- [Brett] What's this, Monster fans?
Looks like a bunch of girls have invaded the garage!
- [Erin] Right, on girls.
- Just walk away and your lives will be spared!
- [Brett] And Jesse's on the injured list.
- [Jesse] All you need is a mop and a dustpan.
- [Cindy] I'm gonna give you a mop.
- [Brett] Will they be able to pound out a monster?
- I'm just wondering how I'm gonna blow this one up.
- Or just scratch each other's eyes out?
- Well, you'd better get out of my face, then.
- Why don't you get me the [bleep] outta your face, then?
- [Brett] It's a Monster Garage gender fender bender!
[Erin purrs]
- [Narrator] Join us now
as Jesse and his g*ng of maverick mechanics
rip, grind and burn,
transforming ordinary street vehicles
into monster machines in "The Monster Garage".
[aggressive rock music]
♪ Monster, Monster Garage
♪ Monster, Monster Garage
♪ Monster, Monster Garage
♪ Monster, Monster Garage
♪ Monster, Monster Garage
♪ Monster Garage
- [Narrator] This week's challenge:
take a 1965 Cadillac Coupe Deville
and turn it into a steel-crushing, bone rattling
demolition derby car.
The rules:
when built, the monster machine must appear to be stock.
The team can spend no more than $3,000 for parts.
Jesse and his crew have seven days and nights.
On the first day, the design.
For the next five, they build.
And on the seventh day, they race.
If successful, each team member takes home
a $3,400 set of Mac tools.
And the clock starts now!
[aggressive rock music]
by the mothers from hell.
That's right, say hello to the first ever all-girl team.
Jesse's out, recovering from a shoulder operation.
The chicks are taking over the garage.
They head upstairs to hatch their plan.
- Okay, this is what we're gonna do.
We're gonna take this Cadillac
and turn it into a demo derby car.
- [Narrator] The first thing they do
is take anything pink and paint it black.
- I can never understand that,
the whole pink car thing.
It's like the girly-girly thing.
Like, I'm gonna have a pink Cadillac and go cruise around.
- We're definitely not Barbies.
- We should maybe do a Black Widow kind of thing out of it?
- So a Black Widow mates, mates and kills, you know?
[all laugh]
- [Crystal] Or get matching black widow tattoos for it.
- Yeah. - Be real fun.
- Oh, yeah. [tattoo g*n buzzing]
- You're a demolition derby racer,
what do we need to be successful in competing this car?
- We got a lot of things we need to do.
We need to move the shift linkage
so it doesn't break on us.
Kinda get the radiators protected as we can
so it doesn't get hit.
- Basic what I think most of this is gonna be
is working on hopping of the engine.
- How much work is the engine part of this gonna take?
I mean, like I don't know much about engines.
- We don't need, yeah, we don't need to build a race car.
It's gonna be fast enough.
- [Narrator] Cindy Regimbald has made road rage
a full time hobby.
- [Announcer] We have a huge fire out here,
ladies and gentlemen!
It's car 423, which is driven by Cindy Regimbald.
- I started chasing tools when I was old enough to walk.
My dad used to run demolition derbies.
I'd strip his cars while he was gone to work
during the summer when I didn't have school,
and just couldn't wait until I was old enough
to actually run.
- So I mean, are we gonna do it then like black
with like a red hourglass on the roof?
And then like some poles coming out the side,
have like some spikes coming out or something?
Something like hinged that they just come out of?
- What about the back?
- We're gonna do a roll
with the part going across the square and then over the top.
And then we're gonna have spiked fins
sticking out of the back.
- Just want it to do some damage.
- Yeah!
- Think that we can work together and pull this off,
and we can prove to the guys that we can really make it.
- Yeah. - Make it tough.
Make it Viking, make it wicked, make it destroy.
- k*ll. [laughs]
She's a badass wrecking machine!
- Hell yeah. - Wanna destroy stuff
just as much as the boys do.
- [Narrator] The plan for their coupe destruct?
Lose all the glass, reinforce the back,
protect the driver with a horizontal roll cage,
relocate the fuel tank and the battery
and buttress the front.
[aggressive rock music]
- Let's do it! - Yeah.
- [Maria] Let's do it!
[laid back music]
- [Narrator] Day two.
The Monster Garage is about to get
a full dose of girl power.
Dragster queen Crystal Stern joins the team
from Clearlake, California.
Derby queen Cindy Regimbald jetted in from Rutland, Vermont.
LA's Juanita Myers is here
to help wrench their monster wench.
Metal sculptress Erin Enderle
hails from Westminster, Colorado.
She runs with wolves and welders.
LA's Lieutenant Mustardseed.
And the mother of all welders from Wilmington, California,
Maria Alvarado.
[aggressive music]
- Pull and tear and rip.
It doesn't matter how it comes off,
just as long as it comes off.
[aggressive rock music]
[metal clatters]
Once, out.
[aggressive rock music]
- [Narrator] The girls
quickly get into the spirit of destruction.
- We're gonna gently remove the windshield
from the casing.
[aggressive rock music]
[Erin grunts]
[glass shatters]
- Cool!
[aggressive rock music]
[Erin grunts]
[metal clangs]
- There it goes!
[glass shatters]
- There you go. - Yeah!
- Ladies?
[glass shatters]
That ruled!
Okay, like any good mom,
I'd better pick up the broken glass.
[glass tinkles]
- [Narrator] The Monster Garage vacuum cleaner
finally comes out of the closet.
Others decide it's time to get down and dirty
with the engine.
This monster won't need an air conditioning unit
to be cool.
- [LT] Don't need air conditioning, right?
- [Narrator] But they will need the radiator
to keep their motor from feeling the heat.
So Erin cuts it out.
- Did I get it?
Good, all right.
- [Narrator] They set it aside.
- That was hard.
- [Narrator] Yesterday's commute from Vermont to California
has pretty much demolished the team's derby driver.
- I flew in from 3,000 miles away and I'm really tired.
My head hurts and just overwhelmed right now.
I just need to go and relax
and get some sleep
so tomorrow I can start all refreshed, and,
have a good day.
I'm gonna go get some rest. - Yeah.
- So tomorrow I'm refreshed for a new day.
- Hope you feel better. - Chill.
- Yeah. - See you tomorrow.
- Yeah, okay. - Get some rest.
- [Cindy] I work better when I feel better.
- Be refreshed. - Yeah.
- [Narrator] While Cindy bugs out early,
the rest of the g*ng keeps banging.
- We need another body.
Can we use you?
- Sure. - I can help to!
- Okay. - I'm done up here.
- Okay, then.
- [Narrator] They want to end on a big note:
drop the Caddy's gas tank.
- It's full of gas,
and if we tilt it over, all the gas is gonna come out.
- [Erin] Ready for this?
- [Narrator] This is no tank,
it's a 40 gallon gas tub,
and there's enough fuel sloshing in it
to give the garage a new zip code.
[poles clank]
- [Erin] Is it even going up any more?
We might need some lift too.
- Yeah, you know, they're up as far as they go.
- I say, let's take the gas out,
cut the tip and be done with it.
- It'll come out. Stock gas tanks will come out.
Okay, let's pull your side towards us a little bit.
- Possibly not. - Keep going.
- [Erin] Still intact! [laughs]
- Siphon time? - Crystal,
let us siphon this out.
- All right.
- We're gonna siphon it out.
[Maria gags]
- [Narrator] Siphoning the gas lightens the tank
and a valuable day one lesson is learned:
work smart, not hard.
[moody music]
The behemoth gas tank is out,
but these ballsy builders aren't through yet.
- What we're gonna do is get all this exhaust pipe out.
[aggressive rock music]
[cutter whines]
- [Narrator] It's been a solid first build day
for the Black Widow-makers,
but just as they're about to wrap it up,
a piece of their web begins to unravel.
- [Maria] I lost my diamond.
Oh, man!
- [Erin] In all this broken glass.
- I lost my diamond.
- [Narrator] It seems the Monster Garage
is extracting a price for their earlier play.
- There's a lot of broken glass.
We picked up a lot of it, threw everything away, you know,
in the trash bins and it's just,
too much shiny stuff and,
I don't think I'll find it.
- [Narrator] But it will take more
than shattered safety glass to break Maria Alvarado.
- [Maria] I'm a very determined person and so far,
everything that I put forth,
I've accomplished.
- [Narrator] Maria's always met her life head-on.
She dropped out of high school when she was 15
to have the first of her eight children.
- [Maria] This is my son, Johnny Angel.
This is Amanda, Lorraine, Brandy, Lea,
Junior, Little Maria and Stephanie.
- [Narrator] And now, she's also a super grandmother.
- [Maria] And this is my grandson, Miguelita.
- [Narrator] She was a good housewife, but she wanted more.
- I'm a really physical person.
And I looked into a welding class.
- [Narrator] So super mom became super welder.
She teaches beginners during the day,
and works a 12 hour night shift at a local refinery.
- Well, this is something I'm gonna remember.
[moody music]
- [Narrator] Aside from losing the diamond in Maria's ring,
the all-girl team had a better day in the Monster Garage.
- Had a great day today. - I did too.
- [Maria] I enjoyed working with you guys today, you know?
- We knocked out more today
than I really thought we were going to.
- Me too.
- [Maria] Tomorrow's gonna be better.
It'll be better, yeah.
[upbeat music]
- [Narrator] Monster Garage Factoid:
A Black Widow spider's thread
is so light and so strong,
that the United States military
is now making b*llet-proof vests from their webs.
[aggressive rock music] ♪ Monster
♪ Monster Garage
Day three.
Another chapter in the ongoing saga of Babes in Boyland.
- [Erin] Let's get started.
- [Narrator] Erin takes command of today's as*ault.
Everything on this big old tank needs to be b*mb-proof.
- This is so important.
Super strong welds.
Think of impacts that this thing is gonna be taking.
[cars thud]
- Right? - Good job Erin.
- Right on. - Right on, girls.
[aggressive rock music]
- [Narrator] Cindy and Crystal go tag team on the engine.
The beater loses its heater.
[hammers clang]
[drill whines]
[aggressive rock music]
- [Jesse] Throw it!
[drill whines]
[heater thuds]
- [Narrator] LT wastes no time slicing and dicing
some tubular reinforcement.
[saw buzzes]
Lieutenant Mustardseed got the first half of her name
the hard way, she earned it.
- Joined the Navy out of high school to pay for my college.
And ended up going into Naval Intelligence
because they offered me, you know, higher rank and money
and stuff like that.
So I went in for six years automatically.
So that was pretty cool.
- [Narrator] LT might be out of the military,
but she's still in uniform.
- The clothes I wear, when I paint my face,
you know, it's like w*r out there.
You gotta put your w*r paint on.
That's how I live my life, you know?
- [Narrator] Spider girls Erin and Juanita
spin a plan for webbed windows.
- [Erin] We can do this, and the longer...
- [Juanita] It's gonna kinda be a lot more interesting
if they're not perfectly spaced.
And there's a little bit wider here
than it is over here,
plus for visibility, it might be good.
- Oh, she don't need to see what's gonna hit her!
[torch crackles]
- [Narrator] There's no need for major upgrades
on the demo car's engine.
It just needs to run.
They want to check the timing chain.
- [Cindy] Just want to balance her out
so we can get in there and pull the timing chain off.
If our timing chain's wore at all,
it could jump time and then
the engine's not gonna wanna run
'cause it's outta time and,
we don't wanna go out there and have it die
for some stupid reason like that.
This harmonic balancer's a two-piece
but we're missing a bolt that goes in the front.
So we have no special tool to get the crank,
the harmonic balancer off,
so I just had someone get us a longer bolt to screw in there
so we can have something to press against to pull the
piece off.
- [Narrator] A longer bolt
might be able to convince the harmonic balancer to come out.
Crystal gives it a shot.
- [Crystal] It's not, and that's not gonna work.
- [Narrator] At the back of the car,
steel tubing goes in for reinforcement.
- That's the base,
and then these guys will go here.
This bar that's gonna go from here to here's
gonna ride on top of that at an angle,
and then extend about three inches out
so that it'll reinforce the bumper.
[torch crackles]
- [Narrator] Crystal breaks from engine frustration
to haul in new supplies.
[Crystal laughs]
Love it.
Perfect accessory, every girl needs one.
[aggressive rock music]
- [Narrator] Freebie.
Zip, zero, nada.
Erin and Juanita's web window comes to life.
[aggressive rock music]
- Crystal?
What do you think?
- Oh, I love it!
That's great!
That is so beautiful.
Man, you rock!
That is so great.
- This is so fun.
[aggressive music]
[torch crackles]
- Good job, baby!
- I think that turned out really good.
Please! Please choose me!
Sculpting with metal is my absolute favorite.
I started out just making things for myself.
I never realized I was gonna be that good.
And so it's just an amazing feeling
to know that people want what I have.
- Wow!
Black Widow! [laughs]
- [Narrator] The spin doctors are back at it,
and in no time at all,
their crashmobile gets another iron curtain.
[grinder whines]
[aggressive rock music]
- Just like that.
- Fine. - It's excellent!
- Beautiful! [Erin laughs]
- I work at a set, prop and design shop.
There's carpenters and scenics, craftspeople, lead people
and of course I'm in the metal shop.
I'm a little pyro.
I love fire.
Ready?
There you go.
When that iron comes out of the forge,
it's awesome. [laughs]
- [Narrator] The all-girl team
brings good balance to the garage.
They've tapped into their sensitive, artistic side
while getting in touch with their inner grease monkey.
- LT and Juanita and myself are more creative and artistic,
whereas Cindy and Maria are very 90 degree angles
kind of people.
So we put them on the perfect projects,
the projects that have to be perfect, and,
and they're doing a great job with it.
- I mean, I'm not gonna spin spider webs in windows.
That's not my cup of tea.
We're all different, you know,
that's what makes a team.
- [Narrator] Crystal's having no luck
removing the harmonic balancer,
so she finds something she can do:
attach blame.
- [Crystal] So Miss Mechanic, your idea isn't working.
- [Cindy] Well, I'll do it for ya.
- Okay, that'd be great, thanks.
[cat miaows]
- [Cindy] Come on now.
- [Narrator] A flinty Vermont derby driver
and a California dragster chick
dripping with ink and attitude.
One's water, the other's oil.
- Yeah, I hope she makes it work, you know?
And she can give me attitude over it. Whatever.
- She obviously didn't understand
what I was trying to tell her.
I mean, she's that mechanically inclined,
she shoulda understood it, but...
- I'm happy, she actually got it out!
Makes my life better.
- That's it. - Okay.
Lift it up and over.
This is gonna support the sides with the bars,
so if we get hit on the side,
it won't cave in.
[saw hisses]
I'm holding it down! [laughs]
[metal clangs]
- Yeah, yeah!
- The bumper's gonna fit on here.
- [Maria] Yeah.
- This will be cut off to about here.
The bumper's gonna fit over the top of it,
so that if a car comes in,
hits the bumper,
it's just gonna hit the frame.
- Yeah. - That's all.
Bounce back off.
- [Narrator] LT and Maria
finish off the rear trunk reinforcement.
[torch crackles]
They can't resist giving it that feminine touch.
- Evil b*tch! [laughs]
We got some evil b*tches here!
She's an evil b*tch! [laughs]
- I'm an evil b*tch too, so... [laughs]
[mellow music]
- [Narrator] The spiders from Long Beach
had another good day.
Progress was made on all fronts,
but they still feel something's missing.
- I was hoping Jesse would come in today, you know?
He's just a celebrity.
It's gonna be kind of fun to...
He's cute. [laughs]
He's eye candy.
He doesn't have to do anything,
he can just stand in the corner and we all just look at him.
- [Narrator] You may get your wish tomorrow, Erin.
[mellow music]
[door clangs]
Monster Garage Factoid.
A female Black Widow Spider
may occasionally k*ll the male after mating.
Currently, there are 3,417 women in prison
for k*lling their husbands.
[aggressive rock music] ♪ Monster
♪ Monster Garage
Day four.
The Black Widow go girls return to the garage
and find a big and juicy male in their web.
[chimes tinkle]
- I'm Jesse. - Hello.
- [Jesse] How you doing?
- Oh, you can't use that hand.
- [Jesse] I'm a lefty today.
- Okay.
- I'm Jesse.
- Cindy.
- Hi. - Pleased to meet ya.
- [Narrator] He's still sore from his recent bodywork.
- They grafted a cadaver ligament and, uh,
incised, cut the end of that scapula off.
- [Narrator] He's here, but where's his hair?
- I can't comb my hair for two months.
I can't. [laughs]
And I can't comb it lefty, so,
I don't know, back to normal.
- [Narrator] And back to business.
- So you're totally dialed in with the roll cage?
- We're just doing it
like we would in an actual derby car.
Crossed here, up here and across the dash.
- You guys got seats and stuff, for the stock one, yeah?
- Yeah.
- Cool.
[aggressive rock music] [torch crackles]
- [Narrator] Erin starts working on a beefy crash bumper.
[torch crackles]
Cindy and Maria continue the steel reinforcement cage.
[aggressive rock music] [torch crackles]
LT and Crystal go west, as in choppers.
They need to machine some spears
to give the spider some sting.
- So let's do it.
[laid back music]
- [Narrator] It's going to take at least three hours
to get their points made.
Instead of heading back to the garage
to help their sisters in spiderhood -
- [Maria] Just slim tack this side in first.
- Okay, I'll steady this side.
[upbeat music]
- [Narrator] These bad girls hit the beach.
- My hands are black from, like, the last three days.
- Dude, look at my arms!
It will not come off.
[torch crackles]
[saw buzzes]
[upbeat music]
- Much more relaxed now.
- [Narrator] Three hours of fun in the sun later,
it's back to West Coast Choppers
to pick up their new weapons.
- Looking good! Man!
- [Narrator] They might need them
when they get back to the garage.
They sneak back in like guilty children.
But mother Maria is waiting for them
and she's not happy.
- If you seen that [bleep] was getting done
over there by somebody else,
you guys shoulda just came back
and started helping us with everything else!
- No, 'cause we've been working through lunch break,
we haven't had lunch, we haven't had [bleep]
because, you know,
we've been out doing this and trying to get it done right.
- Well then, go take a lunch break!
Maybe that'll help you ease up a little bit.
Maybe?
- That would be nice, yeah.
- I mean, I've noticed she had an attitude with me
from the beginning.
- [Crystal] I haven't had an attitude with you at all.
- You know, so I mean, if you wanna get down like that.
- No. - I mean, go,
you know, just, I don't even wanna deal with it, you know?
Plain and simple.
- Me either. - Okay then.
[tense music]
- I didn't like that.
- I didn't like that at all either.
- I know that they're working hard
but we would be too.
- I can understand why Maria got mad, you know?
They were gone, you know, three quarters of a day
down the machine shop
and they weren't even machining the pieces themselves.
Somebody else was doing it
and they have to go back to pick up two pieces.
They didn't even come back with everything.
- [Narrator] No one knows about their beach excursion.
The lies are piling up.
Erin tries to conduct a meeting,
but it just gets uglier.
- If you'd have gone down to the store,
maybe you could have done something different,
but we were talking to the guy and he, you know,
with the equipment that he has available to use
at that particular moment,
he could do the spears, not the gear.
That's the way it worked out.
And I don't need to hear it from you.
- [Maria] Hear what?
- I don't need to hear your criticism about something-
- [Maria] So you're gonna, um, she's gonna-
- You know what, obviously you're not ready
to just put everything aside and just-
- No, you're obviously not ready
to just put everything aside,
because you're the one that keeps coming at it.
- Okay, I'm asking you a question.
- No, you're not, you're sitting there criticizing!
- Even do it, okay?
I asked you if you were gonna put everything to the side,
you said, fine.
- No. - Now you wanna
get flared up again, we can do it, okay?
That's your choice.
- No, it's your choice,
'cause you're the one that's getting upset.
- You're the one who's getting upset!
- You're the one who's getting upset.
- You don't see me all flared up.
- I'm not upset!
This is so stupid!
- So, yes, exactly! So why flare up?
- Because you're the one criticizing
saying that the gear
should have been done. - Nobody's criticizing!
- First, when you had no idea
what went on at the machine shop,
that you should keep your mouth shut about that.
And not be giving comments about something
that doesn't involve you.
- I'm just gonna leave that [bleep] alone, okay?
Because I don't wanna. - Get your hand outta my face!
- I don't wanna take it
anywhere else. - Get out of my face.
- All right?
- Well, you'd better get out of my face, then.
- Why don't you get me the [bleep] out of your face, then?
- You guys, this is totally unnecessary.
Totally unnecessary.
- [Maria] That's exactly what I said.
- No, but Maria, come on.
- You know what? - Wait a minute,
wait a minute. - Nah, you know,
- Can I just say, no,
can I just say one thing? - Just drop it then.
No.
Just drop it. - This is unnecessary.
- Well, exactly!
I asked her a question!
She wants to get all [bleep] pissy about it?
You know she can't even answer right!
- [LT] Yeah, but you're coming in with this, you know?
- "With this"?
- [LT] You came at us with this, you know?
Okay, let's go eat, [bleep] it.
[tense music]
Just go to the office or something.
[tense music]
- I don't even smoke, okay?
I quit a year and a half ago.
And she's got me to the point
where I have to go and have a cigarette now
to calm my [bleep] down.
From day one, she's had an attitude.
We're trying to work as a team,
and when you got one that disagrees on everything,
there's a problem.
[tense music]
- [Narrator] It's day five in the Monster Garage.
The femme fatales have only two days left
to turn their Caddy into a crusher.
[car slams]
After yesterday's cat fight,
it's a good thing that the alpha dog's back in the garage.
- I feel like working today, so,
lucky for them.
- [Narrator] Jesse takes stock of what needs to be done.
- All the edges of the bumpers need to be cut off.
Nothing can come into the tires when you hit something.
You know, the roll cage has got to be finished,
doors have got to be welded shut.
Everything has gotta be barb free, basically,
so you don't get hung up on anything,
'cause if you hit something, you lock into someone,
then it's over.
What are they making on the back?
I'm afraid to ask them.
- They're making fins.
Big Batman-style fins.
Gonna make it look mean
and something else to ram into people with,
with the big steel poles sticking out of there.
Someone runs into that, they'll really hurt their radiator.
- Or it's gonna be something else for people to ram.
- Basically. - Okay.
- [Narrator] Jesse calls a team meeting
to refocus the group and reset priorities.
- Let's go full force on making it function.
It's a demolition derby car, right?
That's gotta be a hundred per cent of our focus.
Let's make it work as a demolition derby car.
When we get it all done, and we have extra time,
then we can screw around with it.
You know, I think we can literally finish this thing
by midday tomorrow.
- [Narrator] The first item on the list
will be strengthening the front bumper.
- And blow holes in that radiator support.
You can cut this out
and go straight down to the top of that frame rail
have one go in here and one go in here.
Don't make 'em, top and bottom the same,
'cause it'll just bend the frame rail up.
I'll open up the holes for you guys
and cut that stuff out right now.
[torch crackles]
[moody music]
- [Narrator] Jesse teams up with Cindy
to craft a set of crash-proof exhaust pipes.
- [Jesse] Look at this big beautiful space
right here, though, going straight out the sides.
- [Cindy] Yeah, but then they-
- I thought there was a cool space
behind the wheel wells, but, uh,
Cindy says that if someone smashes into that
it'll plug the exhaust off and,
it's the banana in the tailpipe trick.
- We're just bending the exhaust pipe
to come out of the manifold
to come straight up through the hood.
- Gimme that band, I'll saw it off for ya.
- [Cindy] Huh?
[metal clangs]
- Try that.
Is that close?
Should go in about two inches or so.
- It's in like two inches.
- That was a pretty good guess.
[laid back music]
[torch crackles]
- Okay, I'll set it up in there and see how it looks.
- I like her.
She's a worker.
- Right now, we've got this all welded to the frame and side
and nothing to the bumper so far.
- [Narrator] Erin and Juanita
make a plan for reinforcing the police bumper.
Then they start welding it solid.
[torch crackles]
[moody music]
- Kari Barba and her all-girl tattoo crew
join the build team to do some modifications
on the Black Widow builders.
- Somebody gave me a call, actually, to the studio
and said they had a group of women working on a car
and they all wanted to get the, um, Black Widow spider
to kind of commemorate the building of the car.
- We can all get matching Black Widow tattoos for it, huh?
- So, hot rod spider?
Pretty bad, huh?
- It's interesting to watch 'em work.
Looks like they're having a blast.
[tattoo g*n buzzes]
[moody music]
- [Narrator] Welcome to the Monster Garage Salon
and Tattoo Parlor.
[tattoo g*n buzzes]
- I haven't even showed her this one yet!
[moody music]
[tattoo g*n buzzes]
- I'm pretty sure my mother's gonna freak out.
She's watching this with her friends
from the Justice Center over in Boulder.
- Well, you know what my mom told me
is that she found that she liked tattoos
on her friends' children,
and her friends like my tattoos,
so it's just hard to see it on your own daughter.
- All done. - Oh, that is beautiful.
Wow, what detail!
- [Erin] Pretty cool, huh?
[moody music]
- Cool.
Like my tattoo?
It's painless, it was quick. [laughs]
- [Narrator] With tender tattoos fresh on their flesh,
their girls get back to building their monster.
- That's good.
[Erin roars]
[torch crackles]
- Erin?
Might have a task, wonder if you can do it.
[torch crackles]
Thank you.
- [Narrator] Jesse and the spider babes
hit the afterburners and bring day five home.
From front to back,
old big daddy Caddy's starting to look pretty bad,
and that's good for a monster.
[torch crackles]
- We wanna inflict damage and get the hell away,
not inflict and stay.
- [Narrator] There's a Black Widow monster
waiting to be born,
and its due date is tomorrow.
- [Brett] Coming up!
Will the Black Widow have some sting?
Or will the all-girl team be a big bust?
- We should all get together and hold hands and pray.
[aggressive rock music] ♪ Monster
♪ Monster Garage
- [Narrator] Day six.
The ladies show up and get right to work.
That's a good thing, since they have a lot to do.
The demolition deadline is rapidly approaching,
and the crew scrambles to battle ready their beast.
The car looks good, but she still don't run.
- Crystal was saying that she could have that cranked out
and she seems super confident about that,
but nothing's getting done on it.
And I can guarantee that if it doesn't start,
the real dark side of me is gonna come out.
You might wanna have those cameras ready,
'cause I will k*ll somebody if this motor doesn't start.
- [Narrator] Before Erin bursts,
Crystal cranks on the engine.
[moody music]
Maria welds the doors shut.
This b*mber ain't busting open.
- Woo, hot!
- [Narrator] LT widens the rear wheel wells
to keep the panels from puncturing the tires.
- [Cindy] Okay.
- [Narrator] Cindy and Maria waste no time
making a shifter for their monster.
[moody music] [torch crackles]
- Maria's made a shifter to put on the floor,
so if we run the stock one,
the linkage could break and we could lose our shifting.
Then it doesn't matter how smashed the car gets,
the shifter's all self-contained.
- [Narrator] Four battle ready rims roll into the garage,
outfitted with, appropriately enough,
Bridgestone Duallers.
Freebie, zip, zero, nada.
A few quick turns with the air wrench
and their baby is sporting a new pair of shoes.
Cindy jumps under the hood to prepare
for feeding their two ton toddler.
- Just building the throttle cable for it.
- Think you can handle that?
- [Cindy] I think I can.
- I know you're just a girl.
- I know I'm just a girl.
You're just a boy.
But that's backwards though, isn't it?
- No, this has gotta be tied down.
This connects to here, and then it-
- Yeah, but- - This little lever
right here on the carburetor?
- Yeah?
- [Jesse] That makes gas go in.
- No [bleep] really?
- Yeah, when you got-
- Let me make a bracket to hold that.
Get that inside the cut.
- I'm sorry.
That little thingy, not the lever.
I'm trying to be nice,
trying to change my ways.
'Cause a lot of people think that I need anger management.
- [Cindy] Really?
- But I say [bleep] them.
[ghostly laughing]
- [Narrator] Before the car is done,
the Caddy has its first head-on collision.
Crystal hammers her skull on the bumper.
- I can't even walk straight right now.
- Okay, so that seals the deal.
[moody music]
- [Narrator] Crystal nurses her noggin
in the Monster parking lot.
With our engine girl out of action,
Erin is concerned that the Caddy might not make it
to the starting line.
- Now I don't know if it's gonna get done.
We got nobody working on the motor right now.
Maybe a lack of teamwork,
or maybe some people just feeling
like they got all the time in the world,
especially if they've never seen the show.
You know, I'm a faithful viewer, and,
I try to tell 'em right off the bat.
When you think you have time, you don't.
- [Narrator] Crystal's done nursing her head wound.
She's not 100%, but she's back.
And she's ready to help however she can.
- I don't feel focused enough to do
what I really need to do,
but I can do some groundwork, and,
you know, help out, I think, a little bit.
I'm just not thinking straight right now.
- Good thing you don't have that much brains to damage.
- I know, right?
- So it's not a total loss.
[moody music]
- You're on fire! - Fire!
- They don't call me hot pants for nothing.
- Jesse's flaming.
- I think I know where this wants to go
but I can grind the floor
if you want to weld it in there, right?
- I'm gonna MIG weld it.
You just work on the top one, I got it.
- I got it.
- I got it.
- [Narrator] Jesse seems to have found a new playmate.
But this one doesn't have a staple in her belly button.
- I can do it.
[metal clangs]
- She's really pushy. She is. - No I'm not.
You're the one that's pushy.
- Go push them. - "You done yet?"
"You getting done yet?"
[torch hisses]
- I kinda like her!
She's like the female version of me.
- I'm not that bad.
I'm a good girl.
I might have to go to anger management next.
Here, pick it up here.
- No, I can do it!
- You can?
- [Jesse] All right.
- Oh, this time you got it.
[moody music]
- Okay, go.
- [Cindy] I can put that back now?
- Yes.
- Jesse says when we get the gas pedal in,
we're gonna start it.
- [Jesse] Go.
- [Narrator] Cindy attaches the throttle cable
to the thingy on the carburetor
and Jesse welds the gas pedal into place.
[torch crackles]
- [Jesse] I'm done.
Let's fire this mother up and get out of here.
- [Cindy] Crystal!
You got faith in your work?
- [Narrator] The team gathers around
to hear their monster roar to life.
[engine splutters]
- Woo! - Woo!
- Yeah, she's, uh. - You guys flinched.
[all laugh]
- Can I get a rag?
- [Cindy] Time it.
It's gotta be off.
- [Jesse] It sounded like it fired.
- [Cindy] It did.
- Yeah. - Just wasn't timed right.
- [Narrator] It sounds like a case of bad timing
for the all-girl build team.
And their build time is running out.
- Crystal should be doing this.
It's her project!
- [Crystal] Coming right up here, girl.
- [Lisa] Okay.
- 180.
[spanner clangs]
How is this just not going 180?
I had it dead time the first time.
It doesn't wanna go 180.
- [Narrator] Crystal tweaks,
and Cindy primes the carburetor.
It's time to give it another shot.
[engine splutters]
- [Crystal] Keep running, keep running.
- I'm telling you, it ain't right.
Something's off, way off.
[downbeat music]
- [Jesse] Firing order's right on?
- [Crystal] Should be.
- [Jesse] You double check it?
- This is number one, right?
- I'm tired.
- This is [silent] up.
- This, wait. Yeah, these are all wrong.
This one should be number seven.
This one should be number four.
[moody music]
[engine splutters]
Stop, stop, stop!
[moody music]
- [Jesse] It's not even trying to fire.
- [Crystal] Gonna dead time it.
[Jesse belches]
- That's what I think about that.
- Cute! - Okay, I'm getting out, then.
- Better work.
I want my toolbox.
- I hate failing.
- We're not failing.
I didn't come out here to fail.
- [Jesse] Well, did you watch her put the timing chain in?
I mean, did she-
- I had nothing to do with it.
- No, but did she seem like she knew what she was doing, or?
- I think she's a lot of thought.
- Help her and eyeball it,
see if she can figure out what the hell's wrong.
- Well, you gotta start at the bottom, though.
I love doing other people's work.
[moody music]
Where was your vacuum when you took it off?
- It was facing front.
- It was? Okay.
[moody music]
You have something else to do?
So, just pulled alt cover off and...
- Want some gum?
- I need some frigging gum.
You abandoning ship?
- No.
I'm just wondering how I'm gonna blow this one up.
- [Cindy] We're not blowing this one up.
- I already did the shredder on the hearse.
[wreck explodes]
I shot the RX-7 with a machine g*n.
[minigun whines]
What could top those two?
Hmm...
Maybe we should all get together
and hold hands and pray.
The throttle totally works, huh?
- [Cindy] Throttle rocks.
- [Jesse] Wonder why that is?
- [Cindy] It wasn't all you.
- [Jesse] 90 per cent.
- 90 per cent my [bleep]!
- You were just gonna fire it up with nothing
before I got here, remember?
"We don't even need that to fire it up!"
- We can fire it up without the throttle being hooked up!
- [Jesse] Stupid girls!
- What
did I just hear out of your mouth?
- I said, "good job, girls".
- [Cindy] Yeah. That's not what you said.
- [Jesse] Should be home, cooking and cleaning.
All you need is a mop and a dustpan!
- I'm gonna give you a mop!
You know honey, I'd rather spend all day
slaving over a hot engine
than over a hot stove.
- It's gotta run before it gets hot, though.
- [Cindy] Girls ready?
Try again.
[engine roars]
- [Narrator] The engine's running on most of its cylinders.
Time for the all-important test drive.
The sacrificial junker for the Black Widow.
And Jesse pulls out his own stinger.
[air hisses]
- [laughs] There.
- I wasn't worried about getting it done.
Crystal, you know,
needed to sort it out a little bit
before we just did everything for her.
[engine roars]
- [Narrator] Because of his bum wing,
Jesse's more than happy
to turn over all driving duties to Cindy.
She'll test it and run it in the challenge.
[engine roars]
[tires squeal]
[engine splutters]
- [Jesse] Demolition glider.
[engine roars]
[engine squeals]
- There we are! - Yeah! [laughs]
Woo!
[engine roars]
- Too fun.
[aggressive rock music]
- [Maria] Just enjoy it.
It goes better every burn!
[all shout]
- Yeah! - Yeah!
[car clangs]
[all cheer]
[aggressive rock music]
- [Jesse] One more!
[all cheer]
[aggressive rock music]
- Yeah, girl. Woo!
- Woo, yeah!
[engine roars]
[tires screech]
[upbeat music]
- Good job.
- Thank you.
- [Jesse] Mac Tools, Monster Garage CDs.
Good job, guys.
- Thank you.
- [Narrator] Late that night,
master painter Tom Prewitt shows up
to give the Black Widow her colors:
a Midnight Black body
and Blood Red hourglass to top it off.
[aggressive rock music]
Then the Widow gets some sticker shock
from Garage Graphics.
[aggressive rock music]
Monster Garage Factoid:
the average life expectancy of a Black Widow spider
is three years.
The average life expectancy of an American made car?
♪ Monster
♪ Monster Garage
- [Brett] Hello again, Monster aficionados!
I'm the Big Schwag.
- [Frankie] And I'm Frankie Whiteside.
- [Brett] And we are here at Irwindale Speedway
for what should be a historic Monster Garage challenge.
- [Frankie] Pulling up
in the freshly painted demolition derby monster
they call the Black Widow,
is Cindy Regimbald.
She spent a week in the garage with the all-girl team
building it,
and now she's about to wreck it.
- We're ready!
- [Brett] Hey, Frankie, she cleans up real good!
- [Frankie] Whoa, down boy!
- [Brett] Who are these dudes, Frank?
- [Frankie] The Black Widow's gotta pass inspection.
Let's listen up.
- Hey, Alex! - Yo, yo.
- Come here!
What have we got going here?
We can't have this stuff.
This is an unfair advantage.
We gotta have this stuff cut off,
and we need it cut off now.
[saw whines]
[aggressive rock music]
[metal clangs]
- [Brett] Look at the pile of steel
they cut off her monster!
- You gotta deal with it.
Go out there and do what you gotta do.
- [Frankie] They took all the sting out of her spider!
- [Brett] But Cindy's the real deal, folks!
A demolition queen from back east,
and she don't back down!
- [Frankie] It's monster time!
- [Brett] All right! What's her game plan, Frankie?
- [Frankie] Well, Schwag,
a demo derby is all about taking the other guy out.
The best way to get it done
is to crush the radiator in front
or take out the tires.
Everything else is gravy.
Schwag Man, look at this crowd!
This is the biggest crowd in Irwindale history!
[crowd whistles]
[engine rumbles]
- Are you ready for a demo derby?
- [Brett] And look at the MC!
The Hawaiian shirt, the palm are hanging off his fingertips.
That just spells, crash 'em up derby.
- [Announcer] Three, two, one!
Go!
- [Brett] And they're off!
- [Frankie] Schwag Man, this wet track is treacherous!
[engine roars]
[aggressive rock music]
[glass breaks]
- [Brett] Oh, you gotta be kidding me!
She got rocked on that one!
- [Frankie] Good thing she's wearing a neck brace!
- [Brett] Ouch!
- [Frankie] Nice one, Cindy!
- [Brett] This girl's got game, Frank!
[aggressive rock music]
[engine roars]
Watch Cindy and the Black Widow keeping her own, oh!
Everybody seems to be gunning for Cindy Regimbald
and the Black Widow, Frank!
[aggressive rock music]
♪ Went on from California
- Oh! - Oh!
- [Brett] Cindy Regimbald and the Black Widow
taking big hits, but also getting big hits!
- [Frankie] She's spunky, Schwag Man!
[engine roars]
- [Brett] She's like a bat out of hell, Frank!
Reverse, forward, it doesn't matter!
She wants to get her groove on,
and eat the competition up!
[engine roars]
[metal clangs]
[aggressive rock music]
[tires screech]
[car clanks]
- [Brett] The Black Widow is still in the game,
but it's started to take a heavy toll on the car, Frank.
- [Frankie] She's gotta be wearing down, Schwag Man.
This is brutal!
- [Brett] We have smoke
coming from the hood of the Black Widow, Frank!
Could that spell defeat?
- [Frankie] Schwag Man, I think this could be
the beginning of her demise.
[engine roars]
- [Brett] But she's still going!
The Black Widow is still rolling along!
Cindy Regimbald still dealing out punishment
with the hood on fire!
She can't even see with the smoke in the car, Frank!
- [Frankie] She's sucking smoke!
[car clangs]
[engine roars]
[car clangs]
- [Brett] Oh, that dude in the orange car
is gunning for Cindy!
[car clangs]
- [Frankie] Schwag Man, she has to keep restarting the car.
That is not a good sign!
- [Brett] There's still signs of life in the Black Widow!
You gotta be kidding me!
This all-girl build team has done their job!
[car clangs]
Oh, no!
Looks like Cindy's done for!
Game over!
[car clangs]
The Black Widow's been squashed!
- [Frankie] Oh, let's see that again!
- [Brett] It was that dude in the orange car
who delivered the k*ll shot!
Hands up in the air, Frank!
It's all over now!
- [Frankie] Oh, there's the checkered flag!
Look at that bucket of bolts!
- The Black Widow's done.
The car's done, going to the junkyard.
- [Brett] Keep your head up, kid!
- [Frankie] You done good, girl.
Okay, Schwag, she deserves your best.
Say it like you mean it.
- [Brett] Cindy's got no time for bad bumpers,
funny tail fins and builders named Crystal!
We've got metal to burn, sparks to fly,
the next Monster Garage challenge
is just around the bend!
[aggressive rock music]
♪ Monster, Monster Garage
♪ Monster, Monster Garage
♪ Monster, Monster Garage
♪ Monster, Monster Garage
♪ Monster, Monster Garage, yeah ♪
♪ Monster, Monster Garage
♪ Monster, Monster Garage
♪ Monster, Monster
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03x01 - Demo Derby
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A team of five people with mechanical, fabricating, or modifying expertise was assembled to modify a vehicle into a "monster machine."
A team of five people with mechanical, fabricating, or modifying expertise was assembled to modify a vehicle into a "monster machine."