03x02 - Somebody Nose

[bunniefuu]

[mysterious music playing]

[electricity buzzes]

[riders screaming]

[metallic banging]

[rope creaks]

[music intensifies]

- [metal clanging]
- [powering up]

[Clancy] Come here, you little prick!

- [music fades]
- [all clamoring]

- [Ca$h yelling] Slow down!
- [clamoring stops]

- [exhales] This is crazy.
- One at a time.

[Amerie] What if he's really hurt?

Okay, uh, so, um,
we had the mannequin up on the ride,

and then it… it just suddenly turns on,

and then this guy appears out of nowhere--

Clancy. He runs the carnival
with his wife.

He climbs up the steps,
and he lunges at Malakai.

Then wham, the ride takes him out.

Okay, okay, so who turned on the ride,
this Clancy guy?

- [Amerie] He must have.
- I mean…

Probably trying to scare us or something.

- Exactly.
- Why would he?

- Whoa. Scare you, or hurt you?
- [Missy] It was his fault, right?

[Spider] Yeah. Probably trying
to teach us a lesson. Right?

I mean, it was pretty full on
the way he went at Malakai.

- Yeah, he did jump him.
- [Spider] Yeah.

I have seen him get pretty aggro
after a few beers.

Yeah, and it… it really wasn't that bad,
you know, what we did.

- Well, we did trespass, Am.
- [Ca$h] All right. Listen, everyone!

Delete any photos from the carnival.

- Texts as well.
- No, Ca$h--

Tomorrow, you go to open day
like everything's eetsway.

- This is really wrong.
- [Amerie] Quinni, were you not listening?

He turned on the ride.
We are the victims here.

Honestly, he's lucky
that none of us were injured.

- Otherwise, he would be in huge trouble.
- I know.

- [indistinct chatter]
- Yeah, about that, actually…

Uh… I think I've dislocated my shoulder.
It's all right. I-- Oi!

- Ant!
- Ant! I need someone to pop it in, please.

I think that needs to be done by--

Someone who's not Ant.

- Oh my God, you bunch of pussies!
- [Spider] I told you not to do this.

[Harper] It should be done
by a professional.

- What do I do?
- [Malakai] Get underneath it

and… and shove it up.

- Okay, ready?
- Yep.

One, two…

- [cracking]
- [groaning, whining, screaming]

[screaming]

Here's the smell of blood still.

All the perfumes of Arabia
will not sweeten this little hand.

Okay, are you degenerates,
like, even listening to me?

sh*t.

- [all gasp]
- Come on, people, I need feedback!

I need to make a good impression
on Lane at open uni day today.

Who?

[scoffs] Lane Henson?

She selects the ensemble for SCODA.

My entire future rests in her delicate,
manicured hands, hopefully.

Okay, I don't wanna sound like a b*tch,

but why am I the only one committed
to Operation Act Normal?

I'm so sorry. I'm really out of it. I, um…

I didn't get any sleep last night
thinking about that guy.

Look, there's nothing in the news, okay?

No mention of the carnival.
If he was hurt, there'd have been a story.

- [Woodsy] Banana skin belongs in the bin.
- Woodsy alert.

[Woodsy] Thank you.

A man is dead.

[clanging]

[yelling] What?!

Where's the head?

Oh…

The head? What? My head? [chuckling] What?

Here it is, atop my shoulders,
enjoying this glorious day. [laughs]

- [Woodsy] Thank you, Amerie.
- [fake laughing]

There has been a claim from St. Brunos

that a group of Hartley High students

have stolen a very valuable bust
of their patron saint.

That is… [swallows] …disgraceful.

[Woodsy] Isn't it, Darren?

Especially since I said
there was to be no retaliation.

And yet here we are.

Principal McMahon
wanted to take the matter to the police,

but I have asked that he wait
until the end of the day,

just in case the bust is returned.

Hmm!

[Woodsy] And if you behave yourselves
at the university open day,

there should, in fact,
be no further problems.

- Should there?
- No.

- Should there?
- Mm-mm.

Should there?

[inaudible]

[Harper] Thanks, Miss.

Oh my God. We need to take that bust back.

We do not want the cops
getting involved in this.

- You said that we did nothing wrong.
- Yeah, we didn't.

But, um, who knows how our imperfect
justice system will see these things.

[Spider] At a minimum, they could do you
for breaking and entering.

[intriguing music playing]

[grinding]

[smacks tongue]
Must have happened when it fell.

We can't take it back like this.

[slow clap]

[chuckling] Bravo!

Oh, you dickheads
have really outdone yourselves.

Piss off, Sasha. Not now, okay?

- [Sasha] What were you gonna do with it?
- Nothing.

You just stole it?
That was the whole revenge plan?

[Spider] Mm-hmm.

Well, as vice captain,

I do have a duty to tell Woodsy
that I've located the missing bust.

Oh, here we go.

All year you've been yapping on

about how being vice captain
makes you all superior.

But you know what?

Everyone is just laughing
at how lame you are.

Lame is a really ableist term, Amerie.

- Oh my God.
- [Darren] Shut up, Sasha.

This is why we don't hang out
with you anymore.

How have you managed to figure out
how to criticize literally everything?

[snapping]

[small chuckle]

Whatever. Have fun getting busted.

- [chuckling] Busted. Get it, guys?
- [mocking]

All right. What are we gonna do?

The bus for the uni open day
leaves, like, now.

Well, let's just stash it here.

We will find the nose, return the bust,

but we just have to go
to uni open day and act normal.

[Darren] Okay, I need to run my lines.
Quinni, can you come with me?

[Quinni] No, I need five minutes
in the sensory room.

- [Spider] Let's go.
- I'm gonna take a dump.

[Harper] Ew!

[suspenseful sting]

This noseless f*ck's gonna come back
to haunt me. I can feel it.

[indistinct whispers]

[curious music playing]

"Possible injuries from falling
approx… [sighs] …four meters."

- [door lock chimes]
- [gasps]

[small chuckle]

[mysterious music playing]

Oh! Jeez, bit jumpy there, eh, Sparkles?

Exam stress getting to you?

Yeah, something like that.

Well, today is your lucky day.

For just a small fee,

I can connect you to one
of our wicked smart Year Nines, okay?

We stick a bunch
of glittery sh*t to her face,

wheel her into the exam room in your spot,

mark of 95-plus.

Or your money back, guaranteed. Keen?

Sorry, who are you?

Aside from your personal savior? I'm Taz.

Taz? You're Woodsy's niece.

The hell? How do you know that?

Oh, I'm the school captain,
so she confides in me a lot.

Hmm…

What's she told you then?

[smacks lips] That you had a lot of issues
in New Zealand,

that you moved here three weeks ago,

and that I should let her know if I hear
of you getting up to any trouble.

Okay, look,

I don't see why my auntie
needs to concern herself

with my business dealings.

So let's say you and I forget
we had this little chat?

[door lock chimes]

You're lucky I've got other things
to worry about right now.

Wait, wait, wait. [chuckles]
What's the deal with that room?

Oh, it's a space for students
with sensory issues.

[Taz chuckles]

That's funny, 'cause I sense
I need to be in this room.

Well, you can sense by first of all
obtaining an access card.

You can do that by having a meeting
with Nurse Carol,

and then getting a letter
from your guardian, which, in your case…

uh, Woodsy, right?

- Quinni, bus is leaving in five.
- Okay.

You two, how about finding somewhere
a bit more private

to conduct your human biology tutorial?

["Good Times" by Jungle playing]

♪ It feels like
There ain't nothing to lose ♪

♪ Good times ♪

♪ Don't you leave me now ♪

♪ You'll find ♪

♪ Ooh-ooh ♪

♪ Good times ♪

♪ Got me crying out ♪

♪ Down in the street… ♪

Hey. You considering your options
outside the tattoo apprenticeship?

[scoffs] Nah, Miss,
I'm just here for the bludge.

Right. Okay, well, bludge or not,

I want everyone
on their best behavior, okay?

I'll be roaming. If you can't find me,
look for the sausage sizzle.

Take this opportunity.

Amerie, enjoy the psych talk.

Harper, art session is at two.
Your future awaits.

Not for long.

That statue's nose is probably
at the carnival right now,

just waiting to be found.

Clancy could give it to the cops,

say that he saw kids
fleeing from the scene.

Meanwhile, the St. Brunos principal
reports the stolen bust,

which Woodsy knows we took.

They join the dots,
Noah breaks up with me,

and my spectacular future
comes crumbling down

before my very eyes. [fake laughing]

[mysterious music playing]

[shushing]

- I am losing my g*dd*mn mind here, Harper!
- [Harper] Hey, Am, chill.

You're just tired. Okay?

Everything will be fine.

Okay?

And if it's not, well, at least
I don't have to pay rent in prison.

- Yep.
- Come on, that was funny.

[small chuckle]

[Harper] We'll be okay.

…explicably mimicking him,
hiccuping and amicably welcoming him…

[Lane] Welcome
to the SCODA Drama Workshop.

- Yes, find a spot.
- [sighs] I'm home.

[Lane] Thanks, guys.

Thought your mum
was lining you up to be a carpenter.

You know, like Jesus or some sh*t?

She is.

Okay, and how does this line up with that?

Girls keep complaining about
my performance, so I gotta level up.

Oi! When's the new chapter
of Velvet Thrones coming out?

- I'm getting blue ba*ls over here.
- I'm not the one writing that smut.

- Oh, yeah, right.
- Wait, you can read?

Okay, welcome. Welcome, everyone.

We are just about ready to get started,
so put your things down.

Let's make a circle just in the center
of the space. Yep, in the back, everyone.

Hey, you all good?

Yep. I just have to push
the last 24 hours out of my mind

and manifest my destiny.

[exhales] Okay, we are gonna start
with a quick warm-up.

Uh, does everyone know Zip Zap Boing?

- [girl] Yes.
- Excellent.

Okay, who wants to start us off?

Zap!

[groaning]

And you said you were trying
to do a backflip?

- Uh-huh.
- Must've been some landing.

Yeah, judges only gave me a four.
Can you believe it?

I'd like to get some imaging
to assess the damage.

I see you were in about 18 months ago
for a shoulder complaint?

Oh, that was…
that was a totally different thing.

- He was assaulted by a police officer.
- Mum--

- I regret not reporting that b*stard.
- Can you-- [groaning]

Can you not, Mum? Please.

There's a wait for scans.

- We'll get you something for the pain.
- Yep.

[over PA] Dr. Tran
to the information desk.

[Seb] Yeah.

Yeah, that was one of those sessions.

Yeah, Dad's gonna pay full fee anyway,
so you know how it is.

All right, lads. Catch you later.

["Superbad" by YNG Martyr playing]

- [gasps]
- Hey. Oh, jumpy much?

Sorry, I didn't get much sleep last night.
I'm a little wired.

Up late figuring out where to stash
the St. Bruno statue that you stole?

- No idea what you're talking about.
- Nah, it's fair play, Centrelink.

It's a good get. Our principal is pissed.

Did she stutter?
We didn't take your stupid statue.

Amerie, it's cool. We think it's funny.

- We all think it's funny.
- Hilarious.

Okay, great. Uh, but we didn't do it.

- [Noah] Okay. Yeah.
- Mm-hmm.

You sure you're okay?

- Yep.
- Yeah?

Just tired. Um…

[smacks lips] I'll text you. Yep.

- [kiss]
- Bye.

Harper, go get some career advice.

[slurping]

[Seb chuckles]

[slurping]

Don't be a d*ck.

[intriguing music playing]

[Taz] Access card, access card…

Bingo.

Hey, there she is. New kid on the block.

Taking names, kicking goals…

Uh… You left your lunch
on the counter this morning, so…

Oh, thank you.

You're welcome.

So, what's good?
Settling in all right, Taimana?

I don't know, Auntie.

Why don't you ask your little spy,
the school captain?

Who, Quinni?

Yeah.

No, I… I just thought, you know,
she could show you around

and give you the DL on the skibidi.

I'm not sure
if I'm saying it properly, but--

Hey, look, if you really wanna help me,
just stop telling everyone we're related.

And it's Taz, not Taimana.

[boy 1] I need more money, bro.

Yeah, sure, uh… Taz.

Yeah.

Okay, well, I… I… I'll see you later…

- Okay.
- …at home, Taz.

I mean, keep that on the down low.

[boy 1] Hey, what's your problem?

- Just give me your lunch.
- [boy 2] Stay away from me.

Hey.

Oi.

[boy 1] I'm taking your lunch.

[Taz] Does that happen often?

- Here, have mine.
- [boy 2 chuckles] Thanks.

Happy to help.

Artie Jennings.

[smacks lips]

But, uh… [exhales] …listen, Artie,

there is something you could do for me
to return the favor.

And make a lot of money in the process.

- [girl 1] The new chapter's out.
- [girl 2] I'm on it.

- [girl 1] Writing, narrative…
- [girl 2] I know.

- Here we go.
- [girl 1] Yes! Yes!

[clears throat]
"The queen couldn't help but moan

as she felt Davina's eyes
devour her body from lip…"

[girl 3] Oh my God,
Velvet Thrones is so hot.

[boy 1] I didn't know flutes and elves
were so sexy.

[girl 4] I love Velvet Thrones.

- [girl 5] I've been mazzing all night.
- [girl 6] Fairy lezzos. More!

[girl 7] Oh my God, the bath scene…

[voices overlapping]

"As the queen emerged from the lake,

her naked body
glistening in the moonlight,

she realized that the mage
had cast a vanishing spell."

[sighs] Wish I could cast
a vanishing spell

on your pants right now.

[wondrous music playing]

- Oi.
- [music stops]

I saw Miss Obah telling you off earlier.

What if I told you I had a solution
to your little problem?

A place where you could both be alone
with your velvet thrones,

far away from the prying eyes of teachers.

["Oh Yeah" by Yello playing]

♪ Mmm… Oh yeah! ♪

- ♪ Oh yeah! ♪
- ♪ Chi chicka chickaaa ♪

♪ Oh-oh ♪

♪ Chi chicka chickaaa ♪

♪ Oh-oh ♪

♪ Chi chicka chickaaa ♪

♪ Oh-oh ♪

♪ Chi chicka chickaaa ♪

♪ Oh-oh ♪

♪ Ahh, ahh ♪

♪ Such a future, a good future… ♪

Interested in joining the H.A.G.S?

♪ Chi chicka chickaaa ♪

[music ends]

Hot Activist Girlies.

We bust into factory farms,
liberate the animals,

and then we hook up afterwards.

Kind of like a polycule sitcho.

[chuckling] Oh!

I…

I…

[chuckles]

I-- Yes! Yes, I want to be a H.A.G.

Hot.

Sign up here.

Oh my gosh.
You have no idea how refreshing it is

to finally be surrounded
by like-minded individuals.

I mean, the sheeple at my school,

they don't give a sh*t about anything
other than themselves.

- People are the worst.
- Right?

Um, but not that
I'm gonna let that stop me.

Um, right now, I'm writing an exposé

on this dude who makes Weinstein
look like a saint.

And I mean this guy
is an actual 11th century saint.

[sniffing]

And because the Church
never acknowledged that…

Are you wearing Ache by André?

Yeah.

You know they test on animals, right?

[quietly] It was a free sample.

Come back when you're ready
to live your truth, not just speak it.

[activist scoffs]

- [bleating]
- [rooster crows]

[Harper] Hiding out with the animals, huh?

[Quinni] I know that man
turned on the ride,

but he was only there 'cause of us.

Clancy's indestructible.

One time half a haunted house
came down on him

because he was too wasted to sandbag it.

[sighs] How come
you're not looking around?

[smacks tongue]

I, uh, doubt I'll even get in
after my trial results.

There's still the real exams.

[smacks tongue] Yeah.
Am's on a mission to help me cram.

Exams are a stupid way
to measure someone's intelligence.

Says the girl whose marks
landed her a scholarship.

Shortlist.

Besides, you're more ready
for the real world than any of us.

[Spider mumbling]

- No licking.
- [Harper] Oi, check out Spider.

Yes. Yeah. [laughs]

Can you believe that's the same guy
that started the CUMLORDS?

- Right?
- All right. Ready for your milk?

[Quinni, Harper laugh]

[baby talk] Milkies.
Oh, milkies from Mama.

Look, babe. Babe, look. Look.
Look how cute he is.

Oh, you're so cute. Aren't you cute?

Yeah. I hope Malakai's okay.
His shoulder looked pretty bad, eh?

Well, that's why I didn't
get up on that thing.

Go, sweetie.

Wait, that was a lot last night.

You stress too much.

[smooch]

The course covers areas such as
behavioral neuroscience, social psych,

personality theory, relationship therapy,
abnormal brain behavior.

It's a great career path for your future…

…if you're interested in going to jail
with all your friends.

It's hard work.
The degree can be a real ride.

[indistinct whispers]

A lot of people get hit hard…

[St. Bruno] …by guilt.

It eats away at them.

You did this, Amerie.

Your future is bust.

Get it?

[indistinct whispers]

Can you still study psychology
if you have a criminal record?

Uh, yes, you can. Um, it might affect
your ability to practice though.

- Okay, as I was saying--
- [Amerie] One more thing. Um…

Do you think that
you would get a criminal record

for something like, say, trespassing
if it led to someone being injured?

Uh, I'm not an expert in criminal law,
but it seems likely, yes.

Oh, okay, well… [small chuckle]
What if it was like a… [blows air]

…like an oopsie-woopsie?

Uh, yes, I would say
even if it's an oopsie-woopsie.

Sorry, not really sure how this is--

Unrelated, but if you had planned
a whole future with someone

and then they stuffed it up,
would you break up with them?

- [boy chuckles] What?
- What's your name, dear?

What?

Oh. Never mind. Sorry. Um…

Proceed.

Thank you for the, uh,
truly just riveting…

[church bells tolling]

[St. Bruno] Right your wrongs.
Only then will you be free.

Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm fine.

This is… this is just sleep deprivation.

[St. Bruno] Time is slipping
through your fingers, Amerie.

- [mumbling]
- [St. Bruno] You're going to hell.

Uh… [whimpering]

How long before everybody knows
what you did?

[scrambled unsettling sounds]

- [Amerie gasps]
- Are you all right?

- You look a little bit…
- Deranged.

Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine.

[Missy] At least one of us is.

Malakai just called. It turns out
his shoulder's worse than we thought.

- He's at St. Vincent's waiting on scans.
- What did he tell the doctors, Missy?

I don't know.

[smacks lips]

I gotta go. I gotta go. [panting]

[phone line ringing]

Harps, we're going back to the carnival,

and we are getting
that g*dd*mn nose back right now.

Interesting.

And how did that make you feel?

[Darren] I told her it was
a terrible idea, but she insisted.

[Zoe] I just wanted to have
a nice night out.

[Darren] But a circus?
I mean, doctor, you know my issue.

[Zoe] You mean your fear of clowns?

Mm.

[smacks tongue] It's not a fear,

it's a kink, okay?

If I can't call my wife Mr. Giggles
and honk her nose

while I'm making love to her, then…

[inhales] …what's the point?

And scene.

- [Darren sighs in relief]
- [laughing, clapping, cheering]

[Lane] Thank you all
for such committed improv.

Why'd you have to make it
a weird sex thing?

It's called "Yes And."

- Go finger a unicorn or something.
- [Zoe grunts]

Okay, let's move on to audition prep work.

If anyone's brave enough to share?

I'll go.

[Ant cheers]

Okay. Darren, since you're up there,
let's see what you've got.

[Darren] Great.

[exhales]

[breath trembles]

[inhales]

Here's the smell of blood still.
[smacks tongue]

All the perfumes of Arabia
will not sweeten this little hand.

[audience chuckling]

Wash your hands, king.

Put on your nightgown. Look not so pale.

[laughing]

- Come. Come, come, come. Come.
- [audience laughing]

Give me your hand.

What's done cannot be undone.

To bed.

[audience laughing]

To bed.

To bed.

[cheering]

Lovely. Uh, who wants to share next?

Come on, guys. It's what it's all about.
You gotta get up. Have a go.

[curious music playing]

[girl moaning]

- Hey. Um…
- [girl giggling, moaning]

We heard you might be able to help us out.

You wanna book the Root Room?

- Yes, please.
- Mad lad's been reading Velvet Thrones.

Okay, I can squeeze you guys in
at 2:00 p.m.

Yeah, 30 bucks paid up front.

- [boy moaning] Oh yeah.
- Ooh, plus that lemonade. Thank you.

- [girl moaning]
- Um, Amelia said it was 20.

Well, maybe Amelia needs a lesson
on supply-and-demand economics

'cause there's a lot of horny
Thrones fans in need of some privacy.

Now, do you want it or not?

[boy and girl moaning]

[chuckling] Yeah.

[boy and girl moaning]

- [phone chimes]
- You know,

I hope for your girlfriend's sake,

you're a bit more assertive
in the bedroom, eh?

- [nervous chuckle]
- [Taz chuckles]

[boy and girl moaning]

Beautiful.

[boy and girl moaning]

[sighs]

["Guillaume Tell [William Tell]:
Overture" playing]

[clucking]

- [music intensifies]
- [continues clucking]

We try to, like, free as many
of the poor creatures as possible.

It's, like, really rewarding and hot.

[Sasha] Eat p*ssy, not animals!

- Eat p*ssy, not animals!
- [clucking]

- Eat p*ssy, not animals!
- [clucking]

- I did it! I freed her! I did it!
- [clucking]

- [loud clucking]
- [body thuds]

- [music stops]
- [gasps]

- [chuckles]
- Here, chook, chook, chook.

It's okay. It's okay. Come on.
Here, chook, chook, chook.

We rescued that chicken.

The Vet Science Club was looking after her
while she was waiting to be rehomed.

- Oh, it's okay, I've got her.
- Wow, you're a natural.

Have you ever considered joining H.A.G.S?

- No, no, no. Just…
- [security guard] Oh, come on. Up you go.

- I'm just living my truth.
- Come on.

- No, I was just living my truth!
- Come on.

- So sorry. She's actually with us.
- [security guard] You can take her?

[Jojo] I'm so sorry.
Thank you for your understanding.

[intriguing music playing]

Okay.

Don't you listen
to serial k*ller podcasts?

Returning to the scene of the crime
is how they always get caught.

[phone chimes, clicks]

Okay, well, if the nose broke
when the bust fell,

then it probably, uh, bounced off,
like, that part of the ride

and landed maybe, uh…

[Harper] Am, this is pointless.

We're never gonna find
a tiny piece of rock.

[guard 1] Whoa! Hey, little lady.
Carnival's closed.

Uh, yeah, the-- [chuckles]
The gate was open.

I… I lost my bag yesterday. I think
I might've left it somewhere around here.

Well, you'll need to go speak
to the owner about that.

This area is a no-go zone
while we're investigating.

Investigating? What happened?

That's what we're trying to ascertain.
We're not at liberty to say.

But no one died or anything, right?

[inhales through teeth] Actually, yeah,
someone ended up in St. Vincent's.

Oh my God, who?

- Derek.
- What?

[guard 2] We can't really talk about
an ongoing investigation.

[Harper] Yeah, of course. Um…

[guard 2] Derek shouldn't have disclosed
that piece of information to you…

- …and frankly, it's beside the point.
- [inaudible]

[guard 2] It's important for us to assess
all elements at play…

- …thoroughly and objectively.
- [smacks]

[guard 2] …has no place in what we do
or how we do it.

[Harper] No, of course.
Yeah, no worries. Um…

I'll leave you guys to it. Thanks.

[invigorating music playing]

[inaudible]

Harps. Harps!
I got it. I got it. [panting]

Oh my God.
You should've seen me. [panting]

I was like frigging Spider-Man.

Seriously, I was like…
[imitating web-sh**ter]

- Am. Am. Am.
- [imitating web-sh**ter]

Am, those WorkWatch guys
said that Clancy's in the hospital.

Yeah, he's probably
just sprained a wrist or something.

Harps, we got the nose.
No one's dead. This is a win.

- You said Malakai's at St. Vincent's?
- Yeah, why?

sh*t!

[school bell ringing]

[girl] Take the fairy queen.

- Oh yeah!
- [Woodsy] The bell has gone.

- Why are we standing around?
- [girl] Yes! More pond in there.

- More. More pond. Fairy queen!
- Hey, keep it down in there.

What are you two doing loitering around?

- Oi! I said keep it down.
- Get to class. Thank you.

[girl] More! More!

Okay. No, no, no. Code red! Code red!

- Oh sh*t.
- [girl moaning]

Taimana.

- Hi, Auntie.
- [Woodsy] Hi.

Why aren't you in class?

Um, I got my period.

- Your period?
- Yeah.

- Right.
- [girl giggling]

Just I thought you got that last week.

- [girl giggling]
- Remember when you raided all my pads…

…and used my $90 anti-aging serum
to shave your legs while you were at it?

- Anyway, off to class you go.
- No, wait, wait, wait.

What are you doing?

- [girl] Stop!
- What's going on?

Um…

I'm really thirsty.

Okay, well, get a drink
on your way to class.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

What… What are you doing?

I don't know. What am I doing?

Taz?

- I'm really thirsty, actually.
- Don't you dare!

- [can spraying]
- Ta-- [groans]

[chuckles]

[suspenseful music playing]

My office now!

[exhales]

[girl] Oh sh*t. Let's go!

Well, thank you all for participating
with such openness,

and, uh, I look forward to seeing
many of you at auditions soon.

Thanks, guys.

[indistinct chatter]

Um, see you guys out front.

- Thank you, Lane. Truly love you.
- [Lane laughs]

Uh, Lane?

Darren, what can I do for you?

Um…

I wanted to see if you had any notes
about my monologue.

I kinda got the feeling
you weren't vibing my performance.

You know, it's… it's funny
you use that word, "performance,"

because honestly,
that's what I felt like I was watching.

A performance, a persona.

Something tells me it's one you might've
been playing for quite some time.

I think I was just trying
to play to my strengths.

Yeah.

There's a difference between playing
to your strengths and playing it safe.

You know, chasing a laugh, it's easy.

But it's also a type of armor,
a way of protecting yourself.

- From what?
- You tell me.

The stage is yours
to really show the world who you are.

What do you want them to see?

Thank you.

[pensive music playing]

[beeping]

[indistinct announcement over PA]

[dings]

You look ridiculous.

Clancy got a good look at me too.
I'm not taking any chances.

I cannot believe you can pull this off.

[intriguing music playing]

[whispers loudly] Malakai!

[chuckles] You came to see me.

[Amerie] Why didn't you pick up
your phone?

My n*pples feel weird.

sh*t. He's high on painkillers.

Okay. You need to come with us.

- Well, I'm just making a tea.
- [Amerie] Are you crazy?

- Get this off.
- Hey, that's my happy bracelet.

Listen, okay, Clancy is in this hospital.

He might recognize us,
so we need to stay out of sight.

[whispers] Who's Clancy?

[woman] Harper?

Jackie. [chuckles]

What… what are you…
what are you doing here?

Clancy had a bit
of an accident last night.

- Oh my God, is he all right?
- What are you doing here?

I'm… I'm… I'm…

- Hi.
- I just came to visit a friend.

Carnival's gonna be closed for a while.

That reminds me,
I've gotta let the casuals know.

- Well, would you like me to do that?
- Would you?

- Yeah. Yeah.
- [Jackie] That'd be a huge help.

I've got their numbers in my phone.
It's back in the room.

Oh… oh yeah. Um… Uh…

Why don't you guys go back to the room
and… and I'll meet you there later?

Do you want a tea first?

We're just down this way, love.

[Malakai] Harper wants one.

[mysterious music playing]

[Jackie] I won't be a sec, love.

[door opens]

- [ventilator hissing]
- [heart monitor beeping]

[door closes]

[somber music playing]

[Amerie] He's dying! He's dying!

- We need 50 ccs of Nitazene, stat!
- [laughing] Shh!

- Oh my God!
- [laughing] Stop.

Clear! [groans]

- [laughing] Oh, my ribs.
- We're losing him!

- Come on, you b*stard! Don't die on me!
- Oh, my ribs hurt. [laughing]

I thought your bones would be strong
from all that Swiss cheese.

[laughing]

Hey, at least you have a story
to tell your mates when you get back.

Yeah, pretty painful flight home though.

Oh, I'm sorry, "home"? Really?

[chuckles] Well, yeah.

No, I mean

I'm happier there
than I ever was here, so…

Okay, ouch.

Yeah, well, no one knew me there.
I could just…

Dunno, I could be whoever I wanted to be.

Who was that?

Come on, you don't ever think about
what you left behind here?

No, not really. [chuckles]

Right, this place is cursed.

I've been here for five minutes,
and I'm in hospital.

Yeah, but, I mean, it wasn't this place
that made you come to the carnival

or climb the ride.

Yeah.

You know what I mean. I…

It's being around you.
It just sort of… It creates chaos for me.

Really?

Is that what you wrote
in your mystery letter?

How I'm responsible
for everything wrong in your life. God.

- What? Don't. Don't do that.
- No, dude. No.

Don't just dredge up the past.
I'm a different person now.

Yeah, so you keep saying.

[Malakai exhales]

[phone vibrating]

Cool. Um, well, if I don't see you
before you go,

have a great life
being your amazing new self.

[somber music playing]

[phone vibrating, clicks]

- What?
- [Harper] He's in a coma.

What?

Clancy is in a f*cking coma.

- Are you sure?
- Yes, I'm sure.

Oh sh*t. Okay.

You just go take care of the statue.

I'm gonna stay here for a little bit.
I'll call you later.

Okay.

[sighs]

Hi.

- Um… I've let everyone on the roster know.
- Mm.

Is there anything else I can do?

Oh, I mean, it's… No.

Actually, me and mum didn't have a chance
to grab anything before we came.

- A few supplies would be good.
- Yeah, just tell me what you need.

- I mean…
- Um…

How is he?

Not good.

Only got himself to blame though.

[sighs]

[door opens]

[sighs]

[chair scraping]

[loud sigh]

Oi.

What are you in for?

Stripping down to my undies
and stealing a chicken.

No way. [gasps]

Same.

Care to elaborate?

On how my former friends ditched me
because I have principles?

No, not really.

What are you in for?

[smacks lips]
I sprayed lemonade at Woodsy.

[laughing] Oh, okay. Why?

To prevent her from finding out

I'm renting out the sensory room
for students to have sex in.

See, it's actually really problematic
for you to be misusing a space

specifically designed
for neurodivergent people.

[groans]

Okay. [chuckling] I see why your friends
don't want you around.

["Gladly" by Tirzah playing]

[smacks lips]

But also, screw friends.

[scoffs] Better off without them.
Trust me.

Yeah, that sounds kind of tragic.

Nah, what's tragic is that
I missed seeing you in your undies.

I have a feeling
I would've really liked it.

♪ All I know I got to be ♪

♪ With you, no reason not to be ♪

♪ Next to you, you next to me ♪

♪ Holding you and you're holding me ♪

[music fades]

[Darren] Here's the smell of blood still.

All the perfumes of Arabia
will not sweeten this little hand.

The Thane of Fife had a wife…
Blah, blah, blah. You get the picture. So?

It was great. It was very Darren.

But that's the problem.

- She said I'm a caricature.
- I don't think that's what she said.

She said I use "armor,"
whatever that means.

I don't know.
Can't you just, like, you know,

do it more truthful or something?

Wow, thanks, Stanislavski.

If I knew how to do that, I'd be doing it,
but I don't because I'm sh*t.

You could try a different monologue.

[Darren] There's no time.

[sighs]

That's it. I'm not doing the audition.

- No, you've tried so hard.
- No. Hang on.

I don't know what I'm doing,
and I'm not good enough.

- Darren, come on. You are.
- Come on, no, no, no.

You know what? It's fine.
That dream is over.

- [door closes]
- Now that was a little hammy.

[chuckles]

Hey.

You okay? You sounded weird on the phone.

Hey.

What is it? What's going on?

[Noah] Hmm?

Noah, I need to tell you something.

I messed up really, really bad.

sh*t.

I knew it.

You knew what?

You weren't replying
to my messages last night.

You were acting weird at the uni.

I just…

had a feeling.

That I stole your school statue
and put someone in a coma with it?

- What?
- What are you talking about?

[doctor] Scans show a ligament tear.

Fortunately, it's minor.

What, so no… no surgery then?

A month in a sling should do the trick

and give time for your ribs
to fully recover.

- Yeah, great. Easy. Thank you.
- Hold up, son.

What about travel,
like a long-haul flight to Geneva?

Well, there's a chance of DVT,
and it could be very painful.

Yeah, but, like,
I'm young and fit and stuff, so…

It's just about gauging the risks
you're willing to take.

Well, I'm not willing to take any.
We're staying put until you're better.

- [scoffs] Mum, I can handle it. It's--
- No, Kai, decision made.

Thanks, doc.

- You'll be all right.
- Yep.

[chewing]

So Malakai was at the carnival.
Why didn't you tell me he was back?

Because I didn't know
until he showed up at the carnival.

You know we didn't keep in touch.

Noah, there is nothing going on
between me and Malakai anymore.

Okay. Yeah, I believe you.

Okay.

And what about the other thing?

Do you think I should just
go to the cops about the prank?

It's up to you.

It just might complicate things.

You know, I hope the guy's okay,

but why risk your future
over something that wasn't your fault?

Yeah?

[deep sigh]
Thank you for being so amazing.

Love you.

[Amerie breathing deeply, sighing]

Now spit.

[chuckles]

[clears throat]

All right, St. Bruno.

["Ave Verum Corpus" playing]

[Noah] Nose job.

[Amerie chuckles]

There!

So long, you old b*stard.

[Jackie] But why would Clancy
turn on a ride in the middle of the night?

[Liam] The amount of times
he's gotten wasted.

Oh, you're one to talk.
Out raging until after one.

Three hours I was trying
to get hold of you last night.

Listen, I know what I saw.

That ride was on
when I saw him running towards--

Towards what? What?
What are you saying, Mum?

[Jackie] Someone else turned on the ride.

[door opens]

[door closes]

["Israel's Son" by Silverchair playing]

[Amerie] The bust is officially back
where it belongs,

and we are free and in the clear, baby.

[sighs]

Clancy didn't turn on the ride.

What? No, that's…

That's not possible, Harps.
He… He had to have done it.

Am, it was one of us.

One of us put him in the hospital.

Crap.

[music ends]

[invigorating music playing]

[music ends]