh*t together

and organize against us, let's face it.

We're f*cked.

Okay. Think about that until the next

time we're together. Class dismissed.

Not you, Marie.

Let's talk.

[HEAVY DOOR CLANGS]

So, uh, Marie, tell me,

why cut yourself?

I'm sorry?

Why do you cut yourself to
gain access to your powers?

It's just... always how I've done it.

Um, self-harm is kind of
a distasteful disorder.

It's very human.

It's not self-harm.
It's just how I fight.

Agree to disagree.

Uh, right now, you're Angelina
Jolie in Girl, Interrupted.

And what I'm hoping for
is Angelina Jolie in Salt.

You could be something magnificent

if you just believed it up here.

- [♪ COOKIE CARTEL SINGING "WILDFIRE"]
- ♪ You know I'm like a wildfire... ♪

[EMMA] She brainwashed
you. Wake the f*ck up!

Sooner or later, you're gonna have
to face up to what you've done.

Okay, look, I don't know
what's going on with you,

but you need to get your sh*t together.

She was right. [STAMMERS]
I've done things.

You know you're kind of
coming apart right now, right?

- What the f*ck?
- [JUSTINE] I hope you don't think

that I'm gonna be the
one to hold you together.

- That's good sh*t.
- You've heard the saying,

"If you love someone, set them free"?

Well, I think that's true, too,

if you're only mildly
interested in them, Sam,

so we're done, okay?

- Yeah, sure.
- Okay, look.

Uh, I didn't sign up for this.

Plus, I didn't get much of a follower

bump when we hooked up anyway, so...

Okay.

I gotta go.

[CARTOONY VOICE] Of course she left.

She thinks you're a f*cking monster.

- And she's right.
- No.

- You are a monster.
- No.

Remember that woman that you grabbed?

She was screaming for her boyfriend,
but you just dragged her away.

Hey, shut up.

- Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!
- Anything that Homelander

- or Vought wanted, you did.
- No.

The most f*cked-up

- summer internship there ever was.
- Uh-uh.

You make me sick. [RETCHES]

- f*ck that.
- Oh, f*ck.

[STAMMERING]

Let go of me!

Put me down, you sack of sh*t!

- f*ck you!
- You're garbage!

[LAUGHS]

[WHIMSICAL MUSIC PLAYING]

[HIGH-PITCHED VOICE] Hey, Sam, up here.

JFK Junior faked his death.

Seriously, listen.



- For real. Sam!
- No, no, f*ck this.



He just said, "Be stronger, like
Angelina Jolie in Salt" or some sh*t.

A cliché spy in a mediocre movie?

Why is he being so
f*cking creepy with me?

I-I don't know. Uh, maybe you're
the chosen one and he knows it.

Will you f*ck off with that?

And what the f*ck with Cate?

[QUIETLY] Did she tell
Cipher what we did or not?

- I don't know.
- You don't know.

You could fill a book with
the sh*t you don't know.

Whoa. Where the f*ck
is that coming from?

I don't know.

I... [SIGHS]

I was a virgin.

A virgin what?

A virgin virgin.

Before you and I...

You know, I was, technically,
I guess, a virgin.

- Technically?
- I mean, yeah.

I got fingered by Eddie Fineman
behind the slide at Red River once,

but I never had the actual, um...

genital-to-genital intermingling that...

you and I...

You can't say "I love you" to the
first person you have sex with.

That's your response?

[GRUNTS]

I'm sorry, it's the truth.

There's a lot of other truths you
could have picked besides that one!

- What the f*ck?
- You tell me what the f*ck.

No. There.

Can you lift this a little
higher, please? Higher. Higher!

- What the hell is happening?
- [STACEY] Do you love it?

Because you better love it.

It's just like those posters of
Homelander... when you walk by,

Jesus appears over his
shoulder. Two blessed saviors.

Okay, why are there pictures
of me all over the place?

You two haven't been
checking your phones?

The new rankings are out.

Jordan, you're number one!

[LAUGHS]

Okay. Come with me.

There's a lot to go
over before the ceremony.

[PHONE CHIMES]

_

I know, the new rug looks like a

Dairy Queen's afterbirth, but I like it,

it ties the room together.

So, what can I do for you, Cate?

Tell Vought the truth.

I love it. What truth?

That Emma, Jordan and
Marie tried to k*ll me.

I don't think that's a very good idea.

Tell them or I will.

Telling Vought means telling Homelander.

And if you tell him what happened,
you've got to tell him everything.

Hey, let's just play that out.

[MIMICS HOMELANDER] Hey, howdy,
Cate. It's me, Homelander.

Oh, you got attacked, you say?

Half your skull got blown clean away?

What a f*cked-up situation.
And then what happened?

Wow. You're broken?

Your powers are totally f*cked-up?

You're no better than a human?

[SIGHS]

[CLEARS THROAT]

You've got a special
place at Vought right now.

Why risk that?

They left me for dead,

and I'm just supposed to
pretend like we're besties?

- f*ck that.
- You're supposed to focus

on getting better.

And remember

that your value in this world
comes and goes with your powers,

and without them, you are nothing.

So let's try and get
them back, sound good?

Have a nice day, Cate.

[MYSTERIOUS MUSIC PLAYING]

Need help finding your way out?

[DOOR OPENS]

[♪ THE NAH SINGS "ITZ EAZY"]

♪ Watch this... ♪

All yours.

It's a hybrid, like you.

We're shipping a second to
your parents as we speak.

Holy sh*t.

Yeah.

- This is...
- Only a portion of what God U

and its boosters can offer.

So, you can be here and be you.

Hey, uh, can I take a selfie with you?

Uh, sure. Yeah.

- [CAMERA CLICKING]
- Mm.

- Hey, can you switch?
- f*ck off.

I've got a dynamite speech for you,

harkening back to God U legends of old,

and then bravely looking to the future.

I also put some stuff in there

about the struggles of being
a trans person in the world

and how God U has welcomed
you with open arms.

Oh, and I worked in a word

"transtastic", which
I came up with myself.

I'm not trans. I'm bigender.

Oh, and I'm bi-golly shocked
that you would be so ungrateful,

but maybe it's just
a generational thing.

What if I say no to this?

Oh. Well, unlike you, there's only one

side to this coin, and there is no "no".

You're telling me this isn't
everything you've ever wanted?

Elmira was that fun?

Learn the f*cking speech,
say it with a smile,

and the next time a
fan asks you to switch,

tuck the junk, inflate
the fun bags and do it.

[SIGHS]

Hey, Emma.

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

- Hey...
- Hmm.

What would you do if you had to see

the person who tried to k*ll you
and left you for dead, every day?

Just smile at them
like nothing was wrong?

Technically, Jordan
and Marie did it, so...

[WHISPERS] f*ck.

Hey, welcome to Jitter Bean.
What can I get for you today?

Oh, where to start.

I'd like 17 muffins, please.

You, uh, you-you want 17 muffins?

Yes, 17.

Any kind will do, load me up.

Oh, it's not all for me.
I'm having, like, a party.

A muffin party, as one does.

Muffin party.

Got it.

[WHOOSHING]

g*dd*mn it.

- Wait, hey, can I see that for a sec?
- It was not me!

Okay? It was not f*cking me. It was...

I-I-I didn't mean to upset you.

- [HYPERVENTILATES]
- Hey, hey.

What's going on?

Every day it is another as*h*le

who says he's going to punch me,
or r*pe me or just f*cking k*ll me,

because they think I'm
putting these stupid flyers up.

My hair is falling out and I've had,

like, four or five panic
attacks in three days, so...

- Can't you just quit?
- If I could get another job I would, but...

Hey, some of us actually do
give a sh*t, believe it or not.

So I need you to help me figure
out who's doing this, all right?

I-I have no clue.

We have cameras, but
they-they don't catch anyone.

Like, I-I-I tear it down,
it's back up a second later.

Well, it could be someone invisible.

Maverick is more into bestiality
than social justice, so...

People surprise you, f*ck.

Speedster...

Teleporter...

Could be a camouflage Supe.

Do you, do you want anything
else with your 17 muffins?

Oh, f*ck the muffins. Black coffee.

With a straw.

Okay.

Oh, sh*t.

Speedster!

Thank you!

[EXCITING MUSIC PLAYING]

Got you.

Oh, sorry. My bad, my bad!

Oh, sorry. Sorry.

Hey, I just want to talk!

Oh, s-sorry.

Wait! Come back!

♪ ♪

Wow.

- Hey, what's good?
- You just gonna stand there, or... ?

Sorry.

- Excuse me. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.
- [OVERLAPPING CHATTER]

- Cricket in here? Nice.
- [LOCKER DOOR SLAMS]

- Is she okay?
- Guess what doesn't shrink.

[QUIETLY] Mazel tov.

- No, you don't!
- Hey, hey.

Sorry. Mm.

[GRUNTS]

[PANTING]

Oh, f*ck.

[ATMOSPHERIC MUSIC PLAYING]

[SIGHS]

[RAPID KNOCKING ON DOOR]

[KNOCKING CONTINUES]

- Go away.
- [SAM] Cate?

Cate, it's me. Please let me in.

[KNOCKING CONTINUES]

- Cate?
- [KNOCKING CONTINUES]

Hey, I need your help.

- Sam, I can't...
- [GROANS]

[EXHALES FORCEFULLY]

Everything that we
did, right? The people?

They just keep f*cking... ooh!

They keep coming back, and I
just want to make them go away.

So just, here, please... [EXHALES]

Make them, make them go away.

Sam, I can't.

The doctors don't want me
using my powers right now.

Doc-Doctors?

No, Cate, it's just one time.

It's just one time, right? You've
done this a million f*cking times!

I know, I know!

- Then just f*cking do it.
- I know... Hey! Don't! Don't.

You're right, okay? We've hurt people.

I hurt Luke when I pushed him too much.

And I can't do that to you
anymore, okay? I'm sorry.

Right.

[PULSING MUSIC PLAYING]

- Holy sh*t!
- Did you see that?

Whoa!

[JORDAN] Move. Get out
of the way. Move. Move.

- [GRUNTING]
- [OBJECTS CRASHING]

[YELLS]

[STUDENT] Cut it out!

Sam! What are you doing? Stop!

- Sam, stop!
- Get the f*ck out of here, Jordan!

[YELLING]

Calm the f*ck down!

[PANTING]

[POP MUSIC PLAYING FAINTLY]

[TENSE MUSIC PLAYING]

[PANTS, GRUNTS]

[SAM YELLS]

[MUFFLED VOICE] What the f*ck was that?

Two people just broke
through your wall, man.

[SQUISHING]

Ah, f*ck.

[PANTING]

Oh, Sam, just f*cking stop!

You've got to quit going aggro
on people that want to help you.

No. No one, no one can help me.

Give me a chance.

[EXASPERATED GROAN]

I just want to... I just want to forget.

You and me both.

Luke had the right idea.

[MIMICS expl*si*n]

No.

Hey.

[GRUNTS]

No, he didn't.

Your brother was wrong.

He wasn't thinking straight.

And he loved you,

you know that.

I mean, if you ever tried to...

hurt yourself, he...

he'd f*cking k*ll you.

[CHUCKLES]

[GENTLE MUSIC PLAYING]

There's been enough death.

I'm f*cking sick of it.

Aren't you?

[SIGHS]

Hi... [CLEARS THROAT] Aunt Pam.

It's me.

I know you f*cking hate
my guts or whatever,

but maybe you want to
help me solve a mystery,

blah, blah, blah, blah,
blah, blah, f*ck me.

[SIGHS]

[INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING]

[BUZZES]

[BEEPS]

[PAM] Yes?

Uh, hi.

It's me, Aunt Pam.

[SIGHS] Just...

Just don't call me that.

[LOCK BUZZES, LATCH CLICKS]

Your place is really nice.

- Thanks. I've been here a few years.
- Huh.

- Can I get you a drink or something?
- No, thank you so much.

I'm good.

I, um, I read about your jail stuff.

I was worried about you.

Yeah. No, um...

That's over now, thank God.

Afterwards, I...

I spent a lot of time
looking for Annabeth.

Have you heard from her at all?

No. I don't know where she is.

So how, so how are you?

Look, I've got a book club
Zoom thing in, like, 30 minutes.

Yeah. Yeah.

Do you remember this picture?

Yes, it was taken the
day after you were born.

I found it in a file called "Odessa".

- Does that mean anything to you?
- No, I've never heard that.

But this was taken in the clinic.

What clinic?

The fertility clinic.
Where you were conceived.

I'm sorry. [SCOFFS] I
was conceived at a clinic?

At Godolkin University.

Jackie and Malcolm tried
for years to get pregnant.

IVF was too expensive.

Vought came along, and...
it seemed like a miracle.

All expenses paid.

They never told me.

Well, I think I have a
few pictures from that day.

Wait, if they couldn't get
pregnant, then what about Annabeth?

No medical intervention needed there.

Turns out Annabeth was the real miracle.

Here you go.

[MOURNFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

[GASPS SOFTLY]

Would you mind... ?

Can I have these?

- I can make copies.
- It's fine. Keep them.

Wh-Why is he holding me?

That's Dr. Gold. He delivered you.

[DISORIENTING MUSIC PLAYING]

Do you know him?

[POLARITY] I know, you're
all asking yourselves,

what the hell does this old-a*s
Supe know about marketing?

Am I right?

Well, how about 17% first dollar
gross on my electric grills,

brand ambassador for Vought Gym,

and my fragrance Magnétique surpasses

Tom Ford's Tobacco Vanille in sales?

So I'd say nine figures in the bank

means I know a sh*t ton about marketing.

So you need to pay attention.

About to drop some science on you, okay?

Now, this is the way it goes.

- When you get out of this school...
- [QUIETLY] Holy f*ck.

... you need to be able
to make money for yourself

'cause not all of you
are gonna be superheroes.

Like, nobody in here is
probably gonna make The Seven,

I'm just telling you right now.

You're not gonna make The Seven.

So, how do we expand...

Um, ow?

... our brand? That's the question.

[QUIETLY] It was you.

What is your problem?

You're the spray painter.

I don't know what you're talking about.

[POLARITY] ... is the message.

What do you stand for? What do
you want to say to the world?

That's the question.

[DOOR OPENS]

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

It was you, Harper. I literally
caught you red-yellow-handed.

- You're crazy.
- Bullshit.

Bullshit. You're a secret
Starlighter, admit it.

[SHUSHES, MUTTERS]

So I'm right?

- f*ck.
- I knew it.

Justice never f*cking forgets.

Emma, please don't tell anyone.

Harper, what the f*ck?

You're a mimic? I
thought your power was...

tail?

My powers are chameleon.

So I can copy anyone else's
power for, like, 60 seconds.

The tail is just a pain in the a*s.

You're blowing my mind right now.

Come on.

Do me.

Oh, sh*t!

No sh*t.

You do my power better than I do.

Huh.

That is f*cking invalidating.

- Yeah.
- Oh, my God.

- I'm so sorry. Wow.
- God.

Jesus, how do you deal with this?

This is, God, so inconvenient.

Yeah, you kind of get used
to the public nudity stuff.

- Okay?
- Mm-hmm.

Harper, what the f*ck?
You spent all last year

sucking Justine's d*ck and now
you're a spray painter activist?

Like...

Hey, you're not gonna
tell on us, are you?

I'm not a f*cking narc.

Who's "us"?

[SENTIMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING]

[GASPS SOFTLY]

Oh.

I think you look like her.

You think so?

[CHUCKLES]

I didn't know she smoked.

[PAM] Oh, we all smoked back then.

Just being young and stupid.

[CHUCKLES]

You've got your, um...

your, uh, book thing.

- Right. Right.
- Right.

Uh, would you mind if I use
your bathroom before I go?

- It's a long drive.
- Of course.

It's just right there. On the right.

I thought it was for the money.

- What?
- I thought Mom and Dad got paid.

For sh**ting me up with Compound V.

But that's not why they did it.

They did it because they
wanted a baby to love.

And they loved you more than anything.

[TOILET FLUSHING]

[HAUNTING MUSIC PLAYING]

You should go.

Aunt Pam, what the f*ck is this?

- She lives here?
- No. Not anymore.

How? Why was she here with
you? Why didn't you tell me?

- I couldn't!
- Bullshit!

All these years you kept her from me?!

Do you know how f*cked-up that is?!

Marie, we were afraid of you!

You massacred your parents!

She didn't want to see you.

It took two years after she
got put into foster care.

But they finally let me have her.

I tried to give her a good
life, and I think I did.

- I want to talk to her.
- I can't let you do that.

Yes, you f*cking can. Where is she?

She doesn't want to see you,

It's her choice.

I didn't have... any choice.

My parents put a drug in me.

They decided that for me.

- I know...
- No, no. You don't.

Because you just stood there
and said that I massacred them!

You don't know anything!

I was a girl... who got her period.

That is it.

And you make me feel
like a monster for it,

and you let my sister
think that I'm a monster!

You let her believe that it's my fault!

I loved my parents.

But they did this.

Not me.

Just tell Annabeth...

And remember, kids, a super mind is
just as important as a super body.

So get your extra-large
Vought-a-Burger Kids' Meal.

Mmm-mmm!

And we'll see you
under the sea tomorrow.

♪ Ready, set, go for a fun-filled hour ♪

- [BONG GURGLING]
- ♪ Where learning is your superpower ♪

♪ Your living room's
your own Vought Tower ♪

♪ Down at Avenue V ♪

- ♪ Avenue V, Avenue V ♪
- [VOCALIZING]

♪ Just wait and see... ♪

You know, I thought you were weird

as f*ck to want to watch a kids' show.

[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]

- ♪ On Avenue V ♪
- [GURGLING]

- Starting to make sense now.
- [SNORTS]

I feel vindicated.

Thank you.

You know, Luke and I used to
watch this when we were kids.

He was a little too old for
it by then, but... [SNIFFLES]

he was always the first one up,

pulling me out of bed
every Saturday morning.

It makes me feel safe.

I get that.

I talk to him, you know.

Like, in my head.

And I just, like, tell
him about my day and...

I ask him for advice.

Does he have anything to say?

Hmm, no.

[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]

But it's nice to...

imagine.

[PENSIVE MUSIC PLAYING]

I would give anything...

for five more minutes.

What would you say to
Andre? If you could?

I don't know.

"I love you" sounds like cliché.

I'd probably just play Madden with him.

[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]

And tell him I loved him.

Should've said it more.

'Cause you never know
what's gonna happen, huh?

Hey, you want to watch another one?

Hey, boys and girls, welcome
to the Avenue V show...

This makes me miss home.

- ... where everybody's super.
- Yay!

Why don't you go?

My mom.

My mom, she's...

scared of me.

You're her kid.

I'm her kid who destroyed the house.

The car. The school.

[LAUGHS]

Yeah, but, Sam...

you're not that scary.

♪ Ready, set, go for a fun-filled hour ♪

♪ Where learning is your superpower ♪

♪ Your living room's
your own Vought Tower ♪

♪ Down at Avenue V ♪

♪ Avenue V ♪

[CROWD CHATTER]

[DOOR OPENS]

Hey, so I brought someone new.

Uh, so that's Ally.

Hey. Emma.

Holy sh*t.

You used to be Little Cricket.

Yeah. Yeah.

YouTube demonetized me, though, so...

- Can we trust her?
- Probably.

Definitely.

Okay. Okay.

Secret meeting. Let's go.

What's the plan?

- The plan?
- Okay.

Harper's gonna spray-paint
the word "fascist"

on the Homelander
statue tomorrow at lunch.

Acid yellow, super hard to remove.

[HARPER] And then flyers

on the cars in the faculty lot.

[ALLY] Mm-hmm, and then
red "f*ck Homelander"

on the Vought-a-Burger truck on Friday.

[WHISPERING] Is that it?

[REGULAR VOICE] Wait. Are you joking?

Sorry. Why are you here?

Oh, no. Listen, I-I-I-I
admire your ba*ls.

I mean, you guys could get k*lled
if you guys got caught, but...

and I mean this constructively...

what you're doing is stupid and useless.

- Okay. f*ck off.
- No. Sorry.

What I'm saying is that you
guys could be doing so much more.

Let's not f*ck around vandalizing sh*t.

Uh... uh...

I mean, what else can we do? We're...

Hit 'em where it hurts.

They can clean up paint.

What we should be doing is... sabotage.

Disrupt. Break sh*t.

Right?

Are you with me?

We're not like that, Emma.

- Yes, you are.
- [ALLY] We're in Performing Arts.

She's two steps away from
a tail fetish OnlyFans.

Um, b*tch?

[ALLY] We're not...

heroes.

I used to think like that.

But somebody believed in me.

And he thought I was a hero.

And...

And 'cause he believed it...

[WHISPERING] ... I started to.

[LAUGHS SOFTLY] And now I'm
telling you the same f*cking thing.

You can be heroes.

And f*ck sh*t up. [LAUGHING]

[HARPER LAUGHS SOFTLY]

No, but for real.

- [♪ CHAPPELL ROAN SINGS "SUPER GRAPHIC ULTRA MODERN GIRL"]
- ♪ Uh-huh ♪

♪ I'm through ♪

♪ With all these hyper
mega bummer boys like you ♪

♪ Oh, yeah, I need ♪

♪ A super graphic
ultramodern girl like me ♪

♪ We're hot, we're drunk, wow ♪

♪ Look at her moving,
baby, she's the one ♪

♪ Oh, yeah, I need ♪

♪ A super graphic
ultramodern girl like me ♪

- Hey, have you seen Jordan?
- Not yet.

[CROWD CHEERING]

[CIPHER] Thank you.

Thank you.

This year we celebrate
the 60th anniversary

of Godolkin University.

[CHEERING AND APPLAUSE]

The genius and foresight of
Thomas Godolkin is evident

in each and every one of you.

And as we continue to evolve
into our ever more perfect selves,

remember your history.

Even as we look forward to the future,

we must hold on to our traditions.

Godolkin University's

ranking system is vital to our survival!

[CHEERING]

[JORDAN] Marie!

Marie!

[CIPHER] The rankings,
they let us each know...

- Hey.
- How was Aunt Pam's?

Um... f*cking terrible.

- But also enlightening.
- I love you.

Oh.

I... I love you.

Even though that freaks the f*ck

out of me to say it, and I do not
want to get hurt, and I have never

said it to anybody
before, not like this.

You know, and what I-I-I realize now is

that we just don't know what's
gonna happen tomorrow or next week

or next year, and I don't
want to regret anything...

[HOPEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

[CIPHER SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]

[JORDAN AND MARIE LAUGH]

[CIPHER] May I introduce to you someone

who understands the
value of the rankings?

Your new number one and perhaps

the greatest number one yet, Jordan Li.

[CHEERING AND APPLAUSE]

[CHANTING] Jordan!
Jordan! Jordan! Jordan!

Jordan! Jordan! Jordan! Jordan!

Jordan! Jordan! Jordan!

[CHEERING]

Um... [CLEARS THROAT]

I want to thank God U for letting me

live my truth out loud on this stage.

Today we can unite behind
a common ideal as Supes.

We were all

assigned awesome at birth.

It's trans-tastic!

[CHEERING]

I'm proud to be here,
exonerated after so many months

of being wrongfully imprisoned that...

Sorry.

[APPLAUSE AND CHEERING]

Andre Anderson is dead.

[CROWD MURMURING]

[SOLEMN MUSIC PLAYING]

He died in that prison,
and if he were here today,

he would want me to be honest.

- About everything.
- [MURMURING CONTINUES]

His powers k*lled him.

They don't want people to know that.

Vought doesn't want you to know that.

But I want you to know...

that Andre died a hero,

trying to get us free.

Vought wants you to believe that
Cate was attacked by Starlighters.

- Jordan, no.
- But those people were innocent.

♪ ♪

They were scapegoats,
and Vought m*rder*d them.

[OVERLAPPING SHOUTING, BOOING]

Starlighters didn't attack Cate.

I did.

[CROWD JEERING]

[♪ ST. VINCENT SINGS
"BIG TIME NOTHING"]

♪ Don't blink, don't wait,
don't walk, you're late ♪

♪ Don't fall from grace,
behave, don't trip, sashay ♪

♪ Okay, sashay ♪

♪ Don't kid, don't blame,
don't snap, insane ♪

♪ Don't class, don't act your
age, don't change your name ♪

♪ It's all the rage ♪

♪ Do ask, but don't tell,
don't laugh, but do smile ♪

♪ Don't have a glass,
don't stay a while ♪

♪ Don't take a pic ♪

♪ Don't feel so sick ♪

♪ Big time nothing ♪

♪ I look inside, I look
inside, I look inside ♪

♪ Nothing ♪

♪ I look inside, I look
inside, I look inside your ♪

♪ Eyes ♪

♪ One, two, one, two ♪

♪ Don't show, don't
flake, go hard, debase ♪

♪ Don't make a dishonest
mistake, don't be so sure ♪

♪ I need a cure ♪

♪ One more score ♪

♪ Big time nothing ♪

♪ Just like a ♪

♪ Big time nothing ♪

♪ I, I, I ♪

♪ I look inside, I look
inside, I look inside ♪

♪ Nothing ♪

♪ I look inside, I look
inside, I look inside ♪

♪ Your ♪

♪ I look inside, I look
inside, I look inside ♪

♪ Nothing ♪

♪ I look inside, I look
inside, I look inside your ♪

♪ Eyes ♪

- ♪ Big time nothing ♪
- ♪ Big time nothing ♪

♪ Big time nothing ♪

- ♪ Big time nothing ♪
- ♪ Big time nothing ♪

♪ Big time nothing ♪