06x18 - George Decides to Sta-Local Where It's Familia

[bunniefuu]

Why isn't anybody working?

What's the point, man?
The factory's closing down.

We all need
to find new jobs.
There's nothing out there,
George.

Look, I'm freaked out
about finding a job, too,

but this factory
is still running,

and we still have orders
to get out,

and we are gonna fill
those orders,

because we take pride
in our work.

Yeah, well, pride is not
gonna keep my lights on.

That's okay, Gina,

because â¿sabes quã©?

Light does not
look good on you.

Well, there's nothing
in the paper for me.

Time to move to plan b.

If the factory's moving
to Mexico,

then I'm going with it.

Ernie, they're only hiring
Mexican citizens.

Well, then I'll sneak
across the border, man.

I'll hide in the trunk
if I have to.

Oh, que la!
Hide in a trunk?

Nobody cares
if you go that way.

Everybody, listen.

Get back to work.

Yeah, get back to work,
suckers.

What are you doing here, mom?
You don't work here anymore.

Notice anything different
about me?

You didn't shave
your back today?

Wayne bought this for me.

It makes you look
like a high-priced hooker.

Thank you, Gina.

I feel like
a high-priced hooker.

Hey, the rent-to-own
furniture king

needs a rent-to-own queen.

Hey,
who's that with Jack?

Maybe it's the guy from Mexico
who bought the factory.

Maybe the layoffs
are starting now.

No way. They promised us
three more weeks of work.

If this is our last day,
I'm going down swinging.

I'm gonna tell this guy
he just can't

take over our factory
and give our jobs to Mexicans.
Yes!

That's right.
This is america.

Yes!
We've got our own Mexicans.

Oh, George, good.

I want you to meet Enrique vega,
the head of aeromayan.

Mr. Vega's gonna be here
for the next couple of weeks,

just to watch
how we operate.

'Sup?

'Sup?

You got a lot of angry
factory workers out there.

You're pretty brave
coming in here by yourself.

George, I happen to be

one of the wealthiest men
in Mexico.

I don't go anywhere by myself.

Nice to meet you.
I can't believe it.

Welcome to your factory.

I'm sure that, uh,
everyone out there

really sees me
as a bad guy, but, uh--

oh, well, I don't see you
as the bad guy.

Bought me out for 20 mil,

and he wants me to consult
at his plant in cancãºn.

Does "consult" mean
drink Tequila on the beach

until you pass out?

I plead the cinco.

How do you sleep at night,

knowing you're ruining
all these people's lives?

You shouldn't be worrying
about the workers, George.

You should be worrying
about yourself.

Jimmy.

If that's the way
it's gonna be,

let me tell you, vato,
I pull hair, I bite,

and I ain't afraid
to yell "r*pe."

Vato, go for it.

Relax.

I want you to work for me
in my U.S. office in Phoenix.

That's a contract.

You're offering me a job?

You're one hell of a manager,

and I need someone to coordinate
my sales in the U.S.

You interested?

I'm gonna say yes...

But those people out there
think that I'm giving you hell.

And I don't want them
to think that I sold out!

I assume there'll be benefits
and a health care plan!

There will be!

And a corner office
with a view!

Company car!


Does that include
a dollar sign and commas?

No!

Thanks for having
confidence in me.

That's a generous offer,
and I will accept it gladly.

Did you hear what I said?

I will accept it gladly!

* all my friends

* know the low rider

**

Angie, I need
to talk to you.

Hey, honey.

I need to talk to you.

Hello!

I forgot what I needed
to talk to you about.

I read that when
men lose their jobs,

they can feel emasculated.

How about I take you upstairs

and remind you that
you are still all man to me?

No, you--you don't need
to make me feel better.

I got a great offer today.

Angie, you are gonna be
making love to a rich man.

George, we have savings.

We don't have
to resort to that!

No!

Cochina,
get your mind straight.

I'm the rich man.
Oh.

The guy who bought the factory
offered me a job, Angie,

with a company car, a corner
office and double my salary!

Oh, honey, that's great!

Start packing, baby.
We are moving to Phoenix!

Phoenix?

Wow. Moving to Phoenix.

Damn, that's Ernie.

I didn't know
how to tell him about the job.

Break it to him gently.

George!
I'm not telling him.

You been rich
for two minutes,

and already you don't care about
the little people, selfish.

George, George, George!
I figured it out, man.

You and me should
start a business together.

Yeah, with your sales
and managerial experience,

and my ability to run

a 3-phase,
big-bore metal lathe--

as long as
it's a pre-'97 model--

we could do anything.

Uh...

A-Actually, Ernie, um...

Vega
offered me a job, bro.

I-I'm, uh...

I'm-a move to Phoenix.

Wow, Phoenix.

Well, that's...
That's great for you, George.

No, no, man,
it's--it's--

it's not that great.

There--there's
no roach coach, man, so...

I gotta eat
in a dining room.

A-A-And it's
gonna be noisy

because the health center
that they share

with a modeling agency
is right upstairs.

So all day i'm-a hear
like that--"hey, girl,"

what-tcha.

Well, I-I-I guess

you gotta take
what you can get, huh?

I'm gonna miss you, man.

I'm sorry, man.
I mean, I...

You know, I wish
I could take you with me.

Hey, don't be
sorry for me, vato.

I'm happy for you.
Your victories are my victories.

Hey, hey, now I'm gonna have
someplace to crash in Phoenix

whenever I drift through
the southwest looking for work.

I can't stop winning.
Yay, Ernie.

That was rough.

It's hard when good news for you
is bad news for somebody else.

I don't wanna go.

What?

Well, I just
started thinking

of all the things
we're leaving behind.

I mean, George...

We--we fell in love here.

We conceived
our children here.

We still have that, Angie.
We're taking the couch.

I don't want to move.

Angie, but this is
a huge opportunity, okay?

I want you to be excited.

I am, but I'm sad, too.

I feel two things.

Estã¡loca,
feel two things!

Well, pick the easy one
and let me deal with that.

Now...
I feel unsupported.

That's three things.

I come home unemployed,
you wanna take me upstairs.

I tell you
I got a great new job,

and you won't stop crying.

I can never do nothing
in this house.

Dad, I was just thinking.

Really? And what
was that like, huh?

Did it tickle
the inside of your head?

I'm serious.

I don't wanna
move to Phoenix.

I don't wanna
change schools.

All my friends
are here.

You know what
your mom would tell you?

She'd say, "Max, you're gonna
make new friends in Phoenix,

and it's all
gonna work out."

Where is mom?
Upstairs crying.

See? Nobody wants to go.

Max, you are going with us.
End of discussion.

Fine, but when you're old

and I'm making the decision
where you live,

I'm putting you in
the worst place I can think of.

I probably shouldn't
tell you this,

but I'm terrified
of the playboy mansion.

Hey, George.

Hey, Vic.

Just came by to see if Angie's
feeling better about the move.

No, man,
and it's k*lling me.

I got this great opportunity

and everybody's making me
feel guilty about it.

Well, moving your family's
never easy.

But trust me,

once they get to Phoenix,
they'll love it.

It's a great town.

Why don't you
move with us, Vic?

Angie would love that.

What, are you kidding me?

The heat, the dust,
all the old people--

it's depressing, man.

Anyway...

I wanted to give you something
before you go, George.

A pocketknife?

My father gave me that
when I left Cuba.

I'd like you to have it.

Wow, I mean,
I-I don't know what to say.

You know,
I always wanted one, but I...

You know, I never
had a dad to...

I know, mijo.

I bet this has
a lot of memories for you.

Oh, yeah.

When I was a boy,

my father and I
would go out to the fields

and castrate the pigs
with it.

I bet my dad and I
woulda castrated pigs, too.

Why are you crying?

Why are you shrinking?

Mom, you think
I'm making a mistake

moving to Phoenix?

You have to go
where there's work, George.

Thank you.

What are you doing?

Oh, um... ahem--taking
a picture of Max for Wayne.

You know, he thinks
if he has a photo

of a little Mexican boy
on his desk,

he'll be able to sell more
furniture to latinos.

That's a picture of me.

Are you taking this

because you want something
to remember me by?

Please.

You're gonna miss me.

No, I'm not.

Mom, admit it
or I'll tell Wayne

two of the three reasons
why you can't donate blood.

Fine.

I'm gonna miss you.

How could you say that?

You just told me to.

Because I didn't think
you would.

I'm getting guilt
from everybody,

but the one time I need you
to be a cold, uncaring mother,

you can't give that to me.

Well, I am sorry.
It's just how I feel.

I've never been away from you
for more than a few days.

Stop it!

What kind of twisted,
mentally deranged game

are you playing?

Next thing,
you'll probably tell me

how much you care about me.

I do care about you.

That's it!

Hey, George.
Look, man, if you're coming
over here to tell me you're sad

to see me go, â¿sabes quã©?
I don't want to hear it.

I didn't come down here
to tell you that.

It's not always about you,
conceited.

But don't read this card
until I leave, all right?

Man, why are you here?

I need your keys
to the factory.

We're gonna
take over the building.
What are you talking about?

We're gonna occupy it
and shut down production.

Then we're gonna
move all the machinery

out to the parking lot
as a protest.

Yeah, but won't that
make it easier for them

to put it on trucks
and move to Mexico?

Not if we cover 'em with butter
so they're all slippery.

What-tcha?

Yeah, so I need
your keys to the factory

and all your butter.

Look, man, here's
what you guys need to do.

You need to lock yourselves
in the factory, right?

And call every newspaper
and radio station.

You gotta put pressure
on the new owner

to make him rethink
what he's doing.

You think that would
actually work?

Look, it's worth a shot.

Uh...

You know what?
You guys...

You guys can't do this
on your own, man.

I'm going down there.
Hey, are you sure, George?

This could mess up
your job in Phoenix.
You know what?

Maybe I wanna
mess up my job in Phoenix.

You guys need a leader.

You don't go to w*r
without a general.

You don't play football
without a quarterback,

and you don't have a pack
of wolves without the head wolf.

What do they call that?
The--the lone wolf.

How can a lone wolf
lead a pack?

He's alone.

What if they're following,
but he doesn't know it?

You wanna argue about wolves,

or you wanna
go down to the factory?
No, I wanna go to the factory.

But can we talk
about wolves on the way?

And we're gonna stay here
until we convince him

to keep these jobs
in america.

Thanks for putting us
on the air.

Hey, everybody, who plays

your favorite
jamming old-school hits?

Dr. Funkenstein
and Rodney!

George.
Angie, what are you
doing here?

Well, I got your message
and I had to come down.

I hope you're not
doing this

because we didn't want
to leave L.A.

Yeah, dad,
I'll make new friends.

I'll teach those Nevada kids
how to skateboard.

Max, Phoenix is in Arizona!

See, the move's
already a good thing.

He learned a new state.

Honey, you don't
have to do this for us.

Look, it's not
just for you.

All I had growing up
was my mom,

and half the time
she wasn't there.

Now I'm surrounded by family
and people who care about me.

Look, that's all
I ever wanted, Angie,

and I'm gonna fight
to keep it.

Hey, when do the cops get here?
Did I miss anything?

Is that why you're here?

Don't let her fool you, George.
Your mom's here to support you.

That's it. The thing I was gonna
show you on the forklift?

You can forget about joining
the 8-foot-high club.

He don't need it.

He's already a member
of the 4-foot-high club.

George... do you have
any extra sleeping bags?

Look, Angie, you guys
can't stay here.

Yes, we can. I am with you
for better or for worse.

Thanks, baby.

But, uh,
if I see your mom and Wayne

make a move
towards that forklift,

we're outta here.

They'll never
get up there.

Ernie covered it all
with butter.

Lopez, wake up.

Stop, Salma,
I got a cramp.

Oh, vega.

How did you get in here?

I paid $20 million
for this company.

They threw in
a set of keys.

Come in my office.

I offered you a great job.

I'm a little surprised

at the way
you're paying me back.

You've either
got a lot of guts,

or you're the dumbest man
I've ever met.

Maybe I'm both.
You don't know me.

Look, I can't leave this factory
and my home, okay?

They mean everything to me.

What do you hope to accomplish
with all of this?

Hey, I got you here, didn't I?
Now have a seat.

Let's talk about how
we can keep this factory open.

George, your people
get $16 an hour.

Do you know
what we pay in Mexico?

$2.75. Look, I know all
the reasons you're doing this.

I also know that
most of your big contracts

are in this country,

and a bunch of bad publicity
is gonna cost you money.

All right. You win.
The factory stays.

Really?

Yes, and since
Jack and Mel

are gonna come down
to Mexico,

you're gonna have to run
this place by yourself.

Really?

You're a tough negotiator.

I guess I am.

And also, uh...

The mayor found out
what was going on here.

He offered me
some tax incentives

that I couldn't turn down.

The deal was done
before I came in here tonight.

All I heard was the mayor
listens to George Lopez.

So I'm in charge, right?
Nobody above me?

You're the best
at what you do.

As long as you keep
this company making money,

you're not gonna
see me here.

Don't screw it up.
Thank you.

What did vega want?

Hey, the factory's staying open,
and I'm in charge.

Well, he's either
a giant gambler,

or he's the dumbest man
I ever met.

Maybe he's both.
You don't know him.

Hey, hey, mom, you know,

part of the, uh, the reason
that I decided to stay here

was because that you said
that you cared about me.

Oh, yeah.

Well, that's when I thought
you were leaving.

I didn't mean it.

You can't take that back.

Oh, George, stop
being such a baby.

If you want me to prove
that I don't care about you,

I would be happy to come
over there with a big stick

and knock some candy
out of your big piã‘ata head.

Well, waddle over here
and try it,

you nasty little penguin.

You coming over
for dinner tomorrow, mom?

Oh, yeah, I'll be there.

I forgot to tell you,
uh, we canceled it.

I wasn't coming, anyway.