A Grand Mockery (2024)

[bunniefuu]

Dear Sal.

Good afternoon.

It is 15:23 and I'm sitting

with the Tony's on the bench

on the hillside beneath

the frangipani.

A dry wind is blowing

and dead leaves

scuttle across the

expanse of graves.

A lorikeet rockets past my head

with a singular

ear-piercing shriek.

I see a few crows...

...flying in a strange

sideways manner,

lurching against the gale.

A cloud of pigeons erupts

from a nearby treetop

and their trajectory seems

to work favourably

with the winds

for they hurtle by with

a speed I have rarely

perceived before

in pigeon-kind.

I marinate in the sunshine.

In the salubrious secretions

of the departed.

Two white c*ck

cross the horizon

where Brisbane lies

baking in the distance.

I think of bushfires.

I think of our country

going up in flames.

Now sitting here with the

accumulated jars

beneath Tony's bench,

I ponder the expansion

of our cemetery postal system.

From Vyvyan's row to Wendelin

in the pine grove,

James and Elizabeth beneath

the rivened ironbark tree

to Tony's lookout,

I feel as though we've both

gotten to know

the cemetery so well,

the resident sleepers may have

already put aside plots for us.

Perhaps departed

promotions await.

See, I just find the Karens

hilarious most of the time.

Yeah, I don't know.

There's been a few...

Been a few issues

with, uh, coffee.

-Morning.

-Morning.

Ah, coffee machine on yet?

-Yes.

-Could you get me a long black?

Ah-- Uh, yeah--

- Morning.

- Morning Josie, how you doing?

Yeah, good, you?

I served a woman,

and she asked for her coffee

but specifically asked me

not to make it. And--

Ah, coffee machine on yet?

You're living with a junky,

you're living with

a speed addict,

you're living with a sl*t,

you're living with a thief.

And you've got her up there.

Have a go you mug

and see how far you get.

You're the one

that carted her up there.

You're the one that's

got her up there, not me.

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Good evening.

Shortly, the man who says

he's living in a dead body.

Are you...

...in-- in pain?

Yes I was. Yeah.

Here, let me get that.

Thank you, Josie.

Thank you for having me.

Yeah, that's quite a--

it's quite a wound.

I fell heavily.

'Cause I had a bottle of wine

in my right hand, and I, um...

- ...landed heavily on my left.

- Yeah.

I-- I had a blackout.

And I woke up in--

under the trees in the garden.

Mmm.

And then I started to

try to get out of it.

And I-- I couldn't

pull myself up.

- That was-- That was

probably from the--

- Oh, Jesus!

the tree.

And when I was

in AA this morning,

I had my hand on my leg.

And I didn't realise it

but all the blood

was coagulating on my leg.

- f*ck.

- And I thought...

...if anyone sees it in AA

they're gonna go,

"What have you--

What have you been up to?"

Is it-- can I?

Do you, uh...

Out of it for at least

an hour or two.

And then my ear gets cut off.

You made it back,

I heard you make it back here.

Is the camel?

I feel like the camel's

just being a camel, you know?

So the spirit world

is realer than this world.

...created was like,

coming into existence

somewhere else.

That's s-- stupid, isn't it?

No...

Yeah, just get me

a beer, thanks.

We're-- We're all--

We're all shut, sorry mate.

All-- all shut for the evening.

I've got cash,

I can pay you with cash.

All the-- All the tills

are shut down, we're...

-Closed the bar. Sorry mate.

-Well, the machine's still on.

Yeah, I-- I can't--

I can't sell you

anything, we're--

We're shut, for--

for the evening,

we shut-- shut pretty early

these days.

Sorry.

Yeah I just wanted a beer,

they're right there.

Don't know

what to tell you.

Sorry. Eh...

You know, you can tell--

- You can tell what was in--

in the--

- No!

the-- the gentleman's stomach.

So it's like, he--

he comes to the bar.

And is like,

"Give me the big popcorn.

Give me the big Pepsi."

And then he consumes it all.

- And then...

- ...vomits it

into the cup

at the front of the cinema!

And then just leaves it there,

and he's like:

"I'm gonna leave

this little nugget."

I thought a cinema job

was like a walk in the park.

No, no. Strange people...

Strange people.

Strange people

come to the movies

at all hours

of the day and night.

Because they're sitting

alone in the darkness,

-they can do what they want.

-Oh, my God...

I told you about that--

-that row of kids that

-I guess I--

I walked in,

all, like, fellating each other

- right? I told you that one!

- What?

-Yeah, people don't realise!

People don't--

-Oh my God!

- It's a quiet world of

depravity in there.

I hope it's okay.

- Yeah, it's okay.

- It's o--

-Okay.

-Yeah, this is okay.

Oh, you guys are doing so well.

Banana... What's this one?

Another banana?

Yeah, but it's

a blue banana.

You wanna use that green?

Yeah! Okay, I've got to

focus on my dinosaur.

Right.

This is the

start of a few rounds,

and I think

the worst of it is yet to come.

We'll take a look

at the radar, in our

full weather wrap...

Exercise is the key,

not only to physical health

but also peace of mind.

Dennis is here today to show us

how we can have both a healthy

body and a peaceful mind.

All without leaving

our chair or couch,

- d-- good to see you, buddy!

- G'day James,

that's right, look,

would you believe I'm actually

- exercising right now?

- Yeah, right.

Just as I'm talking to you.

Because passive sitting

- really is a k*ller.

- Huh?

Did you know that

studies have linked

being sedentary

with being overweight?

"So how you doing Josie?

What's new?

Tell me about your life."

- Thanks for asking,

um, I'm-- I'm good.

Just been working a lot.

Mostly--

mostly nights, but that's--

that's okay. Been busy, just...

...drawing and...

...getting drunk.

"What about, ah-- What about...

...what's her face?

Your-- Your lady?"

Nelly!

"Yeah, yeah, um..."

Yeah, she's good. She's good.

She's

busy as well.

Working a lot, like me.

Anyway, enough

about me, how are--

What's new with you?

"Ah, you know me, Josie,

just sitting here,

f*cking staring at the TV.

Waiting for the-- for the

icy embrace of death."

You don't mean that.

How is this, anyway?

Looks disgusting.

Oh yeah, that's disgusting.

I'm sorry! It was on special.

All right, all right.

Stop playing around. Come on.

There we go.

Snug as a bug.

You good? You comfy?

What are you thinking about?

Tell me a story.

Tell me something.

Bad to think.

- What?

- Bad to think.

What about when you, ah,

tried to break into that

apartment downstairs?

Can you tell me that one again?

I love that story.

You know it off by heart.

Yeah, but I like hearing it.

- You won't tell me?

- Nah...

All right, well...

If you're all good, I'll, uh--

I'll leave you to it.

You good?

All right. I'll come

see you, uh, day after tomorrow.

That's a long time.

And his beautiful wife

Eleanor Gertude Oberthur,

who was aged 85.

So she outlived him by a year.

All right.

I'll send for you.

"Hey Josie. Still here?"

Yep, still here.

"How long's it been now?

Yeah, right, so you've been here

a long time?"

Of course,

I've f*cking been here

a long time, I'm always here.

Dear Sal, I could

tell you its name

but if I had to name it,

it wouldn't be good.

All right, it's, ah... 16:46.

The sun's setting.

The clouds are turning orange.

And I can see the

little birds darting about

and I can hear

a c*ck in the distance.

I love the c*ck, Gary!

I love the c*ck, Gary.

"That's nice, Josie, what

f*ck' cinema am I in today?"

Oh, f*ck...

What a beautiful f*ck' night.

What if this is it, you know?

This is as good as it gets.

Drinking wine with

all my dead friends.

You know?

Beautiful place to be.

Beautiful place to be.

f*ck. My God,

who the f*ck am I?

Worthless...

Worthless contribution

to society.

What the f*ck else

am I gonna do?

Yep, head on through, your film

will start momentarily.

Enjoy the show.

"Hey Josie."

"Hey Josie..." f*ck.

"At first he would

not be comforted.

But when she brought him tea

and very thick

hot buttered toast,

he started eating again.

And they had many

interesting talks together.

She told him that

she had an elderly aunt

who was the washerwoman

at the prison.

So she suggested that if Toa--"

Very tired.

-"That if Toad--"

-I've got work in the morning.

Just let me finish this one bit.

"That if Toad

gave his lady a little money

she might be willing to

let him have one more of her

dresses, so he

could escape from the castle!"

Sorry.

Alright, do ya--

You're done? You've expired?

Can you tap--

can you do the blind?

Thanks.

- Get the light.

- Uh-huh.

It's okay.

Dear Sal... 16:40.

I'm sitting in the cemetery.

-Atop the grave of

Elizabeth Murhead.

-Dear Sal...

Dear Sal--

7:40... How are you

this morning, Elizabeth?

AM, on the morning

of the eighth.

-Dear Sal...

-Barefoot in the cemetery.

-Dear Sal. Dear Sal.

-Sitting with Mark Roberts...

- ...with a cup of coffee.

- Dear Sal.

- atop the grave

- Good afternoon to you, Sal.

Then sugar's the third

ingredient, but it's

one percent sugar.

- If New Order fans don't know who Peter Hook is...

- -Right.

I think it needs to be

even colder, guys.

I think it needs to be ice-cold.

They thought

that it was their pal

in like a bald cap.

Oh no!

Oh, dear...

Josie! We were just talking

about Farrah Fawcett.

She died of cancer of the an*s.

And it feels excruciating.

Yeah, like giving birth

through your p*nis.

-Hey did you get a drink?

-Yeah, yeah, yep.

-Okay.

-Wine-- wine in a mug.

- Nice.

- -Oh, you two are such a beautiful couple.

- Thank you.

- Josie, uh, an*s, um...

...and...

Well, we actually were just

talking about Farrah Fawcett

dying of a-- an*s cancer.

You just yelled, "an*s."

Oh!

Um, okay, we're one seat short.

...at this-- at this

woman. And I thought...

...she had the most pinned eyes

I've ever seen in my life.

I thought, "She is--

she's a sex worker,

or a f*cking lawyer."

She was loud, too.

You know, when you're in a bar,

and you're just tryna

enjoy yourself at the bar,

and somebody else

is really f*ck' loud.

But she looked like

she had snake eyes.

We went outside, all of a sudden

her eyes go from snake eyes...

...and they open up!

What happens when we die, Josie?

What-- What happens?

We just make a tree or...?

Do we just make a tree?

Is that what happens or...?

Why are we all

so scared of death?

You-- You're getting pissed off

at me, aren't you, an*s?

Are you, or...?

Honey?

Hi.

Hi!

Um...

Are you--

Are you okay?

- Yes. Sorry.

- Uh-- You can tell me.

No I'm good. I just needed

my little-- I just needed--

- I just needed a moment, I'm sorry.

- I'll be-- -Yes.

- I'll be back out in a sec.

- -I understand

that you would just be like,

"Don't wanna do the thing..."

But also,

they're so nice and I...

...guess I'm also trying

to say that I...

- I'm not meaning to -...

- am having a really good

-taint your nice time.

-time...

I'll come back out

in a second, I just--

- I just--

- Do you know

how much I love you?

I love you, too.

I'm good. I'll s-- I'll come out

in a sec, okay?

I love it when we hang out.

Yeah, uh, me too.

I'll see you in a second.

Okay.

Here you go, Josie.

I'm so sorry

for calling you an*s.

It's-- It's just the two of us,

we don't need another

f*cking three-paper joint.

Mmm, okay.

-Alright.

-Two papers will suffice, right?

A two-paper joint.

Can you do that?

-Whatever you say, Josie.

-Can you do that for me?

- ...taking your sweet-a*s time

rolling this f*cking--

- I will k*ll you.

- I will f*cking k*ll you.

- No, you won't,

you love me.

No, I could k*ll you, though.

Tell me I'm a work

of art!

You're an as*h*le!

- You're a f*cking as*h*le!

- I'm an an*s, right?!

Huh-- I gave it to you.

Oh, no. I got it, I got it.

I f*ck' bet you do. I don't

f*ck' have it, you took mine.

Let's f*ck' light it up.

Give me the f*ck' lighter!

Do you seriously wanna

f*ck' smoke that

whole thing to yourself?

'Cause you'll be wasted...

...and you'll pass out

in your own piss.

-No! I've never passed out ever

-Give me that f*ck' joint!

-in my life.

-Seriously.

-Give me that f*ck' joint.

-Oh God...

We need to relax here.

Who else agrees with that?

Everyone else raise your hand

if you agree with that?

Nobody's raising their hand.

It's because you

were hoarding it.

f*ck' bogarting it.

- Bogart?

- Humphrey Bogarting?

You were bogarting it.

We're alive...

I'm pretty sure. I mean...

You're pretty sure?

Yeah, well, you know, physics

can't actually explain

what we're actually doing here.

-What you mean?

-I could actually be st--

sitting here by myself.

You may not actually be here.

-Maybe I'm not.

-And physics--

Quantum physics or--

No, not quantum physics.

Physics actually says that!

-Physics--

-Physics says what,

that I'm not here?

Well yeah, we ain't--

Nobody's here...

-It's--

-What the f*ck does that mean,

"nobody's f*cking here?"

It's a construction

within your own head.

What's a construction?

That I'm here is a construction.

-How the f*ck you know--

-Yeah, that you live. Yeah.

-Oh God...

-I could be anyone.

Get the f*ck away

from me with that sh*t!

...you have lost your honor!

All over a junky f*cking sl*t,

and a f*cking thief!

You f*cking horror.

You have lost your honor!

By taking her up there.

f*ck! Because you suck c**t.

Leave me the f*cking hell

alone, you horror!

Listen you turd! All I did was

put the f*cking sh*t up there

for her, all right?

You can f*ck off!

You're getting kicked out.

You've lost your

honor here in New Farm!

All the way.

Oh, I just got

red wine in my eye.

How am I looking?

Pretty... Pretty good.

Tell me I'm a work of art.

Tell me I'm a work of art!

Say it!

"You're a work of art, Josie."

You're

a work of art, Josie.

Yeah, what-- what else could you aspire to be in life?

Really?

- f*ck! No, we're good.

Keep going.

Oop, that's the ashtray.

Am I still a work of art?

Yep.

- I don't wanna--

- Love me!

Well, uh, I, ah--

I can't believe

that I've done it.

I've never...

done an abstract before.

All my stuff is surreal.

Well, I mean,

this is pretty surreal, right?

I don't know why

this gesture seems appropriate

to my, uh, appearance,

right now.

Am I a work of art?

'Course you're

a work of art!

Thank you.

But God did a better job

than me, though.

Did he? I don't think he did.

Ugh!

Shh! Shh!

My s-- My seed, Jim!

- Ohh, wow...

- Oh!

-She's beautiful!

-Yes...

Can I cut the cord?

Yes! Cut it!

What are we gonna call her?

- Eve.

- Eve! My beautiful Eve!

Hi.

- How you doing?

- Good, how are you?

Good, good.

Do you recognize

any of these people?

That's what he said.

"Do you recognize

any of these people?"

No? Well you will.

I'm sorry!

Come with me.

I'll take you away from here.

I don't know where

we're gonna go, but...

Just another beer, thanks.

Beer-beer.

Bar's closed.

Well, the machine's still on.

They're all off.

Well, I've got cash.

Can't sell you a beer.

Come on, they're right there.

Bar's closed. Sorry.

Sir?

Josie, can you flip the record?

Josie!

Oh, my God, it's like

a thousand degrees in here.

Is it?

Yeah it is.

Are you melting?

No, I'm cold.

You don't look well.

I'm okay.

Really?

Yeah.

Okay, well, dinner's ready.

If you wanna come eat.

I can't eat.

What is going on with you?

Nothing!

I'm just really f*cking cold,

and I just wanna sit by the fire

and thaw myself out.

Is that okay?

Yep.

Sure.

So there's nothing

going on with you?

Nothing you wanna tell me?

No.

-All right, I'm off.

-Yep. No worries.

-You all good?

-Yeah. Yeah, I'll be alright.

Wasn't too busy tonight.

No, no. It was pretty cruisy

for a Friday night.

Oh, um, cinema ten,

the bins, um,

stink really bad.

Like, someone's...

...spewed in them.

-Right.

-Yeah, I hate to ask,

but you wouldn't mind

having a look at them would ya?

Might just need

a bit of a rinse out.

- Yeah. Sure.

- Thanks man.

We've just got that function on

in the morning,

and we can't have the

whole place reeking of vomit.

That-- that-- that makes sense.

I'll get onto it.

Legend.

Ah, well, I'm gonna take off.

-Yep.

-Good luck.

Yep. See ya.

How's your night been?

Yeah, not too bad.

Yourself?

All quiet.

- Have a good one.

- Thank you.

- Have you?

- I have guinea pigs

at my house.

-Guinea pigs. Amazing.

Guinea pigs? What are they?

- They're--

- They're so cute.

Like, what

do you advise me, to do?

It can only come from, um,

another energy.

On that level.

You've-- You--

You really can't do a lot,

on this level.

Look, do you know the

closest way you get done?

Get-- Get interreaction? Get--

Ah, what's the word...

It's through, sexual relations.

- Yeah, right.

- Now,

did a woman come

into your life in that period?

Or someone come into your life?

Ah-- uh...

- It's hard to say.

- -Start a new relationship with anyone?

Not that-- No--

- Not that you're aware of.

-Not that I'm aware of.

'Cause usually it's--

it's-- comes from an outer

force.

- You know what I mean?

- Yeah.

And it's hard to

rid yourself of it.

It's like a spear.

It's a spiritual spear,

right? That's been put into ya.

- Yeah.

- Leaves a hole...

And they access

through that hole.

It's like a fa-- fe--

festering sore...

that's always topped up with

negative energies.

If we knew what happens

in sexual relations,

-we wouldn't do it.

-Yeah...

Hey, I've been celibate

for 25 years.

Wow.

See, sexual energy

is the strongest energy

on the planet.

- Yeah.

- And that's the way they can

grab ya.

So...

And-- oh, I have to remo--

I have to say this

to you, too.

Every seduction

is done in the spirit

before it's done on the--

on Earth.

See, the spirit world is--

is a more hostile world...

Uh, s-- sorry, it's just as

hostile as this world on Earth.

The four heads I told you about.

Do you recognize

any of these people?

- Well, the ten heads,

four that I know.

Right?

Well, like I said to you before,

I'm dealing with someone

with ten heads.

By the power of

Hecate, I demand this daemon...

...free-- be free

from daemon s--

Oh, sorry.

I'm sorry.

Everything is gone now.

By the power of Hecate!

By the power of Lucifer!

By the power of Satan!

I state! Leave this soul!

Ouch!

That's all right! Little bit

of blood doesn't hurt.

Sad story, isn't it?

Hm-- No.

f*ck...

Mr. Josie!

Hey mate, how you doing?

Ah, yep, you're in cinema five,

just head right down the end

take a right, you're in seat M9.

Hey mate. Hey guys, I've just

gotta check your tickets,

sorry--

Yep-- Ah yep, you're in

cinema six head straight-- Yep.

Okay, yep. Hey guys,

how you good--

how you-- how you doing?

You're in cinema seven,

just head down the end,

it's on the left there,

you're in seat H9.

Hey there, how you doing?

How you doing? You're in, uh,

cinema six, just head--

- head straight down

the end. Go right in.

- Alright.

Hey mate, how you doing?

Yep, cinema six,

-go-- yep, go for it. Yep.

-Good.

Mr. Josie.

How are you this evening?

I'm good.

What film are you seeing?

Are you keeping out of

trouble and plight?

Mr. Josie.

I'm with child.

Meet... Ruth IV.

Say... Was it?

Oh, really? Well don't you find

this place unwholesome?

Don't you find this place...

...awful?

Ooh!

Oi, oi! Hey, can we get

the air con in here,

it's f*cking boiling!

What do you think?

He's not how I imagined.

What were you imagining?

He's just so... pretty.

He's a work of art, isn't he?

I've seen him naked,

he's got a gorgeous c*ck.

I bet he does.

I can smell his loins from here.

All right, Mr. Josie. I'm off.

Okay. No worries.

You okay, Mr. Josie?

Yeah.

Wasn't too busy tonight.

No, no, it was pretty cruisy

for a Friday night.

Oh, ah...

-The bin in cinema ten...

-Yeah?

It turned into

a liquified corruption.

-Yeah, I hate to ask ya.

-Yup.

Thanks man.

Sorry about that. We've just--

we've got that function on

in the morning, and, ah,

-we can't have the whole

place reeking--

-No, I'll get onto it.

Legend.

Ah...

-All the best.

-See ya.

Dear Sal.

The time is 15:23

and I am kneeling

before the fountain of sadness.

Wiping up the beer-infused piss

of a thousand

discharging c*ck.

I feel as though my skin

has absorbed the fluids

through some kind of

piss osmosis

and the next time I weep

I may weep tears of piss!

My boss delights

in facilitating

these transfusions,

and his piss

is the most golden of them all.

I imagine him

sitting down in the office

watching the CCTV footage

of me cleaning the urinal

and he's--

he's furiously masturbating.

Expression

of disbelief on his face,

like he can't even believe

how turned on he is.

Like at any moment he might

wrench his own c*ck off

with the sheer ferocity

of his desperate pumpings!

Nice job on

the bin in cinema ten, man.

Lavender perfume

was a nice touch.

Ooh!

Only a few more to go.

And you're done.

Oh dear!

Hi, Mr. Josie.

Would you like a beer?

...very angry, and

decided to drown the people.

The thunder began

to roll and crash.

There was a terrible wind...

Then the sea came crashing

over the ranges from the north.

According to

the Genesis account,

the Earth was struck

by an immense catastrophe

a few thousand years ago, when

almost all life was destroyed,

and the Earth was flooded.

Only Noah's family...

This is

Aileen Johnson of

I think you will agree

with me that the world

has changed drastically

in recent years.

Unfortunately,

a very real problem

remains in many people's lives.

The problem of tension.

And tension, we find,

has increased

with modern day living.

Please don't expect

immediate results.

It is not magic.

It could take several days,

or even weeks,

depending on how you respond.

If you feel you are

becoming tense,

don't carry on until you are

at screaming point.

It will only build up.

Many people suffer

from insomnia

and resort to sleeping pills.

You feel them sinking down.

With each breath,

you let yourself go.

You will find yourself becoming

more confident, serene,

and contented.

Close your eyes.

And cut yourself off

from the outside world.

- You are letting go.

- f*ck you.

And giving in.

Dear Sal.

It is 7:30, and I am strolling

down the block

in the bright morning sunlight.

Listening to my friends,

the morning birds,

sing in the new day.

I haven't heard

from you in a while.

I hope you're okay.

I miss soaking in your

beautiful words, they...

...always give me such

a burning hard-on.

I feel the gentleman downstairs

swelling up at the mere thought

of holding another

one of your eloquent missives.

The bulge threatens to...

burst through my trunk fronts.

Please write me again, Sal.

Last night I had the

most beautiful dream.

I dreamt I was in a vast field

with all the people

who had loved me

throughout my life.

They were all wearing

little matching outfits

and I was on my knees

and they had

formed an orderly queue

so they could each

take a turn at f*cking me

in the mouth!

Mr. an*s!

f*ck!

Didn't think I'd see you

back here.

Good luck.

What the f*ck do you want?

What are you doing?

I'm just really f*cking cold

and I just

wanna sit by the fire

and thaw myself out!

Is that okay?

That's not how it goes!

- All right, you

groovy travellers,

next up we have

The Josie Experiment

with their new trance hit

"Salut Da wh*re"!

Hey there, Mr. Josie.

How ya doing?

Do you have a sturdier vessel?

Yeah, you bet.

Mmm.

Champ Blue's.

Your favorite.

How's that taste?

Here, I'll top

you up there, Mr. Josie.

I don't have any money.

They're on the house.

How's that there, Mr. Josie?

Want a top up?

Yep.

Oh...

Want a top up?

Right?

Why do you drink?

f*ck off.

Thank you.

f*ck man, I can't drink

this wine fast enough.

Those big brown eyes

They just hypnotize

I can't disguise

All my love and surprise

That big white smile

Seems to last all the while

And you light up the skies

When you look in my eyes

When I feel down

When I feel lonely

You're always there

You're my one and only

Honey, I know

That our love will grow

I'll never let you go

I just love you so

Those big brown eyes

They just hypnotize

I can't disguise

All my love and surprise

That big white smile

Seems to last all the while

And you light up the skies

When you look in my eyes

When I feel down

When I feel lonely

You're always there

You're my one and only

...a show with Wolfman Jack.

Who was a great,

great disc jockey.

...the-- the Raspini Brothers.

And they left their job

and became full-time jugglers.

- Now they're the top

two jugglers in the world.

They do this.

Disgusting!

I've missed you.

I know we only just met but...

...I've missed you.

Let's get out of this place.

Let's quit this paltry misery.

Suicide.

No. No, not suicide. I mean...

Let's get out of here.

Let's quit the f*cking dances,

the booze, the rooms, the roofs.

This! Quit that.

Discard the stained tablecloth

of man and return to the wood.

I've been condemned to death.

I expire in the morning.

What do you mean?

I upset the cart of Mr. Fig.

His grocery lay

all over the road.

People don't hang for groceries.

No. Drowned.

I may be deformed and

half-rotted through myself,

but I will not tolerate

deception.

We should wed tomorrow.

I'll be drowned.

The drowned don't wed?

Oh... Dear Sal!

Oh, dear!

Oh, boy. Dear Sal!

Oh, dear...

Oh, dear Sal...

Oh, dear Sal...

Dear Sal.

Dear, dear Sal!

Oh, dear--

Oh, dear Sal!

Oh, dear Sal!

- Oh, dear Sal!

- Oh, dear Sal!

Dear Sal.

The time is unnoted

as my watch has stopped.

I am lying spread-eagled

upon a bed of wet bracken

staring up at the

verdant canopy,

waiting for my

forest nymph friends

to come and wash the

filth from my flesh.

Maybe they'll sing me a lullaby

with their delightful

sing-song voices.

I never heard from you again.

Now I feel like I'm

on a boat without a sail,

set helplessly adrift on an

endless ocean of septic semen.

I lurch about the deck of my

paltry vessel

and try not to hurl

as the sun is just peeking

over the distant horizon

like the head of some

gargantuan burning phallus.

I resign myself to

the incomprehensible

bowel movements of the abyss.

I care not for

what shores await,

be there shores at all!

All notions of homeland

have left me,

for I cannot remember

what home was like.

Perhaps this septic sea

was always my home, and...

...land was but a dream.

Now I'm waking up and...

...I'm beginning to see through

the stained veil of time.

I see hordes

of trolls all lined up

and frantically masturbating

into the precipice at

the end of the world.

I see flocks of chimeras

fellating themselves

in great spirals as they

move across the sky.

I can hear the tearing of

the oceans myriad vulvas

all giving birth at once,

and the shrieking

of the outraged progeny,

who immediately commence

feasting on each other

with their puckered

toothless mouths!

I see darkness...

seeing itself.

I see the c*m of 10,000 giants

flooding across the land

swallowing up everyone

and everything

and everyone is drowning!

Everyone is drowning!

But I have a boat.

I am alone but...

...I have a boat.

Now, I hear my forest

nymph friends

coming to sing me to sleep.

Their tiny c*ck showering me

in salubrious golden piss.

Washing away the filth.

Filling my eyes.

Filling my lungs.

Now I'm...

...swimming.

I'll write to you tomorrow.

Your friend always.