02x12 - Who's Afraid of Boomsday Again?

[bunniefuu]

Ruff, ruff, ruff, ruff ♪

Ruff, ruff, ruff,

ruff, ruff, ruff ♪

Ruff, ruff, ruff, ruff ♪

Ruff, ruff, ruff, ruff,

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Ruff, ruff, ruff, ruff ♪

- Ruff, ruff, ruff, ruff ♪

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Guys, guys, calm down.

Boomsday is just humans

trying to blow up the sky.

It's horrible, but we get

through it every summer.

Oh, god!

This is the end!

What

- Aah!

- Aah!

- We're all gonna die!

- Wait

- Ooh aah!

Damn it!

So no one did the

visualization techniques

- I gave you?

- Oh, we were bad students.

Get the paddle.

Ohh! You know what?

I can't help you

if you're not willing

to help yourselves.

If my hoof gets blown off,

take me to Madonna's

butt doctor!

Aah!

Ugh. Maybe I should just give

up and go into real estate.

In this market?

Ah! I can't take these booms!

Make them stop!

I can't live in here forever.

I'm running out of

underwear crotches to eat.

Chief, I really need a break

from dealing with

everyone's problems.

If you're so scared,

just go hang out with Jill.

I'm so scared,

I don't know who Jill is!

- Bye, kiddoes!

- Who the hell is that?

I'm off to my "1619 project"

listening and nodding party.

She can't leave!

Honey, do something!

Why is it always my job

to do something?

Oh, no.

You two seem very upset.

- We're fine!

- I have conflicting feelings

about medicating you, but the

thundershirt isn't helping,

and I kept the thunderpants

for myself.

Oh, my god!

Honey, do something!

Could you just handle

something on your own?

I'm so sick of everyone else's

.problems.

Fine.

I can handle this on my own.

I can do

anything I put my

mind to

I mean, it's supposed to be

a government of the animals,

by the animals, for the

Oh, don't help me

animals?

So I'm gonna take matters

into my own paws,

get rid of the booms,

and make the world

a better place for all of us.

That means you, pal.

- Thanks, pal.

- It's my pleasure.

We will all benefit from my

naiveite and misplaced optimism.

I'm here to make

my mark on Washington.

Hey, Senator McTurtle.

Big Boom has been terrorizing

us animals for decades,

and it has to stop.

So I went to the place

where things get done

social media but said some

things that got me kicked off,

so now I'm here.

- Will you help me?

- Whoa, whoa, whoa.

What's your name, son?

Chief, but you can call me

Chiefy, Chief baby,

or @mrfloofypants.

Well, Chiefy,

while I admire your gumption,

that's not my committee.

But just inside that building

are countless senators

who would be more than happy

to help a courageous

canine like you.

All you have to do

is knock on their doors.

Good luck, and dogspeed.

I need you to keep

your eye on a dog named Chief.

He's digging around

where he doesn't belong.

And when he's done with that,

I think he's going to do

some investigating.

Sick of dealing

with everyone else's problems.

Problems problems

Ohh

Oh! It's already

quarter past sunrise o'clock!

Hold on, be right there!

Ooh! I gotta lay off

those late-night squirrels.

- You didn't tell me you were goin' out.

- I didn't know I had to.

You get your butt

back here, Honey now!

- Sorry, Chief. Don't wait up!

- Don't you tell me not

- Let's go, let's go!

- Relaxicon, here we come!

North America's second-largest

boom-free relaxation festival!

And a break from fixing

everyone's problems.

Before we know it,

we'll be up to

our exposed anuses

in cucumber water.

Wait, wait, this is my dream.

I wanna drive.

- Fine.

- Ow!

Sorry. I'm not used to legs.

Road trip!

- Say "no booms!"

- No booms!

Two dogs, 12 teats, no rules!

Good afternoon. I'm here to talk

to the senator about boom regul

Good afternoon,

I'm here to talk about

Ohh who would have thought

it'd be so hard

to get something done

in Washington?

- You want a belly rub?

- Oh, no thank you, sex hamster.

But I totally respect

your gross profession.

A phone?

Trapped in a glass box?

I'll help you, phone!

Hello?

Aah!

- Hello, @mrfloofypants.

- How do you know my handle?

Everyone's talking about

the dog

who's got the ba*ls

to go up against Big Boom.

They can't mean me.

I don't have any

ba*ls!

I have ba*ls!

Normally, I don't have those.

You're dreaming big, kid,

but you're on the wrong side.

Big Boom could use a dog like you.

- So I'm gonna write down an offer

- There's no amount of

Wow. That is a lotta bacon.

Chiefy, even with those

white-hot dream ba*ls,

Big Boom is too powerful to fight.

Everything relies on Big Boom

agriculture, military,

- the Vengaboys.

- Oh, yeah?

Lemme ask you something.

Is that one cat?

Yes.

Oh, cool.

Lemme ask you something else.

Why is a raccoon like you

on the side of Big Boom?

Don't you get scared too?

And what about all 700

of your uneaten children?

Sure, but we hide down here,

and if the booms get too loud,

we'll just move to New Zooland

with the money we made

off Big Boom.

And now you're probably

gonna ask,

"ooh, what about the animals

"who can't afford

underground hideouts

- "or land in New Zooland? Waah!"

- I was gonna ask that.

Well, we don't worry

about them,

because they're not our base.

I'm gonna tell

Senator McTurtle about this.

Ha, please. I've got

Senator McTurtle in my pocket.

Chiefy!

Room in here for one more.

- Senator McTurtle?

- That's right, Chief.

This fight goes all the way

to the top.

- Top of what?

- The top of the tippy.

- The tippy top?

- Monkey! Show this dumb dog out.

You don't scare me.

All you've done is make me

more determined than ever

How are your hands so soft?

Even though it's a convertible,

it's more fun like this.

Uh, Honey, I have a problem.

Nuh-uh.

We agreed: No problems.

I have to pee,

but if you don't wanna stop,

I can just hold it in until

it comes out of my eyes like tears.

Well, well, well.

What do we have here?

Yeah, it's me Max the pig

as the police officer in your dream.

I expected better from you, Honey.

Sorry.

If you're not comfortable,

- I can try again.

- Nah, it's fine.

I'm here.

Let's do this.

Where you two city sniffers

headed?

Oh, we're just going

to Relaxicon

to escape the booms

and annoying problems.

Like the one

we're dealing with now.

Now, public pee-pee

is against the law

in these parts, ladies.

I'm gonna have to give you

a urination citation.

Well, I'm gonna have to

- Oh aah!

- Elsa!

That escalated quickly!

Oh, my god, oh, my god.

Drive!

You bit a cop!

What were you thinking?

- I k*lled a beaver in Memphis. Drive!

- What?

All I wanted to do was

get away from the booms

at Relaxicon,

and now we're fugitives,

Which is kind of exciting,

but really annoying.

I wish I was on this trip

with someone else!

- Aah

- What?

- Oh, hi, Tabitha.

- We are target of police pursuit?

- You do pedals, I steer.

- Aah!

Son of a me!

- He's gaining on us.

- Moscow drift now!

Ah Oh

Aah!

- You're welcome.

- Relaxicon, here we come.

Ow! My g*n's loose!

Missed me! Ha ha ha ha

Ow!

This is a protest

against Big Boom

and its hold

on the American animal!

We will no longer

hide under beds or take meds.

No beds, no meds!

No beds, no meds!

Oh, my god,

I'm being the change,

and it's making me

more attractive.

Which is not why I got into

this, but, you know

- Oh, my god!

- They won't silence us!

- We gotta get outta here!

- Holy howl, the po-po's here!

Okay, disband immediately.

You don't have permits

to protest here,

- and you're off leash.

- Yeah. What he said.

We have the right to

assemble, I read somewhere.

Noooo, not if

you're endangering the public.

Come on, man, we're all high

on CBD joint supplements.

- This is a peaceful protest.

- Not anymore.

They shut down our protest

and left us no choice.

So welcome to the

Boom offense organizing movement.

- or BOOM.

- Meow!

- Sorry. I'm afraid of acronyms.

- This is our last chance

to memorize the map

of the Boom factory

and its access points

here, here, here, here,

here, here, here,

here, here, here, here.

There's a lotta access.

If anyone's gettin'

cold paws, listen to this.

Mrs. McTurtle, tell our friends

what the senator

- let slip in the throes of passion.

- The part about him needing

to be punished and how he

wanted me to stand on his

Duh-ehh! No!

About the booms.

Oh. Well, they've known

about the devastating harm

that booms cause to animals

but hid the research.

Thank you, Darla.

We know how hard it must be to

put your loyalty to the cause

- above your relationship with the senator.

- Oh, it's not that hard.

So we all know what this means.

When facing injustice,

there is no choice but to act.

I'm razzle dazzle!

It's time to give them

a taste of their own booms!

And that's when you said,

"it's time to give them

a taste of their own booms."

- Isn't that correct, Chief?

- This is bullcrap, man!

We all know

what's goin' on here.

You're just using us

to distract from the bigger

Bailiff, please shake a can

of pennies at the defendant.

Ah!

You trespassed on private property.

But before you could carry out

your dastardly as*ault,

you were distracted

by the FRPB.

The Federal reserve

of peanut butter

is there for national

emergencies only!

Like what, a jelly NATO?

- Order!

- There will be no order

until you put a stop

to this hypocrisy, man!

- Order!

- Yeah!

Order! All right, that's it.

We're adjourning for lunch.

- I am starving. I'll buy us snacks.

- I don't have any money.

Maybe that's because it's

a concept I don't understand.

I mean, a currency backed by

a mutual agreement of value?

- That doesn't make sense.

- Leave this to me.

Hello. Can I please have

a pack of catnip?

Sure can, now that it's legal.

- Meow!

- Nice and easy, and no one gets squirt.

- Hey, Abs, grab those bags of Kibble for me.

- Uh, okay.

And I don't love

the objectification,

but I do appreciate

the compliment.

And you are going to

give me all of your cash.

And you're going to start

counting

and not call the cops

until you get to 100.

Okay. One, two,

um, I wanna say tomato?

- Three!

- I dunno. I'm pretty sure it's tomato.

Get in!

Drive, drive, drive!

So now I'm implicated in an

as*ault on a police officer,

robbing a convenience store, and

we're adding a sexy cat to our crew?

I gotta say, I liked your

moves back at that minimart.

- Yeah, you did.

- But I would have done it differently.

I take pride in being courteous.

- So what do you do?

- It goes a little something like this.

All right, cats and dogs,

let's see who'll win the prize

for keepin' their cool.

This squirt g*n is loaded,

but if nobody gets upset,

nobody gets wet.

Aah!

Okay, that was fun.

Now get out.

Well, thank you both

for a lovely evening.

I finally find a cat

who isn't terrified of me,

and you kick him out?

If you hadn't gotten us

this Kibble, you'd be out too.

- Wait where is it?

- What?

It's gone

the catnip, the Kibble.

- He robbed us!

- Damn, he's good.

This is all your fault.

If you hadn't gotten

so sidetracked by his rippling,

rock-hard, well-defined

abs, we would be listening

to whale sounds at Relaxicon!

But now it's all about

your drama.

- I wish I were with someone else.

- Aah!

Well, well, well!

Somebody's been a bad girl.

Ooh! It's me, it's me!

Wait stop!

What am I doing?

Goodbye, Shel!

Nibbles!

Ah, that's better.

- Or is it?

- Nope.

Can you point out the dog

who was intending to destroy

the Boom factory?

That Saint Bernard there,

@mrfloofypants.

In hindsight, it may have been a

mistake to trust the senator's wife.

You thought you could

compete with this?

Bllllll!

I've heard enough.

I hereby sentence you

- to ten dog years in prison.

- Gulp.

And in the case of hot

or not, you're hot.

Chief! Chief!

My voice will never

be silenced.

Never be

- Boo!

- Chief! Chief!

Chief! Chief! Chief!

All right, chow time, Chief.

Oh, man, I forgot about

my hunger strike!

- Ah, I'll start tomorrow.

- You got a visitor.

Chief, old boy,

how are you holding up?

- Uncle Nathan?

- Not your uncle.

Even in a drug-induced dream,

not your uncle.

I work in the White dog house.

The president would like

to see you personally.

The president of the

United steaks of America?

Oh, my god.

It's your dream, Chief.

You could make yourself

a little smarter.

- Madam president.

- Honey? You're the president?

Of course! Who else

would it be Max?

Walkies with me.

Chief, I need your help.

When I took office,

I made a promise to the american

animal to eradicate the booms.

And you've produced

an enormous,

- well-formed movement.

- Yeah. I make a lot of those.

What are you doing? We don't

have time for a pit stop.

Just wait out here

for two minutes.

My ex lives here. He'll hook

us up with all the essentials

- food, money, oils.

- Thanks, Nibbles.

For once, someone is solving

my problems.

Ahh.

I ate his face!

We gotta get outta here!

Go, go, go!

Unbelievable! I'm stuck dealing

with someone else's problems again.

You know I can hear you.

I may be covered

in someone else's blood,

- but I still have feelings.

- Aah!

- Why is everyone but me so annoying?

- Aah!

- Hello, Honey.

- Hello, Honey!

- Ahh perfect.

- Ahh perfect.

Help me finally do what

every president before me

- has been afraid to.

- Hump the leg of the Lincoln memorial?

Please. I do that three times

before breakfast.

- I mean defeat Big Boom.

- I'm your dog, madam president.

What's that?

It's me!

My tail is gonna explode!

We've got a bark alarm

level 5 here with dotus.

Uncle Nathan?

You set me up!

- Not your uncle, and yes.

- He used me to get to you.

He's working for Big Boom!

Yes, I am.

See? That was smarter.

But not smart enough.

- Get her outta here!

- We don't have time!

- I'm on it!

- Ooh, that looks fun.

Not the time put it in my

calendar for tonight:

if still alive, chase tail.

- Got it!

- Now what?

- I don't know. I've never caught it before.

- Let me help you.

No, no! I'm gonna

solve this problem myself.

Aah!

Looks like booms

are back on the menu, boys.

Aah!

- Chief, you saved us!

- And now I need your help.

To pass legislation

outlawing booms forever?

Oh, sure, but first

help me get this racoon

outta my butt.

- This is my favorite song.

- Mine too.

Fried sweet potatoes

are my favorite.

- Samesies.

- But maybe we should slow down a bit.

You get the best gas mileage

driving 65 to

75 miles per hour.

I know. I'm going 75.

Ooh.

Going a little fast, aren't we?

I know how to drive.

- Ooh, she's in a mood.

- You don't even know.

- I can hear you!

- What are you doing 77?

- What are you running from?

- Where's the sun block?

You're not a good girl.

- You're an average girl at best.

- Okay, got it.

- Can we please stop?

- Let's just have some quiet.

- Your peers have all surpassed you.

- Aah!

I can't take one more

minute of me!

Aah!

- Oh

- Wha Oh!

- I had the craziest dream.

- I had the craziest dream.

- But I won't bore you with it.

- But I won't bore you with it.

- Thank you.

- Thank you.

- But I will tell you what I learned from it.

- Ooh! I'm listening.

I get what you were all

growly about earlier.

I may not have giant

dream ba*ls,

but I have the power

to help myself.

So from now on, I'm not gonna

bother you with my stuff.

No, no, no, please bother me.

I'll spend as much time as you

want talking about your problems.

It's way less annoying

than talking to myself.

That's sweet, Honey,

but this old dog can handle

- whatever comes

- Aah!

Why does this have to be so scary?

It's okay, Chief.

Shh, shh.

- President Honey's got you.

- Aw.

Huh?

Oh, it was so exciting

to read this scene

because, as an actor,

it's really enjoyable

to have all the lines

and all the screen time and

Honey, there's another of you!

- Where did she come from?

- They're both me.

We shot the scenes multiple times,

- and then they composited us

- Whoa! There's another one!

So what are they, clones or something?

- No, it's a video effect.

- Ah there's another clone!

Yeah, fine.

They're clones, Chief.

- Are you a clone?

- No.

That's exactly

what a clone would say.

- I'm not a clone.

- Well, where are

- all the other clones?

- Fox put them all down

- after the sh**t.

- Hmm. Probably would have

been easier just to redraw you.