10x25 - Love Thy Neighbor

[bunniefuu]

My Three Sons Starring Fred McMurray And
his Uncle Charley, William Demarest.

Yeah, only brothers are better than sisters.

They are not.

Do your brothers ever play Jacks with you?

No.

But they will as soon as I ask them to.

You don't have to ask sisters.

They just do it.

And they play house with you and all kinds of junk.

Well, yeah.

How come you don't have any sisters and I got four of them?

I don't know.

Oh, now, wait a minute.

You forgetting Katie?

But Katie's only my in-law sister.

Now, forget the legal stuff.

I'm telling you straight.

Katie is your sister.

My really sister?

Yes.

Will she play Jacks at house and can I cut her up?

Sure.

That's what sisters are for.

My sister Katie has three boy babies born
all at the same time.

And I can see them anytime I want.

Honest?

Yeah.

I'll be my guest.

Look at this.

Well, hi.

Are you a pretty girl?

Are you her new neighbor?

Hello.

Hi.

I'm sorry.

I'll get out of the way.

Oh, that's all right.

I know what a problem moving is.

Triplets?

Isn't that the living end?

Well, if it isn't, we're going to need a hotel.

Oh, darling.

Well, let me move some of these things at least.

Oh, my.

Here, I'll help you.

Oh, moving is just... I know.

I know.

It looks like the girls have already met.

I know.

Really?

I know.

It's done.

I'm a little proud of the home.

It's the phone.

It's nice to meet you.

Get up.

Here.

I can help you with some of this.

Oh, I'd really appreciate it.

Hello?

Oh, hi, Dodie.

Sweetheart, I'm kind of busy.

What?

Oh, yeah.

I guess I am your sister.

How about that?

Oh?

We can play Jacks and make dog clothes and have fun.

Well, sure, sweetheart.

Anytime you say.

Yeah, I got to run.

Bye.

I love you.

Yes, I'll call you back.

Promise.

Cross my heart.

Bye.

She just spit up a little bit.

A he.

Three he's.

There you go.

Eve, guess where Rob works?

In one of the plants.

I said, I don't know.

Hey, Rob, do you know a guy named Fred Winkler?

Oh, man, to think I was worried about you neighbors.

You were worried.

Oh, I could just hear the complaints about
the baby's crying.

Well, now we'll have night concerts.

Three baritones and one soprano.

You're not unpacked yet.

Why don't you come in and I'll fix you some lunch?

Oh, no, no, we couldn't impose.

Don't be silly.

I feed a regiment.

What's your baby's name?

Katie.

Katie?

Oh, that's uncanny.

Rob, you don't believe this.

It's a bulletin, Barbara.

The souffle is now a pancake.

Oh, no.

Oh, yes.

You sure them kids said they were coming over for
dinner tonight and not next Halloween or something?

I'm sure.

What about Chip and Ernie?

You hear from them?

They called.

It looks like they're going to be missing
dinner for the next couple of weeks.

They're working on the sets for the class play.

Who feeds them?

The dramatic department of school, I guess.

I wouldn't worry about it.

Well, somebody better.

Don't worry about something.

Myrtle never worries.

What, honey?

Myrtle's my best friend, and she never
worries about anything.

But you do, huh?

I guess so.

What do you do if somebody's sister doesn't keep a promise?

You know someone who has a sister who
doesn't keep promises?

Oh, Dad.

Hi.

I'm sorry.

We lost all track of time.

We met some neat people.

Oh, good.

We were helping them put up shelf paper.

That's why we're late.

Well, Charley, Barbara, they're here.

I hope dinner isn't ruined.

Well, Charley's temper's up and the souffle's
down, but there's nothing to worry about.

Dad, maybe you know this fella.

He's in the plant two or three times a week.

Are you all coming in or am I supposed to
shove the whole dinner under the door?

And her name is really Evelyn, but
she hated that, so she changed it to Eve.

And do you know she had the same college major I did?

Isn't it funny how fate comes up with the
right things at the right time?

I mean, we could have drawn a couple of clowns next door.

Or an old couple with a feisty dog.

Or people who hate babies.

Dad, did I tell you that Joe has been number
one in his firm in sales for three months running?

Yes, I believe you did mention that.

Well, I'm sorry that you didn't bring the babies tonight.

Katie!

He's watching them.

And guess the name of their baby.

Katie.

That's right, it's Katie.

I'm all choked up.

I guess we have been going on about Joe
and Eve, but they're great for us.

Well, that's good, Rob.

I mean, it looks like a case of love at
first sight for all four of you.

Well, if you were right next door,
why didn't you hear the phone ringing?

Well, Joe must have had his stereo on.

He likes what he calls quality volume.

Dad, did I tell you that he put together that
whole stereo himself just from a diagram?

Yeah, I think you told us, Rob.

Mommy!

What is it, honey?

Even if a person has new friends, can't
she even play their sister sometimes?

You mean Katie?

Yeah.

I told my friend Shirley that
Katie would play house and Jacks

and dolls with me, but she doesn't even listen when I talk.

Well, honey, Katie's busy with her
apartment and the triplets.

And her new friends.

Do you want me to tell Katie how you feel?

No, because then it wouldn't count.

I see.

Well, I can play Jacks and house and
dollies, and you can tell Shirley.

No, she'll say mommy's have to.

Sisters are supposed to be like kids together.

I see.

Katie is so nice that she'd only listen.

Honey, I'm sure she'll listen.

You're watching Fruity Show all night long.

So stay tuned.

Douglas Repair Shop.

I'm just kidding, Dodie.

How's Myrtle?

Well, listen, honey, Katie's busy with the
babies right now.

I'll have her call you, okay?

Promise.

Scouts 100.

Bye.

Check ID.

And was that call for me?

Oh, Rob.

Well, they don't call me Butterfingers for nothing.

Well, I'll get some paper towels.

Where are they?

In the cupboard.

Which one?

Uh, the one on the left.

Not here.

On the left, huh?

Oh, left or right.

Yeah.

Troy.

Have the boys shrunk this much?

Oh, it shrank when Eve accidentally put it
in the dryer with her diapers.

Isn't this the one your mother made?

Yeah.

You know, it's a good thing we don't have the
same problem that they do with Eve's mother.

You know, she keeps sneaking in all their dresser drawers.

I know.

Joe had a real hassle with it when she
asked why he wore nightshirts.

Rob?

Katie?

I smell pickles.

Right on the nose.

What'd you drop this time, King Kong?

No comment.

Hey, did my tongue spit okay?

Good as rented.

Here are your shoes, Katie.

Oh, good.

Are they all stretched?

Well, they've got to be.

My feet are a half size larger than yours.

Thank you.

And I want to show you my new curtain.

Good.

Can I fix you something, Rob?

Uh, no thanks.

No kidding, though.

I really appreciate the loan of the tux.

I did get a little spot on it, though.

I'll pay for the cleaning.

Oh, forget it.

What's the spot between friends?

What's wrong with the lamp?

Oh, old age, I guess.

Here.

I'll fix it for you.

That's all right.

I'm fixing it.

What's the difference?

Some of us are handy.

Others are good at dropping pickles.

Oh, hi, Dad.

Hi, Rob.

Come on in.

Well, am I interrupting your repair job?

No, Joe's got everything under control.

Oh.

This is Joe Laurie, Dad.

Hello, Mr. Douglas.

Hello, Joe.

I've heard a lot about you and your wife.

I'd say you're all pretty lucky to have
such congenial neighbors.

We sure are.

Yeah.

What can I do for you, Dad?

Well, I had to drop by the plant today, and you
said you might need these plants, remember?

Don't tell me we can add a bad memory to
Rob's stone fingers.

Stone fingers?

That's just a little joke, Dad.

Oh.

Well, I'll be running along, Barbara's expecting.

Give my love to Katie.

Yeah.

Nice to meet you, Joe.

Nice meeting you.

That.

Isn't very much to go on, honey.

Well, maybe not, but it's going to happen.

Well, did anybody actually say anything?

No, nobody said anything.

But Rob's always been very good with his hands.

And there he was standing there while this
fellow Joe was fixing his lamp.

And I know that stubborn look of Rob's.

Honey, I've never seen a more level-headed
couple than Robbie and Katie.

Oh, yeah?

I couldn't agree with you more.

But I still say this great friendship is not going to last.

Right?

Right.

All right, so it works.

Big deal.

Well, are you mad at me because the lamp works?

I'm not mad at anybody.

Well, good.

Because I'm going to sit right down here by the
lamp that you would have fixed if you'd had the chance.

And I'm going to write some letters for a change.

We sure haven't had a chance to be alone lately, have we?

No.

I've missed you.

Go right ahead.

We'll set up the game.

The game?

Well, didn't one of us say something to
the others about playing expert tonight?

I don't know.

I don't think so.

It's fine, isn't it, Rob?

Sure.

Well, is this the lamp Joe fixed?

It's nothing Thomas Edison couldn't have done.

Right, Butterfingers?

Right.

Shall I put on the coffee or will you?

I'll do it.

And if you need any help pulling around pickle jars
out there, Katie, remember my husband's right here.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And if you need any help shrinking baby
sweaters, remember, Joe's wife is right here.

Did you tell Rob about that, Katie?

Well, he happened to see me trying to stretch it.

Where do we sit?

Why don't we leave that up to the lamp fixer?

After all, a man who sleeps in a nightshirt ought to
be able to figure out the proper seating for a game.

Very funny.

Well, why don't you be the east and I'll be the west?

Well, Katie, you be north and Eve, you be south.

Uh, not that it really matters, but I
just tried that nightshirt route once.

Once.

Well, don't get mad at me, dear.

I mentioned it to Katie in confidence one day.

I didn't think she'd repeat it.

Well, about those baby sweaters.

How much do they cost, anyway?

Why?

Well, I figure if my wife shrinks one of your kids'
sweaters, even if she means well, we ought to pay for it.

If we're going to start paying each other for every little
thing, well, then I owe you money for the lamp you fixed.

Not to mention the amusement tax for all the
times we hear your stereo free through the walls.

Or rent on my tools that are always over here.

Or rent on your tools, right.

North goes first.

You know, I figure when you tell me something in confidence
that it certainly doesn't mean excluding my own husband.

I'm talking about that nightshirt business.

Fine.

That nightshirt business, as you call it,
has nothing to do with anything.

And if my stereo bothers you, why didn't
you say something about it?

I did.

But you couldn't hear me over all the woofers and tweeters.

Are you finished?

I'm finished.

Let's split.

Fine, if this is the way you want it.

This is the way we want it.

Once I wore that nightshirt.

Once.

Once.

You're watching.

You can count on more episodes of the same
show all night long.

So stay tuned.

Back it up, will you?

Why don't you back it up?

I was here first.

Congratulations.

You go ahead.

After you.

Go ahead.

After you.

After you.

Are you eating alone, Uncle Charley?

Yeah, macaroni casserole.

I got a fight I want to see.

Oh, it's a fight.

Eat with you, Uncle Charley.

Oh, you're going to come with us, Dodie.

I thought that Chip and Ernie had finished
building those stage sets at school.

No, they got grease paint in their veins now.

They're a couple of stage door Johnnies.

Mama, I don't want to go.

What is it, Dodie?

Something you want to tell me?

Oh, there's your dad.

Come on.

Come on, sweetheart.

Goodbye, Uncle Charley.

Goodbye.

Well, Myrtle, here we are again with all our friends.

Want some more coffee, Dad?

No more.

Thanks, Rob.

Well, Katie, it was a wonderful dinner.

Thank you.

I got the recipe for the casserole from that
book you loaned us called Cooking for Newlyweds.

Under these conditions, you kids won't
have to get a hi-fi, will you?

You know, there's a wonderful chapter in that
book called Potatoes Are Your Budget's Best Friend.

But not your waistline.

Lately, Katie's been making a lot of double casseroles.

Sorry.

Are you sure nobody wants any more coffee?

No, thank you.

Rob.

Could we go home?

Honey, you've only been here a little while.

Rob, isn't there some way you can work
this out with the lorries?

I'm afraid not, Dad.

But we've tried too many times.

Besides, I made a promise.

You didn't keep it.

What?

What is it, honey?

Go on.

Robbie said scouts on her, and Katie
crossed her heart, but she didn't call back.

It looks like we have a little problem on
this side of the wall.

You wanted Katie to call you back about what, Dodie?

Uncle Charley said she's my big sister by law,
but I guess you don't want to be my big sister.

Well, of course I do, Dodie.

Why would you say that?

I called you.

I called you on the phone.

And I was busy.

Oh, honey, I'm sorry.

She called me, too.

Dodie, I know that I promised to tell Katie,
but I guess we just let other things interfere.

Honey, sometimes grown-ups get busy and
they forget their promises.

Rob?

Rob.

What are they building in there?

I don't know, Dan.

From now on, honey, you're not only gonna
have a big sister, but you'll have a big brother, too.

And from now on, you call us anytime.

You won't forget, will you, honey?

You mean call us anytime?

Heck no!

I won't forget!

Is everything all right in here?

Joe was hanging a mirror and we heard the
crash on this side.

I could just see the babies underneath the picture.

That's no problem.

The babies are in the other room.

I guess I was hitting the wall a little hard on purpose.

It's okay, Joe.

I mean, it's no big deal.

I'm really sorry.

Sorry about the music and everything.

That's okay, Eve.

Well, now that you guys are here, you want some coffee?

We sure could use it.

I was so frightened.

Now get the cups.

Hey, Jody, you want to help your big sister?

Me!

I'll help you.

Okay, come on.

Well.

What was it Rob said at dinner the other night?

It's funny how fate comes up with the
right thing at the right time.

Hi.

Oh, hi.

Can Jody play?

Well, I don't know.

I don't know.

She's in the mountain cabin playing Jacks with her sister.

Is there a mountain cabin around here?

Oh, sure.

Come on in the cabin, Sharon.

I'm up to threesies and my sister here is up to foursies.

Don't go away.

You don't have to wait for tomorrow to get
more Uncle Charley.

Vertivision means you get great episodes of My
Three Sons stacked back-to-back all night long.

Hey, no kidding?

No kidding.

Only in TV Land.