01x02 - Walking Free

[bunniefuu]

[slow dramatic music plays]

[Carole chuckles]

Hey, Mama.

Oh, gosh. It's good to see you.

-[Dale] Love you.

-Love you too.

[Carole]

Let's get outta here.

Let's go.

[music builds]

[Dale]

Walking out of those gates,

it's overwhelming.

Because when you dream

of something for so long,

and for it to finally come true

it's like: "Is it really real?"

[Dale]

Starting to shake. [chuckles]

-[Carole] Are you?

-It's starting.

-Gonna take--

-Reality's starting to hit me.

[soft piano music playing]

[Dale] Thirty years ago,

when I was incarcerated,

George W. Bush Senior

was the President of the United States.

The Cold w*r had just ended.

There was no internet.

There were no mobile phones.

I've been gone so long,

and society has evolved so much,

that

I mean, I can't even begin to understand

the things that I'm gonna experience.

You know, it's just--

It's gonna be amazing.

I mean, I'm in awe

of everything around me.

The joy and the happiness,

and just to be able to hold a cell phone

and to have real world clothes on.

[music builds]

I never dreamed that

I would be walking free

thirty years later.

[opening theme music plays]

[Dale]

Is the door open?

-Unlocked?

-No. I gotta unlock it.

[keys jangling]

[door opens]

[Carole]

You ready?

-Yeah, I'm ready.

-Here we go.

[guitar music plays]

[Carole] Okay.

[sighs] You wanna put your books here

for right now,

or do you wanna carry 'em on

in the room, or--?

I'm gonna go and put 'em in the room.

-Put 'em in the room? Okay.

-Yeah.

[Carole] Let me get behind you,

I want you to go in first.

[Dale laughs]

[Dale] Oh, man!

Oh [sighs]

[Carole] Yeah.

-[Carole] That's an air mattress.

-I know, be careful.

I'm 275, I might pop it.

-Oh, I hope not.

-I hope not.

I popped my mama's waterbed.

She was mad at me for that.

[both chuckle]

[Carole] No, the only thing that

I don't want you to be uncomfortable.

-Air conditioning.

-Yeah.

-The simple things of life

-Yeah.

that you don't get in a penitentiary.

-That's gonna become my friend.

-Like the room or not?

-I love it. Yeah.

-Okay.

I love it.

-I was gonna say

-Love it. Yeah!

-[Carole chuckles]

-Come on, compared to a cubicle

-Right.

-I mean, come on.

-My cubicle, Mama, was actually--

-Hey.

-I got you--

-Right here.

-That's how big my cubicle was.

-That's it?

Right here.

This space here is what I lived in

for 30 years.

-This is beautiful.

-Good.

Thanks for all your hard work, Mama.

You're welcome, baby.

[Dale] Dear Father,

thank you for this meal, God.

This is our first meal together, Father.

Please bless the food, God,

and we thank you for all things

in Jesus' name. Amen.

Amen.

Okay, you ready?

-Yeah.

-Go make a mess.

It's finger food.

-Except for that.

-It is, it really is.

Yeah.

[Dale] Hmm.

So how is it?

-Great.

-Okay [chuckles] good.

Well, isn't it? It's great.

-I love it.

-[both chuckle]

I mean, actually,

there's more than what I need,

and I can enjoy myself,

-and I ain't given just one piece, and--

-Right.

And you're not on a time schedule,

-but--

-"Get up.

-Is that what they do?

-You got 15 minutes to eat"

-[gasps]

-It's like five, six minutes.

They'll say: "Hey, get up. Time to go."

-Really?

-There's so many people,

they get institutionalized.

When they get up, they do the same.

Knock on the table and get up.

I'm like: "Why y'all doing that?"

That's institutionalized.

[slow moving strings playing]

[Dale] Being free after all them years,

and seeing the scenery,

and experiencing it all over again,

when before

I looked at life

and took it for granted.

But now

it's just, my perception

has totally changed.

I went to the door, and I was looking out,

and three little hummingbirds

come flying up

to the hummingbird feeder,

and I just thought that was

the most beautiful thing.

[Carole chuckles]

Trying to put it into words is

It's hard to do.

I mean, to have a place

to call home now

is amazing to me.

[slow, reflective music plays]

[Dale] Mama Carole's been such

a blessing to me.

For her to open her heart,

and to open her house,

and her life,

to me

that's something

the average person doesn't do.

Because who allows a convicted m*rder*r,

coming off of death row, did 30 years,

to come home to them

and allow them to call that home,

and to call you Mom?

She means so much to me.

I want her to understand

that she's valued.

And in order to do that, I have to

humble myself before her

and before God.

Who you gonna douse?

Don't even!

Ever been to Wet 'n Wild?

-What?

-You ever been to Wet 'n Wild?

Uh no

It's a swimming place.

And?

It's where you get in the water.

And?

Can I get you to go sit on the recliner?

-Really?

-Yes.

Yes, ma'am.

You was snooping while I was gone,

weren't you?

-Yes, I was.

-I feared as much.

Yes, I was.

You ready?

Jesus said

"You will know them

out of love."

[water trickling]

And I have the utmost respect

and love

for you.

And it is my mission and responsibility

to serve you

and to love you

because

[voice trembles]

when there was no way

God made a way

by bringing you into my life.

[delicate piano music plays]

I know you've sacrificed

-[sniffs]

-a lot

for me.

You're a blessing, Mama Carole.

When I couldn't go home to my own mama,

God brought me another mama.

-[sniffs]

-And I thank you

for being there for me.

-I love you, Mama.

-I love you, too.

[Carole sniffs]

[exhales]

[sniffs]

[crickets chirping]

[Carole] It was a great day.

Very special day.

As far as knowing Dale, I think I'm just

kind of scratching the surface.

I know he has a beautiful heart,

and his love for God,

but every day is gonna be

finding out something new,

something more about him,

and it's like any relationship.

You don't really

know each other until you're together.

I know very little

about what Dale did

to be put on death row.

I figured in time, Dale would tell me.

[train bell ringing]

[man]

Dale was not remorseful about it.

The m*rder didn't even faze him.

We were on a lot of drugs.

He was probably totally numb

to everything that was going around.

[ominous music plays]

My name is Shawn Anttila.

Dale Wayne Sigler

was a good friend of mine,

up until the time

when he committed the m*rder.

The day after the m*rder,

he came to my house.

It was just us,

he told me everything.

I remember Dale telling me details

about him going in there

and hanging out,

and pointing the g*n at the guy,

telling him: "You need to open the safe."

And he said he got the money,

and the guy was like:

"You don't have to do this."

Goes: "Yes, I do."

He pulled out-- He said,

He goes, "That's when I shot him."

"'Cause he knew me,

he knew my name, he could point me out."

Dale did know the victim,

because he would hang out

at that Subway shop.

We had a friend that worked there,

and he'd go and see our friend.

That's why the guy let him in

and was comfortable being around him,

and he didn't see him as a threat.

Dale tried to say

it was 'cause he was g*y.

He goes: "Yeah, I k*lled that f*gg*t."

That was the way he wanted people

to look at him,

as: "Don't f*ck with him,

he's gonna f*ck us."

That's how he liked it.

He liked people to be scared of him.

Think that he was gonna do

stuff like that.

The fact that the guy

at the Subway was g*y

probably made it easier

for him to k*ll him.

It wasn't the reason why he did it,

but it just made it, 'cause

he's g*y. [laughs]

Sorry, we lived in Texas back then,

and that is not a good--

That was not something you wanted to,

you know [chuckles]

Good boys did not like that.

Everybody had to have

that persona too around that,

'cause they couldn't show any empathy

for the g*y community back then.

You'd get labeled as g*y.

Dale definitely didn't want people

to think that about him.

That would've k*lled

his image, his persona

that he was trying to live up to.

I'd heard rumors and stories,

but as far as Dale being actually g*y

or h*m*,

I really don't think so.

He did take me to places where

there seemed to be a lot of g*y people.

But you just dismiss it.

"Oh, Dale wouldn't do stuff like that."

But hey

if he was, he hid it really well.

The whole thing has definitely

stuck with me my whole life.

At that point where the judge

actually told him his sentence,

death by lethal injection,

and he didn't even flinch.

Didn't care. Like he wanted it.

I think he wanted to die,

at that point in time.

I guess he thought

he had nothing left to live for.

[Dale] There ain't a day that goes by

that I don't regret what I've done.

Nothing that I say, nothing that I can do

can justify taking John's life.

All I've ever wanted to do was

to apologize.

[reflective music plays]

In the courtroom, I really

focused on the trial itself

and my family that was there.

At that point, I had accepted my fate.

I wanted to die. I wanted it to be over.

Um

But what really made an impact to me was

my mother and my father.

They both had nervous breakdowns.

That really affected me.

We just need to get into your account,

so you can

talk to your mom.

[Dale] Yeah, my mother's

been through a lot because of me.

I put her through hell.

She told me, "No son of mine

would ever take a life."

And it broke her heart.

I haven't seen my mother in 25 years,

and today I'm hoping to finally

get to speak to her face-to-face.

[video chat ringing]

-[ringing continues]

-Hello?

-Come on.

-[woman] Hello?

-There she is!

-There we go.

Hi, sis!

Hi, sis.

[Carole] Yay! [chuckles]

Hi, baby.

Hi, Mama.

God, it's good to see you.

[Dale's mom] God, it's good to see you

back and away from that place.

It's good. It's all good.

[inhales] It's okay.

[Dale's mom] I thank God every day,

Carole, for you.

I'm so glad you could be there

for him when I couldn't.

It's my honor.

[sniffs, exhales] Okay.

Let's get this under control here.

[chuckles] Good luck.

See, I told you I was old and fat now.

[Dale and Carole laughing]

-That comes with the territory.

-I ain't no spring chicken myself.

I know.

[sad music plays]

[Dale] Seeing my mother for the first time

after 25 years

and her seeing her child

free

was more precious

than life itself to me.

I mean, I can't stress

how overwhelming and amazing it is

to be able to see her and talk to her

at any time that I want to.

You know, because of technology.

It's awesome,

because she knows that I'm free now,

that she can reach out to me.

God, it's good to see you, though, Mama.

It's been a long time.

Yes, it has.

[voice trembles] We never thought

this day was gonna come.

No, we didn't.

I was afraid I was never gonna be able

to see this before I went to heaven.

-[Dale's mom sniffs]

-[sniffs]

-I love you, no matter what.

-I love you, too.

And I know I put you through hell,

and you didn't deserve that.

I ended up being the worst son

instead of being the best son

but from here on out,

I'm gonna be your best son.

I'm gonna make you proud of me

before you go to heaven.

[sniffs] I know you will, baby.

[soft piano music plays]

[Dale] The most important thing to me

is to make my mother proud.

What child doesn't want that?

It's really important to set

short-term, medium-term,

and long-term goals.

Years down the road, I wanna be stable,

working for a company.

I wanna get my own house.

I wanna have a 401(k) plan,

insurance, dental plan.2

And I wanna be able to start a ministry,

to be able to mentor to the kids

and the youth.

I want the ministry to really,

you know, soar and take off.

I wanna be a blessing,

because I've been a burden all my life.

It's time to give back.

[children chattering]

Being on house arrest,

to me it's just a journey,

it's another chapter.

To see this family

and how they're out interacting,

and the boy's playing around,

running, pushing this little truck.

This is beautiful.

That's a gift from God, to have children.

That's

That's all I ever wanted,

was to find someone, have a little girl.

I mean, maybe one day that might be me.

I might find someone to love.

I just gotta stay focused, stay positive.

So, I'm

trying to look for a job,

so hopefully I can be of value

to other people.

But, uh

I have to be patient.

[guitar music plays]

I'm excited to see

what they got for me today.

I just gotta be flexible at this point.

I just love to have options and choices

and to be able to finally start

to get my life back together.

In a perfect world today,

I'll sign on with a trucking company,

where I can be trained

and start work immediately.

So, I'm kind of looking forward to this.

[woman]

What type of job are you looking for?

Um, something to do with driving CDL.

-CDL? Okay.

-Yes, ma'am.

-You wanna be a truck driver?

-Yes.

My grandfather was a truck driver,

and I know it's good pay,

I love to travel,

and it's something on my heart

that I wanted to accomplish.

Have you had

truck driving experience before?

-Mm-mm.

-No? Okay.

-Do you have your certification?

-No.

Is that something

that you might want to do,

-is get a certification?

-Yes, ma'am.

And your work history?

Do you have a work history?

Um [sighs]

I've done a little bit of everything,

but nothing like driving.

Okay, what was the last job you had?

-Stocker at Kroger's in Arlington.

-Okay.

-And do you remember the date?

-1990?

-Yeah.

That was my last job.

I've been incarcerated for 30 years.

Okay.

[contemplative music plays]

[commotion over TV]

[Carole] k*ll him, he's trying to k*ll me.

-[Dale] I got it.

-[Carole] Okay.

[smashing over TV]

Good shot.

[Carole] All right.

Oh! There's one of 'em you gotta k*ll.

[Carole]

Gotta k*ll her.

Okay, you got all three of 'em now.

It's violent,

that's why I said if he didn't want

to play it, we could put something else.

But, yeah, it's

got a lot of violence in it.

That's why everybody in society

be talking about video games

-corrupting the youth.

-Their kids, yeah.

-The kids.

-Yeah.

[Dale] Technology is awesome,

but it's difficult.

I mean, even the games are difficult.

When you go up in level,

you have to go

and cash the levels in

to make you stronger for the next level.

It's

It's confusing.

[Dale] Because I'm on house arrest,

technology is particularly

important to me.

You gonna reach out for jobs

for employment.

That's my way of connecting

with the world for the next year.

But at the same time,

it's really overwhelming.

Detecting problems

Problem is, technology

is just too difficult.

Okay, "Check to see

if the problem is fixed."

-Okay.

-Did--

It said: "Click to see

if the problem is fixed," so I clicked it.

-Is it fixed?

-No, it is definitely not.

Everything's got a security measure on it.

They want a backup for a backup,

and they use your e-mail,

your phone number, password,

and if that don't work,

then you use your e-mail for the password.

You try that,

and it still doesn't connect.

You're like, "What's the sense

of asking me for the e-mail to verify

the phone number if

when I give it to you,

it's not allowing me to get in?"

When it gets to the point

where

you get that frustrated,

the best thing to do is to just

get away from it for a while

and go back to it later.

You gotta quit letting it beat you down.

It's just a computer.

It's not life and death.

[Carole] The last

I'd say, three or four days,

Dale has been very frustrated.

For him,

basically, the world kind of stood still

when he got locked up.

While out here, we just kept up with it,

we learned the technology, and so

he's got to learn it all of it.

It takes time.

It feels like

he wants to do everything by tomorrow,

and you can't do that.

There's not enough hours in the day.

Money is very tight right now,

simply because with an extra body

in the house,

the bills are going up,

and there's no extra money yet

coming in.

But we'll make it.

We'll make it.

He gets a job,

and everything will be fine.

As far as getting a job,

I don't know,

because he doesn't have any experience,

and I've been telling him

he needs to pace himself

and not try to put so much on his plate.

[soft dramatic music plays]

[Dale] Being limited in my movements

has really been hard.

I've been waiting three decades

to get my life back,

to make an impact, to do the right thing

and touch other people.

You know, for God.

And it's frustrating.

People can't understand.

When you want to give back,

and you want to love other people,

and you want to be around people.

That's why it bothers me so much

that I can't

socialize,

work in the community

and get to know people.

I mean, I'm very limited,

you know?

And, uh

[deep sighs]

I know things will only get better

but it's just frustrating.

[Carole] Is there anything you wanna get

on the way home, or just wanna go home?

We can get, uh

barbecue?

Uh, there's pizza.

Yesterday was half-priced hamburgers,

-and I forgot.

-I'm gonna share something with you

-that you're probably not even aware of.

-When?

-Right now?

-You see that sign there?

-What sign?

-Subway sign.

Subway? Yeah.

For the rest of my life,

every time I see that sign,

it brings back that night.

Oh, really?

[Dale sniffs]

[Carole] The hardest thing for us to do

is to forgive ourselves.

I need to learn to forgive myself,

and I haven't learned how to do that yet.

It'll come in time.

It just takes

a while.

Every time I see that, it just

It just reopens the wound.

[tender piano music plays]

[Carole] Dale knows

that what he did was wrong,

and nobody can punish him

as severely as he punishes himself.

He is so remorseful over it.

And that's just something

that he'll carry with him

for the rest of his life.

It'll always be a part of his DNA.

All of this and everything

that I went through

is because of my choices.

Because of who I was.

But I'm no longer that person.

For the last 30 years

I've been

villainized,

called a monster,

an animal, someone unworthy to live.

That's never been the true case.

I'm not an animal.

I'm not some monster.

What people generally don't understand

is the true story of April

in 1990.

They look at it as a robbery-homicide.

"He did it for the money",

but that is not what it was about.

[dog barking in the distance]

[slow guitar music playing]

[Forest] "Arlington restaurant employee

slain during apparent robbery.

John W. Zeltner, 31, of Arlington,

was pronounced dead at the scene."

-Senseless m*rder.

-Yeah.

Had no reason for it.

He did it just to do it.

When he k*lled my brother,

that was no accident, he didn't--

The trigger--

He didn't flip on the trigger.

You don't pull a trigger

six times accidentally,

you know, it's just--

That was no accident.

So, that's a statement.

That's a statement, you know?

You wanna k*ll, it only takes one b*llet.

You wanna make a statement?

sh**t it five more times.

[soft guitar music plays]

[John] For the longest time,

I thought there was more to it.

For the longest time.

I thought because he was g*y,

they wanted to k*ll him.

[John] Back in the late '80s, early '90s,

people were prejudiced.

I thought maybe that's what it was,

you know?

That because he was g*y,

and he was open about it,

they didn't like it.

That's what I thought.

But I was wrong, you know?

But that was just me being mad.

Apparently, that's all it was. Just money.

[Dale] People believe that

they understand what happened

in April 1990.

But going through trial,

no one genuinely knew what was going on.

No one knew the whole story,

because I never told anyone.

Truthfully, the only one

that really knows,

is the victim, God, and I.

It wasn't until after my father died

that I realized that

in order for me to be the man of God,

I have to tell the story.

I have to be totally transparent.

People believe it was

a robbery-homicide for the money,

but that's farthest from the truth.

It wasn't about the robbery.

The robbery was to cover up

the true intention of the homicide.

The reason that I went to the store

was to k*ll John.

I k*lled him, because

he tried to blackmail me

into a h*m* relationship.

[closing music plays]