- Dean darling?
Ellie's asked me to trial
a selection of fancy food
options for the rebrand
and I need a fresh mouth.
- With pleasure.
- Okay. We've got a mini pikelet
with margarine and anchovy.
- Mmm.
- We've got spinach and feta in a shot glass.
- How do you...?
- Just with your tongue.
- Okay.
- And we've got a lightly
battered chicken breast
with a tomato dressing.
- That's a nugget with sauce.
- Damn it. I thought I'd
get away with that one.
- Is that a raw prawn?
- Yes, but it's on a soup spoon.
- That's a hard, no.
Oh, Shez. I'm sorry.
I.. It's very creative.
I, I just, I ate and...
- No, it's not that.
I'm really gonna miss you guys
when I go on maternity leave.
I have to take three weeks off!
- I'm pretty sure it's six months.
- Don't say that.
I'll go crazy.
- You can come visit us whenever you like.
- What if you like my
replacement more than me?
You better not get Priyanka
from Petite Patisserie.
- We, I might have floated the idea.
Is she bad?
- No. She's brilliant.
Best cupcakes in town.
- That's good.
- She can ice anything.
I seen her do a horse
with a saddle.
- Wow.
- You won't want me back,
once your lips have
touched Priyanka's goodies.
- Oh, Shez! Your job will be waiting
for you whenever you are ready.
No one could replace you.
Now, pass me that pikelet.
I am curious.
- Okay.
What about -
chase it with that?
- Yep.
- Just slop it down.
[bouncy piano music]
- So gimme the insights.
How many follows and likes
on our socials. Are our numbers going up
and what is our reach?
- You're way too young to be this cringe-y.
- The good news is, is that
we are getting some traction
on Instagram.
The bad news is that it's mainly comments
wanting to see more Beau with
less clothing on him.
- What's "hashtag faddy"?
- Funeral daddy.
- Well, that just means
our audience is engaged.
Maybe this is our point of difference.
We are young
and dope
and authentic.
- Ooh. Ellie. Ooh.
- We could be the acai bowl of funeral homes.
Irresistibly grammable.
- We could get some social
media influences on board.
We could do some discount codes?
I see untapped potential.
I'm ready to make some waves.
Grab your surfboard guys.
We're gonna go cowabunga.
- I don't, I don't know what to do with this.
I don't know.
- Well, I've just given you a lot of ideas.
So go away. Have a think and
we can pick this up again later.
Dean, did you wanna add anything?
- No, I'm still digesting.
- Great. Thank you, Gwen.
- Oh, can you please drop me at Mom's later?
- I don't wanna get dragged into your pranks.
- It's not a prank. I wanna say sorry.
- So you're over the whole Stu thing?
- No, I'm just changing tack.
I'm making apology cupcakes.
- You don't know how to make cupcakes.
- No, but Sharon can.
[water rushing]
- Hi.
- Hello?
- How's the, um... toilet.
- Good.
Yeah. Started disconnect the old one.
- Cool.
- It was very cool.
- So, I just wanted to make it clear
that while the other night was pleasant,
I don't wanna lead you on.
So, that was just casual and
it won't be happening again.
- Huh.
Okay. Wow.
- Oh, you okay?
- Yeah. Yeah. No, I'm fine.
I'm just a bit shocked, that's all.
- Oh.
No worries. I just, I just
thought we had something.
My parents really wanna meet you.
I've also been shopping for
for rings as well and um,
will you marry me, Ellen?
- Yeah. My name's not Ellen.
- Really? I thought
Ellie was short for Ellen.
- It's not.
- Eleanor.
- No.
- Elisabeth then.
- No, it's just, it's just Ellie.
- Oh, okay. Ellie. My
Auntie is gonna be gutted.
Do you wanna come to Christmas?
- Yep.
You're joking.
- Well, thanks for coming in
here and not making it weird.
- I don't, I, I don't make it weird.
- I can feel you staring at my crotch.
- Oh my God.
Because you've, you've
got a big stain right there
and I just want you to get it out.
Not like that!
Oh my God.
Just, I'm-Ah. You know what I mean.
[bed thumping and heavy breathing]
- [Ellie] Woo!
[bouncy piano music]
- [Beau] What's that one?
- [Gwen] I think it's meant to be a horse.
- [Beau]} Do you want me to wait?
- [Gwen] No. As soon as she
sees a cupcake, she'll cave.
Pack your bags, Stu. Gwennie's home.
Who is that?
Why is she using my cup?
What the f*ck?
Mom?
Who is that?
Who is she?
- Gwen, open the door.
- Who's that girl?
- Come around.
- Is that spaghetti?
That's f*cking spaghetti.
Let me in!
- Gwen. What are you doing here?
- What am I doing here?
This is my f*cking house.
What is she doing here?
- Abby? Eating bolognese.
- Yeah, and getting her manky f*cking mouth
all over my curly straw.
Mom! That is my special Movie World cup.
You know that!
- Shh! Be nice.
Abby is Stu's daughter.
She's only here every other week.
- Where does she sleep?
- In the guest room.
- f*ck!
- What's going on?
- Oh, hello!
Look who's here.
- Gwen? Do you wanna come in?
- No, you f*ck wit.
- Gwen!
- [Stu] Are you alright?
- What the f*ck is going on?
Like, are you guys just a
happy little wnau now or what?
- Don't do this.
I will not tolerate this behavior.
- Suck a fat one, Mum.
You hardly know this guy and
you're already, like,
cooking bolognese for his little brats.
- You're 25. Grow up.
- Ellie was right.
You do pick favorites.
And right now, it's these two randoms.
Hey sweetie!
Don't get too comfy, okay?
Because one day you'll
go to Bali, you'll come back
and there'll be some other
skank slurping your spaghetti!
- Just leave.
- Oh, I came here to apologize, Mom,
but actually f*ck this,
f*ck you, and f*ck OFF!
- Get out!
- Eat sh*t, Stu! Eat sh*t!
[Gwen roars]
- That's not my car.
- f*ck!
[classical music]
[door opens and bell jingles]
[toilet flushes]
[tools clatter]
- Oh. Kobe. I totally
forgot you were even here.
How's it all going?
- Good. Good.
All finished.
- Really?
- Yeah.
- Uh, what about the shower?
- What about the shower?
- The um...
See that?
Water pressure's really bad.
I'm pretty sure I asked you to fix it.
- You just making stuff up,
cause you don't want me to leave?
- No, I use the shower all the time
after Muay Thai.
- Okay. Now you are just making stuff up.
- Why does everyone
find it so hard to believe
I do Muay Thai?
- Mm.
- Ellie, something's come up with dad.
Do you mind holding down the fort?
- No worries. Yeah.
[air freshener sprays]
- You like that?
Coconut?
It's kind of tropical island vibes.
I love the beach.
Not all beaches, obviously,
not the rocky ones.
- Hmmm.
- I like sand.
Did you wanna f*ck?
[bouncy piano music]
- Hello?
I can see you.
- Yeah. Sorry.
I'm, um, I'm not meant to smoke or
interact with clients.
That's why I hid from you.
- I'd like to plan a funeral.
- Okey dokey.
I'm just, I'm gonna go get my sister Ellie..
Just, yeah. Wait right here.
[bed thumping and heavy breathing]
- [Ellie] Um, excuse me?
Sorry, can you go faster please?
[bed thumping accelerates]
[Kobe grunting]
- [Ellie] Thank you!
Thank you!
- It says name at the top.
I wrote Gwen, but I think they mean your's.
- Robin.
- Like Batman. Cool. Name of deceased.
- Robin.
- Weird. Two Robins.
Okay. Relationship to deceased.
- It's me.
I'm dying.
- Man.
That sucks.
- Yeah, that does.
- How long have you got?
- Couple months.
- What? You don't even look sick.
You look gorgeous.
- Thanks. Cuz I stopped chemo.
- So you wanna plan a funeral for you?
- Yeah.
I don't want my family to have to worry
about all this stuff.
I wanna prepay everything.
It's tough enough on the masses.
- Whoa. That's so thoughtful.
- Here's what I want.
Lots of bright flowers.
No religious crap. Closed casket.
No photos from 2015. All over in 45 minutes.
- What happened in 2015?
- I got a pixie cut.
- Yeah. Fair enough.
- And I don't want anyone wearing black.
My daughter will wanna wear her Elsa dress
and I don't want her to feel self-conscious.
- And you have a daughter.
This is, yeah, this is rough.
This is really sad.
This is a really sad experience.
More for you, but a
little bit for me, as well.
- Suck it up.
I need your help.
- All right.
Burial or cremation?
- I wanna be buried
so my family can come visit.
- Are you sure?
Because if you get cremated,
you can be like, shot into
space or made into a firework.
Kinda cool.
- Who's gonna sh**t me into space? You?
- No, a scientist, obviously.
- Call me old fashioned,
but I'll take the burial.
- Okay-ay. Oh, what
kind of music do you want?
- Michael Jackson.
- Ooh, Robin, no! You can't.
What about Eric Clapton Tears in Heaven
or Mariah Carey One
Sweet Day, or what's that...
Only Love Can Break Your Heart by Neil Young?
- I think I want this one.
- How come?
- Because it's pretty and I'm paying for it.
- Do you wanna know how much it costs?
- Nah.
- Okay. Going once, going twice, sold
to the bougie lady in the head scarf!
[Robin giggles]
- Chuck it on my tab!
- Okay.
So, this is where you would
be having the reception after.
Oh, Hi Trisha.
This is Robin.
- Hi. How are you?
- Well, not great.
Just tried making my muesli,
but we're outta soy milk.
- Bugger!
- Yeah. And after the morning
I've had, it doesn't seem to
matter which wall I'm working on, the sun
just keeps getting in my eyes.
- Don't you hate that?
- And I've lost a button.
- Robin's dying of cancer.
- All right. Well, if you find the button...
let me know.
- She won't be here on the day.
- [Ellie] Oh!
Shez! I didn't know you
were here. It's your day off.
- Oh yeah.
I'm just testing my new robot.
Check it out.
Cinnamon.
- When did we get this?
- I got it with my fun money. Magic!
- Yeah. Wow.
- What have you been up to?
- Just in the bathroom
with Kobe. For talking.
He is a nice guy.
- He is, isn't he?
Yeah. We've always been really close.
- How come he never thought of him for me?
- Oh. Well you want kids.
- Does Kobe not want kids?
- Lordy! How do I say this?
He doesn't
do sex.
- What do you, what do you mean?
- He's bisexual.
He said bye to sex a long time ago.
- Asexual.
- Exactly. Here, boy!
You want a sexual person.
- So I think you might be mixing...
- Oh, look at him go.
He's gobbling those peas
like they're nothing!
- Very clever.
- Well, if the sex thing doesn't bother you,
I'm pretty sure he doesn't play cricket.
- That's a plus.
Does he own a house?
- No, that's why he's staying with us
but he's very easy to live with.
Always unloads a dishwasher,
lights a match after number twos.
- Does he have a five year plan?
- I think he's more of a
go-with-the-flow kind of guy.
You know, free spirit?
Spent all his money on the big trip.
So, I'm not sure what's next.
Oh, okay.
Banana's the limit.
- Are you scared?
- No.
- What are you gonna miss the most?
- My kids.
- Well, yeah, obviously.
I meant what food?
- Potatoes.
[Gwen laughs]
- Seriously?
- I f*ck' LOVE fries!
- What did you tell your kids?
- The truth.
It's gonna be brutal, but
they'll still have their dad.
Batman.
- Will you be pissed if he moves on?
- Course not.
He deserves to be happy.
- Do you believe in heaven?
- Not really.
- Okay. Say you did.
Who would you wanna hang out with up there?
- Michael Jackson.
- Robin. We have been through this. No.
- Put down You Are Not Alone for the song.
- Your funeral.
Do you believe reincarnation?
What would you wanna come back as, a Robin?
Eh, too cliche?
- You ask a lot of questions.
- Yeah. Sorry.
- No, I like it.
Most people just tiptoe around me.
What are you meant to be doing right now?
- Social media.
- Oh, that's how I found
you guys. On Facebook.
I have to admit, I stalked
your hot hearse driver.
- Back off. He's mine.
- Good for you.
- Ye-ah.
- Can I give you some advice?
- Sure.
- Quit smoking.
- Is that,
is that what made you sick?
- No, it's just f*cking gross.
- Okay.
- See ya, Gwen.
- Sorry.
- Ah, I didn't answer your question.
I'd like to come back as a tiger.
- That's badass.
See ya.
Oh sh*t.
[Birds singing]
[Gwen sobbing]
- Oh, Gwen, there you are.
- Hey.
- Hey, are you alright?
- Yeah. Can you please
do everything on this list?
- Sorry. What is this?
- It's what Robin wants and it's really
important, okay, so just...
- Gwen, did you engage with a client?
- Yeah. Cuz you were
busy f*cking the plumber.
Oh, Trisha, hey, all yours.
- I don't know what you heard, but...
- Yeah I just need a moment.
- Okay.
- That lady gone?
Proper down buzz, eh?
- [Gwen] Robin was so cool.
She was planning her own funeral,
so her family didn't have to.
Is it normal to think
about other people first?
Like, this is where my mind goes, okay?
I don't suit a head scarf.
I've never been to Coachella.
There is a lot of incriminating
material on my laptop.
Also, why me?
Am I a terrible person?
- [Beau] No, just between you and me.
I wanna be buried with all my sneakers
so my brother who's
just like, this total skucks
can't wear them and make
them look better than I do.
- Wait a second.
Since when did you have a hot brother?
- Man. Just forget I said anything.
- Can you hold this while I go on the swing?
- How's your mom?
- [Little Girl] She's at work.
- Um,
I haven't spoken to her.
I'm a bit embarrassed.
I called a 12 year old a skank.
- She know you didn't mean it.
- I meant it.
I just feel a bit tragic.
Like I can't even drive.
I'm 25 and I'm crashing at my sister's.
I'm fighting with my mom.
- You're not tragic.
And like, I don't think you
need your mom as much
as you think you do.
You know, you're doing pretty well
at work and getting all the likes and stuff.
- Only on the pics of you.
But now I think I should get your brother in.
- [Little Girl] He's at school.
- Okay. I was serious about
your T-shirts, by the way.
- What?
- People would buy them.
- Be shirts.
That's what I call my business.
- Like B for Beau?
- No, no like Be Shirts, like "Be a shirt."
- See, this is why people
think you smoke weed.
- [Little Girl] Hi, weed.
- Where's your owner?
- Hey.
- Hello.
- Shower's done, so I'm all finished.
- Cool. Thank you for all your hard work.
We really appreciate you coming in.
- All good.
Shez says you were asking after me.
- No, no I, well,
I was, but not for me.
For my friend.
- Really? What's your friend's name?
- Shin.. La.. Ni.
- That's very exotic.
Where's she from?
- Hamilton, but she's French
and she she's traveled quite a lot.
There's actually a lot of French
people in...
- You're a really bad liar.
- Will you go date with me?
- I feel like that would be unprofessional.
- Okay. So you'll have
sex with me in the toilet
of your funeral home, but
it would be unprofessional
for us to go on, you know,
an actual, proper date.
That's interesting set of standards, there.
- You are not what I'm looking for.
- Really? Cause I think you like me.
- I like tin tans as well,
but you can't live off them.
They are junk food.
- Junk food?
- Yeah.
It's, you know, tempting
and fine in moderation
but I, I'm trying to eat more salad.
- Okay. So that, that means no?
- I can do better.
- Okay.
Ouch.
All good.
I'll just email you the invoice, then.
- Ellie?
- Oh my God!
How'd you get in?
- Well, you shouldn't
leave your door unlocked.
- Where's Gwen?
- I don't know. I think she's out.
- Good. Good. Good. Good.
Can you take that thing off?
- Oh, it says 20 minutes.
- Go.
- Yeah.
- Did you hear about Gwen's meltdown?
- Um. No?
- She had a tantrum in front of Stu and Abby.
- Who's Abby?
- His daughter. Gwen threw cupcakes.
I'm really happy with Stu, Ellie,
and I will not let her ruin this for me.
You need to talk to her.
- Oh, I don't wanna get involved.
- Well, why did you tell
her that I play favorites?
- I don't think I would've said that.
- So what did you say?
- I might've said that she's
always been your favorite.
- That's ridiculous.
I have always treated you both equally.
- You're definitely closer with Gwen.
- Well, that's because you
chose to spend all your time
with Koro and you love to rub my face in it.
- What?
- Oh, we get it.
You are the daughter he always wanted.
- I didn't think that by
hanging out with Koro,
I was choosing him over you.
You're my Mom.
Everyone needs their Mom.
- You don't. You're independent.
Why can't Gwen be like you?
- Oh, sorry.
Like, you have babied her, her entire life
and now all of a sudden you're
expecting her to be an adult?
She microwaved a can.
- Spaghetti?
- Yes, and I'm not surprised
she had a meltdown, like,
you should have given her a
heads up about Stu and Gabby.
- Abby.
- It's kind of your fault.
Don't saddle me with all your problems.
Like, take some responsibility.
And fix your own car.
- Fine.
Fine!
[Ellie exhaling with each jab]
- Sorry. I'm sorry. I'm
sorry. Sorry. I'm sorry.
Sorry. Sorry.
Sorry.
- Oh my God.
Have you been in there the whole time?
- Yes, because when I came
home, you were in the shower.
So I hid and I was gonna
jump out and scare you
but then mom came over and
you guys started talking about me
and it never felt like the right time.
- Was I bad? I'm trying
to remember what I said.
- No, no, no. No, no no.
You were awesome!
- I wee'd my pants a little bit.
- Oh, okay. I was gonna hug you.
- I got so scared.
- Oh!
- Okay.
[talk radio playing]
[light switch clicks]
[end theme]
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