02x06 - Who's Afraid of Cory Wolf?

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Opening Credits

[SCENE – Cory’s room at night. Outside, it is raining very hard and there is lighting. In his room, Cory sits at his desk writing with a plume pen.]

Cory: (Voiceover) October 31st, All Hallow’s Eve. I, Cory Matthews, leave this journal so that those who knew me can understand my terrible fate. For tonight, at precisely nine ‘o’clock, eight central, when the moon shines full, I will become the most terrifying of all creatures: the Werewolf. (Thunder & lightning outside, a wolf howls)

(Enter Amy, holding a feather duster with a single feather remaining)

Amy: Cory, what did you do to my duster?

Cory: (Looks at the pile of feathers he’s use as pens, then howls) AAAOOOOOOOOO!!!

(Amy exit)

[SCENE – Cory’s room, continued from earlier. Once again, Cory is writing]

Cory: (Voiceover) 8:35. I’m drooling more than usual. (Wipes his mouth) This change into wolfdom us upon me.

(Enter Shawn in a curly, dark wig wearing the came clothes as Cory)

Shawn: (Happily) Hey, Cory. Ready for the Halloween party?

Cory: Please, I have no time for such things. (Waves him off)

Shawn: Come on, guess who I’m going as. (Stands back, as if to show) Okay, I’ll give you a hint: (imitates Cory) Wow, Shawn, I wish I was as cool as you.

Cory: (Deadpan) I’m sure I have no idea.

Shawn: I’m goin’ as you! Pretty lifelike, huh? So, where’s your costume?

Cory: (Gets up from desk) I’m not going

Shawn: But you have to.

Cory: (Looking out the rainy window) No, I have to stay here, alone, locked in my room where no one can see me.

Shawn: (Removes his wig) What about Topanga, she’s meeting us here, remember?

Cory: (Turns to Shawn, panicked) No. I told her it wasn’t safe. I can’t be responsible for my actions. Only evil will come from tonight.

Shawn: (Smiling) Gonna make your move, huh?

Cory: If I do, it’ll be in all fours. Listen, I gotta tell somebody. (Grabs Shawn’s collar) Shawn, I am one of the undead creatures of the night.

Shawn: (Seriously) Cory, you can’t fool your best friend. Something’s bothering you, isn’t it?

Cory: Listen. (Sits Shawn on the bed) What I’m about to tell you is so bizarre, no one in their right mind would believe it.

Shawn: (Smiling) Then I’m your guy.

Cory: It all started last night…

[Cut to Cory’s backyard, wavy flashback style. Cory enters from his kitchen carrying a trash bag. Feeny also enters with a trash bag in hand]

Feeny: Mr. Matthews, I wouldn’t be taking out that garbage if I were you.

Cory: I had to. It was starting to move.

Feeny: Haven’t you heard?

Cory: I haven’t heard anything, I live upstairs.

Feeny: Well, it seems that a wolf escaped from the Philadelphia Zoo. Authorities believe that it may be somewhere in our area.

Cory: (Incredulously) A wolf? Out here in the ‘burbs?

Feeny: Yes. Probably looking for better schools.

Cory: So how come your taking the garbage back inside the house?

Feeny: Wolves have a keen sense of smell. The garbage would only attract them. (Enters his house, leaves the door open)

Cory: SO your plan is to lure them into the living room?

Feeny: (From his open doorway) Scoff if you will, but as acting head of the Neighborhood Watch, I have duly warned you. (Shuts his house door, he is inside)

Cory: (Starts to walk away) (Voiceover) And that’s when I heard the rustling… (The bush rustles) (Not voiceover, turns to bush, puts down garbage) Hello? (Cautiously, steps forward) Anybody there? (Still steps forward) Eric? (Pauses) Eric and a girl?

[Camera cuts to a shaky view from inside the bush. Cory leans in close]

Cory: Morgan? (Pause, to whatever’s in the bush) Oh, boy, you’re not Morgan. (Growling) AHHHH!!!! (The camera jumps at Cory, as though to show the audience he’s being att*cked by something. Cory’s yell fades as a picture of the full moon shrouded by clouds takes the screen)

[Cut back to Cory’s room, with the wavy flashback effect going. It is continued from before]

Shawn: (Laughs quietly and disbelievingly) Come on, there’s no way you were bitten by a wolf.

Cory: Shawn, what else could it have been? Look at the bite. (Shows him his arm)

Shawn: (Looks closely) I don’t see anything.

Cory: Of course you don’t. Everybody knows werewolf bites heal overnight.

Shawn: (Stands, uncertain) Wow, then… you’re covered with them… (Cory nods) So you’re really turning into a werewolf?

Cory: I didn’t think so until I woke up this morning…

[Cut to Cory & Eric’s bedroom earlier that day, once again via wavy flashback effect. Eric is putting on a watch, while Cory speaks from the bathroom]

Cory: (From bathroom) Eric, what you’re about to see may shock you.

Eric: Then put a towel on.

Cory: (enters in a robe) Okay, look! (Shuts his eyes tight, holds out his arms and puffs his chest, presenting himself)

Eric: Oh my God! I don’t see anything at all!

Cory: Don’t toy with me. It’s all over me! I’ve got hair, huge amounts!

Eric: Yeah, you’re right. Where?

Cory: I’ve got hair on my chin, (touches chin) on my chest, (pulls aside robe lapels, showing his chest) and other places I don’t see where having hair on is really gonna help me.

Eric: (Looks closely) Hey, you’re right. Look, little wispy hairs. Congratulations, you’re going through puberty. (Darkly) At least that’s on explanation…

Cory: Eric, don’t start with me. I’m on the edge, okay?

Eric: (Paces past Cory) It’s just what you told me last night about being bitten by this wolf.

Cory: I didn’t get a good look, it might not have been a wolf.

Eric: So then it certainly wasn’t an ordinary wolf. I mean… I don’t know, buddy. One night you’re bitten by a wolf, the next day you’re the Chia boy. I don’t want to alarm you or anything, but I think you might be turning into… (thunder/lightning strikes, cue scary music) …a werewolf.

Cory: (Chuckles uncomfortably) Come on, who ever heard of a kid turning into a werewolf?

Eric: Oh, no one… (grabs a tabloid newspaper from the bed) Except the most widely read newspaper in America. (Shoves it to Cory) Read this.

Cory: (Takes newspaper, reading) “Siamese Twins Eat Their Way To Freedom.”?

Eric: Oh, no, above the fold. (Flips the paper over)

Cory: (Reading) “Teenage Werewolf Probed by Top Scientists.”

Eric: Mm-hmm. Kid was on a camping trip, got bitten by something he didn’t get a good look at, kinda like you.

Cory: (Stuttering) W-W-What happened to him?

Eric: (Nonchalantly) Oh, nothing, nothing. He just turned into… (thunder/lighting strikes, cue scary music again) …a werewolf.

Cory: (Examining newspaper) This can’t be true.

Eric: Oh, it’s true. Jason’s cousin met a guy at a party who knows a guy who saw the thing. (Cory sits at the desk with Eric over him) They keep it in a secret, steel-walled room in the Pentagon, like this artist rendering. (Points to newspaper) It’s already k*lled six guards. Every full moon, they open this little door and feed it live rats.

Cory: (Gets up, trying to get away, leaving newspaper) Alright, listen. I don’t wanna hear about his anymore, okay? (Faces Eric) I’m not a werewolf. I am not a werewolf!

Eric: (Shrugs) They say the first sign’s denial.

Amy: (Calling from downstairs) Cory, breakfast! I made you something special!

Eric: Mmm-mmm! Big steaming bowl of rats!

[SCENE – Matthews’ kitchen. Cory enters from upstairs. Breakfast is on the table, along with a huge box of soda cans. Amy is sipping coffee, while Alan is shaking each can individually. Cory bypasses the table and heads to the door]

Amy: Cory!

Cory: (Stops, turns around) Alright, I’m a hairy mess. (Holds out arms) Get out your Epilady and just do me!

Amy: No, sweetheart, I was just gonna say, “Don’t forget your lunch.”

Cory: It’s okay, I’ll k*ll something at school. (Turns to the door)

Alan: I sense there’s something on your mind.

Cory: (Slowly steps towards his parents) Well, it’s just this, uh, math problem I’ve been working on. (Opens book, looks in it as though reading) “If a werewolf leaves a train station going forty miles an hour, and another werewolf leaves at sixty miles and hour… (looks up unsurely) Do werewolves exist?”

Alan: Is this about the wolf that escaped from the zoo?

Cory: Could be.

Alan: Cory, werewolves don’t exist. Relax, it’s just a myth. You know, as you get older, you’ll learn how to separate myth from reality. (Shakes can to ea. Then another)

Cory: What’re you doing?

Alan: One of our soda distributors heard about this guy who robbed a jewelry store and mode off with five diamond rings.

Amy: (Smugly) And he hid those diamond rings in five cans of soda. (stands) thus, your father and other grown-ups who can separate myth from reality have been boosting soda sales.

Alan: It’s a three-carat diamond, babe. (Shakes another can)

Amy: I’m so thirsty. (Shakes a can)

[Cut back to Cory & Eric’s room that night, once again via wavy flashback transition]

Cory: Shawn, it’s more than just hair. I’ve got strange new urges. Like last night, I’m watching the move “Untouchables”. You know the scene where Capone is about to smash heads with his baseball bat?

Shawn: Awesome scene.

Cory: Except I’m not into it. The whole time I’m thinking: “I wonder how could the water is on ‘Baywatch’.” (Shrugs, confused)

Shawn: (Pause) Jeez. Whatever you got, you got it bad.

Cory: Yeah, and I didn’t know how bad until lunchtime, when I had this strange craving for a snake…

[Cut to Frank’s House of Yogurt via wavy flashback transition. The sign reads: “Frank’s House of Yogurt” with a small black sign beneath it reading: “and some occult”. Cory approaches the counter, where Frank stands]

Cory: Any special flavors?

Frank: (Speaks with a Russian accent) Yeah, we got Bucket of Blood, that’s like strawberry. And we got Bucket of Guts, that’s more or less chocolate. And we got Smashed and Severed Intestines… I don’t recommend that.

Cory: Can you mix the Blood and Guts?

Frank: All the time.

Man on radio: A search for the missing wolf continues, and with today being Halloween, police report a number of prank calls from people claiming to have seen wolves and even (chuckles) werewolves.

Cory: (To Frank) Werewolves… Isn’t that silly? (Frank glares at him) (Now less jesting, as though searching for confirmation) Isn’t it?

Frank: There are things, and there are things.

Cory: You mean there are things such as werewolves?

Frank: There are places where such things are revealed, for five dollars complete. (Cory hurriedly hands him five dollars) Come with me, werewolf boy. (Opens counter, allowing Cory passage. Leads him through some beads into the dark backroom, where an older woman with thick, curly, red hair awaits. She is sitting at a table with a soda can in front of her, licking an ice cream cone) I give you my aunt on my mother’s side, Madame Ouspanskaya. (Ouspanskaya quickly ditches the ice cream) Mysteries of the occult. (To Ouspanskaya) Madame, I bring you a boy whose soul is heavy with pain.

Ouspanskaya: Has he paid? (Frank hands her the five, she puts it in her cleavage) (To Cory) Come to me, werewolf boy! (Frank exits)

Cory: How did you know?

Ouspanskaya: I know many things. (Cory sits) I know you were bitten by a wolf.

Cory: It’s true.

Ouspanskaya: I know you are now becoming a wolf.

Cory: That’s amazing!

Ouspanskaya: (Smiling) I know you are recently divorced.

Cory: What?

Ouspanskaya: (Leans in, squints) You’re not Billy Joel?

Cory: No.

Ouspanskaya: Well, then you’re just a wolf.

Cory: Yeah, but people turning into wolves? That doesn’t happen, it’s just one of those myths.

Ouspanskaya: Myth? (Cackles) I deal only in truth. (Picks up can, shakes it to Cory’s ear) Do you hear anything in this can?

Cory: No.

Ouspanskaya: (Puts down can) sh**t. Alright, wolfie, listen. You’re body’s about to go through many changes.

Cory: What kind of changes?

Ouspanskaya: You will develop the appetite of a wolf, a taste for things you’ve never eaten before.

Cory: Please don’t say head cheese, because I don’t eat…

Ouspanskaya: (Interrupting) Then the pentagram, the five-pointed star, will appear in your hand. (Points to her palm)

Cory: Is it gonna itch? ‘Cause if it’s wool then there’s just no…

Ouspanskaya: (Interrupting) Shut up. (Cory looks dejected) There is more, but it is too horrible to mention.

Cory: Well, what about for another five bucks? (Stands, takes $5 from his pockets and holds it out to Ouspanskaya)

Ouspanskaya: (Takes the $5, puts it in her cleavage) I feel chatty. (Cory sits) There is a girl who feels deeply for you, but when the madness of the wolf comes upon you, you will repay her love by k*lling her in a gruesome, evil manner.

Cory: (Outraged) I would never do that! …’Cause there is no girl who cares for me.

Ouspanskaya: Go ahead, doubt someone who is licensed by the state! (Points to a giant license on the wall, taps hand on the table authoritatively)

Cory: (Taken aback) You know what? You’re nutty. I don’t think I believe a thing you say. (Stands warily)

Ouspanskaya: I’m nutty? You’re 30 minutes late to your English class!

Cory: (Checks watch) Aah! (Runs to door)

Ouspanskaya: And your underpants are riding up your tuchas!

Cory: (Stops at door) That’s amazing! (Fixes his underpants, exits)

Ouspanskaya: (Smiles proudly, to self) How does she do it?

[SCENE – Turner’s class. Turner is giving a lecture to the class, without Cory in his seat]

Turner: Okay, so we got these snotty little prep-school boys stuck on an island in the middle of nowhere… no lamps, no cars, no shopping malls. (Muses) Not a single luxary…

Shawn: (Realizes) Wait… I’ve read this book.

(Cory enters, running, and quickly opens his notebook at looks up at Turner)

Turner: Matthews, welcome. You were forty minutes late, so we started without you. I hope you don’t mind.

Cory: No, it’s okay, really. What are we up to?

Turner: Well, we just got to this part where this really cool, but angry teacher gives the sweaty kid three days’ detention for being unbelievably late.

Cory: (Not intimidated) Can I get a drink?

Turner: (Addressing the class) Back to “Lord of the Flies”.

Shawn: (Leans forward to Cory, attempting to speak quietly) Where were you?

Cory: (Speaking quietly to Shawn) There was a fortune teller at the yogurt parlor.

Shawn: (Mishearing him) You tortured a fellow named Yogi Tyler?

Cory: (Whispering) Yeah. I’ll write you a note.

Turner: (See Cory writing) Matthews, you’re amazing. No idea what’s going on, yet you’re still taking notes. What you writing? (Cory snatched the paper from his notebook, balls it up and stuffs it in his mouth) Whatcha eating? (Smiles)

Ouspanskaya: (Voiceover, in Cory’s head) You will develop the appetite of the wolf, a taste for things you’ve never eaten before. (Corry, terrified, looks down at the paper in his mouth)

(Bell rings. The whole class gets up to leave except Cory, who is still stunned by the paper-eating incident)

Turner: Okay, Matthews, step into my office. (Cory walks over to and sits on Turner’s desk) You show up way later, you’re eating paper. Yet I think there might be something wrong.

Cory: I’m sorry, I got some things on my mind, I don’t think you’d understand.

Turner: Oh, well, yeah, ‘cause I was never thirteen so I wouldn’t get anything you could possibly be going through. (Sits on an adjacent desk) Can I have my keys back?

Cory: (Has been holding Turner’s key) Oh, yeah, sorry. (Holds them to him, noticed the keychain in the palm of his hand) What’s this?

Turner: It’s the Pentagon. I got it this summer in Washington.

Cory: The Pentagon?

Ouspanskaya: (Voiceover, in Cory’s head) The sign of the pentagram will appear in your hand. (Cory looks at his hand, where Turner’s keychain has left a pentagon-shaped mark)

Cory: (Voiceover?) The pentagon or the pentagram?

Ouspanskaya: (Voiceover, in Cory’s head) Same difference.

Cory: (Runs out of Turner’s room screaming) AAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! (Bumps into Topanga and stops) (Modestly) Hello…

Topanga: Cory, are you okay?

Cory: I think I’m okay. Feel my nose, is it cold?

Topanga: If something’s wrong, you can tell me. It’s not like I don’t care about you.

Ouspanskaya: (Voiceover, in Cory’s head) You will k*ll the one girl who cares for you. (Cory’s mouth is agape)

Cory: (Grabs Topanga’s shoulders) Listen to me, you can’t care for me, okay? If you do, only harm will come to you. It’ll never work out between the two of us.

Topanga: Cory, get a grip. We’re only going to a Halloween party.

Cory: Yeah, that’s how it starts. Then we get married, have kids and I eat them. (Topanga’s looks stunned) What kind of family is that?

Topanga: Maybe you should take a nap before the party.

Cory: Farewell, think of me as I was. (Runs to exit, Feeny stops him)

Feeny: Mr. Matthews, no running in the halls. We are not animals.

Cory: (Stops, howling) AAAOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! (Exits, Feeny shakes his head)

[SCENE – Cory and Eric’s room. It is that stormy night again, with Cory still talking to Shawn]

Cory: Everything Madame Ouspanskaya predicted has come true. And now only one part of the prophecy remains unfulfilled… I gotta k*ll Topanga.

Shawn: What a drag. Girl finally likes you, and you’re gonna off her. (Sits on Cory’s bed) You know, this could really hurt you socially.

Cory: What can I do? My paws are tied.

Shawn: Does anyone else know?

Cory: No, you’re the only one. The only one!

(Eric enters carrying a doggy bowl of food and water. He puts it on the floor between Shawn and Cory, then howls)

Eric: AOOOO!!!

Cory: (Joining Eric) AAOOOOOO!!!! (Eric exits) He’s family.

Shawn: Listen… (Cory gets on all fours and begins eating from his doggy bowl) Since you’re going through this change, can I have your autographed Lenny Dykstra ball?

Cory: (Stands up, snatched the baseball) Not my ball!

Shawn: Cory, you don’t need it, you’re a wolf.

Cory: I can still fetch. (Places it on his desk)

Shawn: Listen, on the off chance that you are turning into this werewolf, why don’t we head down to the drugstore? They’ve got that aisle, beauty aids. If they got stuff that can take the ‘stache off my mother, they’ve gotta have something for you.

Cory: Don’t you think I already thought of that? Listen, after school I want back to Madame Ouspanskaya’s…

[Cut to the backroom at Frank’s House of Frozen Yogurt (and Some Occult), Madame Ouspanskaya sits, reading the newspaper. Cory enters, hurried]

Cory: Madame Ouspanskaya, everything you predicted has come true.

Ouspanskaya: (Puts newspaper down) No kidding! Mind if I use you as a reference?

Cory: Listen, (sits) I found out there is a girl who cares for me, just like you said.

Ouspanskaya: Well, have you k*lled her yet?

Cory: No.

Ouspanskaya: Well, why not?

Cory: I don’t know.

Ouspanskaya: Oh… (Smugly) I know… You will not k*ll her till the moon is full.

Cory: When will the moon be full?

Ouspanskaya: Well, according to USA Today, tonight at exactly nine ‘o’clock.

Cory: Listen, you gotta help me. Isn’t there an antidote or something?

Ouspanskaya: That’s easy. Wear a garlic necklace and get back in your coffin.

Cory: No, I’m not a vampire, I’m a werewolf.

Ouspanskaya: Tomatoes, To-mah-toes… As long as you’re not my son.

Cory: (Stands, frustrated) Listen, you gotta help me!

Ouspanskaya: Okay, okay, sit. (Cory does) Good boy. Now, (reading from a book in front of her) “the only way to end the curse is to be sh*t through the heart with a silver b*llet fired by one who loves you.”

Cory: Couldn’t I maybe just start with some vitamin C and work my way up?

Ouspanskaya: (Cackles, turns into violent coughing) (Through coughs) Frank!!

Frank: (from front) What?

Ouspanskaya: (Coughing) A cigarette?

[SCENE – Matthews’ kitchen. Amy enter with Alan behind her, carrying another box of soda cans. Each of them has a grocery bag. Cory is in the kitchen, along with Morgan in a cute little devil costume]

Alan: Hi, guys.

Amy: Morgan, that’s costume is so you! (Morgan smiles) (She and Alan place their grocery bags on the counter)

Cory: (Manically) My stuff! Where is it? Where’s my… (Pours out a grocery bag)

Amy: Your stuff, lets’ see, that would be… (Reading Cory’s request from her list) “Wolfbane, silver b*ll*ts, g*n.” (Mockingly) Oh, the lady ahead of me took the last g*n. (Shrugs)

Cory: Fine, Mom, is that too much to ask for? That you could take a minute and, oh, maybe save my immortal soul? I guess not… But look! (Grabs container, holds it up) You got Morgan’s gummy worms! (Exits into living room, placing the gummy worms in front of Morgan)

Morgan: I’ll share my worms with him.

Alan: Aw, that’s very sweet of you. (Walks over, kisses her head) (To Amy) I’ll take care of this, it’s kind of a guy thing. (Exits)

Amy: (Quietly, to Morgan) The crazy ones always are. (Morgan smiles broadly)

[Cut to the Matthews’ living room. Alan enter, Cory is inspecting a picture frame]

Cory: Is this silver? Can I melt it down?

Alan: (Chuckles) Do you know what hormones are?

Cory: (Taps frame) I could get five, six b*ll*ts out of this.

Alan: Do you know what raging hormones are?

Cory: (Disinterested) Yeah, it’s one of those rides. Listen, Dad, you love me, right?

Alan: Yes, I do. Where is this going?

Cory: I can’t melt this down, I’m just being crazy. (Hands Alan the frame) Here, throw this at my heart really, really hard. (Steps back and holds out arms, anticipating blow)

Alan: You’re going through some changes, aren’t you?

Cory: Yes,

I am.

Alan: You know what those changes are?

Cory: (Steps forward, slightly surprised) Seriously? No kidding?

Alan: Yeah.Cory: I’m a werewolf. (Tamely) Ah-ooo…

Alan: (Hugs him) Of course you are. (Kisses his head, rubs his arm) And if you misbehave as a werewolf I’ll be happy to sh**t you. But on the off chance that you’re turning into a man and not a wolf, this could just be the beginning of adulthood.

Cory: Dad, I’m not becoming a man, I’m becoming man’s best friend. Listen, just put some paper on the floor and I’ll get the hang of it.

Alan: Down boy. (Sits on the couch, as does Cory) Remember when you were little and you used to watch me shave and you wanted to shave, so I gave you a razor without a blade and you put whipped cream on your face and scraped it off? Hmm? Well, maybe it’s time I gave you a real razor. (Noticing Cory’s lack of real whiskers) It wouldn’t have to be, um, very sharp, but, uh… I don’t know. How do you think you’d look with a beard? (Pats Cory paternally, puts down picture, goes upstairs)

Cory: (Stands, walks over to a mirror and looks at himself. In the mirror, he sees lightning strike and his face transform into a werewolf face. The werewolf face in the mirror, supposedly Cory, screams in fear) AAAAHHHHHH!!! (Cory, still looking normal, runs up the stairs, encountering Alan, who is on the way down)

Alan: Hey, where you going? (Holds up razor)

Cory: (Panicked) It’s happening! Just like she said! (Howls) AAOOOOOOO!!!!

[Cut back to Cory’s room that night with the wavy transition. Cory is, once more, writing, while Shawn goes through Cory’s stuff, putting a medal in the sack he has]

Cory: (Reading what he’s writing) “So I hope you will all forgive me as I cannot escape my destiny. Fondly, Cory A.O. Matthews.”

Shawn: (After taking a trophy, holding a small globe) What’s the A.O. stand for?

Cory: Ah-ooo. (Shawn puts the globe in his sack) What’re you doing?

Shawn: (Holding Cory’s shoes) I’m taking your running shoes. (Amused) If you don’t have four of a kind there’s really no point.

Amy: (From downstairs, calling up) Cory, Topanga’s here!

Cory: (On clock, sees that it’s 8:58) Oh, no, she’s here. Here, come here, (Goes over to Shawn) Shawn, I need you to do something for me. Promise me you’ll keep Topanga away from me. Swear by everything holy that you’ll do everything in your power (Topanga enters behind him in a pink dress) to keep that poor, innocent girl from a terrible… (Turns, see Topanga behind him) Hi, Topanga. (Turns away) (Scared) Aah!

Shawn: (Pats Cory’s arm) I’ll just leave you two alone. Have a good time. (Exits howling) Ah-OOOOOOO!!!

Topanga: Hi, Cory.

Cory: Topanga, I warned you not… (Realizes her outfit) Oh, boy, why’d you have to wear that?

Topanga: Because I’m a damsel. But not the distressed kind. One who’s very together and in complete control of her own destiny.

Cory: Great, look. I think you’re a terrific person, I like you a whole lot… and I never wanna see you again. (Goes to window)

Topanga: But, Cory, I don’t’ understand.

Cory: Listen, (holds up the memoir he’s been writing) everything you need to know is in here. (Holds the notebook) If it’s ever publishes, I’d like the royalties to go to the ASPCA. Now out, out! (Tries to shoo her away)

Topanga: But, Cory…

Cory: (Interrupting) Topanga, I’m not like the other guys. I’ve got needs and desires, and I’m not sure I can control them. (Looks out the window, the full moon stares back at him) The moon!

Ouspanskaya: (Voiceover, in Cory’s head) When the moon is full, you will k*ll the one who cares for you.

Cory: (Tries to shove Topanga out the door) (Panicked) Alright, you gotta get out. Please, get out before it’s too late. (Cory sees the clock change from 8:59 to 9:00) It’s too late! (Thunder/lighting strikes) (Turns to Topanga) Okay, look at me. Tell me what you see.

Topanga: I see you.

Cory: No, you don’t. You see hair and teeth and the beast within me.

Topanga: (Grabs Cory’s shoulders) No. I see Cory. The same Cory I’ve known since I was three.

Cory: I’m not a wolf? (Looks at his hand) (Celebrating) I’m not a wolf, I’m not a wolf! (Looks at Topanga, then they lean in and kiss. Meanwhile, thunder/lightning strikes)

Topanga: (After kissing) Yes you are.

Cory: (Howling) AAAAOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

[TAG – Matthews’/Feeny’s backyard. Cory is outside with a recycling bin full of cans when Feeny enters from his house with a bag of garbage.]

Cory: Mr. Feeny, you’re putting your garbage back outside again. What about the wolf?

Feeny: Didn’t you hear? He was in the zoo the whole time. They found him in the aviary, dining on a cockatoo.

Cory: So he never really escaped at all?

Feeny: Funny how rumors start, isn’t it? (Takes a can from Cory’s bin and shakes it to his ear) Drat. (Returns to can) Well, goodnight, Mr. Matthews. (Exits)

Cory: Wait a minute, no wolf? (Turns to the bush) Well then, what was…? (The bush rustles) (Puts down the bin) (to whatever’s in the bush) Oh, it’s you again, isn’t it? (Steps closer) Alright, come here you creature of the night. (Camera angle from inside the bush, Cory steps closer) Come out, you demon beast! Come out! (Camera angle back to normal, a rabbit jumps out from the bush) A rabbit. (Picks it up, slightly dejected) A fuzzy, cuddly rabbit. I got all worked up over you? (The rabbit growls scarily) That’s better… (Puts down the rabbit, runs inside)