02x14 - Home Alone

[bunniefuu]

♪ Something tells me I've been dreaming ♪

♪ Of someone who was never real. ♪

♪ It seems I've changed a thousand ways, ♪

♪ I wish I looked the way I feel! ♪

♪ Braceface! ♪

♪ My life is complicated! ♪

♪ Boyfriend! ♪

♪ Don't want to talk about it! ♪

♪ Teenage! ♪

♪ I'll work it out in the end! ♪

♪ Braceface! ♪

Too much popcorn.

I told you we should have shared.

Maria, everyone knows the only thing in the world

Sharon refuses to share is popcorn.

Hey, sharon.

Oh, hey you guys!

Did you just see that movie, too?

Yeah, wasn't it lame-o?

I liked it.

Me too.

(Laughs) so what are you guys up to now?

I don't know. How about you?

Anyone wanna head over to life cycles?

Umm, guys?

We always go there. How about we go bowling?

Yeah!

Cool.

That sounds fun.

Glow-in-the-dark bowling starts at 9.

Right on.

I hate to be the wet blanket, but it's already 9:30

And I have to be home by 10:00. Doesn't anyone else?

No.

Too bad.

Oh, that's okay.

C'mon, we'll walk you home.

We'll meet you at the bowling alley in 20 minutes.

I'm sorry, you guys.

No problem.

But it's embarrassing!

I'm the only one who has to be home this early.

It makes me feel like a little kid.

Honey, I really can't deal with this right now, okay?

There's nothing to 'deal' with.

Just extend my curfew by an hour and I'll stop bugging you.

Let's talk about it when I get back.

But that's a whole other week!

Yes. I know. A whole week in paradise.

Don't rub it in, mom. While you're in hawaii,

I'll be in algebra.

Be nice, honey.

This is my first vacation in six years.

And my first one ever with david.

Yeah, yeah.

I've arranged for the babysitter

To come tomorrow at noon.

Did I just hear the word 'babysitter'?

That's right. Her name is mitzie

And she comes highly recommended.

I'm 17. I don't need a babysitter.

It would be irresponsible for a mother

To leave her children home alone,

Especially when the children's father is out on tour.

But a babysitter?

Call her what you want.

Mitzie will be here to cook,

Clean and be with you in case of an emergency.

(Sigh) whatever.

I'll only be able to fully relax

If I know you're in good hands.

And sharon, if you act responsibly while I'm away,

I'll be more inclined to extend your curfew.

Okay.

Oh come on, it's not so bad. Smile!

Aloha!

Do you think mom's there yet?

Yup. She's probably sipping fresh guava juice on the beach.

Guava juice? Yuk.

(Phone rings)

Spitz residence.

Sure.

Mitzie, it's for you.

Hello...

Ah! A boy!

Oy, I can't believe my ears!

I'm catching the next plane out!

I'm a grandma - three weeks early!

I'm so sorry, kids, but my daughter needs my help

I really have to go.

You're a big strapping man

You can hold down the fort while your mom's away.

And when you call her, please explain.

I'm a grandma!

Okay.

I'm calling mom.

We can't do that.

It's her first vacation in a million years.

But who's gonna look after us?

We'll look after ourselves.

Show mom that we can be responsible.

But we can't.

Yes, we can...

I can drive you anywhere you need to go.

What more do we need?

Oh, I don't know...

Food, money, help with homework?

Listen josh, it'd really prove something to mom

If we could deal with this situation

Without bothering her. Okay?

Deal.

Hey, where're you going?

Video games!

Oh, no you don't.

Not 'til you finish your dinner and help with the dishes.

I'll bet mitzie wouldn't make me do dishes.

You'll never know now, will you?

Wow! So the three of you have the house to yourselves

For the week - and your mom doesn't even know?

It was the only responsible thing to do.

I didn't want to ruin her vacation.

Very mature.

Did I just hear you say that the spitz abode

Is parent-less?

Par-tay!

No way, brock.

You sure? We could have tons-o-fun.

Forget it! I'd be grounded for life

And never get my curfew extended.

Tch. Too bad.

Oh, well. Bye.

He is so annoying.

The other night he threw bowling ba*ls

Down other people's lanes.

You think that's funny?

Kind of.

It's just so brock!

You wouldn't have found it quite so amusing

If you'd been there.

Well, if things work out like I plan, next time I will be!

What's that?

My to-do list.

If I hurry, I can pick up mom's dry cleaning

Before school starts.

Okay, see ya in class.

Actually, could you come with me?

Why?

The cleaner's right next door to the pet store,

And I need to get dog food -

But I can't carry it all by myself.

Okay, spitz, if this'll help you extend your curfew,

Let's go!

Pss! Connor!

Connor.

Pass it.

(Laughing)

Shhhh! I'm trying to balance the household expenses.

Wait up you guys!

Hey, it's 'the shusher'!

I'm really sorry about that,

But I was having a hard time concentrating

With you laughing and crinkling notes and stuff.

We weren't that loud, sharon.

I know, but I'm kinda stressed.

I have to go to the market at lunch

'Cause there's not enough food in the house...

And after that I have to supervise josh's chores

And walk the dogs and clean the house,

And pick up the dry cleaning, and clean the carpets,

And prepare the meals,

And do the laundry as well as my homework and-

'Scuse me sharon,

But last I checked, you had two brothers.

Why's everything up to you?

You're right. I'll be back.

Uh, excuse me, adam?

Not now, sharon.

Yes, now, adam.

What is it?

The grocery list...

And be sure you don't forget the kitty litter.

Phew! This is harder then weight training.

C'mon, I just have to pick up some stuff at the pharmacy.

I thought I was done with your chores

When I helped you get all this on the way to school.

Just two more stops.

Four at the most.

Then you can relax at home while I go make dinner.

Wait a minute!

Last week you said we were gonna go check out in-line skates.

Oh, I totally forgot. I'm sorry.

I guess we'll just have to do it some other time.

Remember the big picture, here.

Shoes off, please. Thanks.

Can't track dirt into the house. Hope you don't mind.

(Joking) I didn't know you made the team.

Ha ha. Very funny.

C'mon, shoes off, con.

I heard.

I have to ask you something.

Mmm hmmm.

It's about alyson.

You mean your girlfriend?

But that's just it.

We've been spending all this time together

And I'm pretty sure I like her...

Yeah...

But how can I tell if she likes me?

(Sneeze)

Connor, you've been through this before.

Do you have fun together?

Always.

Unless, of course, you're shushing us.

Ha ha.

But what if she's the kind of girl

Who just has fun with whoever she's with?

I mean, she was friends with nina for all those years.

Adam? Could you tell your friends to keep it down?

Josh's trying to practice.

Sorry.

Connor, I just polished!

Okay, sharon?

Can I tell you something else?

Of course.

Well, you're...um... Kinda driving us all nuts lately

With your new responsible attitude.

Us? Who's us?

Me, maria, alyson...

Don't you understand?

I'm acting this way to extend my curfew so I can have fun!

See? That was fun, wasn't it?

Listen up everyone...

Don't forget to come out on friday

And support our football team!

Yay, woooo!

Give me a elk

Give me a ford

Yay elkford!

(Cheering)

Hey, why don't you have the after-game party

At your parent-free house, braceface?

Oh wait, I forgot -

You're too much of a goody goody to have fun.

No I'm not.

Am i?

Well, uh...

Not usually.

Okay, if I wanted to break free

From my stick-in-the-mud reputation,

Now was probably the time.

I mean, even if I did get an extension on my curfew,

Nobody would want to hang out with me anyway!

Party at the spitz house, this saturday night!

(Cheering)

Uh oh. What had I gotten myself into?

I can't believe you agreed to this, sharon!

You and me both.

On the record, I think it's a terrible idea,

But off the record, I'm totally psyched!

Me, too.

Okay, josh, but you have to promise me

You'll be in bed by 10:00.

But-

No buts! That's even later than my curfew!

All right.

And you can't say anything to mom or dad.

I promise.

Adam, go look around for any other breakable things

I might've missed.

Sharon... You've gotta chill.

I'm trying, but-

This is gonna be a totally cool party

With a totally cool crowd.

You don't have to worry so much about things breaking.

Okay, okay, I'm doing my best.

Do your best, and then do even better.

Yoga breaths, sharon.

You're the one who taught me that.

I'm sure everything will be under control.

(Party walla)

Hey maria, where are you?!

Hi...

I can't believe you actually went through with this.

Well, I did,

And I'm just throwing caution to the wind and-

And having the time of my life!

No worries here! No way!

Hey, sharon!

Oh, hi!

Are you sure you're having fun?

Why do you say that?

Oh... Uh... This?

(Laughing) hey!

Aaaaggghh!

(Laughter)

It's already 10:15, josh.

But I was getting requests!

Who's the cutest kitty?

You are! Aren't you, little guy?

Eh hem.

Hi, maria. Meow, meow.

I didn't know you were into cats.

Are you kidding? Cats are the greatest.

Aren't you, mr. Cutie?

Meow, meow.

What'd you say, moishe?

You say that you think maria is-

I, uh... Have to go somewhere.

Something you said?

I really need to talk to you.

What broke?

Nothing.

Did you know brock is totally into cats?

No.

I just saw him...

Obnoxious, annoying brock

Acting like an actual human being. Look.

He's being totally adorable with moishe.

Awwww.

It's - amazing to see.

Maria, even though brock can be annoying,

He's still a good guy.

I've been telling you that for decades!

What're you doing?

Nothing. My elbow's itchy.

(Helen's answering machine) so please leave a message after the beep.

Oh. I'm getting the answering machine.

Hello? Is anyone there?

Pick up... It's your mother.

I guess you guys're watching tv

I told you not to have it up so loud

That you can't hear the phone.

Anyway, we had to cut the trip short

Because david thought he could surf.

Which he can't.

So we're on our way from the airport and we'll be home soon.

Can't wait to see you! Bye!

Is it weird being at the same party as nina?

Not really.

It's almost like we never knew each other.

But you were best friends.

Yeah, I guess she was good for me then.

Oh, well. C'est la vie.

Ha ha ha!

Oh, no! I'm sorry.

I'll be right back.

I just spilled my drink all over -

The couch??

Connor, you have to be more careful,

My mom'll k*ll me!

Not the couch. Alyson.

I have to vacuum. The carpets are a mess!

Hey, you guys. Please don't do that in the -

Oh, no! You broke it! How could you do that?

Calm down, sharon, it's only a lightbulb.

But we've got to replace it.

And we will.

Hey. Take it outside.

You already broke something.

You're changing a lightbulb in the middle of a party?

No! Of course not. I was just going to...um...

Propose a toast!

Yo, everyone! Shh, sharon's got something to say.

Uh... I'd like to toast my mom!

For taking off to hawaii,

So we could have the blow-out party of the year!

Wooh! To sharon's mom! Yeah!

(Cheering, laughing)

Yeah! Woo hoo!

This is me having fun.

Oh look, sharon the monkey.

Sharon ester spitz!

Bye, connor.

Sorry I wasn't more helpful about alyson before.

That's okay.

I promise we'll have a good, long yak about it tomorrow.

Okay.

If you're ever allowed to talk on the phone again.

Well, we're off, too.

I'm gonna walk sensitive brock home.

Dude! I don't need you to walk me home,

I'm walking you home.

Nope, it's the other way, pal.

Guys? Could you decide on the way?

I have to go hear my punishment.

Bye.

Thanks for a great party, spitz.

Whatever trouble you get into, it was worth it.

Mom, I want to let you know -

Josh and adam already told me everything.

They did?

I can't believe mitzie left like that.

And I can't believe how responsible you were

During her absence - up until tonight, that is.

It was really hard, mom, I had to -

You don't have to tell me, sharon.

Running a house, buying groceries, juggling work...

I do it all the time.

I know how hard it is.

I really appreciate that you didn't want to disturb me

On my vacation...

You were so excited about it,

I didn't wanna ruin it for you.

But having a blowout party like this in a house with no adults,

Is not only wrong, it's dangerous.

So, am i... Grounded for life?

No curfew extension.

Mom!

For the next three months.

After that, we'll talk about it.

We will?

Okay. That's fair.

Now I have to go talk to adam.

He should've known better.

Don't be too hard on him, either.

Hey, mom?

Yes, honey, what is it?

The next time you go on vacation,

I'd like you to act a little more responsibly.

What do you mean?

Sunblock!

Touche.

So, in the end, we all got burned.

Josh and adam got their own punishments

For aiding and abetting,

And mitzie got an earful about 'responsibility'.

I told mom that the best way to guarantee

This would never happen again

Was to take me to hawaii with her next time.

But she assured me she wouldn't be vacationing

For at least another six years.