02x02 - Grant Me Serenity...

[bunniefuu]

I need you to triage
the rest of the unit

'cause we need the beds.

Please tell the interns to stop

putting broccoli in the fridge.

Hey.

Hey!

Hey. Yeah, these came for you.

I don't know if you know,

but you haven't updated
your shipping address yet.

As you can see, my
name is also here.

At first, I thought this was a
"make your own hard cider" kit

that I ordered, but it's
just jog bras and stuff.

You know, if it's easier
for you and more convenient,

I can always just stop by
your place and pick things up.

What would be more convenient

is if you updated
your shipping address,

'cause it's my
understanding that Amazon

will deliver your bras
anywhere you tell them to.

Or you could get your
own Prime membership.

Or you could tell your
parents that we're separated.

I-I will, I will. It's
just been a busy month.

Okay, well, then do you
mind if I text them?

'Cause they text me,
like, all the time.

- - So I
just keep liking every text

- and not giving a real response.
- Mm-hmm.

Oh, sorry.

I'm gonna have to take
this, I got to go.

But, um, we'll get
lunch tomorrow.

We'll go through everything...
Amazon, separate accounts.

It's gonna be a fun
way to figure out

how to tell my parents
our world exploded.

- Brit, this isn't funny.
- It was a joke.

Okay, seriously,
what do you think?

They're really good.

I'm telling you, these are
the best pancakes in Boston.

Yeah, it's like I'm on
a maple-flavored cloud.

Guys, if you really
like the pancakes,

you have to come back
and try the sushi.

Okay, loud is not
always better, baby.

Hey, look at your attending man.

Congrats on passing the boards.

That's what I'm
talking about! Pssh!

- Nice, congrats.
- Thank you.

- Grab a seat.
- Oh, I want to, but I can't.

I've got back-to-back
surgeries today.

- Oh.
- I just wanted to do this.

All right, go attend
your heart out.

I will. See you tonight?

- Yeah.
- Okay. One for the road.

Thank you.

Pancake day!

- Yes.

- What? He's got a cute butt.
- Mm-hmm.

You're taking him
out to celebrate?

Ooh, what are you gonna get him?

Oh, nothing, we haven't
been dating that long.

Well, Felicia, passing
your boards is a big deal.

- You got to get him something.
- Oh, okay.

Uh, boards. Bo-Board game.

Candy Land. Operation.

Do you always do that
word-associating thing

- when you get gifts?
- Yeah.

Maybe try something
different this time.

You know, I've been hitting
and quitting for so long,

I kind of forgot how
to have a boyfriend.

I got to get to the salon,

but, um, let me know who I can
Venmo for the fluffy cloud.

I should actually go, too.

- What?
- It's my new boss's first day.

Really? You can't
stay a little longer?

I can't, I'm sorry.

I want to make a good
first impression, you know.

- Why, are you okay?
- Yeah.

- Yeah, no, I'm good.
- Is there a gift shop here?

I feel like I should
get, I don't know,

a start gift for,
for the new boss.

Maybe like a nice pen
or a paperweight or...

What
about a succulent?

Hey, Mary, do you have,
like, scissors or something

- to cut this off with?
- Um...

Sam, new boss just
landed. Bullpen.

- What do we know about them?
- It's a he.

Not surprising. What else?

- White dude.
- Mary.

- I can't find the scissors.
- Anything good?

I heard he's Jon
Hamm's second cousin.

- Interesting.
- He's like '90s New York media.

- Okay.
- Great with writers.

Do we know what publication
he's coming from, or...?

Come find me,
my door's always open,

unless it's closed, okay?

Uh, Sammy Fink?

Oh, my God, do you work here?

Guys, I used to work
with Sam a while ago.

She put the "B" in Bzzzzzzzzzz!
It's the last place I worked.

But in an empowering way, right?

It's not like "b*tch."
I-I love women.

Listen, let's do a
proper catch-up, okay?

I'm, like, getting
to meet the troops,

but this is awesome to see you.

Anyway, so, yeah, I
like to do nicknames.

You're Charlie, right?

I'm gonna call you
Little Charmander.

The Pokémon, the
dragon. He's super cute.

Uh, Fruit Stripe Gum.

Remember that, with the horse?

It's like a classic
commercial, look it up.

If you don't wear stripes...

It's Olivia Elliot.
Keep it short.

- Hi, it's Sam.

I really need to talk to you.

Um, there's a bit
of a situation here.

So, if you could call me
back, that would be so great.

Um, hope you're
well, but either way,

call me back,
okay, please? Bye.

And so, that's when
Graydon Carter told me

he'd never been
to Gray's Papaya.

I'm like, how? Hey,
what's up, Sam?

Where'd you disappear to?

Hey, is that for me?
Is that for my desk?

Uh, yeah, yeah, it is.

Don't hit me with
it! Don't hurt me!

- No, I won't.
- I'm just kidding.

Right? Yeah.

She... she told you
guys that story, right?

Sam and I, we go way back.

- Please.
- We worked together,

we were a hot team, and
we had a weird thing.

Like, it's all cool now,

but she hit me in the
face with a phone.

Right, but it's water
under the bridge now, guys,

so we're all good.

But now we got this,
like, funny story.

How long ago was that?
Was that two years ago?

That feels like yesterday.

Like, even my eye
socket still hurts.

I don't know if that's
just 'cause you're here.

Sam? Where are you going?

I quit.

He looked up at me, and
it was like every horrible thing

I'd ever done while
drinking was staring at me.

I mean, that guy is a
living, walking trigger,

- let me tell you.
- Sounds awful.

It was awful.

And then you just...
You just walked out?

Yeah, I turned around
and I walked out.

Well, I'm sorry that
I missed your calls.

Um, I was just so
nauseous today.

Everything makes me nauseous

except these beautiful
little green suckers.

I feel like if we had connected,
I would have recommended

you take a little more
time with that decision.

Oh. Well, yeah, but, you know,

I did what I had to do to
protect my sobriety, so...

Your sobriety? Really?

- Yeah.
- So, if you hadn't gotten out of there,

you would have had a drink?

- Maybe.
- I'm asking.

Were you protecting
your sobriety,

or were you protecting your ego?

- You acted impulsively, Sam.

You know one of the hardest
things for an alcoholic

is to not react in the moment.

Well, you weren't there,
and I had no choice, so...

You always have a choice, you
just need to give yourself

more time to make it.

- I mean, my brain...

my brain moves pretty
fast, you know?

So I think I made
the right decision.

Okay, good. If you
think that you made

the right decision, you
made the right decision.

Bottom line, all men want the
same gift for any occasion.

I gave my new man a
little homemade coupon

for one for his birthday.
It was super cute.

A coupon? For what?

You know, for... mm-mm.

- Butt stuff?
- No, Felicia.

The other hmm-hmm.

Ah, okay. I see you, Tina.

- Girl, he's never been happier.
- I bet.

And that one worked for
all my other boyfriends.

I don't know, Pete's
different. He's, like, fancy.

Wow, okay. You're
overthinking it.

Actually, okay, wait.

What if... hear me out... I
did something artsy with this?

- Ah.
- Put it on a mug?

I think the coupon still works,

but I respect your
decision as a woman.

Thank you, Tina. I
respect your acrylics.

Oh! Thank you.
They're hobbits.

Oh! Oh, there's Bilbo.

You know, I'm so glad that
we decided to do this.

I'm totally with you
about telling our parents.

Oh, that, that's
really good to hear.

But, you know, I've
just been thinking

that we want to do
this at the right time.

And my parents
are going to Guam.

Well, I mean, Guam, that's,
that's once in a lifetime, so...

And then we run
into the holidays.

It's just a special time for us.

Right, the holidays. And Guam.

Hello, sweetheart!

Hey, guys!
Thanks for coming!

- You invited my parents.
- I did, yeah.

Why are you home?

- Um...
- What?

Okay. No, no, don't freak out.

Just remain calm.

- What?
- I quit my job.

Did someone try to Me Too you?

What? No. It's a long story.

Okay, well... good for you.

- Really?
- Yes.

Wow. Thank you, Mom.

Olivia was a bit judgy.

Well, she's wrong,

and it wouldn't
be the first time.

If you quit a job
that you liked,

something must have happened.

Exactly.

Something did happen.

You know, my employment
changed and now it's untenable.

Yes, you see?
There's a reason.

You wouldn't just
suddenly throw away

a perfectly acceptable job.

- Of course not.
- No.

It was spur of the
moment, you know?

- It-it felt right to me.
- Yeah.

You must trust your
gut instinct, Samantha.

The body always knows.

Like when I realized I
can no longer eat gluten.

Well, but you can eat gluten,
'cause we had pasta last night.

I can eat wheat in pasta form

because the Italians
grow it differently.

And, Samantha, mm, Hit Pause?

It's just Bzzzzzzzzzz
under a better name.

- I mean...

You know where I
think you belong.

Please don't say

The Boston Globe.

- Oh.

It's gonna be Bob.

When I get back, let's
brainstorm career choices.

I have so many ideas.

I'm excited for you.

You just blew your
entire future wide open.

What the hell, Joel?
You blindsided me.

Huh, yeah, you know what
was kind of a blindside

for me, Brit?

You didn't come home
on our wedding night.

And then, the next
morning, you picked me up

and we went to brunch
with all of our families

like nothing ever happened.

Look, you know my parents.
They're conservative.

They have no
context for divorce.

They're Haitian, that's not
a thing where they grew up.

I can't just drop it on them.

They-they think divorce
only happens on reality TV.

- And I really don't want to.
- That's nice.

You know what, my
life has been hell

for the last six months, okay?

I mean, what are we
doing, like, keeping up

a fake marriage
for your parents?

What is next, you
get fake pregnant,

and then we fake have the baby,

and then we send our
kid to fake college

on a fake soccer scholarship,

and do this until
your parents die?

You can't hold up
my life like this.

Okay, okay.

Hello.

Hey, what are you doing here?

Um, I was just thinking,
aren't you always complaining

about your receptionist

and how she's, like,
terrible at her job?

Marisol, you want to
take your break, hon?

Okay.

Yeah, she sucks. She's
always in the bathroom

- taking pics for FeetFinder.

Granted, the lighting
in there is...

Well, uh, I would officially
like to throw my hat

- in the ring, please.
- For what?

To be your new receptionist.

Sammy, you have a job.

No, I... I did, but I, um,

I quit this morning, actually.

Oh. Weird move.

Okay, well, I hate
to break it to you,

but you're never
gonna work here.

- Why?
- We would k*ll each other.

- Our friendship would be over.

I'm a tough boss. I'm
sorry, I can't help you.

No, that's all right. I-I
figured it was a long shot.

You know, I'm glad
you stopped in.

How would you rank
these gifts for Pete?

I-I mean, I barely know him.

Samantha, you literally
rank sh*t for a living.

I mean, you did.

It was your thing.

It is my
thing, isn't it?

sh*t.

Your father and I
were just talking.

Did we tell you we're
going on a cruise

to watch the dolphins
while we're in Guam?

Mom... Dad...

Brit?

Yeah, we should order soon,

'cause the food
here takes forever.

Okay, it's clear
you're literally

never doing this, so...

Joel and I are separated.

- We're getting divorced.
- Divorced?

But why? Are you fighting?

Ah!

Yeah, I mean, it's fine so far.

It's Boston, so whatever, but...

Hey. You have a sec?

Look, I'm-I'm sorry about
what happened earlier.

I, I'm hoping we can
put that behind us

and start fresh.

I don't know, I just... I
don't think that's possible.

- I...
- Try to see it from my side.

It's my first day, and you quit.

I'm trying to make a
good first impression.

I'm doing, like, the nicknames

and creating this fun dynamic,
and you just walk out?

Okay, can we stop
messing around?

I'm not messing around, Sam.

Like, people out there,
they're gonna think

we either slept together

or that I'm some kind
of monster, or both.

No one's gonna think
we slept together.

Look, I really hope
that you'll reconsider.

- I'm not like that anymore.
- Oh, really?

- Really.
- 'Cause all of that

felt like vintage
Sammy Fink to me.

And listen, I think it's great

that you're working
on yourself, okay?

But you can't do it here,
because you don't work here,

because you quit.

Sam, I'm kidding!

- Oh.
- Are you serious?

You bought that? Sam, it's me!

I'm not some uptight
corporate douchebag.

- Right.
- Come on, this is, like, Nathaniel.

We joke around. I thought
we were doing shtick,

and it's a funny story, and
the thing with the plant.

- Right.
- Oh, Sam, I'm so sorry.

No, it's okay, I just, um...

Like, you know that
I'm sober, but...

- Yes.
- These people don't.

And so, when you started
telling that story,

I just kind of freaked
out a little bit, and...

- Let's make this right.
- Okay.

Okay, I want this to
be your community.

I want to be your
support system.

- Oh.
- Okay, so you can come in anytime...

- That's not necessary.
- and just, I'm here for you.

- Okay.
- You know what, come with me for a second.

I actually want to do
something really quick.

Okay.
- Okay, hey, everybody?

Uh, can I get everyone's
attention real quick?

- You really don't have to do this, please.
- It's okay, no, I got it.

Just let me... I want to
make this right, it's okay.

So, we got our Sammy back.

Okay, she had a
moment, I had a moment.

It's on me. But she's back.

And we need her,
we want her here.

We're like a family.

Families fight, but, like,
it's water under the bridge,

like I said, and this
is just more water.

We're still on the bridge.

You guys all into that?
Right, Fruit Stripe?

- Mm-hmm.
- That's what I thought. Yeah, Susie Suede!

Listen, we're gonna get
the nicknames figured out.

The most important
thing right now

is that we got Sam back, and
let's give it up for her.

You don't have to...

- Yeah, Sammy.

All right, okay, Hit Pause.

Hit Pause, go back to work.

Sam, thank you, all right.
We got Sammy back, whoo!

I'll be in my office.

Thank you for lunch, Joel.

It's always nice to see you.

You, too.
- Brit.

Well, that's done.

Is that all you're gonna say?

I did what you wanted. A
"thank you" might be nice.

Okay, uh, thank you for
backing me into a corner

and forcing an awkward
moment with your family.

Okay, this isn't about you.

Did you see how upset
my parents were with me?

Look, I get it.

You don't like to
disappoint anybody,

and you did.

You just got to accept that.

- Cheers.
- Congrats.

Mm-mm.

No, please, you didn't
have to get me anything.

Of course I did.

You know, I thought about
a couple of ways to go,

but I feel like this kinda
just crystallizes how I feel.

Happy passing your boards.

Oh. Crypto.

- You bought me crypto.
- That's right.

You're in business, baby.

In two months you'll
be able to buy a BMW,

or if the market
crashes, just the "B."

"Best wishes, Felicia."

Yeah, that... That's
respectful, right?

And no one's mad at wishes.

- Okay.

Thanks.

- Oh, God, what's wrong?
- I just...

I thought we were
closer than this.

You know, "Best wishes"
is something that you get

from your great-aunt when
you've never even met her.

I mean, we've done dinner
with both our parents.

I've met Zack.

Maybe I've just been
reading it all wrong, I...

I just really like you.

I really like you, too, I...

I just, like,
didn't want to go

too intense, you know?

And we're from two
different worlds, Pete.

So?

I'm jumping into whatever
world you're offering.

- Yeah?
- Yeah.

Yeah, I'll take all of it.

Your sparkling personality,
how hot you are.

Stop.

The way you say "martini."

- Martini.
- Ooh, yeah.

: See?

You light up a room.

I'm not saying
that we have to say

- those three little words yet.
- Yeah.

But you got to know,
you have my heart.

You know what, let
me just take it back.

No, no, no, you can't do
that, that's my crypto.

No, you can keep
the crypto.

No, I just...

I owe it to you to be
as genuine as possible.

Thank you.

So, um, I actually
have a gift for you.

You ready?

You were right.

Three best words in
the English language.

- Not "I love you"?
- Ew, no.

I've heard both. "You
were right" is better.

Okay, tell me more
about how great I am.

Um, I mean, I was
protecting my ego,

and I can't control anyone,
especially Nathaniel.

I just, I love that job too
much to walk away, you know.

You figured out how to
sit in the discomfort.

- So proud of you.
- Thanks.

Proud of me, too.

I couldn't have done it
without you, per usual.

Right, about that, um...

There's been a change of plans.

I'm moving to Maine.

What? Why?

I have to go on bed rest.

Okay, well, I mean, you
have a huge, fancy house.

Can't you go on bed rest here?

Yeah, Stephanie's flying
all around right now,

helping people find
their inner girl Boston.

I'm gonna go stay
with my sister.

Look, I know this is hard.

I can't be an effective
sponsor right now.

I mean, yeah, you can.
We can FaceTime and text.

Sam, you're not a newcomer.
I want you to know,

you have the sober
foundation to get through.

Yeah, but that's
because of you. I...

Well, I don't know if I
can do this without you.

I'm sorry, I have to
prioritize my health now.

Okay.

Listen to me, you need
something for the moments

I can't be with you.

Humans are fallible.

You need a higher power.

Seriously, abandoning
me and then telling me

- to go find God?
- I never said God.

Your higher power
can be anything.

It can be the sound of
birds when the sun's rising.

- Ew.
- It can be a really good mug of tea.

My point is, you need
something to hold onto

so you can catch your breath.

Say the serenity prayer.

Mouth the lyrics
to a catchy song,

recite a poem... just something
to get you through, okay?

Okay.

Would it help if I said
it's not you, it's me?

This
isn't exactly the way

I planned it.

It helps a little.

I'm gonna miss you.

So, I don't know,
what do we do now?

How do we say goodbye?

Goodbye.