01x06 - Meatball Down

[bunniefuu]

Boat day!

It's Yacht Day. I hooked this [bleep] up.

[Vinny] I can fly, Jack.

She's the one, and I want to propose to her.

What the [bleep] are you thinking?

That girl got no clothes on.

Temptation in Miami's real.

I [bleep] up. It's something I need to tell Jen.

[automated voice] Your call has been forwarded.

There's a whole Instagram account of us in the club.

[Pauly D] She's, like, not answering her phone,

and he's wondering why. But now we know why.

There's videos of you grinding on a girl with, like...

[Pauly D] Her t*ts out. t*ts out.

♪ Here I come

[Pauly D] Yeah, buddy!

[Nicole] Party's here!

[Mike] The Situation is under construction.

[Ronnie] This might not have been the best idea.

[Jenni] We're so classy now.

[Vinny] On the seventh day, it'll be lit.

[Deena] Get the frig out of here, you crazy!

♪ Here I come ♪

♪♪

There's videos of you grinding on a girl with, like...

t*ts out and, and people are tagging each other.

And it's like a-- like a thing.

[Vinny] When Ronnie hears there are videos of him

grinding with the French girl, Ronnie's face drops.

I mean, he is trying to run away from this,

like, reality that he did last night.

But now that there's video evidence,

there's no running from it, and there's no deflecting.

It just, it is what it is.

Do you want details of exactly what happened?

Here. Take it. [Pauly D] Yeah, talk to Lauren.

Hello, Lauren? It's Ronnie.

[Lauren]Hey.

What is exactly, like, out there?

All right, the only thing I saw so far is video

of you in the club dancing with a blonde girl.

Grinding? Or just like dancing, like just--

No, you're actually, like,

twirling her dancing. Like...

I'm like, I'm, what?

You're, like, twirling her.

Like, you're holding her hand,

and then, like, you twirl her around...

Oh, twirling her. Like, yeah, salsa dancing.

There was Spanish music.

It wasn't like her grinding on my d*ck or, like,

anything like that, right?

No, it wasn't that.

But she was, like, in a see-through outfit.

Well, that's her fault.

I didn't tell her to [bleep] wear that.

No one told her to come out in Saran wrap.

We were just dancing.Yeah.

Thank you, Lauren, you're the best. Here's Mike.

You're welcome. All right, thanks.

Thank you, brother.

So it's not even that bad.

It's literally...

[Vinny] Yeah, but picture her point of view.

Bro, it's me twirling, dancing.

I know, but--

Now the Instagram police are gonna tag her

in every single [bleep] thing and be like,

"Look what he's doing!" Well, if she was a grown-up

and she'd [bleep] let me explain myself

and tell her the whole situation, the whole scenario--

[Pauly D] Right, but she's not allowing you to do that.

Exactly. So she's building it all up

in her head of me twirling a girl?

It's not like the girl was grinding on me.

You know, she was bent over, yeah. Then--

I'm not gonna lie, though, that did happen.

I don't know if you don't remember or what,

but she was grinding on you.

When? When?

In the corner, the whole time.

What're you talking about?

I was salsa dancing with her. Like, it's...

[Vinny] I don't know where you learn salsa like that.

I don't know if like, that's, like, a salsa he saw in

like a porn once or something? But, anyway...

Bro, the girl was grinding on you.

It was more than just...

I was standing on the top of the thing, bro.

Yo, it looks so bad 'cause that girl had to have no bra on.

Exactly. [Mike] That made it even worse.

But I didn't do anything. [Vinny] Yes, you did.

No, I didn't. You did something.

Shut the [bleep] up, Vin.

Dude, like, you were in the Jacuzzi too with girls.

Like, don't sit here and act like I was the only one.

Just shut your [bleep] mouth.

I'm letting you know what you did.

What did I do? 'Cause you keep s-- Bro...

you were [bleep] in the bathroom with her

and this and that.

I'm sorry. I was giving her a tour of the house.

Oh, my God...

I was being a nice, hospitable person.

[Mike] Yo, you shouldn't be going

into another room, closing the door behind you...

I did not close the door. And you know what?

I didn't know that the [bleep] door

had an "automatic closer" out of nowhere.

So the [bleep] door shut,

so it looked worse than what it really was.

I did not shut the door.

[Pauly D] Ronnie denies that it actually happened.

He's like, deny, deny, deny.

Hope this door works.

But, bro, you can't deny that [bleep].

Vin, the door closed. Like... Really?

Yes. That's weird.

Must've been a draft up in there.

I had it open, then all of a sudden

the door just went... [makes creaking sound]

and it shut. And then that's when Pauly was like...

Dude.

I can see you, brother.

Okay. Okay. Well, at le-- at least you caught it,

you know what I mean? But... Obviously.

The question is, what is the chances

of survival here?

[Pauly D] Well, here's the thing. I just think it needs

to blow over. She's not gonna pick up the phone

maybe today, maybe tomorrow, maybe the next day.

But when she does, he can explain himself.

You just gotta tell your side of the story.

[Mike] You also need to take responsibility

for your own actions and behavior, as well. I'm trying to.

She's not picking up the [bleep] phone. Okay.

The good news is, it's just a twirling thing.

She should definitely take your call for that.

But I'm letting you know, in the grand scheme of things,

you were flirting with the line a little more with that girl,

that she will eventually see.

♪♪

[Ronnie] There's so many different things going through my head

that's just like, my whole relationship

just flashed before my eyes, you know?

Like, I don't want her to think that

because of one drunken mistake, is like who I am, you know?

'Cause that's not who I am.

I have a lot of damage control to do.

[dial tone]

Uh-oh, here we go.

[dialing]

[line ringing]

[Jen]Hello? Hello?

Yeah?

Can we, can we talk, or no?

Yeah.

My motto has always been deny, deny, deny.

But that [bleep]'s not gonna work this time.

♪♪

♪♪

[line ringing]

[Jen]Hello? Hello?

Yeah? [Pauly D] Tell her to believe

none of what she's seen and half of what she heard.

This is it. Take your time, feel it out.

See what she's mad at, you know what I'm saying?

Like, you might not have to explain that much.

Can we talk about what you think you saw?

How do you know it was anything?

Or what you... how you feel?

I'm good. No, my head just hurts.

Uh, I don't think that you're good

'cause I tried to call you nine times before

and FaceTiming you,

and you didn't wanna answer, so...

Well, I was at the doctor before,

and then I was at the gym.

So like, what do you think happened?

So this way, I can tell you what really happened.

He just ratted himself out.

Why you ratting yourself out, bro?

What is happening?

What are you talking about?

[Ronnie] Like, what do you think happened?

What, what is going through your head?

Why you trying to start [bleep]?

I'm not trying to start anything,

I'm just trying to solve this problem that we have.

[Pauly D] This is actually like Ronnie

showing up to the police station with blood on his hands saying,

"Guys, I didn't do it!" Police is like, "Do what?"

He's like, "The dead body. I didn't do it. I swear."

I don't have a problem.

Oh, you don't have a problem?

Mm-mmm.

This is the way you're gonna act? Okay.

This is what you wanna do?

This is the game you wanna play?

Right now I'm watching a horror movie.

This is an absolute disaster.

Finna get my popcorn for this movie.

He's [bleep] burying himself deep as [bleep].

So you wanna act like you don't give a [bleep]?

That's the path that we wanna go down right now? It's nothing,

you're just like making a big deal out of nothing, so...

No, I'm not making a big deal out of nothing.

[sighs]

Is this what you called me for right now?

Yeah, 'cause I want to solve this.

I need to figure this out

because it's been weighing on me all night.

There's nothing to figure out.

I said I'm good. You're not good.

Listen, don't call me with an attitude right now.

I'm not. I'm calling you trying to-- Yeah, you are.

--figure out what the problem is,

and you're acting like there's no problem.

No, I'm home chilling,

you wanna call me with an attitude

and try to stir [bleep] up when I'm good.

Okay.

So we're moving past this.

Or... no.

Because I'm not gonna sit in this house...

Past what? Like, what is your deal?

You know what the [bleep] my deal is.

Like, you have an issue with what you saw on Instagram.

Like, all your [bleep] friends are sending you

[bleep] comments, sending you [bleep] videos.

Like, you have an issue.

Oh, my God. You're being annoying.

I, I'll be the girl. You be Ronnie, okay?

Okay. All right.

So, yeah, I'm, I'm sorry, babe.

It's been a long day. I just can't get to my phone.

Yeah, but you should be pissed at me

because I had a girl and, and dancing with

and all grinding up in those videos

that you're currently being tagged in.

No, that's fine. That sounds perfectly reasonable.

I was just hanging out. Like, I just...

I'm sorry I couldn't get to the phone.

It was just a really crazy day.

No, you're mad at me. You're pissed about the videos

of me grinding on a girl

that had on no bra and a sheer top

and you're being tagged in all the comments.

All right, I guess I'm gonna go check it now.

And scene. [laughing] Exactly.

You want me to let you go?

[Jen]Yep.

All right, I love you.

♪♪

[Ronnie] I know exactly where the [bleep] this is going.

I'm wasting my [bleep] time right now.

That's exactly what just happened on that phone call.

I'm baffled.

Jen was supposed to be coming to visit, and it's like,

now she might not even be coming.

I don't know how I'm gonna fix it.

It was just annoying that, like, obviously there was an issue

'cause you didn't [bleep] answer the FaceTime,

and you didn't answer the phone call.

You can't control how she's reacting to these things.

Yeah, and she has every right to be upset.

Maybe you should just give her a day to cool off.

You cool off, she cools off.

What a predicament, though, huh?

Yup, it is the predicament.

♪♪

♪ They don't wanna -- with me ♪

♪♪

♪ The haters wanna -- with me ♪

♪♪

So wait a minute, when you guys were down here,

Mike was talking to Lauren?

Oh, you weren't here?

No. [Pauly chuckling]

That's all I heard and I was like,

oh, no big deal, I'll go to bed.

A'ight, so listen.

Apparently somebody took a video of Ronnie in the club

grinding on that girl with no bra on.

And so then he's like, "[bleep], she's not answering,

she's not answering, she's not answering."

Kept calling, calling, calling.

So she finally answers, and then he like,

legit rats himself out. [Vinny] Yeah.

Kept like, "Let's talk about the thing on the Internet."

Oh, my God.

[Vinny] She's like, "I don't know, let me check."

He is the worst.

Ron's drama, I feel like, is sucking the life

out of the house at this point.

I'm over it.

Bye, Dee. Bye.

You're [bleep] crazy! Yo, he really is!

So I'm gonna go watch Vinny and Pauly get a haircut.

[Deena sighs]

♪♪

[Jenni] Here we go.

[Pauly D] Good luck in that place.

[Vinny] Oh, God.

♪♪

[Jenni] You guys nervous?

Yeah.I'm, like, freaking out.

My hair is like, [bleep] up. I need like, a fade.

He needs a full-blown haircut.

He texturizes the top.

Oh, here we go.

I'm, like, really nervous about getting a haircut in Miami.

I don't have my barber, you know?

My barber's in New York.

Also, now I need to get the beard shaved.

Okay, Mariah.

[Vinny] My haircut is everything about me.

And I am terrified of what I'm gonna get.

Hello. Hi, good morning.

Good morning.

How can I help you? Two haircuts, please.

[barber] I'll take care of them.

Cool. Nice to meet you. Likewise.

Hey, what's up, man? Vinny.

How's it going, man?

[Vinny] I'm a little scared, nervous about cutting my hair.

[Jenni] Vinny is more high maintenance

than all three chicks in the house put together.

How he dresses, how his hair has to be oh-so perfect.

Like, a low fade.Okay.

So not that high.

How his meals have to, like, keep him in a state of ketosis.

Could do a half at the bottom?

And then you can shape up the beard too, right?

Maybe if you see any, like, um, loose flyaways.

Bro, you got, like, a bald head.

You can take it right down to the skin

and the same in the back. And then no line

up in the front, that's natural.

♪♪

[Jenni] How long have you been a barber?

Nice.

One year, bro? Like, you're not even an intern.

You should be watching someone else give haircuts.

♪♪

[Jenni] This is awesome.

[razor buzzing]

Yeah, that's perfect. Very nice.

♪♪

[Jenni] It's all about the beard now.

I've never seen a man need this level of pampering.

[Jenni] You happy?

I didn't look yet.

Can I see the mirror?

Cool.

Can I see it? 'Cause I, I can't really see that well.

I don't like it.

Every ounce of happiness just falls out of my body.

I just kind of prayed to God, and it didn't work.

This guy just, like, leaves lines in the fade.

Like, who does that?

I now know there is no God. 'Cause of my haircut.

I'm wearing a hat every day for the next week.

♪♪

Good morning, brother. What's up, man?

[Ronnie] It feels like the world is crashing down.

The decision that I made last night

might have ruined my life.

I'm [bleep]. Like, I'm [bleep].

[Mike] What up?

You all right? Yeah, whatever.

Going through a lot of [bleep]?

I'm your brother, brother.

You know what I mean? I know.

[Mike] Me and Ronnie have a lot of history.

But anytime Ronnie needs the Sitch, I will be there.

Ronnie's my brother. And I love that [bleep] man.

What's going on in your head?

Just trying to recover? What's up?

No, just...

It's gonna be hard to...

fix the damage that I've caused.

I think you should just handle things one day at a time.

Don't, um, you know,

don't overwhelm yourself, you know I mean?

It just, it seems like

you got a lot going on, you know?

But you can lean on all of us to get through this.

Like, I've leaned on all you guys

to get through some of my stuff, you know?

Plus, dude, I wanna see you smile and happy, man.

The last couple, the last week I've been here

you haven't really smiled much.

You don't look happy.

That's what I'm trying to say.

I'm not happy right now.

Okay, there we go. It finally came out.

You're not happy. Okay, why are you not happy?

'Cause I gotta deal with this [bleep].

This regret, you know what I mean?

'Cause that's what it is, it's regret.

Regret. Regret, you know?

It's a...

more of a disappointment in myself.

I feel guilt. I, I disrespected Jen.

And, like, it doesn't feel good, you know?

Because I've done it before with Sam,

and I keep saying, like, "I've grown up,

I've grown up, I've grown up." But have I really?

I know you think what you're going through

is very serious, and it is. You're starting a family.

I'm very proud of you. You're gonna be a great dad.

But at the end of the day, you need to make a decision

if you wanna be in a relationship or not.

I know I want to be in a relationship with her, you know?

All right, so there you go.

What I'm saying and the way that I acted

the other night are completely two different things.

Wow. You know? So...

You're % right there.

My biggest concern is,

is dropping the ball again, you know?

'Cause I've dropped it so many times in the house,

whether it was with Sam, like, you know what I mean?

It's like, I don't know,

I just don't want to go through that again.

If you made one mistake

and you move forward, you're good, okay?

But if you make that mistake

over and over and over again,

that is now a choice.

If you learn from this, you'll be fine.

That's it. Everybody makes mistakes, we're human.

You'll get through this. You will.

We believe in you.

Whatever your choice is, we got your back.

You have those nice highlights

to fall back on, you know what I'm saying?

[laughing] You got... yo...

Come here. Come on.

♪♪

♪♪

[Nicole] What time is it?

It's like :.

We're not leaving till :.

I'd rather not... go out.

Look at that. Before and the after.

[Pauly D] I'm really excited.

Ready to go out, guys night all the way.

Oh yeah!

[Deena] Are you guys drinking?

Hell yeah. Hell yeah.

[Deena] You are drinking?

[Vinny] Hell yeah. So I might go.

Nope. Boys night. Girls not allowed.

♪ No girls allowed No girls allowed ♪

Do we bother you?

Cut to Deena crying and yelling at me, falling.

When? That o-- When have I fell here yet?

[Nicole] Get it, b*tch.

I'm gonna go. [Pauly D] You ain't going.

I'm going.

She's going to the club.

I think the guys kind of wanted to have a boys night,

but I'm like, I don't care, I'm [bleep] going out.

I'm getting ready. [all murmuring]

[Vinny] Send her out. Send her out!

[Deena] I might not even drink when I go out.

I just wanna dance. That's it.

[Mike] Let's do it.

Right now, Deena couldn't catch a hint if she fell

face first into the hint. Like, it's guys night.

Don't come with us. Stay home.

If she wants to go, she can come.

[Vinny] I don't, wouldn't recommend it though.

You gotta carry her out.

Yeah, no, I don't wa-- We're gonna carry her in.

We haven't had a guys night out since Italy,

but now boys night just turned

into "Babysitting Deena" night.

Cabs. Are. Here!

♪♪

Let's go. Let's do it.

Thank you guys for letting me come.

You're welcome.

I left my... Oh, wait.

No, yep. I left my lip gloss.

♪ Let's go, been through the fire ♪

♪ Came out unburned

♪ This is our turf and that's my word ♪

♪♪

Boy car is so much different than the girl car.

My God, none of you talk ever. This is weird.

Me and the girls talk always.

Wahh, wahh, wahh.

It's like mom just told us that little sister has to come.

This is gonna be a long night.

[Mike] This is it?

[Deena] Yes. [sighs]

I just need to get out of this car.

It's freaking me out.

♪♪

[Deena] Do I look okay? Or do I look stupid?

[Vinny] You look fine.

♪ Everything's all right

♪ Tinged from the sunlight

♪ Show 'em how it's done I'm no one that you don't want ♪

♪ Before the money came Before they knew my name ♪

♪ A lot of ambition All I had for the pain ♪

♪ We own South Beach Relax into the sea ♪

♪ Never could imagine this is where I would be ♪

[Ronnie] I'm having a great time in the club,

and it's taking my mind off, like,

everything that happened.

It was definitely making me realize, like,

I have amazing friends, and, like,

things could be a lot worse.

And I've done worse, so, like,

maybe I just need to just chill the [bleep] out

and have fun partying with my roommates.

♪♪

[Pauly D] This is actually, like, not as bad as I thought.

Everybody's having a great time, and Deena is doing great.

♪♪

You're fine?

Yo, meatball down. I have never seen anybody

go down to the ground so quickly.

♪♪

What I was worried about is literally happening.

We are going to babysit Deena all night.

[Ronnie] When it comes to Deena and drinking,

it's like looking into a crystal ball.

It's like, "And then tonight, she's gonna fall."

She's a drunk little meatball. You have to contain her,

or she's gonna roll off the plate.

♪♪

[crashing]

[Pauly D] Holy [bleep].

It's like a ton of bricks just hitting the ground.

I don't understand how Deena's not breaking limbs.

♪♪

I'm collateral damage because I'm scraping my knee,

I hurt my back, like,

just trying to break the meatball fall.

Right on cue, it's official.

Deena gets upset, now guy night is over.

[Deena] So [bleep] annoying.

I [bleep] hate all of you.

I miss you.

Figured I'd call you because I haven't spoken to you.

[Ronnie] Jen was supposed to come visit,

but now I don't know if I blew it.

Are you coming to see me or no?

[Vinny] Oh, look at the black coming off of her.

She let herself go after Ronnie.

Yeah, she really did. She let herself go.

Some girls do that after a breakup.

♪♪

Let's go.

Pile up. Yo, I swear to God

I'm never drinking ever again until tomorrow.

That's my word.

Yo, Vinny, still mad at me, bro?

Why?

'Cause I didn't spend enough time with you.

I know, it's all right.

I lent you out for the night.

♪♪

Yo, Deena. You okay?

[Deena] I fell, like, three times.

Yeah, but we picked you right back up like nothing happened.

[Deena] But it wasn't like I fell

because I was, like, [bleep] up.

Like, I fell, and I don't want Chris

to think I disrespected him by falling.

Oh, please.

You guys, you don't need to Chris right now.

I have to tell him.

No, no. Don't call him tonight, Deena.

Of course I would tell him, I tell him everything.

[Pauly D] Deena, we made a pact that

you wouldn't call him drunk. That's the only thing.

[Deena sobbing]

[Mike] Boys night is ruined,

and Deena is spiraling out of control.

Deena, girl, get ahold of yourself.

I thought I was good until the end.

You were great. You were [bleep] great.

[Pauly D] And listen, meatballs fall. That's what they do.

[Mike] Yeah.

You guys have a low center of gravity.

[Deena] Yeah, but it wasn't my fault that I fell.

[Pauly D] I know, Vinny made it rain.

He was like, "Deena, Deena!"

And then I fell because I was nervous.

It's his fault [bleep].

Deena, don't start with me.

[Ronnie] Oh! I'm not st--

Listen, I'm not starting with you, Vinny,

'cause I can't handle that right now.

Well, then don't say my name.

You're, like, the last person I [bleep] care about.

What? Oh...

[Mike] Oh... No, like, honestly.

No, he's being a [bleep] brat.

Like, [bleep] you.

I'm just trying to ignore Deena because, you know,

I know that she's drunk and obnoxious

and I don't want no part of that.

Don't even [bleep] say my name.

What are you gonna [bleep], being nasty?

[Ronnie] That was a good time.

I had a good time.

[bleep] Sammi, you never [bleep] come out with us.

You act like,

"Ah, I'm the sweetest b*tch you'll ever meet."

You're a doll. [bleep] outta here.

♪♪

I told you she shouldn't have come out tonight.

Oh... Oh, I know.

Yeah.

I knew she was gonna cry.

She always cries, bro.

♪♪

[line ringing] [Jen] Hello?

Hello. Hi.

I miss you.

Figured I'd call you 'cause I haven't spoken to you.

And I wanted to hear your voice.

My conversation with Mike helped me realize what I want,

and that is to be with Jen and to be, be a father.

Are you coming to see me or no?

Well, I want you to.

[sniffles]

Jen is gonna come visit. I'm excited.

Like, this is something that I needed,

and it brings tears to my eyes

because it makes me so happy.

How do you feel?

Well, I wish I was there.

You feel good or...?

Are you using the bed?

Are you, like, leaning up, putting your feet up and stuff?

[Ronnie] Talking to Jen right now, and, like,

just knowing that, like, I broke that wall,

I can let go of, like, the guilt.

And, like, just enjoy myself.

♪ As long as you love me

Since we're meeting Jen for the first time.

Anything off limits?

No.

It's going to be an insane next couple of days.

It's gonna be a [bleep] show.

Good luck.

♪♪

♪ Yeah

♪ What you need, Mama?

I wanna go to the gym.

Listen. First priority is,

I have to go fix this. Yeah, I'm down with that.

I already told her, Jen didn't like your haircut.

♪ What you need, Daddy?

♪ What you need, Mama? ♪ What you need, Daddy?

♪ What you need, Mama? ♪ What you need, Daddy?

♪ What you need, Mama?

[Vinny] Being a guido

is all about having a good appearance.

And right now I am so mad

that I have this jacked-up haircut.

I gotta get this thing fixed.

[Jenni] Ooh, candy.

[barber] Help who's next. What's your name, man?

Vinny. I just got a cut somewhere else,

and I got it jacked up, so...

I want all my... you know, my part--

My hair is hard to cut. Right.

So I need someone that can fix it.

Vinny... is overdramatic.

Which one?

Is he good? You sure?

All right. All right.

[Ronnie] His hair's like Brillo.

So, like, why the [bleep] do you care so much?

It's still gonna be a cleaning pad

at the end of the day.

Fix what I got, and then, like, if you need to,

go a little lower to fix it. Like, if you need

to go to like a skin or something, you can.

Usually I kinda do what you do. Like, I give texture to it.

Yeah.So, if you could just, like--

If you want to texturize it a little bit

with scissors and stuff...

I don't want to change the length that much.

And then the mustache,

I still try to keep it natural,

but because I don't really have a beard,

I have to kind of, like...

Yo, I want this guy's resume. I want a credit check.

I want to know his baby mama.

I need a lot before I get a haircut.

How long have you been cutting for?

Sh-- about ten years.

I can already tell, like, huge difference.

He's been having an aneurysm over this

for the last hours.

[Vinny] I am being a haircut diva. I don't give a [bleep].

My haircut is everything. My haircut, it's who I am.

It's the first thing people see.

[Jenni] Look at you.

What? So anxious.

[Yoel] Take a look.

Nice, bro.Yeah.

Wow, thank God.

[Vinny] This haircut was beyond my expectation.

It's not only good, it's a great haircut.

I can show myself off again. I feel like a new woman.

Like, just, "Heyyy!"

Much better than my barber at home.

Hey, I ain't gonna say nothing.

'Preciate you, man. [Jenni] Oh, I see a smile.

After this haircut, bro, I'm ready to hit the day club,

the night club, [bleep], give me a club soda.

I want every kind of club that I can get.

Now, that's a cut!

♪ Where the party at? [Party at] ♪

♪ Where the party at? [Party at] ♪

♪ Where the party at? [Party at] ♪

♪ Where the party at? [Party at] ♪

♪♪

[line ringing]

[Jen] Hello? Hello.

Hey. What are you doing?

Nothing. What time is your flight today?

Uh, we leave at :.

Jen's arriving today. And I'm excited to see her,

but I'm nervous for her to meet the roommates because

I just don't want them to be telling Jen about French Fried.

♪♪

[overlapping chatter]

Hope this door works.

I don't even like French fries.

See you soon. [Jen] Bye.

Bye.

[Jenni] Ron? Huh?

Since we're meeting Jen for the first time,

is there anything you want us

to ask her that you're too afraid of?

No, you guys ask whatever you want,

I know everything. [Jenni] That's good.

I know what I got going on in my relationship.

When's her birthday?

[sighs] [bleep].

Her birthday is...

Oh! [laughing]

[Nicole] You don't even know your baby mama's birthday?

b*tch, no.

[Jenni laughing] Give me a second.

You need to start getting to know your baby mama.

Favorite color?

Favorite number?

[Jenni] Where would she like to go on vacation

if she could, anywhere in the world?

That's a good question.

Yo!

I don't know, at this rate,

if Ron's even gonna know his kid's birthday.

Does he just not have a light bulb up there?

I'm, like, really confused.

All right, so you... Yeah, you know her.

Anything off limits?

♪♪

Nope. I mean, I'm not gonna interrogate a pregnant girl,

but I want to get to know her.

Nah, believe me, she's got tough skin, so...

I feel like it's going to be an insane next couple of days.

It's gonna be a [bleep] show.

We're just gonna be like...

Sipping the tea. Yeah.

Eating the popcorn.

We're gonna buy our popcorn.

[Jenni] Your eyes are, like, the worst.

What? Like, you're horrible at lying.

Good luck.

I'm not giving you the money.

We all know what happens when you get the money, Mike.

[all] Ohhh!

[Mike] If Ronnie continues to come for me,

I'm gonna have to check 'em.

Ooh, French fries. Who's those for?

[snickering]

♪♪

I'm starvin'. Yeah, bro, I'm so hungry.

Yeah. Sorry to bother you.

Sorry to bother you... Can you get naked, please? Thank you.

I know you're dressed, but can you get naked?

I've been wanting to have a conversation

with Ronnie since we've been here.

I'm the only father in the house,

and I've been through the good, the bad,

how it turned around, how it all came together.

So I want to have a heart to heart with him

before Jen arrives.

Yo, so since Mike is proposing to Lauren,

are you gonna propose to Jen while she's down here?

[laughing]

You got the ring?

Only rings I'll be buying is chew rings for the baby.

Teething rings. Teething rings, yeah.

Ooh, they got truffle fries. Let's enjoy ourselves.

These next couple of days should be interesting

with Ronnie's girlfriend coming.

Yeah. I'm, like, scared and nervous at the same time.

[Jenni] The real issue here is that

he cheated on her inside our house.

We didn't see it.

He could have got a blowie.

They could have kissed. He could have did a finger.

He could have honked on the tatas.

It doesn't matter if he literally said, "I did nothing."

You shut the door. You did everything.

Why every relationship that he's in, it's toxic, though?

I don't know why all of Ronnie's relationships turn toxic.

Maybe it's actually just him. When you tell a girl, hey,

I want to be in a relationship, but then you cheat and lie,

they turn toxic.

'Cause girls don't play.

He wants his cake and eat it too.

Just be single, dude. [Jenni] Just be single.

Just be single and be a great dad. That's what you do.

There's no actual way you can prepare for what's gonna happen,

but it'll change your life.

I swear, I never thought in my life I would ever

love something more than I love myself.

That's what I've been saying. Dead honest.

Like, I mean that. People say it,

but no, I mean that.Yeah.

Like, everything I do, I do it for her.Right.

[Pauly D] A baby's gonna change your life.

Ronnie needs to focus on that a bit more then focusing on Jen.

That relationship does not need to happen in order for him

to be the most amazing father in the world.

And I can teach Ronnie that.

Don't force yourself into a relationship

that you're not going to be happy in.

If you end up with your baby mama, yes, that would be ideal.

At the very least, you should have

a co-parenting relationship with this woman.

Mine was so rocky in the beginning, it was nuts.

But we got over it, and now this is

the best thing that ever happened to me.

And I think that can happen with you.

Yeah. 'Preciate it.

Yeah, no doubt. That's the word. Yeah.

Everyone else in the house has their little perfect,

you know, white picket fence, and they're married,

and they have their kids and their house

and their families, and they're happy.

And it's like I can't really relate to them.

So the only person I could really relate to is Pauly,

because he's been through it.

He's turned [bleep] situation into an amazing situation,

and, so, like, that's the person that I can relate to the most.

Listen, taking relationship advice from me sounds crazy,

but that I do know, yeah.

You're smart. You're the one that learned

about relationships by not being in them.

Yeah. You know, other people learn

about being in a bunch of bad ones.

You know what I mean? It's like-- Yeah.

I learn what I do and don't want

from other people's relationships.

So that's why I-- You're welcome.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Exactly. Thank you!

[both laughing]

After that relationship, I didn't, I didn't want one.

So Ronnie's only told Jen what happened that night,

like, leading up to the house and nothing after?

I believe he brought up about the-- him bringing

the girls to the house and getting in the hot tub.

But not the... [clicks cheek]

Right. Is he going to tell about, like,

closing the bathroom door?

Are the boys gonna-- Is Mike gonna slip up?

How is-- She's gonna find out regardless.

[Deena] He's definitely not gonna tell her. Can you?

No, why always me?

You're better at this situation.

Oh, you're good at calling people out too

'cause everyone's scared of you. Yeah, we suck at--

I am definitely not doing it. I'm the easy target for Ron.

Ron gets nasty to me a lot. I'm not doing that [bleep].

Jen has no idea what she's in for.

This visit could turn this house upside down,

and I'm pretty much scared.

Well, I have a conking headache.

Yeah, 'cause we're stressed over everything going on right now.

This girl's coming. It's, like, stressing me out.

♪♪

[Mike] Who's volunteering to cook tonight?

[Jenni] I can do chicken parm penne alle vodka.

[Vinny] Oh, oh, hell yeah. [Pauly D] Cool.

We'll k*ll the shopping. They'll do the table.

Yeah.

[Deena] Can you get gummies? Like, some type of gummies.

Yeah, I'm gonna stock up on some stuff when we go out.

Where is the monies?

In the drawer. Grab the monies.

I'm not giving you the money. I'm not giving you the money.

We all know what happens when you get the money, Mike.

[all] Ohhh!

[Pauly D] Aw, damn.

What's the deal? You know what I mean?

I was there for Ronnie. And he continues to come for me.

I don't know what to call you, "The Situation,"

"The Incarceration," "The Taxation,"

"The Probation" or... I'm really not too sure.

[Ronnie] We all know you can't be in control of the money, bro!

If Ronnie continues, I'm gonna have to check him.

Bring the fine china out. Let's be classy.

[Jenni] Goodbye, Mike.

[Pauly D] Sammi looks real rough right now. Real ratchet.

Yeah, we should, uh, fix her up.

Come on, girl, you need a shower.

[Pauly D] Yeah, I don't think Sammi's too excited

for Ronnie's baby mother coming to town.

She's, like, disheveled, she's disgusting.

And there's no way

we're gonna show Jen how Sammi looks like this.

[Vinny] Oh, look at the black coming off of her.

She let herself go after Ronnie.

Yeah, she really did. Let herself go.

Some girls do that after a breakup.

When you're meeting your ex's girl,

you gotta look better than her, you know what I'm saying?

You gotta look extra. So we're gonna make Sammi

look extra today to show out in front of Jen.

Sammi, you look great. Except for your eye.

We can't let her go out like that.

You want to pop this one on for a freshie?

Damn, bro.

Oh!

What the...

Yo, toss me one, homey. Oh!

[Deena] We got a new head? Yeah.

Who the frig travels, one, with a [bleep] doll,

two, brings two heads for a doll?

Like, what goes on in this house?

Damn, she looks different.

Well, all the other girls in the house have new faces anyway.

Facts. Facts. So she's gonna fit in. It's perfect.

Come on, Sammi. On the couch?

Yeah.

[Pauly D] Look at how pretty Sam looks.

[Deena] If I was Jen coming into this house,

I would not want to be staring at

my boyfriend's ex-girlfriend at the dinner table.

Doll or not. Like, that's so weird.

Oh, my God, that's perfect. You know what?

She looks great. She's waving hi to Jen.

[Deena] Do you want me to pour you a glass?

That would be great, thank you. Surely, girlfriend.

Oh! Okay thanks.

[laughs] I'm, like, a heavy pourer.

[Jenni] I'm so curious to see how Ron acts around Jen in front of us.

He talks a lot of [bleep] here.

And I'm like, does he talk this [bleep] in front of her?

Like, does she just take it?

What goes on in their relationship?

[Ronnie sighs]

[Vinny] Ron, why you breathing like James Gandolfini?

[Nicole laughing]

Just getting closer and closer to Jen getting here

and I'm nervous as [bleep] right now.

There's so many things that could actually go wrong.

I'm like, ah, what the [bleep] did I get myself into?

You're stressing me. [Ronnie laughs]

He's nervous, bro. His wifey's is gonna come.

[Nicole] I'm nervous. No, I'm nervous He's nervous.

[Nicole] I think we're all nervous.

Sam's not nervous, she got all dolled up.

[Mike] Oh, hell yeah. If I was in Ronnie's shoes,

I would definitely be nervous because I already [bleep] up.

Now my girl's coming.

What happens if someone says something?

Hopefully [bleep] doesn't come out inadvertently.

Ooh, French fries, who's those for?

♪♪

[snickering]

Okay, I'm gonna go sit with Sam.

I'm gonna get ready. [Mike] All right.

That's a little concerning.

[Nicole] Mike and Ron have been going at it, like, every day.

And I feel like it's not gonna stop when she's here.

So, I think Ron's just worried for the fact that,

yo, if I go at Mike, he might come back at me

talking about French fries.

[groans]

This is gonna be a disaster.

So I'm excited to meet this girl.

I wish Ron would have told her about that night.

If he was going to tell her, it was gonna be told already.

So now he's going to be telling her, um,

when he gets home from the vacation.

I think that's a terrible idea, but...

Now she's here. Mike.

Oh, Mike's gonna [bleep] do it too.

He's the worst. You think?

I don't know, to be honest with you.

I feel like it's gonna be next, like a wild next could days.

[Jenni] Yeah.

♪♪

I need a drink.

Don't be nervous, bro.

[Vinny] Ron, just sit down and relax.

[Ronnie] I'll just be relaxing. [Vinny] Yeah.

Oh, what are you guys on your first date?

I mean, why you nervous? No.

I'm nervous 'cause of you guys.

[Vinny laughs] That's why.

[Mike] When is she gonna be here? Tonight? Yeah.

What are you gonna say to her? Like, the first thing?

Like, pretend. Ready? Okay.

Hello. Hi, I'm Mike.

Do you know Ron likes French fries?

[all] Ohhh!

Bro, shut the [bleep] up.

Let me handle it when I'm gonna handle it.

I'm not doing it in the house so you can sit there

with popcorn

and enjoy my relationship go to [bleep] again.

Old Situation is out to play tonight.

[Vinny] I see a little old Situation with Mike right now.

And I'm just, like, waiting

for, like, a ticking b*mb to explode.

Something's gonna go down.

[all screaming, chattering]

Okay, okay, okay. Shh, shh, shh!

Hi, it's Mike. Ron likes French fries.

No? I won't do that.

Come on. I hate all of you.

Ron doesn't have boundaries.

So if Mike slips up in the French fry way,

Ron will just physically destroy him.

[overlapping shouts]

[all] Ohhh!

Oh, my God.

Look how nervous he is!

We're creeping. Sorry. Oh, my God. Are you kidding?

[Nicole] Hello, welcome.

♪♪

Hands in pockets at all times

at a strip club if you have a girlfriend.

Elicea gonna get pissed.

Welcome. Hi.

[Vinny] We're kinda like a pack of wolves.

You bring one of your guests over here,

you never know what's gonna happen.

Just pass the French fries.

Ohhh!

Oops.