06x05 - Pageant Problems

[bunniefuu]

[theme music]

THEME SONG: Sam,
Clover, Alex, whoo!

We arrive in the fashion world.

We are Totally Spies.

Genuine secret agents.

But we never give into fear.

Sam, Clover, Alex, whoo!

We win every day of
the year S-P-I-E-S!

We are Totally Spies.

Just a drop should
be sufficient.

Huh?

Excellent.

[laughter]

Preliminary findings show thatthe WOOHP age reversing serum

is a success.

Pending a few more trials,it should be off and running.

[whistling]

Being a journalist is notsimply about telling a story.

Being a journalist isabout uncovering the truth.

Ooh, this guy is good.

Your assignment is
to write an expose

for the school paper
uncovering some kind

of injustice in the world.- Hm?

Uh-oh.

Looks like it's spy time.

I'll catch the
rest of this later.

With a little help from thepen recorder hologram, that is.

Now, let's talk aboutthe meaning of injustice.

[screaming]

[thud]

Hey, looks like we
all got the same alert.

A break in at the
WOOHP experimental lab.

I hated to leave
journalism class.

The professor was just goingover our first assignment.

You think that's bad?

We were just debating
slingback versus pumps

in advanced shoe theory.

Now I'll have to wait
until after the mission

to find out which to wearto a semi-formal occasion.

Oh, well, actually
I don't mind so much.

Pop quiz in animal grooming.

I sure hope my hologram studied.

Huh?

Prepare to be WOOHP-ed!

[screaming]

[siren]

Uh-oh!

We gotta turn off the securitysystem before it turns us off.

I'm a little stuck in here!

No one beats me at limbo!

That's as low as I can go.

Don't worry,
girls, I've got this!

Oh no!

Huh?

[screaming]

Phew!

Now where is Jerry?

[screaming]

[knocking]

Jerry!

Sorry, girls.

I seem to have
misplaced my ID card.

And I thought I was
the forgetful one.

[laughter]

Huh?

Oh my!

My age reversing serum is gone!

But this is new!

I definitely would
have remembered

a diamond encrusted tiara.

Let me see.

I don't know.

After all, good
accessories like this

don't grow on trees, Sammy.

Ooh, a red hair!

OK, I might be more
grossed out if this

weren't an awesome clue.

We'd better analyze
that hair right away.

It says the hair belongs toBertha Bombshell, a 55-year-old

woman from Liverpool, England.

Why, Liverpool's
where I spent my youth.

You had a youth?

[laughter]

Oh, sure he did.

Everyone has one.

So, did you know Shakespeare?

[laughter]

Will We'll go to
England to check out

this Bertha chick right away.

Ahem!

You'll need these.

Binocular sunglasses for whenyou really need to get up

close and personal,sugar-free hot and spicy gum,

now hotter and spicier thanever for the optimal sweating

effect, a web sling
ring for hitting baddies

with sticky webbing, and
a super strong titanium

hair clip that keeps hair andanything else firmly in place.

Oh, perfect!

OK.

Then off you go.

Wait!

In case we get to
meet the queen.

I don't want to
be under dressed.

WOOHP away!

[screaming]

[beeping]

Huh?

That's it!

Bertha's house.

Now, to come in for a landing.

[screaming]

We've got rain!

[screaming]

Join hands!

Great idea, Sammy!

OK, that was intense.

Look, an air duct!

We should be able to
slip inside no probs.

I don't know, it
looks a little small.

No worries, the
hot and spicy gum

should get us nice and sweatyso we can slide on through.

Maybe we need
another piece of gum?

Or not!

Is it hot in here or just me?

Oh!

[screaming]

Nice and sweaty should neverbe used in the same sentence.

Are you seeing
what I'm seeing?

I think I've died and
gone to pageant heaven.

Check it out.

Here's Bertha winning the MissTeen Crumpet England title,

and there's her winning
Miss Tower of London.

And look, there she is
taking first runner up

in the Miss Fish
and Chips contest,

losing out to Miss Flounder.

What could she possibly
want with Jerry's serum?

After all, she's totally
young and beautiful.

Yeah, except that thesewere all photos of Bertha

from over 40 years ago.

You don't think?

That Bertha took
the age reversing

serum in order to make
herself young again

and recapture her youth?

That's exactly what I think.

We've gotta call
Jerry right away.

Ouch!

Look, it's Jerry's WOOHP ID.

How odd that he would
have misplaced it here.

He didn't misplace it,
Bertha took it to gain

access to the WOOHP lab.

But how did she know
that it even existed?

Uh--

[beeping]

Hello, girls how's
the mission going?

We're at Bertha's house.

She's got your ID and
we think Bertha may

have used the serum on herself.

Oh dear.

That's extremely problematic.

If you girls don't get
to Bertha right away,

the situation could
become quite dire.

She's not home.

Where could she be?

I think I know.

The Miss Planetary Teen Pageantin Monte Carlo and it's today.

Excellent work, spies.

You're to go there right away.

What's wrong, Jer?

Yeah, it looks like
you've seen a ghost.

In a way, I have.

Bertha is someone
I used to date.

First you're telling
us you were young,

and now you're telling
us you're used to date?

[laughter]

She was BerthaCronkshell back in the day.

She was quite the lookerand had a great personality,

until she lost the Miss
Fish and Chips contest.

She could never
eat flounder again.

So that's how Bertha
knew about WOOHP.

She must've remembered Jerryworked there and followed

him to the experimental lab.

Yes.

This only makes the
situation more pressing.

I'll send the new and
improved WOOHP speedboat

to pick you up right away.

[thunder]

The boat is newly equippedwith sonic boom box missiles

that deliver a
rockin' musical boom,

powerful water spray jets strongenough to keep attackers away,

and an ultimate energy harpoonto help you catch everything

from sharks to bad guys.

Thanks, Jerry.

You're welcome, spies.

Now goodbye and good luck.

Wow!

This must be the place.

No way.

This is the best mission ever!

Welcome to the Grand VonThump Monte Carlo hotel.

Wow, It's Von Thump-tastic.

Woo hoo!

[cameras flashing]

OK, now I've gone to heaven.

Too bad we can't
enjoy any of it.

We've got a mission.

Maybe the injustice you
should be reporting on

is that we have
to work for Jerry

instead of getting to enjoya place as opulent as this.

Look!

The beauty queens
represent every nation!

[cameras flashing]

Whoa.

I may not be
meeting the Queen,

but I'm not going to be
the only one around here

without a tiara.

We gotta find
Bertha right away.

Jerry said it was
quite dire, which

means it must be really bad.

The only problem is
with so many redheads

in the competition
who all look similar,

how can we be positive
which one is Bertha?

Simple.

We go undercover as
beauty contestants.

[dog whimpering]

[dog barking]

[screaming]

Awesome!

Welcome everyone to thefirst ever Miss Planetary Teen

Contest, hosted by me, thevery grand Ronald Von Thump

at the grand Von Thump hotel,where every day is grand.

We're going to start
with the interview

portion of the
competition, conducted

by me, Ronald Von Thump.

Let the pageant begin.

[cheering]

Here's our first
grand contestant.

Please, tell us who you
are, where you're from,

and what your platform is.

Um, I'm Clover.

I'm from WOOHP-topia, andwell, when it comes to shoes,

my platform is the
higher the better.

I'm Sam.

As I learned in
journalism class,

my platform is truth,integrity, and reliable sources.

Thank you.

[applause]

Uh!

I, um-- like animals.

[cheering]

Hey, wanna see
my chicken dance?

[chicken noises]

[cheering]

Why don't you save that forthe grand talent competition?

[gasping]

My platform is doingwhatever it takes to get ahead!

Thank you, my dear, that's
very ambitious of you.

Did you hear that?

She said she'll do whateverit takes to get ahead.

And she has red hair.

I think we may have
found our villain.

[laughter]

[camera flashing]

There she is.

We'll need a strand
of her hair to match

the one we found earlier.

I'm all over it.

Oh!

I was thinking to get onefrom her brush, but that'll do.

Oopsie.

Whatevs, let's just
analyze it already.

[beeping]

It's a match.

She's old Bertha all right.

Or new Bertha, young Bertha?

Whatever Bertha
she is, we've got

to help her before the
serum does any damage.

Come on.

We know you broke
into WOOHP and stole

Jerry's age reversing serum.

And though we don't usuallygo around helping thieves,

you totally need help,because the serum you stole

is way experimental.

As in, it's about to
turn on you any second.

Age reversing serum?

I have no idea what
you're talking about.

Oh please, lady,
we are so onto you.

Yeah!

So you better do what wesay before it's too late.

Why should I believe you?

You're just jealous
pageant girls

trying to stop me fromwinning Miss Planetary Teen.

After all I've done to gethere, there's no way I'm going

to let you rob me of my title.

We aren't pageant
girls, we're WOOHP spies

and we're gonna help youwhether you like it or not.

[screaming]

Just once I'd like for oneof these experimental gadgets

to be a little
less experimental.

[laughter]

If you'll excuse me,
it's time for the talent

portion of the competition.

[laughter]

She's getting away!

And she's starting to mutate.

We gotta do something fast!

Aren't all of our
contestants grand?

As grand as me, Ronald
Von Thump, of course.

And now, for the talentportion of the competition.

Up first, Miss Denmark.

[gasping]

[cheering]

Wow, give a Von Thump roundof applause for that power

brand herring fishing, folks.

[music playing]

[laughter]

Thank you, Miss France,another grand performance.

Whoa!

[gasping]

Uhh, thank you,
Miss Australia.

And now, Miss England will graceus with her rhythmic gymnastics

tricks.

[gasping]

[cheering]

[screaming]

You are not grand enoughfor the grand Von Thump hotel.

You have been eliminated
from the competition.

If I'm not going to
win Miss Planetary Teen,

then no one else is either.

[screaming]

Whoa!

[crashing]

Well, the web sling ringmay have malfunctioned,

but the sticky
webbing works well.

Too well!

How are we ever gonna escape?

The tiara!

And you're thinking
about accessories

at a time like this why?

I'm not, I'm thinking aboutwhat the accessory is made of

and that's diamonds!

Way to use your head, Clover.

What can I say?

I have beauty and brains.

[crash]

Looks like things havegotten worse with Bertha.

It's time to bust our baddie.

[screaming]

Ew, way to experiment
with grossness, Jer.

Come on, girls,
we gotta stop her!

What the--

[screaming]

[laughter]

[screaming]

Ha ha!

[screaming]

Oh!

Hey, no fair!

[laughter]

I am young!

I am beautiful!

I am the only winner!

[crashing]

We need to dosomething, something big.

Like what, Sammy?

Like get ourselves
a little WOOHP power.

Alex, you stay here andmake sure no one gets hurt.

I'm on it!

Clover, come with me.

[screaming]

[crashing]

Ladies, evening gown
competition is this way.

[screaming]

No way!

[stomping]

[screaming]

The bad news is,Bertha's going ballistic.

The good news is, one of
our experimental gadgets

finally worked.

Whoops.

Launch the sonic
boom box missiles!

[screaming]

[crashing]

[screaming]

Uh oh!

Titanium hair clip,
do your thing!

Maybe the spray jets
will be more effective!

[gasping]

[laughter]

Yeah!

Yeah!

[screaming]

Whoa!

I will not be denied!

Ultimate energy harpoon!

[screaming]

And that concludes the talentportion of our competition.

Bertha.

Jerry, I'm sorry
I stole from you.

I just wanted one more win.

Can you ever
forgive me, darling?

Ahem.

Sorry, your pageant
days are over.

You'll soon be returning
to your natural age

once the remaining
age reversing serum

is removed from your system.

Pity you never got overlosing Miss Fish and Chips.

I was the better fish!

I can't believe what a totallycrazy mission we just went on.

All of that just
to be young again.

Speaking of
crazy, I've decided

on a topic for my expose--

the injustice of agecriteria in beauty pageants.

That's a great idea, Sammy!

[music playing]