02x18 - The United States vs. The Situation (Part 1)

[bunniefuu]

[shrieking] Oh my God!

Oh, it looks pretty! [shrieks]

[Pauly] We went from Vegas,

Atlantic City...

to Manalapan...

to Seaside...

[overlapping shouting, laughter]

I'm peeing!

So this year was perfect, lit.

Ron! [spits]

You piece of [bleep]-- Whoa, okay.

Texting me I'm a [bleep] wh*re?

I don't give a [bleep], I'll go to jail.

The man was dragged by a vehicle by his baby moms,

and now him and Jen are trying to work this out?

Whoa.

[Jenni] Everyone wants to think having kids

is rainbows and [bleep] unicorns, and it's not.

So my grandmother, the psychic one,

she's like, "I'm sensing somebody

is in talks for a divorce."

[Mike] I did plead guilty, yeah. He pleaded guilty.

It was one count of tax evasion.

Big Daddy Sitch still has some big dates ahead.

I still have my court date,

working on planning a wedding right now.

[Pauly] He's doing it. Yes!

[Mike] There is a lot at stake here,

and when that day comes, we're hoping for

a positive result.

♪ Here I come ♪

Yeah, buddy!

Party's here!

The Situation is under construction.

This might not have been the best idea.

We're so classy now.

On the seventh day, it'll be lit.

Get the frig outta here, you crazy!

Um, hello?!

♪♪

♪ Here I come ♪♪

♪♪

[reporter] Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino pleaded guilty

for filing false tax documents

from to .

[reporter ] Sorrentino is asking for probation,

but federal prosecutors are arguing...Hi.

... for a -month prison term.

[Nicole] This is chaos.

[reporter ] He knows that this stomach-turning day

is finally here in the federal courtroom.

♪♪

[Mike] My heart is racing right now. But at the end of the day,

I have to be prepared to hold my head high

and face whatever's coming.

All of the things that I've been through

the past couple years

has gotten me ready for this day.

[tape rewinding]

♪ Mmm ♪

♪ I know you have to fly... ♪

It's really a blessing, you're the future Mrs. Situation.

I am.You are.

And you look gorgeous, honey. Thank you.

[Mike] Since our last vacation in Manalapan,

life has just gotten so much better.

I'm planning a wedding.

months clean and sober.

Focused, motivated, helping others,

and I walk it like I talk it.

I'm very excited about this dinners. Me too.

It's a dinner about us.

And we're celebrating the engagement

and the wedding process right now.

[Mike] It is long overdue

that my family and Lauren's family

get together to celebrate the union of these two fine,

uh, specimens.

No mentions of, um,

any court stuff, there's no need for that.

[Lauren] But whatever happens,

it's going to affect the wedding.

So we need to think about what we wanna do

if the outcome is...

A negative outcome?

Yeah.

If there's a chance that we may not

be able to leave the country,

do you want to get married in the next couple months

and we'll do whatever we have to do?

Or-- what're you feelin'?

I just don't wanna wait anymore.

[Mike] Oh my God, you smell that, honey?

Smells good. It smells delicious.

[overlapping greetings]

[Mike] Ohh, look at what we got, honeys.

♪♪

Let me get ready here.

[man] Try this one, it's really good.

Oh!

The gnocchi sorrentina.

Gnocchi sorrentina!

That really touched my heart.

It really did,

and I'm still thinking about it right now.

[Mike] We'd like to thank every one of you guys

for coming out and celebrating

the union between these two families.

Love you guys. [all toasting]

[woman] Mazel Tov.

Are you thinking Sicily since we're-- the whole--

both families are Sicilian?

We would like to make it to the mother countries,

but that-- that may not be realistic due to some

travel restrictions, possibly.

[Lauren] But so many things have to happen before then

that I don't wanna become like--

get my heart set on Sicily--

Right. ...and then it not happen there.

You know what I mean?

[Mike] Sort of a bit of a bummer.

But at the end of the day,

things in life are gonna happen

the way that they're supposed to.

And the fact that my fiancé Laurens

understands this just reinforces the fact

that she's my soulmate.

We are very proud of what you've done

and how far you've come.

'Cause it was bad, Mike. It was.

It was very bad. It was.

And she didn't give up on you.

No, she didn't, I know.

And you know what we went through with my son.

Yes. And that was extremely difficult.

And, um, he wasn't as fortunate.

So keep up the good work.

[Mike] It has taken years to earn the love and trust

of my fiancé's parents.

They have seen me at my worst.

We wanna see the best for you.

[Mike] Thank you. Really.

I'm sure there is an elephant in the room right now

that I have an upcoming court date

that will affect, um, you know, my near future.

You know, we are praying for a positive outcome.

I'm sure both families are.

They know that I have worked so hard

to make a negative situation positive

and have the strength for that day.

We're having a wedding!

[all cheering]

It's time tomangia,guys.

♪♪

[Jenni] I can't wait to meet him. [Angelina] Hello.

Hi, baby!

I just hit weeks, so I'm seven months pregnant.

[Nicole] I miss it. [Angelina] Oh, that's his feet, I think.

Give me your vibes.

I'm super excited,

I'm finally into my third trimester.

We need to get you pregnant.

Imagine two boy baby meatballs.

Oh my God.

Messes. [laughter]

I just can't wait for the little man to be here.

Oh yeah, I'm opening my own store.

Finally! I knew you would.

When you do officially open? Probably November.

Are you gonna have like champagne for people? [Jenni] Ooh!

For the grand opening. [Jenni] Boog!

I've been so busy just getting the place ready,

basically flipping it.

[Nicole] When you walk in, these need to be pretty.

Oh, like this?

Exactly.

I've been hustlin'. So proud of you.

What about you?

Life?Yeah.

Oh God, you know.

It's fine.

♪♪

[Angelina] We have a huge elephant in the room.

Jenni's going through a divorce.

[Jenni] I don't know, it's like,

I can't figure out how to like,

express it, so I just like,

shut it out and move on. [Deena] Yeah.

Since Manalapan, you know, I'm just living the dream.

Mom [bleep].

Work [bleep].

[blows raspberry]

So... moving on.

Still getting married?

Yeah, still getting married.Good.

I think this one will be it.

Yeah, he's such a good guy. I like him.

He's actually a really good person. Don't F it up.

Oh, whatever.

[all] Hi!

How are you?

I have to give you a hug.

Good to see you. You too.

He also delivered my babies.

Oh, nice.

So you saw her vajayjay?

Yes, a few times.

Yes. [laughing]

How are you? It's good to see you. I'm good. Good to see you.

[Deena] It is so nice sharing this with my roomies.

I was there with Nicole with Lorenzo,

with all their kids.

They're like my sisters, and I'm so happy

they're here to experience this with me.

There he is. [Jenni]Aww!

He's looking right a--

This is the nose. This is the eye.

There's a hand across the face right there.

Is he sucking his thumb?

[Deena] Oh my God, look at his little nose.

He has Chris' nose.

[Deena] If you would've told me

ten years ago the same people I'm drinking with...

Cheers! Salud!

[Deena] ...blacking out with...

Deena! Ow!

[Deena] ...partying with...

[slurring words]

...would be sitting here

seeing my son on the sonogram,

I would be like, "Okay, yeah, right."

But it's amazing how life works, and I love it.

I'm happy we're all in a good place,

but we do have Mike's court coming up.

Very soon. Scary, yeah.

♪ Baby ♪

♪♪

[baby screeching]

[Ronnie baby talking]

[cooing] [Jen] What is daddy doing?

What is daddy doing? [laughing]

[Ronnie] So the last couple months,

me and Jen have turned things around.

And you know, when we were in New Jersey,

me and Jen were fighting,

somebody broke into my house.

It was just like a black cloud

just pouring just-- bad--

nothing but bad luck all over me.

And, you know, things have finally--

the storm has calmed and there's a little bit of sunshine.

Are you happy with how we've been lately?

Yeah, I'm really happy with the way we've been lately.

It's amazing, we haven't really been fighting,

we're getting along.

TMZ hasn't been on my a*s.

Yet.Yet!

[both laughing]

[Ronnie] I made the decision,

you know, to slow down and, you know,

try to get things right at home.

You know, between me and Jen and the baby.

It's been really good for us.

[Jen] She's happy.

So doesn't Mike have

a court date coming up, baby?

Uh, yeah, this is the final court date.

We're all gonna go, Pauly's gonna fly in.

We're all gonna go show support

and honestly just wish for the best.

Mike's got this big court date coming up.

And like, he's gonna, you know, possibly go to jail.

So we're all gonna go back to Jersey this week

and help him deal with what he's going through.

I hope it goes good.

[Ronnie] I mean, I'm praying that it goes well.

I mean, he's either gonna go to jail,

or he's gonna get married next month.

[laughing] No, you've been to the drunk tank.

There's a difference, okay?

[women clamoring]

How beautiful.

[Nicole] Oh, I love the sleeves.

You look gorgeous.

It's probably so crazy like, you planning a wedding

around the whole Mike thing too, right?

[Deena] We're trying on her wedding dresses,

this is not the time to be talking about court.

I can't.

You're disrespecting your fiancé.

[all gasping] Oh, damn!

He's actually dumb to stay with you.

[all exclaiming] Check, please!

♪♪

[incoming FaceTime call]

[Pauly] Yo. Where are you?

What's up, handsome? Don't you worry about me.

This guy...

[Vinny] Since I saw everybody this summer,

I've just been back on Staten Island.

Me and Pauly pretty much talk all the time.

But like, you know, we don't really see each other that much

since we became "bro-mitted".

He went right back to just like, DJing and traveling.

You heading out here or what?

Yeah, I'm here for Mike, man.

He's going through it, we gotta be there for him.

We're his brothers. Yeah, bro.

Everybody is coming together for Mike's court week, you know?

We're like the Avengers, you know?

We're just all coming from wherever to support him,

and I'm so happy that's happening

because at least, you know, that's one positive thing

that's happening out of this situation.

I can only imagine what it's like

to go through what he's going through right now.

It's a tough week, but I mean,

I give you guys credit for coming through

from all the way from Vegas, you know what I mean?

Okay, Keto guido! [laughing]

Yo, don't [bleep] yell in my neighborhood.

Don't embarrass me.

I won't, Keto guido!

Vinny doesn't live with his mother no more!

[laughing] Shut up.

Bye. All right, bye.

♪ Tell me that you love me ♪

♪ Like a waterfall ♪

♪♪

[Mike] What're you doings?

Wedding things.

What is this?

I need the full attention, so the phone has to go...

Okay, okay. All right, honeys.

...upside down. Phone is right here.

Because I have to schedule our tasting.

Well, that's something I can get behind.

[Mike] Turns out I'm not able

to travel outside the country and get married.

But guess what? I'm not gonna let that stop me.

Mr. and Mrs. Situation have found a place,

we were able to lock in a date,

and we're gonna get married.

♪♪

[Mike] Ooh, look at these gates, honey.

Ooh, we have arrived.

If you can't go to Italy,

we are going to bring Italy to us.

♪♪

Honey, this is like Tuscany off the Turnpike.

I just-- I just c-- came up with it.

Just came up with it, just came up with it. [producers laughing]

Oh my God, this is so pretty.

This is amazing.

We have a "hitch-uation".

I'm gonna have to meet with the florist again.Okay.

We have to pick our wedding songs.

Okay.You have to pick a song to dance with your mother to.

Our wedding bands.Okay.

Like, our rings. Yes.

Not like the band that plays music, like our rings.

Yes. Did you ask your groomsmen?

I did not, uh, get a chance

to ask, uh, my groomsmen.

Are you gonna have groomsmen?

I am, groomsmen is best men, right?

Babe, if you haven't asked them until now,

like, this is like really close.

I'm supposed to see them this week,

and I will ask them then. Okay.

Did you think of a wedding song yet?

I-I don't know. I-I was--

I heard one the other day

which was-- which was good.

It was the, um...

the Macarena.

Um...

We have two big events in the next days.

There's my wedding, and then there's also

my day in court this week.

You feel good? Yeah, mm-hmm.

I-I do, I feel great. Good.

Because I need you to help me reconcile the RSVPs.

What does "reconcile" mean?

Like how you reconcile a bank statement?

Not doin-- I don't even know what that means either.

And that's partly why I'm in this mess today.

♪ Let me tell you how ♪

♪ I waited all week for you ♪

♪ To take it off and lay it on me ♪

♪ I see, I see, you'll see, you'll see ♪

♪ We'll see, we'll see... ♪

Hey, boo. Hey, boo.

'Sup?

I got you guys some coffees.

[Jenni] Ohh! [Vinny] Oh, look who it is.

Mike faces sentencing in a few days,

so I think he needs us now more than ever.

Can you tell I've been growing the hair?

Dude, what is up with that?

Laurens wanted me-- It's darker.

She wanted a big boy haircut for the wedding.

[Vinny] I don't know what is up with Mike's hair.

But he looks ridiculous.

I think I look a little bit like

the, uh, guido Ken doll.

[slurping]

[Vinny] He might think him having this haircut

is gonna change everything.

Like the judge is gonna be like,

"I'm locking you up for five to te--

"damn, you got hair on the sides?

Probation."

Thank you guys for coming to our wedding shower.

You guys were there, thank you.

[clears throat] Ronnie was not there.

[laughter]

He RSVP'ed. Like, I saw his name on a thing.

[Mike] Yes, he RSVP'ed.

And then, you know, for some reason,

he pulled a no-show, he did.

Didn't even get me a shower gift, so...

Oh, really?

[Vinny] Gift-giving in Italian culture is everything.

It's like-- it's like political,

and if someone cheaps you out, you better believe

that when you're at their wedding,

you look back and you say, "That mother[bleep]

didn't give us anything" and you don't give them [bleep].

It's like "Game of Guidos".

On another note, did I tell you that

uh, Ronnie didn't get me a gift for my shower?

[laughter] No, I didn't know that.

Listen, I went above and beyond

on this man's shower day for his baby shower.

This is really bothering you.

And the man didn't even send me a card.

[Mike] Similar to Santa Claus,

us Italians, we have a list.

Every family has a little black book,

and every gift that you get-- "Uncle Johnny gave this,

Uncle Sammy gave that".

Um, and now you know what to give for their events.

Right now, Uncle Ronnie...

This guy's facing court and like, his biggest issue

right now is Ronnie didn't send him a gift.

I love Mike's reasoning.

Now that it's actually the week of...

Yeah. ...how do you feel?

I have to be ready for anything on that day.

Probation to...

maybe even a year in jail, I don't know, anything.

Oh, don't say that. That would suck.

♪♪

How's Laurens? She's good.

I'm also holding it together for her, as well,

so I don't worry her out.

Because she's also planning the wedding.

So I want that experience to be a positive one.

I don't want her to be worried.

And she understands.

[Jenni] I know Mike is trying to be super positive for Lauren

but at the end of the day,

I know that Mike is nervous as hell.

This impending sentence is like,

gonna forever change Mike's life.

Thank you for coming to see me.

Love you, bro. Bye, guys. Love you guys.

Tell her I said hi. I will.

[Vinny] I am scared of what could happen to Mike.

We wanna do as much as we can to keep him in good spirits

because this is gonna be the hardest week of his life.

I'd like to thank Vinny and Pauly, uh,

for the gifts that you guys sent for the shower.

[laughter] Oh my God!

In other news, Ronnie sent me no gift at all.

[Pauly] Ooh, damn!

♪ I see you on my radar ♪

♪ And now you on my radar ♪

[Pauly] Now I'm off to go see my "Jersey Shore" family.

Yeah, buddy! Guys, I'm coming for you.

Yo, Vin. Yeah, I'm driving to the airport right now.

Let me pull over, I'm gonna FaceTime you.

[Ronnie] I'm going to go support Mike.

You know, he's got this big court date coming up.

So listen, I'm gonna miss my flight.

Do you know what we're doing?

Are we taking him to a buffet?

Pick me up from the airport, I don't feel like Ubering it.

Bro...Bro, I'm gonna send

an Uber for you like I do all the girls I fly in.

All right, just don't send UberPool.

I'm just an UberSelect kind of girl.

[both laughing]

All right, peace.

♪♪

♪ Yeah, I'm reppin' Europe and the UK ♪

♪ When I'm overseas I flow with... ♪

Honey, I'm home!

[laughter] Oh my God!

Where's my wife?

Yo, you need to stop.

He don't live with his mother no more!

God, I missed you!

[Vinny] Ronnie and Pauly are coming to the East Coast

because it's Mike's court week.

Flowers? For you, buddy.

Oh, babe. [smooching]

[Vinny] All the guys are meeting at my house.

You're waking up my whole neighborhood right now, bro.

You don't live with your mother no more!

[Vinny] And then we're all going to go to my barbershop.

We want Mike to just have the guido therapy of GTL,

but also we want Mike to get his mind off of things.

I sprang . for those.

Damn, bro.

I'll set the table. Yeah.

[paper plates peeling]

Set.

[laughter]

Oh, what a wife I have.

♪ Flex, I'm flexin', Flex, I'm flexin'... ♪

Thank you, man. Make sure you get five stars.

Hey!

Hey, what's up, Ronnie? Did you miss me?

You look handsome! I missed you.

Yo, you know he doesn't live with his mother no more, right?

No, I know. She lives next door.

[laughter]

No more guylights. No more guylights.

Say bye to the guylights. This guy looks good.

I just needed a break from life for a little bit.

What's your status? [laughter]

'Cause I ain't seen [bleep] on TMZ.

So I don't know what's going on.

"So I don't know what's going on".

[laughter] That's how you know it's good.

Yeah. No, everything's good, bro.

Baby's getting [bleep] so big.

Right now I'm like the Predator.

Like, giving him like, a full Ronnie scan.

Like, how does his hair look?

Like, is he sweating?

Is there like an odor coming from his body?

And, uh, no. Like, pleasantly surprised.

He has it together right now.

Saw Mike the other day.

And... he looks okay.

I mean, you know-- you know him like,

how he's all positive and [bleep].

Bro, I don't know what I would do

if I was in his shoes.

Like, what my mindset would be like.

I wouldn't be able to sleep at night.

He actually said the words. He's like, you know,

"I could get probation or I could get a year in jail".

♪♪

He has to prepare himself...

Yeah....for anything.

And you're planning a wedding.

Like, how do you do two things?

Like, that's such an extreme.

But even for Lauren. She's gotta walk

into that courtroom knowing

they might not make it to the wedding.

♪♪

Wedding dress shopping!

♪ I've waited all my life ♪

♪ Gave up all my rights ♪

♪ For you ♪

[Nicole] Laurens? Hi!

Are you so excited? I am.

Are we talking dresses?Deener!

Thanks for inviting us. Yeah, of course.

I want you guys to see everything.

[Jenni] Getting to know Lauren since Miami,

I've realized she's such a wonderful person.

He got sober a couple times since we got back together.

And I helped him through it all,

but then the court case started.

I know she's going through a lot.

I know this court date's approaching.

But today, it is all about positive vibes,

undying like, bridal love.

It's her day, so I'm excited that she wants us part of it.

Let's go, ladies, you can follow me.

♪♪

[Deena] Wow.

It's like legit castle.

There's beautiful staircases, beautiful chandeliers,

and all the dresses are like, crystal,

rhinestones, they're glittery.

It's bridal heaven.

This place makes me wanna get married again.

Take a seat over here.

♪♪

[laughter] [Deena] Ooh, I'm so excited.

The first time me and Jenni came here

to like, actually look at wedding dresses.

You didn't get your dress here, though, but we were here--

[Deena] Did you get your dress here? I did.

What the...

It's probably like, weird being here.No.

[Angelina] I guess Jenni doesn't wanna talk about her divorce.

Oh, okay, sorry for asking.

Do you have a mute button? No.

[Lauren] All right, I'm gonna try on.

[Angelina] What're you guys gonna wear?

[Nicole] Yeah, what're you guys wearing?

I was trying to order my dress

and my court outfit yesterday.

Your what? [Deena] You're ordering a court outfit?

Shh.

You're wearing a gown? This is terrible.

No, like a-- like a business black suit.

So I need to get a pantsuit?

I'm not wearing a pantsuit.

Should I get a blazer?

I'm wearing normal clothes.

[overlapping whispering]

This is what we're talking about?

Oh my God, he might go to jail,

she's trying on dresses,

and she's ordering a court outfit.

As soon as she comes out, though,

we shouldn't even talk about the whole--

Court outfits. [Jenni] God forbid I plan ahead.

Lauren's trying on her wedding dresses.

This is not the time to be talking about court outfits.

I can't.

[Lauren] I'm coming out. Yay!

Are you gonna wear the pencil skirt

or the-- or the pants?

[Nicole] Oh, [bleep]!

Are you ready? What's happening?

♪♪

[gasps] [Deena] I love--

[Nicole] Stunning, oh my God.

You look gorgeous.

Look at the back of it. [Nicole] No, it's gorgeous.

Mike's totally gonna cry.

[Nicole] Oh, for sure.

I love the shoes.

They're ivory satin.

And the brooch, that's my something blue.

And then I'm borrowing jewelry.

I've been planning the wedding

for every minute of every day for the past like three weeks

'cause that's when we started planning it.

And it's probably so crazy like,

you planning a wedding around the whole Mike thing too, right?

♪♪

Oh my God! k*ll me.

That's just sad to make her talk about it

in her wedding dress. In her wedding dress, dude?

Seriously.

♪♪

[Angelina] And it's probably so crazy like,

you planning a wedding around the whole Mike thing too, right?

♪♪

"So how do you feel about court tomorrow?"

b*tch, really?

Right now?

[Deena] That's just sad to make her talk about it

in her wedding dress. In her wedding dress, dude?

Can't she get unchanged?

Seriously.

It's not-- [Angelina] How do you feel like all in all?

Like, going into this like now?

It's not a thought in my brain. [Deena] Yeah.

We shouldn't even think about that today.

No, I'm just saying. I just-- Yeah.

'Cause it's-- it's a great moment

for you right now. Yeah.

[Angelina] I'm not trying to be nosy.

I'm just like, you know, I'm trying to be

like a genuine person, like a genuine friend.

I would do this to any one of my friends.

I would want somebody to ask me how I'm feeling.

All right, I'm gonna get in my next dress.

Yeah, the party dress! [Lauren] Yes, exciting.

[bleep]ing Angelina for the win.

I'm sorry, Lauren.

I didn't bring her. This ain't on me.

God, what did I say?

♪♪

[all exclaiming]

[Pauly] Look at this situation.

Let's all take a minute to acknowledge Mike's hair.

The John Gotti. [laughter]

I was gonna say, you shouldn't go

into court looking like a mobster.

Today's gotta be the most guidoest thing we've ever done,

getting our boy ready for court.

[laughter]

All right, you guys ready to roll?

Yeah, let's do it. All right, let's go get a cut.

Oh yeah!

Nothing makes you feel better as a guido

than getting a fresh haircut.

Vinny don't live with his mother no more!

[overlapping chatter, bleeps]

[bleep] yo neighborhood.

[laughter]

[Pauly] We're getting back to the basics here

with an old school GTL session.

It's been a minute since we were all together

to do some nice, fancy, classy GTL.

We've never had to get court cuts before.

Usually we would get haircuts for Karma,

now we're getting haircuts for court.

I mean, I'm ready. I'm ready to put it behind me.

It's been years now, you know?

I mean, you seem to be in good spirits about it.

Yo, is the judge a female?

She is? Maybe she'll be DTF.

Down to forgive.

[laughter]

[Mike] I don't tell the others this,

but, yeah, the last couple days,

things have really started to get real for me.

F-- for instance, the ego is telling me,

"You got court in two days. Tell 'em to leave you alone."

Right? I'm human, you know?

But then again, these guys right here are my best friends

'cause they take my mind off of the subject

that is so serious and bring me back

to family, love, and laughter.

I am a changed man. [Vinny] Yeah, this guy

literally could not have turned

his life around any more. [Mike] My main thing is

I just wanna be there for Lauren right now.

You know what I mean? I don't want her to be upset.

She's-- she's been my rock.

And, um, I'm holding a strong front for our family.

But I mean, that's why you have us, you can--

[Mike] Yeah. Open up.

Like, you know what I mean? You don't...

you gotta be human too, you know what I'm saying?

So that's why we're here for you.

♪♪

♪♪

[Deena] Yay, party dress!

[all exclaiming]

Fun! Yaas, queen!

[Deena] Love this. [Nicole] I want this.

Amazing. Oh God, yes.

You look stunning.

[Deena] You're like a chandelier.

He's gonna [bleep] in his pants when he sees you like this.

This b*tch is so Staten Island, I can't.

The worst.

[Jenni] Calm down, Angelina.

No...

She does not talk like us. [Nicole] Yeah.

No, I do. But not like, at that level.

That's a little extra raunch.

My mouth.

We got a fantastic wedding to look forward to

on November first. So excited.

You must be dying.

People may think it's weird

that Mike and I are getting married now,

but [bleep] in life is gonna come and go.

And like, when this leaves, there'll be other little [bleep]

that isn't ideal to deal with either.

You know what I mean? It's never gonna be perfect.

Like, he's healthy, he's sober,

we're getting married.

Like, nothing can take away that--

that happiness, you know what I mean?

Whatever comes Lauren's way, she's prepared for it.

She's a strong-a*s b*tch.

She has been through a lot,

and this is just another bump in the road for her.

You know, whatever happens on Friday,

we are always going to be here for you.

[Nicole] Yeah, we love you. We love you for Mike.

Feel like you're part of our family now.

You know, so you can always come to us.

We're there for you.

I appreciate all of that, and each of you.

And I know how important you are to Mike.

It's really special that he had mended

those fences with you guys

and got those strong relationships back

so that he could go through something like this

and have the positive outlook

to know he has like, so much love around him.

So like, I appreciate you guys so much

for being those people for him.

And for me in the future.

[overlapping chatter]

I have pins.

Lauren needs as much support as she can get.

But I feel like she never really has heard it from us.

So I think it was appropriate just to let Lauren know like,

girl, we got your back, you look gorgeous,

we're here for you, and we love you both.

All right, I'm sweating, I need to get out of this.

[overlapping chatter]

♪♪

[Mike sighs]

Well, I'd like to thank Vinny and Pauly

uh, for the gifts that you guys sent for the shower.

[laughter] Oh my God.

In other news... [Pauly] You're welcome.

...uh, Ronnie sent me no gift at all.

[all groaning]

But I just sent him like, a boatload for his shower

a couple months prior.

Yo, he feels a type of way about that.

What exactly is a wedding shower?

They hate each other, bro.

It's called a bridal shower. ...on the registry.

Not a wedding shower.

[Ronnie] How am I getting yelled at

for not bringing a gift

to a party that's not even supposed to exist?

I've heard of bridal showers,

baby showers, rehearsal dinner,

I've heard of the wedding.

Never heard of a wedding shower.

I wouldn't not send you a gift. I looked forward to it.

It was exciting for me, I went on the registry,

got you a spiralizer for your zucchini pasta.

You did, you did. I got you that steamer

keeping [bleep] on fresh, bro. He did, he did.

What do you get for a wedding shower?

If you would've looked on the registry,

you would've known. Ooh, damn!

I guess he really hates you.

I thought that it was over for Ronnie.

I thought that after you miss the shower...

No coming back. ... it ain't-- there ain't no coming back for that.

But I looked into it, and it's actually

he has up until the wedding day

to send a gift for the wedding shower. [laughter]

The judge is gonna be like,

"Mike, do you have any final words for the court?"

"Ronnie never sent me a gift".

[laughter]

Let me see this grown man cut over here.

You look like you're ready.

[Pauly] I'm confused, I don't know how to feel.

Because I feel bad for Mike, he's going to court.

I feel happy he's getting married,

I feel happy we're getting ready for this wedding,

but yet he's pending this court trial.

It's just a lot, I'm confused.

I can imagine how Mike feels.

I couldn't be more grateful

to have you guys in my life.

We've been boys for almost ten years.

You know what I mean? And, um,

all this grooming right now...

it's got me thinking about some groomsmen.

[all gasping] Okay?

Although you've always been my boys,

I need you to be men.

My best men.

[all exclaiming]

[overlapping chatter]

Can you have multiple best men?

Yes. Yeah, of course.

Never been a best man before.

That actually means a lot to me.

Sure you want me?

[laughter] Come on, come here.

Must I remind you-- must I remind you--

[overlapping chatter]

RSVP. R...

Wait, I'm not R. You're R.

[laughter]

[Mike] Myself and the boys,

we've been together for ten years.

And I am so proud that these boys are now men.

My best men.

'Sup, man? Pauly.

What's up? Mike.

Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you.

[Ronnie] Honestly, bro, like,

it doesn't get any better than this.

♪♪

[all cheering]

[Mike] We're going to Italia! [Pauly] Yeah, buddy!

We're gonna remember this forever, you know what I mean?

♪♪

[Pauly] The crazy memories that we have,

we'll never forget.

MVP! Guys weekend.

[laughter]

[Mike] This is the best day of my life.

[all cheering]

So, um, although there's a lot of things

going on in my life right now,

I don't know if I would change anything.

R... S...

V... P...

[all] Wedding squad! Yeah, buddy!

[laughter]

♪ Give me something to let go ♪

♪♪

♪ Give me something to let go... ♪

[Angelina] So this is gonna be fun.

Do a nice little dinner. Yes.

Catch up. Rally for Mike.

Rally for Mike, tell him

he's gonna be okay and we're there for him.

I think he needs us.

He's got a lot coming up right now, so...

I'm terrified for him. I'm like...

Tomorrow is Mike's court date.

So we're going to dinner with the roomies

just to let him know we love you,

we're here for you.

Dude, we got your back.

[car shakes] Oh my God, Nicole!

[horn blaring] Sorry.

He knows we're close. [laughter]

[Angelina] God, you're gonna k*ll me.

I c-- I'm gonna hit , and I will never see my wedding.

[Jenni] I have the worst migraine right now.

[Deena] I have Tylenol.

I got three hours of sleep last night.

One kid would cough, whatever the [bleep] it is.

Thank you. And Greyson's bloodwork

got returned to [bleep] this morning.

Poor thing.

So Greyson has really bad OCD.

And he's hyper sensitive.

He's always in fight or flight mode.

And he's like, never able to like express himself.

He's always tense. Like, his pediatrician--

his pediatrician now in Orlando is a specialist.

He was diagnosed by both of them as autistic.

I took him to Orlando last week to see a specialist

for, um, autism.

And Greyson threw the biggest fit

he's ever had in his life at the airport.

That post you put up in the airport got me so upset.

Oh God, that like, k*lled me, dude.

I've never... I've never experienced

anything like that in my life.

Greyson scratched his face,

snapped my glasses,

was headbutting me in front of everybody.

Like, hitting me, slapping me, biting.

And I see people recording and I'm like, oh my God,

like, [bleep] help me.

I literally looked at th-- the agent,

I was like, "Can you help me?"

My son is like, he has no idea

what he's doing right now.

He's completely like, manic, like freaking.

And like, I was just--

I started crying right there on line.

I was like, I'm defeated.

Done. Like, just started bawling.

And I walked on the plane like, crying the whole time.

[Deena] Jenni had a rough going.

It really breaks my heart.

We're all trying to be there for Mike

and get Mike through all of his hardships.

At the same time, Jenni needs support as well.

I'm sorry.

I took the initiative...

for getting him help.

You know, that was a huge argument

between Roger and I. I remember.

Like, "He's fine, he's fine, he's fine".

I think with Roger, he just didn't want

to accept tha-- like, you know?

He had a nervous breakdown in the pediatrician's.

Like, my heart broke for him 'cause he was like,

"I just want my son--" I mean, it has to be hard for everyone.

He's like, "I just want my son to walk down an aisle

and have a family of his own."

I know, I just feel so bad for him.

Roger believed that Greyson was just a slow learner

and he was gonna learn on his own.

And that caused a lot of tension in our household

because, um, you have one parent that's like,

I need to get ahead of this, which is me, and fix it.

And you got another parent that's like, "What're you doing?

It's not a big deal," you know?

"There's nothing wrong with Greyson, bah-bah-bah."

So it is such a [bleep] situation to be in.

You as parents can only do so much, you know?

♪♪

♪ Nothing but a vessel ♪

♪ Tossed so callously at sea ♪

[Deena] I can't imagine what this girl is going through.

I don't know how she's doing this.

I give her so much credit.

I say it's [bleep]ed up, but I always say like,

I'm gonna hold his hand until I can't.

And when I can't hold his hand anymore,

my money's gonna hold his hand. Mm-hmm.

So it's like, I'm preparing

not for my retirement, but like my kids' retirement.

♪♪

[Jenni] It's really hard to explain it

to people that don't have kids

the level of sacrifice we make for them.

It's like... [grunts]

b*tch is tired.

♪♪

♪ Even if I weren't famous ♪

Hi, there's eight of us.

Vinny don't drive a yellow Cobalt no more!

Hi!

What's up? Wow, look at you.

[Deena] Tonight we're gonna have a dinner for Mike.

It's the night before he has to go to court.

We don't know what's gonna happen.

And we just wanna get Mike's mind off of things

and just to have a good time.

Ohh!

[all exclaiming]

[Pauly] There's Mike "The Gotti" Situation.

[Vinny] John Gotti.

Listen, we are coming down to the wire with my court date.

It means the world to me that my Shore family

has come together to support me.

It's pretty special.

Special occasion today?

[laughter]

We haven't all been together...

[Ronnie laughing] ...in a little bit of time.

It's been a couple months, right?

Since Manalapan. How's everybody doing?

Kids are great, Lorenzo's in kindergarten.

Aww. Jenni?

[Jenni] Ugh, the last thing I wanna do

is talk about my life.

Nothing's really changed. [chuckles]

[Mike] Yeah?Yeah.

Ron, what's your update like?

I'm good... [all clamoring]

[Pauly] She came in hard.

[Ronnie] It's [bleep] real annoying

that Jenni don't talk about her divorce,

but she loves to be involved in other people's business.

You will not want what you are

when your [bleep] daughter is here.

You [bleep] a crazy b*tch.

You got a crazy b*tch pregnant!

[Ronnie] Like, I don't get it. I guess I'm that interesting.

[bleep] Most Interesting Man, I guess.

Everything's good.

The baby's getting big, she's crawling already.

Everything's good with Jen...

Really? How was your flight?

Are we gonna see her? Yeah, if you want.

[Deena chuckles]

[Angelina] Oh God, Ron's baby mama Jen is gonna be here.

But hey, it feels like they're in a good place right now.

I mean, there's no cuts on Ron.

There's no like, black and blues on him.

He doesn't have like, a bulging eye.

You know what? And I don't think

Ron's been dragged by a car for a while,

so that's a plus.

Mike, if you had hours...

before prison, what would you do?

Um, I would do exactly what I'm doing right now.

I'm out to dinner with my best friends.

My A-'s from day ones.

And then go home to my beautiful fiancé

who I'm getting married to in the next month.

And, um, make sweet passionate love.

[all] Aww. And then afterwards,

maybe some burgers and fries.

[laughter]

I'd be in a corner, in a hole going like this.

[laughter]

He'd be in the fetal position.

[Nicole] Facts, same. Facts.

Waiting impending doom. Sucking his thumb.

Taking all my Xanax. [Pauly] Angeliner?

[laughter] I would finally get pounded out.

[Mike] Oh my God.

[Pauly] By who, though?

Last hours, you have nothing to lose.

Yeah, who would it be? Vinny?

Um, Ronnie.

Ooh! What?!

No thank you!

[Deena] What in the frickin' world?

[Pauly] ♪ Awk-ward ♪ [Nicole] Why would you say that?

Hey, why not? [Pauly] Wow.

Single Angeliner.

Angelina, what ar-- what're we doing?

Dude, remember that whole time in Manalapan,

I was like, you really need to like,

put Chris on a pedestal.

But I do, I love him. He's a great guy.

And you know what? We have a very good relationship

and least he could deal with...

You're disrespecting your fiancé.

[all gasping] Oh, damn!

My relationship is great.

[all exclaiming]

[Angelina] Jenni is starting to get on my damn last nerve.

My relationship is so bad.

Yeah, I'm gonna run and listen to you.

Like, get the [bleep] out of here.

Like, no [bleep] way.

Stop talking about my relationship, thanks.

Yeah, but you're disrespecting

your fi-an-cé.

She's like, "You have to respect your man."

But you're getting divorced.

You know, don't throw stones at glass houses,

because that [bleep] house will fall very quick.

I can go in right now.

Oh my God. I'm shutting my mouth.

I'm shutting my mouth, Vinny. I'm shutting my [bleep] mouth.

Chew toy. [Pauly] Ooh!

[Vinny] Angelina's brewin'. Listen, if you got

something to say, say it. Ooh!

Like, he's actually dumb to stay with you.

[all exclaiming]

Check, please!

♪♪