01x02 - Yokai

[bunniefuu]

[gentle music playing]

[energy pulsing]

[music intensifies]

[crashing]

[people gasp and scream]

[yells]

[roars]

[screams]

[creature screeching]

Miyamoto Usagi! Accept your punishment!

Ikuzo!

[grunts]

[seething]

[yells] Oh, my gosh,
this is finally happening!

[grunting]

Isn't this the best?

There is something wrong with that rabbit.

[theme music playing]

-[hissing]
-[Usagi yells]

[groans]

[grunts] Ow!
Maybe file that thing down, huh?

-[growls]
-[grunts]

Okay. I'mma break something here.

[grunting and yelling]

[creature groans]

-[gasps]
-[grunts]

-[laughs]
-[creature snarls]

I can handle this thing.
I got it. You guys get out of here.

Save yourselves!

-[groans] We would love to.
-[grunts]

[gasps] What is that thing?

It must… [grunts] …be a Yokai!

[grunts]

-I don't believe in Yokai.
-[Yokai groans]

[groans]

How about now?

I'm open to the possibility.

Why… are you… so hard… to smash?!

I am Kagehito!

-[grunts]
-[Kitsune screams]

[groans]

[yells and groans]

Oh.

[dramatic music playing]

[groans and grunts]

[Kagehito grunts]

[snarling]

[growls]

[exclaims]

[grunts]

[yells]

[grunts]

-[yells]
-Thank you!

[gasps]

[groaning]

[hisses and snarls]

I got this.

[grunting]

-Okay. Maybe you got this.
-[Kagehito grunts]

-You've had a lot of training.
-What? No.

[exclaims]

It's just ordinary, uh, broom technique.

-[yells]
-[grunts]

-I've never seen this kind of Yokai.
-No one's ever seen any kind of Yokai.

I mean in books. I read about Yokai a lot.
I'm kind of an expert.

Kind of a nerd, you mean? [chuckles]

[all grunting]

[Kagehito] Okay!

[grunting]

No!

[Kitsune groans]

You!

You…

You are not Miyamoto Usagi.

I'm his descendant.

Then you are not worth my attention!

[groans]

Nothing will distract me
from my soul oath.

The way must be made clear
for the Old Ones!

[all panting]

That… was…

amazing!

Did you see me?
I always knew I'd be good at this, but…

but I am so good at this!

What the heck just happened?!

That--

You all became the first
in a thousand years to fight a Yokai.

[all exclaim]

Look at this place. It's trashed!

Sir…

And the Ki-Stone is very upset.

Look at her. She's agitated!

Sir!

Why am I the only one who cares?

The Ki-Stone is a mystical gem
of inestimable power

and everyone treats her
like she's just some kind of generator!

Sir! You're… glowing.

I am? Huh.

Maybe that explains
why the floor seems so soft.

And also why I can fly.

Have you ever seen me fly before?

This is new, right?

Is he…

[whispers] …a ghost?

No! I feel great!

[exclaims] Don't do that!

Whoa!

[laughs]

Whee!

Knock it off. That's creepy!

-Whee!
-Ugh! Ghost germs!

I am not a ghost.

I think that energy blast
from the Ki-Stone

rotated my waveform
through higher dimensions.

I have a degree in quantum field dynamics.

You think you get a job like this
without knowing science?

-[energy pulsing]
-What?

Do you guys see that too?

Yes. We see all the weird stuff you see!

Ooh!

-Since you freed all those Yokai--
-Accidentally.

The Ki-Stone has decided
to awaken the Shrine of the Kaikishi,

which is pretty neat.

It's just a rock. It can't decide things.

Just a rock?

Who's your buddy? Who's your friend?

-[chimes]
-She is not just a rock.

I've read about this.

The Ki-Stone selects a warrior.

And gives them
a mystic weapon to fight Yokai.

Obviously, it has chosen
my apprentice, Chizu.

What?

[heroic music playing]

[groans]

[scoffs] Who wants a mystic weapon anyway?

[Usagi] Is it magic?

Magic is just what we call things
we don't understand.

[Usagi] Whoa!

Whichever item you choose
will be your mystic weapon for life.

So think carefully,

and don't be impulsive.

Ha! I'm never impuls… Is that a yo-yo?

You have chosen!

What? Wait! I didn't choose.

I want the big sword! Come back!
Give me something sharp and pointy!

Sharp and pointy.

That is the worst mystic weapon ever, man.

-So glad I'm not you right now.
-I had one of those when I was nine.

A battle yo-yo.

Heh. You know what?
On me, it looks pretty cool.

[man on megaphone] Attention, Rabbit.
We know you're in there.

Oh! It's the Shogun.

[man] We have numerous reports
of a rabbit…

Huh?

[man] …agitating with intent
to cause public mayhem.

Is that… Is that how you say it?

Anyway, come out at once, or…

I'll be really mad. Seriously.

This thing is great.

It's like everyone has to listen to you.
Why don't I use this all the time?

Is that the…

[static crackles]

-Is that the rabbit?
-Yes, Lord Kogane.

Rabbit, you come here.

Tetsujin. Why do you look different?

I'm glowing and floating.

Well, stop it.

Are you harboring that criminal?

I'm not a criminal.

No? We got dozens of calls about you
causing trouble all over the city.

-The Mogura are super angry.
-And he stole my pig!

Lord Kogane, there are Yokai
attacking all over the city.

What?! There's no such thing as Yokai.
Don't be dumb.

You're dumb.

-But, sir, they're everywhere--
-Blah, blah. Boo-hoo. No such thing.

Now, if you don't mind,
I'm trying to look tough on crime.

Come here, Rabbit.

[suspenseful music playing]

Wait. Why do you look like Miyamoto Usagi?

He's my ancestor.

You freely admit that you are descended
from Miyamoto Usagi,

history's worst traitor?

[gasps] What? Miyamoto Usagi
was a great hero. He wasn't a traitor!

Yeah, no, he was really bad.

-We learned about him in history.
-They put his face on every dartboard.

[scoffs sadly]

Look at me, arresting a wanted criminal

who is also the descendant
of a famous traitor!

Who's tough on crime now, huh?

People are going to love this.
My approval ratings will be over the moon.

Ooh! Ooh, ooh.
Get a shot of me arresting him.

And one where I'm handcuffing him.
And one where…

Uh, lean back
so it looks like I just punched you.

Okay. And let's just get a crazy one.

Do whatever you want. Go nuts.

[exclaims]

Great job. Come on,
let's get this guy to jail.

I have hot yoga at six.

[sad music playing]

[whimpers]

[whines sadly]

So… that guy's
probably gonna be fine, right?

Yeah, rabbits bounce back.

I'm sure Lord Kogane won't throw him in
jail for the rest of his life or anything.

You know, I just remembered,
I got a thing.

Yeah. Uh, I should
probably just cut out and…

Yeah. Tetsujin, you mind
if I head out for a little, um, while?

Mm.

Oh, weird. I can feel my liver.

So squishy.

[somber music plays]

[Spot whimpers]

Your tokage can't stay with you.

[growls]

But sometimes we make exceptions!

-Who's a good boy?
-[yelps]

[grumbles]

So, your first day in Neo Edo

and you set a bunch of monsters loose
and wound up in jail?

Man, that is humiliating.
You must really hate yourself right now.

Yes, thank you for reminding me.

And they tell me
you're related to Miyamoto Usagi

and you don't even know how awful he was?

That's crazy.

-Yeah.
-Can I tell you about him?

I love ruining things for people.

Okay, so this was,
like, a thousand years ago.

Back then, the Palace of the Shogun was
right where the Ki-Stone Temple is now,

and the Ki-Stone was like
the Shogun's favorite reading light.

Anyway, some ninja paid Miyamoto Usagi
to sneak in in the middle of the night.

Yeah, he was working
for the Neko Ninja Crew.

What a jerk. Ninja are the worst.

And Miyamoto Usagi was like…

The Shogun was all, "No, don't do that!"

But he totally did it anyway.

[growls]

No.

Wow. Hearing all that stuff
must have been so awful for you.

You look really miserable.

But you've got a yo-yo,

so that'll be fun.

Well, I'll be over there.
If you need anything, too bad.

[snoring]

[sad music plays]

-[whimpers]
-I should've stayed home, Spot.

Now we'll never see Auntie again. I think…

I think we're going to be in here forever.

[Spot whines sadly]

Hmm?

No. I can't just give up.

Everyone here thinks
Miyamoto Usagi was a villain.

I have to prove that's not true.
I have to--

-What?
-[Spot exclaims]

[playful music playing]

[snoring]

-[exclaims happily]
-Yes!

[Keisatsu] Hi.

Um, those are my apartment keys.

There isn't even a keyhole here.

The door's operated
by that button over there.

You must hate yourself
even more now. [laughs]

Man, I bet you just feel
totally worthless, and--

Dang.

[grunts]

[suspenseful music plays]

-What are you doing here?
-[grunts]

Nobody! I… I mean, nothing.
I'm not… I'm doing nothing.

[soft thudding]

She's here to break that rabbit
out of jail, and so are you.

What? No! I hate that guy.

Look, obviously, we all kind of feel
like we owe him one.

So let's do this together.

Ugh, fine.

That's a real nice weapon for someone
who works in the Ki-Stone Temple.

If you have something to say,
maybe you should say it.

Aw, you guys are adorable.

Now can we focus
on busting that rabbit out?

Yeah. They'll have him locked up
on level ichi.

Green sector, behind the armory.

How do you guys know so much
about the layout of the Keisatsu station?

I'm a bounty hunter.
I'm here all the time dropping off skips.

-And she's a thief.
-[record scratch]

I am not! I'm a performer. [laughs]

It's just that my shows
have some hidden fees.

Anyway, he should be right about… here.

-[grunts]
-[crumbling]

-Hmm. Subtle.
-Hey, whatcha doin'?

I knock down this wall every Thursday.

-We thought we'd get some yakitori.
-We were just…

You guys all came here to break me out!
Are we gonna hug?

I think we're gonna hug.

-We might--
-We're not gonna hug!

[alarm ringing]

[dramatic music playing]

[gasps]

Hold it right there!

Greatest publicity day ever.

I caught the criminal descendant
of Miyamoto Usagi,

and then I caught his friends
who were trying to break him out of jail!

That's not true. We're not his friends.

This may come as a surprise,
but you don't have to be friends

for me to lock you all up
for the rest of your lives,

which, if it wasn't clear already,

is exactly what I'm going to do.

[Spot yelps]

This is fantastic!

"Lord Kogane, tough on crime."

After this, I'll be reelected for sure.

They'll name a street after me.
Declare a holiday in my--

What the heck is that?

[fast-paced music playing]

It's a Yokai, sir! Like I said!

There's no such thing!

It's Karasu-Tengu!

You don't exist!

Go away!

You!

Miyamoto Usagi! You trapped me
in that crystal a thousand--

Oh, wait. You are obviously
not the same rabbit.

Keisatsu warriors, destroy that thing!

[Karasu-Tengu yells]

[Keisatsu groan]

[grunts]

I have no problem with you,
unknown rabbit.

Yuichi Usagi. Hi.

But there is one here
for whose blood my sword thirsts!

That is so cool!

[grunting]

You.

Keisatsu, defend me!

If I live, you're all fired!

[yells]

I can't let you do that.

You can't let me? Do you know who I am?

You are the Yokai Karasu-Tengu.

The greatest master of all martial arts.

He really does know a lot about Yokai.

[chuckles] Total nerd.

So you know I can't be defeated.

Yes.

And I know I have to try,
because my auntie taught me

to always protect
those who need protecting.

[chuckles] This should be enjoyable.
Uh, do you have a sword?

Sword!

[bold music plays]

Sword?

[grunts]

[both grunting]

Ikuzo!

That was… good.

Am I going to have
to actually make an effort?

Oh-h*!

[both grunting]

-[grunts]
-Thank you, Gen.

I still don't like you.

[Gen groans]

[Chizu grunting]

-[yells]
-[Kitsune grunts]

[groans]

[both grunting]

[groans]

You might almost have a chance
if you weren't shackled.

Agreed. [grunts]

[exclaims]

[both yelling and grunting]

[yells]

You are good, Rabbit, but no mortal
can stop me if I want someone dead.

What did I do to you?

You rule this city, and it offends me.

We're working on the smell.
There was a garbage strike and--

Do you know how many trees were cut down
to build this monstrosity?

You will pay!

[grunts]

[gasps]

Cuffs!

I bet we look so cool right now.
Oh, man, someone get a picture. Come on.

[exclaims] Hot, hot, hot!

[blows]

I tire of this.

Usagi, we will meet again.

[gasps]

You did pretty good for a guy whose
ancestor was the worst villain in history.

Miyamoto Usagi was a great hero.

Okay, man. Sorry.

I don't know where these lies came from,
but I'm going to prove they're not true.

I swear I'm going to prove it!

-Fine.
-You're the only one who cares.

It would seem you saved my life.
Thank you.

-You're welcome.
-Okay. Lock 'em up.

-What?
-Are you serious?

-You're still arresting us?
-Can I have nicer handcuffs?

Of course I'm still arresting you.

I appreciate your help and all,
but this is going to get me reelected.

Lord Kogane! The cultural museum's
overrun with Yokai. Dozens of them!

[gasps] My exhibit is in that museum!

The Lord Kogane Experience.

Wow. If only there were four skilled
fighters who had just saved your life

and proved their ability to defeat Yokai.

[sighs miserably]

I hate you so much right now, Rabbit.

Here's my offer. You guys get rid of Yokai
for me and I don't lock you up.

For now.

Well, maybe if you--

-Yes or no right now!
-Sounds good.

-Yes.
-All right.

-Fine.
-Go. And remember…

Fail means jail!

[cheerful music playing]

I am gonna regret this so hard.

[Spot exclaims mockingly]

I have waited a thousand years
to fulfill my soul oath.

If I cannot do it now, all is lost.

And when I find what I need,

this world will suffer.

Now I must dig.

[Yokai snarling]

[Usagi laughs] Yes!

What are you so happy about?

I've always dreamed of fighting Yokai,
like Miyamoto Usagi.

So you're glad
that there are monsters now?

[laughs] Of course.

All ears, no brains.

You guys ready to fight some Yokai?

Ikuzo!

[yells]

[yells]

[yells]

[Yokai snarling]

[theme music playing]