07x15 - You Saw a What?

[bunniefuu]

Hey, you guys, guess what?

I give up.

The Greaves got booked into the beat.

Say that in English.

He means that combo that he plays with, the Greaves.

I'm going to be at that nightclub called The Beat.

Hey, Robbie, can I go and hear you play?

Oh, you're too young, Ernie.

I'll come opening night.

Sorry, Uncle Charlie, you're too old.

Ah, fine nightclub.

You're either too young or too old.

How do they do business?

Teenagers.

Hey, Rob, this could be something real big.

Yeah.

Imagine actually getting paid for playing.

I would have paid you guys to quit playing.

I think I'll call Dad, tell him about it.

He'll get a real charge out of it.

And ask him when he's coming home.

A long distance, I'd like to make a
person-to-person call to Stephen Douglas.

Starlight Hotel, Hollywood, California.

I've got it, Dave.

Maybe that's California Aircraft with our answer call.

Yeah, I hope so.

I should get back home.

Hello.

Yes, this is Stephen Douglas.

Oh.

Hi, Rob.

Well, that's wonderful.

When do you open?

Well, that'll give you time to rehearse, won't it?

Not that you need it.

Yeah, well, just don't let it interfere
with your studies, Rob.

Right.

No, we haven't heard.

We submitted our bid a couple of days ago.

We should have an answer by tomorrow at the latest.

Yeah.

Well, give my best to Charlie and the boys.

And thanks for calling and telling me the good news.

Okay, Rob.

Go on.

Well, good news.

Yeah, well, Robbie has this combo called the Greifs.

And, uh, Greifs?

That's spelled G-R-E-E-F-S.

It's some kind of an instrument.

Anyway, they're opening at the beat.

The what?

That's spelled B-E-A-T.

It's a new teenage dance place they've
opened in Bryant Park.

And that's good news?

You know, Steve, I still can't understand
why they call it music.

I guess our folks said the same thing when we
crowded around Benny Goodman and Tommy Dorsey, huh?

Yeah.

See, I'm getting hungry.

How about some dinner, huh?

Fine.

I heard about a good steak place a couple
of blocks from here.

That's okay with me.

I could use a good steak.

Well, I hope those guys call them my arm.

Oh, it should be along here someplace, Steve.

This is McCatton, isn't it?

Yeah, yeah.

Let's look down at the corner.

Okay.

Hey, Dave.

Look.

Claudia Farrell.

You suppose that's the Claudia Farrell in
a place like this?

She used to be one of the best.

Dave, why don't we go in, just for old time's sake?

We can have dinner and catch the early show.

Are you sure you want to?

It might spoil some good memories.

Oh, she can't have changed that much.

I know we haven't.

I hope you're kidding.

You'd be so nice To come home to You'd be
so nice By a fire While the breeze on high.

Sang a lullaby You'd be all that I could
desire Under stars chilled By the winter,

under an August moon, burning above, you'd be so
nice, you'd be a paradise to come home to and love.

By the winter, under an August moon, burning above, you'd
be so nice, you'd be a paradise to come home to and love.

Nothing, thanks.

Well, you still sing great.

I certainly do.

I was telling Mr. Welch, I guess I bought
every record you ever made.

Well, you know, tonight was like something
pleasant out of the past.

I remember the first time I heard you sing, Miss Farrell.

You were singing in New York at the Persian.

I had to bribe the maitre d' to get a
table, and it was right way in the back.

My wife and I caught her at the Copa on
our fifth anniversary.

You know, Steve, there was a line all the
way around the block.

I believe it.

Times have changed.

Nobody's buying my singing now.

Well, I just don't understand that.

I mean, I think you're singing better than you ever did.

Mr. Douglas, we're living in a new world.

Oh, what new world?

Teenagers.

They make the stars today.

Well, look at the top 50 records in Billboard.

Folk singing, rock and roll, the Animals,
the Beatles, and Rolling Stones.

Yeah, I guess there's something to that.

My son Robbie's in college.

He's playing with a group, and they've
just been booked into a nightclub.

They're hardly more than amateurs.

Well, there you are, the new scene.

Oh, some of my generation do all right,
but I never made it.

Well, have you tried the new whatever it is?

Sure.

I did my best to analyze what makes it go,
you know, the beat, the sound.

I came up with nothing.

I guess I'm not hip after all.

Well, it was very nice meeting you and,
uh, took me back quite a way.

Well, nice meeting you, Ms. Farrell.

Thank you.

You know, I wish there were still a couple
of million like you.

Oh, Steve.

Well, Grayson called me.

Well, you were out there, except that our
bid, well, it's about time.

Boy, we really sweated that one out, didn't we?

Now we can go home, huh?

Well, I can, but I was kind of hoping you'd
stay around Hollywood a few days longer.

Well, why me?

Well, they want to talk to you about modifications.

Now, look, I have to go to Washington to
make certain we get a priority on the equipment.

Will you do it?

Well, I hope to be home in time for
Robbie's opening at the beat, but,

well, I just won't be able to make it, that's all.

Well, I'm sorry.

Bye.

I dreamed, I dreamed was not denied me, just one
look and then I knew that all I longed for long ago was you.

Hello, Mr. Douglas.

Miss Farrell, sit down, won't you?

Thank you.

It's nice of you to come back again.

Well, I can't think of a more pleasant way
to spend another evening in Hollywood.

I'm glad you didn't wait till tomorrow night.

I won't be here.

Oh, you won't?

They gave me my notice.

Oh.

Oh, I could see it coming.

They hired some new rock and roll singer.

And I can't blame them.

I didn't draw break-even money.

Well, where do you go now?

Oh, I don't know.

Maybe I'll drive back to New York.

Maybe I'll drive back to New York.

There's always hope beyond the next hill.

Well, I wish you luck.

I need more than luck.

I need a small miracle.

Say it.

Well, go ahead.

Say it.

Well, Bryant Park is just 12 miles off the highway.

Bryant Park?

It's where I live.

It's a small town.

Now, Miss Farrell... Claudia.

To my friends and fans.

Okay, Claudia.

Now, you remember what we were talking about last night?

How the kids are taking over?

Oh, it's a new revolution, and I'm on the wrong side.

Well, how... What if you got a
chance to work with a teenage group?

I mean, just to, well, sort of pick up their style.

Do you know any teenagers who want to call
themselves Mama and the Kids?

Maybe.

I told you I had a son, Robbie, who has a group, and
they're booked into this teenage spot in Bryant Park.

Do you think I should take singing lessons from your son?

Oh, no, no, no.

You're the pro, and, uh... Well, they're
amateurs, but, uh... Well, Robbie is a kid, and, uh...

He knows what teenagers like.

Mr. Douglas...

Uh, call me Steve, huh?

Steve, um... I'm very grateful to you for
wanting to help, but... Well, it's worth a try, isn't it?

Mr. Douglas, um...

Steve...

This goes beyond nostalgia.

Yeah, well, maybe it does.

Maybe I'm trying to preserve something in
my own memory, or, uh...

But no matter what the reason is, you're
not going to lose anything by trying, right?

I guess not.

Claudia who?

Uh, how do you spell it, Dad?

Oh, what does she do?

What does she do?

Are you joking, Rob?

She's a big singing star.

She's sold as many records as anybody you can name.

You want me to teach a singer that age to sing our stuff?

Dad, you gotta be kidding.

No, I'm serious, Rob.

All I ask is that you let her sing a few
numbers with your group.

You know, study your style and your beat.

Maybe she means nothing to you,
Rob, but, uh, well, this is for me, okay?

Okay, Dad.

I'll tell Uncle Charlie she's coming.

If she's your friend, I guess that's good enough.

Okay, bye.

Oh, boy.

Hey, Chip.

Yeah?

Chip, have you ever heard of Claudia Farrell?

No.

I did.

You did?

Yeah.

I think he plays left field for the Orioles.



I didn't say Claude Farrell.

Claudia Farrell.

A woman ball player?

What's this world coming to?

Hiya, Robbie.

Hi.

Uncle Charley, did you ever hear of Claudia Farrell?

The big star?

Of course I did.

I didn't.

Are you kidding?

We used to sit and listen to her records by the hour.

Dad says she's on her way here.

Oh, I can't believe it.

When?

She arrives tomorrow.

Boy, that's really something.

Hey, Steve never mentioned that he knew her.

No, he didn't.

He just met her in Hollywood.

Dad said he still has some of her old
records up in the attic.

She's having problems with her career.

Dad said I might be able to give her a few pointers.

You give Claudia Farrell pointers?

That's like Ernie teaching Mickey Mantle how to bat.

Miss Farrell?

Yes, and you must be the... And Miss Claudia Farrell?

Oh, this is an honor.

Steve told us to expect you.

Come in.

Thank you.

Mr. O'Casey?

Charley O'Casey.

I've been a fan of yours ever since you
started singing, way back when.

Thank you.

And thanks for my hotel reservations and
the beautiful flowers you had in my room.

Well, this must be tr*mp.

We have to apologize for the dog.

He's the only one that doesn't play your records.

Won't you come in?

Boys.

Boys, one of our greatest stars, Claudia Farrell.

This is Robbie and Chip and Ernie.

How do you do?

Glad to meet you.

Me too.

I listen to all your records.

Miss Farrell, can I have your autograph?

Of course.

May I ask why?

I'm a fan of yours.

And how long have you been a fan?

Well, since I was a kid.

Miss Farrell, it's a great honor to have
someone as famous as you visiting us.

Gosh, yeah, we're really impressed.

I have a suggestion to make.

Suppose we level with each other.

What do you mean?

I doubt if any of you boys ever heard of me
until your father told you I was coming, right?

I heard of you, Miss Farrell.

Thank you.

I want us to be friends, and I think
friends should be honest.

Okay?

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Sure.

Do I have to give you back your autograph?

No, Ernie.

I'd be flattered to have you keep it.

Now, Robbie, when do I sit in with your group?

I'd be flattered to have you keep it.

I'd be flattered to have you keep it.

How'd you like it, Miss Farrell?

I liked it fine.

It kind of gets to you after a while.

Yeah.

I don't know.

There's something about it.

The rhythm, the beat.

Right.

That number has to move.

There's something right now and then gone.

Do you read music?

No, no.

We feel it might hurt our playing.

She's got a good voice, good range,
everything except, well, she just doesn't make it.

Did you tell her that?

Oh, no, I couldn't do that, Dad.

How does she think she's doing?

She'd never admit she was licked.

She's got moxie.

She expects to go on with us tomorrow night.

Well, she's a pro, Rob.

And something happens to pros when they
get in front of an audience.

I think it's worth giving her a try.

Dad, you haven't been to these teenage clubs.

They're wild.

They're real wild.

And if they don't like somebody, brutal.

Oh, I doubt that, Rob.

No matter what anybody says, teenagers are people.

Don, take this laundry down to Uncle Charley, will you?

Yeah.

Hi, you cats are really going to dig the sounds.

They're too much.

The guys sound great tonight.

Oh, thank you.

Thank you.

Let's see you guys inside.

Have a good time.

Oh, uh, you cats hung up?

The nearest middle-aged woman.

The nearest pad is three blocks down.

How much?

You mean, you cats actually sting?

Groovy.

Two bucks a throw.

Uh, want to check your number 12s?

I beg your pardon?

Your, uh, your shoes, man.

Oh, uh, do you want to check your shoes?

I think we'll just keep them on.

They're splinters.

That's crazy.

Blow them instead.

If you don't get up, then I could serve breakfast in bed.

I'd be a good man to have around the house.

You know, I don't remember having had that
much energy when I was their age.

So far, so good, it's warm in here.

I know how to do something.

Your father just can't sh**t.

Yes, I do, baby.

I'm scared.

Just remember, Robbie's on your side.

I'd feel better if I were Petula Clark.

Who's Petula Clark?

Don't look now, Charlie, but your generation is showing.

I don't know.

And I'm a hound.

Be quiet, everybody.

Hold on a second.

Tonight we have a surprise.

A special guest of honor.

Ringo.

Barry McGuire.

My wife and brother.

A friend of ours would like to sing.

Let's give her a nice warm round of applause.

Don't let them scare you, Miss Ferrell.

If they come up here, they've got to get by us first.

Thanks, Robbie.

Okay?

Okay.

Who's that?

Somebody's mother.

Gonna get ya.

I'm coming out after you.

Since I met ya, that's all I've wanted to do.

Yeah.

I won't give up till I hear ya pounding down my door.

Gotta get ya, get ya to wanna get me.

They're not listening.

They're dancing.

Is that good or bad?

It's bad.

They like Robbie's beat, but she's not
getting through them.

And I'll bet ya it's gonna happen tonight, babe.

I won't give up till I hear you pounding down my door.

I gotta get ya, get ya to wanna get me.

Gotcha!

That means you don't have to translate.

Seems.

Okay in any general.

Well, what are we going to do?

Stick around.

I'd be glad to.

There's another episode of My Three Sons
straight ahead on TV Land's Twice as Nice Morning.

We'll be right back.