07x10 - Music to My Fears/Fluff and Foiled

[bunniefuu]

- ♪ Crashing through the crowded halls ♪

♪ Dodging girls like Ping-Pong ba*ls ♪

♪ Just to reach the bathroom on time ♪

♪ Leaping over laundry piles ♪

♪ Diapers you can smell for miles ♪

♪ Guy's got to do what he can to survive ♪

- ♪ In the Loud house, in the Loud house ♪

- ♪ Duck, dodge, push, and shove ♪

♪ That's how we show our love ♪

- ♪ In the Loud house, in the Loud house ♪

- ♪ One boy and ten girls ♪

- ♪ Wouldn't trade it for the world ♪

- ♪ Loud, Loud, Loud ♪

♪ Loud house ♪

- Poo-poo.

[cheerful music]

♪ ♪

- [inhales deeply]

[playing "Taps"]

- O-M-gosh, guys.

I totes didn't think this day would actually come.

- It won't be the same around here, that's for sure.

- I've already begun to make funeral arrangements.

How do we feel about lilies?

They were the deceased's favorite.

- Are you sure their favorite flower wasn't car-nation?

[laughs]

- Ugh. Luan, read the room.

- Oh, sorry about your loss, chiefs,

but not too sorry to demand payment

for towing this pile of bolts.

[engine starts]

[somber music]

- Of all the places for Vanzilla to bite the dust.

Dudes, I didn't think we'd get out of there.

- Ah, come on. What's the hold up?

- I've been sitting here forever.

[all screaming]

- That was a long seven hours.

- [belches]

[both sobbing]

- Aw, I know it's hard.

Vanzilla's meant a lot to this family

ever since Great-Grandpa Loud bought it.

But I think it's time to just let it go,

emotionally and physically.

[clears throat]

- [straining]

[both grunting]

- Mom's right. And at least we can rest easy

knowing Vanzilla had a long, rockin' life.

- Yeah. To be honest,

I'm shocked we didn't have it scrapped years ago.

Oh, I'm wrong for saying that?

[scoffs] A toad's been living in the rear speaker

since before Lily was born!

- How could you all be so heartless?

We should be doing everything we can

to try to save Vanzilla!

- She's always been there for us.

Lynn, when everyone else was too scared

to play baseball with you, Vanzilla was your catcher.

- Yeah.

- And Rita, when you wanted "Mommy Alone Time,"

Vanzilla gave you the soundproof haven you needed.

[no audible dialogue]

- [sighs] Thank you for that.

- So what do you say, huh?

Give us one more shot to save her.

This was Gramps' van once too.

I bet he can help us!

- Well...

[harp music]

[sighs] Okay.

both: Whoo-hoo! [toad croaks]

- But just until this weekend.

Then we have to shop for a new van.

both: Whoo-hoo! Ha ha! [toad croaks]

- Don't you worry. We'll get her

up and running like new.

- Sorry, Boris.

Funeral's off.

But keep your shovel handy.

This isn't over yet.

- [grumbles]

[ship horn blares] - Hey!

It's Gramps and his boat truck!

- How's my favorite kiddo

holding up through all this? [seagull squawks]

- Aw, well, thanks, Dad.

I'm-- - [blubbering]

All righty. What's the game plan?

- We gotta narrow down the problem

so we can get her running like new.

And I know just the thing.

- [chuckles nervously]

- So if we get Vanzilla going fast,

we may be able to roll-start the engine,

and then we'll know the problem is the pistons.

- It's a--a pretty big hill.

- Now remember, son, when you get enough speed,

try to start her up.

[both strain]

- [screaming]

[shrieks] It won't start!

It won't start! Aah!

[retches]

- Hm. Well, I'll be chummed.

So it's not the pistons.

- [gasps] No, no.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no!

Aah!

[retches]

Ah! [retches]

Not again! [retches]

Ah! [retches]

[continues screaming]

- Maybe we shouldn't have picked the guy

with the weakest stomach to do this.

- It was nothing! Ah!

[lightning cracks]

[ominous music]

♪ ♪

- If something's up with Vanzilla's electrical system,

then we need a huge jolt of power.

Lisa said her lightning rod should do the trick.

[lightning crashes] [all gasp]

[electricity zapping]

[all gasp]

- All right.

[key cranks]

Huh, nothing.

- [groans] So it's not the electrical.

[lightning crashes] [both gasp]

- Uh, Dad,

I'd get out of there if I were you.

- Huh? What? [lightning crashes]

[incoherent babbling]

[van crashes] Ugh!

Okay. Dibs on not starting the van next time.

Oof!

- [sighs] We've been out here all night,

and we still don't know what's wrong.

- Yeah, but at least I found this grimy old cowbell.

Must've left it in Vanzilla.

- [chuckling] That's no cowbell.

It's the left crank cylinder gasket.

- Ah, yes, the good ol' LCCG.

How did I miss that before?

And look how rusted it is.

This must be what's wrong with Vanzilla!

- Yup. If we can replace it,

maybe we can save the old girl.

- Hey, Flip always has a lot of used car parts around.

To Flip's!

- Yep, it's a left crank cylinder gasket, all right.

Busted for sure.

Good thing I got a ton of 'em.

- Whoo-hoo! - Yeah!

- But none for a Fung van like yours.

all: Aww.

- 'Cause there ain't no such thing.

all: Huh?

- There is a Fungo.

[all cough] - Hey.

That's our van!

The letter O must have fallen off.

- [gasps] So that's where this came from!

I--I found it in our driveway when I was a little minnow.

I've used it as a belt buckle ever since.

[chuckles]

- Eh, don't worry about it, chief.

Ol' Flip likes to keep it casual too.

Anywho, uh, I got some crummy news.

I don't got a gasket that fits a Fungo van.

Nobody does.

The company went belly-up ages ago.

But I might have some good news.

I didn't ask for the bribe yet!

- We're short on time.

- Well, you could try asking for the part

from the inventor himself, Freddy Fungo.

He lives in the abandoned factory outside of town.

- Well, what are we waiting for?

Let's go!

- Lana, honey, where are your pants?

- I thought we were all taking 'em off.

[crow caws]

[suspenseful music]

Well, here goes nothin'.

[intercom buzzes]

- What do you want?

- Mr. Fungo? We came about your van.

See, we-- - I don't ever want to hear

about that stinking van again.

- [gasps] - Now make like

a busted muffler and hit the road.

- If there's one thing being an old sea dog's taught me,

it's if the crab won't come to you,

you gotta go to the crab!

[all straining]

- Oof! - Agh!

- [whimpering] Aah!

If we can't go over,

then we go under!

[grunting]

[metallic clunk] Um, guys?

I, uh, may have hit a--

- Uh! - Whoa!

Ah!

[weakly] A water main.

[seagull squawks]

- [growls] If we can't go over, and we can't go under,

then by Ahab, we go through!

[horn blares]

[tires squealing]

[all yelling]

all: Aah!

Oof!

[all groan]

- Just like I planned it.

- Whoa. [chuckles]

[mouse squeaks]

[triumphant music]

- I thought I told you bozos

to shift into high gear and beat it.

- But Mr. Fungo, you gotta listen!

- A-about your van, it's a--

- Big--[blows raspberry] Right?

I get it all ready, pal.

- No, no, no! We came here to--

- Laugh at me, like all the rest.

Ha! Sorry to ruin your fun,

but Freddy Fungo's running on empty.

[buzzer blares] Now, out you go!

- Oh!

- We're not here to laugh at you!

We love your van!

- Yeah, w-we came to ask you for a new

left crank cylinder gasket to keep it alive.

- Wait, you--y-you love my van?

- Of course we do!

It's a member of the family!

Well, I even keep a picture of the old girl in my wallet.

- Me too.

- I keep one in my hat!

- [sniffles] In all these years,

I thought my career had blown a tire,

that I was a great big failure.

You see, I came from a big family.

We could never all fit into the same car at one time.

So when I grew up, I designed a van

with room for the whole family.

But when I tried to sell it, nobody wanted it.

Back then, it was all about sporty--

tail fins and convertibles.

So I had to close the factory.

[sighs]

But to hear my van's meant so much to your family,

why, I'm a success after all.

Now let's burn rubber.

We gotta go save your van.

Right. [chuckles]

Gotta let you down first.

- So is this where you keep the gaskets?

- Oof! [metallic crash]

- Yes, it is.

- Whoo-hoo! - Ah, yeah!

- If I had any.

But I don't.

all: Aww.

- But fear not.

Fasten your seat belts.

We're gonna make one from scratch.

- Making our own car part?

I gotta be dreaming.

Dad, pinch me.

[grunts softly] Nope, I'm not!

- Ow! What was that for?

- Well, just in case you were dreaming.

[chuckles]

[cheerful music]

♪ ♪

[laughing] Yes!

- Yes! - Whoo-hoo!

[mice squeaking]

- All right, Gramps, give it a try.

Oh, please work, please work, please work.

[engine cranks, turns over]

[all coughing]

[engine rumbling]

[all cheer]

Aw, I knew you'd pull through, old girl.

- Hey, Lana, get in here!

Now you'll have a family photo for your wallet too, Fungo.

- Aww.

I'll never tire of looking at this.

- Sorry, Boris.

They fixed the van after all.

Funeral's off for good.

- [sighs]

You Louds are exhausting.

Boris needs a nap.

[snoring]

[dramatic rock music]

♪ ♪

[crowd cheering]

- Huh...yah!

[whistle blows]

[crowd cheering]

[buzzer blares]

[all cheering]

- Nice work, kids! [all cheering]

Five more wins, and you're in the championship!

[all cheering] - Hey, Lynn!

Hold up. Pardon me.

Coming through. Excuse me.

[grunts] Whoa!

[grunting]

- You okay, Andre?

- No worries. The buns broke my fall.

Anyway, great game!

I've been watching you play all season,

and I can tell you have star power,

which is why, on behalf of the Burpin' Burger,

I'd like to offer you a sponsorship!

If you promote our fine establishment

and wear our logo,

you'll be a BB VIP.

Uh, it--it means you'll-- you'll get free burgers.

- In that case, count me in!

- Stop by the restaurant later

to get a taste of the VIP treatment.

- I believe this gherkin is yours--

and this mustard.

- Ha ha!

Enough for everyone!

- Yeah!

- Sponsorship rules!

- I have heartburn...

in the best way!

- You're so lucky!

I wish I could eat here for free anytime I wanted to.

- Maybe you can eat here for free.

I mean, you're all star players too.

- Here's your free VIP cookie dough milkshake

with extra chocolate and caramel sauce.

- [gasps]

That's spicy mustard.

- I really should label these.

- So Andre, we were just talking,

and seeing how our wins are team efforts,

is there any chance you can sponsor all of us?

- [sighs] Wish I could,

but we can only sponsor one person.

And we already made the Lynn Burpy Meal toys

with kick action, catchphrase, and signature burp.

- In your face, chump! [belches]

- So sweet. - So accurate.

- But hey, you should ask around.

With the championship game coming up,

I'm pretty sure places will want to sponsor

the rest of you.

- That's a great idea.

If we each had our own sponsorship,

we'd get so much free stuff!

- Worth a shot. - Whoo-hoo!

- Let's do it.

- Imagine this: the Flip's Food and Fuel logo

billboarded across my jersey

as I race down the field to victory!

I'll quadruple your sales...

- Yeah, I smell an "in exchange for" coming.

- In exchange for free Flippees and snacks.

- I'm bumping on the word "free,"

but I'll tell you what.

I'll give you % off Flippees

and a pack of generic corn crunchies.

- Free Flippees plus unlimited pretzels,

assorted chips...

- [gasps] - And corn dogs.

- [gasps]

Corn dogs are off the table!

I'll give you Flippees,

all the expired pork rinds you can eat,

and your own key to the bathroom.

That's my final offer.

- Deal!

[groovy music]

♪ ♪

[all cheer]

[all cheering]

- Ah, yeah, free admission!

[pensive music]

♪ ♪

- Looking good, team.

- Yeah, I'm loving the branded gear.

- Hey, Margo!

Quit your yapping and show off my logo!

[wolf whistles]

Now that's a handsome logo.

[whistle blows]

- [grunts]

[crowd cheering]

I play better when I'm burpin'!

[belches]

[all cheering]

[toys belch]

[all cheer]

- Ha!

[crowd cheers]

- Another perk for my favorite spokesperson.

Enjoy unlimited games with Gus' gold card.

- Girls, the games are on me.

[all cheer]

- [grunts]

[crowd cheering]

After an "udderly" amazing game like this,

I'm going to Dairyland!

[all cheering]

VIPs coming through.

[all cheering]

- [grunts]

[crowd cheers]

- You Roos played your heart out today.

Any words for the "Action News" audience?

- Head to Duds for Dudes,

where satisfaction is guaranteed

'cause they know what a dude wants

and what a dude needs!

[crowd chanting] Kangaroos! Kangaroos!

[crowd cheering] - Whoa-hoh-hoh!

[cheering continues]

- Yeah!

Oh, come on!

I just got the mustard out!

[all slurping]

- Sponsorship rules!

- Here's to freebies!

- Keep those Flippees coming!

[sneaky music]

- Hey, Margo!

That unlimited Flippee's for you,

not your freeloading friends!

Not to mention, sharing straws is unsanitary!

Good as new.

- Okay, folks, circle up.

For anyone keeping count, this is my ninth loofah,

and I'm still purple,

which is unfortunate because this game is televised,

and my mom's in the stands.

- Whoo-hoo-hoo!

That purple gal's my daughter! Whoo-hoo-hoo!

- So do me a favor and save me any further embarrassment

by playing your hearts out and winning this championship!

[all cheer]

- Lynn! Good luck out there.

I brought you the Burpin' Burger suit

to wear during the big game.

- [grunts]

Seriously?

But I'm already wearing the logo.

- The logo's fine for regular games,

but this is the championship game,

which means more eyes are on you,

which means it's a huge PR opportunity

for the Burpin' Burger.

So if you want to keep the perks,

you'll have to wear the buns.

It's all in your contract.

♪ ♪

- Whoa! [loud crash]

- Hey there, Mango.

- It's Margo.

- Eh, pretty sure it's Mango.

I had this Flip's Food and Fuel sign

made special for the big game.

Spin it like you mean it,

or you can kiss that bathroom pass goodbye.

- Okay, what you do here is you fire the garlic knots

into the audience after each kick.

Now go make Gus proud...

[quietly] And very, very rich.

- Sorry we're late.

I was at Duds for Dudes.

Mr. Spokes is making me promote the store

by wearing this.

Hope I can still run in this wing tip.

- You think that's bad?

Tippy's making me drink cheese smoothies

and say, "Just fondue it!"

[slurps]

[groans]

[slurps]

Brie is not a great sipping cheese.

- Look, I know this new stuff we have to do is annoying,

but it's worth it.

No pain, no perks, right?

- I guess. - Yeah.

- You're right. [stomach grumbles]

- Sorry.

That was the cheese talking.

[whistle blows] - Welcome to the tri-county

girls soccer championships.

We've got Hazeltucky facing off against the Kangaroos.

Battle of the ages, eh, Pep?

- Whatever you say.

- And we have here what looks to be a very large hamburger.

This is gonna be an interesting game, huh, Pep?

- I have no interest in anything.

- Love that joie de vivre.

And here's the kickoff.

[whistle blows]

And the burger takes the ball

and runs it down the field!

- [panting]

[grunts]

[crowd exclaims] - Oh!

I'd say that was out of bounds.

Wouldn't you, Pep?

She passes to Diana.

- [panting] - And Carla is on her heels,

but something's not right.

- Oh, no.

[wavery] Not the cheese shakes.

- Ooh, Hazeltucky scores again.

But luckily, the burger is making a comeback.

Uh-oh, looks like she's in a pickle.

- Paula!

[shoe squeaking]

- [straining]

Ugh!

[crowd gasps]

- Margo! Block the ball!

- Huh?

Oof!

- Ooh, into her own goal!

- Tragic.

- [groans] What was that?

[all cheering]

- Ah! Sorry!

My shoe is too big.

- With that accidental assist from the Kangaroos,

Hazeltucky now leads -.

- Oh, it's not over yet.

This burger's still cooking.

- More knots, Maddie!

- Yah!

- Ugh! [grunting]

- Ah! Ugh!

[crowd groans]

- The burger is down!

[chuckles] Talk about ground beef.

- You're exhausting.

[tense music]

- [gasps]

♪ ♪

[whistle blows] - Unbelievable.

Hazeltucky has a six-point lead heading into halftime.

[all groaning]

- Okay, team, huddle up!

This isn't working.

I love the sponsorship perks,

but they're not worth this humiliation.

- Mm-mm. - Hear, hear.

- Hey, Kangaroos!

We've got some more merch for you to wear

in the second half.

- Sorry, but we're out.

- We were obsessed by all the free stuff,

but we're ready to get back to what's really important.

- Playing like champions.

[bright music]

[all cheer]

- Whoa. - Hey!

[whistle blows]

- [grunting]

[crowd cheering]

- [grunts]

- [grunts]

- [grunts]

[crowd cheering]

[buzzer blares]

- What a comeback!

The Kangaroos win the championship, -!

[chuckles] Can you feel the excitement?

- For the first time in my life,

I feel something.

Is this joy?

I hate it.

[sniffles]

[all cheering]

- I finally got the purple off.

What'd I miss?

all: We won!

- All right!

If you need me, I'll be in the showers.

[laughter]

- ♪ Cramped inside this tiny space ♪

♪ May sound bad but ain't the case ♪

♪ In the Loud house ♪ - ♪ Loud house ♪

- ♪ Duck and dodge and push and shove ♪

♪ That's the way we show our love ♪

♪ In the Loud house ♪ - ♪ Loud house ♪

- ♪ Laundry piles stacked up high ♪

♪ Hand-me-downs that make me cry ♪

♪ Stand in line to take a pee ♪

♪ Never any privacy ♪

♪ Chaos with kids ♪

♪ That's the way it always is ♪

♪ In the Loud house ♪