10x16 - Nervous Romance

[bunniefuu]

♪ Sunday, Monday, happy days ♪

♪ Tuesday, Wednesday, happy days ♪

♪ Thursday, Friday, happy days ♪

♪ The weekend comes, my cycle hums ♪

♪ Ready to race to you ♪

♪ These days are ours ♪

- ♪ Happy and free ♪
- ♪ Oh, happy days ♪

♪ These days are ours ♪

- ♪ Share them with me ♪
- ♪ Oh, baby ♪

♪ Good-bye, gray sky, hello, blue ♪

♪ There's nothing can hold me when I hold you ♪

♪ It feels so right it can't be wrong ♪

♪ Rocking and rolling all week long ♪

[organ solo plays over rhythmic hand claps]

♪ Sunday, Monday, happy days ♪

♪ Tuesday, Wednesday, happy days ♪

♪ Thursday, Friday, happy days ♪

♪ Saturday, what a day ♪

♪ Groovin' all week with you ♪

♪ These days are ours ♪

- ♪ Share them with me ♪
- ♪ Oh, happy days ♪

♪ These days are ours ♪

- ♪ Happy and free ♪
- ♪ Oh, baby ♪

♪ These happy days are yours and mine ♪

♪ These happy days are yours ♪

♪ And mine, Happy Days! ♪

Surprise!

Happy anniversary!

Come on!

Wait a minute, wait a minute, I did not
know that it was your anniversary,

I didn't bring no presents.

No, no, no, it's your anniversary, Arthur, you
and Ashley had your first date six months ago.

My anniversary, where are my presents?

Marion, Howard, this is just wonderful.

Yeah, wonderful, wonderful.

Well, Howard and I just love to celebrate important events.

You know, when Richie was in Little League
and he got his first home run,

we had this cake shaped just like a
baseball diamond, and all the little men.

And then one of them was Richie, and
we used a maraschino cherry for his cake.

You know, because Richie's red-haired.

Keep telling the story, Marion.

My eyelashes are on fire.

All right, come on, let's go blow out the candles.

Go ahead.

All right.

That's great, that's great.

You know, come to think about it, I have
never had an anniversary before, you know.

Well, actually, this isn't an anniversary, which
comes from the Latin, root word, Ana, meaning year.

You see that?

That's why you're alone.

Six months.

To tell you the truth, I never thought we
were going to make it through our first date.

I'm surprised he made it to your first date.

You should have seen Fonz.

He was a nervous wreck.

Really?

I never heard this.

Me neither.

Thank you very much, Roger.

All right, I might have been a little bit
nervous, you know.

Don't let him get you.

Fonz was a basket case.

Well, maybe we could go out for just a
little dinner, Friday.

Yeah, just a little one.

No hors d'oeuvres.

See you Friday.

It would be my pleasure, Miss Pfister.

Fonz, look, Fonz, we know you're down in the
dumps because Ashley won't go out with you.

So we came here to cheer you up.

No, no, you got it wrong.

Forget your pride, Fonz.

She's not worth it.

She's stuck up.

She's boring.

She's an old dish rag.

Oh, yeah?

She's going out with me.

She's beautiful.

She's charming.

She's the luckiest girl in the world.

Stop me when I'm safe.

Because I love you, I'm going to play this game with you.

Hide and seek.

You go in the bedroom.

We're going to look for you.

Okay, count to 25 slow.

You got it.

One.

Up you ride.

Oh, boy.

Two.

I can't believe you actually pulled this off.

You actually turned her around.

That's amazing.

That's amazing.

What's the matter with your hands?

Well, nothing.

My palms are a little wet.

Oh, sweaty palms.

Fonz, you're nervous.

Are you crazy?

Come here.

What do I have to be nervous about?

Nothing, Fonz.

It's exactly right.

It's a first date.

In our society, this provides one with the
opportunity to go out and get acquainted

and see if there really is anything worth pursuing.

Yeah.

Yeah.

What do you know about it?

Are you kidding, Fonz?

I have lots of dates.

Hey, last week I had this date.

We're talking about my life here.

This is Fonzie day.

I'm sorry.

You're right.

You're not even warm.

I can't blow it because if I blow it, she'll
probably never go out with me again.

You understand?

Yeah.

Fonz?

Yeah?

My lapels are still damp.

The wrinkles will set.

Hey, Fonz, I have never seen you get so
worked up over a date before.

See, then it's starting again.

Oh, look, I have put all my manifold power into this.

It's got to be a perfect date in a perfect place.

All right, I've got it.

Thanks.

You take her to a posh little restaurant
that'll impress her.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's probably a lot better than having her
cook dinner for me.

Much.

See, this is all working out.

My first thought was like going to a mobile home show.

Now, that explains why Arthur was so nervous.

You know, that reminds me of the time that
Marion and I first started dating.

I'll never forget.

We got... Howard.

Not now, dear.

You told a story about Richie's cherry hat.

Howard, now, you can tell your story when
it's our anniversary, when they have to be polite.

Where were you?

Arthur was all nutso.

If you think he was crazy, you should have seen my mom.

Oh, yeah?

Through my ears, with the detail.

Oh, he just doesn't always exaggerate.

Uh-huh.

Well, I admit that by the time Friday night rolled
around, I might have had just a mild case of the jitters.

A mild case?

She fed my goldfish parmesan cheese.

Oh, Heather, you chose a great time for
your finger painting.

But it's my homework.

Oh, yes, sweetheart.

Well, it's a lovely tree.

It's not a tree.

It's President Lincoln.

Oh, yes, yes, of course it is.

Now, Heather, do me a favor and tell me
which dress you prefer.

This one or this one?

Hmm, I like this one.

Oh, so did I.

Well, that one's pretty, too.

Oh, now I have to find my gray shoes.

Mommy, are you going to marry this guy, Fonzie?

Don't be silly.

How would I know that?

You don't know.

Why are you going out with him?

Oh, well, Heather, you ask too many questions.

Oh, can you get that?

Yes, Mommy.

Hello?

Okay, Mrs. Burton, I will.

Who was that?

It was Mrs. Burton.

Oh, the babysitter.

What did she want?

She wanted to know if I gave you her message.

From when she called the first time.

What message was that, sweetie?

That she can't babysit with me tonight.

Oh, Heather, you're kidding.

Why didn't you tell me that before?

I was involved in my art.

Heather, no babysitter.

I'll paint on my favorite dress.

What next?

He's here.

Perfect timing.

Oh, my stomach.

Oh, Heather, you answered the door.

Okay.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

So, uh, how are you?

I'm fine.

Great.

Is your mother ready?

Are you kidding?

Well, I bought you a present.

This one's for you.

Wow, it's dark.

Can you take Mommy out every night?

I like your attitude.

I've got to go to work.

Thanks.

Oh, excuse me.

You're certainly more beautiful than
Katharine Hepburn and the African queen.

Thank you.

I think.

I, uh, I got you a present here.

Here it is.

Oh, it's lovely.

It's just beautiful.

It's... Thanks.

Plastic?

Yeah.

Yeah.

See, that's the beauty of it.

See?

Right after a day, you can take it off,
and then you can wash it.

You put it under the faucet, and you rinse it off.

See?

You can use it over and over and over again.

And, uh, you can use it, I'm sorry.

Uh, Fonzie, there's a little problem.

My babysitter fell through.

Uh, maybe we should do this some other time.

No.

Uh, I mean, we can't do this another time
because I can't go through this another week.

Let's, uh, let's take Heather with us.

Yeah, I never get to go anywhere.

Mommy, please take me, please.

Please.

Uh, okay.

Great.

Okay.

Well, we'll just go wash around.

Yeah, we got an 8 O'clock reservation to
shake a tail feather right there.

Is she beautiful?

Is she charming?

Is she an artist?

Oh, yeah, Abraham Lincoln.

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We're making something.

The new Honey Bunch of the Oats with peaches.

And bananas.

So we're spreading the word.

Wow, real peaches.

Honey, oak clusters, flakes.

And bananas.

New Honey Bunch of the Oats with peaches.

And bananas.

So, um, Fonzie kind of gave us the name of a restaurant.

What was it?

We went Quail and Snail.

Do you believe that people pay to eat snails?

Welcome to Quail and Snail.

A touch of Paris on your plate.

Do you have a reservation?

I got a reservation.

Of course I got a reservation.

Fonzarelli's down there somewhere.

Well, there must be some mistake.

Your reservation is for two, and there are
clearly three of you.

Yeah, two adults and a kid, so what?

So you'll wait.

I know how to take care of this kind of guy.

I am sure that you can find us something.

You've waited long enough.

Follow me.

Absolutely.

Thank you.

You there, young person, do not touch my petty fours.

Come, I'll show you to one of our better tables.

Walk this way.

No thanks, I've been walking this way for
a long, long time.

There you go, get right up there.

Thank you.

My pleasure, Heather.

What a delightful young lady.

This is a lovely restaurant.

Do you come here often?

Oh, yes.

I eat here continually.

It's going to be tough for me to decide what I want.

Why is that, honey?

Because I can't read.

Bonsoir.

I am shocked you're waiting for us this evening.

Would you like the booster chow?

No, thanks, I'm fine.

May I take your order, madame?

Oui, très bien.

Moi, je vous en prie.

Je prendrai les croustes de granouille
pour Elle, le pet it steak au point.

Is she fluent or what?

Hey, look, I'm not Jacques.

My name's Jack.

I'm just trying to work my way through college.

I don't even speak French.

Please, order in English.

Oh, yeah, of course.

I'll have the frog's legs.

This is not one of them places where you
gotta pick your own frog, is it?

And she'll just take the chopped steak.

My turn.

All right, I'll have...

this right here.

Excellent choice.

Look at that, I made an excellent choice, huh?

Yeah, thanks a lot, Jack.

So, here we are.

I think we should start off by getting
acquainted with one another.

Well, I'm in the first grade.

I like chocolate ice cream, and I know how
to spell banana, but I don't know when to stop.

Well, we have got stuff in common here.

You know, when I take an order down at Arnold's for
banana splits, I spell it banana-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na.

So, what school do you go to?

I go to Ridgemont.

I do, too.

Hey, is Mrs. Seymour still there?

Yeah, she has a yucky breath.

Heather.

No, no, she does.

I mean, she did.

She always will.

Where'd you go to school, Ashley?

Switzerland.

What a long bus ride.

Great picture.

Oh, yes.

Do you like French Impressionists?

You know, I do.

Especially ones that do Ed Sullivan.

He's my favorite.

Me, too.

Now, what would French Impressionists be
without Ed Sullivan?

I have said that.

Starting again.

Here you go.

Fonzie, young lady.

Mmmmmmmmm.

Frog legs.

Steak tartare.

Bon appétit.

This is blood raw.

The chef said it's always served that way.

I don't care what the chef says.

This is raw meat.

I'll tell the chef to cook it.

I thought the chef.

I would know that by now.

You know, this is not the first time this happened to me.

Once in a Japanese restaurant, it happened with fish.

Mommy, that man's cigar is making me sick.

Oh, no, no, I'll take care of it.

I got a certain charm with people, you know?

Good.

Excuse me, sir, but your cigar smoke is
bothering this young girl here.

Could you put it out, please?

Could you put your face out?

It's bothering me.

Uh, Fonzie, maybe we could find another table.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

We're not moving to another table.

We're staying right here.

We're having a lovely evening.

I asked you once very nicely.

I'm going to ask you one more time, please.

Put your cigar out.

Buzz off.

How are you?

Great, I didn't see you.

Thank you.

It's a $2 cigar.

And it goes very well with your $3 suit.

Yeah.

Where were we?

So, uh, is, uh, is old man Fetterman
still, uh, still there?

The principal?

He's in jail.

I saw that coming.

I'm going to have to be a little more, uh, this time.

Fonzie, please don't make a scene.

How you doing?

What do you want, please, Paul?

Not much, not much.

Uh, madam, madam, when you're in there,
check my steak, will you?

Yo, I shall have to ask her to leave the
restaurant immediately.

Oh, no, you can't do that to me.

Look, I just came in here, I'm with my
girl, I'm trying to impress her.

You failed.

Uh, Fonzie, it's been a lovely evening, but I
think maybe you should just take us home.

No, no, no, please, please, let's not,
let's not give up yet, all right?

Just sit down, eat your fries.

Well, it's getting very late, and I think
we're both very tired.

Mommy, I'm hungry.

You see, that sweetie pie is hungry.

I got another place, all right?

One more place.

Uh, all right, but then we're going directly home.

Absolutely.

Yeah.

I hope this place is good, because you're blowing it.

Hey, just one more second, I'll be out with some real eats.

All right, here we go, huh?

Three steak tartars on a bun and cooked.

I like this place.

Mommy, how come you said it was a dive?

You think this place is a dive?

I give up.

All I wanted was that, you know,
we go out together tonight, and then we

have a good time, you get to know me as a guy, and you'd
say, yes, I'd like to spend the rest of my life with him.

Oh, that's not too much to expect for one evening.

That's what I say.

Oh, Mommy, this bun has seeds.

I can't even get the right buns.

No, no, no, it's all right, go ahead and say
it, this is the worst night of your whole life.

No, no, no, no, it's not the worst night.

No, no, no, go ahead and say it, it's all right.

Very close.

Look at that, I can't even give you the best worst evening.

You were really funny when you dumped that
bucket on top of that man's head.

Oh, Heather's not polite to laugh.

You like that?

Well, you have to admit, it's pretty
amusing to see a man fly across a restaurant.

It is.

And into the kitchen.

With me, you could have that every night.

Well, I mean, the man really deserved it.

I can't tell you how many times I wanted to grab a
man's smelly cigar and stuff it into his wine glass.

Why don't you do it?

Oh, it's not something you do to your father.

Yeah, I guess I draw the line there, too.

It may have gotten just a little bit messy,
but I can't say it wasn't very exciting.

It was sort of like being out with the Cisco kid.

You like the Cisco kid?

Yeah.

We watch him every Saturday morning.

Oh, Cisco!

Oh, Poncho!

You know something, Mr. Fonzarelli?

You are a very surprising man.

Be quiet in here.

When you just give love And never get love
Mr. Pfister, may I have this dance?

Enchanté, excuse me, ma'am.

Excuse.

Me, Heather.

Thanks.

You sit right here, okay?

You're great.

How'd you do that?

I'll tell you on our second date.

Since I fell.

Since I fell for you.

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Hello?

Mrs. Anderson, this is Mark Brown.

I'm from the collections department.

Oh, hi.

Listen, I'm sorry I haven't sent in my payment yet.

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Mrs. Anderson, if I may make a suggestion,
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Since you've reached your spending limit,
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We're just so glad you two finally got together.

You know, otherwise we would have had all
this cake and no reason to eat it.

That was a good one.

That would never happen, Marion.

Actually, I'm very, very glad that this happened to me.

Yes, they do this all the time.

Well, that's quite a story, but I'm afraid it
doesn't quite rival the time that Marion and I.

...

You'd love to hear about it, Howard,
but I think it's Heather's bedtime.

Oh, yeah, well, here we go.

My date.

Okay, it's your loss.

Thanks so much.

What a great night, huh?

Good night, 25.

I see you.

All right.

Let's go.

Settle up.

You.

I tell you, Mr. Seedy, what an evening.

Two of my favorite things.

A little cake, a story about me.

Good night.

Good night.

Good night.

Good night.

Good night.

Drive safely.

You know, Roger, you'll get a kick out of this.

The first time I took you in...
Yeah, maybe later, Uncle Howard.

I gotta go home and look at my calendar,
see if my birthday falls on a weekend this year.

Good night, Roger.

I said, thanks for everything.

It was wonderful.

Lovely evening.

I love you both.

Good night.

Nobody wants to hear our story, Marion.

Howard, it's really not very interesting.

What do you mean it's not interesting?

Don't you remember?

It was raining cats and dogs, and my old
packard got stuck on that muddy country

road, and we had to sleep in the farmer's hayloft.

I never spend a night in a hayloft.

You're right, Marion, it's not a very interesting story.

Just one minute, Howard.

I want names, or you're going to have to
sleep in a hayloft.

Up next,

the Bradys take a trip.

On location in Hawaii, Barry Williams had a real
surfing accident, and Susan Olsen almost drowned.

Coincidence, or not?

Stay tuned.

Stay tuned as Don h* guest stars in a classic three-parter.

These happy days are yours and mine, happy days.