04x12 - Headin' for Trouble

[bunniefuu]

[Knock on door]

Who's knocking at the door

This early in the morning?

This building better be on fire!

What's happening, baby?

Roscoe, what are you doing here?

I should be the one with the bad attitude.

Your head look bigger when you ain't got on no makeup.

When I moved in here,

I thought I was getting away from you.

Why are you following me?

First of all, I'm not following you.

My mother sent me here to live with my daddy.

And I'm just glad that he lives in the building.

So I can get a look at you.

Aw...hee hee.

After you put on your makeup--

After you put your rouge, your blush,

Your little lippy lipstick-- all of that stuff.

I'm going back to bed.

Goodbye. Goodbye, roscoe.

Hey, boy, don't touch!

I didn't touch. I want to talk to you.

What do you want?

I seen this delivery truck downstairs.

They was delivering this big old bed up here.

The bed was real big.

Yes! That's my new brass bed that I ordered!

What happened to your old bed?

You wear it out doing the grownup, huh?

Captioning made possible by warner bros.

Whwh

♪ Martin ♪

♪ Oh, yeah ♪

♪ Ooh, yeah, yeawhazzup!♪

♪ I'm the man ♪

Tin ♪♪

Bruce, come on! Stop lollygaggin'.

Hey, man, be careful with that.

What? Man, why don't you just let me do my job?

Put a dent in my headboard,

I'm going to put a dent in your damn wallet.

Relax, man. You got the nefertiti .

Mmm.

It's made of solid brass

From the hills of north africa.

And it's virtually indestructible.

Well, good.

'Cause I'm virtually unstoppable.

Martin...

Martin, not in front of the mover, baby.

Well, as soon as they leave,

We gonna...

Hey!

No! Hey!

Look, let me warn you about your new mattress.

Watch those springs.

You could bounce a coin from here to new york

On that baby.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Just go in the back and do what you do.

All right.

Here's an extra dollar.

Whoop-de-doo.

A whole dollar.

Yeah. Use it for a down payment on a new attitude.

Now please, man, go do what you do.

You two sure are in a hurry.

That little snot-nosed kid down the hall

Told me you was newlyweds.

If I were you,

I would take advantage of our extended warranty program.

Well...

Put us down for the lifetime plan.

Yeah. There you go.

All right.

Right on.

All right, baby.

Start your engines, girl.

We about to take that new bed for a test drive.

I got this big presentation today, o.k.?

If the client likes it, I'll get the account.

Now back up off me!

Baby, look, come on.

Let's jump in that thing

And make the bedsprings sing.

Well, it did look a little springy.

Ah ha ha ha.

And, martin, I've never slept

On a brass bed before.

So...

So check it out.

If you're feeling, like, extra freaky...

I'll let you snatch the tags off the mattress.

Wanna do that? Wanna snatch 'em off?

All right!

We'll do this, martin,

But, uh, let's make this snappy.

Baby, I'm happy to make it snappy.

I don't think the dump will take this one.

We gonna have to burn it.

Martin! How long have you had that old mattress?

For a long time.

It used to be mama's when she was a kid.

As evil as that woman is,

I thought she slept on a bed of nails.

Ha ha ha ha!

Now, that's really funny.

Ha ha ha ha!

Not as funny as me throwing your a*s out.

Now step.

Step.

Come on, baby.

Let's ride the new bed back to africa, baby.

Aw, damn.

Aah!

Hello. Can I speak to ?

Yeah, this is an emergency.

All right, I'll hold. Damn!

Martin! Hurry up!

Look, baby, don't panic.

I got on the line.

Hey, look here.

Uh, , my woman, uh, she's stuck in bed.

We bought this new bed,

So we got to bouncin',

Doin' this old freaky deaky-type thing,

And aw--aw, damn!

Just use your imagination, all right?

Martin! What are they saying?

Aw, baby, they laughing at us, gina.

Martin! Please, martin, help me!

Turn sideways!

Turn sideways.

Ow! Ow!

My head hurts! Ow!

Gina! Gina! Gina!

It's heavy!

Swivel your head.

You got to pivot, gina.

I can't get out! I can't get out!

Oh! Oh!

Gina, I'm suing the hell out of that bed company!

How are you going to get me out?

Martin, I got to get to work!

I can't miss this meeting!

All right, now, look!

Gina, look!

Let's not lose our head on this one!

Baby, we just got to think our way

Out of this, o.k.?

O.k., Martin, please hurry!

I think my head is swelling.

Damn, baby.

I didn't think your head could get no bigger.

Boy, don't start with me.

I swear, this is very serious.

Tell you what, gina.

I'm going to butter you up.

And bam, you're out, baby.

That's how I got into this mess!

Just hand me the phone!

I got to make a call!

Who are you gonna call, gina?

Unsolved mysteries?

Baby, even they can't solve this one, gina.

I got to call work

To tell them I'm going to be a little late.

Look, look, gina, here.

Baby, I'll tell you what.

Let's go back in the bedroom,

Retrace our steps,

And bam, free at last, baby.

Shh! Shh! Hello?

Mr. Oaks? Yeah, this is gina payne.

Excuse me.

Um, listen.

I'm going to be a few minutes late, o.k.?

No, no! I'll make the meeting.

Yes.

No!

No! I'll be there, o.k.? No problem.

O.k., Sir. Yes, sir.

No. Nothing's wrong.

O.k. Yes, sir. Goodbye.

Oh, damn! Martin, take the phone!

Uuunnnhh!

All right, baby. Gina! Gina!

Uuunnnhh!

O.k., Baby.

Oh, no! No! No!

Martin, look at me!

I look like bozo behind bars!

All right, baby, look.

It's not that bad, gina.

I hear red teeth are in these days, baby.

You know what? This is all your fault.

Wait! Wait! Whoa!

What do you mean, my fault?

I told you I had a meeting to get to,

But you just had to try out the new bed!

Man! I knew we was headin' for trouble.

Hey, look, gina, don't blame me, baby.

You the one wanted to try the double backflip.

[Knock on door]

Who is that?

That--that's tommy and pam.

What?

I asked them to help.

Damn! I don't want them to see me like this!

Go on.

Keep it going, girl.

Keep it going.

Oh! Pam!

Turn off the video camera, pam!

Turn off the video camera, pam!

No, girl, I'm sending this

Toamerica's funniest home videos.

You gonna make grand prize for this one!

Gina, gina, it's o.k.

Gina, just one question.

How the hell did this happen?

I be strokin'.

That's what I be doin'.

I be strokin'.

You are so nasty.

That's how we got into--

That's nasty!

Cut the chatter and get this thing off me!

What can I do to help?

I'll tell you what you could do.

To help her get out of that,

Tell us how you sneak out

Of your cage at the kennel.

I mean, how do you just get out?

Only if you can tell me

How you can walk under a door

With it being closed, inch-high.

Just make yourself useful

And start chewing through the bars.

Shut up!

I'll see if the company can send somebody over.

I got an idea.

You think the two of us can pull these bars apart?

Now you thinkin', man!

Now you're thinkin', tommy!

[Straining]

Stop! Stop! Everybody!

Just stop!

Look, I got to sit down.

I feel like I'm a little-- y'all know.

I know you ain't feeling lightheaded, gina.

Look, just sit me on the couch, please.

There you go.

[Yelling] gina, do you want me to get you a pillow?

Where am I gonna put it, man?

Where am I gonna put it?

Tommy, get on away from me!

The company is sending somebody over at noon.

Oh, that's perfect!

My meeting doesn't start until :.

Yes!

Whoo!

You don't want to get ahead of yourself.

Y'all got one more head joke up in here,

And--oh--i swear!

Also called work, and the client has to leave early,

So the meeting's been pushed up to :.

What? No! No!

That only leaves me...

A half hour!

How can I make that, pam?

Baby, all you got to do is call in sick.

Tell 'em you got a headache this big, baby.

It's just spinnin'.

Just spinnin'.

O.k., Guys.

That only leaves us with one choice.

Here we go.

What the--

What the hell, man.

You just happen to have a blowtorch with you.

I need this for work, man.

You ain't got no job!

Just get her out of there, man, please.

I don't know about this.

Don't worry, gina. Just relax.

I know what I'm doin'.

No!

There. All done.

Damn thing is still around her neck!

I didn't want to burn her.

Y'all got to get this thing off of me.

You can barely notice it.

At least you can

Get through the damn door now.

To go where, tommy?

I look like I'm wearing a car wreck!

Man! I'm going to lose my job.

Look, baby, it's not that bad.

Gina, baby, it kind of looks like...

Designer jewelry, baby.

Don't it, pam?

Don't it look like it's flowing on her?

Designer jewelry. Yeah.

I think I saw jada pinkett rockin' something like that

At the, um...

Image awards! Image awards!

Sh-she did for real, y'all?

Gina, she did, yes.

Gina...

You wear this with pride, baby!

Remember, you are a nubian princess.

Remember, this, baby,

Came from the hills of north africa.

Bam.

Well, maybe...

Maybe I can play this off.

If it's good enough for jada pinkett,

It's good enough for me!

Go get!

Go ahead!

Dance, baby!

[Shouting encouragement]

Gina, I think I'm gonna get me one.

You know, personally, gina,

Girl, all eyes gonna be on you.

I--i do look good, don't i?

I mean, what y'all think?

Aw, baby...

Gina...

Yeah.

I think we lied, baby!

All this look tore up, gina!

Just raggedy all around your neck.

We can't let you go out like that.

Why'd y'all hype me up like that?

What am I gonna do, y'all?

Maybe we can use something to cover it up, huh?

That's right!

Just hide it for the meeting.

Hey, try my scarf!

Yes, pam!

Baby, be careful.

Shake the fleas out first, please.

I don't want gnats on her neck

Just biting.

O.k.!

Wh-what do y'all think?

Uh... Uh... Uh...

Nah. Nah. Nah.

You know, we need something bigger, man.

Something that will drape.

Hey...hey, hey!

Try this indian blanket.

Yes! This will work!

O.k.

There you go.

What y'all think?

It kind of matches. It's maroon.

Oh, baby!

Yeah.

Baby!

You can tell them you got indian in your family.

Y'all are stupid.

She looks like choke-ahontas!

Yeah. I guess you're right.

We're going to need something thick and dark to cover it.

We're going to need something thick and dark to cover it.

Uh, give me a little bit of your back fur.

Snatch it off so I can put it right around here.

Um, can I get anyone some more coffee, croissants,

Magazines?

Oaks, I thought you wanted my account.

Doesn't this gina know I've got money to spend?

Oh--oh--oh!

I'm sure gina will be here any minute.

I believe she's in the ladies room

Getting her head together.

Well, if she wants to get her head in this business,

She better learn how to be on time.

I'm out of here.

Mr. Whitaker, please, please.

Two minutes, that's all.

I am so sorry I'm late!

You're looking great. You're looking great.

You're looking darling.

Your hair is a muss!

Darling, I want to hook you up with my beautician later.

Mr. Oaks, I'm so sorry I'm late.

Young lady, what do you want?

There's a meeting going on here.

I know, mr. Oaks.

It's me, gina payne?

Gina?

Mr. Whitaker, just one minute, please.

All right, I'm going.

Isn't her new hair fierce?

I love that hair, darling!

Darling, thank you.

Shh!

Gina, don't you realize

That this is the most important meeting of your career?

Yes, mr. Oaks.

I'm giving you visual, darling.

I'm giving you all of me.

I'm warning you!

I'm going to do this.

You better!

Both of you.

Let's get started, shall we?

But first...

How's everybody doing?

Oaks, what are you running here?

Is this a presentation or a diana ross concert?

Sir! Excuse me. I heard that.

This is a presentation.

And, by the way, since you mentioned diana ross,

You know, you remind me a little bit of...

Billy dee williams inmahogany?

Well, flattery will get you everywhere.

You go on and do that presentation.

There you are, billy.

I mean, mr. Whitaker.

So we feel a shift in your marketing strategies

Will result in better sales and greater profits.

I'm sorry. Your hair was in the way.

Can I see that last chart again?

Sure. I'm so sorry.

What the hell?

So in conclusion,

Shifting your advertising from tv to radio

Will double your sales. Thank you.

[Pam clapping]

Wonderful!

Strong-jay!

Strong-jay!

You want me to help you clean out your office?

Yeah.

Mr. Whitaker, I assure you,

I had nothing to do with this.

That's too bad, oaks, 'cause I liked it!

You did?

Yeah, I did.

You liked my presentation?

Yeah, but I really liked how you kept talking

Like you didn't know you had that headboard around your neck.

Is that a nefertiti ?

Yes! How did you know that?

Same thing happened to me and my wife

A couple of years ago.

We was getting our freak on.

That is, uh, very interesting, sir,

But, uh, do we get the account?

Well, anyone with enough gumption

To stand here talking with a headboard around their neck

Is someone I want to do business with.

You've got our account.

Thank you!

Thank you so much, mr. Whitaker.

I always said she had a good head on her shoulders.

Can we talk for a minute?

Your wife, how she get this thing off?

Get it off?

I'm just kidding.

I'll give you the number of our welder.

Thank you so much.

Aw, baby. I'm proud of you, gina.

Thank you.

Baby, it took guts to go out there like that.

'Cause, baby, you was a wreck-up from the neck up.

I'm just glad it's all over

And it worked out.

I'm just glad we got that extended warranty.

I set up your new headboard.

Now sign these papers and let me get out of here.

You and your attitude, man, I'll tell you.

Did you hook it up the way we wanted it?

Yeah, this one is thickly padded,

And we bolted it to the wall.

Even you two can't break it.

Uh, on second thought,

Maybe I better go to the shop

And get some more bolts.

Man, just step, o.k.? Just step.

Yeah, please. Step, please.

Now let's go back in the bedroom

And pick up...

Where we left off.

Oh...no, martin.

Forget that. Uh-uh.

The same thing can't happen twice.

Your head wasn't the one stuck in the bed, all right?

Don't worry, o.k.?

I got us some protection this time.

How 'bout that?

I'm about to tackle you, you little tight end.