04x13 - The Play's the Thing

[bunniefuu]

[female narrator] Previously on "The Real World.."

My senior year of high school

I had a contract to put my play on

downtown, you know, in this theater.

He wrote a play, to me, that's, like, incredible.

Every time I've seen him he's only been playing pool

'watching TV or writing letters.'

I don't wanna spend my whole life saying

"God, I was in London, I had all this time

and I didn't go for it."

As soon as I walked into the theater

I mean, I knew it would be perfect to put my show on.

[Kat] This is the true story..

[Neil] Of seven strangers..

Seven strangers..

[Jacinda] Picked to live in a house..

[Jay] And have their lives taped..

[Lars] To find out what happens..

[Mike] When people stop being polite..

[Sharon] And start getting real.

"The Real World," London.

Alright.

Well, it turns out

that I'm not gonna be able to do my play in that theater.

[Mike] The Fortune or Oriental?

The Fortune or anything like it.

'It has to be completely low profile.'

- 'Really?' - Ain't that a b*tch?

It's like I'm on a tourist visa, I'm only here for five months.

And, uh, I found out that, uh

I wouldn't be able to take on a commercial venture.

I wouldn't be able to spend, even if I didn't make any money

even if I covered my losses, I couldn't do it.

- 'I'm sorry.' - So, whatever.

Just set it up here, and do it here one night.

We'll bring all our American friends.

We'll take this table, move it.

- You can do it right here. - I'll get up on the balcony.

Have balcony seating.

We'll have seating there, seating all around here.

You can do it up on this stage.

'That would be so cool.'

[Jay] I sincerely think Mike was interested

in really seeing it happen.

To me, that really was a cool thing.

I'm just not, you know, not

not so certain about how much

you know, how much I want it to happen.

You wanna try to do it? I'll help you do it.

[Jay laughs] 'Look at you, man, you just want your percent.'

Jay Frank's "Bedroom, Unplugged."

[Mike] 'Alright, Lars, this is what we're doing'

'last weekend in April.'

'Jay's putting on "Bedroom" right here.'

We're gonna put his bed here, we're gonna get

chairs and the couch, and set 'em all around.

I think we can get thirty people.

- Thirty, easily. - 'Easily.'

[Jay] 'Then when I go back to Portland'

Jay Frank's "Bedroom" returned from its hit run

on the West End, of Jay's living room.

As far as theater goes, I mean, London is about it.

There's a lot more going on here

directly related to what I wanna do with my life

than I've ever found anywhere else.

I'm from, uh, Portland, Oregon in the States.

Like the first time I was in Leicester Square

I got in line, I just started talking to people.

People interested in theater

and you know, I can tell 'em, you know, I'm a playwright

from the United States

and people get interested

in what I've done and what I'm doing.

My play I wrote was a one-man show

so I put it on and-and so, made some money and so..

- What was it called? - It's called "Bedroom."

[female #] 'Oh, cheeky.'

[laughing] No, not like..

Is that how you mean to go on, eh?

Oh, what's the next one gonna be?

"Jay Straight."

Huh. "Saudi Arabia."

Yeah, three letters for Jay.

[Mike] 'Oh, you got an e-mail.'

'Oh, you also have two letters out there.'

'One's for a guy named Jay Straight.'

'I don't think that's you, 'cause it's from Saudi Arabia.'

That's from my dad.

See, that's my birth name. Straight.

'So, that's what he still calls me.'

[Mike] 'What do you mean, that's your birth name?'

I was born Jay Straight.

And, uh, I was raised by my stepdad.

And, uh, my stepdad adopted me, and I took on his last name.

[Mike] 'How'd your dad feel about that?'

Oh, he didn't like it, but he's come to accept it.

That's amazing that he still keeps contact with you.

[Jay] 'No, not really.'

I mean, it was strange

because it was in, I was in the th grade.

We had to go to court, and my dad was his own attorney.

And so he was, like, cross-examining me

on the stand, right?

'It was really strange.'

I got pulled out of camp to go to court against my dad

in order to be adopted by my stepfather.

[Mike] 'Did you want to be adopted by your stepfather?'

Yeah. I mean, he's raised me

ever since I was a little kid.

So, it's like out of respect

there's no way I could say no.

'You know, and it caused, it caused problem'

with me and my dad for a while

but now, we got, we got past it.

The last time I saw him was the summer

and he came and saw my play.

He was nervous about what the play was gonna be.

I never let him read it.

Obviously, he's an intelligent enough man to know that

not knowing your father for a great portion of your life

is gonna probably be the main focus of the play.

And when he left, it's like he didn't bring himself around

to tell me that he was leaving.

And then finally I got a letter here in London.

And so then I-I kept trying to get

in contact with him on the phone.

[dial tone]

- Were they married? - Yeah.

- When you were born? - Yeah.

Split up after a year or two years.

Something like that, I don't know.

[Jay] I think for me, the most important time

I spent with Mike was

when he was talking about his dad.

He feels that he has a lot to prove to his dad.

And, uh, I went through that, that same whole thing for..

I mean, it-it ran my life

for the majority of my lifetime.

- Jeez, I suck! - Don't sweat it, man.

And after my play and everything

I kind of came to a point

of accepting the way things are

and kinda letting go of it.

And Mike's kinda just getting to that point now.

I see girls wearing guy's boxers as shorts.

♪ Every day's sunshine ♪

♪ Every day's sunshine ♪♪

♪ Da-da da-da-da da-da da-da-da ♪♪

Faster! Stop slacking.

Get your knees up, boy.

[Jay] I think the mood in the house

has changed over the last couple weeks.

I just feel that the people have a better sense

of who each other is.

Mike, started doing racing stuff

and seeing Neil perform.

Just seeing these people and their, and their talents

what they do, what they excel at

gives you a whole different view of the person.

Maybe it's just a different sense in the house

maybe I just get the feeling that

these people care about me more.

[Mike] 'Fred Astaire of rollerblading, look at him go.'

[Mike] 'Do you want to do?'

Seriously, do you want to do that, your show here?

That'd be the perfect way of..

I don't know, inviting all our friends over

and, um, entertaining them somehow.

I think it would be kind of fun

to have-to have a bunch of friends over here

and to, and to go ahead and do it.

'Cause I've never really done something really that casual

especially, certainly with my play

it's never been that type of casual thing

but I think it'd be a fun night

an interesting night for everybody.

Have to figure out how many seats we got.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven.

We bring that couch here.

Couch upstairs is three.

This is coming down, right?

The big chair in my room

the big chair in Sharon's room.

So what are we at now, Jay?

Seating for .

Everyone's excited about it, it's gonna be a big party

and, uh, and we're gonna get to see a play.

We're gonna see Jay doing what he loves to do.

I had a bed right here like this.

And then I had a desk on a stage like this.

'There's two sound cues in the play.'

If you wanted to be the sound guy..

I was gonna say, I can just stand up there

and if you, like, tell me in advance.

Yeah.

Hey, Sharon, would you be interested in running

um, the light board during, during my play?

Oh, I would love to, yeah!

It's not that you'd know where the cues are

it's just that you know what the play's about.

So, we'll have you on the lights and Lars on the sound.

I'll be up there acting.

At first I was like, "Oh, yeah, absolutely, I'll do it!"

And then, like, about an hour later I was thinking

"Oh, my God, what if I...screw up?"

'Cause it's quite a responsibility.

[Mike] 'Sharon's doing what for you?'

[Jay] 'Lights. Running this light board.'

Do you have any light changes, or is she just running them?

I mean, like, turn 'em on when you start

turn 'em off when you're done.

'What, you think Sharon can't run a light board?'

I think Sharon has trouble

turning off the lights in her own room.

I told Mike that Sharon was gonna be doing my lighting

and I think Mike lost all respect for me.

It's really not complicated.

I'll put it this way, if I gave somebody that sheet of paper

that I gave Sharon yesterday

ten minutes before my show started

'I-I'd feel confident doing it.'

[Lars] 'But now that Sharon's doing it'

'you think you need a two-hour rehearsal?'

It's a first, so I hope I don't mess up.

These blue asterisks..

...they are...when I change the lights.

- Yes? - Hmm.

'They are representing changes in the settings'

'but it doesn't say which settings to change it to.'

Well, that's what this is for.

Oh, I see.

Did you understand? Did you read through this?

I did.

'So, it's not, it's not that difficult.'

Okey-dokey.

[phone dialing]

[Jay] I tried to call my father about times

in the space of two days

because I got a letter from him

giving me his phone number in Saudi Arabia.

[dial tone]

♪ I've been waiting ♪

♪ Seems like eternity ♪

♪ I've been waiting ♪

♪ Waiting for you ♪

♪ I'm still waiting ♪

♪ If you remember me ♪

♪ I'll be waiting ♪

♪ Waiting for you ♪♪

[Jay] It's only two days away and it's kind of overwhelming

'cause there's so many different things

that can happen.

Oh, it's lovely.

There's a good chance

I won't be able to connect with these people.

You know, just, you know, culturally

the differences will be such.

I don't know, I have to look and see

how much of the play I have to change

to suit the audience.

I mean, the sense of humor is different over here

and emotions are different.

It's a complete adventure, it's a complete mystery.

But it's one of those things where if it works

you know, then that's a wonderful thing.

[Sharon] 'Jay!'

Your dad's on the phone from Saudi Arabia for you!

Hello.

[man on phone] 'Hi, there.'

Yeah, hi.

'I'm sorry to wake you up, but..'

No, no, please, no.

For, I mean, for crying out loud, but..

The connection wasn't very good

so it's kind of hard to communicate

but he sounded good.

Hopefully, I'll get to see him right before I go home

which would be perfect.

I'd like to spend a couple days in London.

- It'd be really nice. - 'That would be perfect.'

Okay, well, I'll talk to you on Thursday then.

This play has made an entire change

in my relationship with my father

'cause he came and saw the play.

- 'Okay?' - Alright, I love you, goodbye.

'Alright, love you too. Go back to bed.'

Alright, bye-bye.

At the end of the play, the one-man show

um, it's just the kid dealing with the fact

that his father's not around.

'Cause he knew that the play was autobiographical

and I think he really respected how I handled it.

Finally we went out, played golf

and talked about it for the first time.

That was just.. This was just after seeing my show.

And it's so funny to me to think all this happened

just 'cause I-there was a poster in my drama room

all about entering into this contest.

And, uh, in the back of my mind I've always wondered

what would've happened if, you know, if Bruce

wouldn't have put that poster up or

it wouldn't have a category for playwriting, you know?

You can't say, "What would I do if"

if that path didn't come your way.

'I was , , it was kind of'

either you go to art school or go to Oxford University.

I choose Oxford, and I'll never know

what would've happened had I gone to art school.

You can't think about what would've happened if.

It doesn't do you any favors.

Out of everybody in the house

I'm looking forward to seeing Neil's

reaction the most.

Neil and I are both performers

and both spend a lot of time observing life

observing what's around us.

You're gonna grow out of the part.

I get all these different ideas of how the character should work

or how he'd say things, and it's real..

That's like my challenge, is to try to keep it

like a -year-old.

Well, now it looks like what it really is, a set, doesn't it?

- Lovely. - Keep it comin'.

[glass breaks]

I'm just trying to figure out how to put the posters

'and have them look nice.'

[Mike] 'I think it should go low at, like, light level.'

I don't think so.

Maybe it's just straight down then.

What I was thinking, "Blues Traveler"

and Fred Astaire down here.

You're the director, I'm the house manager.

I think that looks much better.

What do you think of this poster configuration, Mike?

Every time you ask for any of my opinions

you say, "What do you think of this?"

I say, "Do it like that," you say

"Well, yeah, that's an idea."

What's that, Jay?

[Jay] 'Oh, that's Mike's contribution.'

[Mike] Oh, bull * * *. You picked it, you said put that up.

He had it, like, right here and with the spotlight

the angle of the spotlight went poof like that.

I think it looks beautiful.

Feels like I got a job again, almost.

I was just gonna say like, your whole demeanor's different.

[Mike] 'Let's get the party started.'

[Sharon] 'God, they're impressive.'

[Jay] 'It's great, yeah.'

This is as simple as pie.

- You ready? - Mm-hmm.

Alright, basically, here's nothing again

'here's just the spotlight.'

There's so many thingies going on

I'm not sure which is controlling what.

Okay, all we're, all we're controlling..

'This is the first set.'

'Okay, pretty soon, there comes a cue'

'where you're gonna cut the stage lights'

'and have just the spotlight.'

I hope I don't just lose my head

'cause I'm so busy watching it like everybody else..

Yeah, that's the one thing

to be honest, Sharon, that worries me.

[Sharon] 'I will not forget my slow fade-out.'

'Oh, no, you can depend on me.'

[Jay] 'No-no-no-no-no-no.'

I know, I know, I know, sorry.

♪ It's enough enough enough ♪♪

[instrumental music]

Woo-hoo, baby!

I was thinking of wearing this to the party.

[Mike] 'Oh, yeah!'

Why are you even wearing the T-shirt?

'Get rid of the T-shirt, wear a wonder bra.'

'Get rid of that T-shirt, man.'

'Yeah, there you go.'

[screaming]

Kat, where are all the plastic cups?

Oh, now you're wearing a shirt.

Yeah, you think I should take the shirt off?

If you're gonna do it, don't do it half-assed.

That's what I say.

How does it sound down there?

No, Kat, where are the drink glasses?

These are for shots!

[Jay] 'During that monologue, you can just go ahead'

and leave the blues up.

- Okay. - So you're ready?

Totally, yeah.

I'm totally competent, I know what I'm doing.

I just hope it works out.

[indistinct chattering]

Oh, come on in, grab a seat, people are just arriving.

You did?

[Kat] Jay's been trying to have a quiet moment all day.

Hasn't been working at all.

[Jay] So I was just sitting in that bathroom

I was just trying to remember how I felt

when I first wrote the show.

And I was trying to think

this is, what an incredible opportunity

you know, you sat and wrote this by yourself

and now you got all these people down here

waiting to hear it, you know, waiting to be entertained.

Nobody's told me how to do it

and it's one of the few points in my life

where I can just say, "This is me, I'm just myself."

The two hours that I spend performing it

it's something that I cherish.

[Jacinda] 'Get ready to start, everybody!'

[instrumental music]

Ladies and gentlemen

welcome on to the gala premiere

of my one-man show..

The story of my play is basically about a kid

who can't fall asleep

so he gets up and he decides to just act

you know, perform monologues.

My grandmother gave me this recorder

on my th birthday, uh..

with the orders that I record all the good ideas

that come to me at night.

"You're just becoming a man now," she said.

"It's not too late for you to have somegood ideas."

It's a fictional autobiography.

It's like I went through my life and told the stories

and then tweaked the things to make them theatrical

or to make my life seem interesting or funny.

I got a job working for the Portland Beavers.

I was .

'I sat down with the application'

and under references I wrote..

...Dictionary, Thesaurus and World Book Encyclopedia.

[laughing]

Towards the end of my first season

old owner called me into his office.

Sat down and he looked at me

motioned with his head

"You see those, see those baseballs?"

"Fill those up for me, will you?"

The paper was covered

with the autographs of every member

of the Portland Beavers baseball team.

I thought about the girl.

The girl who'd come to her first baseball game

and by some chance would-would go home

with a baseball signed by her heroes.

I sat there, a little kid..

...and thought about how she'd never know the truth.

[Kat] He owns the stage when he comes out there.

He's very much in his element.

As soon as he was on stage, it was his.

Seventeen-year-old males spend the majority

of their waking hours engaged in the pursuit

of three elusive goals.

Sex...freedom..

...and...well, sex.

[laughing]

[Mike] The whole time I was sittin' there

I was just grinnin' and smilin'.

I-I don't know if it was, if it was

the play I thought was so good

or if it was just watching Jay up there, that was so neat.

See, my-my dad always talked about Oregon

'always about some buddy who made it to the coast'

and was making good-good house money

building a garage for some guy's Rolls-Royce's.

[Neil] I think it was Jay times three.

He was a, more of a expressive character

than he is in everyday life.

And that was nice, he came out of himself.

I broke down the court and pulled up

about the top of the key

left the ground for a jump shot

and, uh, I heard the first shots.

My eyes stayed focused on the rim, two points.

'My partners and I just dropped to the concrete..'

...I would've got hit.

I stayed on the ground, fist clenchin'.

I heard sirens, and I was-I was-I was runnin'.

Runnin'.

Cars streamin' this way, screamin', screamin'.

Sirens, me just runnin'.

Runnin', runnin'.

About the middle of the bridge

I guess the sirens sort of faded

and, uh...I stopped.

'See, there was a little yellow sign with a green flower'

on the middle of the bridge, "Suicide Prevention Hotline."

I said...uh..

I had never thought of suicide until I saw that sign.

[phone ringing]

Hello, yeah?

Who's this?

[Jay] He's in the middle of telling these stories

and he gets interrupted by a phone call.

It's mysterious, nobody knows who the caller is

but it upsets him.

The thing about being seventeen

is that you find yourself coming to a point

where you, you stand up and look.

Really look at what's around you.

The world and at yourself.

Some of us grab a ., some-some run with a g*ng

others hide behind their homework.

Me? I just can't get to sleep.

Towards the end of the play the fantasy wears down

and he stops performing for this made up audience

and in the end, comes to some moments of truth.

[Jay on recorder] 'Ladies and gentlemen'

'welcome to the gala premiere..'

[tape forwarding]

'...too late for you to have some good ideas.'

[tape forwarding]

'Hello, yeah, who is this?'

[man on tape] 'This is your father.'

The effect that the father has on the kid in the play

really does mirror how my father

has affected my own life.

Then at the end, the statement I try to make

is just that it's been his father all along.

[sobbing] I need some sleep.

That's the underlying thing.

That's why he's up here performing.

That's why he feels homeless.

That's why it's too much for him to take at-at the end.

[applause]

The thing I-I love most about performing the play

is right afterwards some of the reactions

I get are really amazing for me to see.

Oh, that was amazing.

I just won't ever forget, like, Jacinda and Kat come up to me

and you could just see tears in their eyes and stuff.

- It was very impressive. - Thank you, bro.

The sound was right on, G.

Lars was even crying almost.

- You did so well! - Thank you.

- I am so proud of you. - You did a good job too.

She did perform admirably, she came through for me.

I'm sure I would've heard a great deal about it

if she'd done something horrible.

That was fantastic, man, that was great.

- I really enjoyed it. - Did you like it?

Some of it I liked a lot.

He's an Englishman, you gotta remember

he's a man of few words.

I know, that's why they mean something.

Swear to God, I've like, been telling everybody

I'm like, I'm gonna take my kids to your movie

and go, "He might not remember me now, son

but I'll never forget him."

And I'm gonna take 'em home afterwards

and up above the mantle I'm gonna have the program.

Still can't get any women.

Still gonna go to bed alone with Mike tonight.

It was brilliant, brilliant.

'It really was, I'm speechless.'

- I'm not good at this. - Okay.

I really suck at this.

The end of the show is so strange because I'm so drained

and I, so, it's like, I don't know what to think.

Just like Kandinsky, he painted music

I think you can paint theater.

[dance music]

Jacinda's in there.

I'm going to the shop to get something to eat

and then I'm gonna get a big ol' thing of pop

and have a good night.

Okay. Right you go.

[Jay] I don't feel, like, this pressure inside

to be this prolific playwright

and I'm happy just performing and if, you know

it comes around where I-I get another idea

or I feel like there's another play there

or I can do something good, then-then that'll be it.

[female narrator] On the next "Real World.."

As parties go, it was quite odd.

[muffled singing]

[Kat] Mike was so cute, he was all over everybody.

The only person I'd consider hooking up with was Hanna.

- What'd be frequent for you? - Five times a night.

Sebastian has a motorcycle. I love motorcycles.

[laughing]

It did take me a while to get into it.

I mean, I had two things to deal with.

I had to think about being , and I had to think about

being an American -year-old.

There were bits in it that really got to me.

Good.

It's an astounding piece of work for a -year-old.

Yeah, as long as people went away feeling okay

that they gave me their attention for two hours.

If you can turn my friends around and they got into it

then you're doing very well.

They've the most cynical bunch of * * *

that you're ever gonna have to play to.

'There's stuff that's going on now'

'that will never happen to you again.'

So get your pen out, Jay.

Get your piece of paper out and write down.

[Jay] Neil thinks I should be writing this down.

That'll be the first thing I write.