01x03 - Mommy to Mom Boss

[bunniefuu]

So our first class today is going to be
on porcelain appreciation.

Okay.

Give it a go.

I feel you're setting me up for failure.

So in German,

whenever you see two dots,
that's called an umlaut.

- Okay.
- So instead of "co," it's "kuh."

Uh.

- German is a very "spank me" language.
- Mm-hmm.

When you think of BDSM,
you think of German.

- Oh.
- Yes.

And "ch" is like a "gsh."

- "Gsh."
- "Gsh."

Königliche.

Oh, my God.

You can do this.

Königliche.

Königliche.

Königliche porzellan manufaktur.

"Königlick..."

Königliche "porzeszan manufachtur."

- You have to think "spank me."
- That's right.

You got it! See? You think
"spank me," immediately you got it.

- I did.
- Is that how you like to be spanked?

I'm Rai Jones, and I'm 34 years old.

Down.

This damn dog. I'm so sorry.
All right, move.

Okay, up at the table.

I'm a stay-at-home mom.

Okay, you're gonna get a bagel
and you want...

- A waffle!
- A waffle, all right.

Growing up, it was me and my mom.
I was raised by a single mom.

The family I have made
is my husband Matthew

and my two daughters
Madeline and Penelope.

I don't even... I can't even count
how many bagels that I've made.

I reckon we go about two packets per week.

A hundred?

I hate cooking,
I love the pre-packaged stuff.

Anything I can put in a toaster
or microwave is the best thing ever.

All my energies have kind of gone
into raising my children.

I've been a stay-at-home mom
for both of them.

Oh, look at that, rock stars!

I might have to get out stickers.

But now they're ten and eight,
they're becoming more independent.

Would you like super or brilliant?

Brilliant.

- Brilliant. Yes, you are brilliant.
- Thank you.

I feel like I'm becoming
less and less relevant.

I feel a bit redundant in their lives.

I want to go back into the workforce

because I want to be
a great role model for my kids.

Like, I want them to be brave and bold.

Then, if I want them to do that,
I have to demonstrate that.

If I tell them the world is your oyster,
I have to prove it.

Sneak laundry.

This is what's gonna happen to me
if I don't get a job.

It's just gonna be me and the dog.

Everyone else will go on with their life,

and I'll just be the crazy dog lady.

To be honest, you know,
my confidence is really down,

um, because I've been
a stay-at-home mom for so long.

And, you know,
we have this everyday routine.

I kinda feel stuck in a rut.
I kinda feel like Groundhog Day.

And I just can't break out
of my box anymore.

And my biggest fear is that

I'm gonna be 60
and have never left this house.

And I just...

Do not film my laundry room.

I said don't film my laundry room!

I see you, I see you! What are you doing?

So this is my crystal collection.

That's a heart tie to my great-grandmother
and all my great-aunts,

who I used to always play
with their collections when I was young.

The fact that Sara uses etiquette

as part of her teaching
really appeals to me because, for me,

etiquette is always about
putting other people at ease,

and also being confident in any situation.

That's what I'm looking for,
for Sara to be a mentor

to help me translate

my stay-at-home mom skills
into employment skills.

And I'm hoping that
she can help me dust myself off.

Spiffy myself back up
and get back out into the workforce.

- Hello!
- Hey, Raishel!

- Welcome to my school.
- Thank you so much for having me.

- Have a seat.
- Thank you.

- I love your style.
- Thank you so much.

- I love your necklace.
- Thank you.

Wow! This girl has amazing style.

- Would you like some tea?
- Yes, please.

And some English breakfast.

It all looks so lovely.

So, tell me about yourself.
What brings you to my school today?

Well, I'm a mom of two.

My daughter, oldest is ten,
and my youngest is eight.

Wow.

But because of that, I've been out
of the workforce for nearly ten years,

and I need help getting back in.

Seems like you really
just put family first.

Yes, 100%.

- Well, feel free to dig into breakfast.
- Thank you very much.

Freeze. Don't move.

You're holding your fork like a pen.

- Yes.
- Which is a no-no.

Oh!

I was definitely nervous to sit down
with an etiquette teacher

because she's a professional
and she's like amazing at it.

And I was just like,
"Oh my gosh, don't shame the family."

Do my aunts proud. Like,
"I taught you better than this, Rai!"

Womp-womp. Okay, what should I do right?

Okay, put the ends of your cutlery
into the palm of your hand.

Okay.

And face it... Face me like this.

Okay, good. And your index fingers
are over the back.

Yes.

And that way, when you cut,
you have leverage.

That is a common mistake.
Raishel was holding her fork like a pen.

Usually, I see students
hold their knife like a pen.

As soon as I taught her
the right way to hold her knife and fork...

Good, I'm impressed.

...she was really mindful.

And got it right
every single time afterwards.

I can taste the elegance.

Mm!

How do you eat a sunny-side up?

I like to cut all around it.

And this is how
I keep my plate nice and tidy.

Wow.

- Mm.
- Duh-duh-duh-dun!

Here we go.

Mm!

Sometimes with utensils,
it can feel a bit awkward.

But now that I know how to do it properly,
there's no awkwardness, great balance.

Definitely will do this
the rest of my life.

Raishel is inquisitive and eager to learn.
That makes her an ideal student.

I'm going to enjoy teaching her.

So tell me about where you're from.

Originally, I'm from
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.

- Mm-hmm.
- I was raised by a single mom.

I'm an only child, so it was just me
and my mom growing up.

She was a working mom.

And she did her best
to provide me with a good life.

Was your mom a role model for you?

Yes, my mom was a role model for me
and she continued to improve herself.

And that made you feel like,

"I wanna be a role model
for my daughters"?

Yes. So, for my own daughters,

I wanna do well in the workplace,
so I can inspire them the same way.

I know it can be done. My mother did it.

She was there for me.
I didn't feel neglected in any way.

And she's held down a job.
So it can be done.

My mom was
a huge role model for me too.

Um, my mom passed away
from cancer

- when I was in college.
- I'm so sorry.

And from diagnosis to death,
it was just three months.

- Very quick.
- Wow.

Um...

That's really moving for me to hear
because my mom also passed away.

She passed away one month
before my first daughter was born.

And we were planning her trip
to come see me and be there for the birth.

Uh, it was so sudden for me and we had
so much excitement to see each other.

And then I realized
I was never going to see her again.

She's still alive for me,
and so... until I have to talk about it.

It always just feels new.

It's been so difficult to raise
my children without my mother,

but I aspire to be as strong as her.

So I want to honor her and I also want
to pass that example down to my girls

because she was the strongest
and most loving woman I've ever known.

I miss her. I miss her a lot.

But I feel really grateful
that I had her for those 21 years

as opposed to not having her now,

because who I am today
really is so much because of her.

Mm.

I want to show Raishel
that you can't let that pain define you.

Her mother would want her to carry on
and live a full and happy life.

So I do aspire
to kind of get back on the wagon,

so I can make her proud.

Good.

Everyone,
please pick up a wine glass.

That's correct, holding it at the stem.

Especially when it's champagne
and white wines as they're served chilled.

Your hands may affect
the temperature of the wine.

Red wines are not served that cold,
so it's not so bad.

We as ladies usually wear lipstick

and that leaves a stain
on our glasses when we drink.

What should we do?

You look very busy.
How will you do it, Joey?

I will do it elegantly.

Let me tell you a secret.

When you're drinking,
don't let the glass touch your lips.

Instead, let it rest
on the inside of your lips.

This way, you won't leave
a lipstick stain.

Give it a try. That's it!

Petrell.

You drank too much!

I like to drink!

Okay.

But if it's too tricky
or if you have already left a stain,

then keep drinking from the same place.

Don't go around the whole glass!

Okay? Got it?

My plan today is
to take Raishel from desperate housewife

to career woman.

Welcome to the classroom!

- Thank you. It's lovely.
- Have a seat.

Ten years is a long time
to be out of the workforce,

but with a little help,
I'll get her right back in.

All right, well, this next lesson
is going over your CV

- and giving you some career guidance.
- Yes, please. Thank you.

Okay, and what are you passionate about?
What do you enjoy?

Through my grief of losing my mom,

the one thing that was always
a bright light for me was fashion.

That's something I can always
turn to that helps cheer me up.

I love to dress up
because it's a connection

not only to my fashion sense,
but to my family back home.

When I was a child,

I would dress up in my great-aunt's
wardrobe and play in that.

It's kind of an attempt
to live out a fantasy.

Be Audrey Hepburn for a day.

I love this headpiece.
It goes with every outfit.

It even goes with this outfit.

Boom. Boom.

So, uh, one of my favorite hobbies
is entering fashion competitions,

and the best-dressed lady
gets a sash and a prize.

And I've won 13 times.

Sashes. Sashes.

The reason why I kind of keep
my sashes in the bottom drawer,

in the back of my closet,
I get self-conscious about my wins.

I just feel awkward praising myself.

So have you had some idea about
what kind of job you want to do?

Um...

I've had a long time to think about it.

I would like to perhaps
work maybe with an NGO

that gets women back to work
or helps serve underprivileged women.

Interesting.

Then again, I need to have my own career
before I can give advice to anyone, right?

Well, no, I think you can
absolutely meld the two.

So I have a copy over here of your CV

and I thought we could
walk through it together.

A great CV should have
what I call the three Ds.

Desire, direction, and discipline.

When I look at this,
the first thing I see is your nickname.

- "Rai Jones."
- Yes.

You always want to put
your full name, professional name.

So, Raishel. Okay.

Then, are these classes you took in 2008?

Yes, it's silly to list them all there,
but I was trying to fill up the page

'cause you can't have half a page.

And what is this below? I see you...

Is this work that you did during college
that you've put on here?

- Yes.
- Receptionist at student services.

Event manager at student restaurant?

Right now, these sound like laundry list.

So, I would cross those out because

anything you did in college
is so far away.

Yeah.

On Raishel's CV,

she has too much stuff
that's really irrelevant.

Stuff that's ten, 14 years ago.

So she needs help updating her CV.

Let's get to work on that.

You know what?

Haven't you been doing all this stuff
with your fashion and styling

and competing in competitions?

I have, but that's not a business,
that's a hobby.

- That's okay. That's an achievement.
- Okay.

You achieved stuff there.

Yeah, I did achieve stuff there.
I did 13 sashes and national wins.

- Right! That's huge.
- Yeah.

Thank you!

If you have performed something
on an impressive level,

or if you've taken exams
to show progress in something,

or if you've won competitions,
that should be in your CV.

That is your true passion.

So if you're gonna apply
to not-for-profit fashion-related jobs,

- you should totally add that.
- Okay.

That's a big part of who you are
and what you wanna do.

Thank you. Yes, that is true.

I feel really excited.

Sara pulled out
a lot of things from my CV,

especially my hobbies
that I could use for an employer.

She's doing what I was hoping for.

She's identifying skills
I could use in a future career.

So, I think you have
a little bit of updating to do.

- Yes, let's do that.
- Let's do it.

Business etiquette tip.
Don't use a laptop in a meeting.

It puts up a wall and is distracting
for the other person.

Use a notebook and pen instead.

Oh my God. Brazilian jiujitsu?

Karate?

What have I gotten myself into?

Oh, goodness.

I have no idea
what Sara has planned for me,

but I have not worked out since... never.

I have never worked out,
so I'm really nervous.

Hey, Raishel.

- Come over here!
- Hi!

- Get over here!
- Okay.

This is Master Chan.

- Hi, Raishel.
- Nice to meet you.

Raishel is our student for today.

I'm your student for today?

You're Master's student for today.

I thought I was gonna be
your witness for today.

I was gonna sit there
and watch you do something.

No, anything that's gonna be done today
is gonna be done by you, my dear.

You're gonna have
to connect the dots for me, Sara.

How does this relate to...?

I'm absolutely baffled
for why I'm here at kung fu.

I have no idea what this
has to do with my job search.

I'm hoping that Sara can help me
with my confidence

and give me some
actionable skills I can use.

Kung fu is more than just physical.

It's also about having a laser focus,

a clear focus and really
achieving your goals.

- Right, Master?
- Yes.

You learn about philosophy,
discipline, control.

Okay.

And respect.

I respect you both, so I'm happy
to try this out and take this on board.

Give it a go. I'll hand her over to you.

First of all, today,
we'll do some very basic work.

- Punching, blocking, kicking.
- Okay.

First, we work on this side punch.

- To the chest.
- Okay.

Hold your right hand back on the hip.

Okay, so one...

I was really nervous about it
because I am not a coordinated person.

Like, "You look coordinated.
You should be a great dancer."

- One, two, three.
- Okay.

That's it. One, two, three.
Put this hand back.

I'll put it right back.

No, not over here. Okay.

I have two left feet.
I'm not very coordinated.

- When you breathe, breathe here.
- Okay.

- This part here.
- Okay.

Okay, ready? One, two, three.

Yeah. One, two, three. Good.

But then when I actually
started working with the master,

you do the patterns, you're breathing,
your mind settles a bit,

and I kinda just got into the zone.

Now!

Nice! You're having fun with this.

On that impact, you see her
break out into a beautiful smile.

You could really see her change.
You could see her grow.

Okay, relax.

Picked it up very well.

So, yes, you surprised me at first,
making me do something.

Then, when I have time to think,
I really start to understand.

And it really makes sense.

This gives you body confidence
because you feel so strong.

You feel so powerful and so focused.

It felt really good.

But most importantly, if you want to be
a strong role model to your two daughters,

you have to be emotionally strong,
physically strong.

- So here's to strong women.
- Yes.

- May we know them.
- Strong mind.

- May we raise them.
- Strong heart.

And may we be them.

Very well said, Sara.

Thank you.

Hyah! Again. One.

Two. That's it.

So our next dish is caviar.

Russians will always pair
caviar with vodka.

And caviar must be consumed cold.

Also, remember that
you should use 24K gold

or mother-of-pearl spoons
when having caviar.

Why?

That's because caviar is acidic.

And if you use a silver spoon,

it will oxidize.

First, put the caviar
on the back of your hand.

And then you lick it off.

Follow that with a shot of vodka.

We're going to lick a caviar hand cream.

Everyone grab a shot of vodka.

Pass one to Jessie,
she's been waiting for it.

Let's all stand up
and make it more festive!

Now lick it.

Joey, eat it faster.

Oh, it's salty.

Cheers! Bottoms up, everyone!

Here's to good health! Bottoms up!

Mm!

You want another shot?

I'm drunk. I need to take a seat.

- You need a nap?
- It's time for bed.

So the place I'm taking you to next

is going to be perfect for you to restart
your career by being a volunteer.

Oh, awesome!

I've been a housewife for ten years now,

and I didn't really establish my career
that much before I became a housewife.

So, I'm really excited
to be volunteering here.

- Oh, hi!
- Hey, Leisa!

Hi!

So that I can prove to myself

that I can re-enter the workforce
and get the confidence and the skills

to be able to do that.

Leisa is the CEO of Dress for Success,

and it's all about empowering women
to get back into the workforce

and achieve economic independence.

- Exactly.
- That sounds amazing.

I'm looking forward to you joining.

I look forward to it too.
It sounds fantastic.

Oh, great.

The trick to volunteering is to
choose something you're passionate about,

and Raishel is definitely
passionate about fashion.

But one thing she lacks
is experiencing styling other people.

I'm so excited.

- Should we check out the styling room?
- Yeah, come this way.

- We'll do a role-play.
- Okay.

Let's pretend I need to get back
into the workforce in an insurance job.

- Okay.
- Style me.

Awesome, this is gonna be fun!

This is so exciting.

Being surrounded by all these
beautiful things and accessories,

and being in a space where
they're so giving and supportive,

it made me feel instantly very good.

So we're gonna do insurance,
so it's very conservative.

The traditional is to have a black suit.

Looking through the racks,
there's large variety to choose from.

That's really good.
Gray is very traditional.

I was thinking what I wanted
to emphasize about her.

It's a conservative job.

- Jackets are over there.
- Okay.

- Do we have outfit one?
- Yeah, I think we could.

So, I wanted to have something
that was a bit muted

and definitely appropriate.

I'm gonna come out. I'm ready.

- Come out!
- Ta-da!

That looks lovely on you!

I feel like cap sleeves,
is there arm fat coming out?

No. You'll be putting your blazer on top.

So if you feel uncomfortable,
the blazer will hide that.

In styling, experience matters
more than a diploma.

Sure I don't need to button this up
or maybe some kind of waist detail?

The importance of how to communicate
with your customer is very important.

I feel like this makes my body
seem longer and my legs seem shorter.

Whereas this just visually...

- Know what I mean?
- Yes.

Sara is not impressed.

But when you style someone,
it's about their style, not your style.

I have to present myself better.
I'll have to work on it.

We could put a belt with it
or a shorter jacket.

Okay!

She's a little rattled,
but the good thing is that

the pressure is forcing her
to think on her feet.

Cropped jackets in a size six.

I do know Sara likes a bit of color.

We're going to try maybe some navies.

- Better.
- That could work.

This could work.

Yeah, that looks nice.

For good role-play, that's what you need.
You need to have a sparring partner.

- Oh, you look amazing!
- I love this.

That fits you so much better.

- Yeah!
- Great, this looks brilliant.

I feel beautiful. I feel confident.

I feel appropriate.

I feel like I'll go in and nail
this insurance interview.

Wonderful. I think you look beautiful.

When I saw Sara's glow
after she found an outfit she loved

and how she brightened up a bit,

seeing that lift was an absolute joy,
it made my heart sing.

And, Raishel, I mean,
what you're doing for, not just me,

but for other customers
that will come here,

is help people with their self-esteem,

which in turn will give you
a sense of achievement.

We got a full list of clients next week,
so I hope you can come back.

- Absolutely.
- Thank you.

You're gonna be busy.

I'm ready to go!

Here's a tip.

When saying cheers,
make sure to make eye contact.

If you don't, you know
what the Europeans say.

You'll suffer seven years of bad luck.

And who wants that?

Today, I think we should have
some tea and make some dumplings.

- What do you guys think?
- Great!

Dumplings
date back to ancient China.

Every Chinese New Year,
we come together to prepare dumplings.

Who has made dumplings?

I have.

I've eaten them.

Everybody makes
their own dumplings.

We say the more you eat them together,
the better your bond will become.

Oh, those are so beautiful!

- Hey, Raishel!
- Hi!

Hi!

So this is Raishel, our student.

And these three are also our students.

I brought Raishel in
to meet the ladies today,

so she could be in a safe space
to share, learn, and reflect.

- I'm Petrell.
- Nice to meet you!

- I'm Joey, nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you too, Joey.

I'm Siok.

- I'm Rai!
- Yeah.

We're gonna teach you
how to make dumplings.

Teach her, Petrell.

Okay.
First, wet your hand a little bit.

- Okay.
- That's it, yeah.

And then get one like this.

I've never made a dumpling before,
but it smelled so good.

Then I got so hungry.
I guess I was distracted from my nerves.

So, ladies, Raishel is a full-time mother.

She hasn't worked for many years now,

and she wants to be a good role model
to her two daughters.

I thought you could maybe share
a bit of experience about how when

you were housewives and decided
to go back into the workforce.

Oh, I would love to hear.

The Chinese ladies in my class,
they have the same issues as Raishel.

That's motherhood, work-life balance,

how to maintain and keep
your own identity and passions

when you're giving up so much
of yourself for your family.

My experience is,
I was very focused on career

- before I got married and having my son.
- Mm-hmm.

But I forgot myself during the ten years.

As a woman, as a mom,

we just give and forget
to give ourselves opportunities.

- I felt like I wanted to do more in life.
- Mm-hmm.

That's why I tried to re-learn
new skill set for me to go for my dreams.

It's hard, it's not easy,

but you want to show your children,

"Mommy can do it,
and you can do it even better!"

- We'll do it together.
- Yes.

In China, we say,

"Student surpasses the master."

You want your offspring,
the next generation, to outshine you.

Yes.

- To do that, you have to inspire them.
- Yes.

That's what I'm trying to do.

I just want to elevate my life
and inspire my children.

Joey's story especially connected with me

because we have parallel life experiences.

So, it really inspired me
to follow my dreams

and that it's never too late.

So it was not only like,
yes, this is possible,

but you have people who believe
in you and who support you.

So you can do it too.

Go for people who have
similar values as you, the friendship.

Then smack each other
if you're naughty or something.

That's what good friends are for.

That is a really good point.

You need a friend who
challenges you and pushes you.

Exactly.

My husband is supportive,
but he never pushes.

Like, "You're useless.
I need someone. I need help."

- Just like you said.
- Don't worry, Raishel.

If you feel you're not being pushed
by your husband, call me.

- I will push you.
- Thank you.

On that note...

Let's cheers with our tea!

Then let's go cook our dumplings.

- Let's cook some dumplings!
- Yes!

It was great meeting the ladies,
having them inviting me to dumplings,

and us sharing our experiences,

because even though we're all diverse,
they were all so similar.

We had lots of common themes
and it's East meets West.

There's definitely more in the world
that connects us and joins us,

especially as women, than divides us.

It was interesting to see that

all of our fears, joys,
and hopes are universal.

- These are Raishel's.
- All sticking together already.

- Sorry!
- It's okay!

So, there's something that I've prepared.

Oh my goodness!

And, Raishel, you are
one of the most positive

and bright and bubbly
and beautiful students

to ever walk through
the doors of my etiquette school.

Thank you so much.

You're a beacon of strength
to your husband, to your kids.

Most importantly, you're going
to be a beacon of strength to yourself.

- Give me a hug.
- Thank you so much.

You're gonna make your mother so proud.

And, uh, this is a little graduation gift.

Thank you so much. This is gorgeous.

Oh my gosh. I'm just over the moon.

And do you remember how to pronounce it?

Villeroy and Boch.

Very good! A round of applause.

Thank you. Thank you so much, Sara.

I'll cherish this every time
I use it and think of you.

Thank you for giving me my first step
because that's the biggest one.

I think from here on I can really soar
and that's all because of you.

I really appreciate it.

The gift that Sara gave
was so touching and moving.

Every time I use it,
I will think of her and her belief in me.

It just really makes me feel empowered
and supported and cared about.

Congratulations.

Thank you!

Raishel has graduated.
She's taken the first step of her journey

from desperate housewife
to confident career woman.

And now the rest is up to her.

Let's have some tea!

- To good health and happiness.
- Nice to meet you all.

So, today I'm going to go and volunteer

for a not-for-profit
which helps dress people

for their own interviews
and getting started with their careers.

Hi, I'm Rai.

Hello, I'm Victoria.

- Welcome to Groomed to Go.
- Thank you so much.

The last time I did this,
I was doing role-play with Sara.

But this time is going to be a real person
who's going for a real interview.

So, I really want to put all the skills
I've learned from Sara in play today.

- This is really nice. It could be flowy.
- Yeah.

And it also has this waist tie,
so it will really cinch.

Yeah, okay.

So I'm feeling confident and empowered.

And I'm happy to pass on

that empowered feeling
Sara gave me to this new client.

This looks good on you!

Okay. Yeah, you think?

I do!

Haley, you look amazing!

- You've done such a great job.
- Yeah!

I'm happy to be of service
and your smile is worth it all.

Aw, thank you.

Wow. It's really lovely.

Definitely coming here today
and successfully dressing Haley,

I really feel confident.

My kids will see me confident
and will feel proud of me.

Right, okay. So, one, two, one...

From your stomach, so it's like...

Can you do it?

Yeah, that's really good!

You did it while punching! Okay, great.

And I think I'm closer
to being that role model

and definitely fulfilling my goal
of being inspiring to my children.

- I love you.
- I love you too.

Can Kevin do kung fu too?