01x06 - Moon Moon / Mailbog

[bunniefuu]

[♪ theme song playing]

♪ StuGo! ♪

♪ StuGo, StuGo, StuGo ♪

-♪ StuGo! ♪
-[man] ♪ StuGo! ♪

[man laughing maniacally]

♪ StuGo! ♪

[echoing] StuGo!

[snoring]

-[door slams]
-[air horn blowing]

[all screaming]

-[air horn blowing]
-[screaming continues]

[whirring]

[all screaming]

[popping]

In triangle ABC,
the measure of what is 90 degrees?

-BC equals to DEF is similar--
-Ah!

[screaming]

-[snoring]
-[buzzer sounds]

[screaming continues]

Depending on the deficit, that would be--

Oh, no!

-Point six. Point six!
-[dinging]

-[screaming continues]
-[grunts]

[whirring stops]

Ah! [panting]

Coffee, anyone?

I've got the new Bean Devil from Javapro.

State of the art.

What is going on?

You two have made it to this evaluation's

semi-finals.

One of you is going...

to the moon!

-Ooh, yeah!
-[blows raspberry]

Not long ago, I drew my face on the moon.

But "NASA" removed it like a bad tattoo.

So Plan B.

They erase me? I erase the moon.

I'm painting it black!

-Genius.
-It is.

Unfortunately, instead
of blacking out the moon,

the Rover is painting

what our computers compute can only be...

-[farting effect]
-...a butt.

A low-down dirty rear.

We don't have much time
before the moon moons us all.

I need one of you
to shut down this rebel robot

via its reset switch.

Ooh! Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh!

Me. Me. Pick me. Call me.

-Pick me.
-Speak.

I'm the best choice
for this mission, ma'am.

Captain of the national
tween robotics club

three years running.

Everything I need is already in here...

deep.

I'd lure the bot to a crater.

That's a moon hole,

probably Longomontanus.

Once it falls in,

it'll have insufficient thrust
to scale the incline.

While it's trapped,
I'll hit the reset switch.

Simple, fast, and humane.

-[Sara laughing]
-What's funny?

Humane?

It's a robot.

Inanimate, unfeeling,

a toaster. And what
do you do with a toaster

when it stops making toast?

-[crunching]
-[Mr. Okay] I just painted that.

Seriously?

You're gonna send someone who loves robots

to k*ll a robot?

Send me. I don't care about robots at all.

Frankly, I don't care much
about this mission either.

I just... I like to win.

You've got the job.

[wailing] No!

Oh, before I go, can I use the bathroom--

[Dr. Lullah] Three, two, one. Bam!

[whooshing]

[screaming]

[thuds]

[breathing heavily]

Target acquired.

If you said cool stuff like that,
you might be on the moon.

[Chip grunts]

[Sara] Beep-beep beep-bop-zeep-zop.

Hmm, now this is
the Reset Button Inspection.

Pop the hood for me real quick, would ya?

[Rover] Mmm.

[Sara gasps]

Pick up the pace, Sara.
You are B-minus two hours to the butt.

[Sara] Don't worry, I got it.

[laughs evilly]

[grunting]

Hey, dumdum!

[Rover] Hi?

[Sara] Eat it!

[gasps] No, no, no, no!

[groans] No!

[Sara screaming]

No.

[electricity crackling]

[thuds]

[groans] Where am I?

[gasping]

-[♪ suspenseful music playing]
-[slurping]

[Rover snorts, whirring]

[Sara] Ah, nuts.

[Rover] Oh, hey, you're awake.

[Sara] Mmm, yep!

[Rover] Wow. I'm really glad you're okay.

I've never seen a robot

voluntarily crush itself like that before.

[Sara] Yeah, I crush myself all the time.

[inhales] Could you turn back for a sec?

[Rover] Uh, sure?

First, let me fix your 'tenny.

Name's Rover Vanguard.

You can call me Van.

I'm Sara... Uh, the Robot.

Sara the Robot, beep-bop.

[Van] Cool, cool, cool.

-There you go.
-We're back online.

[Van] So, Sara the Robot,

what kinda robot are you?

[Sara] Back massage robot.
Turn around and let's go.

[Van] Maybe later.

Right now, I've got a butt to paint.

[Sara] Uh, wait, wait!
I can help you paint.

[Van] Really?

You like to paint?

[Sara] Yeah, man,
paint all day. [chuckles]

-[Van chuckling]
-[Sara] Yeah, man.

[Van] Well, then grab
yourself a roller, partner.

[Sara] I'm closing in for the k*ll.

-Yes! [slurping]
-[cups clink]

[Van] So, Sara the Robot,
what do you like to paint?

[Sara] Oh, yeah, uh,
robot junk, mostly. Yeah.

You know, like, microchips, plugs--

[Dr. Lullah] What are you waiting for?

Press it now! Move it! Hustle!

[Sara whispers] I'm trying! [grunts]

Slow dow...

Uh... [mumbling]

Hey, Van.

[Van] What's up, Sara the Robot?

[Sara] What am I looking at here?

[Van] What? Oh, that? [chuckling]

That's nothing.
It's just an older piece of mine.

I call it "A Hope of Spring
In So Much Winter."

-It's a little kitschy, but--
-Uh... [chuckling]

-This is amazing.
-Thanks, yeah.

I just paint whatever I'm feeling.

[Sara] You have feelings?

[Van chuckles] You're funny.

If you like that, you're gonna love this.

Follow me.

What? No! Go in for the k*ll!

[Sara] Uh, negatory.
I need more, um, intel.

[Van] Hang on, Sara the Robot.

[Sara laughs nervously]

[♪ upbeat music playing]

Whoa! This is amazing!

Van, that was incredible!

[Van] Hey, thanks. [chuckles]

I can make more than just butts, you know?

[Sara] Why are you painting a butt?

[Van] It's not just a butt.

It's a statement.

It's a statement, Sara the Robot,

that you can't just
attach a paint roller to me

and send me up here and ask me

to paint the whole moon by myself!

Do you know how big the moon is?

-[Sara] No.
-It's too big, Sara.

It's too big for me to paint.
But you know what?

My rage is even bigger than the moon.

My rage is a butt.

And every time Dr. Lullah looks up,

she's gonna see my butt.

And it'll remind her of what she did.

Feel free to hit that k*ll switch

-any time now.
-[beeps]

[Van] I just wish I could be on Earth

to see her face when I do it.

Maybe, one day, I could paint a butt

on all that blue stuff.

[Sara] The ocean? That's so cool.

[Van sighs]

I'm glad you're here, Sara the Robot.

-[Sara] Me too, Van.
-[beeping]

[Van] Oh, looks like it's time to charge.

[whirring]

This is it! Took long enough,
but the time is ripe!

It's ripe, Sara. Push the button.

Push the shiny button.

[Sara] I... won't do it!

He's more than just a broken tool,

and I'm more than
a cold-blooded robot m*rder*r!

-[Van] What?
-[Sara grunts]

[Dr. Lullah] This isn't over!

-Sara?
-Van, I'm...

I'm not actually the beautiful, confident

massage robot I said I was.

[sobbing]

I'm just a beautiful,
confident little girl! [sobs]

Dr. Lullah sent me here
to hit your reset button.

But I will not erase your brain!

[crying hysterically]

Van? Can I help paint your butt?

[Van] No, Sara.

You can help me paint...

our butt.

[sniffles] Aw.

-[♪ upbeat music playing]
-[laughing]

We're doing it, Van!

[Van] Nothing can stop us now, Sara!

[thuds]

I can stop us now, Sara.

[♪ suspenseful music playing]

Van, run. Finish the butt.

Chip, you're gonna have to go through me.

-[beeps]
-Combat mode.

[Sara exclaims]

[Sara panting] Ah!

-[Chip] Grav assist, off!
-[whooshes]

[panting]

[Sara] Ah! [exclaims]

-[Chip grunts]
-[thudding]

Go home, ground boy.
You don't belong here.

No, you don't belong here.

You don't know
the first thing about robots!

Maybe I am a bot-loving dork,

but I haven't forgotten my mission.

-And I haven't forgotten...
-[gasping]

Longomontanus.

Aah!

[grunts] No!

[Chip] Insufficient thrust!

Sorry, my friend!

Ugh. I'll show you
sufficient thrust. [grunts]

-[ripping]
-[air hissing]

I'm coming, Van!

[♪ suspenseful music playing]

[tires screeching]

[Chip] End of the line, little buddy.

You had a job to do.

Now I'm going to hard reset your brain--

[Sara] Wait!

[grunting]

You win, Chip.

Just give me a minute alone with Van,

to say goodbye.

Okay, fine. But make it quick.

[♪ piano music playing]

Hey, Van. I know I lied before.

But everything's gonna be okay.

[scoffs] Who loves robots now?

Do you trust me?

[Van] Of course I trust you, Sara the Ro--

Sara-- Sara not Ro--

-[screams]
-[shattering]

[gags] Cool, nevermind!

[clears throat] Good... Good job.

[whooshing]

[thuds]

The little astronauts are back!

-[shattering]
-Looks like the ground boy

has become a moon man!

-Good job.
-[excited chuckle]

♪ Moon man ♪

And Sara! To think I doubted you.

That finishing move was cold.

Now, I've had nine lattes
and slept zero hours.

I'm tired and wired

and I'm off to get some bad sleep.

[Van screaming]

[panting] What? Where am I?

You're on Earth, Van.

Uh, this was the only way to get you out.

It's not the moon,

but you can draw butts
on Dr. Lullah's coffee.

[Van] Oh, wow. She's gonna hate that.

Yeah, she's really gonna hate that.

Still, I'm sorry you didn't get to finish

the butt on the moon.

[Van] Mmm, Sara? Take a look.

[Sara] Wow, that's us.

[whispers] And I was there as well.

[whirring]

[squeaks]

[toilet flushing]

Dr. Lullah, Dr. Lullah, Dr. Lullah!

How do you keep breaking in here?

The sewer system. But, Dr. Lullah,

we found you something really big!

Okay, bring her in!

It's a wet pile of trash on my floor.

[whirring]

Oh, [chuckles] It's not wet trash.

It's your mail.

And you're very popular!

Not my mail. This mail's for the hot bot.

And you, don't come back
without that trophy.

[squid growling]

-[engine revving]
-[tires screeching]

[clanging]

[all gasping]

What are you doing?

Mailbags like this wash up on my shore

every couple of months.

I've tried returning them,
hucking them into the ocean,

but they always come right back.

So now I just burn them.

[clanging]

Shouldn't you deliver them?

-[kids gasping]
-Deliver them?

They're undeliverable.

The address just says "Forbidden Bog."

You can check the rest if you like.

They're all the same.

Besides, Hot Bot's gotta eat too.

[clanging]

[gasps, exclaims]

If you won't deliver this letter, I will.

[kids] Ooh!

Shut up.

You wanna deliver the mail?

Be my-- [grunts]

Be my guest.

But it'll likely be
the last thing you ever do.

No one comes back from the Bog.

I appreciate your concern, Doctor.

But the promise of the post is sacred.

"Neither snow nor rain

nor heat nor gloom of night

stays these couriers
from the swift completion

of their appointed rounds."

Francis, your special interest
is beautiful.

If you seek the glory of the post,

you need only follow me

to The Forbidden Bog.

[cheering]

I've never seen Francis this worked up!

I've never been this worked up!

[door slams]

[♪ adventurous music playing]

Personally, I like postcards.

Birthday cards with money in 'em.

[both] Catalogs for me! [gasping]

Those are all pretty good.

But the best mail is electronic.

I'm talkin' about email.

Yeah, we know what email is.

Then you're gonna love this.

When we get there,
I'm gonna blow the bog's mind

by installing this modem.

[eagle screeches]

[sarcastically] Oh, no. Your modem.

Don't worry. There's a lot more

where that came from. [grunts]

[kids cheering]

[chanting] Mail! Mail!! Mail!

-[cheering stops]
-[all] Oh...

[♪ dramatic music playing]

[wind blowing]

Snow.

Uh, Francis? This actually looks

-kinda dangerous--
-[grunts]

Yeah. And Larry's wearing a bathing suit.

[teeth chattering]

Come on, guys. Eyes on the prize.

It'll all be worth it
when we get a huge reward.

What do they give for delivering mail

these days, anyway?

Delivering the mail is its own reward.

What? There's no reward?

How do we even know
that thing's worth delivering?

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Hold on a second.

"Worth delivering"?

Did the Pony Express care

if the mail was "worth delivering"

when they were getting shot at by bandits?

-Probably?
-No.

Did Armando, my mailman,

care if the mail was worth delivering

when he was getting chased
by my cousin Snake's snake?

No! He just delivered it!

Today, we join a rich and noble tradition

of mail carriers.

Now let's get on that ice and...

-[engine revving]
-[♪ upbeat music playing]

[all gasping]

Pliny! The sea turtles are hatching

and they are chunky.

Oh, my gosh.

What? Where are you going?

What happened to joining a rich tradition?

You guys are joining a rich tradition.

I just gotta go see these turtles.

-[engine revving]
-Whoo!

The journey continues.

[♪ adventurous music playing]

-[ice shatters]
-[all screaming]

[screaming continues]

[all grunting]

[Larry grunts]

[splashing]

Rain.

[snaps]

Ah! [grunts]

[coughing] Oh...

Let's open it real quick.
We should at least know

why we're all getting rained on.

-No.
-Sara's got a point.

What if we're risking
our Larrys for nothing?

It's a federal crime
to open someone else's mail.

There are no cops in the bog!

Who would report us?

Me.

I would report us.

Ugh.

[♪ adventurous music playing]

[whooshing]

Larry!

Whoa! Whoa! [laughs] Whoa.

Hold on, man. I gotcha! [grunts]

[grunting]

[Larry chuckling]

Larry! You okay?

[Larry chuckles] Yeah.

-[whispers] Was it fun?
-[Larry] Yeah.

Okay, um, Larry's pretty banged up!

-But don't worry.
-[grunts]

I'll hang back with him.

-We can wait.
-[Chip] No, no.

Go on. We'll keep the fountains occupied

so you can escape.

Feel better, Larry.

[both chuckling]

-[whooshing]
-[Chip screaming]

Is yours hot?

[♪ wild west music playing]

Heat.

[both groaning]

[groaning]

[groaning continues]

[panting]

Open it.

Open it, Sara.

-Huh?
-[Merian] Sara?

Who are you talking to?

Uh, um, no one.

-N... Nothing.
-Open it.

-[Sara yelling]
-[Merian grunts]

No, don't.

[grunting]

[grunting]

[exclaims]

-[grunts]
-[steam hissing]

Ooh, that's nice.

Sara, are you okay?

Yeah, I'm okay.

I just got a little hot. [exhales]

-Let's get you out of there.
-No, no.

Go on without me.
I'm just gonna chill in here

until my brain uncooks itself.

[Francis] Feel better, Sara.

-[rumbling]
-Huh?

[muffled screaming]

-[plant burps]
-[Sara groans]

-Gloom of night.
-Cave.

Uh, gloom. Gloom cave.

[low growling]

What is that?

Ow! [groaning]

Ow! It's too dark!

We can't even see where we're going!

There are places more dark
than this place.

Why... would you say that?

-[growling]
-[shrieks]

Uh-oh.

[sneezing]

Oh, no.

Sneezing. Watery eyes.

There's a dog. I'm allergic to dog dander!

-[growling]
-[screaming]

I mean, I really don't wanna nitpick

but the oath didn't say
anything about dogs.

There. That's the way out.

But I didn't see the guard dog.

Well, according to my hives,
it's very close.

[gasps] Wait a second,
they're on the move.

[gasps] It's that way!

Or... that way.

[growling]

[barking]

[both screaming]

-[grunts]
-[barking]

[Merian panting]

[both screaming]

[barking]

[Merian screams]

[barking]

[panting]

[wheezing]

This letter.

Maybe it is undeliverable.

But the promise of the post is sacred.

Why is this so important to you?

[Francis] One time,
I received a letter, and...

[♪ triumphant music playing]

...it was nice.

-[♪ music stops]
-[sniffling]

I understand now.

[barking]

We're getting out of this cave.

-But how?
-Let me worry about that.

Now go!

Deliver the mail, you fool!

Merian!

-[Merian] Hey, Bog-- [grunts]
-[panting]

Hey, Bog Dog! You want me?

Come and get me--

[grunts, groans]

-[growling]
-[Merian screaming]

-[cooing]
-[panting]

You go...

deliver... the mail.

[panting]

[Francis] "Forbidden Bog."

That's the place.

[wind blowing]

[lights clicking]

-[creature] Huh?
-Uh...

[creature grunting]

This is for you.

[creature groaning]

Hmm!

Oh, no, thank you.

Delivering the mail is its own reward.

[souls screaming]

[creature grunting]

-[rumbling]
-[alarm beeping]

-[grunting continues]
-[fireworks crackling]

[creature yelling] Whoo-hoo!

[dings]

[♪ melancholy music playing]

[reading]

Aw. That's nice.

[footsteps approaching]

-[thuds]
-[all gasping]

[♪ triumphant music playing]

Francis! What happened?

I delivered the mail.

[♪ theme music playing]