02x28 - The Vincent Eaglewood Story

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All nine elites and

for years with a blood sucking leech.

He knows it. Too bad
that I want to get to know him.

Why don't you drink your coffee
where you get your bile?

All set.

Six weeks now.

He's been writing right along beside
getting the full protection.

This time not paying it, Golden said.

Why don't you ask him to join up with me?

I did ask you.

I made it pretty clear he's going to pay
his $40 just like the rest of them did.

This is no charity party.

I'm running.

You don't want to know

what he's mad that ill*gal would fail
because he is too smart for them.

He's a schoolteacher, you know? Yeah.

There's no schools
in this part of the country.

I know that he's headed for San Francisco.

Got himself a job teaching out there.

You know, him and me get along
just fine together.

The reason for that is
we both got what it takes up here.

Brains. What?

Why are you grubby old fleabag?

You've never been inside
a school room in your life.

I've got what is known as native
intelligence.

This an ego would told me that himself.

Oh, why don't you stop?

Hey, fella.

Well, I don't know
what's the matter with you.

Hello there.

Care to join me in a cup of coffee?

No, I don't want any coffee.

I come over here to tell you a few things.

You're not going to tag along
beside my train any longer.

You understand that?

Well, this is free American soil,
and I am an American citizen.

So although I hate to make you unhappy,
Major Adams, I think

I'll still tag along

for you.

Yeah.

Most of the wagons in your train
are in the same condition, Major.

I'm afraid the good folks
got hoodwinked back in Saint Joe.

Darn conniving sales people in the cities.

Let's say no
way to put a steel rim on the wagon wheel.

I'll only offer you to take the fishing
gear.

Well,
you got 46 rims hanging on the split wire.

I'm a set up before Joe.

I'd say minimum three days.

Oh, Lord.

That's working around the clock.

Looks like we have company coming, Major.

Levies coming to pay that $40 yields.

Hi there, boy.

Hello, Wooster.

You know the major, don't you,

Isabel Hawkes.

All right, gentlemen, bring us our rewrite
the ventilator.

Would my friend.

Finally decide to pay up?

You know, I came to say goodbye.

I don't like the route you're following,
Major.

Don't like the lot.

The route route trail.

So I guess this is where we part company.

Just what is it
you don't like about my route?

Oh, nothing.

I'm just taking the wash trail
around the hills up there.

Well, it comes out the same place.

All the differences you get there,
they literally do.

Yes, I know.

But by taking the long route around,
I won't run into the Indians.

What Indians?

Navajos.

You mean you haven't noticed all the signs
yesterday?

The notch trees
and before the camp leaving?

Oh, I thought it was obvious.

It's an unusual tribe.

I believe they're Arapaho descendants,
not pure Navajos.

Listen, boy,
I've been over this trail four times,

and I'm telling you
that there's no Indians up this far.

And all the Navajos are 200
miles out of here.

Supposedly, yes.

Nevertheless, there's
definitely an Indian tribe up ahead.

They usually head for the high terrain.

Plenty of wood for their fires.

And judging by the greenery, I'd say
there's a water freshened by that plateau

high up there.

You've been out west before, huh?

Now? Well, I. Have.

And I'm telling you, there's
no Indians up this far north.

Oh, yes, there are.

Oh, no, they're not.

Having your way.

Hey, let's come on in.

Well, I mean, you know, I've learned.

I guess I've gone through the hills.

This trip made.

You got to take the long way
around to the dry wash.

Who says so?

The Navajo have moved up into the hills
up there on the sides of the camp.

They're going to be there for a while.

What's the matter? Nothing.

Nothing at all.

Oh, shut up.

They look friendlier, don't they?

No, they're just. A couple of miners.

And the way they treated them,
I wouldn't call it friendly.

Just got to watch trail. Yeah.

How is it?

Well, it's kind of rocky here and there,
but no fallen timber

to be able to get through on her.

Hell, I suppose we might as well
hole up here for a few days.

We get these wheels fixed.

Plenty of good timber
around here for firewood, Bill.

Better get the wagon started.

Circle up. Right.

Yeah. You can get your poor job.

Get it set up.

I'll get a work detail on
and cut some wood for, you know, nature.

I. I don't believe we've met once.

An eagle, wood, whatever.

You're going to join up with the train.

Not unless he comes up
with $40 is not an idea.

It just occurred to me.

You have children on your wagon
train, don't you, Major?

Of course we have 30 of them.

But I'll make a deal with you.

I have a Bachelor of Science
degree from Trinity College.

I'll run a school for those children
in exchange for my passage.

Every time you make a stop,
I'll set up my school room.

How about it?

I don't make deals.

Say, maybe the kids.

Folks like to have a detour
for long months ahead. You know.

Anybody ask you anything?
No. Well, shut up.

It's none of my business either, Major,
but I think this gentleman's got quite

an idea.

I mean, you could look at it this way.

You'd be the first wagon master in history

that would have a traveling school
going right along with the train.

I'd be pretty good next fall.

Very early.

You might have something there. That

word gets back to Saint George.

Might cause quite a stir.

All right.

No, probably you got yourself a job.

You just pull that funny

looking out for two years in the line
and get to work on them kids.

Much obliged.

I'm sure
neither one of us will regret the bargain.

My of you measure.

I am, by the way you have yourself.

Is that so? Yeah.

Putting your brains
against. Here's an idea like that.

You know, I'd bet my life that way
we've got to join this railroad.

But I'd also bet
you was going to wind up by paying $40.

Get up there on your way
to where you belong.

What the devil you've written about here.

As bad as is.

Hey, now, you better take it easy.

That man liable to bust an artery
going out of the way you are.

You want to finished? Don't you?

Sure, but not at the expense of you
having a stroke.

That is, unless you know where there's

another wheelwright
between here and Sacramento, huh?

Look at this boat.

Here's your modern ways for you.

People
just don't take no pride in their work.

No more boating.

And I only am on wagons wheels instead
of sweating them on like they should have.

No wonder
your wagons is running on their wood.

And then thing I can do to help you.

Well, just keep the word coming.

We're burning up.

Especially great patriot in Cuba.

Coming

in 43 days.

We're going to be holed up.
What are your plans?

I thought I'd get some hot food,

spend the night here,
and then hit the trail in the morning.

That is, if it makes for the majors
approval. It's good enough

for the.

And then you look kind of bush.

But let me tell you for a.

While, you've got more important things
to consider, Major.

No need you doing a labor man's work.

Hello, Major. I'm a sheriff here.

I see they got the ladies
working out, huh?

Yes. With what little we can do.

Father. Mr.
Nielsen, how up is that for you?

You're holding a razor, Erika.

Not a broad ax. Oh, well, whatever.

Take your husband.

You'll soon
learn about honing his razor for him.

Right, Mr. Hennepin?

No time for nonsense like that, son.

We got work to do here
to get this extra money that been working.

Every man.

The camp's going full pitch.

Every man except one. That is.

I never seen him lift the finger.

Big help he is.

I am figure of a man probably better off.

Their spindly,
white looking fellow like him.

Couldn't lift no ax anyway.

Well, I don't know then

takes all kinds to make a world.

I never seen one like that before.

You see all of Jim cracks.

He got on that wagon of his microscopes
and all kinds of funny bottles and books.

He's a smart young fellow.

Work he's
doing is just as important as ours.

I figured my. Major.

I do believe you're proud of him.

Well, I didn't say I was proud of him.

What I meant
was that he's good for those kids.

And besides,
it keeps them out of our hair.

I think it's wonderful.

And the children love him,
and he certainly keep their minds busy.

I never went to school a day in my life.

Well, you're very smart standing around
with your act in your hand.

But you'll notice that the one who isn't
sweating is working with his head.

All right, class,

who is the president of the union?

Mr. Wooster?

I would like to answer that.

Mr. Eagle Wooden President Jack

Johnson.

That's it.

Well, I'll give partial credit for that.

He was president. Anyone else?

Elwood? Listeners Yes.

Grant Yes. And the Vice president?

Schuyler Colfax.

Good.

All right.

How many states are there in the Union

Army?

Gene 37.

Very good.

Now, I have good news for you.

I have located a patch of ripe
wild sugar beets down in that meadow.

And tomorrow, for everyone who knows his
homework, we'll make a field expedition,

and then we'll cook the beets
and make them taffy.

Oh, I got to go.

Can I go straight? What?

Elwood?

Elwood, Whenever we ask a favor

or ask someone to respond to us,
what is the magic word?

Please?

Now state the question again, please.

May I go? Please, Mr. Good.

That's better.

Yes, of course you may go.

You know, you almost all right, class.

Now, we'll have an hour of physics.

Today we're going to demonstrate
an experiment in the combustibles.

Elwood,
what are the combustibles we're using?

Sulfur and phosphorus.

Very good.

What I have in my hand
here is known as a Lucifer.

In times to come, this will replace
the flint for making fire.

The first one was made in 1827 by
a druggist in England named John Walker.

He made them from a compound of chloride
of potash and sugar mixed with gum, Arabic

and a touch of red phosphorus,
which I have here.

Now we dip the stakes into the mixture,

let it harden,

and we have

a Lucifer, or,
as it is also called, a lock of focus.

Now we have only to scratch this Lucifer

on a rough surface and.

All right, class,
everybody up to the work table.

Each of you take a beaker,
makes up a compound

and make your own Lucifer.

Surprise your mothers and others.

Donald, when you take these materials
to the work table.

Hello, Miss Erica.

Hello, Mr. Inglewood.

That was just fascinating.

I've never known before
how matches were made.

Oh, it's just a simple chemical trick.

But these graphic experiments
appeal to the children.

Makes them more interested
in the thought process.

Have you read all of those books?

Oh, yes. And more.

Oh, the wagon was overloaded as it was.

I had to leave
hundreds of books back in the East. Oh,

I don't mean to pry, mister.

You go with it.
Why are you going out west?

I accepted a job teaching
in a small college in San Francisco.

Oh, I think that's wonderful.

I admire men who use their heads.

The only men I know are only interested

in peddling merchandise
or working with their hands.

Well, we couldn't teach the children
in schoolrooms unless somebody

first built the schools
and did the printing, you know.

I suppose that's right.

You know, I've been to school.

I know how to read. Do you enjoy it?

Oh, yes. Do you like poetry?

Well,
I. I don't know. I've never read any.

There's some

I brought with me Elizabeth Barrett
Browning, Samuel Coleridge and others.

Would you like
me to teach you about poetry?

Who? Yes, I would.

Very much.

Mr. Haygood minds finished?

Yes. The hell would I be right there

tonight?

Perhaps after dinner? Yes.

Thank you.

I'd like to.

Goodbye.

Remember me when I am gone away?

On far away, into the silent land.

When you can no more hold me by the hand.

Nor I have time to go yet Turning Stay

Remember me when no more.

Day by day you tell me of our future
That you planned better by far

You should forget and smile
then that you should remember and be sad.

Oh, that's. Lovely.

I'm sure a woman wrote that.

Yes. Name was Christina Georgina Rossetti.

She lives in. England.

How you doing with a.

Book you can't read?

I'm looking at the pictures,
if you don't mind, Major, Sir.

I suppose, Mary,
you would gave me that, didn't you?

Tell me you couldn't read?

They would always scoff at the etiquette.

All right, John,
you keep on getting educated.

When you came on those Indians,
was there a w*r spirit in evidence?

Yeah, right in
front of the chief was pointed down.

It was in the ground.

Fine.

Well, I was part of it yet.

Anyway, two more days
and two more nights in this place.

And keep our fingers crossed.

You might have some luck and get out of

your.

Flat and fill her up and fresh water
for you.

Thanks, Bill.

The way this work's been going,

I figure we ought to be on the move
by noon tomorrow.

It takes us a whole extra day
to get around those hills,

not to put us down in the flats
in about 48 hours.

I'll meet you there at that creek
crossing the evening, the third day.

All right.

I'm not sure I feel right about leaving

you fellows here
with all those Indians around.

We'll be all right.

I'm going to give John Hawkes foreman
for an extra guard detail, and we'll.

We'll take care of it.
All right. We running a whole area.

I public areas, Major, the third day.

All right, Bill, you better get your pick,
your man, get your guard said.

Come on, Charlie.

All right, Shirley, I think that's enough
sugar beets.

Now, you girls and boys come up here
and watch

how this is done,

All right?

The first batch of taffy seems cool
enough now.

The first team of taffy pullers
will consist of Betsy, Diane, George

and Donald.

Are your hands are raised? Yes.

All right.

Donald and I will now demonstrate
how to build happy

hour.

Take this in here.

All right,
Now we pull and bring it together.

And we pull and bring it together.

All right, Diane, you team up with Donald
and George, team up with Betsy

and start pulling the rest of you children
while we're waiting for your taffy

to cool.

We'll have a class on bird law.

Just follow me, please,

To. Take this spot here,

I'll spread the rest.

A man down the line.

Fatal bird,

inhuman birds talking to each other

went around that wham!

What am I doing out here by myself?

Well, the.

Only thing to do is make a run.

I guess you're.

Well, Bill. Now run.

Do you like middle ground?

Let me call. Me.

Oh, wait a minute.

Hold up a minute.

They look like Indians to you.

Oh, oh,

oh, oh, oh.

That's my friend Vince.

You and your friends.

Elwood, what are you doing out here?

Who is Pop?

We were just doing bird law.
It must Riegelwood.

Our bird law class.

We just spotted a yellow bellied
sand thrush, and we were calling to him.

Hey, is anything wrong? Eagle would.

Don't you know that you shouldn't have
these kids as far away from the train?

This is Indian country.

Now you gather them up
and get them back to the wagons.

Elwood,
you come along now. All right, children.

We can talk about that class.

I'd love to join you.

And you get back to what
we built. Would we?

Come on, kids.

Hurry up.

Go on.

No, you can't blame us for carrying
on our normal schoolwork.

Pasty, white faced city man almost got
the children shot as your book learned.

And for you. All right, all right.

Let's just assume that you didn't know

that Indians
use bird calls to signal each other.

Now, let's leave it this way, will you?

There'll be no more classes in bird law.

Do you understand that? Yes, sir.

That's what you put in every month.

Keep your hair up.

Right. Oh,

just quiet.

Entire nation is always about.

Sleep and. Fighting over the candy.

The schoolteacher showed
him how to make pappy today.

Listen, Mr.

Teacher, are you deliberately trying
to wreck this whole wagon train?

I have never had this trouble before,
and I want to stop you.

You understand that?

But I don't care about your God.

Any excuses. Just do me one favor,
will you?

Keep those kids
and yourself out of my hair?

We've got work to do.

Come on,
Get back to your wagons at the port.

Let some water get the stuff out of you.

You're a misfit eagle. Good.

Why don't you pull out
and leave us in peace?

Spend the night.

You just hush up
and go about your business.

Oh, well, what's the new kid?

Don't
you ever talk to Mr. Eagle in that way?

Why don't you let an old walrus
get under your skin?

This.

I know he's
mostly old steam work. He said,

Well, I guess I haven't contributed
much in the way of helping.

Oh, that's not true, Vincent.

Children need
just as much help as adults do.

Of course they do.

You just keep on doing
what you've been doing. Next week.

I was going to read them. Ivanhoe.

I had such plans.

Oh, Vincent, there's no reason at all
for you to change your plans now.

No, the major's right.

They need every available man for work.

I'll just close up the school and

what help I can.

Vincent, you must do no such thing.

You'd break them children's heart.
If you've done that.

Of course you would.

They do seem to enjoy it.

The mother son effect on this wagon train.

You can't take one of them
stupid steaks and chop down a tree.

Now I see every man for his own
calling and years of teaching,

not chopping down trees.

Why, That's for all mothers like me,

Ben. They love your

classes and they love you.

Do you know that my brother Elwood is
just sure

that you hung the stars
and the moon in the sky?

Is that in that

talk talk party?

You have to have

taught me what to say.

Good God, Spirit not to watch by

trying to tell me that his people live

over those two sets of hills on
the other side,

men are quiet.

God, He wants to know
if we're going to his people's land.

All we want to do is pass through there.

And I know all the

big sun, far west.

Not idea

as his people are very poor

or keep their work.

I need,

he says.

Other white men come here and

continue

gardening, give clothes and supplies.

I think food,

that's what it is.

He wants to be paid off
for us to pass through his land.

Maybe they'll sell for some of that
very mean of ours.

We've got more sides we'll never use.

Hey, hey.

Tobacco,

hatchet, shovel.

Okay, here's your nog.

All right.

That's pretty plain.

He was right
for all his people in ammunition.

All right, Boy,

no, no more power

near you, are we?

None there.

How long

they'll

double sentries?

No. On right

as we always have to do that by hand.

Of course he does.

How would he do it?

Well,
if I showed you a way to replace this man,

that would still give you continuous
supply of forced air.

Would that help you? You bet it would.

Well, may we try?

Of course. Just keep out of our way.

No. On behalf of the children,
I want to thank you for this opportunity.

Don't mention it.

And I.

Like.

How you doing now? How?

Another 30 hours Major.

We ought to roll out of here
by noon tomorrow if things keep going.

Good.

You didn't go to bed.

Hello, Major Adams.

Hello.

We all love you, Mr. Riegelwood.

Yeah, Yeah, you do.

That's very nice to hear.

Let me tell you all something.

When you grow up,
some of you will become wives and mothers.

Some will become doctors,
lawyers, businessmen.

But remember this.

Of all the things you will do
or hope to do,

none is as great as the gift of love
from one human being to another.

You remember that. Is.

All right.

Attention, everybody.

I have something important to tell you.

Starting today,
we will apply all the things

we've been learning
to help Major Adams in his tasks.

We are social beings, and as such,

we will join in their joint social effort
to help the wagon train.

I've taught you about physics
and specific gravity.

We will apply that knowledge
to rig up a new bellows for Mr.

Reynolds, whose forge

I I've taught you about the combustibles
which wouldn't burn hotter and longer.

We will use that knowledge to show
the wood choppers which trees to select.

I will teach you how the Malayan natives
construct ingenious

detection devices
to warn them of approaching enemies.

But that is later the first project

to build a Roman style
automatic bellows for Mr.

Reynolds

economy class.

If I wasn't looking around
and I never believe.

It was first devised during the reign
of Emperor Claudius in Rome,

a mathematician named Felicitous
Aquarius invented it, oddly enough,

for his reward, he was sent into exile
on the island of Crete.

But do not think this man
was never heard of again.

For two years later,
he had invented the famous Snag proof

loan, which was sort of glorified
the homes of ancient Crete

last.

We have harnessed nature by utilizing
one of nature's greatest gifts gravity.

We will proceed with our next project.

Follow me.

Now there goes a man with brains, huh?

Yes, Brain.

Yes, sir.

In the Malayan jungles, wild beasts
and other men,

the savage natives are a constant
menace to the peace loving tribes.

All right, who can tell us
where the Malayan jungles are situated?

Elwood? In Malaya? Yes.

Well, I ask a foolish question.

You get a foolish answer, I suppose.

However, we'll go into that more fully
in our geography class on Friday.

Now, under the business at hand
to save Major Adam's trouble

and bother sending out guards
to watch for Indians,

we will construct some ingenious Malayan

detection devices.

This.

This appears
to be a likely point of entry.

Just stand back, please.

All right.

You boys went in with this rope.

All All right, class.

Under our next project, men,
pick up your tools over here,

and we'll dig our pit right here.

Oh, go.

All right, class.

Class.

Under our next project,

what types of trees
are the men cutting out in the woods?

Oh, Margene. Okay. And Grease
one. Correct.

And what do we have here?

A pine tree.

Very good. Pitch Pine.

The pitch pine is one of the slower
combustibles giving off a slow,

steady, burning flame that lasts twice
as long as oak, agrees Wood.

So we will cut this down, chop
it up, and illustrate to Major Adams

that he can get twice as much fire burning
twice as long using the pitch pine.

Now, which way
do we want the tree to fall?

Elwood

Away from the wagons that way.

Very good.

So we make the cut on the side.

We want the tree to fall, then back, lean.

I got a contraction.

We want to shut it. You bet it does.

Just like a Swiss watchmaker say,
just a man leaving the women.

Kids can work it.

Well,
maybe I underestimated that little fella.

Yeah,
you know that. Schoolteachers got brain.

A brain.

You know, brains, Brains.

We How you been told, buddy boy?

Throw the thing. But you do it here. Gene.

It's with the Swedish tree fellers.

Precision slice enables
exact placement of words at the ball.

No, You see that Mark
I got on the ground out there.

Yeah, well, fall right? Exactly there.

All it needs is a little touch here.

Indeed it bends, old boy.

A real. True deep, just little touch.

Oh, no, no, no, no.

Timber.

That's right.

Yeah,

a major.

Hold my breath here.

You just stay right straight.

You, you little pinhead, Bring me that.

I come over here all major.

I always try to teach the children to say
please whenever they ask for something

hard. Please do. This.

If you don't, I to do like I do.

Now's the time to hide
out till he cools off. Huh?

Why don't

you know it's worked for the millions.

I demand to see Major Adams.

You don't demand nothing, Mr..

Now you just climb up on that and drive.

Come on, move. You're getting off easy.

The trouble you caused around here.

Going on here.

Now, Erica, you just stay out of this.

Women got business in these matters.

Band and Ike,
Who do you think you are, Vincent?

You're not going to let them bully
you, are you? Yes.

Well, you just wait
until Major Adams hears about this.

Now, Eric.

Now, Major Adams is going to hear
all about this

just as soon as this
fellow's on his way out of here.

Come on,

I'll get along.

SCHOOLTEACHER Oh.

You listen to me better than Ike.

I run this.

I give the orders.

If you're any doubt in your mind
about that?

No, sir. But I don't understand.

After what he done to you.

That's between him and me.

You got a few more years
under that Harriers.

You understand that?

No, man.

That's a personal grudge. Endanger
another man's life.

And that's exactly what you've done.

You sent that boy out there
in Indian territory all by himself.

And I'm ashamed you.

I'm ashamed of all of you.

Let me tell you one thing.

The next time I catch any of you
acting together as a mob, I'm

going to kick you off with this train
every single solitary man that's involved.

Do I make myself clear.

Major?

Some of the children is gone.

Well, what kind of talking, sir?

Now, you tell the major.

Go on to spank the daylights out of you.

Tell him what the children went.
We want to bring Mr.

Good back, that's all.

I'll tell him They want to get them

all. Where?

I don't know.

Bill.

Get our boys together
in a couple of weeks.

Most to you will stay inside this circle.

We'll leave some extra guards here.
You'll be all right.

We'll get those kids back home, Worry.

We figured those kids

would have caught up with Englewood soon
after he left camp.

Knowing the direction he took.

After a shortcut to intercept
him seemed in order.

But we reckoned without the Navajo.

I knew that the minute we'd top that rise
in size wagon,

with no kids running around,
they had to be over the hill.

Beyond Tiger Woods
trail in the Indian camp.

His book plan
was good for some things, sure,

but it didn't tell him that he was heading
right into the jaws of the enemy.

The lookouts said posted told me that. Oh,

oh, oh, oh.

Mr. Inglewood,

I want you to turn around
and go back to the wagon train.

I've got to apologize to you
for what happened.

I'm sorry,
but I didn't know anything about it.

I won't return unless they apologize.

There's no time for that nonsense now.

I'm afraid
the Navajos have got a bunch of our kids.

We're going after them now. My children.

But how could they have?

Seems like
they went out to bring you back.

Probably got lost
and the Navajos picked them up.

I want to help.

I don't suppose
you know how to use a g*n, do you?

Oh, yes.

I was captain of the r*fle team
at Trinity College.

I want to medals. You want to see?

No, no, never mind.

They'll give me your r*fle.

Better off with us.

And he would be out here
wandering around by myself.

Major, there'll be men hurt in this one.

They most likely, yes.

What I'm trying to say, Major, is
it was my fault.

The children were captured.

They went out looking for me.

I feel I should get them back.

Or at least have a try at it
without endangering all your lives.

Well, if you've got any idea how to do it,
I'm sure.

Listen, Nelson.

Well,
I don't know how exactly, but I feel.

I should go in and have a talk with them.

Can you use sign language?

No, but I majored in tribal languages
at Kennedy College,

so I speak the whole time fairly well.

Why the devil didn't you tell us?

So when I was having all that palaver
with him.

You never asked me

tape.

I'd rather not use this.

I'll. I'll just use my head.

The way to do it, Major,

if you don't mind my saying so
as to hit them hard with every g*n we got.

One man can't pull it off.

Well, what is there to lose?

Just give me a half an hour
to talk with them.

There's always time to resort to this.

If I don't come back.

What they do with white
men is not very pretty.

I know they bury them alive.

And you still want to go in there?

Yes, I do.

All right.

I'll give you just exactly 30 minutes.

If you're not back here by then,
we're coming in after you.

Please do.

Well, children.

I've come to take you home.

Don't worry. I just have to talk to
the chief here for a moment.

Oh. Oh,

Coming.

Up to a knuckle. Coming up.

And that's Iroquois.

If there's anything you're not, it's
certainly Iroquois

out there.

Hey, good morning to each
and every one of you.

May your son, God, be kind to all of us.

You are the chief, sir.

Oh, oh, oh, oh, yes.

Oh, I greet you Fine.

Band of men, handsome women, good people,

friendly people.

Yes, Friendly.

Occasionally.

You know.

Oh, r*fles.

No, no. I brought gifts
better than r*fles.

Hey, now, stop that.

Those are my possessions.

And you can't be.

That'll

teach you not to fool around
with other people's possessions.

This was a graduation gift from my mother.

There's a lot of sentiment
attached to this now.

Thank you. To keep your hands up.

Now, let me show

you some fascinating things.

Say we come in peace.

That's no way to act.

Why can't you be gracious and hospitable?

What's wrong with you?

Fine way to that.

Very bad training as children
put away those things.

Okay.

Now, sir, allow me to display the presents

I brought for you.

Oh. Oh,

oh, oh, oh, oh.

Oh, oh, oh, oh.

But not everybody can work.

One of those takes a magic man
like me. He.

This is for you, Chief.

It's all yours.

But wait.

I have other things.

Here's a miracle for you.

Genuine Swiss miracle.

What do you make of that, Chief?

Truth?

You're not getting the rhythm.

Any man that.

It takes little things
and makes them very big.

Big, large, very big. What?

Oh, look at my eye.

There is a.

Miracle for you.

But wait, you haven't seen anything yet.

Oh, I will now

demonstrate my affinity
with your son up there.

Look at this, Chief.

Red phosphorus dug from the earth
and sulfur

like the smell. And.

Now the magic glass.

You see the sun up there.

The sun sun in the sky.

I bring the sun down to earth here
at my bidding.

Watch

this.

Stand back, everybody.

Any minute now,

all you better stand back.

Stand

down.

Cool idea.

Anyhow, I had my head examined
for letting him go in there.

Now, time's up.

Let's go.

So what you need?

What could I do?

They made me a right God.

Well, how do I tell

Mr. Ego?

What would you get
ready to pull in the line?

Please, Please.

Why are we getting polite?

Oh, button up your lip
and get out of here.

I got.

Fell all of your.

Points on our way down.

Okay, Let's go. Planning.

Come on.

Hurry up. Let's get.