02x02 - Eco-Wedding

[bunniefuu]

I can't deny it. I'm nervous and excited
about this unexpected marriage...



...that no one believed in.

It comes at a time
full of changes for everyone.

Do you know why Patsy Pat's wedding dress
turned out awful?

Because during the creation process,

the only image that came to mind

was Nicolás Mora making love
to my poor Patsy Pat.

Disgusting!

Mr. Hugo, you should know
it turned out well.

What do you mean? I don't even have
a name for that Baby Dress.

I like that, Baby...

I don't know. You know what?
Find me a Scotch.

-With ice?
-Without a kilt.

Hurry up!

I still believe in love.

That incorrigible, stubborn feeling
that persists despite the odds.

Against the odds.

And it survives like a seed
thrown against the rocks.

I've been looking for you.

Our rival's office is the last place
I expected to find you in.

How's my girl doing?

Thinking about the boyfriend.

I'm happy.

I meant the other boyfriend.

Betty La Fea, The Story Continues

Uncle...

let's assess the situation.

If the fake blonde is pregnant,

and assuming that child is yours...

I don't think that's a reason
for you to get married.

There, I said it.

Especially in these modern times,
when so many things are possible.

-No, no.
-A father with...

I'm not marrying her because of the baby.

The kid is mine, that much is clear. Okay?

Watch it. I'm marrying her because...

Because I love her.

You deserve a handsome man

to bring some color to your life.

What do we women do
when we want to forget a guy?

Girl, it's this easy. Obviously.

Well, I guess she's right.

Just like you got over Freddy, right?

No, that's different.
He wanted to leave. What do you mean?

Would you look at that? She's got amnesia.

What do you mean he wanted to leave?

You were the one who vanished.

Are you denying it now?

What's this about Marcela
being the Godmother and not Betty?

Mr. Germs, that's marriage for you.

You know how it goes.

Pati chose her.

And Pati's the boss now.

Look, I agreed to be your best man

because I respected your mother,
who put you in my care.

What if Mrs. Eugenia, bless her soul,

were to see you being forced
into marriage?

All because of an unplanned pregnancy.

Mr. Hermes, the pregnancy thing
is a secondary effect.

Actually, it's a fecundatory effect.

Patsy Pat, are you aware that henceforth,

you're going to be called Patricia Mora?

What do you mean, Huguito?

She hasn't got the "Me-Mora-ndum" yet.

Hey, listen,
when the priest gives communion,

he will say, "In the name
of the Father, the Son".

Huguito, don't say that, it's a sin.

No, that is a sin.

Pregnant? I've seen this movie before.

Remember when the fake blonde
made Mr. Daniel Valencia

and Mario Calderón believe
that she was pregnant?

-Yes.
-The fake blonde will never change.

She'll be crucified.

Mr. Mario knows she's pregnant.

Could the child be his, Sandra?

Is it true that you're pregnant?

If I were, what would happen, Mario?

I'd assume it's not mine.

-What will you name the baby?
-After his dad. Why?

-Do you know the father's name?
-Of course.

Daniel.

Even then, she had two studs
to play around with.

But she's looking
to tie the knot now, isn't she?

To get hitched.

No, seriously now, Patsy Pat,

when the priest says,
"Till death do you part,"

how will you respond?

"I'll make do."

"Could be worse."

No, it's a marriage of convenience.

It's convenient for him
that she does the housekeeping,

and it's convenient for her
with menopause breathing down her neck.

But I do want to get married.

And...

And I do want to be a mother...

I'm happy, and...

Even though those wretches
don't believe me!

I thought we'd lost her.

That pregnancy is fake.

I overheard a conversation,
and Patricia never got an ultrasound.

-What?
-She says she's three months pregnant.

-Did she really do that?
-What?

That's right. Typical of her.

What's the potato tsar doing
at the nerd and fake blonde's wedding?

Apparently, my sister invited him,

and of course he wants to find
his next disastrous fling.

I love it.

That means we're making progress.

Anyway, I think it's super cute.

Is he with us or with that circus?

He'll play for the side I'm on.

I never make mistakes
when choosing my team.

What do you think?

What about Commander Daddy?

Commander Daddy is a different matter.

But he won't be an issue,

because I've got him
under control and neutralized.

He'll either have to choose me

or a district attorney
who will send him back to jail.

Hey, Majo. Nice to see you! Come in.

What can I do for you?

Please, make yourself comfortable.
Take a seat.

Majo, I'm sorry.

Majo, what do you want?

I have a plan and I want you in.

To be honest, I don't want in.

It's related to Ecomoda.

It's a great chance
to make a strong comeback

and not under the shadow of your ex.

What makes you think I'd want that?

At the end of the day,
it's your company and your family's,

and I know that deep down, you care.

Of course I care a lot.

It's my daughter's patrimony,
of course I care, but...

-Of course.
-Of course.

Of course, it's your daughter.

The one who won't talk to you
or hear you out.

But that's another story.

Listen, it's important
for you to understand

that this is a g*ng fight.

You're the last person they want.

You weren't even informed
about the wedding.

Did you know there was a wedding?

Now, if you could just be more thoughtful

and a bit more loving, it'd be ours.

Look who's coming.

Betty.

This is a miracle.

It's finally happening.

Bombshell.

My beloved people,
we are gathered here tonight

for the union of these two loving beings.

In the name of the Father,
the Son and the Holy Spirit, amen.

You also need to understand this...

As long as I have influence
over the prosecutor in your case,

and I could give them a little push
to bring charges,

you're mine.

But I might grow tired,
so think about what you'll do.

Majo, I'm sorry.

There's no need to push. I know I owe you.

-But I'm not asking to repay me.
-That's right.

But I feel bad because I'm like,

"Majo, you've been so good to me,

-and I didn't pay it back." I feel bad.
-Exactly.

I don't know why you treat me like enemy
when I'm supposed to be on your side.

-You're on my side, yes.
-Right.

But you're also on his side.

-Whose side?
-Ignacio's.

You're working with him,
and he's got a hold on Betty.

It's weird, right?

-I'm up against the wall here.
-Here we go again about your ex.

Let that go already!

Open yourself up to new opportunities.

Take a leaf out of her book.

She's back on the saddle.

She's getting over you.

In fact, her lawyer
is helping her with that.

-No, no.
-Yes.

I disagree on that one. He's not helping.

He isn't? So what is it? Enlighten me.

-Hi, Mr. Armando.
-Hi, Betty.

I don't know, I...

I do know.

Right now, in your life,

I'm the only choice.

And Ecomoda, for now.

We're standing before two people
who wish to be joined in holy matrimony.

If anyone objects to this union,

speak now or forever hold your peace.

Her bank account
is the one with the objection.

Hey, Hugay. Stop it. Enough, Hugay.

Om mani padme hum

Look.

I was invited to the wedding, you know?

I didn't want to go.

-Don't worry, I get it.
-What do you get?

You didn't go to avoid seeing
your ex with her new boyfriend.

You get it.

That train has left the station.

-What...
-This one too.

Do not judge my appearance.

I no longer belong to this world,
which is superficial,

super facile, super easy.

Super high, that's what you are.

And you, distinguished faithful servant,

please, carry on with this beautiful rite

that exalts love for the centuries...

-I don't know, but that...
-Namaste.

No, that's not Freddy Stewart.

That's not the little Cricket I know.

I like this new,
different and enlightened Freddy.

Shall we proceed?

-Yes.
-Of course, Father.

-Om...
-Hare, Hare.

What God has joined together,
let no one separate.

In the name of the Father,
the Son and the Holy Spirit, amen.

-Amen.
-Son, you may kiss the bride.

I feel sorry for them.

-Nicolás, I couldn't breathe.
-Bravo!

Long live the newlyweds!

Bravo!

Freddy. Cricket!

You have no idea how happy
and excited I am to see you again

after such a long time.

Time is like the flow of a river.

-It never returns.
-A river?

Freddy, are you all right?

Freddy, I'm talking to you.

Dumbass.

"Silence is a source of great strength."

Lao Tzu. Okay?

-What?
-Freddy...

Tell us, where have you been?

You've been working out too.

I can't believe what I'm seeing.
What's this?

Love is that umbilical cord
that unites us,

although it's better
to be wireless sometimes.

Come, tell us.

Did you learn about... tantric sex?

Tantric.

-Come here. Relax.
-What?

Relax. Calm down.

You want me to find someone
that adds color to my life. Here he is.

-Go ahead, sir!
-Bravo!

Bravo!

There you go!

Bravo!

Well done!

You think Freddy has been replaced?

The aliens alienated him.

Well, it suits him.

What?

My sweet guru,
could we spend some kala chakra together?

Om mani padme hum

Bravo!

There we go!

I'll dance with him.

Okay, dance away.

Don't give me that lemony look.

-What?
-Don't look sour.

All I want is a toast with you. Here.

To this beautiful project, Ecomoda.

Don't overreact.

You have nothing to do with Ecomoda.

You better keep your distance, all right?

My offer still stands.

I'll give you a beautiful, tolerable,

and friendly relationship.

Cheers!

Go, Mommy! This way!

There we go!

Marce, it's the most anticipated moment!
I'm tossing the bouquet. Let's go.

No. No way.

Well done! I find it beautiful
that you think that way.

You don't need all that,
because you already have an owner.

Cheers.

The moment we've all been waiting for!

Gather around! I'm tossing the bouquet!

Where are all the single ladies,
the widows?

The separated ones, the unfaithful ones?

Why don't you go up there? You never know.

Me? Succumb to that medieval yoke?

No, let me pass.

Hey, you know who would be
perfect for that? Carmen.

Look at her. She looks so eager.

To do what, Mila? Marry me?

No, baby.

The guy who's living with her
and won't make up his mind.

Betty, come. The bouquet!

No, no. You go on, ladies.

What do you mean?
Come with us, you're single now.

Don't press her.

It's always handsome men
over beautiful girlfriends.

I'd love me one!

-So that's a no?
-Go.

Okay then. Your loss.

Esteban, so embarrassing. I'm honestly...

-Don't worry.
-One...

...a little scared it might land on me.

I never take part in this.

-Three!
-Three!

Get married! Get married!

Get married! Get married!

Get married...

Hey, dumbass!

What is wrong with you?

Have you forgotten your sweetheart?

No.

You're like that comet
that comes around every ten years.

Make that mistake again
and see what happens.

Excuse me.
One with Mr. Hermes. I love this.

-Divine!
-Yes.

Who would have thought Ecomoda
would host an event, right?

Who would have thought?

Look at this paradox. Everyone is happy
and having the time of their lives,

everyone except the two of us.

You know, I thought of you all afternoon.

I wanted to see you,

but I think I interrupted
a magical moment with Esteban.

Let me remind you that we've been
legally divorced for three months now.

-That hurts.
-I'll tell my mom to teach you.

-But I've got the flow.
-No, you don't!

Mom, Esteban's waiting
for a dance with you.

-Go.
-Baby...

-He wants to learn the move.
-Which move?

Well, that... turn, turn and tap, tap.

-Let's go!
-Okay.

That hurts more.

You look so cute together.

Armando.

We need to talk.

Sorry. I'm sorry, Freddy.
I thought I was hallucinating.

What's with the attire?
You look like Virgin Mary.

As the ex-ugly spins around,
does the handsome man put you down?

That's not the right path.

Who invited you? What are you doing here?

I come bearing gifts
from Mr. Pachito's daughters.

-From the hags?
-Yes, the ladies.

What could it be? So nice of them!

Baby, you probably don't know this,

but this is a vase from the Ming Dynasty.

Speaking of dynasty,
those are Mr. Pachito's ashes.

-What? Pachito's here?
-Yes, in there.

That's gross! Seriously?

Those wretches!

Marce! The hags
sent me some Pachito powder.

It's essential to refrain from being
influenced by the etymology of rage,

and to learn that in this world,
you learn nothing.

Freddy... Freddy!

You've been helpful to me
throughout my life,

so let me be helpful for once.

If you keep speaking to me
in that tone and manner,

I'll kick you into a psych ward!

What's Calderón doing here?

What is this butt-in doing here?

Calderón, you're not welcome
to this meeting.

So, please, step back out
the way you came in.

Nice to see you all, too.

Long live the newlyweds!

I'd love to oblige,

but my job description says otherwise.

What is it?

Calderón, is your head
malfunctioning because of your age,

or did you just forget
that you no longer work here?

Fired?

As Ecomoda's CEO,

I'll no longer need
your services, Mr. Calderón.

I gave you a chance that you didn't take.

And you have proven

to be an employee who brings
zero value to this company.

It's true, Betty.

You gave me the opportunity
to work as a janitor.

But let me remind you,
I'm here under Armando's instructions.

And let me remind you that I'm the CEO.

I have the power to make these decisions.

Would you like it in writing?

A manual on how to seduce ugly women?

I see. This is personal.

Betty, you're an intelligent woman.

Not emotionally intelligent, though.

Otherwise, you wouldn't have
held onto a grudge for over twenty years.

I don't have to explain myself.

You'll receive your severance
as per legal requirements.

Now, if you'll please excuse us.

Yes, right. Let me remind you
that fortune is fickle and changeable,

and good things come to those who wait.

I'm well aware of that.

By the way, I'm working

here and now. Not for you, though.

Let me use this opportunity
to introduce my new bosses.

Here they are.
Please, give them a round of applause.

The three of them together.
Why am I not surprised?

-Pascual, you got here early.
-What's up, bro?

Ecomoda's unemployed employees,
please leave us.

We have an emergency meeting.

Trust me, you don't want to stick around.

What do you mean? It's my wedding.

Baby, tell them.

You've been notified.

You've been summoned.
You must've forgotten while celebrating...

love.

Mr. Pascual, you're on our side.
Come with us.

Remember?

Talk soon.

-Baby, say something!
-Well... I mean...

Who exactly has been summoned?

The Board of Directors, shareholders,
and the union representative.

What?

The whole company, during a wedding?

Does that sound normal to you?

Is it normal to have a wedding
at a company that's about to go bankrupt?

-What?
-No! What?

Conference room, now.

Wait. This is to remember me.

Okay, make it brief, please.

-Yes.
-Today is a very special day.

I fully agree with my CEO, Betty.

It's a very special day. Oh, sorry.

That's adorable.

As a lawyer, I think you have everything
here but reasons to party.

For instance, is this gentleman aware

that the prosecutor in Armando's case

is about to bring charges?

And furthermore,

that the Superintendency is moving forward
with Ecomoda's restructuring?

-Hey, unbelievable. Unbel...
-Silence!

Unbelievable.

The party was going great.

And now they're in a meeting?

I don't understand a word they're saying.

We're in a crisis, Bertha.

This company is closer to liquidation
than anything else.

And the attorney can confirm it.

But this comes as no surprise, everyone.

Ecomoda has been on the edge for months.

The CEO warned us about it.
We all saw it coming.

Right, but what's the rush?

There's no need
to run towards the edge, is there?

We all agree that to avoid the debacle,

we need to avoid liquidation.

So, we're choosing
between the edge and Hell.

You always have
very convenient suggestions, Calderón.

Hey!

Quit gossiping and have some cake.

Well, fake blonde,
let me tell you something.

Between cake and gossip...

I choose gossip.

With some whiskey, thanks.

I had the goodwill to invite you,
and this is how you repay me?

What we need to do is inject
some serious capital into Ecomoda.

Capital to pay debts, fines,

and, above all, the employees,

who aren't responsible for any of this.

Where would we get capital from?

I have it.

Right, Pascual?

Pascual?

TEAM
"THE NACHOS"

Right. Without a doubt.
What has to be done?

-How much? Tell me.
-Before we talk numbers...

Losing the company is not an option,
is that clear?

Armando, we all want to save Ecomoda.

So let's agree on prioritizing
the common good over self-interest.

What does this mean?

You will sell your shares

and lose your stake.

We have the buyers, him and Pascual.

Between all of us here,
we'll save Ecomoda.

What?

It's a very special day.

Betty's right.

Hello. Excuse me.

Is Mr. Hugo Lombardi here?

What?

Is that the boyfriend?

-What's going on?
-He's got unusual taste.

He's got a lot of problems,
but that's not one of them.

Right now, taking Ecomoda's
current state of affairs into account,

this is our top priority,
and I say this from experience.

That's right. So what say you?

Will you let me save Ecomoda?

Save it from what? No, man.

This is a trap, not salvation.

From you, for example.

We'd lose our rights over Ecomoda.

I don't know why
you're concerned, Marcela.

You brought Nacho here
so he could control Ecomoda.

-Am I wrong?
-No, but there was a price to pay.

I oppose, too.

-We need to think it through.
-Mom.

What's left to think about?

Betty, you know it's the only way
to keep Ecomoda from disappearing,

to pay your debts,

and most importantly,
to pay your employees.

-Mom.
-Right. I know that very well.

-But we need to assess this.
-Assess what?

Tell me, what is there
to assess, to think about?

I'm sorry, but quoting my grandpa, TDIAP.

What?

The Devil is a pig.

I see.

CEO Betty, we'll think about this.

Can I get back to my wedding?

Shame on you.

-And you.
-Please, give us a day.

To digest all this
and come back with an answer.

Okay, if that was too heavy
and you need to digest it,

you have 24 hours to think about it.

If Superintendency
doesn't decide first, that is,

because in that case,
there's nothing we can do.

-Beatriz, the ball is in your court.
-Yes.

Our side stands firm.

You can join us,
or the employees get nothing.

Gutiérrez, you look like a puppet,
peeking out. What do you want?

Excuse me, my President.

Madame president, Mrs. Majo,
ladies and gentlemen.

Mr. Hugo, there's a man looking for you.

-What?
-Yes, looking for you. From the bank.

-What?
-Yes, correct. From the bank.

Which bank? Is he here?

He's here, yes.

I can't do this. They're driving me crazy.

Not only are they harassing me
on the phone every day,

asking me if I want
to increase my platinum card limit,

but they've actually showed up in person.

They'll hear me now.

Here. Suck it down. Save me some.

Where is he?

-Are you with the bank?
-Yes, sir.

-Look, I'm here to...
-Come with me, mustached child.

-It's not the boyfriend.
-That way.

FOR SALE
FOR RENT

How dare you come to my office
to collect like some loan shark?

You might as well handcuff and jail me,

like some motel TV.

Mr. Lombardi, the last thing I want
is to ruin your reputation.

But you forced me to come here
when you stopped answering our calls,

reported our emails as spam
and our social media as fake.

That's what you get for being annoying.

Your call center is obnoxious.

No, don't worry! No one is
going to end up on the streets.

Can you imagine how much
my grandma Inesita would be suffering?

Forgive me, but excuse me.

My cutie patootie!

What now? Is my Cricket back?

Do not belittle me or compare me to a bug.

-A bug?
-He might just defy gravity.

The gravity of your comment is serious.

Truth be told,
I'd rather continue my soul searching,

my search for my deeply-hidden self,

but given the circumstances,
here I am, here I'll stay,

keeping our former president
and former ugly one company.

I can't believe this Illuminati!

-Hey, you really...
-Watch out!

I like the new version of you
that came here.

So delicious, so tasty.

Beggars can't be choosers, you know.

You know what? I don't need money.

-I don't need to work ever again.
-Come here.

Never again.

But I will tell Betty to make me
a part of the company, whatever it takes.

Look, Mr. Lombardi, I came all this way
to give you a fair warning.

The Legal Collection Department
has several ways of making people pay.

My advice is to pay off your debts.

Or you might just lose...

your house, your car,

your fancy designs...

Here you go.
Have a nice day, Mr. Lombardi.

There's no need to be like this.
Come back here.

Thank you for increasing my credit limit.

You're wearing that
to seduce me, aren't you?

You almost didn't make it.

Good evening.

Good evening, Betty.

I've been thinking about what's coming
with this deal of the two sides.

They are Team Nachos.

What about us? What are we?

Is the name really important?

Because we could be
the Betty Boom, the Betty Poom,

or the Betty Team.

Do you spend time with the lawyer
thinking about the name?

-Armando!
-Amazing, Betty.

He's helping me come up
with a strategy, an answer.

All that is fine,

but don't you think this lawyer thing
has gone on for too long?

I think we're forgetting
about rule number three.

Ours is a casual relationship,
free of jealousy,

but to you it's a "causal" relationship,
causing jealousy.

No, I'm sorry.

I signed that agreement,
I read it, I know what it's about,

but you need to understand me.

I just want to run
around the city and scream,

"I love Betty. We're together."

PLEASE
DO NOT DISTURB

The newlyweds are here!

Get down, Pati. I have a bad groin.

Don't open your eyes.

-Okay.
-Keep walking, keep going.

-Okay.
-Very well.

Here. Open your eyes!

Isn't this amazing?

Well...

I expected our wedding suite to be nicer,

more special.

But, Pati, this is special. Look.

There's champagne.

Champagne! We could do it
like in the movies...

And then we take a bath,

get drunk on each other's bodies.

How dare you, Nicolás?

Nothing's happening tonight.

Darling, we can't risk Mila finding out.

If she finds out we're doing this,

she'll hang me.

If you die, I can bring you back.

Then, like in a fairy tale,
you'll die in my arms once again,

and I'll bring you right back.

You know?

I have a souvenir of yours
that you left here.

Naughty girl.

That's so embarrassing.

-No one noticed, right?
-No one.

Besides, I was the only one who saw it,

because I took it off.

Let me remind you
that this is a high-risk pregnancy.

I told you, I warned you.

I mean, it's all your fault.

I told you, "Even if menopause
is breathing down my neck, Nicolás,

we need to be safe." And what did you say?

"Everything will be okay, Pati."

Pati, we can play around.

Our baby comes first.

Pati...

I know, I get it. Look...

I can adapt.
I can lay where you tell me to.

But you and...

your skin, your body, your scent...

You're selfish, aren't you?

You only think about yourself.

Here's Pachito,

and it'd be a deadly sin
to do it in front of Pachito.

Pachito is nothing but dust!

Listen to me.

Baby, do not screw him, do screw me.

I'm so upset.

If we take Nacho's offer...

No. What do you mean, Betty?

If we take that offer, I lose Ecomoda.

I can't let that happen.

But we can't make the employees pay
for a decision they didn't make.

-They're not to blame.
-I see where this is going.

I don't know what to think or what to say.

Do you trust me?

Because I'm putting my life
on the line for this.

Betty La Fea, The Story Continues