05x22 - Lady in the Air

[bunniefuu]

Good.

Morning, Mr. O'Casey.

Who said?

Your paper was on the front lawn.

Wrote the newspaper a different place every morning.

Well, good morning, Charlie.

Good morning.

Say, I'm going to have to skip breakfast this morning.

I overslept and I'm due out at the airport right about now.

You're working on that round-the-world plane?

Yeah, that's right.

I'm going to meet the pilot for the first time.

Just some toast and coffee so I didn't get up for nothing.

Oh, now, Charley, don't you worry about me.

I won't starve.

There's a cafe open out of the airport.

Show me a man that's cheerful this early in the
morning, and I'll show you a man still in bed sleeping.

I'll see you, Charley.

Pardon me, I'm looking for Trudy Bennett.

Where can I find her?

You just did.

Oh.

You Douglas?

Yes.

Yes, Steve Douglas.

Oh, how do you do?

Hello.

Hello.

So this is the Ladybug, huh?

Yeah.

So far, a great plane for medium-distance flights.

Now, the question is, how can we convert
it to carry enough fuel for a longer hop

on a record-breaking round-the-world flight?

Joe Walters told me if anybody could do it, it'd be you.

Yeah, well, I've read the builder's specifications.

I think it can be done.

Right.

I hope you don't mind working long hours, Douglas.

The weatherman says I have to be airborne on
the 18th, so that doesn't give us too much time.

The 18th, huh?

Yeah.

Well, this is my assignment.

I'll just have to stick with it, that's all.

Thank you.

Mm-hmm.

I know how much a flight like this can mean to a pilot.

I'm glad you said that, Douglas,
because the last engineer I had in my.

Pacific hop had a hard time thinking of me
as anything but a woman.

Oh?

Well, I can understand why you might have
a little difficulty.

That is to the ladybug, huh?

Huh.

Hank, there's a story on Trudy Bennett.

Oh, look at the picture.

Hey, she's something else.

Poor woman, her age.

Jim, can I come in?

Yeah, come in.

Hi.

Hi, Ernie.

Hi, Ernie.

My dad's fixing up that plane for the
lady flag so she can go around the world.

What's she want to do that for?

Who knows?

What are you looking at me for?

My head on backwards or something?

I was wondering if it was you.

It's me.

I mean in the painting.

What painting?

The one in the window of the gallery.

We passed it on the way to the dentist.

Any cavities?

All over the place.

Wait a minute.

What about this painting?

It's your portrait, Mr. O'Casey.

Only it doesn't have your name on it.

Just the title.

The mean old grouch.

Well, that couldn't be me.

Anyway, I never posed for any painting.

Maybe you have a twin brother who was
kidnapped by the gypsies.

The man in the painting was even wearing
the same bathrobe you're wearing right now.

So what?

Lots of men have the same bathrobe.

With the same torn pocket?

I tell you, Steve, it looked just like me.

Well, it must be a coincidence.

You mean somebody else could have a kisser like mine?

Well... What about the bathrobe with the torn pocket?

That's no coincidence.

Well, Charlie, why don't you go in and ask Mr. Eames?

I can't do that.

It would be like Whistler's mother going in
to ask, who's that lady in the rocking chair?

Somehow I gotta find out the name of the
artist so I can felt him one right in the chops.

I'll see you, Charlie.

Well, have a good time.

Well, this is strictly a business dinner.

I can't remember a time when I didn't want to be a pilot.

Hey, did I tell you that my father was a
barnstorming pilot?

No, but I read it in one of your newspaper interviews.

It's a funny thing, but the only time I
can really be myself is when I'm up in the

air, racing, testing new planes, exhibition flying.

If it's got wings, I want to take it up.

I guess a psychiatrist would really make
something out of that one, wouldn't he?

Well, if you break the round-the-world record, you'll
have your name in the books with the best of them.

Yeah.

Perhaps one day I'll wake up and wonder if the whole world
has passed me by while I've been so busy breaking records.

But for now... But for now, we'd better worry
about lighting the ladybug another 200 pounds.

You know, Douglas, maybe we shouldn't have
met for the first time outside of a dirty old hangar.

Maybe we should have met at a c*ck
party near a couple of martinis.

I think it's better this way.

No matter how I redesign an olive,
you'd never get it off the ground.

Now, let's see.

Come on.

Look.

Look.

There it is.

Now, listen, you guys.

Play it cool.

Tell him you're interested in buying the picture.

What with?

I haven't got my allowance yet.

Chip, we're just making believe.

I don't care much for the neorealistic school myself.

Neorealistic?

For Pete's sake.

Come on, come on.

Good afternoon.

Is there something I can do for you?

Well, yes, sir.

We were kind of interested in buying a painting.

A birthday present for his uncle.

Yeah, he doesn't want any more ties.

Which painting did you have in mind?

Well, the one in the window.

The man in the bathrobe taking in the milk bottles.

Oh, the mean old grouch.

I'll get it out.

Just find out who painted it and where I
can get my hands on the picture.

Here we are.

Um, who is he?

Oh, it's a sort of composite of all the
mean old characters in the world.

Potentially not bad.

Well, primitive.

Uh, what about the painter?

Who is he?

Well, to tell you the truth, I don't know.

His wife brought the painting in and
wouldn't leave her name.

She said she didn't want her husband to find out.

He's very retiring.

Didn't even sign the painting.

I thought it, uh, quite interesting.

For a primitive.

So I took it on special consignment.

I'm not sure my uncle would like a picture
called The Mean Old Grouch.

Because he isn't.

Yeah.

How come the artist named it that, anyway?

The artist left it untitled.

Actually, I'm the one who labeled it The Mean Old Grouch.

The Mean Old Grouch.

Just look at those beady little eyes.

Just a minute.

Whose beady little eyes are you calling beady little eyes?

Why, it's you.

Yeah, it sure is.

And you better find out who painted it and
where I can get my hands on them.

And zip it out of your window.

Phew.

What a mean old grouch.

Oh, you should have been up there with me.

What makes you think I wasn't?

Oh, Douglas, you're wonderful.

Since you speed-mind her, she flies like a dream.

Everything checked out, huh?

Everything checked out perfect.

Well, if you're going to fly around the
world, I want to be sure you go first class.

Oh, well, you can take it easy now.

Because day after tomorrow is a big day
and we are in under the water.

Well, I still want to run through another
complete check before you go.

Douglas, relax.

This calls for a celebration.

Come on.

How about dinner time?

Well, I'm sure that you'll have more facts and
figures prepared for dessert, but I'll take you up on it.

Only not at the hotel.

I have been longing for a home-cooked meal.

All right, we'll make it at my house, huh?

I thought you'd never ask.

You can introduce me to my family.

Put the olives in the dish, will you?

All right, Charlie.

I've asked people out here to have dinner before without
giving you much advance notice, and you didn't get so upset.

Well, it just shows you.

You can't take a mean old grouch for granted.

Well, you like Trudy, Charlie.

She's just a plain, everyday girl.

Sure.

Who just happens to be flying around the world solo.

Why didn't you take her for a hamburger or something?

Charlie, this isn't like you.

I know.

It's just that I'm all on her by that
joker painting a picture of me.

And I don't know who or how or when or anything.

Oh, there she is.

I'll tell you what, Charlie.

Trudy's taking off in a couple of days, and after
she leaves, I'll try to help you solve the mystery, okay?

Sure.

Dad told us you flew a traffic helicopter once.

Well, I ran out of gas and had to land on the
freeway, and there I was reporting my own traffic jam.

Oh, boy.

Tell me, what did it feel like when you first soloed?

Well, it really didn't feel like much of
anything until after I'd landed.

And then suddenly I was able to say those
three magic words to myself.

I can fly.

Well, after your trip around the world,
where is there love to go?

You know, love, I hadn't thought of that.

Well, you could be a lady astronaut,
go to the moon, couldn't you?

Yes.

Fellas, this is beginning to sound a
little like a press conference.

Oh, I don't mind, really.

They make me feel at home.

Anybody like a little hot coffee?

Oh, Charley, I want to thank you so much
for that wonderful dinner.

It was heavenly, but I just have one favor to ask.

Sure, anything.

Would you make some sandwiches for me to
take on the flight?

I'd be glad to.

Oh, boy, Uncle Charley's going to be an air hostess.

Well, it'll be the farthest my Bologna
sandwiches have ever been away from home.

Oh, Douglas.

I'd forgotten what an evening at home could be like.

You certainly made a hit with the boys and Charley.

Must be my new perfume.

Flight fuel number five.

Just because you happen to be a pilot,
don't underestimate your talents as a woman.

You know, Douglas, for the first time, I find myself wondering
what life could be like with both feet on the ground.

I think I've been missing something.

Well, didn't you tell me you were born with wings?

Douglas.

When I get back from my flight, will I see you again?

Oh, sure.

Yeah, my assignment isn't over until I get
a full report on the ladybug.

Boy, you'd think they'd let her take off
without so much fuss.

She's gonna break a speed record.

She's sure holding things up.

Here's the sandwiches.

Oh, thank you, Charley, thank you.

I've got something for you, too.

Well, thank you, too, Chip.

A rabbit's foot!

Oh, thanks.

I guess it's a dip.

Well, come on, I'll tuck you in.

Bye!

Now, any last words?

Well, just fly the course.

Oh, I keep telling my butterfly.

Oh, you'll be fine.

Just remember, the whole Douglas family's
with you all the way.

Thanks.

Goodbye, everybody!

Goodbye!

Now,

from Shannon Airfield in Ireland,
comes word that globe-girdling Trudy

Bennett has landed safely in a round-the-world effort.

Hey, so far, so good, huh?

Yeah.

That's because Dad did such a good job with her plane.

And also, she asked my rabbits for it.

Well, thanks for giving me first billing, Chipper.

Sure, planes he can fix up.

But a simple little matter like finding
out who insulted me in oil.

See, it's this way, Mr. O'Casey.

I didn't want to tell you I was painting him because
then you'd be more natural, if you know what I mean.

But why did you have to make it such a big deal?

Such a big secret afterward.

Well, I just didn't want the other guys
down at the company to know.

I mean, they all go bowling
on their spare time and sh**ting

pool and fishing and things
like that, you know what I mean?

I just couldn't spill it to them that,
well, it's painting I like.

Well, you just keep on with your painting.

And any time you want me to model for you...

Thank you, Mr. O'Casey.

Gee, you just been swell about this whole thing.

Now, how about a glass of milk?

No, thank you.

I never touch that stuff.

That's the distance you covered yesterday.

Sure is a good thing the world is round.

How come?

Because a plane can't make right-angle turns.

Come on, you guys.

She'll be all right.

Yeah, sure she will.

She's a competent pilot.

And she's got Chip's lucky rabbit's foot.

Well, Chipper, I guess it's your turn, then.

Thank you for what we were about to receive.

Dan, can I say something about Trudy?

Sure, Chip.

That'd be nice.

And please give Trudy Bennett a safe landing.

Roger and out.

Hello?

Is this Mr. Steve Douglas?

Yes.

This is WQQR.

WQQR4.

I'm a ham radio operator in Honolulu, and
I've just received a radio message for you.

Yes, well, go on, WQQR4.

It's from Trudy Bennett.

You heard from her?

I've got her on the air right now.

She had to make a forced landing on New Guinea.

Ask her what happened.

He says, what happened?

My radio's out, but that's the least of my worries.

There's a leak in the oil line.

She says her radio's out, but that's okay.

She says she has a leak in her oil line.

Oh.

Well, ask her if there's anybody there who can fix it.

He says, is there anyone there who can help you fix it?

Tell him no.

I'm on an old emergency air strip left over from the w*r.

Nobody here but us New Guinea natives and
a ham radio operator.

Well, he can fix the radio, but not the oil line.

She says there's no one there who can help her fix it.

Ask her if she has any nail Polish.

Nail Polish?

Yeah, you know, nail Polish.

He says, do you have any nail Polish?

Nail Polish?

Yeah, you know, nail Polish.

Why, I wouldn't be caught dead in the New
Guinea jungle without it.

Then you don't have any.

As a matter of fact, I do.

She says she's got some.

Good.

Then let's cut out the she says stuff, huh?

Now tell her to get some adhesive tape out
of her first aid kit, wrap it around the

leak, then take the nail Polish and coat it over
and over again until there's a good thick shell.

That ought to hold her if she gets to her next stop.

Miss Bennett, get an adhesive from your
first aid kit, wrap it around the leak in

the line, and then keep applying the
Polish until it makes a good hard shell, okay?

Okay.

I'm on my way.

And tell him he's a doll.

You're a doll.

What?

Well, he said to get out the she says business.

Oh.

Thanks, W2QR4, you're a doll, too.

Good night, fellas.

Good night.

Good night, Dad.

Good night.

Good night.

No,

no, the plane was...

It's the first time this service has been
done by a woman, you know.

I couldn't have broken that record without
your help, Steve.

Oh, thank you, ma'am.

Um, the sponsors are already after me to make another trip.

Oh?

Yeah, over the pole.

Over the pole?

I'd be the first woman.

And you'll do it, too.

Officers have been coming in all afternoon to, uh, oh,
test new planes and make speeches and write some articles.

I even have a chance to, uh, bring out my
own line of ladies' flying apparel.

They, uh, they want to call the company
Ladybug Incorporated.

Yeah.

You'll be the first Incorporated ladybug I've ever known.

You know, it's, uh, it's a funny thing, Steve.

You, uh, you spend your whole life working
towards one goal.

And then when you reach it, you wonder if
it's what you really wanted.

Does that make any sense?

Oh, sure.

Sure, I guess so.

Maybe it's what you really wanted.

This time, I, uh, I stopped being Trudy
Bennett girl aviator.

Maybe with a, a little help, I could be
Trudy Bennett girl woman.

Trudy, do you think you could give up,
uh, well, everything you have now?

I mean, could you exchange an instrument panel with
turn-and-bank indicators and a blue Gauge and a altimeter?

For a kitchen with a refrigerator and a
stove and a washing machine?

I mean, would you really be happy?

I guess not.

Well, if I'm, uh, gonna take the ladybug over the
pole, I'll be needing some more of that expert advice.

You caught me, Ann.

Are we?

Oh, I'm starved.

Well, let's drink up.

Yeah.

To the, uh... Uh, ladybug again.

You'd think he'd want to make another painting of me.

The loose-lipped wreck always used the
same model over and over.

Actually, I forgot to tell you,
I, uh, I finally dropped by Eames.

Galleries yesterday to take a look at the
picture, and they, uh, told me it had been sold.

Yeah, I know.

I, uh, I wonder who.

I think it would look good over the fireplace, don't you?

Well, uh, why don't we talk about it, Charlie?