02x18 - Profiles in Courage

[bunniefuu]

Morning, Mr. Needles.
Morning, Max.

Morning, kid I don´t know.

Hi, i´m Allison.

Hi, i´m George.

Since when did Max start
hanging out with girls?

Oh, that´s not just a girl.
That´s max´s wife.

What are you talking about?

It´s something all the kids
his age are doing.

They just pair off
and say they´re married.

They don´t kiss or anything.

I´m glad he´s finally showing
an interest in girls.

This morning, he tucked his
shirt in and combed his hair,

and last night after he went
to the bathroom,

he put the seat down.

I´m losing him.

Well, i´d keep my eye
on max´s wife.

She´s on her third
juicy juice.

I think she has
a problem.

You know...

Rumor has it someone here
tied the knot.

Stupid Carmen.

Yeah, we got married,
but it´s no big deal.

Well, i´m sorry I missed
the bachelor party

at Chuck E. Cheese.

I was looking forward to putting
a dollar in the mouse´s belt.

Come on, pumpkin.
Let´s go to school.

Here, honey, I made you
a fresh brownie for lunch.

You know
those make you hyper.

Here we go.

Whassup?

Curtis, what are you doing

with all those boxes
from the basement?

I got to enter all these
old employee files

for background checks.
It´s for that stupid

government contract
we´re trying to land.

Hey, if we´re doing
background checks,

I wouldn´t be calling
the government stupid.

Please don´t take me,
I like it here!

Dude, it´s going
to take me forever, man.

I got to lug each one of these
spider-infested boxes

up here one at a time.

Just don´t let ´em
get in your hair.

The mama spiders
lay eggs.

Yeah, right, like i´m some
little punk afraid

of baby spiders.

Man, you play too much!
Go!

That´s your problem.
You play too much!

Hey, guys, make sure Curtis
has all your current

personal information because
we´re doing background checks.

Want to make sure everybody´s
clean for the feds.

What are they checking us for?

I mean, I can see why
they´re checking hosni.

He´s an arab.

Yeah, and he doesn´t drink.
How suspicious is that?

Or curse. One time I dropped
a pipe on his foot...

Nothing.

You know, it´s a great day
in america

when white people,
black people, and latinos

can all come together
and pick on another minority.

What´s wrong
with you guys?

Just ´cause he does his work
and doesn´t hang around

and gossip, you think
he´s suspicious?

Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.

Hey, he´s been here
for two years, and I haven´t

seen one of you make any
attempt to get to know him.

Well, I haven´t seen you
hanging around with him,

Mr. We are the world.

You know, you´re right.

That ends right now.

Hey, hosni.

What are you doing
Friday night?

Is this about overtime,

because I can´t do it
on Fridays.
Oh. Something religious?

No, I like to watch "america´s
funniest home videos."

But I do it religiously.

Listen, why don´t you come over
and have dinner

with me and my family?
We´ve never hung out.

I don´t know anything
about you, your life,

your culture.
It´ll be fun.

All right, how many of my wives
can I bring?

If we hit it off, man,
i´ll let you have one of mine.

Her name´s Benny.

George, we gotta talk.

Sure, Jack, what´s up?

I got a big problem
I need you to handle.

We´re worried the government´s
going to throw up a red flag

on hose-ni.

Haws-ni.

Whatever.

I don´t want him to be
the head inspector on this.

I´m afraid we might lose
our shot at this contract.

Jack, so just ´cause
he´s an arab

you got a problem
with him?

No, George, we found out
he went to flight school.

Did he take all the lessons?

Look, i´m want him off the line
and shuffling papers

till I tell you different.

Oh, man, I just invited him
to dinner.

Oh, rookie mistake, George.

You cannot get close
to your employees.

You like me?

Not really.

That´s ´cause I don´t
let you in.

You know, George, sometimes,
late at night,

i´m balled up
in the fetal position,

i´m naked,
i´m holding a double bourbon,

and I am crying like a baby.

But you will never see that.

Thank you, Jack.

You bet.

♫ all my friends ♫

♫ know the low rider ♫

♫ the low rider ♫

♫ is a little higher ♫

Hi, Carmen, hi, Angie.

Angie?

I´m sorry.
Should I call you mom?

Angie will be fine.

Um, Max, is your wife
staying for dinner,

because i´m making something
special.

Your dad´s bringing somebody
over from work.

Um, well...

No. We already ate
at my parents´.

We´re just going to go
and play in max´s room

for a while.

What she said.

Okay...

Hey, how come he can have
a girl up in his room

and I can´t have a boy
up to mine?

Because he still thinks
making out

is finding quarters
in the couch.

I have a surprise
for you.

Whoa. Cool, a superball.

What´s this for?

Our one-week anniversary.

Don´t pretend
you don´t remember.

Wow. One week.

Where has the time gone?

Well...

Well...

Where´s my gift?

Close your eyes.

It´s a big surprise.

Gum?

Surprise.

You don´t care about
this marriage, do you?

It´s grape!

[ Laughter ]

Hosni, I give you a lot
of credit for coming to the U.S.

I know how hard it was
for my parents to leave Cuba.

And they weren´t even
trying to leave.

They went swimming
and caught a wave.

So, do you ever
get homesick for Egypt?

Well, whenever I miss
the desert and the pyramids,

I just fly to Vegas.

You fly?
You fly the plane?

George: Mom!

Yes. My dad was a pilot.

That´s how I got in this
business in the first place.

Well, I think that´s great.

Am I the only one
whose eyebrows are raised?

Yeah...

Because you pencil them in
that way.

Sorry.
It´s the new superball.

Oh, this isn´t a superball.

Yes, it is.

It´s called a dynaball,
but it´s the same thing.

It´s not the same thing.

Real superballs were created
under 50,000 pounds of pressure.

Superballs bounced higher
than any other ball ever made.

A kid in St. Louis bounced one

and a kid in Chicago
lost an eye!

That´s how great they were.

I bounced one
across the nile.

Where´s the nile?

It´s in Egypt.
That´s where hosni´s from.

Like those guys on the news?
Why do you hate us?

Max!
Max!

He doesn´t hate us.

You know it´s wrong to assume
things about people.

I´m really sorry about that,
hosni.

We try to teach him to be cool

with all different types
of people,

but apparently we missed one.

I told you we should have rented
"Aladdin."

Max, come here.

Your mom is right.

I don´t hate you.

Just like anywhere else,
where I come from,

there are good people
and there are bad people.

Which one are you?

I am good people.

Oh, okay.

He´s a sweet kid.

Does he believe everything
anybody tells him?

Hey, he still thinks doing
yard work is astronaut training.

George, next time
it´s my place.

Angie, thanks for
a great dinner.

You´re welcome.

Benny.

Lighten up.

Try penciling in
a smile on your face.

Oh, hosni. Ha ha ha!

He´s got crazy eyes.

Hey, sorry I missed dinner.

I guess i´ll have to meet hosni
next time.

I don´t know if there will be
a next time

after what i´m supposed to do
on Monday.

What are you talking about?

The powers brothers
are worried about losing

the government contract
because of hosni.

They want me to take him
off the project.

Wait a second.

You knew about this before
dinner and you didn´t tell me?

Angie, if I would have told you,
you would have tipped him off.

You would have used
your sympathy voice --

[ gently ] Would you like
more coffee, maybe some tea?

This isn´t fair to hosni.
They can´t do this.

Just ´cause he took
flying lessons

and he´s from a troubled
part of the world.

Hey, what is the problem?

We´ve got to build airplanes
for the government.

He´s an arab.
He´s got to go.

Mom, how can you say that?

How many times in your life
have you had people judge you

because of your background?

Hey, when people
don´t like me,

they don´t like me
because they know me.

It has nothing to do
with my background.

Dad, if they´re worried
about him,

maybe it´s better
if he´s not making planes.

Carmen, you can´t judge people
by the way they look.

You know, it happens to me
all the time.

When I go shopping,
security follows me.

When I cut my grass, people want
to know how much I charge.

One time
when I was playing golf,

a guy pulls up to the clubhouse,
gets out,

and hands me the keys
to his car.

Dad, what did you do?

I took it.

Then I called him
on his car phone

and told him
that it shakes at 110.

Dad, if hosni´s a good guy
and you do this,

doesn´t that make you
one of the bad guys?

No, because i´m going to tell
the powers brothers

I can´t do this to hosni.

Way to go.
You´re a dope.

All right,
let´s get to the files.

What´s this about, anyway?

I got to put a case together
for hosni

before the powers brothers
get in.

Look at the people they´ve
already approved for the job.

John Patterson --
three stints in rehab.

Mary Sanchez -- 82 years old
and legally blind!

Joe kruvitch --
former porn star.

He was a porn star?

Only for a year.

He made 2,000 films.

This isn´t going to work, man.

Look, you bring this up,
you´re not going to help hosni.

You´re just going to get
those people bumped, too.

Yeah, you´re probably right,

and I don´t want
to send Joe back to porn.

He´s got a bad back.

You wanted to see us, George?

Hey, Curtis,
let me talk to these guys.

So, uh, did you talk
to hosni yet?

No, ´cause i´m not
demoting him.

You had no problem
with the 37 planes

he inspected before
the government contract came up,

and there´s no reason
to have a problem now.

George, please --

no, let me finish.
This is profiling.

So what if he went
to flight school?

If he wasn´t an arab,

we wouldn´t be having
this conversation.

It´s not his fault he´s not some


straight out of rehab!

Did you follow that?

No.

George, let me
spell it out for you.

If we don´t get this contract,
we´re going to a skeleton crew.

We´ll have to lay off
at least 20 people.

Now, do you want that
on your head?

No, man, I don´t.

But I don´t want to screw
one guy out of a job

because you two guys
are paranoid.

George, we are not closing
our doors over hosni.

I want him doing meaningless
paperwork by tomorrow.

George, you want to
get something to eat?

Uh, no, I can´t, man.
I got to work through lunch.

Got paperwork.

What´s black and red
and mad as hell?

A brother with 15 paper cuts.

Damn!



Poor Curtis.

I´d rather eat my own hands
than be stuck doing paperwork.

Yeah, well...

That´s...yeah.

Max, is your mom home?
I got to talk to her.

She´s still shopping.

But, look, I found
one of those old superballs

but the auction´s almost over.
Can we make a bid?



They must be collectibles.
No, let´s bid $6.

I don´t want to lose it.
Let´s bid $1,000.

Okay, i´m in charge
of the bidding now.

Let´s bid $7.

You´ve been outbid.

Okay, $10.

Outbid.

Okay, $20.

Outbid.

$30.

Outbid.

$50!

Go to $1,000!

$60!

It´s over! We win!

Dah! What do
the Lopez men have?

Superball!

That´s right!

What are you telling him?

Dad just got me
an original superball for $60.


for a little rubber ball?

Congratulations.

You´re officially
out of the hood.

Hey, dad, i´m gonna buy
some gum. Can I have $300?

You want $300?
Mm-hmm.

I buried it behind
the lemon tree in the backyard.

You dig it up,
you can have it.

Cool!
[ Thud ]

George: Oh!

Here, let me help you.
You okay?

Dad, why don´t you
just hire somebody

to dig the holes
for the sprinklers?

Max is gonna figure it out
someday.

Not if he keeps running
into the door.

So, how´d it go with
the powers brothers today?

Well,

sometimes you eat the bear,
sometimes the bear eats you,

and sometimes you´re what
the bear leaves behind

in the woods.

What happened?

If I don´t demote hosni
and we don´t get the contract,


are gonna get laid off.

Oh, my god.

I don´t know what to do.

What kind of example
am I for my kids

if I can´t stand up
for what I believe in?

Well, what kind of manager
would you be

if you let 20 people
get fired to save one?

Thanks, baby.
You´re my rock.

George, you got to make
a decision.

Well, I can either do
the practical thing

or the right thing,
but I can´t do both.

Ah, I hate being manager.

I hate having this kind
of responsibility.

It´s k*lling me.

That´s why you´re exactly
the kind of guy

who should be manager.

You suffer like this
because you actually

give a damn about people.

No, I don´t.

Yes, you do.

You know Mr. Salazar
down the street?

He´s got that big operation
coming up.

I don´t care.

He might not make it.

So what?

I made vegetable soup
for him.

Oh, that´s nice.

Max, what are you
still doing up?

I couldn´t sleep.
It´s my marriage.

Yeah?

Dad, did you and mom ever
want to stop being married?

No.

We´ve been married
for 16 years,

and i´m still happy
to be with her.

I´ve been with Allison
for one week,

and it feels like 16 years.

So, you want out?

Maybe.

Are there any kids
to worry about?

Not that I know of.

[ Laughs ]
You know what that means?

No.

Max, maybe you should
break up with her.

Can you do it for me?

I think you should do it.

That way,
she´ll respect you,

and you still may have
a chance to be friends.

Are you afraid of her, too?

A little bit.

Hey, hosni.

George, what are you
doing here so early?

I´m usually the first one.

I´m working
on my old machine.

It helps me think.

For a moment, I thought
they demoted you.

That would have been
humiliating.

Ha. Yeah.

Yeah.

Well, anyway,
i´m glad you´re here.

Look at this.
I found an old superball

for Max at a flea market.

Oh, hey, man, thanks.

I tried to get one on eBay,
but some idiot

bid it up to 60 bucks.

Yeah, well, you know...
Yeah.

You´re here early
for a reason, aren´t you?

Listen, hosni, there´s
no easy way to say this.

The powers brothers think
we have a better chance

of getting the government job
without you.

What are you talking about?

It´s a flight school,
and you´re arab.

And the powers brothers think
that the government´s

going to become suspicious,

and they don´t want
to take the chance.

I don´t believe this.

Look, man, i´ll make sure
you get the same money

and the same benefits,

but i´m not gonna pretend
this is better than it is.

I mean, I know you take
pride in your work,

but you´re not gonna be
head inspector, hosni.

You´re gonna be...
Shuffling papers.

So i´m being profiled
out of a job?

Yes, and it sucks,
and it´s a lousy world,

but if we lose this contract,


And i´m the manager, man,
and I can´t let that happen.

I understand.

If it makes you
feel better,

Jack powers drinks naked
at night

rolled up
in the fetal position.

That helps a little.

Listen, I just want
to thank you

for at least being
honest with me.

It makes it much easier
to hear bad news like this

from a friend.

So you gonna be all right
with this?

Hell, no.

Do all the lopezes believe
everything anybody tells them?

You´re very quiet today.

And stop playing
with your food.

There´s something I need
to talk to you about.

Oh, boy. I´ll be outside.

No, it´s okay.
We´re all family here.

Not for long.

Allison --

I accept.

Huh?

Your apology.
I accept it.

We should have picked out
our week-iversary gift together.

Allison...

I want a divorce.

What? You´re divorcing me?

But I want you
to know something.

It´s not me.

It´s you.

I´m sorry.

You´re not gonna do
better than me, Max Lopez.

You okay?

I guess.

It´s just that
Allison and I

won´t be playing
together anymore.

I feel bad --
like in my stomach.

Hey, the superball
came today.

All right! Let´s go
play with it right now!


Not bad!

Hey!

This is a real toy --
a back-in-the-day toy.

Are you ready, Max?

I´m ready.

That is the best 60 bucks
i´ve ever spent.