01x05 - Respect

[bunniefuu]

Should saucy sharks
seek shelter soon?

Should saucy sharks
seek shelter soon?

Should saucy sharks
seek shelter...

Man you're getting shark
sauce all over the mirror.

And you're getting dragon
breath all over me.

Why are you so close?

Because it makes me look better.

Should
saucy shark seek-

Good morning dad.

Morning son.

Shark sauce.

Dragon breath.

Man, I miss having my own room.

Man, I miss having my own food.

You know when I was growing up,

my entire
house was smaller

than this full suite.

All right, all right.

I guess we've been spending
so much time together,

you all are used to my
priceless life lessons.

Well, I think all of his
family together-ness,

is fantastic. Yoink.

Mh, hmm!

Is this bothering you?

You okay baby?

I just need some alone time.

Welcome to duets week,

where you and your partner will
be practically inseparable.

I love duets!

Me too, two voices coming
together, indistinguishable.

With their dragon breath
and snorty laughs?

Are you okay?

Get off my bacon!

Sorry.

Now you are all going to
be randomly paired off.

And even though I know everyone
will rock the house down,

sadly one duo will
be eliminated.

Looks like I'm
gonna have to carry

someone across the finish line.

Well, he must be strong, if
he's going to carry a person

and his ego.

Let's duet!

Calvin, oh my sweet
Georgia peach,

come on up and
choose your partner.

oh, well read it!

I did.

Out loud! No.

You're halfway there. Ah...

Yes that's it! Noah, come on up.

You just got lucky.

Ooh, Bikini beach disaster.

Aliens detect the most epic
beach party of this summer.

That sounds delightful.

Charge to room, and here we go-

Hey little man, what's up?

Hand me the remote.

We've got 300 channels.
No need to rent a movie.

But Bikini beach disaster

is the most epic beach
party this summer!

Uh-huh, but it'll be
free in two months.

Waiting is just
good economic sense.

Speaking of which let's
watch the financial news.

What's on TV?

A horror show.

Ugh, there's got to be
something we can all enjoy.

You know, Calvin seemed a
little stressed earlier.

You know how he is.

Always spending all that
time up in his room,

all by himself,
singing by himself.

And now surrounded by
people all day long.

You're probably right.

That could make
anyone a little tense.

If he's a little
tense, what about me?

A little tense!

Thank goodness
we're stable adults

and not stressed out like kids.

Right?

So, partner, what song
do you want to do?

I'm feeling a high
energy. What about-

Shiny happy
people! I just got chills!

You two disgust me. But
in a shiny happy way.

And there's your
partner, strumming away.

He's neither shiny nor happy.

Well, he's a little shiny,
like a Greek statue.

Yes I did!

Whatever.

Come on Calvin. Maybe
it won't be so bad.

You're right. Maybe I just
need to have an open mind.

I just hope he's
not controlling.

Calvin!

Oh,

Hey.

I guess we could go over
the song we're gonna sing.

I already got a
song ready to go.

There it is, it's
called "Big Wheels".

Have a listen, we'll
work on it tomorrow.

Can you believe this guy?

Oh, hey bro.

What is all this?

Now I know you've
been a little tense

and I've been a little tense.

So I figured I'd build
myself a little tent,

to give us both
a little privacy.

You're welcome.

Ugh! This is so bad.

Nope! Ah-uh. I
will not sing that.

Hey hey, what's with
all the shouting?

Wait a minute, you
sleep right here?

Jaxon was throwing a
tent party all night!

It was keeping me up!

Mh, I hear you, we all hear you.

And I know what you're saying,

your mama's nose whistling
kept me up all night.

Hey, since we're both awake

we might as well watch
some financial news.

Uh, as fun as that sounds,

I'm gonna go to rehearsal,
and eat breakfast there.

Oh, okay then.

This is where you join in.

Come on!

I don't even
understand the song.

It's totally clear Richards.

It's a love song, from the
point of view of the tractor.

What?

Okay, is it so important
that we sing this song?

We didn't even talk about it.

It has to be this song.

Why? I'm not trying
to be a jerk,

but I'm also not gonna sing
something I don't like!

Can we please just
try it one more time?

Doing yoga. Trying to focus.

Just need to get something.

Is it some hand lotion?

No, it's a sweater.

Then get it.

It's not in here.

Then get out.

Okay. Okay.

It's the kids, I'm
worried about the kids.

You see Calvin was
sleeping on the couch,

because Jaxon was
sleeping in a tent

and then Calvin was
shouting on his phone

and neither one of them

are concerned about
their financial health.

The good time's over.

Perhaps all our family
togetherness is a bit much.

The boy's cortisol
levels are rising

from their prolonged exposure
to repetitive stimuli.

What?

What?

Exposure to repetitive stimuli.

Oh nevermind, your
father and I have decided

to give you some alone time.

We'll be right downstairs
in the restaurant.

I see.

We have our phones,
if you need anything.

Oh, of course.

He'll be fine.

Because we're right downstairs.
And we have our phones.

Of course, you kids have fun.

You sure now?

Just call 911-

Goodbye, I know.

Where to begin?

You've selected
Bikini beach disaster

for $32.99. To have it charged
to your room, press enter.

Have it play on all three TV's,
for the discounted price of

$98.95

press star.

What a deal!

Don't tell me I don't know
about my financial future.

Isn't this nice, giving
the boys some time alone?

Well, let's admit it.
They were annoying us too.

What's that stomach?

Oh, room service!

Don't mind if I do.

Are you ready to order?

Honey, you go first.

All right, fine.

I'll have the
spaghetti carbonara.

That sounds good,

maybe I'll just have
a bite of yours.

Uh-huh, you always do this.

You eat half of
mine, and I'm hungry.

Fine! I'll
have the lobster.

She means half a lobster.

She means
the whole lobster.

You know, you're not going
to finish it. We'll share.

I don't want to
share. I want my own.

Fine! We'll both have lobster.

You're paying for two lobsters.

Mh hmm.

You're getting a spite lobster?

Worth every penny.

Okay, I'm gonna say it.

This song sucks,
it's literally sucked

all the joy out of me
and saliva! I need water.

What are you doing?

Having a drink of water.

Yeah, my water!
Your song, my water!

You got Mandy all
wet, apologize!

Sorry, Mandy.

Not to her, to me!

I'm not gonna apologize to you!

You've been a jerk
to me all day!

I'm not a jerk, I'm demanding

because we need to
do the song right.

You don't even seem to like it!

Of course I don't like it.

But my dad says
it'll make us win.

Your dad? This is
supposed to be our song!

Fine! You wanna pick a song?

Go ahead, you pick a song!

What about that stupid song,

you're always trying
on stupid Mandy!

Oh, so you think
my song is stupid!?

Oh, I don't know, I haven't
heard the whole stupid thing!

Still think it's stupid?

Keep going.

(guitar chords continue playing

Lobster.

Since. When did your
hands get so loud?

Well, maybe your
hearing just got better.

Oh, so this is my fault?

Uh-uh but I'll tell
you what is your fault,

you're breathing.

Now you want me
to stop breathing?

Well, not all the time.

Hey, don't be mad.

Ooh, we're
getting lobster.

I'm sorry. Somebody just ordered

the remaining lobsters
for room service.

Didn't think you'd
be this fresh.

So how do I eat you?

Lets see. Place live
lobsters into boiling water.

What kind of a monster
do you think I am?

Don't worry, I won't
do you like that.

Noah, that was amazing.

Really? You think so?

Dude, I loved it! Could
you send it to me?

Yeah, I'll send it to you later.

Why don't we just
sing that song?

It's complicated.

No, it's not. Your song is fire.

The other song is
a dumpster fire.

Dude, my dad wrote
that other song.

Wait, wait. This
song really suits you

way more than your dad's.

Thanks, my dad hates it.

He hates everything
that I write.

He says he knows what's
best for my career.

Whatever. Let's
just get back to it.

Wait, wait, wait.
Is this how it goes?

What I tell you about
playing that song?

Come on, your mother is waiting.

Good morning sunshine!

Where's all this
sunshine coming from?

Well, I got us the
perfect gift for couples

who don't want to
spend time together.

We can spend time together
apart, in isolation tanks.

You mean those little
pods at the spa,

where you float around in
salt water all by yourself?

Mh-hmm. I mean army tanks.

I'm just playing.

Thank you baby.

Time apart from you,

is the most thoughtful
gift you've ever gotten me.

I know the drill.
You're just downstairs.

You have your phones.

You know, go and enjoy your
isolation you crazy kids.

All right.

Bye.

Willy, Leftie, papa's coming.

He spent all night
pushing and pushing

and pushing me to sing his song!

"You'll never win
singing your garbage."

Okay I'm sorry I gave
you such a hard time

about you dad's song.

Thanks. You know
between me and you,

I never even wanted
to enter this thing.

Wow.

Let's just do my
dad's stupid song.

Should we freshen
your sea water?

Jaxon!

The crabs are back!

Jax!

Hey love birds.

Jaxon, how has your
alone time been?

Great! I've been super alone,

no other people or
animals here at all.

Okay. Well I'm gonna
have a nice relaxing bath

before the show.

Go ahead baby.

Why don't you use your tub?

Because ours isn't
working right now.

Let me go run the water for you!

What? Where'd you guys go?

Leftie.

Leftie, Willy?

Oh no, no, no, no, no.

I'm coming. Jaxon!

Let's hear it for Maya and Ivy.

Uh you're gonna fly?

Great job Maya and Ivy. Next up,

Noah and Calvin with
a unique love song.

Ugh.

Know what?

Let's do this.

Yes.

What's he doing?

I don't know, I told him
exactly what song to sing.

Wow! It looks like we might
have saved the best for last!

And you two are
about to find out,

because you're getting
judged first. Judges?

Boys, this was the
perfect song for you two.

Calvin, I love how you knew to
just sit back in the pocket,

and let the song
come to you and Noah,

you're in the zone I've
never seen you in before.

Yeah, the tingles zone!

It was like we were watching
the birth of a new Noah.

Wow, how do you
guys feel right now?

Great.

I quit.

Wait, are you serious?

Dude?

Can someone
please explain to me

what is happening right now?

Noah, my man, I'm not sure
where this is coming from

but you have proved tonight

that you have the skills
to go all the way.

I appreciate that but

working with Calvin
has helped me realize

that life's too
short to waste time

signing songs you don't love or,

living someone else's dream.

I'm sorry man. But thank you.

No man, respect.

So, is this going to
affect my score in any way?

Hey Cal, come take
your victory plate,

I'm glad you're still in it bud.

Thanks dad.

All right.

Leftie?

Willy?

Leftie?

Come here baby.

Thanks man, you enjoy
those, you earned them.

And besides, they don't taste
as good if I don't take them.

You know when I was your age,

you
only had one fork,

and you took turns
eating one green bean.

Uh-uh. MOM: hm-mhh.

I love the way your mom
snorkes when she laughs.

She has the cutest noises.

DJ Jax.

I'm gonna call it a night.

Okay, okay.
Goodnight, goodnight.

Why is there $1000
charge for room service?

What? Uh-oh