07x17 - My Pal Dad

[bunniefuu]

©.

BF-WATCH TV 2021.

Come on, you guys.

Breakfast has been ready for 20 minutes.

Well, there's nothing like a late
breakfast early in the morning, Kelly.

Very funny.

Did you guys know that the brain of the
Stegosaurus weighed only two and a half ounces?

Well, it's very interesting, Ernie.

The most interesting part is the brain
only weighed two and a half ounces,

but the Stegosaurus weighed six and a half tons.

Boy, what I'd like somebody to tell me is
who needs Shakespeare.

Well, Rob, Shakespeare is part of our cultural heritage.

We all ought to know something about it.

Okay, so 400 years ago he wrote a lot of plays
and school kids have been suffering ever since.

We read Julius Caesar last year.

The story's okay if you put it in English.

Well, language changes.

Sure, and so does everything else.

Well, this isn't 1600.

Who cares about a creepy old Scottish king
when we're landing on the moon?

Nobody, except Professor Tompkins.

He thinks you need Shakespeare.

Oh, boy.

Everybody in his class has to demonstrate
Shakespeare's pertinence to the present day.

Whatever that means.

I'll get the paper.

Once you get past the language barrier, you'll find
that Shakespeare has many wonderful things to say.

And what do you think you're doing?

Sorry, I'm watering our chrysanthemums.

Well, keep the water on your chrysanthemums,
your flowers, and off our morning courier.

If you don't want it to get wet,
don't leave it laying around.

Well, it just happened to be laying around in our driveway.

A no good rag like the courier could use
washing with soap as well as water.

Yeah?

Well, I don't remember asking for your opinion.

Oh, I'm sorry, Dad.

The beat really gets to me.

Well, it was really getting to me, too.

It's the number one song this week.

Are you ready for Annihilation?

Are you ready for Annihilation?

It was written by the same kid who did
Don't You Hear the Boom Boom of Doom.

The Boom?

You mean that was a hit, too?

Yeah.

Look at that paper.

Just look at that paper.

New Unrest in Near East.

Well, Charlie, you can't help the
situation any by getting so upset about it.

I ain't upset about the Near East.

I'm upset about next door.

Those new people that rented over there.

Yeah.

It's nice to have neighbors to get you.

Yeah?

Well, if the one I just met is any sample,
you'll wish the place was empty again.

What are you doing with the paper, Uncle Charlie?

What do you think?

I'm going to fake it to a golden brown and
serve it with whipped cream and strawberries.

Well, if somebody can have my share.

I've got to run.

I'll see you fellows tonight.

Come on.

Hi.

Hi.

Uh, you going to the campus?

I've got a nine O'clock.

May I give you a lift?

Oh, I'd really appreciate it.

I was headed for the bus.

Yeah.

I'm Robbie Douglas.

Oh, Peggy Snell.

Oh.

Say, uh, you're in my English Lit class.

Oh, Polly's side, too.

And now we're neighbors.

Well, welcome to the neighborhood.

Thanks.

You play guitar, too?

I should have known.

I just hung three days' wash out on that line.

What do you think that smoke's going to do
to my clean laundry?

A little soot will never be noticed on your wash.

Are you going to put that fire out, or am I
going to come out there and do it for you?

You step in this yard, Mr. Lyon.

I'll mouth and they'll carry you out.

If you were a man... I wouldn't be doing laundry.

I'm Ernie.

My name's Sonny.

Where'd you get that thing?

I sent away for it.

Cost $3.

I know a kid who's got one with a real motor.

Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, railroad.

Bill, but.

Dante never will land this bright railroad bill.

You play a lot of guitar.

It's easy to follow you.

You know, I'm glad I drove you to school this morning.

So am I.

Of course, we would have gotten together.

Anyway, I mean, living next door.

It'll be nice having neighbors, real neighbors.

We've been living in an apartment house since my
dad died, and everybody just ignores everybody else.

How many people in your family?

Four, five counting Aunt Maude.

She's going to keep house for us.

Just like my Uncle Charlie.

My mother's head buyer at Crichton's
department store, and I have two brothers.

Oh, we have to get them together with my two brothers.

Perfect.

You're not doing it right.

Let me show you.

I only got it yesterday.

I'm not going to hurt it.

Don't wind it too tight.

I know what I'm doing.

Hey, it's turning.

You really got gypped.

I asked you not to wind it so tight.

Don't go blaming me.

It took me a month to save up the $3.

The one with the motor is a lot better.

Here, you take this and give me my $3.

I don't want that piece of junk.

You made it crash.

Let go.

It's only fair.

Robbie, have you decided on your Shakespeare project?

Ah, I'm stumped.

Me too.

Well, maybe we could work on something together.

Uh, Professor Tompkins said it was all
right to collaborate.

Well, let's do it.

But when it comes to Shakespeare...

Two heads are better than one.

Hi.

Hi, Chip.

What happened?

You run into something?

Sonny Snell's fist.

Who's Sonny Snell?

Next door.

He wrecked my plane, too.

Three dollars.

What?

It's part of their not-so-good neighbor policy.

Why didn't you hit him back?

Because he doesn't wear glasses.

Don't do anything I wouldn't like.

Don't.

You Sonny Snell?

Yeah.

Ernie Douglas is my brother.

So?

You're going to apologize for pushing him
around, and you're going to pay for this.

No, I'm not.

Yes, you are.

I'm not.

Look, kid, I don't want to hurt you, so you go
inside and get some money and pay for this.

Oh.

The new neighbors.

Oh.

What's her name again?

Snell?

Yeah.

Oh, well.

Why don't you let them move it?

I'll move it.

I don't want to make an issue out of it.

Yeah, well, let me make an issue out of it.

Charlie, what are you doing?

That dame tossed this stuff over here.

She's going to get it back with interest.

We'll be right back.

We'll be right back with My Three Sons,
when twice as nice mornings and My Three Sons.

Boys have the strangest ways of getting acquainted.

You're going to leave my kid brother alone, you understand?

He started it with Ernie.

I don't think they're kidding.

Hey, hold on, you two, hold it.

Stay out of this.

This is between the snills.

Douglas is... Well, I'm a Douglas.

Pete, what's the matter with you?

The Douglas's are going to find out they
can't push their snills around.

Okay.

Pete, would you please stop?

I don't have any fight with you.

I haven't even met you.

Oh, you're a Douglas and I'm a snill.

Well, what kind of an answer is that?

Look, will you just cool off and we'll talk this over?

Oh, Pete, Robbie, please.

Won't anybody listen to me?

Sure, Peggy, I want to listen, but I... Look out, Rob.

Robbie.

I'm sorry, Peggy.

Let's go, Jim.

Oh, Robbie, Pete, what's the matter with everybody?

Oh, how do you do?

Whatever you're selling, we don't want any.

Well, I'm not selling anything yet.

I'm Stephen Douglas.

I'm your next-door neighbor.

Oh, won't you come in?

Oh, well... Oh, thank you.

I really hate to complain, but... Vera!

It's another one of those troublemakers from next door.

Well, Mr. Douglas.

Uh, Mrs. Snell.

You must be very proud of your boys.

Well, uh, yes, I... Bullies, delinquents,
attacking my Pete and Sonny.

My boys attacked your boys?

Just look at them.

Mother, Robbie isn't a bully or a delinquent.

It's all a misunderstanding.

Well, I'm sure it is.

Peggy, I'll handle this, please.

Now, Mr. Douglas?

If I could just bring my boys over here.

Oh, no, no.

You ought to keep your boys off our property,
and I'll see that our children stay off your property.

They're not so much as even to speak to each other.

Mother!

And now, Mr. Douglas, will you please leave?

Mrs. Snell.

There is just nothing more to be said.

You stay on your property, we shall stay on ours.

Goodbye.

Goodbye.

Mrs. Snell, your bicycle is parked in my driveway.

Well, I'll move it.

Good for you.

Thank you.

Robbie?

Have you thought about what I said this afternoon?

I wish we didn't have to make up our minds so quickly.

Well, if we're going to do it, it has to be this weekend.

And now we're their families feeling the way they do.

Peggy, this is important to you and me.

I think we ought to go ahead and do it and tell them later.

Maybe it'll bring them together.

All right, Robbie.

Two heads are better than one.

Till tomorrow.

Good night.

Good night.

Come on, it's all right.

Come on.

What happened with him?

Just a battle casualty.

Schnell's cat.

It's only a little scratch on the nose.

This will make you a member of the family.

What got you started so early on Saturday?

Blame it on Shakespeare.

If you say so.

I was all wrong about him, Uncle Charley.

He really knew what he was writing about.

Yeah?

Things haven't changed at all.

Life's just the same.

You don't say.

I mean, look at us.

We may be going to the moon, but we're still
exactly like the people Shakespeare wrote about.

It's funny.

Hysterical.

Well, I'm on my way.

It's for done when it is done,
then for well it were done quickly.

William Chase.

Okay.

And if thou hast leave without doing thy chores,
thou hast will do them when thou hast gets back.

Charlie O'Casey.

Give us thou call, while I mendest thy wound.

Uncle Charley?

Yeah?

Should I set a place for Robbie?

He didn't say whether he'd be home for dinner or not.

Where'd he go, Charlie?

Search me.

He took off early this morning.

Said to blame it on Shakespeare.

Blame it on Peggy Snell.

What do you mean, Ernie?

Oh, last night when I went out to feed tr*mp, Robbie
was over under Peggy Snell's window, and they were talking.

She was supposed to meet him this morning,
not tell her mother.

Oh.

He told you he was going someplace because of Shakespeare?

Yeah, said he'd been all wrong about him.

That Shakespeare really knew about life,
and we were just like the people he wrote about.

Of course.

Romeo and Juliet.

What?

Rob and Peg think they're Romeo and Juliet, the
star-crossed lovers separated by their feuding families.

They even played the balcony scene for Ernie.

Yeah, it's pretty sickening.

You know, I think I'll go over and...

I'll get it.

Oh, Mrs. Snell.

Hello.

I hope I'm not bothering you.

Oh, not at all.

As a matter of fact, I was just going over to your house.

Come in, won't you?

Thank you.

I'm worried about Peggy.

She's been gone all day.

Well, so is Rob.

They're playing Romeo and Juliet, you know.

Romeo and... You know, the feuding families.

Oh, Mr. Montague.

At your service, Mrs. Capulet.

I was very rude yesterday, and I'm very sorry.

Just that everything had gone
wrong all day at the store, and

then I came home and found both my boys looking pretty bad.

I understand.

Just where are Peggy and Rob?

Well, I don't know.

Ernie, did you hear them say where they were going?

Peggy said she was a little scared to try.

Robbie said if any two people could make
it work, they could.

Oh, dear.

Sit down, won't you, Mrs. Snow?

Yes, thank you.

Now, I don't think we should jump to conclusions.

After all, they've only known each other a few days.

Well, what about Romeo and Juliet?

You think they've eloped?

Then the snails and us will be relatives.

Hi.

Mother.

Darling, I have been so worried about you.

Oh, I'm sorry, but I knew if I told you what
we wanted to do, well, you'd try and stop us.

And it was just something that had to be
done, no matter how the families felt.

Oh, oh, dear.

Well, Rob, I'm just sorry that you didn't
feel that we could have talked it over before.

Dad, I thought about it, but I decided to go
ahead and do it first and then get your reaction.

Well, I'll give you my reaction.

Uncle Charley, I know your reaction.

You don't like Shakespeare and you don't like modern music.

But when you hear the way Robbie's put them together,
well, I'll bet you change your mind about both of them.

Shakespeare?

Modern music?

Robbie had the idea of taking this terrific
speech of Macbeth's and putting it to music.

You mean that's what you had to do today?

Yeah.

Yeah?

What'd you think it was?

Oh.

It doesn't matter.

Well, as Shakespeare says, all's well that ends well.

Oh, yeah.

Sing a song of protest, a pocket full of
woe William Shakespeare sang it four

hundred years ago Tomorrow and tomorrow
and tomorrow Creeps in its petty pace from

day to day To the last syllable of
recorded time And all our yesterdays Have

lighted fools the way To dusty death Out,
out, out, out, brief candle.

Out, out, out, out, brief candle.

Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player,
that struts and frets his hour upon the stage.

And then it's heard, no, no more.

It is a tale told by an idiot.

Full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.

Nothing.

What could be as nice as an hour with my three sons?

How about an hour with three daughters?

Sure.

Stay tuned for Bobby Joe, Betty Joe, Billy Joe, and
everyone at the Shady Rest Hotel on Petticoat Junction.

As TV Land's Twice as Nice Morning continues.