01x06 - Insecurity In Security

[bunniefuu]

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♪ ♪

GREEN:
Wow, it's just like that time

on the worm farm when I got
caught in the worm silo

- and I had a crush on my neighbor...
- CYAN: Echo.

- And I wanted...
- YELLOW: What are you doing, Cyan?

CYAN: Oh, I thought
maybe there'd be an echo

because the lights are out.

BLACK:
That doesn't sound right,

but we can test that hypothesis.

- BLACK: Echo. - CYAN: Echo.
- GREEN: ...so I decided

- not to kiss any worms.
- BLACK: Holy crap, it worked.

PURPLE:
My fishmate Heracles is dead

and the oxygen system is down

and we need to fix it now
before we all die!

GREEN: So, yeah, I
decided not to kiss any worms

because I didn't know if kissing
new worms would be adultery.

CYAN:
Your fishmate is dead?

YELLOW: I didn't even know
you had an alive fishmate

until right now,

but the grief is so immense
that it's left me numb.

I mean, literally can't feel
my fingers. [Chuckles]

Look at this. Look at this.

PURPLE: [retches] It's
just a fishmate, it's fine.

- CYAN: It's not fine.
- The more important thing

is for you all to come with me
to the Oxygen Room

so we can get you
in your right minds again.

RED [slurring]:
Whoa, there, Purple.

You're doing the cap... uh, uh...
oh, no, I'm the captain.

I'm the captain here,

and I captain you all to do
for the oxygen house.

[all moaning]

[Red chuckles]

RED: I'm leading.
It's good to leading.

- Oh, uh, this way.
- [all moaning]

PURPLE:
Okay, take a deep breath, everyone.

[all inhaling sharply]

[air hissing]

- PURPLE: ...and release.
- [all exhale]

All right, how are we feeling?
Is everyone okay?

- YELLOW: Yeah.
- RED: Yeah. CYAN: I felt normal

the whole time.

PURPLE: Oxygen
deprivation leads to hypoxia.

That's why we let ourselves
get so loopy.

CYAN:
I can't believe we didn't know

we were all running
out of oxygen.

GREEN: Hey, so, silly
question, I don't know...

I didn't mention
anything about, like,

worm kissing or anything, did I?

BLACK:
Oh, did you ever.

- [Green hyperventilating]
- [air hissing]

I-I just didn't want
to be a home-wrecker.

Uh, worm-wrecker...
uh, home-worm.

- [nervous chuckle]
- PURPLE: Stop. That oxygen

will keep our minds clear
for another,

I don't know,
eight minutes and 44 seconds.

- We need to fix this fast.
- BLACK: Don't know how we're going

to fix it without the lights.

YELLOW: Hey, what
happened to the lights, anyway?

CYAN: Maybe the lights
need oxygen to breathe, too.

BLACK [sighing]:
Cyan...

RED:
Let's all calm down.

Look, they were definitely
both freak accidents.

Honestly, Purps, it was
probably your fishmate.

PURPLE: Can we please
stop talking about Heracles?

RED: These systems aren't
designed for any foreign entities,

so your ill*gal fishmate
probably gunked it up

with all of their long poops.

PURPLE: Long poop... we didn't
get an alert about oxygen being low.

- There's something else.
- RED: I'm just saying,

it's against the rules to
smuggle any petmates on board,

so without them, our oxygen
supply would have been fine.

If you hadn't been so selfish,
your fishmate

- would still be alive.
- Oh! So now it's my fault?

RED:
It is your fault.

- We have rules for a reason.
- Oh, look at big Captain Red,

- deflecting the blame again...
- RED: And having an antiauthoritarian streak

- doesn't make you better...
- ...just like MIRA taught you to do.

- PURPLE: You bootlicking worm.
- ...than the rest of us.

GREEN: Whoa. Let's not
go bad-mouthing worms.

- RED: ...really not a huge deal.
- PURPLE: You haven't changed at all.

PURPLE:
I wish you were dead!

- [gasps]
- [all gasp]

PURPLE:
[stammers] I...

RED:
Purple, that's enough.

This is your captain speaking.

We're splitting into groups
and fixing our ship.

Yellow, Cyan, Black,

get to Electrical
and turn on the lights, stat.

I'm going to Admin
to enter one side

of the oxygen override code

to get our systems
back up and running.

Green, Brown, Purple,
you stay here

and enter the other override
code once I get to Admin.

- Got it?
- PURPLE: Uh, you're putting me in time-out?

RED:
No. Uh, actually, yes.

GREEN: Does that mean
Brown and I are in time-out, too?

RED:
No, uh... yes.

Uh, you're time-out-adjacent.

Keep your eye on that keypad.

You three get going.

I am good
at being captain, okay?

And I'm good at being alive.

And I'm especially good
at being both at once.

No biggie!

[Purple sighs]

BLACK: I can't believe
we almost died back there.

CYAN: I felt like we
were really breaking

some new ground interpersonally.

BLACK: I used to think
death was really beautiful.

Turns out, it's just a bunch
of vibrant colors

and feeling like I belong.
Disgusting.

CYAN: But it was nice that we
were all getting along so well, right?

BLACK: Cyan, of course
we were getting along so well,

my brain was at 20% oxygen.

I would have gotten along
with one of Green's kiss worms.

[Cyan gasps]

[Black grunts]

Uh, what are you doing?

CYAN: What am I doing?
What are you doing, Black?

- BLACK: What?
- You've been horrible to me this whole trip.

BLACK:
It's not a trip, it's a job.

CYAN: All you ever say is,
"Cyan shouldn't be here this"

and "Cyan was
a budget hire that,"

and I don't deserve it.

It's not my fault
you hate rocks now.

And you know what?
I'm not bad at my job.

I like my job,

and I'm good at doing it.

Yeah, I've been taking notes

and checking vibes
and researching Ore

while you won't even take
a second look at Ore-Plus,

even though it's special.

It's special ore.
That's what "plus" means!

BLACK: It's all gonna get
melted down anyway, who cares?

CYAN:
You cares! You should cares!

But you don't cares
about anything anymore.

I can fix the lights by myself.
[crying]

BLACK:
Geez. What was that all about?

Fixing the lights requires
two competent crewmates.

That's why Red had to send
three of us.

YELLOW: Well, you've
been kind of an a-hole.

- BLACK: What?
- YELLOW: I didn't always like Brown.

In fact, I was
a real spicy meatball.

Too many cooks
in the kitchen, right?

What's another chef gonna do
that I can't?

BLACK:
Exactly. Wait...

But Brown listens to me.
Brown keeps me grounded.

When we stand
on each other's shoulders,

literally and metaphorically,

we can reach the real
high-quality guanciale,

literally and metaphorically.

And we all know
the best guanciale lives

on the top shelf,
because the top shelf is where

the air pressure is
the least likely to interfere

with the meat's depth of flavor.

Plus, when you factor in
humidity...

BLACK:
What are you even talking about?

YELLOW:
See? This is why I need Brown.

- BLACK: Where are you going?
- YELLOW: Got to fix the lights.

BLACK:
Yeah, you're right, let's go.

YELLOW:
Said it yourself.

Just need
two competent crewmates.

We'll be fine.

♪ ♪

GREEN:
Permission to be vulnerable?

[Purple sighs]

GREEN:
Okay, here I go.

Um, I grew up
around a lot of animals.

Mostly worms.

What I'm trying to say is,

I know what it's like
to lose a petmate.

[stammers] It might not seem
like a big deal to other folks,

but... are you okay?

- Purple?
- PURPLE: Huh?

Yeah, sure. I'm fine.

GREEN: Purple... I know
you're going through a lot

because of Heracles,
and on top of that,

whatever's going on
between you and Red,

so... I give you permission
to be vulnerable.

Tell me about...

PURPLE:
I said I'm fine.

Everything's fine.

You know what? I'm not fine.

Crewmates are dying,
and maybe Heracles...

[forlorn groan]

If I hadn't brought them...

This mission has been
really stressful

and I'm having a really bad time

and it's all because Red...

[sighs]

♪ ♪

We were actually interns
together, back in the day.

We were both so happy
to have somebody to work with,

someone to rely on.

We didn't know it at the time,
but the whole place was

understaffed, underfunded,
basically running on fumes.

When the reactor started
melting down,

Red and I did all we could,
but we were just two interns.

It wasn't up to us.

Nothing was working.

Somehow, nobody died,
but the nuclear fallout

made the whole colony
uninhabitable.

All because MIRA wanted
to cut corners.

Everyone had to leave.

And the crewmates were
displaced.

It wasn't like MIRA was
gonna help them relocate.

The company wanted
to cover it up.

I wanted to blow
the whistle, but Red...

[sighs]

Red stayed silent.

So I got the boot,

and as the cherry on top
of the nuclear waste sundae,

MIRA made sure no one else
would hire me after that.

So the only reason I'm here,
the only reason I have any job,

is because of Red's...
I don't know... pity handout?

I guess I should be
grateful, but I...

...I hate that I'm working
for MIRA again.

And all Red can talk about is
how amazing they are.

Red doesn't even seem to care.

And I don't know how
I'm supposed to feel, but...

I don't think I'm ready
to forgive Red just yet.

GREEN: Oh! They
must have fixed the lights.

- [alarm beeping]
- PURPLE: [gasps] Huh?

[clears throat]

And it seems like Red made it
to the other keypad safely.

All right, here we go.

[mumbling]:
One, two, three, four, five.

- [keypad buzzes]
- Huh?

GREEN:
What's going on?

[Purple gasps]

GREEN:
What is it?

PURPLE:
This is why we never got

an alert about oxygen levels.

The wire. It's been cut.

GREEN:
Ah!

[Purple grunting]

Okay, that should do it.

COMPUTER:
Systems online.

PURPLE: [relieved sigh]
Oxygen's working.

[all shout]

BLACK:
Sup, losers. And Purple.

- GREEN: I thought you were an alien.
- BLACK: What?

PURPLE:
Hang on. Where is everyone else?

[stammers]
Where are Yellow and Cyan?

BLACK:
Oh, they got all huffy

and said they'd take care
of the lights themselves.

RED:
What you talking about?

- ALL: Ah!
- BLACK: Work stuff.

RED: Uh, okay, well,
everything's back online now.

All thanks to my delegation
and leadership efforts.

[chuckles]
I told you I was good at this.

PURPLE:
Actually, it's not that simple.

RED:
Look, Purple,

I know you've had
an "emotional" day, but...

PURPLE: The oxygen system
didn't just break on its own.

RED:
What are you talking about?

GREEN [French accent]:
There's a saboteur onbeurd!

RED:
Wait, there's a second impostor?

PURPLE:
And it wasn't Heracles' fault

that things went wrong,
like someone was saying.

[all yell]

- BLACK: Oh, hey, Yellow.
- [Yellow shouts]

- RED: Yellow?
- YELLOW: Cyan!

- BLACK: Cyan?
- GREEN: No, Yellow.

YELLOW:
No, Cyan! Cyan's dead!

[all gasp]

♪ ♪

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Keybot, Keybot, Keybot. Keybot.

Chirp.