Challenge, The (2003)

[bunniefuu]

Hurry, Shane, they're gaining on us.
You can do it, just don't look down.

Shane!

- Shane!
- I can't do it.

You have to.
Our future's in your hands.

I can't.

GIRL: Okay, we don't look like
your typical action heroes.

So how did two city girls like
us end up in the Mexican desert...

...suspended from a bridge
without cell phones?

Well, it all started a few months back
with this very popular TV show.

ANNOUNCER:
The Challenge.

Where students compete
for college scholarships.

Daring tests
of endurance and knowledge.

Driven by the desire to win...

...these warriors
continuously and fearlessly...

...stretch the envelope,
testing their limits, facing their fears...

...surviving on their
instinctual strength of will.

But what you have to ask yourself is:
Are you ready for The Challenge?

The Challenge.
Thursday night at 9, 8 central.

The Challenge.
How can I help you? Hold, please.

Yes, I just watched the promo.
I think it's a good spot.

It's got heat. Yes, I know
that ratings are down.

You know what?
Trust me. Ciao, ciao.

We're cooked unless we get
these ratings up.

- Max.
- Yeah.

I finished reviewing these
audition tapes...

...and I think you
should look at these.

Hi, I'm Shane Dalton from L.A.,
and I'm ready for The Challenge.

Shane.

Lizzie.

I'm Elizabeth Dalton
from Washington, D.C...

...and I'm ready for The Challenge.

I don't get it. She's got
a split personality?

- That is so sad she can't go to college.
- Twins, Max. They're twins.

Look, Max, their parents are divorced.
Shane lives with her mom in L.A.

Lizzie, with her father in D.C.
The girls can't stand each other.

Nothing in common. She's into ambition,
she's into nutrition.

This one loves a big, juicy steak.
Vegetarian.

You bring each one on the show
without telling the other.

It's on-camera confrontation.
It's instant ratings, Max.

Marcus, you are a genius.

Come here.

I am promoting you
to head intern.

Max, I'm the only intern.

Yeah, well, you know what?
Don't complain. You just got promoted.

MARCUS:
Yeah, we're going in 10 seconds.

WOMAN: All right, everybody,
let's get ready to sh**t, please.

And cameras ready.
In three, two...

Go, go.

And we're rolling.

ANNOUNCER: Nestled between
the dry Mexican desert...

...and the beautiful waters
of the Pacific Ocean...

...lies the luxurious
Fiestamericana Grande Hotel...

...in Los Cabos, Mexico,
the site of The Challenge.

These warriors will be competing
for college scholarships...

...testing themselves
and their comrades...

...pushing the envelope
under the blazing Mexican sun.

Only the strong will survive.

Welcome, Challenge warriors.

First Campfire Council is in one hour.

You will find out
who will be your teammates...

...and who will be your enemies
for The Challenge.

- And cut. We're out.
- Excuse me.

Hi. There's only seven of us.
Is someone missing?

Yeah, our eighth member's
a little delayed.

Hello? Hello?

I can't get a signal down here.

Sir, if you could hurry,
por favor.

I'm a half-hour late,
and I'm never late.

Last time I was late was in 1986, when
I was born. That was my sister's fault.

You know, she had that umbilical cord
thingy wrapped around my neck.

Sorry I'm talking so much.

I think I had too many cappuccinos at
the layover in Dallas, know what I mean?

Are you sure you wanted
to make that right?

[WOMAN SPEAKING
OVER RADIO]

All right, stand by.
We are up in 60 seconds.

Nothing like a campfire when
it's 100 degrees out.

I think it's for dramatic effect.

- I'm Adam.
- Hi, I'm Shane.

Shane? That's a funky name.

- I like it.
- Thanks.

My dad had a thing for old Westerns.

Good thing he didn't
name you Trigger.

Welcome, warriors, to your first
Campfire Council on The Challenge.

Two teams. Seven challenges.
Seven totems.

For each event, the winning team
secures a wooden totem.

At the end of the week, the team
with the most totems is the winner.

The rules: curfew, 10 p.m.

No romantic entanglements.

Any infraction of these rules will result
in disqualification from the next event.

Tonight you'll be broken into two teams.

Team Aztec and Team Mayan.

And the first Aztec is...

...Kelly.

ANNOUNCER:
Kelly "The Terminator" Turman.

Competitive swimmer, competitive
climber. Just plain competitive.

I prepared for this by eating
a c*ck, two worms and a live fish.

Team Mayan, Anthony.

ANNOUNCER: Anthony Rigoletti.
This one is macho, fearless, hungry.

I wanna go to a college
with a good culinary program.

I'm gonna be like
that chef, Emeril. Bam!

Team Aztec, JJ.

ANNOUNCER:
Janice Josephine, a.k.a. JJ.

Big dreams wrapped into a tiny package.
Confident as an avalanche.

I am a triple threat.
Singer, dancer, actress.

Team Mayan, Justin.

- All right.
ANNOUNCER: Justin Tyler.

Lithe, agile. This skateboard champ
will grind you down.

MIT, dude. Astrophysics. Solid.

- Ha! A-Man and the J-Man.
- Yeah.

Team Aztec, Charles.

ANNOUNCER: Charles P. Benjamin.
Strong in body and mind.

- This Charles is in charge.
- I have a knack for reading people.

It's a gift I want to share
when I become a psychotherapist.

Team Mayan, Shane.

ANNOUNCER: Shane Dalton, our L.A.
woman. Out to change the world.

But do not let that sweet
exterior fool you.

These are my Zen counting beads.
They help me meditate.

I try to be in harmony with nature.

Team Aztec, Adam.

ANNOUNCER:
Adam Booth. The Big A.

Athletic, adventurous,
Abercrombie & Fitch.

I'm thinking I'll go to Stanford.
Journalism, all the way.

- And finally...
- Wait! Hold on. Wait, I'm here.

- Team Mayan...
- I'm sorry, I'm never late.

- ...Lizzie.
- Lizzie?

- Shane?
- Dude, those chicks could be sisters.

- What are you doing here?
- What are you doing?

Dude, they are sisters.

- Is this some kind of joke?
- How'd this happen?

I quit.

- You can't quit. I just quit.
- Then I'll stay.

- There's no sense in both of us leaving.
- Wait a minute.

You tricked me into thinking you
were quitting so that I would quit first.

Oh, reverse psychology. Clever.

- I changed my mind. I'm not quitting.
- Well, neither am I.

I'm in.

You knew and you let this happen?
How could you do this to me, Dad?

[MAN SPEAKING
OVER CELL PHONE]

Now, hold on a second, Lizzie. Hold on.
I think it'd be really good for you two.

Hello? Dad?

Mom, this is blocking my chakras.

[WOMAN SPEAKING
OVER PHONE]

- We were afraid you'd back out.
- Well, you would've been right.

Well, I guess you girls
will just have to work it out.

MARCUS: This bungalow is gonna be
your home base.

My name is Marcus.
I'm your show liaison.

You'll notice there's cameras
out by the pool...

...and in the common areas,
like that one.

Bedrooms and bathrooms are private.

Guys, you're gonna be
on national television.

Don't let the cameras catch
you doing anything embarrassing.

You'll be treated to dinner.

This will give you a chance to get
to know your friends and your enemies.

I will see you all in one hour.

- Let's play ball.
- You're gonna room with your sister?

Yep. Talk about a challenge.

- She's just an uptight...
- Birkenstock-wearing...

- ...cow-eating...
- ...tree-hugging...

- ...type A personality.
- ...sprouthead.

She's, like, all mellow
and hugging trees and animals.

Sharing a house for a week
won't change the fact...

- ...that we have nothing in common.
- Nothing. Nothing.

- And did I say "nothing"?
- Nothing.

- Why do you get the window bed?
- Because I need the fresh air.

Well, I like fresh air too.

You live in an apartment
with the windows sealed...

...and the air conditioning blasting.

How do you know?
You haven't been there in two years.

You can come to L.A. too, you know.
I mean, airplanes do fly both ways.

Not a good sign, Just.

Dude, it'd be fully bogus to get
kicked over chicks.

I hear that.

SHANE: Cows are, like...
- Ah!

SHANE:
What? What is it?

A spider.

Don't! No!

He has just as much right
to live here as you do.

"He"? That's not a he, that's an it.

All living organisms play
an important role in the ecosystem.

Do you know how
ridiculous you sound?

Don't touch that spider.

SHANE: You should really think about
taking a stress management class.

That is the sound of our college
scholarships coming from their room.

LIZZIE: You are not gonna light up
that incense in here.

[SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]

What do you mean, daring tests
of knowledge and endurance?

I thought we were competing
for a record deal.

- Haven't you ever watched the show?
- Yeah.

Isn't this the one
where we sing and dance...

...and one of us gets to be a big star?

No.

Your order, please?

I'll have the mixed green salad...

...with a side order of rice
and beans, please. Thank you.

I'll have the steak, rare.

I'll have rice and beans too.
Thank you.

Oh, are you a vegetarian?

Ever since I wrote this article
about the meat-packing industry...

- ...I haven't been able to go there.
- Oh, so you want to be a writer.

Actually, a journalist. There's so much
out there to see and write about.

- What about you?
- Earth science.

You wanna see the world,
I wanna save it.

Oh, is that all?

[DANCE MUSIC PLAYS]

And then I won my
third state championship...

...in the breaststroke,
and so it's like I...

Whoa. Okay. So I got this internship
through UCLA, right?

I mean, I like TV, but what
I really wanna do is direct films.

Yeah, I know, an L.A. boy
who wants to direct.

Can I be any more cliché?

Put bleach in your hair,
some $600 shades and you're there.

I'm good at reading people.
Let me see if I can figure you out.

- You'd be the first.
- You're senior class pres.

You never go anywhere without
your cell phone and Palm Pilot.

You volunteered for
Senator Retlett's campaign.

You figure you'll work
on Capitol Hill...

...and then run for office yourself.

Wow.

You're good.

- I saw your audition tape.
- Oh.

If I ever get my hands on the weasel
who came up with this idea...

...to put my sister and I on the
same show... It's just totally low.

- Don't you think?
- I don't know.

That's what these reality shows
are about, right?

- Conflict?
- Oh.

You work for lowlifes,
so you have to defend them.

- You're not really one of them, are you?
- No.

ANNOUNCER:
The Challenge:

Mexico.

MAX: Welcome, warriors,
to day one of The Challenge.

We like to call this event
Don't Spill the Beans.

Above you, a big bucket
of soupy, black beans.

The rules are simple.
The clean team wins the totem.

You'll have 10 seconds
to answer each question.

Let's begin. Aztecs, you get
the first question.

Who created Spider-Man?

- Stan Lee.
- That is correct.

All right.

Team Mayans, what is the unsaturated
hydroxysteroid ketone...

...that is formed
by the oxidation of steroids?

- A pregnenolone.
- That is correct.

- What?
- How did you know that?

Just because I'm a grinder doesn't mean
I have fiberglass behind my oculars.

Team Aztecs, what is the former
name of Istanbul?

- Constantinople.
- That would be correct.

Kelly, maybe next time we can
at least pretend to huddle?

What's the problem?
I got the answer.

Team Mayans, what
is the capital of Switzerland?

- Interlaken.
- It's Geneva. I swear.

- It's Interlaken.
- It's Geneva.

- It's so Interlaken.
- It's Geneva.

- Three seconds.
- You're bad at geography.

- What are you talking about?
- We need an answer.

- Interlaken.
- Geneva.

You cannot give two answers.
The answer is Bern.

Bern is the capital of Switzerland.

Sayonara, MIT.

[SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]

All right, one wrong answer here
does send the Mayans to the showers.

Are you ready?

Team Mayan, what is the world's
largest department store?

- Ladies, it's all you.
- Macy's.

- Bloomie's.
- It's Macy's.

- Bloomie's.
- Listen, it's Macy's.

- It's Bloomie's.
- Trust me.

It's Bloomie's.

[SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]

Three seconds.
Do we have an answer?

- You've gotta give an answer.
- I'm sorry, you are out of time.

The correct answer was Macy's.

A-Z-T, Aztecs!

- Gross.
- Aztecs, your totem.

Yeah!

Look on the bright side, it's vegetarian.

When I heard those girls fighting,
it was like music to my ears.

It's funny, because if they keep
on fighting, then we're gonna win.

It's a shame to even
call this a competition.

MAX: After one event, Team Aztec
leads 1 totem to none.

We like to call this event the Labyrinth.

At the center of this intricate
maze is a wooden totem.

The first team to capture
the totem is the winner.

Now, I tried it this morning.
It took me about 40 seconds.

Of course, I wasn't wearing flippers.

On your marks. Get set. Go!

KELLY:
Go. Come on. Go.

- You're going the wrong way.
- No, I'm not.

- This is not the right way.
- It is.

KELLY:
JJ, come on.

- Get off my flipper.
- It's this way. Right here.

- We've already been this way.
KELLY: Here we go. Come on.

It's a dead end.

Those veggie burgers
have clogged your brain.

Me? You get lost going from
the beach to the ocean.

Hey, obviously neither of youse
know what you're doing, so let's go.

- We're almost there.
- Where?

ANTHONY:
I don't know. Just go somewhere.

[CHEERING]

- Aztecs are the winners.
- Great.

JUSTIN:
Nice job, girls.

ANNOUNCER: Welcome back to
The Challenge: Mexico.

Today's score: Aztecs, 2.

Mayans, nothing. Zip. Zero.
Nada. El grande nada.

We get it, Max.

As you know,
at the end of each day...

...our winner receives a reward
and our losers receive punishment.

And I do believe it is time
to hand those out.

Are you ready for a party?

Yeah! Let's go!

This is the punishment?

Dude, those light blasts are awesome.

[GRUNTING]

- This just isn't natural.
- What's the matter?

Nature. It makes her nervous.

Lizzie, do you want some help?

Just because I'm a girl from the city
doesn't mean I can't pup a tent.

Okay.

[LAUGHING]

[VOICES SPEAKING
OVER TELEVISION]

What is the largest
organ of the human body?

The brain.

MAN:
Hey, Marcus.

Marcus.

Come here.

- Yeah, what's up?
- Did you find anything useful?

Any juicy things we can
use to spice up the show?

- Uh, no, no. Not really.
- Marcus...

...you're our little spy on this show.
Surely you must have found something.

Well, I was tree-sitting
to protest old-growth logging.

And I was up about 40 feet
and my head just started spinning.

Vertigo.

As long as none of the events
involve snakes, Marcus, I'm not worried.

Yeah, Shane's afraid of heights
and Lizzie's afraid of snakes.

Look, Max, I'm not really
comfortable doing this.

You wanted a career in entertainment.

And two sisters that get along,
not entertaining.

Two sisters that don't get along,
that's entertainment. Now, go get them.

[GASPING]

I hate nature!

[LAUGHING]

She hasn't opened herself up
to the world...

...and been able to see
the true beauty of nature.

I have a lot of goals for myself...

...and I don't really understand
people like my sister, Shane...

...who just kind of go around
la-di-da and...

People like that, I just don't get it.
They're always go, go, go, go, go.

And where are they going?

- I don't know, but I been told
- I don't know, but I been told

- Aztecs gonna win the gold
- Aztecs gonna win the gold

KELLY:
Okay, double-time.

I don't know, but I been told

Aztecs gonna win the gold

SHANE:
Put your left arm forward.

Stretch forward
and breathe into dancer's pose.

Hold it. Back down into lotus position.

Put your palms in front
of your heart.

- Breathe.
- Great. They've got Terminator 2.

I'm stuck with Yogi
and her two Boo Boos.

And breathe deeply.

- Staying calm.
- Guys.

- Guys, what are you doing?
- We're doing yoga.

We're focusing our energy.

It's important to be centered
for the competition.

Give me a break. We should study
our Worst Possible Situations Handbook.

What to do if your tongue
gets stuck to ice...

...or how to survive
an elephant stampede.

Oh, yeah. That's really important...

...because I saw an elephant
by the pool on a block of ice.

Yo, sibs, enough with the aggro.

Justin's right. You two
need to get over yourselves.

We're losing because you're fighting.
My whole family's watching.

Righteous light, man.
Yo, you chicks are on one gnarly path.

You gotta get banana-blasted, slip
into some chud before you see the light?

You know, me and Big A
are riding this board too.

So just...

...say some doba-dobas, you know?

Focus your board, be wack
and let's rip it up!

Justin did have a point. Although
no one could figure out what it was.

So we had to at least try
to put our issues on the shelf.

- For now.
- For the sake of the team.

- For the sake of the team?
- Right.

All right, you dudes are the b*mb.

Yo, guys. Little help here?

SHANE:
Here we go.

ANNOUNCER: Going into day two,
it's the Aztecs 2, Mayans nothing.

MAX: This afternoon's event is
entitled You Are What You Eat.

Aztecs, Mayans.

Cat food. Six worms.

Four tasty c*ck.

Snake meat.

Habañeros, 10 times
hotter than jalapeños.

Three raw eggs.

Raw liver. And, of course...

- ...the dreaded fruitcake.
- I can't do this, I'm a vegetarian.

- You should've thought of that.
- Yo, ladies. Do we need a time-out here?

No.

Now, each player will spin the wheel,
eat the food in front of them.

Your team earns a point for everything
you eat completely and keep down.

- Adam, you're first.
- Come on. Come on.

Show me the fruitcake.
Show me the fruitcake.

- Come on, come on.
MAX: Oh, buddy, it's raw eggs.

[SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY]

Let me see.

ANTHONY:
Come on.

SHANE:
Fruitcake.

MAX: Oh, I'm sorry.
That would be snake meat.

Oh!

ANTHONY: It's like chicken.
SHANE: Yeah, like chicken. Like a steak.

ANTHONY:
You got it. You got it.

JUSTIN: Come on.
ANTHONY: She's got it.

It's nothing. Nothing. Nothing.

KELLY: That is nasty.
SHANE: Keep it down.

CHARLES: Spit it out.
Spit it out. Just spit it out.

- Let's see. She's got it.
- Yeah.

JJ:
Come on, Kelly.

Oh, that'd be the habañero.

ADAM: Keep it down.
CHARLES: That's right.

- No way.
JUSTIN: Look at her.

- She's got it.
- All right!

LIZZIE: Fruitcake.
MAX: Well, the four tasty cucarachas.

JUSTIN: Come on.
LIZZIE: Almond soufflé.

ANTHONY: It's a delicacy.
- J-Man apologizes, little fellas.

SHANE: Just like granola. Crunchy.
ANTHONY: Walnuts.

[BELCHES]

All right.

- Come on, liver.
- Fruitcake, fruitcake.

MAX: Ladies and gentlemen,
it's the three raw livers.

- Come on.
JUSTIN: Dude, it's so slimy.

JJ: Yeah!
ADAM: All right.

He's hurling. He's gonna ralph.

ADAM: Right.
KELLY: Come on.

[AZTECS CHEERING]

He's got it.

- Fruitcake.
LIZZIE: Come on, fruitcake.

MAX:
Oh, it's the earthworms.

- It's vegetarian.
ANTHONY: This is nothing.

Same thing. You can definitely do this.

ADAM: No.
ANTHONY: It's innocent. It's innocent.

- All right, this is easy.
LIZZIE: She's got it.

LIZZIE: They're little.
- That's two.

JJ: She's gonna lose it.
JUSTIN: She's got it.

CHARLES: She's gonna barf.
MAX: She has to swallow it.

Open up. She did it.

LIZZIE: She's got it.
- I did it.

ANTHONY: You tied the score.
- I did it.

ADAM:
Come on.

Cat food. Bon appetito.

KELLY:
Come on, don't screw this up. Come on.

CHARLES: You got it, girl.
- Mm.

What? It tastes just like tuna.

That was weird.

Anthony, the game is tied.

If you succeed,
we go into sudden death.

But if you fail,
the Aztecs are the winners.

- Fruitcake, fruitcake.
- Fruitcake.

- Fruitcake!
- Yeah!

JUSTIN: It's in the bag.
KELLY: That's not fair.

MAX:
Just like Mom's, huh?

That's it, lap it up.

LIZZIE:
One bite at a time.

He's okay.

MAX: Oh, I think he's hurting.
- Is he gonna barf?

- Oh, no. What's the matter, dude?
- Christmas, '96. It's a long story.

JUSTIN:
Hold it down, dude.

Well, that's it.
Aztecs, you're the winners.

I'm sorry, guys.

- Aztecs.
- Yeah!

- Yeah!
- All right.

It's all right.

Barfing. Always good for ratings.

ANNOUNCER: And the Aztecs
continue to blaze ahead...

...dominating the Mayans


Warriors, this morning's event
we like to call Animal Farm.

Each team is responsible
for getting their animals...

...out of their pen
into that central pen.

The first team to get their animals
across the line wins a totem.

On your marks, get set and go!

All right, all right!

- Let's go.
- All right, hustle.

Okay.

Come on, piggy. Come on, piggy.

I got him.

How are you feeling?
Are you okay?

Okay, good. Let's go.

Hi, little goat-goat. You're so nice.

Om.

I got a pig.

Om.

I know what I'm doing.

I took a class in Santa Fe
on animal communication.

This is a nice little goat.

Let's go.

That was the last one.

- Congratulations, Mayans.
- All right.

- All right.
- Right on.

SHANE: Still in the game.
JUSTIN: Yes, we are.

Right on, right on.

Yeah, there are weak links on this team,
and we know who it is.

Everybody but me.

Kelly has an
anger management problem.

Look, I know I come on
pretty strong at times.

She can't be on a team.

Thinks she's a leader,
she's only louder.

Nobody told me I was gonna be
carrying a goat and a pig.

MAX:
At the end of day two...

...the Aztecs maintain their lead
at 3 totems to 1.

Therefore, today's reward
goes to Team Aztec.

They will be treated to a steak
and lobster dinner.

- Cheers.
- Cheers to you.

MAX:
Now, today's losers, Team Mayan...

... well, they can only eat what they
can catch with their bare hands.

Good luck, guys.

Hey, guys, lobster or steak? Pick one.

Why don't you try chanting
to figure it out?

Come on, don't you think
that's a little fourth-grade...

...even for you, Kelly?

- Whose team are you on, anyway?
- Yours, unfortunately.

CHARLES:
That was low.

I don't know who this Adam guy
thinks he is, but I don't trust him.

There's something fishy going on here
and I'm gonna get to the bottom of it.

I got something. I got something.
Come on, dinner.

SHANE: There has got to be
a better way than this.

- Oh! I'm so sorry.
- No, I'm sorry.

- Hi.
- Hey. How are you?

I didn't see you.
I think I'm blind from hunger.

- I'm sorry.
- It's okay. It's not your fault.

I wish I could help.

Maybe you can.

Toss me your burger.

- What?
- Toss me your burger.

- But you're not allowed to have it.
- Trust me.

- What did I just do?
- You caught a hamburger.

I did what?

You caught a hamburger
with your bare hands.

Right.

Is this a burger? Gross.

I don't understand.

This is how we East Coast girls
catch our food with our bare hands.

Right on!

Justin, go deep.

Whoo!

Thanks, guys.

And for dessert, coconut juice.

- Give it up for teamwork, Mayans.
- All right.

- Cheers.
- Cheers.

Can't deny it. I mean, what Lizzie
did with catching our food was clever.

I have to admit. The way Shane
wrangled that goat today...

I mean, it was amazing.

- Weird, but amazing.
- Weird.

But clever. But it's still not gonna
change anything between us.

- It's not.
- Let's face it...

...we're here to win scholarships,
not put our relationship back together.

Operator? Por favor, necesito...

...um, voicemail?

Comprende voicemail?

I'm trying to check my messages?

Hello?

Hello?

- Hey.
- Hi.

- Thanks for helping me out today.
- Oh, no. Thank yourself.

It was your idea.

- What you doing with that camera?
- Not much.

Just fooling around,
a little behind the scenes.

The challenge behind
The Challenge.

That's cool.

Come on, Big A. Bouncing my man.

Sorry, dude.

- Gin.
- Gosh!

Okay, what about best of 81?

- You're on.
- Okay.

[SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]

I'm gonna go get some fresh air.

I'm gonna go take a walk.

Sash. Look at this.

You see that?

They went outside. So?

There's chemistry there. I can feel it.
That is potential disqualification.

Disqualifications equal ratings.

Remember that thing in 2000?
It was a four-point bump.

- Max, I don't know.
- Big Joe, get your camera.

I'll be right back.

Come on.

Are we breaking any rules out here?

I just happen to be taking a walk.

- Well, we were walking in the...
- Same direction.

- So can I ask you a question?
- Sure.

How did you and your sister
end up living apart?

Well, we all used
to live together in D.C.

Before my parents split.

They split when we were 12.

Yeah. My parents split when I was 10.

I know the drill.

Two years ago my mom
got a job opportunity in L.A.

Her dream job,
and she just couldn't turn it down.

And I just jumped at the chance
to go with her.

Because I never really fit in
in Washington.

It's so intense.

It's not the vibe I want in my life.

Anyway, Lizzie never
really forgave me...

...for leaving.

The irony is, my parents,
they get along great.

And they would do anything
to bring Lizzie and I back together.

- How can you stand to work for Max?
- I can't.

But I gotta pay for college.

Guess we're both here
for the same reasons.

Yeah.

So...

...we have to do all these
interviews for the show.

Now it's your turn.

So, Marcus, what kind
of films are you gonna make?

Are you the dark and brooding filmmaker
like Tarantino?

No, no.

I'm more of a "make you laugh
and cry in 90 minutes" kind of guy.

The power to take someone to a whole
other time and place is amazing.

Did you ever see that movie
with Gwyneth Paltrow...?

Shakespeare in Love. Yeah.
It's one of my all-time top five favorites.

Me too.

What are your other four?

Let's see.

Casablanca, Titanic, Gone With the Wind
and When Harry Met Sally.

Guess you like a good love story.

I guess so.

My brother and I, we helped each other
get through my parents' divorce.

I don't know what I'd do without him.

That's pretty amazing.

I think you're pretty amazing.

Pretty and amazing.

I'm gonna pretend
you didn't just say that.

Because if you did just say that...

...I might have to tell you
how amazing I think you are.

Which I do.

And if I told you that...

...we might move a little closer.

You mean...

- ...like this?
- Yeah.

I can't believe it. Shane?

- What do you think you're doing?
- What are you doing?

The rules are very clear.
No romantic entanglements.

Speaking of entangled.

Look, there's absolutely
nothing going on here.

Hey, guys, I hate to ruin the moment,
but we're about to get busted by Max.

If he catches us, he's gonna disqualify
us all. Come on. Let's get out of here.

Come on. Move your butt.
We've gotta get them on tape.

How could we have missed them?

This way.

- This is too dangerous.
- We almost got busted.

We better get back.

- See you tomorrow?
- Yeah.

See you at the bungalow.

Night.

Wait, wait.

- Bye.
- Bye.

KELLY:
One. Two. Three. Four.

One.

Two.

Three.

Four.

SHANE:
Om.

[SPEAKING SANSKRIT]

ANNOUNCER:
The Challenge: Mexico.

This event is called
Survival of the Fittest.

Each team will be dropped somewhere
out here in the hot Mexican desert...

... 10 miles away from the bungalow.
The first team back wins the totem.

Each player is allowed to bring
just one survival item.

Oh, and I almost forgot:

Each player must also carry 14 pounds
of college textbooks in their backpack.

This afternoon, it's fairly cool.

A hundred and two degrees
in the blazing sun.

For centuries, brave men
have battled this harsh wasteland.

Some of them returned alive.

Others were not so lucky.

[SPEAKING INDISTINCLY]

KELLY:
All right, troops. Let's take a break.

It's time for a supply check.

- Okay, water.
- Check.

- Nutrition bar?
- Check.

- Okay, sunscreen.
- Check.

All right. I got the map.

And according to my calculations...

...we should be at base camp
at about 1400 hours.

All right, troops. Let's move out.

So there I was, scorpions on my left,
mountains on my right.

And we were out of water.
And it was hot.

All I could think about was food.

And it was the same thing.
I kept seeing this enormous meatball.

And all I wanted to do was eat.

Let me get this straight.

We're out of water.

- Check.
- We're out of sunscreen.

- Check.
- We're out of nutrition bars.

Check.

But, we still have our map?

Check.

Well, according to our
Worst Possible Situations Handbook...

...we can eat cactus hearts
and ants and survive fine.

Do you know how many ants I would
have to eat not to feel hungry right now?

Dudes, we're noggled.

He's right. We can't go on like this.

[HELICOPTER FLYING
OVERHEAD]

If we had a helicopter,
we'd be back in, like, five minutes.

JUSTIN:
That thing goes by every 20 minutes.

What are you doing?

LIZZIE:
I know it's in here.

Lizzie, do you really think
this is the time to worry about shine?

LIZZIE:
Who has my handbook?

- What's up?
- Rip me out a page.

It is hot enough out here.
What are you doing?

[HELICOPTER PILOT
SPEAKING OVER RADIO]

Sí, 10-4, Base. This is Unit 1
investigating possible brush fire, over.

Hey! Hey, right here!
Right here!

Hey, hey, hey!

PILOT: Roger, Base, this appears
to be a rescue situation. 10-4.

[COUGHING]

- We made it. We made it.
- Come on.

- We're here?
- We made it.

We made it. We did it.
We did it, you guys.

- We did it.
- We're here?

[GASPING]

We're here.

No. No!

- No.
- Hey, guys.

- Hey, Aztecs.
- What took so long?

Dudes, where you been?

Hey, have you seen my friend
Mr. Totem over here?

[GROANING]

CHARLES: No.
KELLY: No.

- Mayans.
- Mayans.

MARCUS:
Hey, Lizzie, Shane.

Nicely done. I'm impressed.

Thanks.

Uh, well, again, congratulations.

Shimmering plum?

It's a good color for you.

- For us.
- Right.

You know, this is a really,
really bad idea.

I know.

Let's go.

CHARLES: I thought it was clever.
KELLY: Charles, clever?

You know we're...

JJ: Has anyone seen the sunscreen?
KELLY: Where is Adam, anyway?

- Hey.
- Hi.

- Hey.
- Hi.

So, what's up?

MARCUS: Well, working for the show
does have its advantages.

This change of scenery,
getting out of D.C.

- I feel like I can breathe.
- I know.

We type A's gotta remember
to kick it from time to time.

Stop and smell the coffee grounds.

But you never do, do you?

Me neither.

- It's Max. He found us.
ADAM: Let's fly. He's coming fast.

Wait.

There. There they are!

LIZZIE:
I don't see him.

Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!

[CRASHING]

[COUGHING]

How in the world
do they keep finding us?

This is too dangerous.
Us together.

If we wanna keep seeing each other,
we just have to be unromantic.

All right. I guess we guys will take
that one. You girls take that one.

Bye.

Marcus, what exactly happened
back there?

You were supposed to set it up
to capture...

...Adam and Shane's romantic
entanglement on camera.

Now take a look at Big Joe.

It'll take him a month
to get that sand out.

Do you want this job or not?

You crossed the line. Those girls don't
deserve what you've done to them.

Well, you see, "What we've done
to them," is what you mean.

No. I'm not doing it anymore.
You can do your own dirty work.

Fine. You're fired.

Max, we don't have any other interns,
and I don't think...

...we're going to find any
by tomorrow here in Mexico.

Fine. Then I'm demoting you.

You're demoting me
from head intern?

Yes. To sub-intern.

Fine. If I didn't need this money,
I'd have been out of here a week ago.

- Max.
- Yeah?

Can I talk to you for a second?

ANNOUNCER:
The Challenge: Mexico.

MAX: Welcome, warriors,
to Campfire Council.

Kudos to the Mayans for their clever
solution to Survival of the Fittest.

You now just trail 3 totems to 2.

Now, without giving too much away,
I will tell you that tomorrow's event...

...has a lot to do with balance.

Shane can out-balance anyone.

Now, it has come to my attention that
there has been a serious infraction...

...in the rules of The Challenge.

We have uncovered evidence
that two of our warriors...

...have been involved
in a romantic relationship...

...violating one of our core rules.

Those warriors...

...are Shane...

...and Adam.

- What?
- Therefore, Shane and Adam...

...are hereby disqualified
from tomorrow's event.

This is totally beat.

I'm really sorry, guys.

Don't worry, guys. It's not over yet.

- Did you do this?
- I don't know what you're talking about.

I just want you to know
I took karate for 10 years.

I would've taken us home on this one.

I'm sorry.

It's my bad.

I can't believe it.

It's usually you who gets in trouble.

- Me?
- Remember that time...

...when you snuck out
in the middle of the night...

...to tie yourself to a tree
that was gonna be cut down in the park?

- Mom was so mad.
- I know.

She made Dad call the police.

- But the tree's still there, isn't it?
- Yes, it is.

I have to give you that.
That one really almost did Mom in.

How is Mom?

She's good.

Really good, actually.

She's thinking of running
for city council.

But she really misses you.

Yeah, and Dad...

...he always asks about you.

But you never get on the phone
when he calls.

He really misses you too.

We should really get some sleep.

As we begin today's round,
the Aztecs lead by just one totem.

Now, if the Mayans lose this event, the
Aztecs will be winners of The Challenge.

[PANPIPE PLAYS]

Where is that music
coming from, anyway?

This event is the true test
of mental endurance.

A test of balance.

A test of strength.

It's called Max Says,
and it's quite simple.

Like Simon Says, you must follow
my simple directions.

Last player standing
wins for their team.

There's just one catch.

All right, Challenge warriors.

Are you all in position?
Now, let's begin.

You guys can do without me.
I know you can.

MAX:
All right, now.

Max says,
turn all the way around.

Stay focused, guys.

Max says, jump in place.

SHANE: You can do it. All right.
ADAM: Good job.

Come on, Aztecs.

Max says,
put your left foot forward.

SHANE:
Go, J-Man.

- All right, Lizzie. Good job.
MAX: Very good.

Now pat your head
with your right hand.

Ah-ha! I got you.
I didn't say, "Max says."

All right. Max says,
one-foot jumping jacks.

Very good.

All right.
Max says, stand there.

Arms by your sides.

Just stand there
and don't do anything.

Just stand there.

You've been up here
for 40 minutes.

This has been tough.

Come on, Charles, focus. Just think
about it. You can do it. Focus. Come on.

I think I can.

I think I can. I think I can.
I think I can...

I think I can't.

Oh, Charles, you are out of there.

SHANE:
You're doing great, J-Man.

He rides a fakie-fakie.
He pulls an awesome ollie jump.

[YELLS]

Whoo!

Justin, you're done, baby.

- That's okay, Justin. Good job.
- Hang in there.

- It's okay, dude. I got it.
- Let's go. Come on. Hold on there, JJ.

[SINGING IN SPANISH]

JJ, bring yourself out.

Come on, Anthony, Lizzie.
Concentrate.

- Come on, A-Man.
- You can do it.

SHANE: Let's go, Anthony. You can
do it. Stay focused. Concentrate.

WOMAN:
Antonio. Bambino.

Ma?

Have some more lasagna.

Ma.

Mama.

- Is that you?
- You always like Mama's lasagna.

Ma.

- It's okay, guys.
CHARLES: You can do it.

JUSTIN: It's okay.
MAX: Okay, that's it. There's only two.

- There's only two left.
JJ: Girl, that's right!

CHARLES: Come on. Keep it going.
ADAM: Kelly, you can do this.

Max says, hold your right foot
with your right hand.

CHARLES:
Come on.

ADAM: Come on, Kelly.
It's up to you.

- Get us this point, it's all we need.
CHARLES: Just focus. Come on.

You can do it. You're fine.
Just concentrate.

Do your Ujjayi breathing.

Careful. Breathe.

Breathe.

That's dancer's pose.
That's a yoga pose!

ANTHONY:
You try that, Kelly.

SHANE: All right, Lizzie!
CHARLES: Just focus.

ADAM:
Come on.

- No.
JUSTIN: Yeah!

Kelly falls. That means
Mayans, you are the winner.

Yeah!

- Good try, Kelly.
- Good try. It's all right.

MAX:
And that's it. It is all tied up.

That means the winner
of tomorrow's match...

...will be the winner
of The Challenge.

I used to think the whole
yoga, inner chi thing...

...was just a bunch of nonsense.

But I don't know,
I wasn't gonna let Kelly beat me.

So I did it for the team. The Mayans.

Look, I did what I had to do.
I don't regret taking those pictures.

The only thing I regret is getting stuck
on a team with a bunch of losers.

MAX: Once again it is time
for reward and punishment.

The Mayans get to go
on a beautiful sunset cruise.

The Aztecs get to go too.

But with a whole new wardrobe.

Dude, this is the life.

- Stellar, yo.
- Stellar, yo.

- Stellar, yo.
- Stellar, yo.

- It's your fault we're in these outfits.
- My fault?

- Yes, your fault.
- No. You fell off first.

Okay, you think I wanna serve people?

- I don't wanna do this.
- Do you see what I look like? A banana.

I look stupid in this dress.

"We want fresh guacamole."
I hate guacamole.

- Mayans, let's hit the water.
- Sweet.

Geronimo!

Geronimo!

Come on.

Waiter? Oh, waiter.

You rang?

Well, I would just love
another Diet Coke.

And I just wanted to tell you
that I missed you.

ANTHONY: Come on, Shane.
Come on, Shane, jump.

- Yeah, Shane.
JUSTIN: Come on.

[YELLING]

ANTHONY:
All right.

JUSTIN:
Surf's up, dude.

What are you
so smiley-happy about?

Oh, I was just thinking about how much
I've enjoyed our time together.

Are you making fun of me?

It's called joking, Kelly.
Lighten up.

Come on in, Lizzie.
The water's great.

Come on.

Come on.

- Lizzie, hey, listen...
- Marcus, can you believe this?

We could actually win this thing.

- Georgetown, here I come.
- That's great, that's great.

Can I talk to you for a minute?

Marcus, what's wrong?

Look. I gotta be honest
about something.

It was my idea to put
the two of you on the show.

What?

Two twins who can't stand each other?
I thought it'd be a good hook.

- A hook?
- It'd be an innocent ratings grabber.

- I don't believe this.
- Look. I know it's not an excuse, okay?

But I needed this money
to pay for my college tuition.

And, believe me,
I completely understand...

...if you never wanna speak to me again.

I just had to tell you the truth.

- Such an idiot.
- No, you're not.

You're wonderful.

And I'm crazy about you.

Why are you telling me this now?

Because I couldn't stand
being dishonest with you.

Because Max will do anything
for ratings, and tomorrow's race...

...I know he's gonna try
to mess with you guys again.

I'd thank you, Marcus,
but it's a little late for honesty.

I'm not so sure
how I feel about you right now.

ANTHONY: Come on, Lizzie.
JUSTIN: Come on in, Lizzie.

Wish you were in here, huh?

I just can't believe it.

I'm really sorry he turned out
to be such a weasel, Lizzie.

Whatever. This trip was supposed to be
about winning a college scholarship...

...not falling in love.

Right.

And no matter what happens tomorrow,
or even after tomorrow...

...and no matter what Max
throws our way...

...we'll always have each other.

We do, don't we?

Being on The Challenge
with my sister...

...showed me what I missed
the past four years.

We were always concentrating
on how different we were.

But, really, we have a lot
in common.

I don't know. I'm really happy that I now
have her in my life and...

And I can't believe we wasted
four years of our lives.

I'm really happy. Really happy.

MAX: Heading into the homestretch,
it's all tied up.

The Aztecs and Mayans,
three totems apiece.

It's gonna be an exciting finish.

Today is the final day
of competition.

Today's victors
will win the scholarships.

It's been a long week.
A tough week.

And it all comes down to this.
This moment.

This event. The Warrior Relay.

This event requires our players...

...to demonstrate the skills
of a great warrior.

Speed, bravery, cunning, intellect.

Look for maps along the way
to guide you.

Now, if at any portion
of this event you fall...

...you must go back
and begin that portion again.

There's a lot riding on this one.
So go forth, my Challenge warriors.

May the best team win.

On your mark.

Get set.

Go!

MAX: Our Challenge warriors have
to make it across these pontoons.

On the other side will be a map
that will direct them to phase two.

Anthony, you must go back.
You gotta go back.

Come on, you guys.
Come on, come on.

Come on. Let's go.

Come on, Lizzie. Come on, Lizzie.

Come on, come on!

Charles, come on!

Come on, Charles, come on!

Come on, Shane.

- Shane!
- Come on, Shane!

- All right!
- Let's go!

- Come on!
- Go!

- Go, JJ.
- Come on, JJ!

- Come on, Justin. Come on.
- Come on, Justin!

- Come on. Let's go.
- Go, JJ.

Mayans, get your map
out of the totem.

- Come on.
- Okay.

- JJ, come on!
- Come on, JJ! Yeah!

- The beach. The beach!
- The beach.

Come on, JJ!

Aztecs, get your map
out of the totem.

Phase two. Our Challenge warriors
must use their WaveRunners...

...to capture all four flags
from their team's buoy.

Attached to each flag
will be a clue...

...that will lead them
to phase three.

[SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY]

LIZZIE:
Go Mayans!

Dude, this is some kind of map.

This goes here.

- Arrows.
- That fits right there.

- There's a bridge.
- That's in the rocks over there.

LIZZIE:
There's the bridge. Come on, guys.

MAX:
Phase three.

Our warriors must now face
their most dangerous challenge yet.

They must traverse this bridge...

...spanning this treacherous gorge.

No big deal. I'll go first.

Come on. Go, go.

Go. Take off your anchor.

ANTHONY:
All right, Lizzie, go for it!

All right, Lizzie.
You got the lead.

Come on, girl. You got it.

Whoa!

ANTHONY: That's it.
Just with your knees. Just like that.

SHANE: You're doing it.
JUSTIN: Get up there!

ANTHONY:
Hold on. Hold on.

JUSTIN:
Lizzie!

Get ready. She's almost finished.

All right, come on, Lizzie. That's it.

Come on, Anthony, you can do it.

All right, A-Man.

- Come on, Anthony.
SHANE: All right. Find your balance.

JUSTIN:
Looking good, A-Man. Looking good.

- Yeah, come on!
- All right!

Okay, okay, okay.

- Yeah!
- All right, Anthony.

- Go, go, go.
- No, go ahead.

- No, go.
- No, you go first.

MAN:
Hold on, hold on.

- You're good.
ANTHONY: You got it, J-Man.

- Come on, Justin. You can do it.
- Come on, Justin.

- All right, here we go.
- Come on, Justin.

- Come on, Justin.
- Okay. Okay, here we go.

Dudes, that was awesome.

- Come on, Shane, you can do it.
- You got it, Shane. You got it.

Come on, Shane.

I can't do this!

- Oh, no. She's afraid of heights.
- Thrashed.

LIZZIE: You can do it. You know it.
- No, I can't.

You got it, Shane. You got it.

LIZZIE:
Our future's in your hands.

MAN:
Okay, you're set.

ANTHONY: Come on, Shane.
Nice and easy. You got this.

Come on, Shane. You can do it.

JUSTIN:
No, don't stop. Keep coming.

ANTHONY: Just concentrate, Shane.
JUSTIN: You got it!

ANTHONY: Come on, Shane.
- I can't do this!

Hurry, Shane. They're gaining on us.

- I can't do it!
- You have to. Our future's in your hands.

No, I can't.

We can't go on without her.
She has to get across.

Don't worry, guys. I'll get her across.

Don't worry, Shane. You can't fall.
You're harnessed to the bridge.

ANTHONY:
Lizzie, get her over.

Shane. You can do it.
Just don't look down.

[SCREAMING]

Shane!

JUSTIN:
Come on, Shane.

You okay?

ANTHONY:
Come on, Shane. Come on.

Shane. Do your Fuji breathing.

- Ujjayi breathing.
- Whatever it's called, just do it.

You can do it.

You can do it.

Okay. Okay.

You got it.

You got it, Shane. Come on, Shane.

I did it! I did it! I did it! I won!

- Dudes, we gotta go.
- Okay.

Come on, push. Push. Come on.

KELLY:
You can do it. Focus.

- Map says we gotta go that way.
- Back to the beach.

KELLY:
Come on, Charles, you can do it.

Push. Come on.

Get ready to go, girl.
We don't got no time.

MAX: Phase four. The final rung
on the ladder to victory.

SHANE:
Look, the last totem.

MAX: All they have to do
is get to the totem.

But there is still one hurdle
our warriors must overcome.

LIZZIE:
Snakes?

- Okay. Okay.
- Okay.

You got it, JJ. Push. Come on. Go.

Okay. Justin, Anthony.

- Justin, go. Go. Go.
- Go. Go, guys.

Go. Go. Go.

Down, boy.

Come on. All right.

Good job, guys. Okay, Lizzie, go.

Snakes.

Snakes. Snakes.

Let's go. Come on.

Oh, my gosh.

- Lizzie's afraid of snakes.
- Man. Thrashed again.

Heights and snakes. Our worst fears.

Marcus warned me about this.
It's all Max's doing.

We can't get that totem
unless Lizzie crosses the snake pit.

Okay. You guys go ahead.
I'll get her across.

- Okay, go! Go.
- All right. Hurry up. Hurry up.

Lizzie, we are so close.
That totem is right there.

This is all Max messing
with our heads.

- We can't let him win.
- But...

- But they're snakes!
- Constrictors and water snakes.

They're not poisonous. I read it in
the Worst Possible Situations Handbook.

- You read the book?
- Yes, I read the book. Of course I did.

I mean, it was important to you.

Here they come. Hurry up.

So just do what I do, okay?

Slow. And one step at a time.

[SCREAMING]

Go. Go. Come on.

- Move it. Come on, you guys. Let's go.
KELLY: Be careful.

ADAM: Come on, JJ.
KELLY: Here we go.

Let's go. Let's go.

ADAM:
Hurry, they're on the ladder. Come on.

Yeah! Yeah. Yeah.

Yes. Yes!

- The Mayans are the winners.
- Yeah!

- Yes, we did it!
- We did it!

This has been the most
exciting Challenge ever.

We'll be back with a preview
of Challenge: Brazil right after this.

So I'll see you in L.A. for Christmas?

That's after I see you in D.C.
for Thanksgiving.

Congratulations, Lizzie.
You deserve this.

Thanks.

- What's this?
- The letter I wrote Max this morning.

I quit the show.

What?

- How are you gonna pay for college?
- Not this way.

I'll figure something out.

Marcus, I've decided
how I feel about you.

- Hey.
- Congratulations.

I'm so sorry you didn't
get your scholarship.

Don't worry. I'm probably
gonna get a baseball scholarship.

What? To where?

Stanford. We'll just be an hour apart.

Okay, bro.

Yo, dude. Ring me up a shippie.

Yeah. You stay in touch too, brother.

[SCREAMING]

Oh, my gosh. Check this out!
Oh, my gosh. I can't believe it.

You guys, you guys, you guys.

- What?
- Check this out.

I just got this fax.
The network saw our footage...

...and they've invited me to be on
the next American Star Maker.

JJ's in the house.

Hey, guys. Guys.

Kelly has something
she'd like to say to you all.

- Congratulations.
- Speak up, Kelly. They can't hear you.

I said, congratulations.

Sometimes I'm overly competitive.
It's something I'm trying to work on.

No hard feelings.
You're a great competitor.

And if you guys are ever
in Tennessee, give me a holler...

...because I know a place where
we can get a great cappuccino.

Deal.

ADAM: Yeah, all right, Kelly.
JJ: All right, Kelly.

Good job, Kelly.

Can I borrow your camera?

Sure.

Hi, Max.

- Hi, can we talk, Max?
- Sure.

You're such a big star.

Could we get your picture
for our friends back home?

Of course. Absolutely.
It'd be my pleasure.

Okay, just right over there?

Yep. Keep going.

How's this?

Okay. Now, a little bit to your left.

- Okay. This?
- Yeah, that's good.

Maybe back a little bit.

- One step back.
- All right.

Listen, no hard feelings.
This was all just good television.

Oh, not at all. I mean,
we understand completely.

We don't hold a grudge.
We just get even.

Say "beans."

Beans.

MARCUS: Yeah!
ADAM: All right!

- That's what I call good TV.
- Big ratings.

I know.

Shane, I don't know
how to tell you this, except...

Um...

- You know what I mean.
- I think so.

You know,
I know this sounds crazy, but...

...you were my first love.

Wow.

You're the first guy
who's ever said that to me.

Hello. Remember me?

- Ben?
- Ben?

Ashley, I was the first
to fall in love with you.

In the Bahamas.
Remember Holiday in the Sun?

Mary-Kate, I've been in love
with you since Getting There.

I spent the whole movie
trying to win you over.

Forget it, guys. Ashley.

Does "We'll always have Passport
to Paris" mean anything to you?

Brocker, we were 13.
It's just puppy love.

After all, it was Paris.

You know what, guys?
I hate to break up this party...

- Billy?
- Yeah. Don't sound so surprised.

I was Ashley's guy in Getting There
and Mary-Kate's in Holiday in the Sun.

But technically, neither of us were
too crazy about you in either movie.

Okay. Well, what about my
guest spot on So Little Time?

- Mary-Kate, you liked me.
- I was a regular.

So if we're counting
the TV series, then I...

Okay. This is getting
a little out of control.

Mary-Kate, you liked me on...

Guys.

[SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]

You were only our movie boyfriends.

Never mind.

If there was ever a perfect time
for a getaway.

MARY-KATE: You know, Ash,
boys will come and go.

But we'll always have each other.

ASHLEY:
And that's not just in the movies.

[UB40'S "I GOT YOU BABE" PLAYS]

[MUTED SPEECH]

MAN:
Stay on. Stay on. Stay on.

- I'm being dragged!
MAN: Luther, you're dragging too hard.

If you could hurry, por favor.
I'm a half-hour late.

- Last time I was late...
MAN: Just take it from there.

If you could hurry, por...

I think I had too many
cappuccinos at the layover...

MAN:
One more time.

Why do you get the window
near the bed?

Why do you get the window
near the bed?

Because I need the air...

"Habañeños... " What...?

What are those things called?

Did I tell you my mom makes...?

As...

As long as none of the invents...

MAN: "As long as none of the events."
- Okay.

As long as none of the invents...

Okay, I got this.

If we don't get out of here,
he'll disqualify us all.

Sorry.

Now place your palms "flacing... "

Now place your palms...

MAN:
"Place your palms... "

I hit myself.

I just got this fax.
And the network saw all our footage...

MAN:
Cut!

The network saw all of our footage
and they invited me to...

Marcus.

What kind of movies are you gonna...?

What's my line?

And they've invited me
to be the next Star Maker.

- See you at the bungalow?
- Yeah.

Wait.

Marker.

MAN:
One, two, three, down.

Marker.

MAN:
Good. Go.

- I'm ready to go, guys.
MAN: Cut.

MAN 1: Waver.
MAN 2: Waver. Good.

They really want us to do it
because I look like Cousin Itt right now.

Two of our warriors have been
involved in a romantic relationship.

Those warriors are Shane and Lizzie.

MAN:
Let's cut.

- I'm really sorry. Sorry.
MAN: That's all right. Take that line.

So I'll see you in New York for L.A.?

Max says...

What does Max say?

They're not poisonous.
I read that in the book.

In the... In the Worst Possible
Handbook Situations.

We're here at the Fiestamericana
Hotel in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico...

...where we will meet the...
Our eight challengers...

- Now take a couple step backs. Sorry.
MAN: One more time.

Guys? Okay, you're...

- Ben.
MAN: Take it from there. "Guys, guys."

Look on the bright side.
It's vegetarian.

MAN:
One more time, one more time.

Oh, my God.

- I can't see.
MAN: One more time.