02x24 - Game Show Didi/Toys in the Attic

[bunniefuu]

[ Snoring]

[ Gasps]

[ Kids laughing]

Man:
with clyde gone to get us some
more pork rinds and cream cheese

I lowered my line into the lake

With nothing but a bare hook
on the end.

Well, danged
if I didn't feel a bite.

And it wasn't just any old bite,
it was a bii-ii-ite.

I knew right then
I had snagged me a walla pike.

[ Snoring]

[ Gasps]

No, no,
no, honey.

Don't you know
that focusing so
closely on images

Can permanently damage
your vision?

Hey, hold your horses,
I was watching that.

Sorry, pop

But this could be

The most important
half hour of my life.

I've been waiting all week

To see corky land
that walla pike.

Come on, pop, if didi
wins on super stumpers

We could be the proud owners
of a fabulous new dinette set.

But what difference

Does it make if she
watches one more show?

She knows
all the answers.

Oh, pop, I don't know
allthe answers.

Besides, I have
to study my competition.

Betty says the key to victory

Is finding
your opponent's weak spot

And attacking it like
a rabid junkyard doberman.

Well, um, oh,
look, it's starting.

Announcer:
this is super stumpers!

And here's our host,
mr. Alan quebec.

Good evening,
and welcome to another edition
of super stumpers.

You all remember
last nights's winner

Our physics professor
from athens, georgia

Mr. Jarvis brown.

Our challenger tonight

Who lists
his occupation as "genius"

Is mr. Edmund haynes
of philadelphia.

Hello, alan, hello, world.
[ Applause]

"This alabama river

Was the site
of the first..."

That would be
the tombigbee river, alan.

Wow!

Uh-oh.

Well, that doesn't
mean anything.

He was just lucky.

Our next category is
presidential food favorites.

There's no way
he'll get this one.

"What was president
nixon's favorite..."

Ketchup and cottage cheese.

Correct.

Phosphoric acid,
of course, alan.

The st. Louis cardinals...

Unless I'm mistaken, alan

Thor curley was
the waldorf's first chef.

The honeysuckle
is an azalea.

Surely everyone
knows that.

Fatty arbuckle, alan.

An incredible performance.

You've almost doubled
the highest score

In super stumpershistory.

I had no doubt, alan.

In fact, I expect to top
that mark on tomorrow's show.

Well, I guess we
don't really need

A new dinette
set after all.

Yeah, I just hope they don't
take away the one we got.

Look, deed,
if you want to, uh...

Get sick tomorrow,
we'll all understand.

No, stu, I'll be there.

No self-appointed genius
is going to keep me

From the game-show
glory that is mine!

You have to be able to give me

All the presidents' wives'
maiden names

In under a minute.

Oh, betty, I don't think

I can fit any more useless
trivia into my brain.

Maybe I just don't have
what it takes to b*at that guy.

Come on, think
like a champion.

Now, what's next?

Oh, well, I ama little rusty

On chinese m*llitary history.

What's your mom
trying to find

In those books?

And why aren't they
tearing out the pages

And eating them?

I think they're reading.

Reading?

Why?

I think my
mommy's tired.

Maybe she's trying

To find a good
breadtime story.

How's the studying
going, deed?

Triskaidekaphobia, alan.

Oh, it's you, stu.

Maybe you better
call it quits
for the night.

I'll just put
tommy to bed.

Say, deed...

Don't worry about
that show tomorrow.

But if you do win

Would you mind requesting
the anglermatic tackle box?

Oh!

Night, night, sweetie.

Mommy loves you so much.

It doesn't matter to you

If I win some dumb
old game, does it?

It's just that, well, I've never
won anything in my whole life.

For once I thought
I was going to come out on top

And then along comes
that genius.

Oh, well, I guess
I never will find

My place
in the sun.

Good night, tommy.

Stu:
isn't this exciting?
A real tv studio.

Aw, what's
the big deal?

Radio with pictures,
it'll never work.

Look, there's wuggles the mule.

Hey, guess what,
you guys.

I think
I found out

What my mom is
trying to find.

What?

Her place in the sun.

Place in the sun?

But tommy,
she'll melt.

People don't
melt, lillian.

They get sumbermed.

Melt.

Guys, guys!

I don't think she's going
to melt or get sumbermed.

But I do think
she needs our help.

Hey, tommy, lookit.

There's
your mommy.

We got to help
her find the sun

So she can get her place in it
and be happy again.

Announcer:
this is super stumpers.

And here's our host,
mr. Alan quebec.

Good evening, and welcome to
another mind-expanding edition
of super stumpers.

You all know
edmund haynes

From last night's game

So let me introduce

Our challenger,
a schoolteacher
and mother

Mrs. Didi pickles.

Good evening, alan.

You see that?

She's a cobra
ready to strike.

Well, it looks like
our challenger is ready

So let's play super stumpers.

"The highest point

In australia..."

Mount kosciusko,
alan

, Feet.

"This silent film
star's sister was..."

Cappy epstein, jr.

That's correct, edmund.

Another good night for you.

Poor didi--

She hasn't got a chance.

Look, you guys.

The sun!

"This fish..."

That would
be the halibut.

Correct.

Lil:
where did
it go, tommy?

If we split up

We could find
it faster.

Good idea, you
guys go that way

I'll go this way.

"This automotive tool
is used to tighten bolts."

What is
a torque wrench?

Right, and didi,
you don't have to phrase it

As a question.

Torque wrench? How'd
she come up with that?

Beats me.

"This tiny insect

Is noted..."

The tsetse fly.

Correct.

That's odd,
these don't taste like goats.

Cut, cut.

The line is "oats,"
wuggles, "oats"!

Not "goats."

Wow!

I can only talk
for a bit

I really ought to be
watching these monitors.

Then again, what could
possibly go wrong?

[ Gasps]

The sun!

So our challenger, didi pickles

Is now within points
of our champion.

All right, didi.

Pretty exciting,
huh, sport?

[ Gasps]

The kids!

Oh, no, not again.

What the...

Uh, uh... "This document..."

Treaty of versailles!

"This pop music star..."

Chubby checker!

"This strain of..."

Streptococcus!

"In the th..."

Third law of thermodynamics!

"The book of genesis..."

Mr. Ararat!

"In what nation..."

Zaire!

Arugula!

Henry david thoreau!

Steve garvey!

Reptar on ice!

The velvet
underground!

Rosemary clooney!

Uvula!

The edomites!

Marion michael
morrison!

Bermuda grass!

Tommy:
oh, no, the sun!

It's gone!

No, judy, I'm sure
they're right underneath the...

The whig party, pinochle,
the pickwick papers,mint julep

Sutter's mill, aristophanes

d*ck van patten,
mello yello

Islets of langerhans

Walter gropius,
brian's song

Molotov-ribbentrop!

Sorry, tommy,
I didn't see the sun at all.

Me neither,
tommy.

I saw the sun, but it went away.

Stu:tommy!
There you are!

Hey, wuggles!

Let's go, tommy.

Your mom's about
to win a fondue set.

You mean
stewed prunes.

Or we could get

The bug zapper.

Millard fillmore.

That's it, didi, you've
won the game and the match

For the highest-point total
in super stumpershistory.

[ Applause]

So what'll
it be, didi?

The dinette set?

The anglermatic
tackle box?

Fondue set?

Stewed prunes?

Bug zapper?
Take your pick.

What about that gold-plated
dalmatian statuary?

Dalmatian?

A fine
choice.

Well, that's all
the time we have left.

Join us
again tomorrow

For another exciting
game of super stumpers.

She found it!

She found her place
in the sun.

[ Cheering and applause]

[ Bell tolling]

Ow!

Honey, please.

Ow, ooh, ooh!

Now, you be
a good little boy

For grandma and grandpa.

Ouch!

Buy, daddy, why can't
I come with you?

Sweetie, we'd
love to take you

But mommy and I need
some time alone

To... To...
To buy you new presents.

But I don't want

To stay at the
old people's house.

It's dusty and
smells funny.

Now, honey...

It's only for a few days.

But they don't even have cable!

It's not going to
be so bad, angelica.

They're nice.

Oh, yeah?
Well, you'll see how nice it is

When all the ghosts come out.

Heh, heh, heh!

Look who's here.

You're ten minutes late.

So where's my little dumpling?

Umph, didi, is this
the most beautiful baby

In the whole world?

Oh, but he's so thin.

What are you feeding him,
the rice cakes again?

Hello, angelica!

Are you
looking forward

To spending the
weekend with us?

Yes, mr. Tommy's grandpa, sir.

I'm... Very excited.

Didi:
listen, mom, dad

Are you sure
this is okay?

It's been a long time
since you had kids.

Your house isn't
exactly child-proof.

Child-proof,
schmild-proof!

Children was playing
in this house

Before you was born.

If there's one house that's
perfect for the kinderlach

This is it.

Angelica:
wow!

Maybe this isn't
going to be so
bad after all.

Come on, guys, we
got a plane to catch.
We'll miss the nuts.

Bye, tommy.

Be good, bye-bye.

Bye, angel, take care.

Do whatever boris
and minka say.

Ooh!

Ay-ay-ay, what is
all these things?

I don't know.

In the old country

We never had
all this verkacktestuff.

To take the babies to town,
you just threw them in the wagon

And hitched up the goats.

Minka:
I know, I know.

These kids
today think

They invented
the kinderlach.

All it takes is
a little common...

Yaaaa!

A little common yaaaa?

Yaaaa!

Whoa!

Got you.

Minka:
boris!

Boris:
noooo!

My tchotchkes!

Mein gott!

Now, thisis fun.

Got him.

Vay iz mir!

Boris:
ay-ay-ay-ay-ay!

[ Gasps]

It's no use.

They've got me.

Good job,
tommy.

You had to break
all those neat toys.

Now what are
we going to play with?

Ay-ay-ay-ay-ay!

Well, that's
everything.

I put the china
in the linen closet.

I put the capo di monte
in the bedroom and locked it.

What are we going to do now?

Turn on the sesame seed
for them to watch.

Am I your servant girl?

Why don't you
turn it on?

I can't, I'm too old.

I'm old too.

I'm older.

By two weeks!

It was leap year.

Leap year, schmeep year.

Now, go turn on the seed.

Wait a minute,
I got a better idea.

Let's all take a nap.

Hey, angelica,
what's up there?

That's where
the ghosts are

And they're going
to come and get you.

Heh, heh, heh, heh, heh!

Boris, did you
find the crib?

It's under all these big boxes.

Well, don't hurt yourself.

Those things is heavy.

Don't worry, I got insurance.

You okay?

Did you hurt your shmegegge?

No, I think I'm okay.

Just find
the policy.

So that's
what's up there.

Toys!

That's it, good as new.

Hmm, I guess
the woodenpeckers got at it.

Well, it's good enough.

Night, night,
sleep tight.

Don't let the dybbuks bite.

Hey, angelica?

Yeah?

What's a dybbuk?

Well, it's kind of
like a ghost, only scarier

And it lives
in your bed.

Since you're up, let's go.

Where?

Up the stairs

To find those toys.

But angelica, you said
there's ghosts up there.

You heard what they
did to grandpa--

They hurt his shmegegge.

Look, tommy,
there ain't no ghosts.

I was lying to you before.

Angelica, if you
was lying to me before

How do I know you're
not lying to me now?

Hmm, good point.

How do you know
I'm not lying to you now?

Because I'm bigger than you!

Now, come on.

Where's chuckie when I need him?

There it is,
let's go.

What about the ghosts?

There ain't
no ghosts!

What about the dybbuks?

Get up there!

Ghosts!

Nah, it's just the wind.

You go first.

How's my little dumplings?

Boris, wake up.

The dumplings are gone.

Nah, they're in the icebox
where I left them.

Not those dumplings.

The childrens!

Oy, the dumplings!

Uh, angelica,
maybe we should go back.

And give up
all those toys?

What are you,
a dumnick?

I don't know, what's a dumnick?

Oy!

Oy, they're not in the kitchen.

They're not in the bedrooms.

Could they have crawled
out the front door?

[ Gasps]

Yoo-hoo, kids, where are you?

Aha!

Minka, minka, I found them.

Thanks be to gott.

Good work, mr. Columbo,
only one problem.

What's that, darling?

You got
the wrong kids!

Wow!

This is great!

Tommy, start
looking for toys.

There's probably a whole
mountain of them around here.

[ Coughing]

Hey!

[ Grunting]

Help, tommy, I'm stuck.

Hang on, angelica!

I'll get you out.

Wow!

Toys!

See, I told you, tommy.

This place is
chock-full of toys.

It's a golden mine of toys,
and they're mine, all mine.

Oh, here, you
can have this one.

Catch!

Both:
ghosts!

[ Screaming]

[ Screaming]

Angelica:
run!

Wait for me!

[ Screaming]

[ Ragtime tune playing]

Ghost music!

Make it stop!

Please don't take me,
mr. Ghost!

I'm only three!

Take him!

He's just
a dumb baby!

[ Screaming]

Oh, you little
dumplings.

Thanks be to gott,
you're all right.

There you are.

Hey, minka, look.
The old toys.

I knew they was around
here somewhere.

And here's my old
dressmaker's dummy.

Look how thin I was.

Your grandma minka was
the most beautiful girl

In the whole village.

Oy, boris,
you're making me flush.

You mean you were
a little girl?

Of course I was.

Get out of here.

Here, look,
there's pictures.

And this is
grandpa boris

When he drove the mules
through the fence.

I did not drive
through the fence.

That shnook heisel moved it
during the night.

How was I to know?

Why didn't you use a truck
to drive through the fence?

We didn't have...

I did notdrive
through the fence!

[ Doorbell rings]

That must be the kids.

We're back.

Well, did you have a nice time
with your club mud

Your sparkling water bottles

And your pizzas
with no cheese?

It was wonderful.

How'd you do
with the kids?

We had a great time, daddy.

We played with neat toys
and looked at neat pictures

And we heard some great jolson!

Didn't you miss
not having cable?

Cable-schmable!

Who needs cable

When you got family
by your sides?

Stu:
look, there's wuggles the mule!