02x02 - Play Nice

[bunniefuu]

[bouncy piano music]

- [Dean] Dad, you

take your pills?

- [Dean's father] Yes.

[BB pellets sh**ting]

- [Dean] With food?

- [Dean's father] Yes.

[BB pellets sh**ting]

- Oh, dad what are you doing?

Dad, BB g*n?

Give me that please, thank you.

God, I thought I threw that out.

- Yeah, the kid from 11 is

trying to steal my roses.

- No, she's just

tying her shoelaces.

- Yeah cause she

saw us watching.

Conniving little b*tch.

- Hey, she's eight.

- Yeah, well so's

that Thumberg girl.

She's trying to

take over the world.

Here she's trying to ban meat,

and half the sausages

in the supermarket

are made of peas these days.

Madness.

- Um,

so, Dad,

the Rib Theater is

putting on Sweeney Todd.

I was thinking that

I might audition.

I guess it would only be

a couple nights a week.

- And who is going

to make my dinner?

- Well, I was thinking

that I could, uh

make a few meals on Sunday

and then put them in the fridge

for you to heat up later.

It's really easy.

- I'm not using the microwave.

You can do your weeny dog

thing some other time.

Don't forget my knees.

[joyful piano music]

- Is that where you want it?

- [Dean] Mm, down a

on the left I think?

- [Ellie] Uh, no,

up on the right.

Perfect.

- Oh, they are so special.

- You look very

glam today, Shares.

- I was just at the mall

getting a few bits and bobs

and I decided to

get my makeup done.

- Aw.

- You look beautiful, Shares.

- Stop it.

Should we hold hands?

Take a minute for Hemi.

- Yeah.

- Do you wanna say something?

- Yes.

Um,

Koro, we

miss you.

- Hm.

- We love you.

We

hope to make you proud

by taking Loving Tributes

to the next level.

- Aw.

Yeah, Beau?

- Oh no no, I haven't

prepared anything.

- It's alright.

Yeah.

- Okay.

- I mean I could,

I guess I could freestyle.

Yo, Hemi

That's pretty hard

to rhyme, man.

[clears throat]

Hemi

[rapping] We miss you, man.

and we wish you weren't dead,

but you lost the battle

to the tumor in your head.

Thanks for the job

and the mean advice.

I love cheese toasters

and chicken fried rice.

Loving Tributes Funeral Home.

Drive your car carefully

in a school zone.

Casket, casket,

human in a basket

Got the f-

- Alright thank you, Beau.

Thank you.

- No I shouldn't.

- Hmm?

- No, I shouldn't.

- Shouldn't what?

- I shouldn't sing.

- Oh.

- No, no, it's not about me,

it's about Hemi.

- Okay, that was nice.

Back to it.

- Oh.

Casket casket human in a basket.

[Beau laughs]

[Dean humming Amazing Grace]

- [singing] Zing grace

How sweet

the sound.

[electronic ballad]

♪ Beginning of the end ♪

♪ Just asking for a friend ♪

♪ So let's just call it square ♪

- Pancakes.

What the f*ck's a sieve?

What is this?

So fancy.

Oh yeah, it's, it's.

[stammering]

♪ Just maybe ♪

[phone notification]

[tapping floor]

- [Bop It!] High score, 22!

- Piece of piss.

- [Bop It!] Bop it!

[Bop It music begins]

Twist it!

Pull it!

Twist it!

Pull it!

- Oo!

- [Bop It!] Bop it!

Twist it!

[gasps]

Bop it!

Pull it!

Yeah!

- Ugh!

- [Bop It!] Remember my

first time playing Bop It.

Bop it to start!

- No, I don't want to.

- [Bop It!] I'm going to sleep!

- Okay.

[typing]

[joyful piano music]

Gotcha.

- [Ellie] Hello.

- [Ollie] Hi, sorry,

we were early.

- Oh, has Sharyn offered

you drinks already?

- Yes, I ordered a

tea a long time ago.

- Sorry, she's-

- Don't be,

it's been like two minutes.

- Not by my watch.

- Well, I'd hate to argue

with the genuine Galvin Kline.

- I'm Ollie.

And this is my partner Manu

and my sister-in-law Moira.

- Brent's wife.

- I've got the fancy thickies.

- Thank you.

- Careful, love, it's very hot.

- Oh, sh*t, that's

hot.

- She just told

you how hot it was.

- So so sorry.

- Have you had a chance to

take a look at our offerings?

- Here at Loving Tributes

we do our very best

to honor any request.

- Yeah, honoring your

loved one is our priority.

- Oh.

Uh, Sharyn is there

anything else?

- [Sharyn] [faintly]

Oh, I, oh, does my?

Oh.

Yeah, I'll just leave you to it.

- [Dean] Thank you.

- Oliver, oh, I'm sorry,

I'm struggling to speak

because my tongue is so burnt.

Oliver and I have agreed

to split the costs.

Brent deserves the best,

so I'm thinking we'll

do the deluxe package.

- So that's the

Rosewood gloss casket.

- Beautiful choice.

- [Manu] That's $4,000.

- And?

- And that seems like a

lot of money for something

that's gonna rot.

- Manu.

- Sorry, I don't

mean to be crass,

but what about the pine?

It's eco-friendly.

- It's tacky.

- We can make the Rosewood work.

- In terms of flowers,

the deluxe package

includes the casket spray,

the sympathy bowl,

uh wreath.

- Not to forget the

six bouquets.

- Yes, thank you, Dean,

I was just about to say that.

- $1,600, we can't afford that.

- [Ollie] Babe.

- What was that, Manu?

- Sorry. I hate to be that guy,

but that feels

like a lot of money

for something that's

also gonna die.

- It's okay.

- Ollie, it's our

honeymoon money.

- Oh, I'm sorry that

my husband's death

is such an inconvenience to you.

- He's not saying that.

- I am saying that.

- It's just

a bit of a stretch.

- We do have payment

plans available.

- Stop being so difficult,

he's your brother.

- Well, we all know Brent

wouldn't have done

the same for Ollie.

- How

dare you?

- Babe, don't go there.

- What?

He was an as*h*le.

We all know he was an as*h*le.

He was an as*h*le.

- Shut your f*cking mouth!

- [Dean] Oh, oh.

[gasps and groans dramatically]

- I'm not doing this.

- Oh.

Oh my gosh.

- Um, okay.

- I need some air.

- [Ellie] Are you okay?

- It's gonna bruise.

[soft exhales]

[joyful piano music]

- Oh, you stole my snacky spot.

- Oh sorry.

I can move.

- [Sharyn] Don't be silly.

[chip bag crackling]

[salt shaker shaking]

[chip bag crackling]

- Oh, you want some?

Salt and vinegar.

- I'm all right,

actually, thanks.

- [Dean] It is a lot of money,

but the detailing is exquisite.

- Sorry. I dunno how

I ended up in here.

I got lost.

- We also have some fantastic

middle of the range options.

The mahogany,

the rimu,

or you could go the

maple stained medium

density fiberboard.

- Yeah, maybe.

- These are not easy decisions.

Planning a funeral is stressful

and draining and believe me,

we've seen it all.

We're not here to judge.

- Look, I appreciate

what you're doing.

It's just really hard to watch

my husband spend our savings

on such a prick.

- Oh.

- Brent tormented

Ollie his entire life.

Teased him, stole his

stuff, called him a p*ssy,

beat him up.

When we started dating,

Moira and Brent

completely cut him out,

but despite all of that

Ollie still invited

them to our wedding,

and guess who didn't show up.

- Well I bet your wedding

was better for it.

- I just don't get why Ollie

feels like he has to do this.

Moira's taking advantage of him.

If it were up to me, Brent

would be buried in a sack.

- Well, we do have some

lovely Hessian options.

[Manu chuckles]

- Sorry, I didn't mean to

dump our baggage on you.

- [Dean] No, don't be sorry.

That's just family.

[soft piano music]

What if I gave you and

Oliver the Rosewood at cost?

- Dean, we can't that's.

- No, that way everyone's happy.

- Thank you.

- [Manu] Hey.

- Hey.

- Sorry

- It's okay.

- Margot Robbie, is that you?

- I don't look

like Margot Robbie,

do I? Do I?

- What's the occasion?

- Oh. Just treating myself.

- Hey, is Beau around?

- Day off from here.

He'll be on one

of his other jobs.

What are you up to today?

- Uh, well, Mum's ignoring me,

so I'm having to take

matters into my own hands.

Do you have any fish guts?

[gags and coughs]

Sorry.

Oh man. Sorry.

- [Sharyn] It's fine.

It's fine.

- Sorry.

So do you want me

to keep pretending

that you're not pregnant?

Because I'm a, I'm

a pretty good liar.

I can.

- No, it's alright, love.

- Do you not want it?

- Oh God, no, the opposite.

I want it more than

anything in the world.

- So why?

- I just don't wanna jinx it.

I had two miscarriages

after Lauren

so I thought, oh well,

that's that then.

- I'm so sorry.

- But we're very close now.

I've always wanted three kids.

The best things come in threes.

Hanson, triangles,

the three little pigs,

Tom Cruise's wives.

- [Both] Nicole Kidman

and Katie Holmes.

- Yeah, Katie Holmes.

- Yeah and everyone forgets

Mimi Rogers.

- Who the f*ck is Mimi Rogers?

- Mm.

- Careful.

- Manu, and I had a chat and

we're happy to go through

with the Rosewood option.

- Great.

Catering?

- No changes.

- You could lose

the soup entree.

- They might love soup.

- I've never had

soup at a funeral.

- It's part of the

deluxe package.

- Which we can modify.

The memorial book, for instance.

Sometimes it's more meaningful

to make it yourself.

- Or sometimes it's just

nice to have a professional

do it for you.

- I could make the book.

- Fine, but we're

having the soup.

- Well, that just

leaves the dove release.

- The what?

- A white dove symbolizing

Brent's spirit released

at the end of the service.

- I'm happy to let that go.

- Actually it's more

of a two-person job.

- No, I mean, we

don't need that.

- We absolutely do.

- It's the soup or

the dove, Moira.

- Don't put me in this position.

- A real Sophie's Choice.

- [Dean] Well, we

got there in the end.

- The deluxe package

isn't so deluxe

now you've talked them

out of everything.

- Ollie and Manu

couldn't afford it.

- Well, they're going

with the Rosewood

so it can't be that bad.

- Yes, 'cause I said we'd

do the casket at cost.

- What?

That's two grand gone.

- Yeah, it's not

all about the money.

- Since when?

We're running a business, Dean.

- Yeah, since Hemi.

This is the sort of

thing he'd do for people.

- Yeah and look

where at got him.

He was almost bankrupt.

I want this place

to be successful.

- It is successful.

We haven't been

this busy in years.

- Yes, and we need all that cash

for the reno so we can

attract the right people.

- [Gwen] Awkward.

I could hear you guys fighting.

Where were you this morning?

- Muay Thai.

- Muay Thai?

piss off.

Oh my God.

- Why are you here?

- Fight me.

- [Ellie] No.

- What's the point of doing

Muay Thai if you won't fight me?

- Keeps me fit and it's social.

- Okay, who is your

best Muay Thai friend?

- Rhonda.

- Did you say Rhonda?

There's no way she's under 50.

- Gwen, why are you here?

- Okay, so,

I found Stu on Facebook.

- And?

- And

he's clearly using

Mum for her money.

He's a farmer.

He farms grapes.

- Like on a vineyard?

He probably owns a vineyard.

- Well, he dyes his hair.

Mm-hmm.

In 2018 it was salt and pepper,

and now, miraculously,

it's all pepper, no salt.

- Okay, you need to

sort this out with Mum.

- Yeah, well she's

ignoring my texts.

- Welcome to my world.

Look, go home, get

your stuff together,

and I'll drop you

around there tonight.

Okay, you two will work it out.

- Did Rhonda kick

you in the head?

I'm not living with Stu.

If Mum won't make

him leave, I will.

I just need some fish guts

and one of Dean's CDs.

So is this, these your ones?

- Uh.

- Why don't you

channel your energy

into something productive

like finding a job?

- Okay, look.

[joyful piano plays]

Um,

I'm telling you this

as a friend, okay?

Some sh*t's about to go down

and either you are

in on the operation

or you're out.

- I'm a 100% out.

I do not want to be involved.

I'm busy and I also don't care.

- Okay, well that's your choice.

You're not in the loop.

Out of the loop.

Totally out of the loop, okay?

- Oh, that's 22.50.

- Yeah, I'll pay you back.

What time will you

be making dinner?

- I won't be making dinner.

I've got a date tonight.

- Who are you?

Commence Operation Stu-pid.

[Gwen laughs]

Hm.

Hm.

[typing on phone]

[dial tone]

[phone vibrating]

- Can I just check

your ID please?

- Uh, yep,

yes.

- Bro, this is so bad.

- Oh, uh, no

worries, I'll just...

- Ask me for a beer.

- Can I have a beer?

- Deeper.

[clears throat]

- Can I have a beer?

- Yeah, you'll be sweet.

- Oh!

- Just take it easy, yeah?

- Yeah, cheers, bro.

- But have fun.

- Yeah.

[phone vibrating]

- All good, Chantel?

Not driving home, eh?

Better be Uber.

[dial tone]

- [Voicemail] Please leave

a message after the tone.

[sighs]

- Hello my old friend.

[upbeat orchestral music]

[faint indistinct chatter]

- Hey, don't just wave

at me put out the fire!

[groans]

Dumb twat.

[somber piano]

- As we come to the

end of the service

I invite anyone to step

forward and say a few words.

In that case.

Oh yes please.

- Hi,

I'm Ollie,

Brent's brother.

He was such an as*h*le.

[Manu lightly chuckles]

Sorry. I shouldn't

have led with that.

I remember when we were kids.

Once we got Mr. Whippy

and um, before the van

had even driven off

I dropped my sherbet cone,

but Brent had ordered a

double so he let me eat half.

That was nice.

Most of the time

he was just awful,

but I'm, I'm still

sad that he's gone.

Not that I'm gonna miss him.

Just,

we never got a

chance to fix things.

Just always held that hope.

Anyway, thank you

everyone for coming.

It's been a lovely service.

Moira, realistically,

never gonna see you again,

but I hope you have a nice life.

Okay.

Bye.

- [softly] I love you.

- Love you too.

[kisses]

- Thank you, Ollie.

[Dean scat singing]

- [Dean] [Singing] I sing

sweet love songs all night.

- [Ellie] When did we

get a chocolate fountain?

- Oh, it's mine.

It's new.

[Dean continues singing]

- And since when

do we do live jazz?

- [Dean] [singing]

Nobody, uh, and nobody

'cause for me.

[scat singing]

[singing intensifies]

[everyone clapping]

- Thanks everyone.

Uh, look, I'm gonna

take a quick five,

so don't go anywhere.

[soft chuckles] Alright.

- I didn't realize singing was

part of the deluxe package.

- Oh, I just threw that

in there for you guys.

I knew you couldn't

afford the good stuff

but I didn't want

you to miss out.

- Thank you, Dean.

You've been so generous.

- Seriously, thanks to you two

we can still afford a honeymoon.

- Oh no, you're very welcome.

- Um, heard you

guys have Facebook?

- Oh, we are rebranding, so

it is in a transitional phase.

- Well, we would love

to leave a good review.

- Well, I can send the

link when it goes live.

- Hey, random question:

has that guy ever modeled?

- [Ellie] Beau?

- I've done a bit of modeling.

- Um, I'm not sure, but he

is looking for extra work.

- They're great, aren't they?

- Yeah.

- Kinda makes it all

worthwhile, doesn't it?

- Mm.

- Oh, better get back up there.

[indistinct group chatter]

[Dean plays piano]

[Dean scat singing continues]

- Remember stilts?

- Uh huh.

- Someone was just giving

them away on Marketplace.

They even dropped them off.

- Place is a mess.

You've got to stop doing this.

- I really wish you

had higher ceilings.

I wanna go outside,

but I'm afraid of

falling on the concrete.

- Gwen, what did you do today?

Besides the stilts?

- Uh, well, I could go into it,

but you'd have to sign an NDA

because you don't have

clearance for Operation Stu-Pid.

- Are you taking your pills?

- Yes.

- Good.

It's just,

you haven't left

the house in a week.

- That's not true.

I went to the

dairy for Skittles.

- You need to find a job, Gwen.

Do you not want to

be a DJ anymore?

[Gwen sighs]

- I don't know. I guess,

[scoffs]

I just feel

like.

- Can you come down?

Sorry, I'm just

finding it really hard

to take you seriously in those.

- I'm gonna need your help.

I'll try it on the wall.

Can you need help?

- Yes.

- I have to,

if you catch my bum.

- No, I don't have you.

- Okay, okay, I can't.

This is, okay, stop it.

- Hang on, I have to hold ya.

- [Ellie] I have not got you.

- Okay, I'm gonna

need to use your bed.

I'm gonna need to use your bed.

I've been on these for hours.

I had to piss in the sink.

- Oh, Gwen.

[grunts]

Why did you sell your DJ decks?

- Because I wasn't using them.

- Why?

- [Ellie] You know why.

I wasn't getting any gigs.

Even for really good DJs

it's super competitive, so.

- I saw on your Instagram

you did a gig though, right?

You had the headphones

and the waka waka.

- I did one gig

at an internet cafe.

- But.

- Don't feel sorry for me,

it's fine.

[stammers] I had

a great holiday.

I had a very, very fun time.

It's just

now I'm back where I started,

except poor

and I don't know what to do.

What do I do?

- Well, something's

come up at work

that I think you'd

be quite good for.

- I don't want a real job.

- We need a social

media manager.

- Oh yeah?

- We're having a bit

of a brand refresh

and we want more of

an online presence.

- Yeah, I often think

that when I'm scrolling

like what's my favorite

funeral home up to today.

- Do you want the job or not?

- Yes.

- Alright, well,

if you want a ride,

I leave at 6:30 for Muay Thai

and then I go straight

from there to work.

- Okay.

[sharp exhale]

- Oh!

- You do do Muay Thai.

- Yeah, I do.

[joyful piano music plays]