04x14 - All in the Famiglia

[bunniefuu]

♪ There's a time for love
and a time for livin' ♪

♪ So take a chance
and face the wind ♪

♪ An open road and
a road that's hidden ♪

♪ A brand-new life
around the bend ♪

♪ There were times ♪

♪ I lost a dream or two ♪

♪ Found the trail ♪

♪ And at the end was you ♪

♪ There's a path you take
and a path not taken ♪

♪ The choice is
up to you, my friend ♪

♪ Nights are long
but you might awaken ♪

♪ To a brand-new life ♪

♪ Brand-new life ♪

♪ A brand-new life
around the bend ♪♪

Captioning made possible by
columbia pictures
television, inc.

Ok, angela,
are you ready?

Ready, tony.

This is it.

Tighter.

Tighter.

With more passion,
more passion.

Good, good.
Now kiss me.

How was that?

Very old world.
My family will love you.

I want your family
to be my family.

You know what I mean.

Ok, angela. Look.
Here's the clincher.

If you can
master this hug,

They'll swear
you're italian.

I call it the
butterfly flutter.

It goes
something like this.

May I try?

You may.

Oh, bene, bene.

Grazie, grazie!

Well, have the niña, pinta
and the santa maria docked?

Any minute now.
Any minute, mona.

Buon giorno, mamma.

Angela, you
never kissed me
like that before.

Don't do it again.

Hey, everybody,
look what I got!

Viva italia. Your family's
going to love it.

I don't remember
a rooster

On the italian
flag.

This is uganda.

Hey! What a rip-off!

[Doorbell rings]

Ok.

This is it--
la famiglia micelli.

Hug and flutter.

Right. Right. Ok.

Come in!

[Speaking italian]

Hey, laura, maurizio!

Hey, everybody. This is
my great aunt rosa,

My uncle aldo,

And these are my cousins
laura and maurizio.

This is angela, mona,
and jonathan.

Signora.

Mona, come sta?

Benvenuti
in america.

Grazie.

Oh, aunt rosa,

You're as beautiful
as ever.

Dice che tu sei
sempre bella.

[Speaking italian]

My sister says
you are full of it.

Here. Sit, sit, sit.

Uncle aldo, you're
speaking english.

Ah, yes, of course.

You got to learn english
for business.

A businessman must learn
english and japanese.

Especially japanese.

Basta.

[Speaking italian]

Aldo, I thought you were
your family's big cheese.

I am the big cheese,

But aunt rosa
is the main mozzarella.

Hey, everybody.

Look at my baby cousins.

Little laura
and little maurizio, huh?

Uh, good genes.

I like the ones
he's wearing.

Would you please?

Tony, it's so good
to finally meet you.

My successful
american cousin.

A cleaning executive.

Uh, yeah. I'm
the lee iacocca
of squeegies.

Hey,
look at this.

Sit, sit.
Come here.

I envy you.
College in rome.

What do you study?

Renaissance art...

Michelangelo,
da vinci, botticelli.

I have bruce
springsteen posters.

That is a work of art.

Come on. You're
bunking with me.

Jonathan,
grab the bags.

I'll pay


Wow! What's that
worth, maurizio?

About a nickel.

Ah, well.
Money's money.

What can I get you?

Campari, espresso,
cappuccino?

Diet pepsi.

Si. Diet pepsi, too.

Same for me.

When in rome...

Four diet pepsis
coming up.

This is all so new for her,
I'll go and help.

Aunt rosa...ohh, so...

How's your health?
How's the farm?
How's the family?

Perche no e sposato?

Why you are
not married?

I will be someday,

But now's
not the time.

Baloney.

I teach her that.

Thanks, uncle aldo.

Ooh...make, uh,
micelli bambini?

Oh, no, no.
It's not possible.

Oh?

Now, tony...

Maybe it was
a baseball injury
that you...

Oh, no!
It's possible.

Si.

O, si.

It's possible.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Because you're here, I'll
cook a big dinner friday.

To celebrate
our visit,

I have
a big surprise for you.

A surprise for me?
Wh-wh-what is it?

All I'll say is
a big, big surprise.

You got it
on the airplane.

We got aunt rosa
on the plane, too.

[Snoring]

Hi.

Hi.

W-was I snoring?

Yes...
But not as loud
as aunt rosa.

Ahh.
What time is it?

It's 7:00,
italy time.

That's 1:00 here.

Good night.

You know, tony,
ever since I was a boy,

I idolized you.

You were my hero,
my famous american cousin.

I can sleep
anytime, eh.

I remember...

When I was a child,

I'd watch films of you
in the final playoff game.

You were, eh...dyn-o-mite.

Yeah, I was.

Even though you don't
play baseball anymore,

In my eyes
you'll always
be the champion.

Well, thanks,
maurizio.

Hey, I got
something for you.

Swing around.

Now, let's see, uh...

Here it is, huh?

From one champion
to another.

Tony...
Your cardinals' cap.

Thank you, grazie,

But I couldn't.

No, go ahead.
It's yours.

Thank you.
I'll wear it
in the village

And in
the vineyards.

I'll never
take it off.

Well, then I'm glad
I didn't give you
my sweat socks.

My stomach is...
On italy time.

I'm a little hungry.

We'll go
hit the kitchen.

By the way, uh...

Got any girlfriends
in italy?

Lots of girlfriends.
I'm a micelli, eh.

He-e-ey.
Come on, let's go.

M-may I try?

Hmm?

Me.

Ok.

Woo-hoo.

This is fun.

No!

[Speaking italian]

Make more strong.

Make...more big.

Hey.

Hey, get a load
of this.

Angela's cooking.
Aunt rosa's smiling.

What's wrong
with this picture?

You're making
fresh biscuits.

This is
like the farm.

Sit down.
I'll get you something.

Oh, it must be
a wonderful life,
maurizio.

Getting back
to basics,

Cooking
from scratch,

Working the soil,

Breathing fresh air,

Getting up
before the sunrise--

Angela,
we get the picture.

Hey, tony,
e bella, eh?

Una bella faccia.

Eh! Look like...
Farah fawcete.

Farah fawcett?

Si, farah fawcett.

Well, I hate
to roll and run,

But I've got
a 7:45 train
in the morning.

I...

Buona notte.

O, buona notte,
cara, eh.

Buona notte.

Grazie.

I scored big.

Way to go, farah.

Buona notte.

Buona notte.

O, che bella,
bellissima.

Una bella donna.

Eh, tony,
tu dovresti
sposare angela.

You should
marry angela.

Angela e carina.

Angela e
molta intelligente.

Aunt rosa says angela's
so smart and sweet.

May I add warm, spontaneous,
and so beautiful?

I wish you two matchmakers
would lighten up.

Angela and I
are housekeeper and boss

And nothing else.

Niente?

Un bello uomo,

Una bella donna
nella questa casa,

E niente?

Aunt rosa says

Beautiful woman,

Handsome man

In the same house,

And nothing?

Hey, nothing.

Stupido!

Aunt rosa says--

I got it.

Well, I guess we're
all finished here.

Anybody have
any big surprises

They want to
give me now?

All right.
It is time.

Sit down, tony.

Tony, I have
the great pleasure
to present to you...

This, uh...
Special surprise.

Oh, uncle aldo.

Oh, thank you.
Oh, boy. Oh, boy. It's--

It's dirt.

And--and a raisin.

That is the soil
from your vineyard in italy.

My vineyard?

I give you 20 acres
from my land in italy.

Ohh...

Oh!
Oh!

Here's to italy's
newest winemaker.

Hey, hey.
Move over, mondavi.

Here comes micelli. Hey!

Ahh, micelli wine...

Unpretentious
yet hunky.

Hey, hey.
Look at my dirt, huh?

Hey, hey, hey.

Attenzione,
attenzione.

Now
I make announce.

Presto avremo
una nuova bella sposa

Nella famiglia micelli--

Angela, angela, angela.

Brava, brava!

What is she saying?

I think
she's talking about you.

Soon, we will
welcome a new bride

In the micelli family--

Angela, angela, angela.

Aw, she's at it again.

Aspetta. Il amirratore
di angela me ha detto

Che la da
rispetto e amore.

Angela's admirer
says that he has

A great respect
and a great love.

Go for it,

Maurizio!

Hey, hey,
maurizio!

Me and maurizio?

Take it, angela,
or I will.

What are they
talking about
out there?

They're naming
your bambinos.

And I hope you like
isadore, salvatore,

And guido,
and giuseppe,
and aldo junior.

All I wanted
was your family
to like me.

How did
this happen?

I apologize
for my family.

He's just
a young boy

Who finds a chic,
sophisticated
career woman

Wildly attractive.

Oh...

And that's
your husband's
funeral procession?

Beautiful.

Have you seen these,
aldo?

Many, many times.

And that's
your husband.

He looks so...

Relaxed.

Uh, uncle aldo...

Aunt rosa, we have
to speak to you.

Oh, my, look
at the time.

Aunt rosa,
grazie, grazie,

For sharing these
wonderful memories
with me,

Even though
it bored me
out of my gourd.

Prego, prego.

Listen, uncle aldo,
aunt rosa...

I have something
I got to tell you.

Angela doesn't want
to marry maurizio.

What?

Why, this is terrible.

Th-this is awful.

Angela non e sposarsi
maurizio.

Wait a minute.
What's so funny?

I don't know, but
when she's happy,
I'm happy.

[Speaking italian]

You are playing
hard to get.

You smart.

I think something
got lost in the translation.

Uh, uncle aldo...

Please try
to understand.

I think maurizio
is a wonderful
young man,

But I'm afraid
I don't love him.

You don't?

She don't.

I understand.

You make
your decision.

You say no.

We must respect
your decision.

What if I throw
in a maserati?

No, eh?

Now I got trouble.

I got to explain
to your aunt rosa.

♪ Wo-oh-oh ♪

♪ Cantare ♪

♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh ♪♪

Uh-oh-oh-oh.

Angela, I got
these flowers for you.

Oh, maurizio,
thank you.

They're beautiful.

Would you put them
in the vase over there?

I would be honored.

Thank you.

What do I say
to him?

It'll be better
if I tell him.

No, it's
my responsibility

As the object
of his furious passion.

Angela,
he's my cousin.

We have a special
relationship.

Ok.

Thank you.

What a fox.

Sit. Have
a seat here.

Sure.

I want to
talk to you

About the fox.

You see,
maurizio, uh...

Angela's feelings
for you,

They're not...

I know they're not
the same as my feelings.

You know that?

She'll learn
to love me.

I'm a micelli, hey!

Hey, hey. Yeah.

Um...you know,
maurizio...

You couldn't
have picked
a finer woman.

I know.

She's, uh, elegant,
sophisticated, intelligent,

And, uh...

She has
a great pair of legs.

Yeah, they are nice.

And, uh...she loves
the country life.

Oh, yeah, yeah.
She's a regular
minnie pearl.

But you see,
maurizio,

Here's the thing,
see.

Her life's here.
Her family's here.
They need her.

I know that there
will be problems,

But, eh...

Love
destroys everything.

You mean
love conquers all.

Ah, that's it.

I'm crazy
for this woman.

Angela and I have
grown very close

The past few years,

And we have a warm
and confused
relationship.

And I'd like it
to stay that way.

Tony, i, uh...
I think I understand.

I would never
do anything to hurt you.

Thanks, maurizio.

It's too bad we had to
wait 20 years to meet.

You ok?

I'm a little sad,
but I'll be ok.

Anyway, this has been
a great adventure.

I came to america.
I met my cousin.

I fell in love.
I lost a woman...

That's true.

And I got a cap.

And you still
got three days left.

I'll tell you what.

I'm taking you
to see the rockettes.


A hundred legs.

They do
something like this.

Here, check this out.

Get your liras ready.
I'm loading the van.

I got all
the heavy ones.

Thank you, sam.

I love my poster
of bruce springsteen.

Thank you for
teaching me about
italian history.

I never knew gucci
started in 1903.

I will, uh...
Never forget you.

To me, america will mean
the statue of liberty,

The rockettes,

And, uh...
Angela bower.

Thank you, maurizio.

And to me,

Italy
will always be...

Youth and passion.

Hey, maurizio...come.

I want the neighbors
to see me walk out with you.

Arrivederci,
aunt rosa.

Arrivederci, mrs. Bower.

Oh, come on.
You can't leave
like this!

It's not right.
It's not italian.

Uncle aldo...

Che?

Rosa, rosa...

No.

Te io giuro.

Angela, cara mia!

[Speaking italian]

There you go.

Arrivederci.

Now, wait a minute.
What did you say?

That we'd probably
get married someday.

Wait a minute.

You told them that?

I had to make peace
in the family somehow.