01x26 - United Plates of America

[bunniefuu]

We have another episode
of Dinner Time Live.

We have Adam Scott, Ken Marino.
Fantastic. Funny.

Adam, when we called him,
is all about all things Americana,

so we're gonna make a French dip sandwich,
a couple other things.

Ken said immediately
the food in New Orleans,

so I'm gonna do fish almondine
and maybe beignets,

and we'll see what happens.

And not to be a rat, but Adam also spent
a significant amount of that call

telling us how much he loves
your least favorite thing in the world,

Ants on a Log.

-I thought you were joking.
-No.

He spent a lot of time saying
how much he likes it

and why it's so good.

Well, uh...

I hate that dish, and I guess
this is gonna be a children's menu now,

-so, uh, we'll see what happens.
-[Chris] You'll have to address that.

Have a good service.

[theme music playing]

[inaudible dialogue]

[indistinct chatter]

Welcome back to Dinner Time Live.
I'm your host, Dave Chang.

This is Chris Ying.

-[Ken] Hey.
-Hello.

And we are joined with amazing guests.
Adam Scott. Ken Marino.

-[applause]
-[crew cheers]

[Dave] Um...

Two good friends. And, uh...

-[Ken] I don't know, "good."
-Just good.

Just fine. Mediocre friends.

-No. We work together.
-Eh...

-[Chris] Work associates.
-There you go. Thank you.

-Yeah, work associates.
-And when... This is hot.

-[Ken] Oh, there's my napkin.
-[Adam] What are you...?

-[Chris] Ooh, what's happening over here?
-[Ken] What do I do?

-Oh, my God. Okay, what's...?
-Oh, my gosh.

When, uh, we gave you guys a call
to see your interests...

[Adam] Yeah.

...Adam said he likes all kinds
of American classics,

which is why we started off
with deviled eggs,

which is as Americana as you can get.

I don't know if we made an assumption,
but you probably like a French dip,

-which is arguably...
-Yes.

...in the pantheon
of greatest American sandwiches.

-Yes.
-[Dave] I'm gonna let this rest in here.

Did you see that New York Times
article about French dip a week ago?

[Dave] I'm in L.A. now,
I don't read The New York Times.

-[Ken] The Old Gray Lady?
-[Adam] The Old Gray Lady.

[Dave] What did it say?

Well, they were talking about
the French dip at Houston's.

[Dave] Mmm!

-What'd they say?
-Nothing.

Just said, "French dip, Houston's."
That was the whole article.

-[Ken] The Times has really fallen off.
-Yeah, yeah.

Uh, no, they were talking about
how it's this thing,

people are lining up to get the French...

-Who doesn't like a French dip?
-[Dave] It's fantastic, right?

You have Philippe's here in L.A.,
but the one in Houston's delicious.

-That's gonna be the last savory course.
-[Adam] Great.

We spoke to Ken just before we went live
and you were like, "I like everything,"

but somehow we figured that...
You said you like the food of New Orleans.

I love New Orleans food.

-I love New Orleans.
-So, uh...

when you take out, say,
the food of the Creole and Cajun,

when I think about the food
of New Orleans, and I love it,

I think about, uh, the fish dishes
at Galatoire's, Brennan's.

Uh, usually it's drum or redfish,
but we have some fancy golden madai,

golden snapper from Japan,

and we're gonna dredge it,

and we're gonna make it
into a fish almondine

with lemon juice, clarified butter.

I made some fish fumet from the bones,

and I reduced it
into this, basically, syrup.

I wanna add that to that dish
in a little bit.

And then we're gonna go back
to New Orleans with, uh, beignets...

-Mm-hm.
-Oh, my goodness.

...inspired by Cafe Du Monde,
one of the must-visit places.

But the other thing,
and I think the crucial element here,

and I gave you a heads-up
that I was gonna make fun of this.

I have long made fun of what I think
is one of the worst culinary creations...

-[Adam] Careful.
-[laughter]

...in American history.

It's why I think America can't
have good things, nice things.

It's Ants on a Log.

-How dare you?
-I know. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Now, wait. Okay. So, what are your...?
Why do you hate Ants on a Log?

-[stammers] I joke...
-[Ken] There's this beautiful meat.

-[Adam] I know.
-This beautiful stock...

-Oh, yeah. There it is.
-There it is.

We almost titled this menu
the "Children's Menu."

'Cause this is what you'd get

-on children's plates.
-Thank you very, very much.

Can you give Adam the opportunity
to defend his preferred snack?

Can you stand up for Ants on a Log?

I think that Ants on a Log
is a nearly perfect snack

-because it's... healthy.
-[Dave] Careful.

It is delicious.

It's aesthetically pleasing.

And it gives you... It has protein,
it has fiber, and it gives you energy.

-What else has fiber? Metamucil.
-But here's the thing.

Here's one of the reasons
I covet Ants on a Log,

is because it's a pain in the a*s to make.

It's messy, and it's time-consuming.

'Cause you've got to get
the peanut butter inside the celery,

and then you've gotta put
the raisins on top of it,

stick them in there.

It's a pain in the a*s,
you get it all over the place.

It's not really worth the end product.

But if it's made for you,
it's a perfect snack.

But what about just, like...?

What about just, like, get a plate of...?
A dollop of peanut butter,

a little pile of raisins,

and then you take your celery,

-and you sort of dip it...
-Not the same thing.

...and then you put your raisin on
for every bite?

How many times do I have to say
it's not the same?

You said it three or four times,
but I would like to know why.

-[Chris] Dave doesn't even...
-I'm ignoring this conversation entirely.

No, but you know what it is?
It's like a story is being told.

Where are these ants going?

What log are they on? What's on one side?

They're going
from this side of the log to this side.

Know what they're doing?
They're trying to get away from you

-'cause you're gonna eat them.
-Yeah, but they can't.

-I got them now.
-They're stuck in the peanut butter.

[Ken] It's a tragic story for the ants.

I don't even know
how I've come across this article

'cause maybe I'm just,
you know, I believe my own fake news.

But somehow, and Chris knows
that I've long said this out loud,

that I found out that Ants on a Log
was created in Minneapolis or Minnesota,

one of the Twin Cities, in the '50s.

It was a marketing firm
that created Ants on a Log.

And only a marketing firm

that knows nothing
about cuisine or gastronomy

would put
three disparate elements together.

I don't buy that.

I think it was a grandma or a mom
or even a dad who was like:

"Oh, I gotta make something for the kids.
Uh, what's around?"

He grabbed the three things,
and he's like, "It's an ant on a log."

Yeah, well, that's how Caesar salad...

César Ritz came up
with a genius combination in Mexico City,

like, a hundred years ago.

This is not an example of delicious.

-I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
-Maybe it was the same guy.

-Is there honey in the salad?
-[Chris] It wasn't the same...

He had a great palate,
but I just can't get behind...

-Do you like it?
-[Ken] It's fine.

It's like a peanut butter
and jelly sandwich without bread.

It's like a peanut butter
and jelly sandwich with crunchy bread.

Dave doesn't even think
this is the best dish named after ants.

The best dish named after ants, right?

And I don't know
if it's culinary onomatopoeia.

-I don't even...
-[Chris laughs]

Food metaphors, right? Ants on a Log.

The best version of an ants dish
is called Ants on a Log

or Ants Climbing Up a Tree.

And that's from the Szechuan cuisine.

-You can tell more.
-It's called Ants Climbing a Tree.

He calls it culinary onomatopoeia,
which, incorrect,

but the ants in this case
are little flecks of ground pork,

the tree branches
are these cellophane noodles,

and they are scaling up
as you pull those noodles up,

and it is spicy and savory and tingly.

[Dave] It's got a little bit of heat,
a little Szechuan peppercorn in it.

It's a dish I love quite a bit,
and this is, to me,

if you're gonna do some kind
of ants food metaphor,

this is the best version of it.

Not easy to make but more delicious.

Would you say it's more complicated
to make than Ants on a Log?

I would rather strive
for a little bit more complicated...

[Ken] Let's think about that.

I don't know. Let me tell you what.

I haven't used tweezers
to plate something in some time.

-I did it for your Ants on a Log.
-See? It's a pain in the a*s.

-Don't say it's my Ants on a Log.
-[Chris] Don't associate Ken with this.

[Ken] Thank you so much.

-[Chris] But it doesn't end there.
-[Dave] No.

Are there more ants dishes?

No, I literally was screwing around
with this like, what, 90 minutes ago?

He found himself with a little extra time
as he was prepping.

[Dave] 'Cause I tasted it.

I had to...
I try to taste everything I make.

I wanted to make sure it was good.

And I haven't had one in years,
Ants on a Log.

And I almost, uh... I didn't feel good.

I didn't feel right eating it,
but I tasted it, I spit it out.

-You spit out Ants on a Log?
-It's not good.

-It's not good.
-Oh, thank you.

-Did you put honey on it?
-No, it's just peanut butter.

Just peanut butter?

Well, it's like, um...
Is it Jif peanut butter?

-[Dave] It is Jif.
-It's one of those.

[Adam] I gotta say, the best peanut butter
around is Trader Joe's peanut butter.

It's just peanuts and salt.
That's all it is.

[Dave] No, we can't get behind that.

So I wanted to make you guys...

There's something
a little like, um, sweet in there, yeah.

There's some sugar.
There's some Shaoxing wine.

-There's soy sauce.
-[Ken] This is delicious.

There's toban djan,
which is fermented chili paste.

[Chris] Mm-hmm.

-[Dave] Scallions, garlic, ginger.
-[blender whirring]

-And, uh...
-This is so good, David.

[blender stops]

[Dave] I made the sauce,
which I added to those vermicelli noodles.

And I wanted to do a merger.

I wanted to, again, make a dish

that combine what I like and what you like
and, uh, name it something else.

And I think this dish,
I'm gonna take the best elements.

We're still gonna keep it vegetarian.
I think it's pretty easy to make.

So I took some of the celery,

and I, uh, used a peeler,
and I just made strips like noodles.

So this is to recreate some of the noodle

that you get
in the actual Ants Climbing Up a Tree.

I took the sauce, and I put
some peanut butter and the raisins.

Incredible.

And I'm gonna sauté this all together.

And I think this is gonna be
a more delicious version...

-Of Ants on a Log.
-Of Ants on a Log.

And it's gonna be called,
like, Ants in your Pants.

-Love it.
-Or Ants Reaching Across the Aisle.

I don't know.

I gotta say, already,
Ants Climbing Up a Tree

is a thousand times more delicious
than Ants on a Log.

That looks like a nest.
How about "Ants in a Nest"?

[Chris] Ants' Nest. Very good.

-[Ken] Ants' Nest.
-[Dave] Ants' Nest.

-[Chris] Ants in the Branches.
-That actually sounds scary.

[laughs]

[Adam] I don't like being scared.

-[Ken] You don't like being scared eating?
-[Adam] No.

Uh, boo.

[Adam] Okay, now I'm scared.

So, again, I just pureed the raisins,

some of that spicy, sweet mala sauce.

[Adam] So you put raisins, peanut butter,
and a few other things in this sauce?

Uh, Dave, the Internet is wondering,
with all this ants talk,

where you stand on actual insects
and dishes made with real insects.

Really? We have to go there?

-So my good...
-[Adam] Good source of protein, right?

My good friends... It is.

My good friends Alex Atala
and René Redzepi,

they were instrumental
in putting ants on actual dishes.

And when you eat one,
at least the variety that they use,

it has a lemongrass-like flavor.

-[Ken] Yeah.
-[Adam] Huh.

I've tried it once, and it's not
something I want to eat again,

but I appreciate the idea of it.

It's just... I have a hard time
eating crickets and ants.

-I've eaten a bunch of crickets and ants.
-You have?

-[Chris] A bunch?
-Yeah.

-What qualifies as a bunch, Ken?
-Like a handful.

-[Chris] Oh, my goodness. That's a bunch!
-Like how?

[Adam] Alive?

I was in a Mexican restaurant
in New York and the guy was like:

"Do you wanna try some bugs?"

And I was like,
"Yeah, I wanna try some bugs."

And so I was eating food at the bar
and then he would be like...

He would give me like a little tray
of, like, grasshoppers and then ants,

and I was popping those in my mouth.

-[Chris] The verdict? How did you feel?
-Huh?

You know... [stammers]

they're so small.

It's hard to get a flavor.

Like, it's hard to get
like a real feeling about it, like...

But I'm all for, like, making dishes
with them. Why not?

Well, grasshoppers are
apparently a great source...

-[Dave] Source of protein. Uh...
-[Adam] Yeah.

Like, if you made a grasshopper burger,
and there was a lot of good in that,

and they're like, "Oh, there's grasshopper
in that," it wouldn't stop me from it.

-[Adam] Hmm.
-I wouldn't choose to eat it.

I want to appreciate it,
it's a beautiful idea.

It's very popular in Oaxacan cuisine.

Yeah. Chapulines, yeah.

I've had it a few times,
but it's not something like...

At someone's house, if they served it
to me, I'd eat it with delight.

-But it's not something I want to...
-[Ken] No. Who does?

But as we move into the future,
you know, towards a dystopian future,

the world's ending,
and we all have to eat bugs,

-that's when it's gonna be great.
-That's nice.

-That's real nice.
-Uh...

-Can I stop looking at this?
-Yes. Here.

-Thank you.
-Can I continue looking?

I don't know how this is not
a version of the dystopian future.

Yeah, Adam, I will say in your defense
that you have some allies

who are standing up for Ants on a Log.

-You're not alone.
-[Adam] Thank you.

Especially if the world ended, we'd be
more than happy with Ants on a Log.

Let me guess,
they're Parks and Recreation fans.

-[laughter]
-Maybe. Maybe not. Who cares?

-[Ken] What do we got now?
-User "conesofdunshire" is a big fan of...

-[Adam] There you go.
-[Chris] ...Ants on a Log.

-They know what they're talking about.
-Sorry. No, they don't.

So usually, on your show,
you give gigantic plates of food,

and by the time we get to... What is this?

By the time we get to the second dish,
everybody's full, right?

Well, you know, we keep tabs
of the people that do a good job eating.

-[Ken] Uh-huh.
-[Dave] Um...

You'd be surprised at some of our guests
that have consumed every calorie

-that's been put in front of them.
-Right.

Nobody's judging you, but they are.

Ken and I both had seconds
of the Ants Crawling up the Tree.

-Absolutely delicious.
-Ants Climbing a Tree, right?

-[Chris] Yeah. Ants Climbing a Tree.
-How do you prepare this?

-So it's pork, right?
-[Dave] Right.

So, again, I've actually never
made it before until today. Um...

So I took some doubanjiang,
some garlic, ginger,

pureed it with some Shaoxing wine,
soy sauce, sugar.

Uh... What else? Szechuan peppercorns,
blitzed it with some water.

Uh... And I just sort of set that aside.
And then I grilled...

-I sautéed the pork.
-Right.

Uh, and then I added some scallions,
then I took...

-[Ken] Into the pork?
-Yes.

-Okay.
-And then I added this.

This is the broth that I made,
the flavoring liquid.

-[Ken] May I?
-Please.

-[Adam] Drink that whole thing.
-Can I drink it?

[Dave] You shouldn't. You can taste it.

-Can I taste it?
-[Dave] Sure.

And this is Ants in your Pants.

[Adam] Ants in your Pants.

So I, again, basically just merged
the two dishes, uh, without the pork,

wanted to keep it something
that everyone could eat.

-[Adam] Thank you, David.
-[Ken] This is great.

How's Adam doing so far?

[Dave] I thought he'd be a bit more upset
about me talking so negatively about...

-Listen...
-So good reviews?

-[Dave] Yeah, good reviews.
-For those of us in the world

who are fans of Ants on a Log,
we're used to it, man.

[laughter]

-We are bulletproof, okay?
-Yeah, yeah.

This is delicious.

Rolls off your back like Ants on a Log.

I'm fine.

This is so good.

[Dave] It's very refreshing.

[Adam] It really is.

It's sweet. It's spicy.
It's got salt, umami...

Wait a second.

-What?
-Awesome.

-Not bad, right?
-So good.

It literally was not even gonna be
on the show until about 90 minutes ago.

David Chang just invented this dish.

[Dave] I did.

And shaving the, um...

-Um, what is this?
-Celery.

The celery makes it less chewy.

Well, originally, when I was
gonna make the dish, right?

Like, sometimes you peel the celery,
at least in kitchens that I've worked in,

because if it has a brown spot,

it could be,
you know, just freshly harvested.

But you peel it
to sort of get the blemishes off.

-[Ken] Yeah.
-And one of the pieces of celery

that I was using to prepare
your Ants on a Log,

I was like, "Oh, maybe I should
just continue peeling that

and use that as noodles because
Ants Climbing up a Tree are noodles."

And I sort of merged
the two dishes together.

This is why you're a g*dd*mn artist.

[Adam] That's right.

-[Dave] You said it.
-No, my words, not yours.

You don't have to say it.

Like, you or I, we'd take a celery
and if it had a blemish, what would we do?

-Throw it away.
-Garbage. Or just eat it and not care.

Would you eat a blemished, uh...?

You don't seem like the type of guy
who would eat a bruised celery.

Six days out of the week,
I'd eat a bruised piece of celery.

-Really?
-Seventh day, no way.

-Sunday?
-Sunday.

-Sunday, no way.
-Sunday's a day of non-brown.

It's a day of celery rest.

[Ken] Mm-hmm. [laughs]

[Chris] What is the texture
of those celery noodles? Crunchy?

[Adam] It is crunchy.

But it feels...
It's noodle-ish, noodle-esque.

Right? Noodle adjacent.

And it doesn't have that...
You know, you're not getting as...

Sometimes when you eat celery,
there's those little stringy...

Stringy, yeah.

So what I did, is if you put celery
in cold water, it firms up quite a bit.

-[Adam] I see.
-Yeah.

Same thing with a lot of things,
if you put it in cold water, it firms up.

[laughter]

I know for a fact if I tried making that,
it would get soggy and terrible.

-[Dave] Um...
-What did you say?

[laughter]

-You're gonna have to watch the show.
-I tune him out.

How long have you guys known each other?

-Like ten, 15 minutes?
-Yeah. At least...

We met here.

-[Dave] First date.
-Yeah.

Yeah. On Party Down, we never met.
Always in different scenes.

[Adam] Stayed, just kept our distance
and never ended up meeting.

Just one of those things. Um...

We met before Party Down.

Oh, we... I met you...

Well, I mean, I remember...

[stammers]

Oh, okay. I think I know exactly when.

It was Halloween 2001, I believe,
at Rob's Halloween party.

Well, that was definitely early
in us hanging out, uh, or meeting.

You came to my house.

When you came to my house,
the day I met Erica,

-that was later. Yeah.
-Later.

Yeah. At Rob's, uh, Halloween party.

Yeah, in 2001.

[Chris] The Rob that you were
alluding to is Rob Zombie?

[Adam] Rob Zombie, creator of Party Down.

Robert Downey Jr.

-Robert...
-Rob... Rob Thomas.

People don't know this.

Party Down, created by Rob Zombie,
Robert Downey Jr., and, uh, Robert...

Who's the guy...? The guy that m*rder*d...?

Oh, who m*rder*d somebody?

[Adam] No. Robert, uh...
The guy they made the HBO documentary.

-[Dave] Robert Durst.
-[Adam] Robert Durst.

Robert Durst,
Robert Downey Jr., Rob Zombie.

I don't know if you guys are
telling the truth. Do you know?

No. It's Rob Thomas.

Not the musician but another guy named
Rob Thomas created Party Down.

We're doing a bit about the other...

You would've been way cooler
if it was Rob Zombie.

[Adam] A pretty potent combination,
those three Robs.

[Ken] But we're not cool.

[Dave] Most people would think
you are pretty f*cking cool.

-You said it!
-[laughter]

Does Ken keep tricking you
into saying things?

-[Chris] Mr. Chang, what are you up to?
-So I took the snapper

and I dredged it in a little cornstarch.

I would have preferred Wondra flour,
but I couldn't find it.

-What flour?
-Wondra flour is a deionized flour.

So you take flour and water, cook it out,
and then they pulverize it again,

turn it back into flour,
and it becomes non-staticky,

so it doesn't stick together.

So it's great for making gravies.
It's great for dusting fish.

But, uh, I think
Uncle Ted didn't give us the budget

to buy Wondra flour today.

So this flour doesn't, like,
clump up, is what you're saying?

You don't need it.

I would've preferred it today,
but I couldn't find it,

and I'm sure it's in our pantry.

[laughter]

-[Adam] Who has the time?
-I'm all about arm's-reach cooking.

That's very... Whoa, you're drinking it!

Every once in a while,
a little nip, a little hit, you know?

-Got a lot of flavor.
-[Dave] Impressive.

-Impressive.
-Got a lot of flavor.

So, wait, now, when you put that in there...

was the oil hot?

[Dave] It's actually butter.
It's clarified butter.

-[Ken] Was the butter hot?
-[Dave] Uh, it was. It was.

I'll be honest, it could have been hotter.
It could have been hotter.

So, again, if this was a...

People are reviewing my technique,
they'd be like...

[Ken] I didn't mean to call you out,
I just...

-You did. You were trying to.
-No.

I was like, "There's a technique
of like throwing it in butter."

David, David.

-I'm so sorry.
-[laughter]

This f*cking guy.

-Like...
-I'm very excited.

-I don't know. It's okay.
-I'm excited.

His... Passive-aggressive
doesn't even begin to...

Listen, I struggle with imposter syndrome.
And, Ken, you're just outing me.

-So thank you.
-Well, listen. Listen.

If not me, then who?

Ken, you have to stop humiliating David.

[Dave] Please.

Now, this is a fish from Japan.

-Yeah. I mean, it smells delicious.
-[Dave] They put the picture-in-picture.

It's a beautiful fish,
and now it's just a hunk of flesh.

[Ken] But so... What, a redfish from Japan?

-It's a snapper, yeah.
-[Ken] It's a snapper.

We got it from The Joint,
and it's gonna be delicious.

And usually, uh, it's with drum, which is,
again, a local fish of Louisiana,

and redfish, which is another fun fish
to catch itself.

-[Ken] Mm-hmm.
-But this is... Couldn't get those.

I got something different,
but it's gonna be delicious.

I have a question.

Is snapper traditionally
what they make po' boys out of?

-[Ken] Catfish.
-[Adam] Catfish.

-Usually, right? No?
-Correct.

-Really?
-Catfish po' boys. A lot of catfish.

But like Dave said, a lot of gulf fish,
generally, drum, redfish.

But I don't eat a fish po'boy.
I... [stammers] Half and half.

-I have oysters and shrimp.
-[Adam] Uh-huh.

Yeah, that's correct.

I was hoping Dave was gonna jump in.

-Wait, no.
-[Adam] Oysters and shrimp in bread.

-That's your po' boy?
-Yeah. Half and half...

How much time do you spend in New Orleans?

I've been there
at least 20 times, minimum.

-You film a lot of stuff there?
-[Ken] I just have a friend there.

-I've never filmed there.
-[Adam] That's mysterious.

-[Ken] No.
-[Adam] Why isn't he telling us who it is?

I will, with a simple follow-up question.

No, I feel like it was implied
that we all wanted to know.

I have a girlfriend in Canada.

-You refused to tell us who it was.
-[laughter]

No, but you go down there a lot?

I go down there an enormous amount.

When was the last time you were there?

Uh, I just went down there...

um...

-three months ago.
-Okay.

[Chris] That is an enormous amount.

No, I've been there over 20 times.

So, what are your sort of
New Orleans-food greatest hits?

What do you go down and eat?

I mean, you know, you get...

Well, my buddy,
who lives down there, is a chef.

[Dave] Whoa, whoa, whoa.

-[Chris] Getting closer to something.
-[Dave] Who's this buddy?

He worked for the Brennan's.
His name is Chip Flanagan.

-Um, he was a...
-[Dave] Casual name drop? Chip?

-Maybe...
-[Dave] I don't know Chip.

He worked at Ralph's on the Park.
You ever been?

I have not. Have you been? Anybody?

-Where's Ralph's on the Park?
-It's on the park.

[laughter]

-What's the name of the guy that owns it?
-Uh, Ralph. Yeah.

I should've said somebody else.
Uh, anyway, he, um...

Uh, he... He...

[Dave] Chip is looking at this right now,
if he's watching live,

he's like, "What the hell is Chang doing?"

But he's not there anymore.
He wasn't... He, uh...

He... He's a chef.

I met him in college, and he, um...

And so I go down there,
and because he's a chef

and he's worked down there
for a long time,

uh, we go to restaurants
and eat all sorts of types of food.

But, you know, you go down there,

you gotta get po' boys, gotta get gumbo,

-get étouffée, and all that stuff.
-Oh, man.

But it's more about
whatever they're cooking.

-It's incredible food.
-Yeah, it's the best.

Um...

-Was that grapefruit you put in there?
-Wasn't grapefruit. It's lemon.

Uh, the French term is suprême.

When you suprême a citrus fruit,

that's when you get the wedges
without the membrane on the sides.

That's tedious. Is that the right word?

It's a normal day on the job
for most cooks.

-[Ken] It takes a while.
-[Dave] It doesn't take a while.

-It's just a pain in the a*s.
-[Ken] It's annoying.

[Adam] Like making Ants on a Log. It's...

I gotta say, first time I tried
to make Ants on a Log,

'cause I've never made it,
I was like, "This is hard to make."

-Yeah, I know.
-[Chris laughs]

[Chris] It was...

Can I ask a question about your process
of making the Ants on a Log?

Did you spoon?

Or did you use a knife
to scoop out the peanut butter?

-And did you go sideways?
-We piped it in.

-You piped it in?
-Yeah.

-[Adam] Like, with a pastry thing?
-[Dave] Correct.

-That's smart.
-Piped it in? That's sh*t...

So one thing that probably
is not done in a traditional fashion

is to add a reduction of a fish stock.

So I took the bones of that snapper, and...

-[Ken] That's what you do with it.
-[Dave] It shouldn't be that hot.

-[Adam] You poured it on... Mm-hmm.
-[Dave] I reduced it down into a syrup.

And it's just straight fish.

-It's like the essence of that fish.
-[Chris] Thoughts, Ken?

Absolutely delicious.
I'm about to drink it.

What are your thoughts on the idea
that there's a lot of criticism

when people eat fish
and it's like, "It's so fishy."

-I'm like, "It's a fish."
-Yeah, yeah.

-I gotta...
-[Adam] Why is that?

Why do people do... Like sushi,

if sushi is fishy,
that means it's not fresh?

Usually, it's a white, oily fish,
like a kohada, sardine, or a mackerel.

That's that smell and it's the oily thing.

Can I tell you a story?
It's related to what you said.

I went to Greece with my friend

many years ago when I was doing The State.
Remember The State?

-Yeah, the show The State.
-Thank you, sir.

-[applause]
-[crew cheers]

[Adam] Ken Marino.

The youngsters may not know
what The State is.

-What's that?
-Can you describe what The State is?

The State was a sketch comedy show
on MTV in the '90s.

Uh, and I was lucky to be a part of it.

And between seasons, we went to Greece.

-And I was with my buddy, Joe.
-Lo Truglio?

No, a different Joe, actually.

But Joe was there.
He wasn't at this restaurant.

And we went to a restaurant,
and the waiter came over,

and he described a fish dish.

-It was a special.
-Yeah.

And he had a Greek accent
'cause he was from Greece.

Or he didn't have an accent.
We had the accents...

And I said, uh...

-"Is the fish, um, is it fishy?"
-[Adam] Uh-huh.

And he took a minute, and he looked at me,
and he went, "Of course."

-Yeah.
-[laughter]

It was that moment I was like,
"What a stupid... That's the stupidest..."

-It's a very American thing.
-Why wouldn't fish be fishy?

-Is the meat meaty?
-Yeah.

-Nobody says, "Is the meat meaty?"
-Is the meat meaty?

I think we should declare
to all Americans,

never, ever describe fish
as fishy ever again.

-[Ken] No, no.
-[Dave] But I think in their defense...

sometimes, if you get...
We talked about it last episode,

you get a piece of fish
that is not handled properly,

it might taste like ammonia.

I don't think that's what
I'm talking about either.

I think people in general... Not people.

There are some people
that don't like the flavor of...

uh, again, oily fish, like mackerel.

-Do you guys like mackerel?
-Yeah.

It's one of my most favorite.

-[Ken] Anchovies.
-[Adam] I love sardines too.

God, you guys, I'm so proud of you.

[Chris] Those oily fish are like
a gamier meat would be like,

like grass-fed beef would be, right?

It's like smoking a cigar,
or drinking a Scotch,

or just it's like in a...

You have to go...

Or, like, smoking a cigar
that's just filled with sardines.

-That's what I meant, a sardine cigar.
-Yeah.

[Adam] Just delicious.

-Oh, my God, this looks so good.
-[Chris] Holy cow.

-[Dave] This...
-[Ken] I feel like there's butter in this.

-[Dave] A lot of butter.
-[Ken grunts]

I gotta be honest too.

I haven't made clarified butter
in over 20 years.

-It's not...
-[Adam] And that's what you did here?

[Dave] Yes. It's basically ghee.

And when you clarify, you take the...

You basically heat up butter,
and you separate the milk solids,

you skim that off,
and what you're left with is the pure fat.

It has a really wonderful...

It's wonderful to cook with
at high temperature,

so you can cook with it
without it burning.

But I worked at a restaurant
where I would have to make...

We'd have to make
20 pounds of it every day,

and the smell of it does not
sit well with me.

-[Adam] Right.
-Does it smell fishy?

[laughter]

-Did it bring you back there today?
-[Dave] Oh, yeah.

I'm like, "I'm making it for you guys,

but it's not something
I'm so excited to cook with."

The smell of ghee is not something...

Ghee is not something you like to cook.
Clarified butter, you don't like.

I like clarified butter.
It's the smell. It smells...

I don't know, smells like...
What does it smell like, Chris?

Uh, movie theater popcorn.

No, movie theater popcorn,
in its artificial essence, is amazing.

-This is not.
-[Chris laughs]

You know, I worked... I made taffy at the
Santa Cruz Beach Boardwalk as a teenager.

That was my job.

And so I would, from scratch,
make these vats of saltwater taffy.

So I would have
to just take corn syrup and sugar,

and cook it over a hot stove, um...

with these giant tubs
of either watermelon flavoring,

or, you know, whatever,
caramel flavor, whatever it was.

So for like 20 years,
after working there as a teenager,

I couldn't eat any of those, like,
candies 'cause that smell is...

-[Dave] Right?
-It's...

Like, I would go home
and smell like watermelon candy for...

-I'm sorry, I have to try this.
-Please.

Then you'd immediately
make Ants on the Log.

[Adam] The craziest thing was,
when it happened,

I had no idea
it would make such a great story.

Oh, my God. From the beginning
to the middle of it, to the very end...

-I could tell.
-...it was just a journey.

Like a roller coaster.
It was like I was at the carnival.

I was on a roller coaster.

People at home can't tell,
but everybody was going f*cking crazy.

We were on the edge of our seats
when you said watermelon and the smell...

Watermelon flavoring.
And then I brought it back.

I said watermelon flavoring again

'cause I thought
maybe people didn't really get it.

It's like you show the g*n
in the first act,

-then you talk about the watermelon.
-[Chris] An incredible callback.

[Adam] It's great. You know what I'll do?

-I'll tell the story before the hour's up.
-No, no, no.

I'll do it, I'll do it. It's fine.
It's fine. I'll do it.

This is delicious.
What do you think of it?

I had to taste it because, number one,
I was like, "I hope it's cooked through,"

'cause I'd have let it rest a bit longer.

I think one of the biggest problems
when people cook fish at home

and when they think it's difficult,
'cause it is difficult to cook fish,

is they don't let it rest.

One of the issues when we're
cooking live is letting things rest.

This is something I let rest
'cause I cooked it at 400.

I seared it off, and I put it in
at around 3:00, and I let it rest.

But I didn't have enough time,

so I was trying to buy some time
and hoping that it was cooked through.

That's all I wanted to check.

'Cause if it wasn't,
I'd have let everyone know,

and I wanted to beat myself up
before you made fun of me.

[Ken] I would never!

David, this is so good.

And those almonds are delicious.

That, like, crunch
that the almonds provide.

-The texture...
-[Adam] What is wrong with me?

The texture of the dish...

-Thank you, Ken.
-...is delicious.

Um, I am very happy that that is...

as delicious as I hoped it was
going to be, if that made sense.

-It's so good.
-It's delicious.

-You know what's great is the...
-[Ken] Company.

-...texture of the almonds. You know?
-[laughter]

-[Chris] Almost has a watermelon flavor.
-The crunch of the almonds.

Did I ever tell you,
when I worked at the Santa Cruz...

Oh, tell them about
the watermelon, though.

I had to make saltwater taffy.

It was, like, a craft, every day.

Do you feel a kinship now
if you see a saltwater taffy maker?

You're walking by and see them,

-are you like, "I know your pain"?
-[Dave] No.

What exactly is taffy?
What's a taffy? Other than sugar?

It's corn syrup, sugar, and flavoring.

And love. Don't forget the love.

Okay, thank you. A little bit of love.

A bit of love, I have to admit.

Sometimes, a little spit
when you were angry at people.

-Sure, you gotta spit.
-That was disgusting, sorry.

-Nobody ever does that in...
-We do here.

Oh! That's what that was!

-This is so good.
-[Dave] Um...

I'm happy. Really happy.
This is a great dish.

It's actually... Seems difficult.

You can make this and you don't...
You don't have to use clarified butter.

You could use milk solids.
I'm not a fan of always making...

Even if you make a hollandaise sauce,

I like using the milk solids in it
without separating it.

But you don't need to make
the fish stock and reduce it down.

It's gonna be delicious
with just the fat of the butter

and the acidity from the lemon.

These are the times
when parsley makes sense.

The lemon is amazing.

-[Adam] Oh, and those almonds.
-Are you back to the almonds?

But, like, the skin,
look at this red skin here.

Look at that. That's great.

And that's tasty.

I guarantee if I made this,
or tried to make it...

-[Ken] It wouldn't be as good?
-[Adam] No.

-[Adam] You gonna take the bet on that?
-Yeah.

No, I'm not. No, absolutely not. No.
I think you're right.

I think that if I win... If I tried to act,
wouldn't it be terrible?

-[laughter]
-[Adam] I disagree.

No, really, I'm a horrible actor.

-[Adam] Have you tried, David?
-Unfortunately, yes.

[Ken] Really? When and what?

-I was in a...
-[Chris] You guys are co-stars, Adam.

-You guys were in the same...
-Oh, that's right, we are in Loot.

-[laughter]
-[Chris] Co-stars, man. Come on.

But to his credit,
we've never seen each other on set.

-We weren't there at the same time.
-I've worked with him on many things.

We've never seen each other.
He doesn't look at his co-stars.

I don't know if you've noticed, I have
not made eye contact with either of you.

I look right here on every person.

He makes friends with the ants.
He's just looking at these ants.

-I name them.
-What are their names?

-[Adam] Charles, Doug, Freeborn.
-[Dave] Freeborn?

It took three to get to Freeborn.

He ran out of names
that's not really a name.

-[Dave] Freeborn.
-[Adam] And then I ran out.

-And then... [makes crunching sound]
-There's nothing.

-Static. [makes beeping noise]
-Absolutely nothing.

[laughter]

[Chris] Dave, what are you doing
to that rib roast?

I am slicing it up,
and I'm taking the cap off. Um...

-What is the cap?
-This is the spinalis dorsi, right?

[Chris] Yes.

Live TV, my brain froze. I'm like, f*ck.

Is it like the tastiest part
of the, uh, thing?

This is what they call the chef's cut,
which means I eat it and you guys don't.

[laughter]

-No, I'll give you some.
-[Ken] Give me a little.

[Adam] Why do you think
it's the best part?

-[Ken] Fat?
-Um, it has... Ken knows what's up.

It has the best composition
of fat, sinew, and beef.

People don't realize
that fat equals flavor,

but you also need other elements.

'Cause while I'm not the biggest fan of,
say, filet mignon

-because there's no... It's just bland.
-[Adam] Yeah.

Which is why you need
a buttery sauce to give it flavor.

-Ribeye!
-[Dave] There you go.

-And this is ribeye.
-Oh, my God.

-You like steak, you're a big steak guy.
-Yeah. What are you talking about?

I feel like I've been to a steak place
with you and you've gushed about steak.

-That was before we met.
-That was before we met 15 minutes ago.

[Adam] This is, um...

Now, when you say sinew, what is that?

Those are the muscle fibers, the tendons,

the things that are
not normally delicious.

Uh, but this is a longer roast,
and I don't know, you want...

-[Adam] It softens them up?
-Yeah, you want chew.

-You want things that give it texture.
-[Adam] Uh-huh.

That's why I feel like a ribeye...
Sometimes it has too much fat.

This is... All I did was salt, pepper,

sear it off, uh,
pretty hard in a cast-iron skillet,

so it had a nice...

-[Ken] That's just salt and pepper?
-Right.

I was gonna ask what you cooked it with.
It's incredible.

-[Chris laughs]
-Oh!

[Adam] Show me the move you just did.
I missed it. Oh, yeah.

-That's his signature Ken move.
-That means I really like it.

I don't know how you guys like your steak,
but I'll cook this medium rare,

and I don't care if you guys want it
any other temperature

-'cause you're not gonna get it.
-[Adam] No.

-It's so good.
-Wait. So, what part of the cow is that?

The ribeye. This is ribeye.

-That's ribeye?
-Yeah.

It's a three-bone ribeye.

-[Adam] I love the crunchy little bits.
-[Chris] It's a prime rib, right?

Wait, so prime rib and ribeye
are from the same area?

The steaks off
of the prime rib are ribeye.

The actual muscle number,
so if you order it in a beef catalog,

the way it's categorized is literally
called the 109, the number.

If you're at a restaurant
and you're trying to order some,

say, this cut of meat, you're like, hey,
Bob, can I get a 109 dry-aged 60 days?

And a big thing will show up.
And you get the caps.

And the whole thing's delicious.
But you want to get the spinalis.

-Right. And how is Bob?
-[Dave] Bob's doing great.

Doing all right?

[Chris] Hey, Freeborn, I need to order
some steaks from you.

Can I get Bob's number?

-[Dave] Um, here.
-[Adam] Yes, please.

-Thank you so much.
-[Ken] Mm-hmm.

[Adam] Dude.

[Chris] What you were building here
is the French dip, right?

[Dave] Correct.
I think I burned the bread.

[Chris laughs]

-[Chris] Oh, look at that.
-No, sir.

No, it's perfect.

You guys are very kind to me.
You guys are the best we've ever had.

-We're doing French dip.
-Making French dip.

-Is that what we're dipping it in?
-Correct.

-Oh, my goodness.
-[Ken] You took away the fish.

So, uh, this is like a blend,
this is a cuvée of an older one

that we made last week
with some chuck roast.

And, uh, when we did a test run of this,

I took some of these bones
and I added a mirepoix of burnt onions

'cause I wanted to get that color.

When you get French onion soup,

a lot of that flavor comes
from burning the onions itself.

And, uh, onions, garlic,
that's what the French call mirepoix.

Um...

Parsley stems, thyme.
What else did I add in there?

-[Chris] Uh...
-[Dave] A little beef bouillon.

[Ken] What is this?

There's onions, celery, and, um, carrots.

-What is that called?
-Mirepoix.

And then in New Orleans, there's...

It's the Holy Trinity,
which is bell pepper, carrots...

No, bell pepper, onions, carrots.

-[Chris] Onions, carrots, bell peppers.
-[Ken] Is it?

-The Holy Trinity has carrots?
-Onions, bell peppers, celery.

[Ken] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I only know that
'cause I grew up watching Emeril.

I'd be like, the Holy Trinity!
I love you, Emeril.

Uh, what is the salt you use?
What do you use?

-[Ken] His salt, right? Your salt.
-[Dave] Mm-mm.

Emeril's salt.

The reason why I'm not using the Momo
seasoned salt is because I just...

-I forgot.
-[laughter]

Yeah, but this is delicious.

-This is Maldon. This is from England.
-Okay.

-My wife gets that.
-Maldon is a fantastic salt.

Uh, salt has different flavors
around the world.

I feel like we talked about this recently,
but it only tastes like salt.

So if Fleur de Sel,
which is one of my favorite salts,

had different textures,
I would prefer to use that,

but it's also crazy expensive.

Which one would you like to...?

Fleur de Sel or Sel Gris,
which is gray salt. Um...

Why would you use that?

I love the crunch of it,
but a lot of people don't like the crunch.

[Adam] I like the crunch.

Sometimes people use it in a grinder
and it gets very fine, but...

Um...

[Chris] Dave, you were saying
when we started

that the French dip may be the greatest
sandwich ever produced in America.

[Dave] It is.

What else is on
that sandwich Mount Rushmore?

[Adam] Oh, man, look at that.

[Dave] Uh...

-I think the pastrami sandwich.
-[Adam] Yeah.

I would also say the BLT.

-[Adam] Yeah.
-I would also say...

-What else?
-Does the po' boy crack that list?

[Ken] Yeah.

[Dave] I love Domilise's in New Orleans,
one of my favorite places.

Po' boys to me are hit-and-miss.

Yes, but a good po' boy is on there.

The good ones.
Is there any way you'll say that...?

A bad, uh, French...?

But it's not in my personal top five.
No disrespect.

All I do is piss off
the city of New Orleans.

-It's not my favorite.
-Your top five is BLT, French dip.

Pastrami, either from Katz's or Langer's.

Probably my number one sandwich.

-What was that one?
-Katz's or Langer's.

-Katz's in New York.
-[Ken] Yeah.

Um...

Or Langer's here in L.A. Langer's 19.

-Oh, that's very hot on my hand.
-I bet.

[laughter]

[Chris] The boiling liquid is hot
in your hand.

-Nineteen is the one that you order.
-Coleslaw. Yes.

Do you have a high tolerance for burns
and stuff on your fingers and hands?

[Dave] I... I don't.

I just like... I act.
This is where I'm an actor.

That hurt a tremendous amount.

What I really want to do is,
like, f*ck! Ah!

But I can't. Then I don't look
like I know what I'm doing.

I've noticed Gordon Ramsay being like,
"Hand me the pan."

He just picks up a pan.
People are like, "Jesus."

You're just used to it.

[Dave] Gordon spends a lot of money
on special effects.

[laughter]

I thought you were gonna say,
"On bionic hands."

I thought that was gonna get
a better laugh.

Let me say it again.

I thought you were gonna say,
"On bionic hands."

[exaggerated laughter]

That was good.

-Taffy.
-Ooh, ooh, ooh.

Adam and Ken,
what are your top three sandwiches?

My favorite, I think,
is peanut butter and raisin sandwich.

[laughter]

-Just kidding.
-[Chris] Watermelon taffy.

-What do you think?
-Well, just for the record,

a good peanut butter
and jelly sandwich is fantastic.

-Right.
-It's comforting. It's great.

-But is it in your top five?
-[Ken] No.

[Adam] What's the jelly you use or jam?

-I try to get like a fancier one that...
-Sure. A tall jar.

No, it's handwritten.

Like they're like "jelly"
and it's like somebody wrote it.

They didn't print it out. They used every...

It's actually like Knudsen
or something other company?

Uh, but did you go like raspberry
or strawberry or blueberry?

Like, what's your go-to?

I kind of lean towards raspberry.

-I like blueberry and strawberry as well.
-That's not even an answer.

[Chris laughs]

It was a long answer
with no real commitment.

-That's right.
-Um...

-Have we covered all the great sandwiches?
-No.

[Adam] So your favorite sandwich.

-[Chris] Does the lobster roll make it?
-That's not a sandwich.

-[Dave] Only Connecticut-style.
-What's a monster roll?

-It's not a sandwich.
-[Chris] A lobster. [laughs]

-Only Connecticut-style.
-Is a hot dog a sandwich?

[Dave] No, we're not getting into this.
Semantics here.

[Ken] A lobster roll is not a sandwich.

-Not a cheeseburger, right?
-[Chris] It's a sandwich.

No, a lobster roll is a seafood hot dog.

[Chris] You're saying
a lobster roll is a hot dog?

A lobster roll is served on a hot dog...
It's like a seafood...

-It's funny.
-It's like a seafood hot dog.

I don't consider a fried chicken sandwich
as part of the sandwich.

I don't consider a lobster roll
as part of the sandwich.

[Chris] Fair. Okay.

I don't know why.

I can't take them without being medicated.

Can I have a little...? Yes, a red,
please. Yeah, thank you so much.

"It's like a seafood hot dog."
Everyone's like, "What?"

You're like,
"No, it's like a seafood hot dog."

-[Dave] There you go.
-The same thing. Thank you, David.

I was hoping
everybody would catch up to me.

I didn't cut this in half
because there's something about...

-[Adam] Love it.
-You gotta dip into it.

-Love.
-You have your au jus, which is...

-[Adam] Horseradish?
-[Dave] Yeah, horseradish.

All that is is, uh, sour cream,
horseradish, some salt.

[Adam] Oh, my God. Yeah, okay.

[Ken] Sour cream, horseradish.
Fresh horseradish?

[Dave] No. Canned.

-Not canned. Jarred.
-[Chris] Jarred.

Then we dip it in
this bad boy over here, right?

-I'm still eating my fish.
-You're still on the fish?

I've been talking a lot.

I've been making some funnies.

This is... This is... I haven't had dinner
with Ken in a while. This is right.

He's like, he goes at his own pace.
He's just enjoying himself.

This is a two-hour show, right?
What happened?

-No. God...
-The smoker is a smoker?

No, I have a chunk of beef stuck
in my throat.

[Chris laughs]

I don't chew. I just swallow.

Now, I noticed that in our French dip,
you're throwing in some of the chef's cut.

[Dave] 'Cause I'm trying to be generous.

If this was a closed kitchen,
it's none of that.

No way. No way in hell.

No, but I want to show that I'm generous
and I'm trying to give you all my love.

-For the viewers.
-Yeah.

But this is very, very good.

I've been saving this piece...
I've been saving this piece for me.

[Chris giggles]

-What...? Let me ask you something.
-Oh, my God.

-Ken, you got to get to this.
-I'm on my way. I'm on my way.

[Chris] The soaked sandwich,
which is a small category,

does have to be eaten quickly.

It not only does,
you cannot cut it in half.

If I see a French dip cut in half,
I'm leaving.

-[Adam] Wait, why?
-[Dave] You can't dip...

You can't do a half dip.

Do you actually point at the sandwich
and say, "f*ck you"?

Yeah, I do. I do.

-It deserves it.
-Even if it's my own restaurant.

-[Adam] "f*ck you."
-So if I did this...

Don't do it!

-Watch this. I'm telling you.
-[Dave] Get the f*ck out of here.

-f*ck you.
-Now watch.

-Now I can control it a bit more.
-[Dave] Come on.

-It's not about the control. It's about...
-Will you guys please call the police?

The chaos...

-Is it really?
-Yeah! At least I'm saying that.

-Do you believe it?
-Look how cooler Adam looks.

-Look how much cooler he looks.
-Right?

Listen, he was starting down here
with the Ants on a Log.

-Right. Now he's up there.
-But the catch-up is here.

We've switched.

Adam's eating that sandwich
like he doesn't give a f*ck.

-Yeah, I don't care.
-Oh, my God.

-[Chris] Is this even a sandwich?
-Boom.

Absolutely delicious.

[Chris] We do rank our guests.

By coolness?

Sometimes I cut my burger.
You gonna yell at me for that?

We're... We might do it a more passive way
and never invite you back.

-[Ken] Oh, come on!
-[laughter]

Good move.

Sort of.

[Dave] I just dropped the doughnuts.

And all that is, is, um...
What did I put in there? Some bread flour.

I wish I could give you
an accurate recipe.

I just eyed the whole thing.

Again, we've never
measured anything out on this show.

Um...

Some milk.

But you don't need to measure anything.

-You do when you make baked goods.
-No, I mean you.

-I definitely need to.
-Really?

I need to measure.

-Baking is a science.
-[Dave] Yes.

-Cooking is an art.
-No. They're both sciences, actually.

And I'm just dumb and stupid,
and I'm stubborn.

And I just feel like, during the pandemic,

when everyone was making sourdough
and following recipes rigorously,

I refused to follow a recipe.

Because I felt that if I could continue
to make mistake after mistake,

it would become like having bread,
like the Jedi force.

I could just throw sh*t together.
And it's not working.

-[Ken] Didn't work out.
-No.

But with non-baking things,
it does work out for you.

Yes, but baking, you need to be precise.

-Pastry, you need to be precise.
-[Ken] Yes.

Which is why
my pastries are f*cking terrible.

No, I don't believe that.

But you measured everything out
for the beignets.

-[Dave] No, I did not.
-Oh, okay.

Dave literally said, when he wanted
to put beignets on the menu, he was like:

"Oh, those are
just like chewy square doughnuts,

which is how they turn out
when I try to make doughnuts,

so I might as well just make beignets."

But I think that
these are gonna come out okay.

And I need to...

Uh-oh. Might be burning.

[Adam] Mmm.

When's the last time
you were at Cafe Du Monde?

[Adam] Had to be, like, ten years ago.
I was there for a summer, working.

And we went there a couple times. So good.

So are you making the beignet
like in the...?

-I mean, I would imagine Cafe Du Monde...
-Du Monde.

...is, like, the quintessential beignet,
right?

Yeah, Cafe Du Monde is one of the very...
Like, those kinds of restaurants,

and I always put them
in the rare category,

say, like Balthazar's in New York,
where tourists and locals go.

Cafe Du Monde is more tourists
than locals, still, it's...

There's another one,
there's another beignet place

that's also in New Orleans.

I can't remember the name,
but that is sort of a famous...

If you don't want to go to Cafe Du Monde,
go to this other one.

-I forget the name of it.
-Freeborn's Beignets?

I think it's Freeborn's Beignets.
Freeborn! Freeborn!

[Chris laughs]

-[Ken] Charles, Fred, Freeborn.
-[Chris] Freeborn!

Guys, I don't know what's going on,
but this is your second course to that.

-You need to eat that and this.
-[Ken] What?

-What is that?
-[Dave] You have to eat everything.

-[Ken] It's the same thing, another half.
-I know, that's why that's your problem.

-When you cut it in half, you got this.
-Jesus Christ.

So, wait, why does that mean
I also have to?

-You're in trouble.
-This is...

I'm winking at you, Adam,
you don't have to.

This is the best French dip I've had.

What's amazing is it's so tender.

It's crazy.

-And delicious.
-Yeah.

But all I did was, you know,
we just salted it.

We salted it, like, two hours
before I cooked it, get it to room temp.

It's also important
when you have a big hunk of meat

to get it to room temperature,
'cause when you pop it in the oven,

it's gonna absorb all of that heat.

And it's much better
to take meat that is not cold.

-[Adam] Mm-hmm.
-[Dave] So...

So how long did you cook it for?

I seared it... The searing probably
took 15 minutes on all the sides.

And I did that...

Is that over medium heat or high heat?

Sometimes it was high,
sometimes it was medium.

As long as you're standing near it,
you can go high heat, right?

-[Dave] Yeah.
-[Ken] 'Cause then you can control it.

At 400 degrees in a convection oven,
this oven right here,

for about 50 to 55 minutes.

-That's it?
-Yeah, I just shut the oven off.

And, again, I let it rest
for about 30 minutes.

So it was about 85, 90 minutes, all in.

[Chris] When you pulled it out,
that was straight out of the oven.

-[Ken] You kept it in there?
-[Dave] Yeah.

-For how long?
-For, like, another ten minutes.

Let the oven and the meat cool down.

When we started, I said,
"Welcome to Dinnertime Live..."

I took it out and put it right here.

-I saw it. Ken didn't.
-I did not see it.

-You saw him not see it.
-I was...

-I saw it.
-I was lost in Adam's eyes.

[Adam] I was like, "That's so cool."

And Ken's just like...
What the f*ck is Ken doing? You know?

I was looking
at this monstrosity in front of me.

-Yeah.
-This thing.

He was just cutting sandwiches in half.

He just wouldn't stop
cutting everything in half.

-[Ken] I am...
-What's your favorite thing to cut?

Oh, my God.

-Um, I'm gonna have to say friendships.
-Yeah.

[laughter]

[Dave] That's a good answer. Great answer.

-That's a great answer.
-And we're about there.

Just gonna cut it in the middle.

-[Ken] What'd we say, 2001?
-I'm hoping these are cooked through.

2001, but then we became
good buddies when we started Party Down,

-I would say.
-Yes. Yeah.

Which was 2000...

[Ken] I don't know. Couldn't tell you.

-The fact that you really remember that...
-[Adam] 2007.

No, 2008.

-[Ken] Couldn't tell you.
-[Adam] Yeah. Fall of 2008.

You just keep saying numbers
and places and times.

[Adam] Frankie came to visit the set
and she was 1 month old.

[Ken] That's right.

[Adam] She came to "swingin' singles."

-"Senior singles."
-[Ken] That's right.

[Dave] That's crazy. I met your daughter.
That's a long time ago.

-She's a young woman.
-You guys are f*cking old.

[laughter]

-Very, very old.
-Very much so.

-How old...?
-I'm old too.

-How old are you?
-I'm 47.

-You're younger than us.
-Young man.

What's your restaurant on 2nd Avenue
or 3rd Avenue?

[Dave] We had, uh, Ssam Bar,
and we have Noodle Bar first,

-in the East Village.
-[Ken] Noodle Bar.

-I went to Noodle Bar.
-[Adam] It was delicious.

I love Noodle Bar. Oh, God. Did I f*ck up?

No. I was trying to think
of something to say, but I couldn't.

I'm trying to get
in your good graces again.

I cut the sandwich
and everything's been like... It's tense.

You could say anything positive
and just ego-boosting to me,

-but you're out of my life.
-[Ken] What do you mean?

You cut the sandwich
when I told you not to.

-You had one job.
-Wait.

When a chef says don't cut the sandwich,
I don't understand.

It doesn't compute to me.

I need to control it a little bit.
I'm controlling.

You need to understand that.

Listen. It just dawned on me
that I should have, uh...

This is what happens when it's live
and you forget things.

I should have brewed you a cup of coffee.

-Did we have any coffee?
-I had a triple espresso.

-You had some before we started.
-Yes, we did.

-We both had a triple... Oh, for this.
-[Dave] Yeah!

-[Chris] You could very easily make a cup.
-Yeah.

-How much time was that?
-You make it!

[Chris] All right. All right. All right.

-What is...?
-I don't think we'll make it.

-We're gonna run out of time.
-Oh, damn it.

I have that same, uh, kettle.

-How many shows have you done so far?
-What?

Um, we have... This is our 26th show.

Oh, wow.

And Adam,
one of the top guests you've had?

Because he started out very low.
All we do is judge our guests here.

-I started down here.
-Started very low.

And you were in the lead.

The Olympics just happened, and it was
one of those things where it would be...

-How could this guy blow the g*dd*mn lead?
-I fell off the balance beam.

-I cut the sandwich. It all went south.
-You shouldn't have cut it.

-What's the best way to eat a beignet?
-I would probably take a fork and knife.

Stick it in your pants.

I would use a fork and knife
'cause it just came out of the fryer.

It's usually not this hot, but again,
we don't have time to rest things.

-You know what I love?
-That's what I would say about me.

I love having my own silverware drawer
that I can just keep digging into.

-Yeah, that is nice, right?
-[Dave] We're not gonna make it in time.

-[Ken] For what?
-[Dave] Coffee.

You know what? Did I tell you guys
about when I worked at the boardwalk?

Oh, yes! About the taffy?
Tell them the story about the taffy.

-I used to make saltwater taffy.
-Yes, yes, yes.

Wow. Commentator to the rescue.
That was good.

But you're a coffee snob, right?

-[Adam] A bit, yeah, yeah, yeah.
-[Dave] Going down. He's going down.

You might catch up with him now.

-Are you not a coffee snob?
-I'm the worst snob.

I like the highest of the high
and the lowest of the low,

which pisses off people
at the very high level

-and everyone at the low.
-What's the shittiest coffee you like?

I love freeze-dried coffee.

-Freeze-dried coffee?
-[Adam] Instant coffee?

[Dave] Oh, instant coffee is great.

You're not telling the truth.

There is good instant coffee.

-I like it. Uh, this is...
-Really good.

-We reached the end of the show.
-[Adam] Really?

-[Ken] Already there?
-[Dave] We're already there.

[Ken] Hey, listen.
It was an absolute pleasure.

I can't believe that I got to do this.
I'm gonna speak for Adam too.

I can't believe we got to do this.
You're amazing.

You're amazing.
I grew up watching you and you.

This is amazing.

Your food is delicious. Thank you so much.

David, thank you.
And, also, an incredible crew here.

-Everybody.
-[crew cheers]

True. We have a great crew.
Thank you, guys.

Twenty-six episodes, counting.
Thank you so much.

Thank you, Netflix. Thank you, Uncle Ted.

-[Chris] Next episode is September 10th.
-September 10th!

-Really?
-Our next episode. We're taking a break.

We'll be back. Big announcement coming!

-[theme music playing]
-[inaudible dialogue]