26x02 - Danas, Derrieres, and Drama

[bunniefuu]

- Previously onthe real world...

- Hello?

- Wow. - A pool! Aah!

- Hey! - Oh, we got more roommates.

- Cheers to three months! Let's do this!

- Who do you think is the hottest?

- You don't even have to answer.

- Zach's really hot. - Obviously.

[Cheering] - what's up!

- We only have one with a boyfriend, then.

You live together?

I really don't like that alexandra's not single.

I don't want her boyfriend to hold her back.

- Frank is interested in me as more than a friend.

I have no intentions of hooking up with anybody.

- It's cool.

- This is the true story...

- Of seven strangers... - Greatest idea ever!

- Picked to live in a house...

- Don't tell me what to do!

- Work together... And have their lives taped.

- The house is on fire!

- To find out what happens...

- You guys are so gross. - Wow!

- When people stop being polite...

- Make your move. I'm gonna explode.

- And start getting real.

-The real world. - San diego!

[Laughter]

[Surf music]

♪

- I'm from san diego,

But I've never surfed once in my life.

- You guys are gonna jump on the boards.

You guys are gonna lie down nice and flat.

You're gonna push up, one foot after the other.

Like that. Okay? - Okay.

- Just like that. You know, easy, right?

- The best part of surfing is the that wet suit

Makes my a*s look good. How do you paddle?

- I have never surfed before. I'm a little bit nervous.

I've never really done anything that I haven't been good at.

- Good. Let's go. [Laughs]

- Whoo!

- I'm not a surfer, and completely suck a*s

At all water sports.

- [Laughs]

- Whoo! - Oh, sam's up.

- I rode a wave in like a model.

Best style award.

- I really want to do this all the time.

- I know.

- And then, when I go back to l.a., Like, do it too.

I don't know why I've never even...

- That was really cool.

- Surfing is one of those things that I can look back and say

I did it for the jacuzzi after.

That was the immediate gratification.

- Whoa, it's hot.

- Yeah. - Jeez!

[Phone line ringing] - hello?

- Carter? - What up?

- This is zach. - Hey, what's goin on, dude?

- I've been here for three days,

And I feel like I've been here for, like,

A month already, dude.

I'm going absolutely bat [bleep] crazy.

There's a girl, the -year-old--

She's got fake yabos.

So, like, that never hurts the situation.

Then there's a girl from zimbabwe,

And she's, like, the most down-to-earth,

Calm girl I've ever met in my life.

Ashley's the girl that's got--

You know, she's good-looking.

She's got all the utensils, you know, to be a hot girl.

She is actually, like, a genuinely, like, awesome person.

- Yeah, yeah. - There's a kid named frank.

And I just found out yesterday that he's bisexual.

Of course, like, you know me, I've been dropping, like--

You know, saying, like, "h*m*" and "g*y,"

Like, the whole time, you know.

Nate's the nuclear engineer, dude.

He doesn't, like-- he literally has no filter.

- Eww! He's peeing.

- My roommate, the one I'm sharing a room with,

Is, uh-- her name's sam.

- I haven't had sex with a guy in over three years.

- Um, yeah. I mean, she likes chicks.

[Laughter] I love this place.

- Me and zach came out on the balcony,

And I looked down and saw three girls,

And I was thinking, "yeah, chicks!"

When did you lose your virginity?

- I was a sophomore. How old were you?

- . - , .

- Is that young? - No, it's...i mean--

- I don't want to just go and, like, sleep with anybody.

Or if I've been with them a month or two--i don't know.

I get super vulnerable.

If I'm gonna sleep with somebody...

- That's--that's-- me too.

Like, I get super vulnerable. - And I don't like that.

- There's always those people that are, like,

That's the only mission that they're on

Is to sleep with you.

- I am, like, the hopeless romantic type.

So if I fall for someone, ifallfor someone.

Like, hardcore.

[Laughter]

- Priscilla, you getting down on my face routine today

Or what?

- Okay. - Oh, my god.

- Okay... - This is invigorating.

- Ah.

- This is pineapple enzyme

Facial cleanser.

- How minty fresh.

- Next, you use the blackhead eliminator.

- Zach has more facial product than I do.

- Okay, now this... This is my deepest

Facial secret.

I'm a closet facial guy.

Only got one face, you gotta keep it nice.

That's very crucial.

I can't tell you. - But it burns.

- It burns.

- Yes, it's emulsifying impurities.

- So the more it burns, the more impure you are?

- Yes. It doesn't even burn my face.

- Fail!

- It doesn't burn my face whatsoever.

- I love that zach has this side of him

That's kind of girly in a way.

He's our little prima donna of the house.

[Laughter]

- Do you remember our conversation?

- I don't. I-- - at all?

- No.

- Did you have a lot to drink?

- I got drunk. I was very drunk.

I'm sorry. - It's okay.

- I'm--i get--i'm a little-- I'm very possessive.

- I almost cried. - I'm sorry.

I'm not trying to put you out like that.

- How's your relationship with your parents?

- Not very good. I mean, we used to, like, fight.

Like, fight. Like, physically fight.

I would fight my dad. And it's, like, "we love you."

Like, "we want you to be with somebody you want."

And then, two weeks ago, my dad called me a f*gg*t

And told me to get the [bleep] out of his house.

- Is that part of why you got upset yesterday?

- Of course. - Did it remind you of--

- Also, that word is never gonna be okay.

It's, like, a*usive. And it's stupid.

And I don't want to be on either end of that.

- Hasn't everybody, though? You know, it's human.

- Okay, well, I want out. I want out.

I don't want to be a part of it anymore.

I'm sick of it.

- The only way to get out is

To cut yourself off, you know?

Like cold turkey.

And it's hard as heck, but if there's a--

This is the best time possible for you to do that.

- I say mean things and, like, I say hurtful things,

But I've never said to my family

That I never want to see them again

Or to get the [bleep] out of my life.

It's just, especially coming from a parent,

That's--that's a lot to take in, so...

- Dude, it's a beach. Where are all the chicks?

- It's monday. It's :.

- Being single here in san diego,

I'm just trying to hit on girls. I gotta flirt.

Why not? - They were probably .

- Well, I mean, she was with a moose, though, so...

- [Laughs] yeah!

- My type of chick is pretty mainstream--

Blonde hair, blue eyes, straight teeth,

And huge t & a.

Oh... - Hello.

- Those hips could bear my child.

- [Laughs]

- I'm just picking up chicks with sam,

And that's totally cool, like I got a wingman.

Well, what are you guys doing tonight?

- [Laughs] - I don't mean to upset nate.

Yes, I'm supposed to be his wingman, but...

Let me get your phone number.

Sometimes you just gotta take 'em all for you, you know?

All right, --, I got it. - Cool.

- Sam doesn't have more game than me.

Let's get that one straight.

We gotta find actual hot chicks.

- Well, I found one of three.

Out of four, I got one. - Come on.

- You gotta spit your game.

And he obviously didn't spit hard enough.

- When are these dudes gonna get back from the gym?

- I don't know.

- Hand me the talkie. I want to play with him.

- You know how to do 'em, right? - No.

- We have these alarm clocks

That nobody knows how to work, except for me.

Look. - Huh?

- [Clock voice] warning.

Are you sure this is your bed?

- I find out that you can record your own alarm, and...

[Clears throat]

[Beep]

- Scrilla, ashley, xan!

- Aah! Gotcha!

Both: b*tches.

- Sam and I decided to initiate prank w*r .

We gotta go plant it. - We have to hide it somewhere.

- Like, in the ceiling.

We are going to place seven time bombs

In the girls' room.

[Beep] wake up!

[Recorded voice] wake up!

[Laughter]

- This is awesome!

- [Recorded voice] wake up!

It's funny every time!

- Come find me.

- This is the last one! We promise!

Both: we lied! Ha ha ha ha ha!

[All recorded messages playing at once]

Oh, my god!

- Yeah, put it down there.

- Yep.

- Oh! :. - Yep.

- Good night. - Good night.

- [Laughing] I can't wait till :.

- This is gonna be amazing.

- [Chuckles]

I can't wait.

I totally feel like it's christmas morning.

It's gonna be right by her face.

It's gonna scare the [bleep] out of her.

- [Recorded voices] scrilla, ashley, xan!

Aah! Gotcha, b*tches!

Scrilla, ashley, xan! Aah! Gotcha, b*tches.

[Muffled laughter]

- Scrilla, ashley, xan! Aah! Gotcha, b*tches.

- Where is that? [Multiple messages playing]

[Muffled laughter]

- Oh, my g-- yes!

- I don't know how to turn it off.

- Scrilla, ashley, xan! Aah! Gotcha, b*tches.

- Oh, my god, it's really loud.

- We find clocks in our vents...

[Messages continue] under the bed,

In the closet.

- Where is that thing?

[Messages repeat]

- I'm ready to k*ll somebody.

- Gotcha, b*tches!

[Muffled laughter]

- The greatest day of my life so far.

- I want those things off.

[Messages continue]

- Did you hear all all the alarm clocks going off?

- Did you put those clocks in our room?

Honest to god, did you?

- How pissed off did you guys get?

- You guys stuffed one in the vent.

They went off-- six clocks went off

For, like, an hour straight.

- I was thinking in my head maybe another hour of sleep,

And I would be up beating their asses right now.

- [Laughs]

- Here, do you want me to help you?

- This shirt's just gonna be really tight.

- Roll out!

- ♪ It's getting hotter

♪ Undercover

- Are we there? - Yeah.

- Bye.

- ♪ I'm seeing colors

♪ I'm seeing colors

♪ The way your body moves

♪

♪ Whoa

♪ Whoa

♪

♪ Whoa

♪ Whoa

- Yeah!

- This guy's gonna buy us a shot.

- Whoo!

- I meet this hot blonde chick named dana at the club.

Okay, well, that's fine.

I come up with the idea, you know,

Let's go do a little romantic walk on the beach.

- [Laughs] - would you quit worrying?

- Oh, you have really pretty blue eyes.

- Thank you, sweetheart.

- Make out!

- Kiss! Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!

- Oh... This'll be a bad idea.

Or a great one.

Are you cold?

Would you like my button-up, I guess?

- Here, it's called a flannel.

- No, it's called a button-up. - It's called a flannel.

- You're a flannel.

- Get it? Got it?

- Yes, ma'am. - I got it.

Aww, thanks.

- Check out my socks. How awesome are those?

You are so jealous. - [Laughs]

Have you been surfing? - We actually--

We're taking a class.

- Are you? - Yeah.

- I could show you how to surf.

- You can surf? - Yes, I can surf.

- Oh, that just made you so much hotter.

Oh, meet thor.

- Thor, hi, I'm dana. - Nice to meet you.

I'm zach. Nice to meet you.

- I'm digging dana because she's a surfer chick

And she's hot, she's cool, she's genuine.

This whole past ten minutes was amazing, are you kidding me?

There's something to pursue.

- Yes. - Mm-hmm.

And then we're gonna go to the beach.

- Mm-hmm.

- And then...

- ♪ Oh, you've taken my heart

♪ Taken my heart, taken my heart ♪

♪ Taken my heart

♪ You've taken my heart, taken my heart ♪

♪ Taken my heart

- Dude, we, like, walked on the beach and everything.

- No, you didn't. - Swear, dude.

- You walked-- you walked on the beach?

- We walked on the beach.

- And you just, like, made out with her on the beach?

- On the beach, in the street.

- Was her name, like, crystal? - Dana.

I nicknamed dana "baby blue"

Because she's got these amazing crystal baby-blue eyes.

I mean, they're astonishing.

She is, honestly, like, one of the best kissers

I've ever been with.

- I love you. - I love you too.

- What are you up to? Where you headed?

- I'm going to work. How are you holding up?

- Good. I'm having a really good time.

- Mm-hmm. - Yeah.

- Yeah. - How are you feeling?

- Oh, not so good.

This, like--thisawaything is starting to wear on me.

- I'm sorry. - Yeah, it's really--

It's really starting to get to me.

- I really miss you.

I feel like a really bad girlfriend.

I feel like I'm doing something wrong

Anytime I hear him unhappy.

And I feel guilty, you know,

'Cause I feel like i-- I put us in this, but...

- Why do you feel guilty?

- Because you feel bad.

And I feel bad that you feel bad, baby.

I feel like being here is really hurting my relationship.

- I have to go-- I have to go to work.

I love you, and I'll talk to you later, okay?

Bye. - Bye.

He's not in, like, the best of moods right now.

- Why? - Just 'cause he misses me.

Like, you know, he's always saying

"This is so much harder for me,

Like, than it is for you."

- Are you partaking that this sucks too?

Like, does this suck for you?

- No, um-- no, not at all.

I'm having an amazing time. - Yeah.

- I feel like every conversation we've had

In the past couple days--

It just hasn't been as, like, positive

As I'd like for it to be, you know?

- Yeah. Alex is already talking about reasons why

They could break up.

I don't think that I'm gonna have to step in, even.

- It's really, really, really important to me

That he and I make it work through this.

- Nate's gonna go on his date.

- I love that he's going on a date.

- Nate's all dressed up too. He looks really cute.

- I feel like you're my dad.

You gonna take me to my date?

Zach, he's gonna drive me to my little date.

I can't wait to hang out with dana again.

- Am I picking you up too? - Yeah.

I want to really get to know her and see how things go.

- So how's your morning going?

- It's good, actually.

You look astonishing.

- Aww, thanks. [Laughs]

So what are your friends doing today?

What?

- Nothing.

[Laughs]

- Hey.

- Wow, look at your blue eyes.

- Why are you cracking up?

- I'm just awkward and weird.

Unbeknownst to me,

Zach had an idea of how to [bleep] this up for me.

- What is wrong with you?

Is it because you're not drunk?

You can't have a normal conversation?

- This is way too hard. - What?

- Nothing.

So how's your day? I'm trying, damn it!

- Hey. - Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Oh, [bleep]!

- That was horrible.

- I just want to let him know gimme a call.

- Thanks for the ride. - Oh, my god.

- Sorry. Did that get really awkward for you?

- Yeah. I was, like, what's going on right now?

- Sorry. Everybody was, like, "are you nervous for your date?"

I was, like, "I hung out with her last night."

No [bleep] way!

What else do you do for fun?

- I come to the beach with guys I don't know...

That I just met the night before.

Yellow socks today. What's up with you?

- Did you see my pink ones? - No.

I saw your green ones last night.

- Did you enjoy 'em? - I really enjoyed them.

- Absolutely, dude.

I'm having a blast with dana.

I can honestly see myself falling for her.

It's pretty surreal.

- ♪ I found you

- Coming up on the real world...

- Girl, your a*s is, like, the topic of conversation.

I want to, like, grab it with my hands.

- Yeah, [bleep] you.

Come on, man, calm! Awesome. Awesome!

- ♪ Whoo whoo, whoo whoo ♪

♪ Whoo whoo

- ,... - Oh, yeah.

[Laughs] - [grunting]

- Oh, yeah.

- Oh, that mirror looks awesome. Oh, yeah.

[Laughter]

- When it comes to guys in general with me,

It's always physical attraction first.

And, of course, zach is good-looking.

- Jump up there. - Yeah, get on there.

- Jump up there. - Where do I stand?

- See that?

- [Laughs] - get on.

- Hold on, hold on.

- Oh, god! - Are you ready?

- Yeah. You're like a beast.

- Yeah, he's, like, the strongest kid

I've ever worked out with.

- I know zach wants to fondle ashley,

But he's gonna lie to himself

And say he doesn't want to do it.

- Wanna use my ipod?

- Yes. - Okay.

- Three.

- She's got all rap. It's tight.

- Really? - Yeah.

It's, like, all hip-hop. Sex music.

She gave me her ipod, and it's gotdo me dirty.

Or something like that. - [Laughs]

- She just got done walking around in booty shorts.

I just gotta keep thinking cold shower.

[Ringtone chiming] - who's ringing?

- Baby blue. - Oh, yeah? Is it baby blue?

- Oh, hey there.

So did you think of where

You want to go tomorrow or what?

- Ask her if she has-- - oh, my god!

- Ask her if she has a chubby friend.

- And do you have, like, a really fat friend

So that thor can go on a double date with us?

- Oh, my god, y'all.

- Oh, good call.

She said, "I only have hot friends, sorry."

- Alex. - What?

Yeah, he's coming tonight. We're gonna write some music.

I'm excited. I'm so happy.

Music is the love of my life.

It's been so long since I've worked on mus--

Not so long, but I haven't really done any

Since I got here, so...

- I've been writing songs for a long time,

But this is the first time I'm gonna be sharing my music

With anybody.

- So he's gonna, like, do the guitar strumming,

And you're gonna be the triangle tapping and singing?

- Yeah, I'm gonna play the triangle and hum along.

[Laughter]

This will fit you.

I really think booty shorts will make your butt,

You know, like, hot.

- You can wear pink or blue. There's pink, too.

- Do they fit?

[Laughter]

- Awesome! - What a shot!

- Zach's a*s shape, you want to squeeze it.

I want to, like, grab it with my hands.

- Are those actually yours? - No, those are ashley's.

- I like it. - [Laughs]

- He has my shorts on.

- Those are shorts? - Those are not shorts.

- Yeah, those are my booty shorts.

- Ashley's version of shorts

Are something that her whole butt hangs out of.

- But that's not like--

- If half of the butt cheek is covered,

It's a pant. - [Laughs]

- These are pants.

- What about you? What are you wearing tonight?

- This.

I totally asked dana out again.

- You look like the largest seventh-grader

That ever lived. - Yeah.

And that's what's gonna happen too.

I'm gonna seventh grade the [bleep] out of this date.

I'm expecting this thing to be a blast.

[Telephone line ringing]

- Hello?

- Oh, hey. - Hey.

- Are you serious?

- No. - Why not?

Sorry. - All right.

- Well, have a good night.

- All right, you too, sweetheart.

[Bleep] b*tch!

- What happened?

- Aw, dumb [bleep] cancelled.

You know, it's a shock to the heart.

I was digging her, and I got shut down.

And that sucks.

- Okay, nate, this girl's gone now.

- Absolutely.

I'm pissed.

- Nate comes in and tells me

That dana has cancelled, and he honestly looks like

His dog has just died.

- Not even cool. Did not want that.

I'm over it.

You missed, damn it!

- Moondoggie's about to go down.

- I'm a nuclear engineer.

- Nate just needs blonde hair, big boobs right now.

Within ten minutes, nate is at another table

Full of girls,

One of which is blonde.

My name's nate.

This dana isn't near as cool as the first one.

She's not as hot.

But you know, it could turn into something.

I mean, she's still decent, you know.

Girls: nate! Nate! Nate! Nate! Nate...

- Oh, my god. I love it!

- So what are you ladies doing this evening?

- You know what, I have tomorrow off.

- Think about this.

I got dissed on a date tonight

By a girl nameddana!

- [Gasps]

- Is that why you said "that's convenient"?

- Oh!

All: oh...

- Shot in the heart.

All: whoa! - Thanks a lot, dana!

[Knock at door]

- Hello. - Hey.

- I've been dying to make music for a while.

- It's time.

- Freestyle. [Laughs]

Okay, so the song is calleddagger,

And the words are, like,

"Gimme everything that you've got."

It's really demanding.

[Vocalizing melody]

It's really upbeat, and you want to make sure

You hit the down beat, so it goes like--

[Vocalizing melody]

Yeah, yeah. ♪ Da da da

And a little fast-- it's pretty fast.

And I think what you should do

Is something like-- almost like dance music.

Even though it's folk. - Right.

- [Vocalizing melody]

[Guitar playing melody]

- Yeah! That's awesome.

And then the first part would start out muted.

[Playing muted intro]

A little faster.

♪ I am just a beggar who'll

♪ Accept anything I can get ♪

♪ And if I must I'll steal the rest ♪

♪ It's true

That was cool.

♪ So you can have your heart

♪ Or I can smash it in the dark ♪

♪ But either way I'm getting all of you ♪

And then b opens a little.

♪ Gimme everything that you've got ♪

I am just so happy to be making music again.

And it just gives me this energy

To be doing something that feels like me.

♪ Tell me to stop

Then open. ♪ Yay ay ay

♪ Ay ay ay

♪ Ay ay ay ay yeah.

- I'm blown away by alex every day,

And then she sings, and she just

Knocks me down again.

- ♪ I used to have a better name ♪

♪ Until I gave myself away ♪

♪ And clearly I gained nothing in return ♪

♪ Gimme everything that you've got ♪

- [Chorus] ♪ gimme everything that you've got ♪

- ♪ Gimme every piece of your heart ♪

- [Chorus] ♪ gimme every piece of your heart ♪

- ♪ Gimme everything that I want ♪

♪ And don't ever tell me to stoo-oo-op ♪

♪ Yay ay ay

♪ Ay ay ay

♪ Ay ay ay ay

♪ Yay ay ay

♪ Ay ay ay

♪ Ay ay ay ay

We're all over the place right now,

But we're just learning.

- That's awesome! - Oh, thank you.

- That totally just, like, lightened my night.

Totally lightened my night. - Really? Thank you.

When are you guys going out?

Are you coming with us, or you staying?

- Where's nate at?

- Okay, you break. - How do we play?

No, you break. - Wait, how do we play?

- Oh, stop it.

- I'm just making fun of your "stop."

Yeah, I put that together.

Clearly she's got a little pterodactyl in her,

And that's completely cool.

- Nice catch. Good hands.

So are we going to this -or-older club or what?

- Is nate here yet?

- Hey, I really don't care. I don't need a whole rack.

Clearly I'm talking to you, so it's--no reaction!

- I ignored it. It just was not funny.

- Yes, itwas. - No.

- Nate's gonna want to bring that girl, right?

When he finds a girl, he's all about her

The rest of the night,

Crossing his fingers that he gets laid.

- I mean, we can politely just agree

That we're gonna hate each other.

- This is good cheese sauce.

- k*ll this. We gotta go.

- Do you want to see the house, or do you not?

- I don't care, whatever.

- [Imitating dana] I don't care, I don't care.

So I bring dana back to the house,

And I'm gonna lose my mind.

- Prissy, we ready?

- Wow. - Whoa, there she is.

- Finally I'm going out. - Let's go.

Let's go. - Shotgun.

- Driving. - Yay.

- Yo, nate! Oh.

- Hi. - Hi.

All right, you guys are good, nate?

There's nate, and he's telling me,

You know, let's get this girl out of here.

Um, all right.

Yes.

So dana . Is going to the bathroom.

- Hey. - Hey, how are you?

- Lights on, lights off.

Are you all good with that?

- So I gotta go.

- What? [Toilet flushes]

Get in the car.

You gotta get in the back

If you're gonna get in right now.

- Where's your--

Wait, what happened to that girl?

What happened to his girl?

- Holy-- what's going on?

- Nate's doing the dip.

- Wait, where's the girl? - She's in the house!

[Laughter]

- You guys...

[Laughter]

- Hey, nate, guess what. It turns out

Danas are not for you.

- ♪ We gonna party all night ♪

♪ Shop all day

- San diego!

- Tonight it's and over at on broadway,

So it's priscilla night.

- Oh, my god. [Laughter]

- Finally being out with all my friends,

It's exactly what I felt like I'd been missing.

- ♪ We gonna party all night

♪ Shop all day

♪ We gonna party all night

- Gotta get a stretch.

Ahh, surfing stretch.

[Laughter]

Oh, good stretch. Now I can surf.

I can surf the [bleep] out of this.

- It's gonna get gnarly out there today, bro.

- Oh, my god, those waves look so rough.

I don't even want to do that.

I'm hanging out for a while.

- Move over, girl. Can I sit with you?

- I bet we're gonna be, like, ready to go in,

And they're gonna be over it.

[Laughs] I love it.

- Aah!

- They're still going strong. - So we can chitchat.

- Yeah.

- You know, your a*s is, like, the topic of conversation.

- I walk around normal, like I always am,

And, like, it's the topic of conversation.

- I just think people see, like, ashley's hot,

But like, what else?

What about your relationship with zach?

- Is he, like, mytypetype?

- He's, like, everyone's type.

- Yeah, I know.

- Put you two together and it looks like--oh, my god!

- The homecoming king and queen. - Yeah, you know?

- I know, I just don't want anybody to get the wrong idea.

You know? - Uh-huh.

- I think zach and i, we're in the process

Of still figuring it out.

So why set expectations for others if we haven't even

Set them for ourselves yet.

Obviously there's attraction, you know what I mean?

But, like, neither one of us are thinking anything of it

At this point, you know?

- Aah!

- Should I go double windsor on this b*tch?

- Are you all ready? - Yeah.

- Ye-ah.

- I feel like this is fluxx. - Fluxx.

- Can you guys tell me what time to be back here?

- I would say come at, like, :.

- Yeah.

[Dance music]

♪

- Aw, yeah! - [Screams]

- I am disappointed alex is in a relationship.

But right now I'm going out and trying to get it in.

Welcome to my p*nis' problem.

- When frank drinks he gets upset.

Whatever is causing him to drink so much,

It's something that's really hurting him.

- What's up?

- Yo, frank's staying. He doesn't wanna leave.

So [bleep].

- Wait!

- I hate this.

Being rejected digs into me. I don't know how to react to it.

I don't.

Move the [bleep] over. - [Laughs]

- Move over.

- I thought you were getting in the back.

- No, I'm not--move over!

Seriously! - Ouch.

- As soon as frank starts drinking, the dragon comes out.

- Get in this car!

- Stop, stop.

I hate-- - hate who?

Us?

- I don't hate you guys. - Oh, who do you hate?

- Did I say "hate you?"

- No, all I heard was "I hate."

I'm just really confused by frank.

He's just, in his mind, making himself think that

People are against him rather than with him,

And that's never good.

- Frank, come on now. - Yeah.

I asked you why you are a sl*t?

- Oh, my god! - [Bleep] you, b*tch!

- Frank, you don't want people to fight with you,

Then stop talking!

- I'm an idiot? Are you serious, priscilla?

[Bleep] you! - Be cool, man! Calm!

Cool!

Stop. - Cool, yeah, it's all me.

It's all my [bleep] fault.

- No, no, no, no, no.

- Let's go talk, have a bro talk.

I've never, ever, ever, ever been someone where

People have, like, been disrespectful to me, ever.

- Are you saying that the females in the house

Are disregarding you as, like, a...

'Cause I think they all respect you,

I think they all give you plenty of respect.

- He just thinks that everyone's out to get him.

Especially when he drinks. - Yeah.

- His drunk self, like, it scares me.

- I think his drunk self is just ridiculous.

- What are you afraid of?

- Yeah, what is this all stemming from?

- I don't wanna be the odd man out.

- What do you mean, "odd man out"?

- It's very, very easy to disregard somebody

Who doesn't give a [bleep] about their sexuality.

It is.

- Can you blame me for being offended right there?

- Yeah, it is kind of offensive

Because, like, I don't care about that.

- I'm freaked out by your sexuality,

Like, I'm for real freaked out.

- Yeah.

- But you know I've respected you from day one.

The day I showed up... Loved you.

You know we're on your side.

- It's all right.

- What is he going through?

Like, what is he trying to deal with?

- I just see someone who is in a lot of pain,

And I think it's absolutely worth talking to him, though.

- We have to.

If it doesn't change, it's going to get a lot worse.

- I could see it escalating,

Like, I think this is the beginning.

- So is everyone going to talk to frank today or what?

What he said to me was wrong.

- Fair enough. - You had to jump on top of him.

I mean, I think everyone in the house is willing

To figure out where he's coming from,

But I'm not gonna write it off 'cause he was drunk.

That's the only thing.

- I mean, you guys won't, I will.

[Chuckles]

- You're gonna have a rough summer.

- Hi. Do you want bacon or eggs?

- Yeah. - Okay.

- Smells so good.

- Ugh.

- It's pretty apparent that things are different.

'Cause the feeling is in the air and it is so thick.

And I'm really uncomfortable.

[Dishes breaking]

- You know what?

If you're angry, take it out on something else

Besides our dishes.

- You wanna know what I honestly think?

Promise you won't be mad at me? - Yeah.

- 'Cause I'm telling you, like, as your friend

Because I care about you.

- I don't--heh.

I don't get upset that easy. - Yeah.

I causes concern when you-- when you drink that much.

And sometimes people say stuff to you,

And you assume that they're saying something horrible

When they're not.

- Hm.

- I know we've talked about people loving you and whatnot.

I think you need to realize, people do love you.

Like, people really care about you.

And I feel like if you're always on the defense,

You're never gonna let anybody in.

- Yeah, I know.

I know.

- Are you good? - It just--yeah, I'm good.

It's just because, like, even my parents, like,

They say they love me and then...i don't know.

It's just a lot easier to be defensive

Because that way you don't get hurt.

When I was drunk, I had no intention

Of hurting anybody.

It's my responsibility to have to sit everybody down,

But it isn't easy to find the right words

In this situation.

Can I get a -- can I get a sit-down?

Seriously, I wanna make a statement--i do, I do.

I've never, ever, ever been the antagonist,

And I'm not trying to be.

At all.

I'm not a fighter. I'm really not.

I don't let people in. I don't.

Because I've been really [bleep] over by my parents.

- I can tell that frank's relationship with his parents

Is really hurting him and is a source

For a lot of his pain.

- And you being vulnerable right now

Is only gonna bring you closer to us.

- You guys really are my family. I really don't have a family.

I don't.

[Cries]

Like, a week before I came here,

My dad called me a f*gg*t and told me to get the [bleep]

Out of the house.

And, like, do you know how much that hurt?

[Cries]

Words do matter.

They do.

And I did say "b*tch" and "wh*re",

And I apologize for that.

It's just a defense mechanism because I don't know how to--

I don't know how to trust people because

If your own parents [bleep] you over,

Who the [bleep] are you supposed to trust?

- It takes moments like this and it takes this vulnerability

For you to force yourself to get past it.

It's hard when you find yourself completely helpless.

And I feel for frank.

- I'm so sorry.

I really am.

[Cries]

- There's very few reasons why a man should cry.

And this is not one of them.

- I hate it when people talk about feelings.

- Yeah.

Yeah, I'm kind of that same way, too.

- Do I look like the kind of person that would--

- Do I look like the kind of person--

- No, no. - Like, what the [bleep]?

He's reaching out. He's desperately reaching out.

I don't know what to say.

- I don't wanna deal with him when he's on his period.

You know, and pull his-- - every night, dude, like...

- Self-destructive.

- This is gonna be an interesting ride.

[Laughs]

- Does anyone have a flannel button-up I can borrow?

- Tonight we're going to double deuce,

It's a country-western bar,

And it's a little bit more my style.

Cowboy boots and a button-up.

- Can I wear this?

- Both. - Yes, and yes.

- Ugh!

- Goin' to a hoe-down. - I'm gonna hoe you down.

- Sounds fun.

- What?

- I should?

- No, how do you do it?

- Regarding ashley and I hooking up,

Never say never.

- Go to your left...

Now I go back.

- As soon as you say never,

You never know what's gonna happen.

- ♪ You want it

♪ You want it, come get your ride ♪

♪ Come get your ride

♪ Let's see how fun it can be to be alive ♪

♪ Come inside

♪ And baby, get your ride ♪

- Go like this and back, then you go back.

- You do?

- You are such an amazing dancer!

He's hot.

He's just big and he's buff. Aah!

I'm not drinking tequila around him, that's for damn sure.

- Gimme one more!

- Can you dip?

[Laughs]

You're good! You got it!

Captioning bycaptionmax www.captionmax.com

- Next onthe real world...

- We're going to the g*y bar.

You in? It's g*y and lesbians.

- I'm gonna have sex tonight.

- He's gonna have sex tonight. [Laughs]

Don't do it when I'm around.

- Hi, I'm having sex.

- I can't live with a dude that does dudes.

- What if it's a girl, though? - Then that's okay.

It's a double standard, but--

- It is an absolute double standard.

- I trusted you, man. [Glass shattering]

Shove it!

- I was secretly just trying to watch you two bang.

You and ashley. - No way.

- Just never gonna happen?

- I don't think so. - Really?

- Really? - You don't want it, or what?

- Well, I don't know.

I don't think-- that's not my style.

- She looks hot naked.

- I saw her boobies yesterday. - I saw her in the shower.

And I was, like, "hi, I'm nate, how you doing?"

- Trust me, she knew what she was doing.

She knew what she was doing. - Yeah.

- She, like, had, like, her undies on and she's, like,

Oh, sh**t.

- [Laughs] - oh, sh**t!

- I was like, "you didn't even pick anything up.

- [Laughs] - yes, I did.

- Oh, sh**t. - [Laughs]

- I'm so pumped.

- I'm so pumped.