03x06 - Assist

[bunniefuu]

She really is a moron.

Even I can tell
she's truly in love with him.

I can't believe Kohei
of all people found out.

Do you have a thing for Kitahara?

But I don't think he knows for sure yet.

I have to play dumb and get through this!

Morning.

- Good morning.

- Good morning.

Morning.

Chisa and I are on breakfast duty today?

Yeah. What should we make?

We have some leftover spam.

Wait, Kitahara.

Huh?

Let me take over breakfast today.

What brought this on?

Just felt like it.
Let's do this, Kotegawa.

What's with him?

This morning, we've gotta move gear,
update the blog, and sort receipts.

Who should do what?

The blog and receipts can be
done indoors, where it's cool.

We settle it with RPS, then.

I'll bring in the gear.

Huh?

It's hot outside, y'know?

I don't mind.
I'm in the mood for some sun.

Right. I'll be focusing on the work.

I won't be back for at least
two hours, got it?

Does he have a fever or something?

Sorry, Cakey. Can you pass me the tea?

Sure.

I'll pour it.

Cheers.

Get a room, you two.

Excuse me, what?

You two were just acting
like some old married couple.

All she did was pour me some tea?

At this point, you might as well...

make it official and start dating!

God, you suck at this!

What was that for?

Do you really have to ask?
What the heck do you think you're doing?!

What's it look like I'm doing?

Oh, so you're trying to mess with me.

Where'd you get that idea?

Even if you were right, which you aren't,

and I was in love...

You weren't helping at all
pulling that weird crap!

Get it now?

Yeah, I understand.

You're a tsundere, yeah?

Somebody throw this moron off a cliff!

What do I do? I tried my best to deny it.

You really do have the wrong idea about
that thing you asked me last night!

Wait, maybe I tried too hard
and made him suspicious.

He might just lose interest
if I leave him be.

Fine, do what you want.

Got it.

Leave everything to me.

I don't trust him one bit.

Say, Kithara.

What's up?

Are you interested in love fortunes?

Huh?

Why're you bringing up that creepy crap?

Big fan, huh? Oh, you shy,
pure little boy.

Listen to me, jackass.

I'll do you a solid and read your fortune.

Sure, whatever.

Pick a card, any card.

Okay.

What'd you draw?

A three of diamonds.

Great. I see it all now.

From one card? Really?

Since you drew a three of diamonds,

you know a country girl your age who
gets caked up and loves cliched romance!

She's the one for you.

How specific can you get?!

No more fortune telling!

Roger that.

Say, Kitahara.

What now?

Wanna try a personality test?

Wha?

Is that all you've got?!

What are you up to?

I just want to know how you truly feel.

Stop it. You're creeping me out.

Okay, here we go.

Yeesh, fine.

He's actually playing along?

You've been invited to
a dinner party hosted by your boss.

Among the lavish spread,
you spot a dish you cannot stand.

What do you do? That's the dilemma.

Hmm, a dish I hate?

What about you, Cakey?

I'm playing too?

I think I'd suck it up and eat it anyway.

I see.

So, this question reveals what kind of
personality you're compatible with.

Huh?

In your case, someone who's easy-going
yet surprisingly thoughtful.

Now you, Kitahara?

The thing is...

I'm not a picky eater, so the whole
situation feels alien to me.

Too bad. This test doesn't apply to me.

I see. That means...

You have the tolerance to accept
a bizarre-looking girl with lotsa makeup.

What if I said I'd turn the food down?

You have the heart to accept
a bizarre-looking girl with lotsa makeup.

What if I tried it
but couldn't stomach it?

You have the courage to attempt
a bizarre-looking girl with lotsa makeup.

If I dropped it on purpose?

You have the smarts to...

Huddle up, Kohei!

Yes, ma'am.

Give it a rest already!

But you told me to do what I want.

The fact he's just trying to help
makes it even worse!

Listen here...

What?

Let's just say! Hypothetically speaking!

I l-l-like Iori, okay?

Yeah?

Why are you trying so hard to set us up?

There's nothing in it for you.

Kohei?

Yeah, why am I doing this?

Wha?

You're absolutely right.
Why am I wasting my time?

What the heck?
You didn't even know yourself?

Well, if I had to say...

I know what it feels like to have
a fascination completely overwhelm you.

You mean...

You like someone too?

Yes. I'm sorry I kept it
a secret from you,

but I used to be a huge otaku
with a burning passion for anime!

Oh, right. Gotcha.

Anyway, I've got your back.

There's no telling what he'll do
if I leave him to his own devices.

I might as well take the reins.

Okay. Subtly go pick his brain for me.

Sure. What should I ask him?

What are those two plotting?

Hello, this is Dolphin.

Hello, this is Sugita
with Worldwide Tours.

Is Kotegawa-sama available?

One moment, please.

Auntie, you've got a call.

Hello, auntie? Phone call?

Hey, boss!

Hm? What's up?

Phone for you.

Hello?

She must not want me to call her auntie.

Hey, Kitahara.

Kohei?

What now?

I have a question for you.

I dunno, ask him if he sees me as a woman.

Got it. I'll ask him subtly.

Tell me...

Do you wanna fug Cakey?

Ow! Ouch!

What in the hell are they trying to do?

Hope you had a great time!

You guys can really drink.

Thanks for today, Aina-chan.

Thank you too!

Thanks for the BBQ, too.

Let's meet up for drinks back in Japan.

Good night!

Those customers really
took a liking to you, Aina.

You had quite a few drinks with them.
How are you holding up?

Oh, that was nothing. I'm fine.

We'll go pack up the grill and stuff.

Please do.

Those guys really settled into the job.

They sure have. They've been
here for what, ten days now?

Should be around that, yeah.

Two boys and two girls
living together for ten days?

I wonder what those two
do about you-know-what.

Come on now.

I mean, guys straight up die
if they hold it in for two weeks.

Yeah, yeah. Their ba*ls explode
and they bleed to death.

When do they have
the time to sh**t it out?

They're young and horny. Must be hard.

For real?!

The chief told me what happened today.

You noticed a male customer's band
was loose and tried to fix it?

And you clamped down
on the jewels as you did it?

I wasn't thinking.

I didn't tie it that tight, though.

There's a reason a man's family
jewels are his greatest weakness.

How'd you grow up to be so thoughtless?

I'm sorry.

Nanaka's as clueless as they come,
and even she gets by just fine.

You might want to study up on men
outside of what they taught you in school.

Chisa! Chisa!

What's wrong?

I think we have an emergency.

Did something happen with the customers?

No, not them!

Iori and Kohei might die!

What happened while you
saw the customers off?!

Did they get into an accident?

No, nothing like that!

They're going to die from exploding ba*ls!

Okay, now I'm really lost!

Tell me more, anyway.

I'm not an expert on guys,

but I heard that if they hold mumble
mumble in for two weeks, they die.

What?

That's stupid.

I think so, too.

But... But just think about
how they always act.

"How they always act"?

Like how they do stuff
us girls just don't get!

You might be onto something.

I always thought I'd never
understand what drives them,

but what if all that was because...

their lives depend on it?

That'd explain everything, right?

But they were just fine in Okinawa.

That was only a five-night trip.
Also, when Iori was stuck in bed...

I suggested to Iori that we have sex.

I think she was trying to treat him.

That's what it was?!

But I've never heard of
anyone dying that way.

Me neither!

But what if it happens,
and we just don't know?

You might want to study up on men
outside of what they taught you in school.

We should check.

Check what?

How the guys are doing.

Great work, guys.

Are you done...

You okay, Kohei? How bad is it?

Sorry. Could you rub my back a little?

Sure.

Take it easy, dude.

It was true!

I can't believe it.

But Iori was seriously
worried about Kohei!

Normally, he'd just
point and laugh at him!

True.

Guys have delicate bodies, huh?

Yeah, I had no idea.

Shouldn't they have seen this coming?

Yeah, it's weird that
they didn't prepare...

What's up?

Actually, I think they tried to.

No way... it got confiscated?

Well, they weren't things
you should have out in public.

You said the time limit
was two weeks, right?

Yeah, that's what I heard.

That means they...

...only have three days left.

You okay?

Yeah, somehow.

I feel your pain, bro.

What was that pole doing there?

Anyway, that takes care of
most of today's work.

Time for some fun beer time.

Why?

Why are they looking at us
with such pity in their eyes?!

They're looking at us like we're
pathetic dead men walking!

Iori...

Kohei...

Thanks for everything.

What the hell?!

Why the sudden gratitude?!

What's gotten into you two?!

Don't worry about it.

We have nothing else to offer.

Just showing love that you're
with us now. Nothing but love.

What are you, a rapper?

You guys wanted beer, right?

It's on us tonight.

We'll handle the rest of the cleanup.

You go ahead and get started, okay?

O-Okay.

Something's wrong.

Agreed.

I know I gave them lots of
reasons to be mad...

...but nothing to make them
feel sorry for us.

And is it just me, or were
they talking to our junk?

Our junk?

What's up?

Junk, pity, a foreign country.

No way!

You realized it too?

They were probably
comparing ours to the locals.

Damn it!

Is that really it, though?

Beats me.

Let's verify, then.

Verify how?

Picture Cakey drunk and half-naked,
sitting between Azusa-san and Nanaka-san.

That's it! That's the look!

So that look was them comparing sizes.

I'm 80 percent sure that was the case.

Man, reality is so cruel.

You said it. 3D can go to hell.

I mean, not much we can do
about that. We're outmatched.

As much as that look
irks me, you're right.

Might as well accept their pity
and drink for free.

I'm down for that.

So...

What can we do?

Well, the best way to help would be...

No way.

R-Right!

Is there anything else we can do for them?

Hmm...

Something came up. We won't
be back for another two hours.

Go for it!

What the hell?

Will that do?

Yeah, it should work. Not that I'd know.

You two are still here?
The owner and chief are about to leave.

Maki-san.

We have our reasons.

We want to k*ll time for about two hours.

Huh...

Can you two lock up for me, then?

Thank you very much.

Remember to bring the keys back tomorrow.

Right.

Wait, why do you have
to k*ll two hours, anyway?

Well, uh...

We wanted to give Iori and Kohei
some alone time?

Huh?

It always says two hours
for "rest" on hotel signs!

Wait, you mean those two are... What?

Yeah, so you know...

We're gonna let them
have the house for a bit.

I-I see...

Those two are like that?

Good night!

Night!

Another hour to go.

Any ideas?

Want to watch a diving DVD?

They're not as exciting as the real thing.

Well, I like both.

You really are all about diving, huh?

Am I?

You are.

I kinda envy you.

Why?

Because you have something
you're so passionate about.

Is that how it works?

Yeah.

I really envy you.

People can be so cool when they
get laser-focused on one thing!

You wanna become
a diving instructor, right?

Yeah.

Why are you majoring
in engineering, then?

Chisa?

Oh, sorry! Was that a touchy subject?

Nah, nothing like that.

I've always been good at math
and science, but mostly...

because I got into a fight with my mom.

So we cut a deal, basically.

Yeah?

She doesn't like the idea of me
becoming an instructor.

I see.

You see...

I wish I were like my sister.

You wish you were born first?

That's part of it,

but she's friendly,
cheerful, loves the ocean,

and she's great at her job, too.

I feel like life would be so much better
if we'd switched places.

You want to be someone else, huh?

If I say this,

I know it'll just make me sound pathetic.

I wish I could be you, Chisa.

Me?

Uh, I just mean...

I wish I were like you, too.

Huh?

Why? There's nothing good about me.

You got along great with
today's group of customers.

I don't have the people skills for that.

Chisa...

No use moaning about what we can't change.

The grass is always greener
on the other side.

Ultimately, I'm always just gonna be me.

Enjoying yourselves, ladies?

I-Iori? And Imamura-kun?

Why are you mad?

Don't gimme that sh*t.

We caught Maki-san peeking through
the window and asked her why...

Why'd you tell her
I was dating this loser?!

Say what?!

We were just trying to be
considerate of your situation...

In what situation
would I be pounding his a*s?!

If this is a prank, it ain't funny!

So there you have it.

The Iori and Kohei thing
was a big misunderstanding.

Oh, I see. My bad.

Not at all.

My fault for taking the joke seriously.

But seriously, Iori and Kohei?
Never happening.

Right, you two?

Me?!

Say something!

Wait, is it true?!

Is it?

Hell no!

That's slander!

That band accident yesterday
really bothered you, huh?

I'm sorry.

Loosen up some, okay?

I don't know how you expect to work
in customer service like that.

It's okay, Chisa.

The boss just isn't good with words.

Right.