01x07 - The Secretary Does Her Best

[bunniefuu]

["One Room Adventure"

by MADKID plays]

- Hello? Zenia? I'm back!

[Demon Lord clapping]

That's strange.

- What's wrong?

- There's no sign

of Zenia anywhere.

She usually comes running

whenever I call her.

- Probably went

shopping or whatever.

You know, in that

outfit of hers.

- Before we left,

I had asked her to look

into something for me.

Hey! Don't eat all the

souvenir snacks yourself!

- [Max] You snooze, you lose.

- [Demon Lord] No! Give me that!

That one's mine!

I want some of 'em too!

[Demon Lord]

Pay attention, Zenia.

I shall be away for two days.

While I'm gone, I need you to

investigate the Bureau of Magic,

the agency where Fred works.

- Of course. Understood my Lord.

Leave it to me.

Here we go: the Bureau of Magic.

In charge of producing all the

kingdom's magic based energy.

It's also where the

associated military

and political factions

are administered.

An important

government institution.

It makes sense His Grace

would ask me

to investigate this place.

I must accomplish my mission,

no matter what it takes.

I cannot simply waltz

through the front door.

I wouldn't want to be mistaken

for an ordinary secretary.

I'll go around the back where

there are fewer windows.

[tense music]

Zenia Seven Special Spy Tools:

Grappling Hook!

[hook twirling]

Go!

[dramatic music]

[hook clanging]

Perfect.

To remain inconspicuous,

I will enter through the roof.

One of the basics of espionage.

- Dat a*s, though.

[Zenia panting]

As for roof access

Locked, just as I suspected.

Looks like this is a job for

Spy Tool number two:

the Mighty Lock Picker!

[lick pick clicking]

[dramatic music continues]

With this I should be able to.

Come on!

[lock shatters]

Hah!

[door creaking]

Infiltration complete.

Huh?

- Hm?

Who are you?

[Zenia strikes]

[employee grunts]

- Witnesses must be

neutralized on site.

A cardinal rule of being a spy.

But I mustn't forget what

my Lord once told me.

- Humans are fragile, not like

us great and powerful demons.

They shall never awaken

from death's sweet slumber.

You mustn't k*ll them

so hastily.

Is that clear?

- You're the coolest, milord!

- You should appreciate

His Grace.

For you will live

to see another day.

[soft music]

[employee groaning]

- Oh, excuse me.

Wait, who are you?

[Zenia punches]

[employee grunts]

- I'm running into more

obstacles than anticipated.

[grate clangs]

From this point on,

I'll travel by air vent.

The whole reason I came here

was to gather intel.

And what better place

to find intel than an archive

or a server room

containing their computers?

I'll start my search

in this area.

If I return with the

Magic Bureau's data in hand,

His Grace is sure

to be delighted!

Cafeteria.

Bathroom.

[campy music]

[Zenia gasping]

I found it! The server room!

[employee sneezes]

- Ugh. It's freezing.

- One staff member.

I'll have to take care

of him first.

Spy Tool number four:

Blow Dark Tranquilizer!

[dart thuds]

- Hm?

What's this?

- Espionage!

[employee groaning]

Take this!

[Zenia thuds]

[employee groaning]

There we go.

Now the important work begins.

Spy Tool number five:

Hacking Software.

It's going to take a long time

to download this data.

Maybe I ought to focus on

the relevant info.

Lots of emails to go through.

"Travel costs are

employees' duty."

"Smartphones must be

charged at home."

What a tight wad,

stingy company.

This one's from today.

"Vodka and the Royal Army

Soldiers who accompanied him

during the Gamma Republic

invasion were forced to retreat.

We were correct in assuming

that our usual strategy

would prove inadequate.

The key to successes is-"

[door creaking]

[Zenia gasps]

- So you must be the reason.

I was beginning to

get a headache,

not unlike when

a storm rolls in.

What are you doing here, demon?

Spying?

- Time for Spy Tool

number six:

Smoke b*mb!

[b*mb exploding]

[industrial music]

- Gotcha!

[metal clangs]

I don't appreciate

your foolishness.

Although, I can use it

to my advantage.

[Zenia groaning]

[metal clangs]

[Zenia grunting]

[chains rattling]

- My apologies, Chief Secretary,

for allowing such a

suspicious infiltration.

I'll go ahead and

contact the police.

- Oh, there's no need.

- Sir?

- Go wait outside if you would.

And don't let anyone in here.

Now, why don't you

just sit back

and answer a couple

of questions?

First off, what's your name?

- I'm a proud member

of the Demon Race.

I will not identify

myself to humans.

- Ah, so you are a demon.

I've gotten my confirmation.

Thank you.

- Oops!

- This brings back memories.

I saw a lot of demons

during the w*r 10 years ago,

but I've never seen one

as cute as you before.

- Huh? What's that even

supposed to mean?

Flattery won't work!

[Fred laughs]

- Sorry, had to try.

You live here?

What do you do for a living?

- All right, that is enough!

You're mocking me, aren't you?

If you're going to k*ll me,

then just do it.

I, Zenia, would die before

I gave up my pride as a demon

and surrendered to

the likes of you!

- Gotcha. So your name's Zenia.

- Dammit! Tricky b*stard!

Quit asking me all these

confusing human questions!

[Zenia yelling]

- Oh!

By the way, my name's Fred,

I'm the Chief Secretary

of the Bureau of Magic.

I should have

introduced myself first.

My apologies again.

- I already know who you are.

Alongside the Hero

with his friends,

you're a threat to His Grace

and our race.

Our most reviled and

loathsome enemy.

- By His Grace,

you mean the Demon Lord?

Enemy or not, his skills

were impressive.

So, you're here on

the Demon Lord's orders?

- No, not at all.

How very foolish.

His Grace has been asleep

ever since you

defeated him in the w*r.

It was my own curiosity that

got the better of me and, uh

- Ah

It's interesting, Zenia.

I get the sudden

distinct feeling

that I've seen you

somewhere before.

- Now what are you

trying to pull?

You won't get any more

information out of me.

- Oh, where, oh where

could it have been?

Oh, that's right, I remember

where it was now.

See?

[Zenia grunts]

Right here.

That's you, isn't it?

[Zenia squealing]

- Wait! Where'd you

get that photo?

Were you hiding in the

bushes, you damn pervert!

- It's an article from

a news website.

A fairly recent one.

Prancing through the streets

in your birthday suit,

very bold.

- You don't understand,

I got kind of drunk and I just,

well, you know!

- I get it. It's easy to

get carried away

when there's alcohol involved.

You must have had a good time.

Just wish I'd been there

to see it.

So, were you drinking with

the guy running away from you?

- [Zenia] Um, uh, yes.

- Well, he's a real

piece of work, huh?

Getting you inebriated

and in such a state,

then not taking responsibility.

I don't know who the hell he is,

but he's a lousy,

pathetic creep!

You should not hang around

guys like that, Zenia.

[Zenia chuckles]

How did you even meet

him in the first place?

- Oh, well,

I was drunk, so it's

just sort of a blur.

- [Fred] Huh.

Then this was the only

time you ever saw him?

- Yeah, that's right.

Not saying that anything

happened between us though.

- Huh. Wonderful.

You have no idea how

relieved I am to hear that.

I couldn't bear the thought

of a nice girl like you

associating with that

sleazy old scumbag.

[Zenia laughing]

- Oh no, I would never do that.

I mean, who do you think I-

[magic bangs]

[Zenia grunts]

- Enough with the

innocent act, Zenia.

Exactly how naive

do you think I am?

Answer me.

Why get close to him?

What's the end goal?

Well?

You are nothing but

filthy disgusting demons.

Why are you trying to

get in this good graces?

Talk!

[door opens]

- Excuse me.

Chief Secretary,

Minister Grimms is here

to speak with you, sir.

- Tell him he needs to wait.

- But sir, he says he has

something important to discuss.

He is requesting an audience.

[Fred groans]

- Those handcuffs are designed

to suppress the wearer's magic,

which means you cannot use

your demonic powers for now.

So don't even think

about trying to escape.

- Chief, sir.

- I mean it.

Do not alert the

authorities about this.

I need you to keep a close eye

on her until I get back.

[steel guitar strumming]

- Oh, Chief Secretary Fred!

I'm so sorry to interrupt

your busy schedule, sir.

- It appears that his Excellency

is staying busy as well.

- Let me take you out some time.

I know a fantastic

restaurant for us.

- I'm extremely flattered, sir,

but no, I couldn't possibly.

- Your Excellency,

Chief Secretary Fred

is here to see you.

- Oh!

Fred, my man!

Feels like it's been

far too long!

- A personal visit from

the third Minister himself?

You greatly honor me,

Lord Grimm.

[Grimm shouting]

- I see you've mastered the art

of a*s-kissing, my dear boy.

Well done. Good job.

[Fred grumbles]

- What in the world is

Chief Secretary thinking?

Who ties someone up in their

office, interrogates them,

and refuses to call the police?

He's holding this woman hostage.

- God, I screwed up!

Getting captured and

spilling the beans?

I must conceal the fact

that His Grace has been

reborn at all costs.

He's only been awake

for a short time.

If a fight broke out, he would

be at a huge disadvantage.

Either way, I need to focus on

getting out of here first.

Um, excuse me.

- What's the matter?

- Um, I'm sorry, but I

have to go to the bathroom.

- Fine then.

[clock ticking]

- Sorry for dropping in on you

without an appointment.

How's it been hanging, Fred?

- Please keep it brief,

your Excellency.

The Chief Secretary

is a very busy man

and his time is

very precious right now.

- Ah, here, let's take

a selfie together.

See cheese, Freddie boy!

[phone clicks]

- Please, your Excellency.

- Oh, it came out great!

What a beautiful smile, Fred,

you're a natural.

You like it?

It's a filter that changes

your expressions.

- My deepest apologies, sir.

Do not post that

on social media.

The last time your schedule

leaked and blew up online.

- Too late! I already posted it!

[secretary gasps]

[Fred grumbles]

- Well, you look dreadful.

You still worried then,

about Leo I mean?

- Why wouldn't I be?

Well, as far as his effect

on the kingdom's reputation

and economic interest,

of course.

[Grimms sighs]

- Makes you miss how things

were a decade ago,

even if we were poor.

The Hero and his crew

defeated the Demon Lord,

and the whole country

was on cloud nine.

I wonder though, how Max

is doing these days.

You ever talk to him?

Your old pal?

- No, I don't.

He's not the same man he was.

- [Grimms] That's too bad.

- Excellency,

why don't we discuss this

over lunch some other time?

- Oh, you're right!

My folly.

I should cut to the chase,

shouldn't I?

I'll get down to it then.

- Well, I hope you've learned

your lesson about sneaking

onto government property.

- I'm ashamed of myself.

- Here you go.

Nice and easy.

There.

- [Zenia] My jumpsuit.

- [Lim] Right.

I'll unzip it for you.

Oh, you picked the worst outfit.

Better?

Do I need to, uh, clean you up?

- [Zenia] The bidet, please.

On low.

- [Lim] You're awfully demanding

for a captured spy.

- Thank you very much!

[water running]

When Fred comes back,

I'm in trouble.

There's a chance he'll find out

about His Grace this time.

I must escape before

that happens.

- All right, open wide.

[Zenia chewing]

Okay, so what do you

want to eat next?

- I guess asparagus

and bacon, please.

- All righty then,

coming right up.

- If I'm going to escape,

I'll have to do something

about this woman.

I feel terrible about it though.

- I want to thank you for

letting me borrow Vodka.

In the end, well,

you know what happened.

But luckily, I've been

told his injuries

are not life

threatening.

Although still, I can't help

wonder how things got so bad.

- The blame rests solely

on Leo's shoulders.

If he hadn't decided

to be so selfish-

- But the hippie fella

did hit the jackpot

with his Gamma District.

He and his chums found a giant

mine full of magic ore!

If the kingdom were to extend

its gracious hospitality

and absorb the territory.

- If we did that,

it would destroy the kingdom's

upstanding reputation.

Leo refused to admit

that he took bribes,

then he doubled down and

defected without warning.

That's not the kind of thing

we can just sweep under

the rug and forget about.

- Fred, my dear boy

Do you really believe Leo's

the type of guy to take bribes?

- Honestly, I'm not sure he has

enough brain cells

to be involved in such things.

- [Grimm] I thought

the same thing.

Somebody framed Leo.

I feel so bad for him.

- But even so, sir,

his defection was

self-serving and ego-driven.

End of story.

- You've got a point.

Alas, he was an example

of what it meant to be

loyal to the kingdom,

and it stabbed him in the back.

Probably too much

for anyone to bear.

He is a man of integrity.

If you ask me,

it's rather commendable.

Well, kind of.

But not really.

- Those who ride

the moral high horse

will demand that everyone around

them share in the exact ideals.

The Gamma Republic is

destined to fail.

That's all there is to it.

- Oh boy.

Then I don't think

you're going to like

what I'm about to tell you.

[secretary sighs]

The truth is, I'm toying with

a little idea,

a peace treaty with

the Gamma Republic.

- What?

- Lots of folks sympathize

with Leo and the Republic;

even some of

the kingdom citizens.

If we go the peaceful route,

I think I'd be able to

drum up some support.

And most importantly, the

Gamma Republic has yet to cause

any direct harm to the kingdom,

outside of self-defense that is.

The global community's

perception of the kingdom

keeps getting worse

year after year.

So recognizing them as an

independent country

would change the story.

Each side making concessions,

of course.

I'd rather settle this mess

without a big nasty kerfuffle.

What say you?

- I'm not sure where

this is coming from.

What did the other

ministers think?

- The old lady's on board.

She's always cared for Leo.

And as for the rest of them

I'll go to work convincing them.

- One step at a time,

right, sir?

- But before that, I was

thinking it would be wise to put

a temporary hold on all military

operations at the border.

My goal is to establish

a useful alliance;

one that's practical,

peaceful, constructive.

And your support is a crucial

part of achieving that, Fred.

Your Leo's swell pal.

And perhaps even

more importantly,

you're a hit with the public.

[Fred groans]

[clock ticking]

[droning music]

- I've got no choice.

Either way,

I have to get these

magic suppressing

handcuffs off first.

And there's one detail

Fred failed to account for:

I can't even use magic.

This is exactly the kind of

situation I prepared for.

Hidden in my back pocket,

Spy Tool number seven:

Oil Slick!

[Zenia grunting]

[oil splashing]

Perfect.

And now I slip right out.

[chains rattling]

[Zenia grunts]

- What exactly are you doing?

- I was thirsty, so I decided to

have a refreshing sports drink.

It spilled.

- What kind of sports

drink is this greasy?

[Lim groans]

Now look here,

I am an officer.

I report to the Chief.

I know a thing or two

about magic myself.

And while I prefer not,

I will use force

if you try anything.

Understand?

I'm not taking you to

the bathroom again either.

Are you listening to me? Hello?

That's not going to help you

escape from here.

Please, just sit there and-

[handcuffs cracking]

Oh?

[Zenia grunting]

[handcuffs shattering]

[Lim gasps]

- All right, I'm free!

[Zenia thuds]

Ouchie!

I forgot my feet.

- So you're not just

some clueless bimbo

in a costume, it seems.

- Come on!

[Zenia grunting]

[flames roaring]

[strap snaps]

[Zenia panting]

Now I understand why the Chief

had to tie you up.

You're a class A security risk.

You are staying with me.

[Zenia gasps]

[flames roaring]

- Can I count on your

cooperation then, my boy?

- Of course.

Who am I to consider denying

the honorable Lord Grimms?

I'll do everything

in my power to help.

- Come here, you little

cutie patootie!

[Grimms laughing]

[Fred grunting]

- I'm not a patootie!

- But I feel better.

How about you?

We'll talk details

down the road.

Sorry again for

barging in so suddenly.

- Oh no, not at all.

Now please leave.

- Thank you for your

time, Chief Secretary.

Bye.

- Ta-ta.

[Fred sighs]

- It was good to see you,

your Excellency.

- Thank you for coming in,

Lord Grimms.

- Thank you, sweet cheeks.

Appreciate ya.

[fire roaring]

[Zenia grunting]

- Well, you're strong,

I'll give you that.

Are you satisfied now,

Miss Sneaky Spy?

[Zenia grunts]

No need to panic.

These flames are

under my control,

down to their temperature, the

smoke, and how fast they spread.

I won't let you die.

- I can't breathe.

- Go ahead and lie down.

- I'm going to

- Isn't this great Lord, Grimms?

- Yes, but we've still

got work to do.

- This is going to be

stressful as hell.

I swear to God.

[car rumbling]

[fire humming]

[clock ticking]

- Now then, what's up next

on the schedule?

- Let's see how many likes we

got with our photo, shall we?

- First, you have a meeting

with Vice Minister Melvin.

After that there's the annual

Plum Blossom Festival.

[building exploding]

[Lim gasping]

[debris roaring]

[suspenseful music]

[tires screeching]

- Did you guys see that?

A huge expl*si*n

at the Magic Bureau!

- Oh my God!

- Well, don't stop here.

You're putting us all in danger.

Chop, chop. Drive on.

I don't want any part

of such a mess.

[both gasping]

- Uh-huh.

- t*rrorists always make

the worst decisions.

The Republic screwed up

this time.

It'll certainly turn up

the pressure.

What now, my cutie patootie?

["Mirai=Teleport"

by Nenne plays]