02x52 - Graphic Email Revenge

[bunniefuu]

I had seen him
showing sexual videos of myself.

Revenge porn.

She lies all the time.

[Joangela] He sent this to
my boss at 1:30 in the morning.

[Judy]
It's a very graphic email to her boss.

Why would you send this to her boss?

[narrator]
This is Judy Justice.

[theme music playing]

[narrator]
David Self is suing his ex-girlfriend,

Joangela Strowger,
for a phone and gas money.

[bailiff]
Court come to order. All rise.

Have a seat, please.

-Case 2087, Self versus Strowger.
-Thank you.

You're welcome.

-Your last name is Self?
-That's correct.

[Judy]
There are two parts to your claim.

I'm going to get and just...

-take hands out of your pockets.
-Sorry about that.

I'm going to get and dismiss one of
them and get to the one that is important.

You and the defendant
were in a dating sort of relationship.

That dating relationship
sort of continued for a while.

At some point you had
an argument and she left you.

She stranded you.
That was in July of 2022.

You said you had an argument,
she drove off and she left you stranded.

You had to get a hotel for the night.
You had to pay your friend for gas money.

-[babbles]
-[David] Correct.

Forget that.
That's what happens when

-you have a fight with your girlfriend.
-Okay.

[Judy]
Have a fight with your girlfriend...

-How old are you?
-I'm almost 40.

Well, for someone almost 40,
they know how to get home.

-Correct.
-[Judy] Okay, good.

So let's get to what your lawsuit is.
It's really about a phone.

A phone that you say the defendant

is responsible for losing or taking.

-Taking... I have video of...
-[Judy] Taking.

And the defendant in some way
acknowledges that she disposed of

your phone and she says
she had very good cause

to dispose of your phone.

She's going to tell me why.

So I'm going to
get some dates from you, Mr. Self,

-Okay.
-and I'm going to at the same time,

explore what I see is her
answer and her counterclaim.

Okay.

[Judy]
Now, after the two of you had broken up,

Miss Strowger was at a bar.

And she was at a bar on what date?

[David]
I would say that would be the 16th.

It was actually the 9th.

-August 2.
-[Judy] Eight two. You see how...

She knows better about
these dates than I do.

Well, but it's your case.

I understand that. Als...

So let's say she's right,
that it happened on August 2nd.

-[David] Okay.
-And at that time,

the two of you were
no longer dating or a couple?

Yes.

And you were going to a bar,
and when you got there,

was the defendant there?

Not that I was aware of.
At the particular time.

[Judy]
You didn't see her?

I didn't see her, no.

[Judy]
What time did you get to the bar?

[David]
I'd say about four or five.

[Judy]
Anybody else at the bar?

There's quite a bit of people there,
to be honest.

-[Judy] How many people?
-I'd say about 30.

[Judy] Anybody you knew?

Quite a bit of people.

Of the 30 people there,
how many people did you know?

I'd say at least ten.

But you indicate when you got there,
you did not see the defendant.

No, I wasn't paying
attention to her at the particular time.

Well, you say that there were


-[David] Correct.
-[Judy] Ten of whom you knew,

so you knew some people,
and this was former girlfriend of yours

with whom you had been
close association and intimate, right?

-Correct.
-[Judy] And you didn't see her.

Well, they have a back patio,
and then they also have

the indoors and everything like that.

And then they have
a front area, too, as well, so...

Tell me, Mr. Self,
when did you in fact see her?

Is when she was, uh, doing the bowling,

and that was a little bit
later on when I was playing pool.

[Judy]
About what time was that?

I don't know,
probably like seven or eight.

So you had been in the bar
for between three and four hours.

Yes.

Okay, so now you're at
the bar for three or four hours,

and are your friends there,
these ten people that you knew?

Yes.

Now, I'm gonna go back a little bit
to the breakup that you two had...

Gotcha.

[Judy]
Was it a mutual breakup?

So what ended up happening here,

I think that, uh, we had a disagreement
on the 23rd in Norco,

and she left me stranded there,

so I had to get another friend,
give me a ride back to my, uh, residence.

I can't understand a word you're
saying because you're speaking too fast.

-On the 23rd...
-Better.

She, uh, left me at a barbecue

and, uh, had a friend give me a ride
back to Riverside, California.

-[Judy] A friend who was at the barbecue?
-[David] Yes, that's correct.

[Judy]
Okay, so you were at a barbecue with her?

That's correct.

[Judy] And that was...

how far away from
where you were living in Riverside?

I'd say about 20 minutes away.

And your friend was at the barbecue,

and after you had an argument with her,

your friend took you home.

-Prior...
-No, no, not prior.

Is that what you just said to me?

In Norco, California...

is when she left me at a barbecue

and then at the bar, or when we're down at

Huntington Beach on the 30th,
she left me.

I have video that shows all that.

[Judy] All right. I asked you whether
the breakup was acrimonious.

-So one time she left you at a barbecue,
-[David] Yes.

that where you knew
somebody who drove you home.

Correct.

And you didn't stay in a motel,

-you didn't do anything.
-No, I didn't.

-Okay, good. And then she did it again.
-[David] Yes.

Is that what you're saying to me?

-Yes.
-[Judy] And the second time was when?

-It was on the 30th.
-[Judy] Okay.

And that is the time when you
say you had to spend some time over...

-So after she left you the second time,
-Yes.

[Judy] is that when you
no longer communicated with her?

-That's correct.
-[Judy] Did you say,

"Why did you leave me?
How dare you leave me?"

You didn't have any communication
by text or phone

or anything else
is what I'm asking you.

So her cousin
is supposed to play in a band,

showed up late, she was upset
and just about showing up late. Uh...

-[Judy] Who showed up late?
-We did, because I was with her.

-[Judy] I just need a date of that.
-The 30th.

I have on the 30th.

So she was upset that you
showed up late and...?

We showed up late to her cousin's thing.

They're supposed to be at 2:00.
We got there about 2:05.

She's upset about that.
When we were driving down the road,

because we're trying to find parking,

which everybody was around and everything.

She was getting upset and... um...

Getting angry with another driver

to the point where
I had to pull the e-brake

to stop the vehicle as I thought
she was going to run into it.

[Judy] And then what happened?

I tried to deescalate the
situation as much as possible.

Mind you,
there's two minors are in the back.

I would just like to know
was the breakup...

I'm trying to figure out
was the breakup acrimonious

or mutual on the 30th.

Who broke up with whom?

-She left me.
-[Judy] She left you there?

-That's correct.
-[Judy] On the 30th.

After she left you there on the 30th,

did you have any communication with her?

-I was done with it.
-[Judy] Just a second.

So after the 30th,
you didn't see her or communicate with her

until you saw her on August 2nd,
is what you're saying?

Yes, I didn't see her again.

[Judy] Didn't see her again or
communicate with her from the 30th of...

-July.
-[Judy] July until August 2nd.

A few days later?

-Yes.
-[Judy] Is that what you're saying?

I believe so.
I can look at my records right now.

Just to see... but I don't believe
I give her a call or anything like that.

Okay.

And when you saw her
at the bar that you were in,

you saw her later between six and seven.

-She was bowling.
-Mm-hmm.

"Uh-huh" is not an answer.

-The answer is yes.
-[David] Yes. Yes.

She was bowling. You were playing pool.

Correct.

And what this is about is your phone,

-Yeah.
-[Judy] which you're missing.

-Yes.
-[Judy] So tell me about the phone, sir.

So I have a Note10 Plus,
that was behind the bar at the time,

instead of going to my vehicle,
which I typically charge...

Just a second. So you were
charging your phone at the bar.

[David] Correct.

[Judy] When had you
put the phone in to charge it?

Later on that evening,
around ten, maybe eleven, I'm guessing.

-[Judy] Ten or eleven.
-I'm guessing...

[Judy]
Just a second. Ten or eleven? So...

Because there's
a few times I actually go in there,

I charge it,
then I use it for a little bit.

Well, but you saw it the last time...

I apologize for that.

Last time you saw it, you plugged it in,
it was like ten or eleven.

So now you've been in the
bar from four to ten or eleven?

Yes.

[Judy] And she was there
at least as far as you know,

-from about seven to ten or eleven?
-[David] Yes.

-Keep going.
-So, uh, I charge it. And uh...

[Judy] What were you
doing with the phone all evening?

-Talking, texting.
-[Judy] Mm-hmm.

Texting and stuff like that.

-Texting?
-[David] Communicating.

-To whom?
-Friends.

-[Judy] "Friends."
-What's going on, you know,

social media, all that good stuff.

Okay, go ahead.

So anyways, uh, I was playing pool,

I went outside and had a cigarette.

And then that's when she, uh,

at 12:33 is when she
ended up with her girlfriend

looking around all this other stuff.

Like I said before, I have the
video that shows that on the camera.

Would you like to see it?

So far, I'm not understanding you.

So why don't you explain
it to me and then you can show it to me.

So far, it's all a jumble.

-12-12:30 at night, you have...
-12:33 is when she stole the phone.

-[Judy] Is when she stole the phone?
That's correct.

[Judy]
And you bought the phone when, sir?

-[David] About two years ago.
-[Judy] And how much did you pay for it?

I don't know.
I think it was like $800, $700?

[Judy] Well, this is your case.

How am I supposed to figure out...
you're suing for a phone that she took?

How am I supposed to figure out how much

she owes you for the phone if she took it?

I don't know how much I paid for it,

but I know it resales for about $1200.

-Show me!
-So I got the case cover.

-What kind of phone was it?
-Note10 Plus.

The Samsung Galaxy Note10 Plus
is typically $395 to $512.

At this point in time, yes.

Well, that's what
it would cost you to replace it.

-Okay.
-Now, you do not deny

that you put your hands
on his phone in a manner

in which you intended to
have it removed from his custody,

which means, according to you,
you took the phone out of the charger

-and threw it in the trash
-Correct.

[Judy] or trash someplace.

So far, Mr. Self,
the defendant acknowledges

-that she took the phone and trashed it.
-Okay. All right.

[Judy] And I want you to make sure
that you answer my questions carefully.

While you were at the bar
between seven and twelve,

did you ever show anyone at the bar

a photograph of the defendant?

No, I did not.

Now I'll hear you.

Um, so I got to the bar around 8:30
because I played darts that night.

I did not see the plaintiff.
Um, I was playing bowling.

There was an arcade game,
and when he came in,

he started showing videos of me.

That's incorrect.

Don't speak.

♪♪

There is a protective order in place,

and if you want to vacate
that protective order

because you question service,
you better do so.

In the meantime, I suggest you stay
very, very far away from her.

♪♪

♪♪

[narrator]
Dave Self claims his ex-girlfriend,

Joangela Strowger,

owes for a phone and gas money.

Joangela's countersuing for harassment.

Now, did you see him showing
videos of you to anyone at the bar?

I saw him showing videos.

-[Judy] But didn't see what they were.
-No.

-I would never do such a thing.
-Shh!

Apologize.

-Could you stand up, please?
-[Amy whispering] Absolutely.

Do you know Mr. Self?

-I do.
-[Judy] Tell me your name.

-Amy.
-[Judy] Amy what?

Clagg.

[Judy]
Were you at the bar on the 2nd of August?

I was.

And you know the defendant?

Yes, she's a friend of mine.

[Judy] And what about Mr. Self?
How do you know him?

[Amy] As her ex-boyfriend.

Be careful of what you... answer me.

Did you see what Mr. Self

was showing on his phone?

I did not see what
he was showing on his phone.

I saw him showing the phone

and I had friends
who came up to me to see...

No, no. You can't tell
me what your friends told you.

Understand.

You can sit down.

Now, Miss Strowger,

Your answer and of course,
your counterclaim,

involved the fact that Mr. Self

was showing intimate pictures of you

that he had maintained on his phone.

-So far, we don't have a witness to that.
-Mm.

So what I want you to tell me is
whether or not you personally

had a conversation with
Mr. Self about those videos

on that night on August 2nd.

I asked him not to show
video of me around the bar that night.

[Judy]
You did have a conversation with him?

Yeah, because he approached me.

Put your hand down.

I want you to tell me
about the conversation.

He approached me. Basically...

Not bas...
I don't want to hear "basically."

-[Joangela] He approached me...
-Approximately what time?

Saying hi.
Um, about 9:30 that night.

Approached me saying hi.

I told him I didn't want
anything to do with him,

that I had seen him showing videos

and that I was told that
it was sexual videos of myself.

[Judy]
And what did he say?

He said he can do what he
wants with his phone and walked away.

Do you recall that conversation, Mr. Self?

There was no conversation that took place.

-Uh, the only video...
-[Judy] No, no, no.

Slowly. There was no conversation.

-[David] There was no conversation
-Conversation that took place.

[David]
that took place about anything like that.

What video I did have was her being irate

over there in Huntington Beach.

So if you'd like to
see that, too, as well.

Well, I'd like to see
the videos that she says

that you have of her on your phone.

I don't have any videos
of her like that on my phone.

[Judy]
Did you delete them?

-I don't have it.
-[Judy stammers] Just...

Oh, he has a new phone. Got it.

He has... just on them.
He has a new phone.

Well, I did have, um, a letter
stating that he did get the backup

and he's got all the videos again.

Oh, I'd like to see that.

I do have a backup. Once I...

-[Judy] Just a second.
-Okay.

He sent this to my boss
at 1:30 in the morning.



-Shh!
-[Joangela] Sorry.

[Judy]
Mr. Self, this was sent by you

-to her boss on the 9th of August.
-Okay.

Would you tell me the purpose
of sending this letter to her boss?

She does very good at showing that she's,

uh, a good person
and all that other good stuff.

[Judy]
No, no, I don't think... listen to me.

-[David sighs]
-[Judy] I don't necessarily

-think anything.
-Okay.

I think any woman that allows
photographs to be taken of her,

intimate photographs that she would
not want put on...

-I wouldn't...
-[Judy] I'm speaking.

-Okay.
-[Judy] I'm speaking.

That she would not want posted on
the front page of a local newspaper.

-[David] Correct.
-[Judy] I think that that's foolish.

-[David] Yeah.
-[Judy] I do.

And I know a lot of people do it.

I do a shout out
every once in a while

and say that that's stupid to do.

And I think certainly if
you were showing those videos

or those photographs to anyone at the bar

because you were annoyed with her
or whatever,

you thought it was fun.

-I think that that's sad.
-Totally.

[Judy] Maybe worse.

What I want to know is,
after this all happened,

why you sent this email to her boss?

Because the thing is this,
that she is trying to pin me

as a bad guy or something like that,

is what she's really trying to do.

She's trying to
manipulate it to be on her side.

She lies and manipulates all the time,

and I've seen that because
I was with her. I should know.

-[Judy] Okay.
-The thing is this.

I have the video of her over
there in Huntington Beach being irate,

unable to have a conversation...

[Judy]
I don't care if she's irate, sir.

-Right now, she has no proof
-[David] Correct.

that you were showing videos of her
at the bar that evening.

-Yes.
-You don't have that

-because that's your counterclaim.
-Mm-hmm.

[Judy]
And if you don't have that,

then I have to dismiss your counterclaim.

But there's also harassment
and stalking that he's been doing.

Okay. I have to dismiss
that part of your counterclaim,

which is for revenge porn.

Okay. Now you're going
to tell me about the stalking,

and first I'll take a look
at a police report.

-Um, the police report, unfortunately...
-[Judy] Just a second.

You don't have it?

-I have a restraining order and...
-[Judy] Just a second.

Do you have a restraining
order that's in effect now?

-Yes.
-[Judy] I'd like to take a look at it.

[David]
Also, Your Honor, too, I have also...

[Judy] No, don't. I'm not...

-[David] Okay.
-I didn't ask you anything.

Were you at a hearing,
Mr. Self, on this protective order?

I never even got served papers
at all for anything.

I have proof of service.

Was there a signature on it?

Well, Mr. Self,
she has a restraining order that's...

and the hearing date
was August 25th, 2022.

She appeared... you're
supposed to stay away from her.

I'm just telling you.

And I'm telling you, considering the fact,
and I don't know

whether you were released
from prison recently,

are you still on parole?

-I'm on parole. Yes.
-[Judy] Okay.

-[Joangela] And he...
-Well, if you're...

I didn't ask you anything.

Well, if you're on parole,
Mr. Self, and you say

you weren't served with this restraining
order,

-I was never served.
-[Judy] I would strong...

I would strongly advise her

that you retain counsel
and question service.

Yeah, I've contacted my probation officer.

They're well aware of the...
the situation...

Don't tell me what they're aware of.

I'm telling you that there is
a protective order in place.

Gotcha.

And if you want to vacate
that protective order

because you question service
of that protective order,

you better do so.

-Okay.
-[Judy] In the meantime,

I suggest you stay very...

very far away from her.

He called me yesterday.

-I called you yesterday?
-[Joangela] Yes.

[Judy]
Don't speak to her.

Tell me what the
conversation was yesterday.

Um, I was on my way to work,

and I didn't know the phone number,

so I answered it, and he said,

"Please, just give me a minute,"
and I hung up.

[Judy] Did you call her
yesterday from that phone?

-There is a phone that...
-[Judy stammers] Just...just a second.

-That would be a yes.
-Yes.

Okay. And you know
this situation is hostile.

[David] Yes.

And you knew you were coming here today?

[David] That's correct.

Would you tell me, please,
why you called her yesterday?

I didn't mean to call her by any means.

Must've pocket dialed her.

Well, if it butt-called
her or pocket dialed her, sir,

that means that
you would were able to transfer

all the information that you
had on your old phone into your new phone.

Because after the
experience that you had at the bar,

there would be no reason for
you to have her number in your phone.

-[David] I know.
-[Judy] Unless you just transferred...

I got it right here.

Well, if you got it... listen to me.

If you got it right here,
then it wasn't a butt-call.

So you can either butt-call when...

-Am I wrong about that?
-[chuckles]

[Judy]
I'm not technically sophisticated,

but I do know this.

I can't think into my phone.

Now, maybe there is a phone
that you can think into.

I'd say,
"Well, I have her number right here."

I can't say... [stammers]

Am I missing something here?

You might only butt-dial me
because I'm in your favorites, but...

[all laugh]

♪♪

Why would you send this to her boss?

It shows that she lies and manipulates

and all sort of stuff to get her way.

I'm at a point where I don't
actually believe that you didn't

show some photographs of her
around that bar.

I did not.

♪♪

♪♪

[narrator]
David Self is accusing his ex-girlfriend,

Joangela Strowger,
of throwing away his phone.

Joangela is countersuing,

claiming David shared
private photos of her.

Okay, so you called her.

You want to tell me
why you called her yesterday?

I accidentally called her.

What's her number doing in your phone?

Because I... I keep all the
numbers and everything just in case

I have to get a hold of somebody.

Because... you know how many times
I've been with her and back and forth,

-back and forth, back and forth.
-Yeah.

[David] Tons of times.
You know what I mean?

-You know some-something, Mr. Self?
-[David] What's that?

-I don't believe you, sir.
-Okay.

I don't believe in...
I don't believe that there was ever

any reason for you to contact her boss.

-I think she has an order of protection.
-[David] Okay.

I'd like to see proof of service.

-Do you have it?
-Yes.

Oh, it's not connected with that,
I'm sorry.

If not, I have a picture
of the service in front of his house.

Yeah, service name.
So it was personal service.

And I do have a video after
the fact of what she's talking about,

the individual coming to the house.
So I recorded that...

[Judy] I'm just reading
the proof of service, sir.

You said you weren't served.

-[David] I wasn't served.
-I'd like to see proof of service.

If you had proof of service,
you were served.

-I wasn't served.
-[Judy] Okay.

Just because you took a picture
in front of the house and everything

doesn't necessarily mean anything.

[Judy] Yeah, it does.

Why is that?
I wasn't even at the resident at the time.

-They took a picture of me.
-[Judy] Shh!

Yeah. I would suggest to you, Mr. Self,

-[David] Stay away.
-If... I would suggest to you

-that, hire a lawyer...
-Okay.

if you think that
the service was improper.

I'm satisfied with it.

And another judge was satisfied with it,
and I still don't understand

why you wrote to her boss.

-[Joangela] I have...
-Why you wrote to her boss afterwards.

Any other communications?

[Joangela]
To my boss? Yes.

May I see it, please?

Well, this is also written
on August 9th, sir.

This is from you,
and it's a very graphic email to her boss.

-You want to take a look at it?
-I do indeed.

Mm-hmm. I'm going to show it to you.

[David] Okay.

Thank you.

So this is really just stating
the individual that they hired, that the...

No, I'm just asking you
whether you sent that to her boss.

[David] That is my email address.

And that looks like my writing,
that's correct.

Just a sec... The question is,
did you send that to her boss?

-Indeed.
[Judy] Okay. May I have it, please?

And that was after the events,
a week after the events

of the 2nd August, right?

Okay. Yes.

You want to tell me why
you sent that to her boss?

-Well...
-[Judy] I mean,

it's not telling that she's...
that she's a thief,

you have to be careful of her.

It's talking about sexual things.

Where's it saying sexual things in that?

[Judy] Oh, very easy.

You say she lies to her boss about cramps
while we lay in bed...

She is literally taking off of work
saying that she's you know, sick, or...

I'm asking you why.

Why would you send this to her boss?

It shows that she lies and manipulates

and all sort of stuff to get her way.

-[Judy] Okay.
-The fact of the nature,

I understand that,
I've been to prison and all sort of stuff.

I can be the bad guy
and all that great stuff.

I understand that.

-I'm not saying she's a good person.
-[David] Correct.

-I'm not saying you're a bad person.
-[David] Correct.

-She's got to pay for her phone.
-[David] Yes.

[Judy] You got to pay for this.

Because I'm at a point
where I don't actually believe

that you didn't show some

-photographs of her around that bar.
-[David] I did not.

I don't believe that you didn't show

some photographs of her around that bar.

-I'd never do such thing.
-[Judy] Just a second.

Well, the same person who would
never do such a thing

-wrote to her boss that you were present
-[David] Yes.

when she called her boss and said,

"I can't come to her
because I have cramps,"

and she was laying in bed with you.

-Correct.
-[Judy] Okay.

And that same person wouldn't
show a picture.

-[David] No. Totally different.
-A picture...

Okay, good.

On your counterclaim,
I am awarding you $5,000.

On your counterclaim from that,
I'm taking off $500

that... because you had no right
to trash his phone.

There are alternatives.
One of them is not trashing his phone.

Therefore, ordering on the counterclaim

a judgment for the
defendant in the amount of $4,500.

Plaintiff's case is dismissed.
We're done. Thank you very much.

Thank you, Your Honor.

[bailiff]
This court is adjourned.

♪♪

She gets away with it again.

The judge is very fair.

Unfortunately, he tried to make me
look like the bad guy,

but the judge
could see right through him.

Did I show her videos? Yes.

Why was she being irate over there
at Huntington Beach?

That he's showing, um,
sexual videos of me and him.

The nudes and all that stuff, no.

Why would
I do something like that?

I went black.

And that's the only reason why

I threw the phone in the trash
in the first place.

Because I felt helpless.

She sold me on this
great person and everything,

but come to find out,
you know, it's not what it is.

I gotta just be more careful
with a phone around.

I guess. Sarah,
it's because of my generation,

but I've been saying for a very long time,

even before the internet,
because, you know,

I was, in fact, young
at some point in my life.

And they did have all kinds of cameras

-and Polaroid cameras back in the day.
-Mm-hmm.

But never take a photograph of
yourself or allow a photograph to be taken

that you wouldn't like to see on
the front page of The New York Times.

And now with social media,

I think that that's
more true than ever.

To me, why would you
post anything or take a picture,

allow a picture to be taken
that might later embarrass you?

I agree to an extent,
but I disagree with you that in this case,

because the defendant
mentioned that the plaintiff

had taken some of this video
and photo without her permission.

And I think that now it can
get a little bit blurry as to,

"Well, I didn't approve my photo taken."

Obviously, a sexually-explicit photo

getting sent to your boss

is not the intended purpose of that photo.

-I think whoever sends that photo,
-Right.

misdirecting the intention of the photo,

is the one that
should be held accountable,

not the person that was sending it
for a purpose of

a long-distance relationship.

There's many reasons why
now people might send photos

that they wouldn't want plastered

on the front page of The New York Times,

but as the recipient
of a photo like that...

[Judy] You're not supposed
to republish it.

[Sarah] You have a responsibility,

if you care enough about that person,

to keep its intended purpose...
its intended purpose private.

-[Judy] I absolutely agree with you.
-Mm-hmm.

But it is bad judgment.

So I don't mind repeating at least,
my perspective,

which is, if you don't want to
see it out there, don't take it.

♪♪

[narrator]
Have you been cheated?



♪♪

[closing theme plays]