01x02 - Snag It

[bunniefuu]

♪ [SOFT
INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING] ♪

[ECHOING MUFFLED CHATTER]

[MUFFLED CHATTER CONTINUES]

- ♪ [MUSIC CUTS OFF] ♪
- [DOOR SLAMMING SHUT]

[KEYS JINGLING]

The... There were events
that, uh, began at,

um...

After the cyclone
where Floyd and I met,

about a week after the cyclone,
would...

Floyd and I had, uh, bonded.

Uh, he threw
a cornhole celebration.

You know where the Jamba Juice
is on Center Street?

Uh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, that's, uh...
It's right near the station.

That's right near my office.

It's right
behind the Jamba Juice,

Purina Corporate.

- Cool.
- [CHUCKLING] Yeah. Um...

You know, that...
That's my Jamba Juice, too.

Central.

Okay. Well, wow, me too.

- Uh, I'm in there all the time.
- [CHUCKLES]

Like, uh, the...

The Go Getter is my energy lift,
you know?

It used to be coffee,
but I was drinking,

like, way, you know...
It was like,

"Hang on here, what?"

- You know?
- [LAUGHS]

- Yeah.
- [CHUCKLES] Nice.

Yeah, Go Getter.
It's me too. Wow. Okay.

- CLARK FORREST: Is that right?
- Yeah.

It's the healthiest one,
more or less. Don't you think?

Floyd gets
the PB Chocolate Love.

Oh! PB Chocolate Love.

- That's nice.
- Yeah. I mean,

- it's pretty much a milkshake.
- [CLARK CHUCKLES]

[BOTH CHUCKLE]

Uh, what about the girls?
What do they like to do?

Oh, well, let's see. Lately,
they're into, uh, crafting.

- Hmm.
- EIMY FORREST: Um, dance.

Ooh, dance.
You guys have a dance school?

No, we just... we just
started looking, actually.

Dance with Miss Ashley
Dance Academy on Campbell.

- EIMY: Yeah, that's a good one, huh?
- Good? No, it's great.

We signed Richard up there
for the... He, you know,

he has some things.

He doesn't like sports...

- EIMY: Oh, okay.
- so we've had to

- try some other things.
- EIMY: Yeah.

Hey, hey! Hey, Richard!

Show Eimy
some of your dance moves.

I don't have any dance moves.

FLOYD SMERNITCH:
[CHUCKLES] Yeah, that's right.

- [CHUCKLES]
- FLOYD: Okay, right answer.

Awesome.

[WHISPERING] Does he...
He hasn't learned anything yet?

- Or he's just being bad, or...
- No, that's what I'm saying.

We bought, like, a three-month
dance pack, and then he didn't even go.

- Like, not even once.
- EIMY: Oh.

But I didn't want it
to be a thing where

he felt like
he had disappointed us

because we paid all that money,
so I went.

- Oh.
- FLOYD: I'm a... I sign.

- EIMY: Oh.
- I do the big stage

at the 314 Fest every summer.

The big, like,
R&B, hip-hop stage.

And, you know, they just want me

to sign the lyrics,
but I... I wanted

to give the deaf audience,
like, a richer experience.

- EIMY: Oh.
- So I wanted to link the lyrics

to, like, a rhythm and groove.

And I got, you know,
really into it. [CHUCKLES]

- EIMY: Wow.
- And then I renewed the pack.

- Oh, f... for you?
- f*ck yeah.

[CHUCKLES] Wow.

So, you do the weather?

Yeah, I do. Yeah, yeah.

Clark Forrest.
My favorite, actually.

Total favorite.

Thank you so much.

- That's, uh...
- Total favorite local weather.

Channel 10.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

That's very, uh, um...

I, uh...

You know, I do...
It's not the only...

[SIGHS]

I have a... I have a deep-sea
demolition company

- off the coast of Canada...
- ♪ [SOFT MUSIC PLAYING] ♪

- Wow. Wow.
- that I founded.

And I... And I still...

I go...

I oversee and I engineer,
uh, the... the... the big demo.

Um...

So, yeah, I, uh...

I do that. Um... [SIGHS]

- I...
- What?

I'm the...

They call me, uh,

the Bang Master, actually.

Hmm.

Or Big Bang, sometimes. Uh...

So, anyway, I'm up there.
I'm doing that.

I'm overseeing, you know,
really the whole, you know,

f*cking company.
Everything dangerous.

So I, you know,
I do that in addition to,

uh, the weather.

You know, I gotta
mix it up a little bit.

- Wow.
- CLARK: Yeah.

Okay.

Bang Master.

The Big Bang.

♪ ["LET THE SUNSHINE IN" BY
THE 5TH DIMENSION PLAYING] ♪

♪ Let the sunshine ♪

♪ Let the sunshine in ♪

♪ The sunshine in ♪

♪ Let the sunshine ♪

- ♪ Oh, let it shine ♪
- ♪ Let the sunshine in ♪

- ♪ Come on ♪
- ♪ The sunshine in ♪

♪ Now everybody
Just sing along ♪

♪ Let the sunshine ♪

- ♪ And let the sunshine on in ♪
- ♪ Let the sunshine in ♪

- ♪ Open up your heart ♪
- ♪ The sunshine in ♪

♪ And let it shine on in ♪

- ♪ And when you are lonely ♪
- ♪ Let the sunshine ♪

- ♪ Hey! Let it shine ♪
- ♪ Let the sunshine in ♪

♪ You gotta open up your heart And
let it shine on in ♪ - ♪ The sunshine in ♪

♪ And when you feel
Like you've been mistreated ♪

♪ Let the sunshine ♪

♪ And your friends
Turn their back upon ya ♪

- ♪ Let the sunshine in ♪
- ♪ Just open up your heart ♪

- ♪ The sunshine in ♪
- ♪ Let it shine on in ♪

- ♪ You got to feel it ♪
- ♪ Let the sunshine ♪

- ♪ You got to feel it ♪
- ♪ Let the sunshine ♪

♪ Open up your heart And let it
shine on in ♪ - ♪ The sunshine in ♪

- ♪ You got to feel it ♪
- ♪ Let the sunshine ♪

- ♪ You got to feel it ♪
- ♪ Let the sunshine in ♪

- ♪ When you open up your heart ♪
- ♪ The sunshine in ♪

♪ You got to let
The sun come in ♪

♪ [SONG FADES] ♪

♪ ["LIP GLOSS" BY LIL MAMA
PLAYING] ♪ - MISS ASHLEY: Three, four.

- Right, left.
- ♪ Yeah... ♪

MISS ASHLEY:
Right, left. Two, three.

Crisscross.

Clap your hands. Good job!

Jump. Jump.

Two, three. To the right.

To the left.

Now we go around the world.

Oh, here we go!

♪ Whatchu Whatchu know 'bout
me? ♪ - [MISS ASHLEY CHEERING]

♪ Whatchu know 'bout me?
Whatchu, whatchu know? ♪

♪ They say my lip gloss is cool
My lip gloss be poppin' ♪

♪ I'm standin' at my locker
And all the boys keep stoppin' ♪

♪ Whatchu know 'bout me? ♪

♪ Whatchu
Whatchu know 'bout me? ♪

♪ Whatchu know 'bout me?
Whatchu, whatchu know? ♪

♪ They say my lip gloss is cool
My lip gloss be poppin' ♪

♪ I'm standin' at my locker
And all the boys keep stoppin' ♪

MISS ASHLEY: Come on. Oh!

♪ Whatchu know 'bout me?
Whatchu, whatchu know? ♪

♪ They say
My lip gloss is poppin' ♪

♪ My lip gloss is cool ♪

♪ All the boys keep jockin'
They chase me after school ♪

MISS ASHLEY:
Beginner hip-hop, five minutes.

What class are you in?

- Uh, intermediate hip-hop.
- CLARK: All right.

Yeah, it's a good workout.

You know,
I'm trying to lose a few.

Well, it's good
for the heart rate.

It's good for my curve, too.

- For your what?
- Uh, Peyronie's.

- Oh, yeah.
- Yeah.

Usually caused by trauma.
Blunt trauma.

Mine was.

What... What ha...

[QUIETLY] What happened?

Do you mind me asking?

No, I'll tell you.

Um...

[SIGHS]

I went on this job interview
in Chicago.

I had an interview
to maybe start equity trading.

♪ [SOFT PIANO MUSIC PLAYING] ♪

{\an1}FLOYD: Carol's idea.
It was a good idea.

- [SIGHS]
- You look great.

FLOYD:
I was selling printer toner,

which nobody
was really buying anymore.

[SOFTLY] Okay.

♪ [FUNKY MUSIC PLAYING] ♪ -
FLOYD: The Chicago job would have been

pretty good money,
like a big deal for the family.

So, I headed downtown
for this thing.

She made me
get there really early.

So I'd be early.

And so, I'm there
crossing LaSalle, busy street,

sun's coming up,
and I witnessed this thing.

- [YELLS]
- [CARN HORN HONKING]

FLOYD: This kid is
in the middle of, like,

- five lanes, six lanes. I don't know.
- Hey, hey, hey! Yeah!

FLOYD: Walking back and forth.
He has mental health issues.

And there he is.

Like, that's where he wants
to be, like, in that danger.

- [LAUGHS]
- FLOYD: Whiz, man.

Like, cars just, like,
flying right next to him. Whiz!

Like,
he's almost getting k*lled,

but he keeps smiling
and, like, spinning around,

almost dying the whole time.

- CLARK: You... So, what, like...?
- [TIRES SQUEALING]

- FLOYD: So, I... I go get him.
- [CAR HORNS HONKING]

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

FLOYD: And I get him.

And I get him
into a firm embrace.

[TIRES SCREECHING]

FLOYD: And then we, like,
Frogger back over to safety.

We made it. We made it.

And then, uh, what happened?

Did you get hit
in the p*nis by a car?

No, no. I got on the news.

I'm here with Floyd Smernitch,
who just hours ago

risked his life to save
a troubled young man

from real danger
on LaSalle this morning.

Floyd, do you
consider yourself a hero?

You... Uh, I...
No, I don't think that's...

Uh, I don't think
that's important.

I think...
I think what's important...

- So, I bolt across this busy downtown street...
- Yeah.

'cause I'm late, and Carol
really wants to get this job.

Yeah. [STAMMERS] But tell me
what happened with the, um...

MISS ASHLEY:
Okay, beginner hip-hop.

- FLOYD: Oh, that happened later.
- CLARK: Yeah?

Yeah. [LOUDLY] Hey!
Hey, first day?

- ANABEL FORREST: Yeah.
- Yeah. Are you excited?

All right, cool.

Well, I want you
to have a good time

and, you know, dance your best.

But remember,
you don't have to dance better

- than anybody else...
- That's right.

because it's not a sport.
It's a form of expression.

[CLARK CHUCKLES]

♪ ["TIME'S UP BY CHERELE PLAYING]
♪ - MISS ASHLEY: And here we go!

And feel it.

Yes! Looking great!

- All right!
- Hey, Clark, can I get a jump?

- Uh, yes.
- A jump?

MISS ASHLEY: Whoo!
All right. Looking good!

Yeah, sorry, man.

Yeah, this car is, uh,


but I guess
that means she's old.

- Hey, sweetheart.
- Hey.

Uh, yeah, it's dead. Way.

So, I'm gonna
have to get it towed.

I gotta wait till
my next paycheck, I guess.

- Okay.
- FLOYD: I'm just gonna go

and tell, uh, Miss Ashley

that we're gonna abandon
the car here, for a little bit.

Okay.

♪ [SOFT
INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING] ♪

Tried to get her going again
with my jumpers.

You could probably just touch it
with your hand.

It would probably
just start right up.

- [DOOR OPENING]
- FLOYD: She's cool with it!

[DOOR CLOSING]

Okay.

♪ [MUSIC CONCLUDES] ♪

- FLOYD: She's cool with it.
- CAROL LOVE-SMERNITCH: Okay.

- Later, man!
- CLARK: Later, man.

[FLOYD SIGHS]

[GRUNTS] Oh, hey. Thank you.

CAROL: One-car household.

[BIRDS CHIRPING]

I mean, even if I wasn't taking
the R&B dance class,

we still wouldn't have enough
for another good car,

just so you know.

I don't want you to blame it
on the R&B dance lessons.

Okay.

- [SIGHS] It's weird.
- What?

[SIGHS] Taking the bus.

You're not taking the bus.
I'm taking the bus.

You're taking the one car

because I work on the street,
the bus goes down,

and you work in weird,
faraway places.

I don't even know why you're

still sitting here
at the bus stop.

You have to take
Richard to school.

I wanted to say that it's weird
that you're taking the bus

while I'm taking the car.

I wanted to say that
before I got in the car.

- Okay, thank you.
- Okay.

- I love you.
- I love you too.

Okay.

[BIRDS CHIRPING]

[SIGHS]

[CAR DOOR OPENS]

[CAR DOOR CLOSES]

[CAR ENGINE STARTS]

- [BRAKES SCREECH]
- [ENGINE RUMBLING]

- FLOYD: [MUFFLED] I love you.
- What?

FLOYD: I love you.

I love you.

Okay, I can't hear...

I can't hear you
over our one car.

What are you saying?

[ENGINE STOPS]

- I love you.
- I love you too.

- Okay, bye, see ya.
- CAROL: See ya.

- [ENGINE SPUTTERING]
- [SIGHS]

FLOYD: f*ck.

Come on, come on.

[ENGINE SPUTTERS, STARTS]

[SOFTLY] Oh, nice. Okay.

- All right, see you.
- Bye.

[CHUCKLES SOFTLY] Okay.

♪ [PENSIVE MUSIC PLAYING] ♪

♪ [PENSIVE MUSIC CONTINUES] ♪

♪ [MUSIC TURNS INTRIGUING] ♪

- ♪ [MUSIC FADES] ♪
- [QUIET CHATTER]

CLARK: Hi.

Go Getter?

Yeah.
My every day. Go Getter.

For sure, yeah.

Same.

Usually take a midday break,
get the energy up.

I hear ya. [CHUCKLES]

What is "bunting"?

For the batter?

The... It says "bunting"
in this little book

that they gave me,

but it's like I should already
know what bunting is.

- CLARK: Okay.
- I don't know what it is.

- CLARK: Yeah, it's...
- Bunting.

Yeah... [STUTTERS]

- I'm gonna explain it to you.
- Oh.

Whenever I ask Floyd
anything about ump stuff,

he's like... he acts
like I'm not even talking.

- Mm-hmm. Have you...
- [CELL PHONE BUZZING]

Have you always been
in love with umpiring?

I've never been
in love with umpiring,

even now when I'm doing it.
[CHUCKLES]

But it's 85 a game,

and it's right
behind the house, so...

[CELL PHONE BUZZING]

CAROL: Hmm, you're blowing up.

It's a demo call.

Uh, that's for demolition.

Sorry.
Uh, the... the guys, they're...

They got
a big job today. They're...

They get nervous
and kind of puss out.

And they got to call
someone who's,

you know, done it
a bunch of times, you know?

♪ [INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING] ♪

They p*ssy out.

What's that?

They p*ssy out
and they call you?

So, I don't know
anything about ump stuff.

Maybe I should go to like
a Cardinals game, yeah?

But that's pricey.
[BREATHES DEEPLY]

And I probably don't even
understand what's going on

in a Cardinals game. [CHUCKLES]

You know, uh,
we get group tickets.

- Yeah?
- Yeah, at WTGK.

Um, we get...
We get 'em in block, and

maybe you could join
one of those?

Yeah, I mean, that would...
I would like to join, yeah.

Like when?

There's, um,
a schedule of games.

That information is on here.

Like, look. Thursday?

Can you do it Thursday?

And then I could maybe
join that block?

- Let me check my work schedule.
- Oh, come on.

Don't p*ssy out.

♪ [ORGAN MUSIC
PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS] ♪

[CROWD CHEERING]

Why is he walking out
to the pitcher?

Uh, to talk to the pitcher.

Here you go.
Just pass that one down there.

- About what?
- Uh, probably about pitching.

- Oh.
- You know?

I know. I'm just having fun.
Nope, that's yours.

Snag it.

- [INDISTINCT CHATTER]
- ♪ [INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING] ♪

That's the light beer. Snag it.

Snag that one?

Yeah. It's yours.

Snag it.

Is there a limit to how many
timeouts they can get?

Uh, not... No.
I don't think so. The...

Baseball is one of those games
that, uh, doesn't have a clock.

Interesting.

- [SOFTLY] Yeah.
- Interesting.

Cheers.

Do you wanna pass this one?

Ah, yeah.

Here you go, one more.

You should come
to Strohmeyer on Saturday

and see my game.

Watch my big league moves.
[CHUCKLES]

- Oh, yeah?
- Mm-hmm.

It'd be great to see Floyd.

Oh, well, he's actually
not gonna be there

'cause he's gonna be
downstate at his mom's.

- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.

- At Saturday?
- 2:00 p.m.

Hmm.

I bike ride, uh, at Strohmeyer.

In the afternoons,

uh, on Saturdays, so...

- Cool.
- Yeah.

'Cause that's
when I'll be there. So...

Saturday in the afternoon.

And, uh,
Floyd will be downstate.

♪ [MUSIC CONTINUES] ♪

♪ [I WISH IT WOULD RAIN”
BY THE TEMPTATIONS PLAYING] ♪

CAROL: Play ball!

[CROWD CHEERING]

Strike three!

♪ Sunshine, blue skies
Please go away ♪

♪ My girl has found another
And gone away ♪

♪ With her went my future
My life is filled with gloom ♪

♪ So day after day
I stay locked up in my room ♪

♪ I know to you
It might sound strange ♪

♪ But I wish it would rain ♪ - ♪
Oh, how I wish That it would rain ♪

♪ Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Rain ♪ - ♪ How I
wish That it would rain ♪

♪ [LEAD SINGER VOCALIZING] ♪

♪ Let it rain ♪

- ♪ Let it rain ♪
- ♪ Let it rain ♪

♪ I need rain to disguise
The tears in my eyes ♪

♪ Oh, let it rain ♪

♪ Oh, yeah, yeah, listen ♪

♪ I'm a man and I got my pride ♪

♪ Let it rain ♪

♪ [SONG FADES] ♪

Wednesday afternoon, I could.

- CAROL: I could, too.
- Yeah?

At the Quality Garden Suites?

CAROL: It's gonna be
a long week till then.

Listen.

Can I tell you something?

You can do anything with me.

You never have to have any fears
about sharing anything with me.

At the Quality Garden Suites,
or wherever we are.

I want your dreams.

♪ [SOFT MUSIC PLAYING] ♪

You want my dreams?

At the Quality Garden Suites?

CAROL: Give me your dreams.

Tell me.

I would like...

[WHISPERING]
I would like for you

to sit on my face.

Um...

Yeah?

And just go about your business.

You know,
do tasks on your phone.

Just...

Just while you sit on my face.

♪ [MUSIC FADES] ♪

[CLARK GROANS]

CAROL: Yeah,
it's 9-7-9-2,



AGENT: That'll be
the second attempt at delivery.

- CAROL: Uh-huh.
- [CLARK CHOKES]

CAROL: Okay,
well, it says here.

- AGENT: Hold.
- CAROL: What?

[CLARK WHEEZING] -CAROL:
[SIGHS] FedEx put me on hold,

- and it's their fault.
- [CLARK CHOKING]

♪ [HOLD MUSIC PLAYING
OVER CELL PHONE] ♪

[GROANS]

- [SIGHS]
- [CLARK WHEEZING]

DONOGHUE HOMER:
So you would, uh...

You would meet more regularly
at the Quality Garden Suites?

Hmm?

Yeah. Our dream meetings, yeah.

HOMER: What's a dream meeting?

Well, that's, uh,
when we'd just meet

and, um, make each other's
dream come true.

Sexually.

Make all our dreams come true.

At the Quality Garden Suites.

Yeah.

Mm. That's the one
in the suburbs, right?

Yeah.

And that's where
your dreams came true?

- CLARK: Yeah.
- Yeah.

Like?

♪ [TENSE MUSIC PLAYING] ♪

Like what?

Like, what's one of your dreams?

Um...

[SIGHS]

Like

weight.

Weight placement.

Weight placement?

CLARK: Like someone

places their weight on you

on your

on you.

Oh.

[CLARK GROANS]

[PANTING] So good.

So good.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

[SIGHS]

So, when are you going to have
Smernitch's computer stuff?

- Hour, hour and a half.
- Oh. Okay,

Um...

Forrest is in custody.
[CLEARS THROAT]

- Yeah, nice arrest.
- What's that?

It was a nice arrest.

Okay.

Substantive evidence.

He's at the scene.
We've got motive.

And now that he's in holding,
uh, we'll get more.

That's usually how it,
like, goes down, you know?

- [CLEARS THROAT]
- Okay.

Okay.

No one jacks off to magazines
in modern society.

Well, this guy did.
I'm gonna interview Forrest.

And I want you
to interview the wife. Please.

See, you want
to interview both subjects

of a problematic affair
at the same time

so they don't have time
to get their story straight,

if they're gonna
tell you a story.

Yes, I knew that.

I can interview him.
You can interview her.

You interview her,
I'll interview him.

- I'd like to interview him.
- I'd like you to interview her.

- Why?
- She's not a suspect. I'm lead.

You are to understand that.
He's under arrest.

I just...
I need her version of it

so I'll know when he's lying.
Now, go interview her,

please, Twyla.

♪ [BROODING MUSIC PLAYING] ♪

♪ [MUSIC FADES] ♪

Did Floyd Smernitch have
a life insurance policy?

No way, Jose.

- Mrs. Smernitch, where...
- Love-Smernitch.

There's a thing. Love-Smernitch.

Mrs. Love-Smernitch.

Where did you
first meet Clark Forrest?

Uh, cornhole.

There was a cornhole
get-together on our lawn.

That's when you
and Clark Forrest

began your relationship?

No, that's when
I met Clark Forrest.

And he told me that he owned

and operated
or founded, whatever,

a company that did
deep sea explosions in Canada.

- Clark Forrest told you this?
- Yeah, that's what I just said.

And this wasn't true?

I found out later.
No, that was untrue.

JODIE PLUMB
None of that was true?

No.

JODIE: But at the time,
did you believe him?

I had no reason
to think he was lying.

Can you speak up, please?

And what effect did this
have on you

when you were told that

Mr. Forrest oversaw
underwater explosions

and that sort of thing?

Yeah, I was
interested and curious,

you know,
about his expl*si*n work. Yeah.

And what did you talk
to Mr. Forrest about?

I talked about my son,
and about work,

and, uh, Jamba Juice, and,

and my husband,
that's about all.

I mean, I didn't think
that the ordinary matters

of my life
would be very intriguing,

really, to anybody.

They're samey
as anyone else, so...

I don't really talk a lot,
so I didn't say very much.

So, is it fair to say
that this relationship,

it was instigated
by Clark Forrest?

Can you speak up?

[RAISES VOICE] He was trying
to seduce you, or in that manner?

He was behaving in that manner?

He was behaving
in that manner, yes.

Explosions, I mean.

Yeah. Right? Come on.

And when did you see
Mr. Forrest next?

Jamba Juice.

JODIE: So, you were
at the same Jamba Juice.

You bump into Mr. Forrest.

- Yeah.
- Who was there first?

I remember, um...

I saw Mr. Forrest
at the counter

barstool situation,
when I entered.

So, he was there.

- Then you came in.
- Yes.

And we ordered the same thing.

- The same Jamba Juice.
- CAROL: Mm-hmm.

Jamba Juice
makes different combinations

of juices, yeah.

And, uh, Mr. Forrest
and I ordered the same one,

which was the Go Getter.

You know, so we had
a little laugh about that.

You had a laugh.

Yeah.

So, cornhole, Jamba Juice,

another few encounters,

and then a brief intimacy began.

Yes, and then it ended.

Had you ever discussed
leaving your husband?

- Discussed with Clark?
- Yes.

- Yes, many times. Many times.
- Discussed in what way?

CAROL: Discussed in the way
where I said many times to him

that I had no interest
in leaving my husband

and that I would never do that.

That's all.

Thank you.

Okay.

I have a warrant
to take the mail

that you received this week
into evidence.

- That's again?
- That again what?

CAROL: You're doing that again?

We're doing that each week.

For a duration.
All will be returned to you.

Your bills and files
are kept where?

- CAROL: In the hutch.
- The hutch?

Yeah, we don't have
an office-type situation

in this house, so

we maintain
all the paperwork in a hutch.

Wow.

"Wow"?

Wow with all the questions
and stuff and sh*t, okay?

[SIGHING] I'm sorry. Sorry.

- It's okay.
- You know, it's just been

a lot.

Of course.

May I see the hutch?

Sure.

♪ [INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING] ♪

This contains tax matters?

Of your family's?

This box?

CAROL: That's Floyd's stuff.

I'd like to take this
for assessment too, ma'am.

So, she makes your dreams
come true, Carol Smernitch.

She makes your dreams
come true, Clark.

And then she tells you,

after all that, she's still
in love with her husband.

Hmm?

Isn't that what happens
to you next?

♪ ["NAILS, HAIR, HIPS, HEELS"
BY TODRICK HALL PLAYING] ♪

[AUDIENCE CHEERING]

♪ Nails, hair, hips, heels
Face done, lips real ♪

♪ Purse full, big bills
Yes, I'm a big deal... ♪

It was really nice of Floyd
to get us all tickets.

Yeah, totally.

TODRICK HALL: ♪ You, me,
you wish New phone, who this? ♪

EIMY: Do you guys want a water?

Oh, I would love one.

- Do you want water?
- No, thank you.

- No? Okay.
- Thank you. Thank you.

TODRICK: ♪ Girl, what did
That girl just say, girl? ♪

♪ Ooh, girl, I don't dance
I work ♪

♪ I don't play, I slay ♪

♪ I don't walk
I strut, strut, strut ♪

♪ And then sashay ♪

♪ But I don't work for free ♪

♪ That's not the tea, hunty ♪

♪ So make it rain on me ♪

♪ And I might let you see ♪ - VOCALISTS: ♪ What you Gonna let them see? ♪

TODRICK:
♪ My nails, hair, hips, heels ♪

♪ Nails, hair, hips
Heels, nails... ♪

He's just...

[AUDIENCE CHEERING]

TODRICK: ♪ Okay, dolls, y'all
know What time it is, come on... ♪

- You okay?
- Look at him.

TODRICK:
♪ Everybody on the floor... ♪

- Floyd?
- TODRICK: ♪ Stretch out those legs ♪

♪ Stretch out that wrist
Stretch out that weave... ♪

He is trying so hard.

TODRICK: ♪ I want
To see you work, come on ♪

♪ Drop for me
Drop for me, drop ♪

♪ Drop for me
Drop for me, drop ♪

♪ Drop for me, drop for me... ♪

Yeah, he... you...
He's pretty good.

You wouldn't think
that a guy, like, that big,

uh, or that an overweight guy
would be great at fluttering.

CAROL: He's athletic.

You know, I mean, I'm worried
about his weight a little bit,

but we're working on it.

TODRICK: ♪ Blink for me
Blink for me, go ♪

♪ Blink for me
Blink for me, go... ♪

God, I hope his heart
doesn't just burst up there.

TODRICK:
♪ Twirl for me, twirl ♪

♪ Twirl for me
Twirl for me, twirl... ♪

CAROL: Look at him.

Man, look at him go.

[LAUGHS]

TODRICK: ♪ Say girl for me
Girl for me, girl... ♪

Are you okay?

TODRICK: ♪ Say girl for me
Girl for me ♪

♪ Now snap for me
Snap for me, snap... ♪

Clark, I love him so much.

{\an1}TODRICK: ♪ Snap for me
Snap for me, snap ♪

♪ Snap for me
Snap for me, snap... ♪

I just want to be old with him.

You know, look at him.
He is the sweetest thing.

I mean, in my mind,
I was kind of making fun

of this whole
R&B deaf thing, but

look at him go.

TODRICK:
♪ Shade for me, shade ♪

♪ Shade for me
Shade for me, shade ♪

♪ Throw shade for me
Shade for me, shade ♪

♪ Shade for me
Shade for me, shade ♪

♪ Now blam for me
Shablam for me, shablam ♪

♪ Shablam for me
Shablam for me, shablam ♪

♪ Shablam for me
Shablam for me, shablam ♪

♪ Shablam for me
Shablam for me, shablam ♪

♪ That's all ♪

[AUDIENCE CHEERING,
APPLAUDING]

Whoo! You go, girl!

♪ [TENSE MUSIC PLAYING] ♪

HOMER: She tells you that,
after all that,

she's still in love
with her husband.

I have your texts.

And then

then you befriend him,
the husband.

I mean, really befriend him.

No?

I get that timeline wrong?

Because that's when you two,
you and Floyd Smernitch,

that's when
[BREATHES DEEPLY]

That's when
you got closer to him.

- That's right.
- Yeah, yeah.

So you could gain
his trust. Yeah.

Maybe deal with him.

Get rid of him.
Get some kind of plan.

I don't know what kind.

But you get some kind of a plan.

[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

♪ [MUSIC CONCLUDES] ♪

HOMER:
So, what is DTF St. Louis?

DAVE: It's a subscription
the victim had.

It's a dating site, hookup site.

- We subpoenaed them.
- Hookup?

DAVE: Yeah. It's like
a sexual encounter site.

Uh-huh. So, what's in here?

He was arranging meetings.
With men.

Yeah, right
Well, Daddy's little secret.

He was really into,
uh, Indiana Jones.

I don't know, it was his thing,
personal. [CHUCKLES]

He, uh, met with this guy.

Uh, to do it?

[QUIETLY]
I mean, "it" like in f*cking?

What? Do they meet to f*ck?

- Yeah, it's like a sex site.
- Oh.

- Okay.
- DAVE: Yep. For married people

to hook up and like, uh...

Yeah, in private places.

- HOMER: Around St. Louis?
- Around St. Louis, yeah.

He met this guy,
but here's the thing.

Weeks later, he meets up
with this guy.

- Tiger Tiger.
- DAVE: Yes.

This is Tiger Tiger here?

Yes, it's the profile
for this younger guy.

Tiger Tiger says, "Meet me
at the Kevin Kline pools."

HOMER: Oh, wow.
That's where he was k*lled.

- The morning of?
- DAVE: 4:00 a.m.

The morning
we discovered the body.

Okay, did you, uh,
subpoena this profile,

- uh, man, this young guy?
- Yes, but he's not a young guy.

He was just posing
as a young guy.

HOMER: Hmm.

DAVE: It's Clark Forrest.

♪ [SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING] ♪

The weather guy?

Clark Forrest is Tiger Tiger.

♪ [SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC
CONTINUES] ♪

You doing okay?

Yeah.

You wanna take a break
or something there, Tiger?

Huh? Wanna take five, Tiger?

Why do you keep
calling me Tiger?

Because you're Tiger Tiger.

Yeah.

You created this profile.

DTF St. Louis,
Tiger Tiger, your IP address.

They have to tell us
when they're subpoenaed.

Smernitch

he liked to meet men
on this site.

- You posed as a man.
- Floyd didn't like to meet men.

You don't know
what you're talking about.

♪ [MUSIC CONCLUDES] ♪

- HOMER: This is a guy, right?
- DAVE: Yes.

His name
is Christopher Robert Spurce.

Lives in Twyla.
Small business owner.

And he had a sex date
with Floyd Smernitch?

DAVE: Yes.

HOMER: Get him in here.

[RAPID FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]

HOMER: Modern Love?

Yes.

HOMER: So, you met
this Rocksolid for breakfast?

Yeah. Ordinary breakfast.

Ordinary guy. Nice guy.

Did breakfast lead to any,
uh, intimacy or sex?

Breakfast led to

- a little intimacy play and...
- HOMER: Little... A little what?

CHRISTOPHER ROBERT SPRUCE:
[LOUDER] A little intimacy play.

What's that?

CHRISTOPHER: Uh, well, it could
be any number of things,

but in this case, it was just
making out in the parking lot.

- HOMER: Oh, you kissed?
- Yeah.

Kissing of what sort?

Oh, like the kind
where I put my tongue

in his mouth, kissing.

HOMER: Hmm.

Uh, was
there any additional...? Hmm?

a*s play.

Okay.

Who played with whose a*s?

I touched his a*s a little bit.

And that led
to some brief grinding.

Hey, Forrest.

You wanted this guy gone.

He liked to meet men.

You introduced him
to DTF St. Louis.

You're buddies now.
He goes on this site.

He goes... he goes
to meet Tiger Tiger.

But that's you, though.
Gets dead instead.

Clark.

You get the girl.

That's what happened. Yeah?

Clear as day.

What, you afraid
to talk to me now?

- I'm not.
- HOMER: Not what?

- Not Tiger Tiger?
- I'm not afraid.

- You're Tiger Tiger.
- I'm Tiger Tiger.

- [SOFTLY] f*ck.
- ♪ [TENSE MUSIC PLAYING] ♪

But...

But what?

- [CELL PHONE BUZZES]
- ♪ [TENSE MUSIC CONTINUES] ♪

REPORTER: [ON TV] You'll
find this app under DTF St. Louis.

And while I'm not going
to tell you what DTF stands for,

if you know, then you'll know

that this is targeted
towards married couples

who still might want
to have a little secret fun

with a new face here
in the St. Louis area,

no strings attached.

NEWS ANCHOR:
No strings attached.

All of the excitement,
none of the consequences.

September 14th,
Carol Love-Smernitch to you.

"I love Floyd so much, right?
He's so sweet,

wow, and he needs someone
to take care of him.

And that's me.
And that's what I want to do."

Okay, the next text
on your phone,

you don't respond to her.

You text Floyd soon after,
and your text is...

"Hey, man, we're having
a get-together Sunday.

Can you guys come?"
Floyd, "Cool, we're there."

♪ [TENSE MUSIC CONTINUES] ♪

- [INDISTINCT CHATTER]
- ♪ [TENSE MUSIC CONTINUES] ♪

CLARK: Hey.

Hey. So, I... I...
I saw this thing.

A segment while I was getting
ready for my broadcast.

Okay.

CLARK: It was a report about,
uh, an app.

Dating... dating app.

I mean, it's not really
a dating app, actually, uh...

DTF St. Louis.

What's DTF?

"Down to f*ck."

Down to f*ck?

Someone responds
to your profile,

you set a meeting,
someplace quiet,

then you meet.

FLOYD: I got a hit.
First one says "Modern Love."

- Hey, you got a hit, man!
- I got a hit.

- CLARK: [LAUGHS] Nice one.
- FLOYD: Yeah.

I think he liked my profile.

He definitely
liked your profile.

That's why you got the hit.

- Yeah. And he liked it.
- Yeah.

You know, I think
I want to meet him.

- [DOOR OPENING]
- [SIGHS]

- [DOOR CLOSING]
- ♪ [MUSIC CONCLUDES] ♪

[FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]

Put it on the projector. [SIGHS]

[DOOR OPENING, CLOSING]

So

you posed as Tiger Tiger.

Floyd messages Tiger Tiger

and he makes a plan
to meet for sex.

And he brought some dad porn
to get his game face on.

Daddy's favorite
Indiana Jones jack-off classics.

Then you show instead.

- On your nerd bike.
- [BUTTON CLICKS]

You have a drink together.
Bloody Mary found at the scene.

[BUTTON CLICKS]

HOMER: It's got a massive dose
of Amphezyne in it.

A pharmaceutical amphetamine.

Twenty minutes later, he's dead.

- Hmm.
- [BUTTON CLICKS]

You were prescribed
Amphezyne on November 3rd,

six days before the m*rder.

That's premeditation.

That's m*rder one.

And in the state of Missouri,
which is the state we're in,

that's the death penalty, buddy.

Hmm?

Oh. Well,

now you're afraid to talk.

[FOOTSTEPS ECHOING]

[SIREN WAILING IN DISTANCE]

[BOX THUDS]

♪ [INTRIGUING MUSIC PLAYING] ♪

- [DOORBELL RINGING]
- [FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]

CAROL: Hello? Yes. What?

Is this Floyd Smernitch?

Yeah.

Oh my God, yes.
From when he was young.

♪ [INTRIGUING MUSIC CONTINUES] ♪

- CASHIER: Your name?
- Jodie Plumb.

CASHIER: Thank you.
It'll be right up.

Okay.

Pardon me. Um...

I'm a detective
with the Twyla police.

May I ask you a question?

Sure.

Do you recognize this customer?

Yeah.

That's Watermelon Breeze.

And why do you
call her "Watermelon Breeze"?

She always
gets Watermelon Breeze.

We do that. Tina.

Who's that?

Watermelon Breeze.

Would it be strange
for this woman

to order the Go Getter?

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

Because she's Watermelon Breeze.

Yeah, she's Watermelon Breeze.

CASHIER: There was
that one weird day, though.

♪ [MUSIC FADES] ♪

So this guy was seeing men
on the side,

on this website.

- The victim?
- HOMER: Yeah.

The weatherman poses as a guy.

He lures him
to the Kevin Klines.

And this poor guy, he thinks
he's going there for sex.

He brings his little, uh,
pregame b*ner fuel,

some, like,
classic Indiana Jones porn.

But Forrest shows up
with a dosed canned beverage.

- "Dosed canned beverage"?
- Amphezyne.

- We got him on the prescription.
- Okay.

- That's the whole thing?
- That's the whole thing.

Well, if that's the whole thing,
that's m*rder one. Capital.

- Sound about right?
- Sounds about right, yeah.

[LIGHT TAP]

[SIGHS]

[FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]

Pretty good day.

Okay.

I mentioned to you this morning,

uh, we get him in holding

and some more of the elements
of the case will break.

Uh, that's pretty ordinary,
but, yeah.

And so, they did, as I expected.

So... [SIGHS] Pretty good day.

Good.

Yeah.

So, Tiger Tiger...

That's our guy, Forrest.

False profile.

He led Smernitch to believe
it was a sex hookup on DTF.

And he was ready for sex,

as evidenced by the, uh,
Indiana Jones jack-off classics.

But the weatherman
shows up instead

with a Bloody Mary
and it's got Amphezyne in it.

And, yeah, the weatherman
had a prescription for it.

Less than
a week before. [LAUGHS]

It's Palomar.

- What's that?
- Palomar?

You never heard that in Twyla?

No.

That's the world's
strongest knot.

That's what we call a case
like this that's tied up tight.

It's a Palomar. [CHUCKLES]

JODIE: Floyd Smernitch
wasn't jacking it

to those Indiana Jones photos.

'Cause those photos
are of Floyd Smernitch.

That's not porn. That's
a younger Floyd Smernitch.

[STAMMERS]

JODIE: It has
some other meaning.

- That's him?
- Yes.

He...

[QUIETLY] What?

He brought pictures
of himself there?

- The morning he was k*lled?
- Yes.

And... [SIGHS]

And what?

And the wife lied to me today.

- Yeah, about?
- Their affair.

She's claiming
that Forrest seduced her.

Yeah, and?

I think it was
the other way around, Homer.

♪ ["THE SUN AIN'T GONNA SHINE
[ANYMORE]" BY FRANKIE VALLI PLAYING] ♪

♪ Loneliness ♪

♪ Is the coat you wear... ♪

On your left!

NEWS ANCHOR 1: Meteorologist
Clark Forrest has been charged

with m*rder
of American Sign Language

interpreter Floyd Smernitch.

[DIAL TONE RINGING]

♪ The sun ain't
Gonna shine anymore... ♪

Uh, we are learning from
the District Attorney's office

that there was an affair

- between Forrest and Floyd Smernitch's wife.
- [CELL PHONE BUZZING]

NEWS ANCHOR 2: Further details
of this ongoing investigation

- have not yet been released.
- [CELL PHONE BUZZING]

♪ When you're without love... ♪

[NEWS ANCHOR 2 CONTINUES
SPEAKING ON TV]

- [VOICEMAIL TONE BEEPS]
- CLARK: Hey, uh, Eimy.

I'm being charged, um...

This, uh...

This guy...

This guy is, uh

he's talking
about the death penalty, okay?

Um...

Okay. Bye.

Um...

I don't... I don't understand
what happened.

I had that thing
with Carol, I'm sorry,

but I... I didn't hurt Floyd.

♪ When you're without love ♪

♪ Lonely ♪

♪ Without you, baby ♪

Watermelon Breeze.

♪ Oh, I need you ♪

♪ I can't go on ♪

♪ The sun ain't
Gonna shine anymore ♪

♪ The sun ain't
Gonna shine anymore ♪

♪ The moon ain't
Gonna rise in the sky ♪

♪ The tears are always
Cloudin' your eyes ♪

♪ The sun ain't
Gonna shine anymore ♪

♪ When you're without love ♪

♪ [SINGER VOCALIZING] ♪

♪ The sun ain't
Gonna shine anymore ♪

♪ The sun ain't
Gonna shine anymore ♪

♪ Not anymore ♪

♪ The sun ain't
Gonna shine anymore ♪

♪ Bring it back, baby ♪

♪ Baby ♪

♪ The sun ain't
Gonna shine anymore ♪

♪ Oh, baby, baby ♪

♪ The sun ain't
Gonna shine anymore ♪

♪ [BROODING MUSIC PLAYING] ♪

♪ [MUSIC CONCLUDES] ♪